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reviewing old art and being very fond of my stupid characters that are complete bullshit aside from self indulgence. they hold a place in my dumbass superhero-loving heart. i like to see them be fags 2gether

i have more. other guys with more art i rediscovered. rat and sue (sue belongs to my friend)

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been thinkin about these guys latelyyyy aghGHH i miss drawing like an insane person. i draw them on paper on my work breaks </3 and i got gouache recently and ive been chipping away at a tiny painting of shin.

but i wanna do comic againnn i wanna draw themmmm. i feel like im getting their characters a lil more defined and now i wanna play )): but i dont have time,..or energy...

portraits today. for fun. with denshin's early story hair

[ OCs koun, teal hair - he/they ; denshin, red hair - they/them ]

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mainly thinking abt this bc of the drag show i went to & the drag artists i know/follow but im thinking about the idea of characters drag personas (not seriously, just having thoughts) and how much gil rejects hard feminity, doesn't want makeup on his face, doesn't like feminine clothes, etc so if he was somehow convinced to do a drag fit for even a night he'd be so sloppy about it lol. he would NOT do anything to create fake cleavage, youd be seeing his bush and hairy legs lmao. the makeup would look like he had a fucked up night and woke up the next day with it. i love him and he is funny to me. maybe he'd have fun with big ass shoes though.

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am a lil drunk but i gotta yell into the void. ive been having fun by myself in my brain-head & writing my lil characters in my freetime and not caring whether its good and now my intoxicated brain is like "actually some of these designs rule how did i do that" like do you ever have that moment where youre temporarily not your worst critic. ill sober up and go back to the regular "do better cause this could be infinitely better" mentality but momentarily im like ok. i guess sometimes it doesn't suck so bad. i like my characters even if no one cares so ill keep making them

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ok wait this is so embarrassing bc now i see this war boy design is stupid and i dont think i really Got It at the time but this was skulk's original design nonsense from when i was 19 or so and drew on photoshop and sometimes paper. im different now. so is he.

war boy from years ago brought back all because i saw furiosa a couple times. i gave him a driver too

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infoooo: skulk is a tough bastard, a lancer, not very friendly and a little on the quiet side. i decided to give him a widdle bit of tragedy and half heartedly made his driver, who dan named staple. they moved up as war boys together and became a very good team. then they got feelings for each other (because im me and its not one of my characters unless theres a gay romance in the vicinity). staple's cancer worsens and becomes more obvious over time, eventually the sickness kills him, which is when skulk is seen with a second bandana on his arm. shown below. idk what he does after but i figure hes not a useful war boy unless he's a lancer with a driver so maybe he's forced to get a new partner but i dont imagine he'd get close to anyone after staple's death.

war boy from years ago brought back all because i saw furiosa a couple times. i gave him a driver too

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gil in therapy

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been holding onto these, filled out a fun character meme of cas & gil ^^

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thinking abt his hair and how my sketchy style doesnt really portray the best idea of what his texture is supposed to be, but he's also very lazy about hair and isnt consistent with care. if he treated it differently, i think itd probably look bigger. but hes the type thats effortlessly good-looking and it even applies to his hair most of the time lol.

like he'll put it up after he washes it, and sometimes for bed, but he sleeps on his stomach so he tends to think that that means it wont get flattened. being blessed with good genes means it doesnt take much to fix it either. it's easy like this for him with many things, i'm sure.

his features take more after his mom. dean sorta takes more after their dad. its probably kinda nice for gil though cause he's lowkey mama's boy, just cant show it cause. yknow. shes not alive. but at least he has pretty voluminous curls!!

i have a lot of other stuff i could be doing but, like?? what if i drew gil 9 times

[ OC gil, he/him ]

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just here to blab cause i havent been having much fun drawing lately, and ive been sick a lot which is abnormal for me, and i got them chronic headaches,

but at least i can project thoughts on silly gay characters and pretend like theyre the main characters in the shows and movies i watch

reviewing past ideas this week since its nice when i dont have anything else i want to do. its nice to go back and see their beginnings again which is mostly just gil being unreadable and emotionally distant and cas being so desperate to keep gil in his life that he ignores all those red flags & pines painfully.

but i write pretty much everything down, so i have all those random thoughts like Domestic Moment #4306 and What If They Were Strangers, or the alternative, What If They Got Together Much Earlier. yknow how it goes. being my own fanfiction writer.

i like writing gil as being inexplicably alluring and its usually just because of small things like how he talks or his body language, on top of the fact he's tall and hot in a grungy way. and cas, even though he's gil's oldest friend, has such a hard time reading him because of gil's unique brand of being guarded (never being vulnerable or transparent). it all adds to the mystery and people (/cas) wanting to get in close for a chance to figure him out.

even in high school, cas wouldnt always be aware of what was happening in his best friend's life. gil's guardedness manifested in his teenage years as keeping the secret of his father's abuse, whether he was just scared of the consequences of others knowing, or he's embarrassed for his own circumstances, but cas' ability to look closely and be a friend without making gil feel bad about himself is part of why they were best friends. that, and cas being (at the time) a good cishet ally boy that respects his friends ;0

while this isnt what happens in their lil story, i do also like to consider what itd be like if cas was brave enough to recognize/act on the feelings he wouldnt admit he had for his friend, back when they were teenagers. cas thought he was straight for many years after high school, but i could also see a reality where ~ally~ cas becomes "experimenting doesnt inherently mean anything". hehe. would make their separation all the more heartbreaking for lil cas.

