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noblesandsstories · 3 months ago

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As always if you see any grammatical errors or tags I might have missed, please let me know.

Pale Pastels: A Crypt to Creep In

Astarion x Original Fem!Tav

->Hijinks ensue, mentions of traps, violence against skeletons, Fleur stabs herself, she's doing her best guys, Astarion's only been here a few minutes and he's fed up, oh hey there's plot guys! (At least in spirit), we're starting the slow burn here, kinda.

Border by: @adornedwithlight

AN: Calliope herself spoke through me, this had around 200 words when I started and this baby is at around 1,600. Hope y'all enjoy, starting to set up pieces of Fleur's stat block and a bit of her and Astarion's dynamic. Oh and I've never really wrote combat before, hope it wasn't too much of a pain to read. Bon appetite.

This temple was a great idea, decent loot, especially looting the bandits camp after Fleur sprinted up to them, frantically going on and on about mindflayers eating people. They didn’t stick around long after that, and it took the trio left hiding in the bushes a lot to not burst out into laughter at her performance of a woman who witnessed untold horrors.

Overall a rather good experience.

The group had found a book that had some kind of magical seal on it. Gale was fascinated with it, trying to break the spell desperately. Astarion only rolled his eyes.

We could be here a while, he thought. He slipped out of the room, hoping to find some kind of loot, or at least something to pick at while he was bored.

What he did find was a room full of tombs, with more traps than he’d seen in a long time.

Must be something very worthwhile here, better get to work. The elf pulled out his tools and carefully stepped over to the closest sarcophagus and began picking at the lock. Just as he opened it he turned his head to check over the room…

Just in time to see Fleur about to step on a pressure plate.

“DON’T.”

She froze, looking at him with wide eyes, foot suspended in the air.

“Can’t you see there’s traps everywhere?” He hissed.

To her credit, she did look like she was carefully observing when she double checked the room, but when she turned back to him, her face held a sheepish smile.

“No,” she said apologetically.

Astarion sighed. “Why are you even in here?”

“Same as you I recon. Watching Gale try to open a book that doesn’t want to be opened is extremely boring. Figured you’d at least be entertaining to stand next to.”

Astarion really didn’t want the company. But he knew he needed to start playing his cards carefully, lest he wanted to end up in dire straits. For now, playing nice with the candied bard would probably be a benefit.

“Fine, but take a step back and let me guide you over. There’s not many floor traps, but I can bet that they’re all synced up to one another.”

She dutifully obeyed, and he made his way over carefully.

“Ok, now watch my feet.” He over dramatized his steps, going slowly, and one by one, but in the interest of not learning what these traps do, he’d greatly look as foolish as he’d need to. Fleur diligently followed his movements, eyes analyzing every slight angle, until he was certain she was far enough from the main plates to do much harm.

“Now, sit tight and don’t do something stupid, darling,” he drawled in his usual flirty tone.

Fleur just gave a bright smile, “I’ll do my best.”

Astarion turned back to the sarcophagus, poking his head in, finally. A few pieces of gold. Not bad. He moved on to the next one. He heard the light footsteps as he knelt for the next one.

They made their way through the room, coffin by coffin, even found a chest with some basic loot, Astarion dutifully working on the locks, Fleur quietly observing. Honestly, Astarion found it rather nice.

Until Gale and Shadowheart walked in.

“We figured the book out!” Gale exclaimed. Astarion thought he looked like a dog trying to impress it’s master, poor bastard.

“Don’t walk in!” Fleur called out. “This place is trapped up.”

Shadowheart just cocked her head. “Yes, it’s very obvious there are traps here. Thanks for the warning.”

Fleur only looked a little bashful when she replied, “We’re almost done here. Go on and we’ll catch up!”

The two moved on and Astarion quickly picked the last lock. He fished out the last of the loot (a few pieces of gold and a healing potion), and stood.

“Now to get you and I out of this room safely, my dear,” he crooned.

“Do you mind if I do something first? Promise won’t be too bad,” she asked.

“Of course, as long as you don’t stab me,” he gave a careless laugh. She didn’t seem like the type to do something, right?

She stepped up and straightened his collar, fidgeting with it for a second, before giving a nod.

“That should work for now. At least you can pretend like it’s a weirdly placed mole.”

If Astarion’s heart could stop, it would have then.

