overwateredflower

[overwateredflower]

Thursday the 2

[overwateredflower]

the purpose of friends is to have people who unconditionally hate your shitty exes & relatives. like maybe YOU have a complex relationship with your father but i sure don't. i'm outside his house with a gun. he's not the unforgivable asshole who raised me he's just an unforgivable asshole

[overwateredflower]

what do you mean i have to go to work today. when i just did it yesterday???

[overwateredflower]

In 2025 let’s have my friend break up with her crusty bf

[overwateredflower]

starting tomorrow i will be super normal fun kind sexy and functioning

[overwateredflower]

we're having sex and you pull out at the end to discover your cock is entirely gone, dissolved (ive digested it like a pitcher plant). bye!

[overwateredflower]

"Don't worry my beautiful mutual, I'll save you!" *Changes your two note flop post into a four note flop post*

[overwateredflower]

if you are considering bangs out loud to me then honey I am the devil on your shoulder. if this is a ledge I'm pushing you off it

[overwateredflower]

[overwateredflower]

how u doing

im not thinking about it

[overwateredflower]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to be infertile

[overwateredflower]

Tried of saying "this character has autism this character has anxiety" let's step it up a bit. I'm gunna start saying megatron has erectile dysfunction

[overwateredflower]

a man shooting a nerf gun at his light switch from the bed, missing every shot, and going to sleep with the lights on

[overwateredflower]

Here's Your Wrapped AI Podcast! shut the fuck up and give me my genres back

wrapped sucked i hate ai

[overwateredflower]

When Spotify wrapped told me I was listening to "victorian tavern dark cabaret" specifically in April... Like 🙄 ok Spotify, your AI is just saying random words now

[overwateredflower]

This year’s spotify wrapped is so lame. No specific slide for all the genres we listened to this year? No personality types or some other fun thing? This looks as if someone made it yesterday, disappointed

[overwateredflower]