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Do You Even Thrive?

Just a quick update.

So i disappeared, due to illnesses, mentally and physically and it took me a bit to find my groove back. the good news is, I only gained 5 lbs back, so that’s  bonus. Everytime I tried to restart, I couldn’t find the energy or even the proper motivation, then my sister in law found this new product. I paid attention because she’s so skeptical about any kind of supplements but she couldn’t stop raving about Thrive. I read up on it, only saw good things so I messaged her and she got me a sample. It was 4 days and that 4 days turned me into a believer. I can’t even explain it all... I mean I could but I would go on for hours and after my workout, I’m ready to pass out.

Yup, I’ve made my return to the gym. I ended up signing up for Thrive, got it Friday, started it Saturday and am already feeling better and more energized so I hit up the gym after work and was just going so hard that I’m positive I won’t be able to walk tomorrow, but this is supposed to assist in faster recovery.

I will go more into this, don’t worry but I just wanted to give a quick update. I urge you to check out the video at least and see for yourself.

http://harmoniann.le-vel.com/

and if you’re ready for any one of these, shoot me a msg and ask me how to start thriving :D

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So I know a lot of people post gym etiquette stuff, like what to do, what not to do. (Like talk loudly on your phone) but this is something different…

Here’s the thing. I applaud every single person that goes to the gym to get healthy and better themselves. I mean, go you, kick some ass, you got...

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a little gym etiquette

So I know a lot of people post gym etiquette stuff, like what to do, what not to do. (Like talk loudly on your phone) but this is something different...

Here’s the thing. I applaud every single person that goes to the gym to get healthy and better themselves. I mean, go you, kick some ass, you got this!!!! I don’t care what you look like because you’re there and that’s awesome, you’re lapping all those people on the couch.

But here’s my issue: the people who are working out and making fun of other people working out. Let me expand on that- I am a bigger girl, smaller than when I first started but still larger. That’s okay, because guess what, I go to Koyabell and the gym to get healthy, so I understand it’s not an overnight fix and yay for me for working on bettering myself. I’m not the only person there on the large side and when I’m at the gym, I see these other people on one of the cardio machines huffing and puffing and looking almost embarrassed by this fact but all I can think is ‘Good for you.’ I know it’s not easy to start or keep going. When I started, i couldn’t go on the bike for more than 5 minutes without wanting to cry. I get upset that they look embarrassed by this because it’s almost like they don’t realize how strong and awesome they are, that I am, that we all are.

But as I walk past the cardio machines and head towards the free weights and the likes, I can feel these eyes following me. The people on the cardio machines wondering why I would dare go over into that section, that section is for the ‘other people.’ You know the ones, the ones that either need to build muscle or are completely jacked already and according to everyone else, they belong there. Like there’s some visible line in the gym. If you want to build muscle or get more jacked you stay on the right side of the gym but if you’re a bigger person and need to lose weight, you get to the cardio machines and don’t you even think about crossing over. It’s a huge misconception that if you need to lose weight you should only be doing cardio, not true, ahh, but I digress.... back to the invisible line.

This line is there, and anyone needs to cross it to get to the bathrooms and whenever i did, I would get this look from people, like ‘why are you here?’ and it bugged me, but when I first started going back to the gym, I was the cardio people. Hanging out on that side and using all the cable machines when I did weights as I did a lot of biking at the beginning, not for weight loss alone, but also to help my knees because they were really sore at the time. And if I crossed that line and get the looks, I would put my head down and slunk past because really, why was I there? It took some time to realize that I was there to better myself and to quit slinking past them.

Then my brother gave me this awesome workout and that would mean I would have to do the unthinkable and go into the free weights section (ohhh scary) But again, I had a goal, I wanted this to work, I was going to kick ass at this and really, since I learned all this years ago, I already knew how to do a lot of these exercises properly (I was one class away from being a certified personal trainer, once upon a time but that’s another story) so guess what, free weights people,even if I didn’t know anything, I still had a right to be there!!

I ignored all the looks at first, and that was fine because these people that were giving me the looks were doing some of the exercises wrong... (Why are you doing the lat pulldown behind your head? why oh why???) but I kept at it. Then I noticed these people, weren’t just giving me looks, they were openly staring at me. Then when i went to do an overhead press one night, they started laughing behind their hands. At first I was like, okay, am i doing it wrong? but no, checked my form and everything, even checked a youtube video to make sure I wasn’t missing anything important just because for some reason I was still a little paranoid, don’t ask me why. So when I went to go do my next set, I noticed them laughing again and one of them whispered something to his friend and pointed at me, not me specifically but my arms. I was wearing a tank top and doing that exercise, my overly fat arms were in plain view for all to see. And they were laughing... then they went off to do lat pulldowns all wrong and making me cringe. I’m sure if they weren’t laughing, i would’ve been nice and have told them why that’s not beneficial:) but I continued on with the workout and as I went on, I was just getting more and more annoyed. I mean, how dare they! What right do they have? What right does anyone have to make fun of anyone because they’re at the gym working out.