She knew she knew she knew she-

“We do need to find a higher collar if we don’t want someone stabbing before asking,” she looked up to him with a beaming smile. “Now let’s get going. Don’t want them thinking we’re going to elope. You might have to show the way out though. I still don’t see those traps.”

She didn’t care. Or she was behaving like she didn’t care. Astarion couldn’t follow.

And it quickly left his line of concerns when he noticed Fleur almost step on a trap, again.

“WAIT-”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They met back up and found a more open room, that they began to move through, spreading out slightly. Astarion did his best to follow Fleur’s every move, but not to keep her from setting off traps and getting them all blown to Avernus. But to follow her eyes.

Eyes that couldn’t see a pressure plate that was quite obvious but could catch bite marks on his neck. Eyes that shone a rather beautiful shade of blue. Actually, now that he looked at it, something was off about her eyes. What could be-

“Hey, what do you think this button does?” Fleur asked, turning to Astarion.

“Opening the door next to it, I assume,” he responded.

“Then why the button,” she mused. “Why not just have the door, like everywhere else.” She paused for a moment, then turned back to the other two, “Move closer for a bit. I’m going to push this and I’d rather have heads where I can see them.”

Astarion snickered, “Sounds like you’re talking to children.”

Fleur sent him a weak smile, “I’m more used to that than talking to adults. Brace yourselves.”

She pushed the button, and as he predicted, the door opened.

What he didn’t predict was the skeletons strewn about the room to get up.

“Oh shit,” Fleur whispered.

The battle, if you could even call it that, began. Astarion moved forward, deciding that the bow was the best course of action for now. The skeletons were far, and he highly doubt he’d get too close without something horrible happening. He shot one on the ledge above them dead on, staggering it slightly.

A slew of spells slung their way, a firebolt hitting Shadowheart and a ray of frost, which he managed to only be nicked by. Before much else could progress, Fleur channeled a bit of magic, and without warning…

“Even alive, you must have smelled like something rotten.”

The skeleton above them fell into pieces, a bit of excitement fueling him. They definitely could stomp these things.

Another skeleton ran forwards, getting a good hit on Shadowheart. She hit him back, adding an extra shove with the shield as Gale cast firebolt, sending flames to one of the skeletons further back in the room. The skeleton furthest back began casting before everything went quiet.

Silence, how marvelous. And I’m surrounded by casters.

He ran around the group and the skeleton challenging Shadowheart, aiming at the one holding up the spell, and launched an arrow. The fucker didn’t fall, and the spell stayed strong.

Another lobby of spells came their way from the other two skeletons, hitting Gale and Fleur this time. With the silence up, he wasn’t expecting much. Fleur ran up next to the skeleton in front of them, and raised up a dagger.

And brought it down with the worst form he’d ever seen, not just missing the skeleton by a wide berth, but cutting herself in the process.

Astarion wasn’t even sure he had seen it quite right, until the blood trickled down her arm. If it wasn’t for the silence spell, he’d be yelling so loud, he could probably do damage. How do you fuck up that poorly?

He didn’t miss Shadowheart’s eye roll and she swung again with the mace, this time seeming to do slightly more than the last.

Someone had to, he bitterly thought, as sprinted to move out of the radius of the spell, before casting his own back to the skeleton that was holding up the silence spell. This time the creature fell, and with it the spell. He wasted no time turning around, pulling out his rapier and finishing off the brute.

“Since he’s now dead, let’s try sticking to things that are useful?” he sneered.

If looks could kill, Astarion would be dead again from the glare Fleur sent him, but she said nothing, instead braced herself for the ice spell sent her way. Another spell was slung to him, but he managed to easily dodge it.

Shadowheart sent some kind of holy spell to one of the skeletons, downing it instantly. Gale casted another small flash of fire to the other one, which Astarion finished off with an arrow.

They waited a beat, seeing if anything else would rise from the coffins around them, but once it proved still, they all began put their things away.

Astarion turned over to Fleur. “What’s the point in having a dagger if you don’t know how to use it?”

“Listen, Mr. Snark, not everyone is built for combat,” she huffed. “If anything, I’m just glad it wasn’t worse.”

Astarion had never really noticed the pouch at her hip, and when she opened it, he noticed it was a set of daggers, most of them designed for throwing. They were well polished, and carefully shined. But that wasn’t nearly the detail that caught his eye the most.

What caught his eye was one of the larger daggers was missing.

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