not-as-bad-as-it-looks-blog

[not-as-bad-as-it-looks-blog]

...bros before--

[...long pause]

Fuck it, I can't think of a damn thing to say there that'll make sense, BROS BEFORE HOES, BARTON I SAID IT YOU OWE ME FIFTY BUCKS [FLEES]

…Bros before, what now, Tony?

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[just...stares at her for a bit] Uh.

[clears throat] If you're worried, no, I didn't think it was a bad idea. I can't speak for Tasha or Clint, but--we were all pretty excited. This is gonna sound terrible, but--if Bruce trusted himself to take care of a little girl, then he was already lightyears ahead of where he was a few years ago, and that's--well, always a good thing.

[smiles slightly] But no. If you're asking if we regretted it for a second, at any time, the answer's no. [...eyes narrow] Who implied we did?

Uncle Tony?

We don’t speak of the burned noodles, and—[raises an eyebrow] Of course I do. But since I”m pretty sure you’re not planning on adopting a kid anytime soon, and I’m not Ororo, I have no idea where this is going. Enlighten me?

…you’re not planning on adopting, right. Right?

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We don't speak of the burned noodles, and--[raises an eyebrow] Of course I do. But since I"m pretty sure you're not planning on adopting a kid anytime soon, and I'm not Ororo, I have no idea where this is going. Enlighten me?

...you're not planning on adopting, right. Right?

Uncle Tony?

[snorts] Strawbs, maybe—[blinks] Well, duh, ask away. [puts down tools, see how focused I’m being]

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[snorts] Strawbs, maybe--[blinks] Well, duh, ask away. [puts down tools, see how focused I'm being]

Uncle Tony?

In here, kiddo—[shuts off blowtorch, pulls off goggles, grinning] Whatcha need?

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In here, kiddo--[shuts off blowtorch, pulls off goggles, grinning] Whatcha need?

Uncle Tony?

[Knocks quietly on the lab door] Anyone in here?

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Chatzyvengers story arc: Poison Plot.

Ten years after Bruce Banner adopts the little girl from Calcutta, life is going relatively good for those in Avengers Tower. The danger and the tension is ever present—but that’s what they have Shanta Banner for, to ease up the tension. What they are unaware of, however, is the activity of an assassination company known as the ‘Trojan Forces’—and their plans to pick off the ‘weaker’ members of the Avengers. Their main operative, a woman named Poisona. She befriends the youngest Banner and uses her as a ploy to get somewhat close to Tony—her first target. She succeeds in slowly poisoning him in secret, but she wasn’t counting on the chemicals in Tony’s reactor to mesh with the poison. Instead of killing him, it begins to paralyze, while simultaneously creating a build up of deadly toxins within the reactor. Unsure of what is causing the poisoning, Tony keeps it a secret. When a battle in New York starts to go wrong, and Tony’s health takes a nose dive mid-flight, he urges Shanta to take the reactor out of his chest and use it as a weapon—he knows her mutation allows her to utilize poison, and it is a last resort. His “last wish” is that she save lives and make him proud. Shanta, reluctantly does so, telling him to wait for her, and that she’ll be back with his reactor as fast as she can. SHIELD find Tony, completely paralyzed and near death, and move him to a life-preservation unit, keeping him in a state of ‘living death’/Stasis. When Shanta returns, all that is left of Tony is a pool of blood, and the Iron Man helmet, which is now unresponsive. She is horrified, believing that she has killed her uncle, and subsequently runs away in fear. The next five years, there is a man hunt for whoever poisoned Iron Man, and a frantic search for the reactor. In the meantime, SHIELD have been slowly draining the poison from Tony, and he eventually reaches a condition stable enough (with the help of one of his old reactors) that they can bring him out of stasis. His first question: what happened while he was unconscious. He is alarmed to hear that Bruce left the Avengers, and is shattered when he learns that Shanta “died” in an explosion. He goes looking for Bruce, and finds his friend embittered, and as full of rage and grief as ever. Meanwhile, Black Widow and Hawkeye have been investigating—searching for Tony’s reactor in the hopes that it could lead them back to whoever wanted Tony dead. They find a pattern….a series of murders in various places around the world, Those murders were all contacts of one ‘Trojan Force’ and are all leading to…Poisona. So, Natasha and Clint follow this lead. And they are faced with the murderer—someone called ‘Blood Bullet’. They are surprised to see that Blood Bullet has the reactor—and when they tell the others, Tony’s face drains of all colour. The last person to have the reactor was Shanta. Convinced that she isn’t dead, and that she is behind all these deaths, he goes after her, tracking her down to Brazil and confronting her while still in the suit. She isn’t aware he’s really Tony, and attacks him, nearly suffocating with poisonous gases inside the suit when he finally lifts the face plate up. And then they really get to see what happened to each other; Tony, shaken by his sudden jump forward in time, and Shanta, broken beyond belief by her guilt and full of vengeful rage. Tony tries to bring her home, but she has other ideas. Her aim is to find Poisona, and kill her. “You said make you proud, well, Stark. I’ll fuckin’ well do that.”

