mynameskarlaaa

[mynameskarlaaa]

Cheers to 21 years of life. Happy 21st to me.

[mynameskarlaaa]

My birthday is coming up, finally 21. Damn who would have thought. 21, and single.

[mynameskarlaaa]

Wow going to a dodger game today, it's been so long since i've been to one. It's so nice to be invited to things that make me happy. SO EXCITED. AHHHHH 😁😁😁

[mynameskarlaaa]

Wow wow wow, i'm going to a dodger game in tuesday! Man this feels so good, being happy has been the best thing that could ever happen. Cheers to happiness

[mynameskarlaaa]

Tonight was so nice. I haven't been to the movies in so long or had such a good time. The conversation was so interesting and never boring.

[mynameskarlaaa]

My self esteem is coming up every day and i love it. I am honestly so excited for saturday

[mynameskarlaaa]

I hate my dreams lately

[mynameskarlaaa]

Slowly i'm finding myself again, doing little things that make me happy. I started to go out with my friends and sisters. It feels nice to laugh and feel good about myself. Who would have vet thought that in a span of two weeks i'd dye my hair, get a tattoo, and pierce my nose. Look at me, so proud.

[mynameskarlaaa]

Belated Day five.

Long story short i got drunk, drunk texted him like no other. I am so ashamed, ugh why Karla why?! I’m just going to crawl back into my cave now.

[mynameskarlaaa]

Today's goal: Stay off social media

[mynameskarlaaa]

Day four.

Today was easier than yesterday, i think getting a goodbye and knowing that you don't hate me is making this hurt a little less. Today i ate good meals, i didn't cry once. I was in fullerton and whenever id pass by somewhere were we made a memory long ago i'd just smile. Smile because those memories will always be so precious to me and i will always hold them close to my heart. I feel like it's hurting a little less every day, i'm trying to motivate myself and tell myself that i'll be okay that i'm strong. I will be strong again one day, i just have to take everything one step at a time. Being with sisters helps, it helps me smile a little more and forget about the pain i feel in my heart. I hope you're healing too, not drinking as much still or doing drugs you know. All i want is the best for you and for you to heal little by little too but not in a way where you hurt yourself. I still miss you every second of the day but i just have to let go. I won't forget you or the memories we made or the love we share i'll just have to put it all away and lock it up with a key until one day we either meet again or it stays locked up. Let's see how tomorrow goes. "Learn to make you happy or no one else will"

[mynameskarlaaa]

Day three.

Well i got my goodbye, i guess? idk. It was something. I guess i have to take what i can get. At least i know that well you don't hate me but i also know that you're ready to be a free man. That's okay. We all heal and cope in different ways. I ate two full meals today. I'm so proud, i ate breakfast with my parents and then the habit with my cousin. It actually stayed down this time, i think it's a good sign, a sign that my body is ready to begin recovering. I think i'm ready to face the days with out you, wake up and make myself smile on my own. It's going to be hard but not impossible. You'll make yourself smile in your own way. I'll do it my way. I'm going to work out, gain the body i desire. Eat healthy, try new things, maybe start going out a bit more and enjoying life. Baby steps though, baby steps. I think i can begin to smile a little more, maybe smile at myself and tell myself i'm beautiful, i matter, and i am strong. I know i'll still miss you, maybe you will miss me too. Who knows? Only God knows. Today was easier than the first and second day. Another step towards happiness, another step towards healing. Another step towards being the best me i can be. I hope to see you one day when i'm healed, so you can see how beautiful and amazing i truly was. It's time for a new chapter in my book. Until next time to Jeremiah and Karla. Hello to well Just Karla. "Love, it isn't entirely perfect. But you know it is when you love yourself first each and every day"

[mynameskarlaaa]

Signs

I wish i had one sign, something that lets me know you still think about me, you wonder how i am, maybe you read my tumblr? I doubt that. You probably don't even remember my tumblr name. I just wish i had one sign just one that told me our love didn't just disappear overnight for you...

[mynameskarlaaa]

[mynameskarlaaa]

[mynameskarlaaa]

Tomorrow's Goal: Don't throw up

[mynameskarlaaa]