oldstephblog-blog - Tumblr blog

[oldstephblog-blog]

I miss your smile.

[oldstephblog-blog]

Bucky's words took her by surprise  and she sat there and studied him for a moment. She was taken off  guard for two reasons- one being that she was becoming accustomed to the silence. The second being  that she thought they had agreed  on this already.

Nodding her head a bit, she licked her lips before glancing over back towards her bedroom.

"You are welcome to stay in there. I don't mind sleeping on the couch."

And she didn't. It must have been forever since he slept in an actual bed, and she didn't want to keep  that opportunity from him.

"Would you like another sandwich? I have enough for one more left, i think."

One sandwich was more than he would ask for, his regular fare what he could pilfer from gas stations and nonperishable aisles of family grocery stores. There were still a few cans of vegetables in the bottom of his bag from his last trip. Once the sandwich was placed within his reach, he eyed it with the same scrutiny he gave to anything associated with her. Peripheral observation had told him nothing suspicious had been done to it, and she had made her own from the same containers. A second’s hesitation, allowing her to take a bit first, and he deemed it acceptable, reached over to bring it into his lap as he continued to scroll pages on his computer.

It was gone in three bites and less than a minute, and he leaned down once finished to withdraw a can of green beans from his pack. Barely taking his eyes from the screen in front of him, he pulled a knife from his hip, punctured the lip edge, and peeled it back with two bionic fingers. With the ease of practise, he hardly spilled a drop, and brought it close to drink at the contents as casually as though they were a can of beer.

"I’ll stay here with you," he informed her a moment later, as the song changed and he tapped a key to turn its volume down. Conversation was welcome now, if only briefly. "I’ll sleep here." With his eyes, he indicated the spot his backpack now occupied, slumped against the couch next to his feet.

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"I don't usually allow  anyone and everyone  to stay in my apartment so I must ask you to be more specific."

“Technically speaking? (      she narrowed her gaze in on the stranger      )                                  …Anyone and e v e r y o n e.”

[oldstephblog-blog]

"If it's not too personal, when did you start working for SHIELD?"

She was curious to say the least. She didn't seem like a SHIELD agent. Or at least not like any of the SHIELD  agents she has met in the past.

                         { Skye nodded with a smile. }

            ❝ Oh and I hope that you             don’t mind me ‘escorting' you             I’m only Level 1 — but a very             proud one. ❞

[oldstephblog-blog]

"I know."

She sighed a bit while taking a seat next to her.

"After waking up after  seventy years, I couldn't sleep for weeks. Everyone has demons from their pasts. They are hard to shake, but they can't control you unless you let them."

"Who did this to you?" -iwontfightyou

            ❝ No one. I’m fine. You            don’t need to worry with me. ❞

[oldstephblog-blog]

"All right, Peggy." 

Steph couldn't force her to  allow her to stay. If she felt uncomfortable in her presence she had to leave. 

She didn't want to leave, but she would. All she wanted to do was make her happy. 

Standing tall, she grabbed her jacket off of the back of her  chair and took a step away  from her. There was a sad look in her eyes as she studied the woman one last time. 

"I'm sorry for bothering you."

                Her small fragile reached out to the                 woman in front of her. More tears seemed                 to be rolling down her face before pulling                 her hand back as fast as she can.   

                          ❝ Please… Leave me alone.                               Please stop this.❞

[oldstephblog-blog]

His office was the first place Stephanie planned on looking. However, she didn't quite know where his office was.

Although, she was quite interested in her work, so she made the split second decision to stay. 

"I understand. I probably wouldn't be much of help anyway."

She smiled a bit whilst taking another step inside to examine her work.

"What are you working on?"

     ”Well, Agent Coulson is up in his office, and I don’t need help, but you’re welcome to stay if you’re interested in watching me work… not that you couldn’t help, because I’m sure that you could, but there’s not much-“

[oldstephblog-blog]

"I know I shouldn't bother you-"

But she was still there. She should have left by now, but she was still standing there. 

"But would you like to talk about it?"

Open

         —Clint gave a little nod at her words and lent against the railing, staring at the night sky and the moon shining brightly. “It is.” He agreed quietly, turning his attention back to her. “I’m sorry. Shouldn’t snap at you. I’m just in a.. mood, I guess.”

[oldstephblog-blog]

"I had a little help with that. Why didn't you want anyone to find you, Nat? I was worried about you."

open

      “Aside from some bruised ribs, I’m fine.                                                                                             —— -How…did you find me? I made it pretty hard for anyone to track me.”

[oldstephblog-blog]

"Oh."

That was more than she  was asking for, but she  was glad for it. This wouldn't be the first time she woke  up in a hospital bed with no recollection of the night before. 

"Like my head is going to explode."

b e a t b e a t b e a t

[oldstephblog-blog]

She saves everyone else,

                                  but  n o   o n e  saves her.

[oldstephblog-blog]

but the things that ruined you, loved you too 

[oldstephblog-blog]

It lives forever within the depths of constantly changing matter, only morhping from one form to another. — Valentin Kataev, "My diamond crown"

[oldstephblog-blog]

"I miss you." -iwontfightyou

Send me “I miss you” to know what my muse will say after 1 year, 5 years, then to 10 years after your muse’s death.one year: You’re an idiot. You should’ve…should’ve let me handle them! I…God, I could have done something. I could have saved you. Don’t say that there was nothing I could have done, because I could have moved faster, knocked you down: had it been me who took the shot instead of you. You deserve to be here, living life to your fullest. You deserved to be happy on this world. Not me, Steve. I know it. I don’t belong here, not without you.five years: The nightmares finally stopped. But not really. Sometimes, I feel like I’m living in one. I know, cheesy. You’re probably upset too, that I’m being so…upset about this and not really moving on. Well, tell me, buddy. What would you have done if I bit the dust? I don’t even want to think about it because I would’ve told you not to mope when I was haunting your room. You probably are telling me the same thing, but hell if I’ll listen to you. There’s a big hole in my heart, Steve, that tore out when you…died…and they say to listen to your heart, don’t they? ten years: I miss you. Maybe we’ll see each other again, if God bears witness to me suffering through all this and thinks hell for eternity is enough. Ha. Anyways. I think I have all my memories back now, Steve. I never got to tell you this before you…you died, but I’ll say it now, so you better be listening. I mean, maybe you inferred from my actions since actions do speak louder than words sometimes, but…I love you, Stevie. I might’ve been the one helping you when we were kids, but you were the one who made me…better. Happier. And then you saved my ass more times than I’d like to count. I still owe you for being the one man to heal my mind, more than some shrink ever could. Since your…death, it’s been unraveling a bit. My mind, that is. But…I’ll keep going. Keep fighting and living for you. 

[oldstephblog-blog]

//I have drafts on here I still need to do. But I have to pass out.

Like for a starter maybe?

[oldstephblog-blog]

Will your Muse try to make them remember? Were they trying to get this to happen? 

Send me a "Who?" and my Muse will forget yours.

[oldstephblog-blog]

She knew this day would come eventually, but no  matter how much she  mentally prepared herself for it, she wasn't ready. 

Who would be? She was  watching someone she  truly cared for wither  away before her eyes, and there wasn't anything she could do about it. 

It was tearing her up inside. Every thought in her mind  was telling her to fix it-  convince her- but at this  point she was beyond  convincing and it made her feel completely helpless.

"I am."

           ❝ No… No…            You can’t be…❞