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...one, Goa never happened, two, WHAT DO YOU DO ON ROAD TRIPS?!

…Sometimes, I wonder if my dad would be disappointed by what I do on road trips. Then things like this happen.

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*squeezes her hand back* *whispering* They should be on their way, sweetheart. Uncle Jarvis is already calling. Stay by me, we'll--it'll be fine. 

themaliciousanon asked you: [Thankful that Ross deleted all information in the databases on him, to save himself from public scandal] *Outside in the corridor* MISS BANNER? COME OUT, DARLING. YOUR MAMA IS WAITING FOR YOU.

*tenses* …Shanta, stay under the desk unless I tell you otherwise, alright?

…Jarvis, send up a suit, will you?

[not-as-bad-as-it-looks-blog]

themaliciousanon asked you: [Thankful that Ross deleted all information in the databases on him, to save himself from public scandal] *Outside in the corridor* MISS BANNER? COME OUT, DARLING. YOUR MAMA IS WAITING FOR YOU.

*tenses* ...Shanta, stay under the desk unless I tell you otherwise, alright?

...Jarvis, send up a suit, will you?

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...Shanta, honey--*puts a hand on her hair, starting a lockdown of the more important tower floors--labs, and the Avengers levels* Stay close to me, okay? Don't--go running off on your own. *sends a short message to Bruce's phone--back to the tower now*

Jarvis, get a suit ready, will you? *already pulling on homing bracelets, typing up a search for anyone associated with Bruce Banner by the name of 'Emil B.'*

I don't know, kid, but I'm sure we'll find out. 

*blinks, and suddenly this got serious fast*

…weirdy man—who? *mentally running through a list: Bruce’s friends, and Bruce’s “friends.” Short list on the first one…not so short on the second.* *doesn’t stand or crouch down next to her, continues working just as normal, voice low.* What did he look like, kiddo? And—quieter. Please. *pulls out a tablet, starts tapping commands to Jarvis. This could be nothing—but the bruises say otherwise.*

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*blinks, and suddenly this got serious fast*

...weirdy man--who? *mentally running through a list: Bruce's friends, and Bruce's "friends." Short list on the first one...not so short on the second.* *doesn't stand or crouch down next to her, continues working just as normal, voice low.* What did he look like, kiddo? And--quieter. Please. *pulls out a tablet, starts tapping commands to Jarvis. This could be nothing--but the bruises say otherwise.*

not-as-bad-as-it-looks replied to your post.

What are you doing in here and why are you shaking.

*Breathless from the run*

THERESAWEIRDYMANOUTSIDEHESAYSHE’SDADDY’SFRIEND

*Bruises on her wrists from being grabbed* GOTTAHIDEGOTTAHIDEGOTTAHIDE

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"I SWEAR IT WAS NOT ME" Mmmhm. What'd you do now, and how hard did Pepper's heels hit you?

…I felt like I should just come with a general disclaimer, don’t judge me.

hard enough to bruise

[not-as-bad-as-it-looks-blog]

Hey, guys, guess what.

PUTTING A SOURCE ON THIS IS GREAT.

SERIOUSLY, GUYS, NOT OKAY.

Do you know what I like the most here? They’re women and they ARE NOT wearing super sexualized leather clothes or posing in impossible ways.

And, of course, the Captain America 40’s hair.

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...I'm sorry, I wasn't under the impression that I had to give you anything. 

Someone help.

[not-as-bad-as-it-looks-blog]

((GRUMPSBAND?!?!?? FUQ U TOO))

((This is my Grumpsband. EDUARDO IS THE ONLY REASON I STICK AROUND ;-;))