then, in a universe where they don't meet until theyre adults with separate lives, how that could look. like because of everything above, maybe it'd be expected that gil wouldn't give a person like cas a real chance, that he'd be especially difficult because the lack of history makes it that much harder to break down his walls. but then, what about exhausted gil, alone for the same reasons as usual, choosing it & all his connections with other people usually not extending beyond a single night. this guy, meeting someone who responds to gil's flirtation without going the obvious route and taking gil home for the same reason as everyone else-- but instead, just talks to him, and is oddly the nicest and easiest person to be around. gil's experiences creating expectations thatre shattered by a lil punky guy who doesn't make gil feel alone or like he's around for only one thing.

commitment-phobe gil meeting cas in his mid 20s and somehow agreeing to a date because his curiosity is honestly piqued by this surprise encounter. it seems like it shouldnt be shocking to have a decent conversation with a decent person, but a messy person can somehow manage to completely avoid any positive people. especially if they surround themselves with stoners, dealers, and club rats.

ive said it before but ig they really do have a "i can fix him" dynamic but it actually sorta works? gil isnt as messy, eventually lol. kinda the point.

but i love a circumstance of a guy being all "i don't do relationships, i don't believe in love, bachelor lyfe 4eva, ima fuck this whole city" and then going completely mushy because someone is patient and committed to him. gotchu now bitch... u DO relationship.. u DO believe in love, you are settling down and fucking one man only. i would say sorry but youre happy now bitch ✋caught in 4k

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thinking abt them again& wondering if its just gonna be a thing that, at the beginning of every year, im having juliet+koda thoughts (from feb '22)

i also drew oz on my lunch today..not shown. but val+cal are also getting brainpower from me (jan '22)

idk i barely have anything interesting to say. especially not for others to hear. i think this is what they call "rotating it in my mind"

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cw for domestic abuse mentions: violence & mental abuse

about gil & cas changing from a friendship to a romantic relationship & cas having one condition that gil talks. there's a good amount of preamble to this conversation but i only have so much time 🙏

( if u havent seen my characters before, theyre friends since high school, gil disappeared, their relationship became confusing until cas confesses )

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side info about denshin and koun, kept in the drafts but im just sharing one bit

this is jody. alien version & human version.

for context, in original universe, jody was just a person in denshin and koun's cadet program. denshin & jody dated for a while, just as koun was developing feelings & den+koun were becoming solidified as best friends. denshin & jody just broke up because they were going two different places & they werent completely compatible. so it wasnt an ugly end, but they didnt talk that much after, especially when denshin went off on the big mission with koun, neptune, and the others.

much later on in the story, they have a friendly call to catch up. happens to be at a good time because denshin's going through a hard time and jody is nice to them.

also an excuse to share Lament again:

she/they. four eyed alien with 12 fingers. body is tall, longer limbs than humans, very noodly body. extremely smart engineer that has a lot of skills and talents, she's on the older side of the crew, which is already a pretty young group. she's also not mentally well but plays it cool, chills by themselves, but is never not drinking & drunk. neptune thinks lament is a real hassle for their personality and lack of sobriety, but she's a valuable crew member.

around the time mentioned above, when denshin is having a hard time, lament and denshin sort of make friends as two loners struggling mentally. lament isnt a bad friend, but theyre not overly close.

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his gd baby face...i had to un-baby it slightly but he's still 👶 tbf his sister's the same way

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so about this image

drew this picture when i was 18, which was 2017. i made these characters when i was 17ish i believe, and made the bulk of their story within a year. originally i wrote them to die young. think "doomed world" type shit. che was lucky enough to be revived the first time, but it came at a toll and the whole event messed with theo pretty badly.

che's first death (pictured here) was when a villain forced her henchman into going into the "school", and found che alone. they fought, and he killed her, but he was injured. so when her boss came and found che still alive and weak, she sliced the side of his throat and he bled out

eventually when everything went to shit, they were supposed to pretty much all die in a big event, like an apocalypse caused by a villain. like if ozymandias wasnt smart and just wanted destruction. lmao

i made stuff for myself where things were different, just bc :B but since i was so young when i made them i kinda wanted to change things so i have....theyre probably not all gonna die haha;;

old art stuff of che&theo and a lil extra... theyre significantly old characters so theres a lot of stuff from when i was still drawing with markers on sketchbooks, didnt own a drawing tablet (': yikes

first..haha......a few years ago i was messing around, drawing them as girls. cause im GAYY. i think i messed around with the idea of making them human. girl che would really go for the Full Sexy

other stuff, going back relatively in order

very small graphite drawing of what i imagined structures to look like

original jasmine stuff. probably the only times i actually drew her. she could separate her limbs at will

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old art stuff of che&theo and a lil extra... theyre significantly old characters so theres a lot of stuff from when i was still drawing with markers on sketchbooks, didnt own a drawing tablet (': yikes

first..haha......a few years ago i was messing around, drawing them as girls. cause im GAYY. i think i messed around with the idea of making them human. girl che would really go for the Full Sexy

other stuff, going back relatively in order

very small graphite drawing of what i imagined structures to look like

original jasmine stuff. probably the only times i actually drew her. she could separate her limbs at will

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i wish there were 15 of me so each one could focus only on one subject and i could do everything i want to do so badly

sometimes i just wanna wholly commit myself to one subject but i like too many things and possess 1/4 a brain and a singular dominant drawing hand

gotta get good