mylefteyetooth-blog

[mylefteyetooth-blog]

Two weeks to go - post extraction

It’s done. My last remaining baby tooth is gone, which I think means I am officially an adult. I was quite tempted to ask to keep it, but was focused on other things and didn’t get around to it. I assume the dentist didn’t offer because the last tooth is worth more form the tooth fairy...

The first thing the dentist did was inject the anaesthetic. This hurt a little less than I expected, but did involve being injected four or five times. The anaesthetic kicked in rapidly, spreading as far as my nose in under a minute.

While waiting for the full effect to take hold, the dentist showed me the finalized Clin Checks and talked over his projections. The end result looks… well, just like normal teeth. Perfectly straight, nothing makeshift or half-baked about it. The Clin Checks predicted this could be achieved in 30 aligners, which at an aligner per week would mean around 30 weeks until the end of my treatment, a good chunk less than the year I was expecting. However, my dentist believes that this might be overly optimistic, and is still aiming for 12 to 14 months for the completion of treatment. From what I’ve since read, this is common, and the subsequent rounds of treatments needed are referred to as ‘refinements’. My dentist assured me this is covered by the initial cost I’ve already paid.

I will need a large number of resin attachments, due to the extent of the movement needed to correct my teeth. I may also require a button attachment to the ectopic canine, which will work as an anchor for an elastic putting more pressure on that tooth to move into place. These won’t be affixed yet, though.

Another part of the process will be the narrowing of some of my existing teeth to make room for the movement. A couple of upper teeth will be narrowed by 0.2 millimetres, and about four lower teeth by 0.3 millimetres. This will be achieved using a diamond file. Given how much I enjoyed the scale and polish, I imagine this will not be a particularly pleasant experience.

After informing me of all of this, my dentist asked whether I felt numb. I did. Very.

The numbness was pretty strong, and far reaching. Speaking felt very odd, because my upper lip was entirely number on one side. So I was ready, and it was time to pull the tooth.

If you read my previous post, you’ll know how much I was dreading this.

It was fine. The dentist used a couple of different tools to loosen the tooth for a while, and then it was gone before I even realized it. I only knew for certain because he gave me a gauze pack to bite down on to stem the bleeding.

I think much of my anxiety was rooted in my previous experiences. Before today, the teeth I’ve had extracted were both baby teeth with ectopic adult counterparts, like this one, but they had grown incredibly loose before I’d sought intervention from a dentist. Consequently, step one after the anaesthetic was simply pulling them out. From this, I had erroneously concluded that the method of extracting teeth was to numb the area and then just pull them out. I had no idea there was a loosening process for those teeth that—like this one—were not already making their escape.

I was so relieved that I only sort of absorbed the aftercare instructions from my dentist. Luckily, he had a printout for me, along with a spare gauze pack in case the bleeding starts up again.

General advice for healing after an extraction:

Take it easy: no heavy lifting or vigorous exercise. Part of the reason for this is that the numbness can last a while, and you may not realize if you are causing yourself injury.

Do not take aspirin: aspirin thins the blood, so could cause extra bleeding. Other painkillers are okay if needed.

Eat soft foods: nothing crunchy for you! This is advised for at least the first day, and for up to four days afterwards depending on your healing.

Chew on the other side of your mouth.

No hot drinks: apart from the numbness meaning you could burn yourself without realizing, hot drinks also run the risk of slowing or preventing clotting. Cold and lukewarm drinks are fine.

About four hours after the extraction, rinse your mouth with lukewarm saline. Do this around four more times the day following the extraction.

Do NOT use mouthwash.

Eat ice cream: this one was not suggested by my dentist, but it made me feel better.

For me, the numb sensation lasted about 2 and a half hours. I ate before than the feeling had fully returned to my lips (it was around 7pm at this point), so I don’t know if that triggered the end of the anaesthetic, or if it would have happened then anyway. From what I’ve read, the estimated timeframe for numbness is up to five hours, so I landed smack in the middle. Initially, I felt a fair bit of soreness around the extraction site as the anaesthetic first faded (around thirty minutes after extraction), but by the time the anaesthetic had worn off completely, the soreness was mostly gone unless I touched my mouth. I am rather dreading brushing me teeth, though, and will be very careful when doing so to avoid the area.

My soft food of choice was savoury porridge, which was perfect because I barely had to chew at all. I kept entirely to the other side of my mouth, and didn’t have any issues with pain or bleeding. I then followed that up with ice cream because I feel I deserve it.

Since the extraction, I’ve looked in the mirror and smiled widely three times. Honestly, I’m not thrilled with what I see, but I guess I can live with it for now. I am glad that I am already set up for the Invisalign and so won’t have to deal with the gap for too long. If the tooth had come loose on its own and I’d have been without a plan, I could have been stuck with the gap for many more months.

