nightvale359

[nightvale359]

This is so stupid but like ok so there’s a character I’m super into. Like he’s so sexy I struggle to watch the movie he’s in because gawd dayum. But I (gay dude) am seriously struggling to imagine sexy time with him because his aura is so suffocatingly straight. Like man I’m trying to imagine him up my ass and I just can’t. He wouldn’t. He’s so goddamn heterosexual. The vibes are straighter than a ruler. This man is the most cisgender, heterosexual, heteroromantic being ever to graze the internet and I can’t even fuck him in my mind without going “he would not fucking say do that”. It’s a skill issue on my part but I can’t help it. He feels infinitely more homophobic than even bi-curious. Girl help

w.what am I supposed to do about this. hello.

[nightvale359]

not doomed by the narrative but saved by the narrative. yeah i know you'd rather die than keep suffering but the story doesn't actually care what you want. you have to keep going, even when it hurts. even being erased from existence won't stop you from being salvaged from the wreckage of un-being. get up. keep pushing. keep bleeding. keep living.

[nightvale359]

I’m telling you everytime I see Hiccup tell his dad, “For once in your life would you please just listen to me?” I FUCKING CRY.

Like I get it. For once just listen to me.

[nightvale359]

DRAGONS DRAGONS DRAGONS DRAGONS AAAAAAA

[nightvale359]

warren kepler..................................

[nightvale359]

Survival Tip No.714

Remember your ABCs – Always Be Critical.

[nightvale359]

woe pissed off Jacobi be upon ye

[nightvale359]

Okay so from what i’ve seen online. Is the takeaway supposed to be that Maddie was right and Owen can transition still?

Tbh Im confused cause like. Yea Owen baby transition. But Maddie could use some psych help and you might want some too. Because your life cant be a tv show?? But it seems i’m the only person who has this thought

Okay okay imma watch I saw the tv glow this better not make me cry i swear

[nightvale359]

[season 3b]

stiles: *writing in his diary in a glitter pen* I'm losing my sense of humanity

[nightvale359]

Its so funny to me that child me so desperately wanted to be Dean Winchester but didn’t understand that was possible so I thought I just had a crush on him.

Like I deadass was like, “Okay his favorite food is burgers and pie so now those are my favorite too. I’m now going to listen to a lot of classic rock too cause ✨Similar Interests✨.”

Like baby. THE SIGNS WERE THERE.

[nightvale359]

Ooo I get it. Pink opaque to Owen is what Supernatural was to me.

[nightvale359]

Oh this is too real what the fuck

Okay okay imma watch I saw the tv glow this better not make me cry i swear

[nightvale359]

Okay okay imma watch I saw the tv glow this better not make me cry i swear

[nightvale359]

Survival Tip No.426

When in space, fire is one of those “only when absolutely necessary” solutions.

[nightvale359]

"Ok, ma'am that'll be $226.03."

I take my wallet out of my pocket and unfold it. It is empty other than a single moth that lazily flies out. The moth lands on the tap point of the card reader. There's a beat, and my payment is processed. The moth flies back into my wallet and I put it back in my pocket.

[nightvale359]

Why was younger me like obsessed with Lucio and think that his route was like. The best.

It is not the best. Literally in every other side of the story you don’t even try to be better you’re just an asshole.

I do love a good “Oh i’m fucked actually. I’ve fucked up a lot. I need to do better.” Story. Thats why I love Eiffel. So like.

It’s not awful. Just not as great as I remember

[nightvale359]

’mr spider wants more’ mr spider should shut the fuck up and mind his manners. heck, if someone gave me their literal SON i would sure as hell say think you. mr spider is an ungrateful bitch.