So all you Cardio people that were afraid to cross that line, you remember, you’re awesome, you keep working and you forget the looks and whatever else is going on and you step over that line and grab some weights and work your ass off. Don’t be self conscious, don‘t feel like you shouldn’t be there, just go and do it. Remember, you have a right to be there, you have a right to learn some exercises and try them out without being ridiculed because you’re not already at your goal. I mean, why else are you there??? to reach your goal!!!

and if you’re someone who already thinks they’re fit and that people who are overweight or not fit yet don’t belong on ‘your’ side. Quit being a dick, plain and simple. Just quit it. Don’t laugh, be nice, hell even an encouraging smile is nice.

We’re all there for a reason, so keep the judging to yourself.

I must say though, the best part about that whole experience??? Leaving and seeing those same people smoking outside... good one.

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I’ve been so quiet….

People must’ve thought I’ve given up and gone back to my old ways. Why not? it’s happened before.

But really, I was sick. There’s this really nasty bug going around up in my part of the world and I fought so hard against it. I put up a valiant effort really but then stress...

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You can’t say that you don’t have time because you have to make the time. I haven’t had to come to the gym at five am in a while, but it’s the only time I will have to workout today so here goes. 💪

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I’m still here!

I’ve been so quiet....

People must’ve thought I’ve given up and gone back to my old ways. Why not? it’s happened before. 

But really, I was sick. There’s this really nasty bug going around up in my part of the world and I fought so hard against it. I put up a valiant effort really but then stress from wrestling as well as stuff happening at home and almost not getting to go on my trip next month pushed me over the edge, that flu took hold and I didn’t know how I was going to get through. I get sick and I’m a big baby about it but I go on through life as normal. I still go to work, I still do what I have to but this hit me and I was down and out. I finally got 3 days off in a row from work so i was all ‘great, I’m gonna hit up Koyabell 2 days this week, maybe squeeze in a double, get lots of food prep done.’ Nope, I woke up briefly, then went back to sleep for pretty much all three days. I went through a whole bottle of nyquil and a pack of benilyn. I had to return to work on Saturday because I had to train and there was no one else to do it and it was a huge mistake. Basically It knocked me down for the last couple weeks and as a result, I haven’t worked out.

It affected me... when I was at the gym and biking, i finally got relief in my knees from the pain. but not going brought the pain back and my god did it hurt, it was like new knee pain all over again. I couldn’t wait to feel better, meaning walk 100m without doubling over and wanting to pass out and being able to stay away for more than 3 hours at a time, so I could go back to the gym as I had a new workout I wanted to try.

My baby bro, (he’ll always be my baby bro) is a Kinesiologist and when I started going to the gym, I knew I needed help. It had been a while and I needed help with lower body exercises, since I was unsure of what would be best with my horrendous knees. So I asked him for some ideas and since he’s so frickin awesome, he went above and beyond and wrote me a whole 2 day split and I was really excited to try it as he did say it would help burn fat and build muscle.

Finally it happened and I got to go back on Friday. so I hopped on the bike and could barely make it 15 minutes. so i figured it was best to give me a couple days to get back in the swing of things before i tackle my new workout. Sunday I felt the energy to give it a try and i did my brother’s workout.

I’m pretty sure he’s trying to kill me. :D In a good way of course. It was tough and painful but I did the whole thing. i finished it off with the bike, tabata style. I researched it first, having never heard of it and it is the most intense thing ever. seriously, look it up. you may think it’s no big deal but go ahead, try it out. i hit 6 rounds. I knew if i did the last 2, I was going to puke and well, I can’t handle puke at all. A few hours later and I already hurt, I’m afraid to sleep, it’s going to hurt when I wake up :( But I will definitely try day 2 on Monday... if I can walk.

While sick, I lost 4 lbs, yay, I am 7 lbs away from my first milestone and I want to do it before my Vegas trip April 11. and I’m really hoping that I hit it. I think with my brother’s new workout I’ll be able to do it. So thanks Iggi :)

I start back at Koyabell on Wednesday and I actually can’t wait :)

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Dash is dead.

Active healthy fitblrs, please reblog so I can check your blog out!

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some history...