My first set of aligners will hopefully be available in two weeks. I’ll keep them on for a fortnight, and then go back to see how things are going. After that, the dentist will file my teeth and affix the resin attachments. The elastic, if needed, will come later.

So I know now that I have two weeks of freedom left before locking my teeth up in dental-jail for a term of 12 to 14 months (with early release possible for good behaviour). I can’t decide whether to use these two weeks to train myself in the good habits I’ll need, or whether to go wild and snack on sugary sweets and chocolate the whole time.

Probably I’ll have a balance, with a few last cups of tea and sugary drinks crammed in.

I definitely plan to make the most of my Invisalign, though. After all, I just gave my left eye tooth to get them.

[mylefteyetooth-blog]

Two Weeks to Go - pre-extraction

Today will be my last full day with my baby tooth.

The extraction is scheduled for tomorrow, and I must admit to a huge amount of apprehension, but I am getting ahead of myself. I had my last dental appointment three weeks ago (before my holiday to the US). The appointment covered two things: photos and scans of my teeth, for building the Invisalign; and a scale and polish.

I felt a bit self-conscious during the photos. The lighting was unflatteringly bright (of course,), and I wasn’t smiling the way I normally do, to hide my smile. I was being told to smile wider, to show off all of my teeth, and then focus was given to that one tooth I always hate cropping up in pictures of me. I don’t really ever want to see those photos, though I suppose it might be nice to see them at the end, when everything has been fixed. The scans of my teeth were not so bad. It was a little awkward—the dentist ran a sort of scanner wand over each of my teeth, and having a random object in your mouth is never completely normal—but there was no pain, and it was much less uncomfortable than the initial moulding I had done back when Invisaligns were a mere twinkle in my dentist’s eye. Getting the moulds done involved biting as hard as I could into a weird putty that dried out my mouth. Having the scans done was much preferable; I think both are needed, with the mouldings being to put together your Clin Checks (photos showing the expected changes to your teeth) and the scans being to create the aligners, but if you have a choice I’d opt for the scans!

The scale and polish was horrific. I hate the sound of the grinding of my teeth. It fills my head with an unpleasant and inescapable static. The process left each tooth extra sensitive, which was tested and proven by the small blast of cold water continuously being shot into my mouth and making my teeth ache. I could never figure out where to put my tongue, and any time I did manage to shift my focus and relax a little, my dentist would ask me to open my mouth a little wider because it had started to drift shut again.

It felt like it lasted forever, possibly because I’ve only rarely had my teeth polished up and I couldn’t remember how long it would take. I actually couldn’t tell you the actual time that elapsed while I sang songs desperately in my head as a distraction. Maybe twenty minutes? It felt like longer.

I am dreading tomorrow. I have had two other baby teeth extracted since becoming an adult, but in both cases the removal was necessitated by the tooth becoming fairly loose on its own. The first dentist said that the extraction was so easy, he wouldn’t even charge me for it! He worked at the dentist school in Edinburgh, and I still remember his kindness. Thinking of him made it easier to seek treatment this time around: there are nice, gentle dentists out there!

My last baby tooth is not even a little wobbly. It has clung on determinedly all these years, and I am certain it will hurt much more to have it removed. Of course, I will also most likely be having an injection into my gums to numb the area. I’m not afraid of needles—I’m a regular blood donor—but being injected in the gums in particular scares me. I know my gums are sensitive and full of nerves. We’ve bought in yoghurts and soups so I can avoid chewing for a few days while it heals (though from what I’ve read, it is important that the soup be lukewarm rather than hot, as heat can prevent efficient clotting).

Up to now, the worry about the pain has been my main focus. As extraction day has crept up on me, though, I have also been struck by the knowledge that after the tooth is extracted, the gap I so desperately want to avoid will be right there, at the front of my smile. I don’t know yet how long it will be after the extraction that my first aligner is fitted; it seems to take one to two weeks to fully heal, so I am guessing something like that. And of course, it will take a few aligners before there is any difference at all in my smile. This means I don’t know how long the gap will be there, but likely it will be present at the party I’m throwing with friends I’ve not seem for a long time in early July, and still there for my birthday in mid-July.

This all sort of hit me yesterday, and I got pretty upset about it. My husband didn’t understand why I was so upset about the gap, trying to reassure me that my friends won’t think less of me. I’m not remotely worried that my friends will think less of me. I am just sad that events where I’d normally like to take photos will end up with me hiding my smile and feeling embarrassed.

There is a feeling of shame when I think of having a gap in my teeth and wearing braces as an adult, and though I have grown determined to go through with this treatment, I have not totally eliminated the shame I associate with it. Reading how many other people have shared these experiences has helped normalize my feelings, but few of those accounts had fully ectopic teeth and huge gaps before the treatment started. After spending a decent amount of time staring at the mirror and picturing my smile with the baby tooth gone, I have come to a place of acceptance. It won’t look great, but I think it will less noticeable than I’m imagining.

