oc-disaster-central - Tumblr blog

oc-disaster-central · 2 years

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So a new OC spawned and decided to highjack an old throw-away idea... here's the result.

Hey, how ya doin? I'm doing miserably. Why? Doesn't matter. My name also doesn't matter. What does matter is that I'm here to "talk" about my experience with dating all the wrong people because my best friend, who shall also remain anonymous, recently realized I've dated exactly 26 different people whose names all start with a different letter. In other words, here's a list of my misadventures in alphabetical order.

Alex

• Butch lesbian I met while hunting.

• Found out she was racist three weeks later.

• I was 26

Brain

• The jock who was "secretly" a gamer boy...

• He was also gay & used me to go for my twin brother...

• Sweet 16~

Chelsea

• ...

• Took years before I admitted she was gaslighting me...

• 27~28

Daphne

• Sweet and classically feminine.

• Actually nice, she was my beard for almost a year.

• 30-31

Elizabeth

• Book worm and really into D&D

• Tried it for a bit to figure out if we liked girls (I did, she didn't)

• We were 17

Francis

• He was cute and liked my hair

• Only realized I was a girl after two months...

• 14 was awkward

George

• Unironic femboy who was really good at math

• Changed colleges & didn't want long distance dating

• 23

Helen

• She was really into space and history...

• She was REALLY into Astrology and Greek Mythology!

• 34

Isaac

• Neither of us wanted to be alone for the holidays.

• His crush came to his senses, we're still friends actually!

• 40

Jacob

• I needed a break

• He was looking for a notch in his bealt

• 19 was a mistake

Kathryn

• She was cute and asked me out.

• Found out she was dating me because of a dare

• 17 (post Elizabeth)

Luke

• They needed a plus one for a party & we actually had fun

• One of my few relationships that wasn't a mess

• 25

Mariah

• Worked at the Starbucks on campus, gave me her nu

• Used me to make her boss hot & bothered (he was married)

• 23 (post Gorge)

Natalie

• English major with a cute accent and a dog

• The dog was neglected until she wanted to show off

• 22

Oscar

• ...

• Dumped me AT the alter

• 36~39

Phil

• Coworkers pushed us together cause we had shitty exs

• Lasted a month before their shitty ex showed up

• 42

Qurtny

• I had a far off crush for a bit before I asked her out

• I was a rebound for her girlfriend who died...

• 19 (pre Jacob)

Reilly

• Transferred in & was kinda like a puppy

• Was also divorced with three kids & a habit of cheating

• 41

Stephen

•

• He wanted kids, and I couldn't give him that...

• 44~50

Taylor

• They were cute, funny and in my study group

• They were also "dating" six other people at once

• 22 (post Natalie)

Uaine

• Transfer student my family fostered for the year

• My parents found out~

• 18

Victoria

• We met at the support group and slowly grew close

• Her ex took offense at that and attacked her... she died.

• 31

Walter

• Flirted with me for almost a year before asking me

• Ghosted me two months in~

• 27 (pre Chelsea)

Xavier

• Met at the work Christmas party and clicked

• Mama's boy dumped me after a meet family dinner~

• 34-35 (post Helen)

Yanni

• Really enthusiastic about his heritage and eager to share

• Also kinda sexest, but not intentionally?

• 34 (pre Helen)

Zach

• Animal lover who was highly allergic to most animals

• Bought into Peta's bullshit

• 20

#this was not what I expected when I went to organize my notes #New OC who dis?#this was supposed to be fluff and crack #a funny Ha-Ha What If Someone's Dating History Looked Like An Out-of-Order Alphabet Song?#waking up was a mistake #OC things #writing?#I guess?

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