So this is my journey but before we really get started, it's important to learn who I am and my why's. Coach Rish has always emphasized the importance of our why's. Why are we here? Why are we doing this? There are many why's but there is one that is really simple. I was tired. Tired of feeling the way I felt. I was diagnosed with bipolar/depression over ten years ago and put on medication for it.The weight began to pile on and no matter what I did, I couldn't get rid of it. As life went on, my medication was increased. Many years later, I was laid off from a job, then right after was in a car accident that left me with chronic back pain. Everything I did was uncomfortable, so I did basically nothing while waiting for it to heal, even more weight piled on and I spiraled further into depression. My medications were maxed out and I was taking 3 different kinds and I felt awful. So I forced myself to be more active and when the doctor gave me the go ahead, I would spare for my brother's slo-pitch team. Which was all fun and games until somebody got hurt. that somebody being me. While playing, there was a misstep and I ended up going down when I hurt my knee really bad. The doctor was pretty sure I tore something in there but not much could be done while I waited for my MRI. I was on crutches and even when I was more mobile, I was in constant pain and the great news, I had 14 months to wait for my MRI! I tried to go on as normal but it was near impossible. I was in pain and the fact that I was still struggling with my weight made the pain worse because I had a lot of extra weight to carry around. It was at this time that I started hearing the buzz about Koyabell. I've known Coach Rish for a while now but even as he spoke about it, i figured there was no way I could do it. It all seemed like things that were impossible to me at that time. Swinging a kettlebell? I'll drop it. A squat? really? I couldn't even bend my knee without crying. A burpee? I'd go down and never get back up. My Mom decided to go try it out and see if she could get some pain relief from her car accident. She seemed to really like it and really got into it so now I had both her and Coach Rish talking to me about it and assuring there were modifications. So, in complete fear, I signed up for a workshop. I was terrified. I showed up with this big honking knee brace and had to have modifications for almost everything but I made it through and began taking class. Coach Rish wanted to eventually have me do class without a knee brace and get me off my medication, which I'll admit, I found laughable at the time and straight up told him, no way, it would never happen. I was made to believe I had to be on them for life. But I was all for getting rid of the knee brace, for being able to move pain free again and to eventually get back into the wrestling ring because the one thing I've always wanted to do and want to keep doing, is wrestle and not be stuck behind the table playing videos and music for the rest of my life and Koyabell brought back hope that I could wrestle once again. Within weeks I was starting to do more and feel a tiny bit better. Then I had my MRI and it turned out my knee was a lot worse then the doctor originally thought. Anything and everything that could be torn in my knee was torn and I had to make a choice. Surgery or not. Things were different and one did not HAVE to go for surgery anymore, there were pro's and con's either way. So after my Mom, I talked to Coach Rish about my options and he was so sure I could get through this without surgery so I decided to keep going to class and trying that way. I have amazing luck, I really do and not long after that, I was moving during a snow fall and slipped on some steps, I was so worried about ruining all the progress to my knee, I did everything in my power to save it, and with that, did almost the same thing to my other knee. see how amazing my luck is? I had to take time off, I started a new job, I dealt with another major bout of depression and it honestly took me a while to get back into the swing of things. (Kettlebell, swing, ha!) When I finally went back to Koyabell, I was there but not fully. I was frustrated by the starting and stopping, I was frustrated by my weight not moving even when I was working hard, I was frustrated by all the little bumps I hit. Something finally clicked though. I can't say exactly what it was or when it was but I realized something had to change, I had to try harder, I had to do this and give it my all if I want to do something about my weight I had to get to class as often as possible, sometimes it'll be once a week, sometimes it'll more. (my work schedule is messed up) I had to start paying attention to the nutrition side of things and follow the awesome advice Coach Rish had given but I never completely followed. When someone tells you, no milk, no sugar, no gluten when you're not very disciplined, you tend to say okay, while still sometimes eating it(especially gluten, I love pasta :s) but I told myself this time, I was going to listen and immediately I noticed a difference. It was like a fog was lifted, I wasn't tired anymore, my stomach didn't hurt. I was diagnosed with Celiac's soon after and suddenly, it was like the final puzzle piece clicked into place. I had energy, I wanted to work out, eating didn't bug me so much because it didn't hurt! and the biggest part of it all I was finally able to do class without my knee brace. No one knows this but I almost cried after class that day. Over two years with that stupid knee brace on and I did a whole class without it. I haven't worn it since. My medication had gone from being maxed out on three kinds down to one and my doctor is optimistic I can be medication free one day and the best part? I'm finally losing weight. Being diagnosed with Celiac's made me realize I didn't have a choice, I had to eat better, so I am, and in doing so, I have energy to work out more and if I can't go to class, I go to a 24 hour gym and work out and in the past 7 weeks, I've lost 16 lbs. and so many inches and it's keeping me motivated and happy. The next logical step was for me to chronicle this for many reasons. I want to be able to look back on the days when I want to give up (Because they will happen) I want to see my journey in it's entirety and most of all, I want to help others out there because let's face it, when all is said and done, I have a story, a good one that can help others. It took ten years, TEN! to realize what was going on inside me, to learn what I needed to do, to finally see some changes in me and you know what? That's okay because I know now and I can do something about it and if you're out there reading this and struggling as well. Don't give up. Seriously. You may think they're just words but really. DON"T. GIVE. UP. I'm proof of that. Things can and will change but it's up to you to keep trying. So here we go, on my journey and it's going to be a great one. 

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I woke up today and I felt awful mentally. Just awful. I didn’t want to get up and go tanning like I planned, I didn’t want to get up and prep my food like I should’ve, I didn’t want to get up and go...

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