Which means now I can go back to worrying about how much it’s going to hurt.

[mylefteyetooth-blog]

Things I Googled Before Getting Invisalign

As I’ve mentioned in my first post, I didn’t find out as much as I’d hoped from my initial visit with the dentist. Instead, I turned to good old Google. Below, I’ve compiled some of my searches and the answers that turned up, to save you the same effort. Obviously none of this should trump advice from your dentist!

What does Invisalign look like while it’s being worn?

This was one of the first things I wanted to know, and one of the hardest things to find out! It was only on a personal blog that I found photographs of Invisalign being actually worn. Frustratingly, the leaflets provided by my dentist all showed attractive ladies with perfect teeth holding the Invisalign in their hands. One of my main motivations for this blog is to keep track of my journey through photos so that other people will be able to see what the Invisalign will look like. I plan to take some pictures throughout the process with the Invisalign in and out, so you can compare and really see the difference.

How long do I need to wear my Invisalign for each day?

The short answer is 22 hours. There isn’t really a long answer, but essentially if you do less than this, there are consequences: you may experience more discomfort when putting in your new aligners; you may have to wait longer to put your next aligners in because they don’t fit at all; you may lengthen the overall treatment process; and you may compromise the end results. The first two of these are because each aligner is made right at the start of your treatment, and you swap them out yourself at home.  If your teeth haven’t moved as much as predicted, then the next set of aligners will not fit you as neatly.

Honestly, 22 hours a day seems like a very long time, and does not allow much time to eat. To help me get into good habits, I’ve made myself a spreadsheet to track how long I spend on each meal and subsequent tooth brushing each day. I know from experience that calorie tracking helps me eat more healthily, so I’m hoping that Invisalign tracking will help me stick to this.

How to avoid cavities with Invisalign?

Wearing Invisalign prevents the natural enzymes in your saliva from washing over your teeth and removing lingering sugars and other harmful materials from food. It instead holds these against your teeth, unless you take efforts to thoroughly remove them.

Researching this led me to a terrifying blog about how it’s almost impossible to avoid cavities while wearing Invisalign, and the effort involved in doing so sounded so time-consuming there didn’t seem to be any time left over in the two Invisalign-free hours to eat.

Luckily, the comments on the post were much more balanced, from “I barely brushed at all and I was fine” to “I chew sugar-free gum, brush, floss, use mouthwash, and soak my Invisalign every time I remove it”. From the spread of experiences, I’m guessing that something in the middle would work, so I needn’t panic just yet. I’ve never had cavities before, so I don’t really know what the warning signs are, aside from tooth pain (I assume). Obviously this is something I’d like to avoid—both for my dental health and for my financial health!

To that end, I have already started flossing much more regularly to get used to it being a daily thing and to get better at it (I timed myself recently, and it took much longer than I’d have liked, so I want to get faster without compromising effectiveness). I plan to brush/floss/use mouthwash after each meal before replacing my Invisalign, but won’t bother with chewing gum. At least, that is my initial plan, but we’ll see how I stick to that, and whether it works well enough! If I get even one cavity, then I’m going to have to up my efforts even if it is time-consuming.

Will I lose weight with Invisalign?

For many of us, this seems like a lovely bonus: after suffering through the Invisalign, not only will you have a nicer smile, but we’ll have slimmed down a bit. From what I’ve read, most Invisalign patients do lose weight, but only around 7lbs to 10lbs, so it’s not significant. The reason for this is, obviously, the inconvenience of snacking and the reduction in meal times. For some, it will probably also be a result of cutting out drinks other than water (fizzy drinks and sugary coffees, for example). While the aligners are in, you can only drink plain water, which is bound to also be great for the skin. How much more attractive I could be in just one year!

The small amount of weight loss is not guaranteed—to stop yourself going hungry, you may find you eat more at mealtimes. If you are already at a healthy weight (or if you are underweight), then this may be something you should intentionally do to prevent any loss.

Definitely I wouldn’t regard the aligners as a quick way to lose a lot of weight, but they may give your willpower a little boost when it comes to resisting snacks.

Will Invisalign make me lisp?

It can affect speech, but normally this fades after a few weeks, faster if you take time to practice. Some people do have issues with speaking for longer (even for the whole length of the treatment), and some people experience no change at all, so there’s no way of knowing how much it’ll affect you. I think I’ll be saying a lot of s-based tongue twisters in private for my first few weeks to help the  adjustment process along…

How should I clean my Invisalign aligners?

Googling this was not helpful, to be honest, as I came up with many different answers. Use specially formulated stuff, use vinegar, use denture cleansers… One thing that came up was do not use toothpaste: it is too abrasive, and will leave the aligners looking cloudy due to tiny scratches. I also came up with a hundred different answers on how frequently you’re meant to do this.

I ended up asking my dentist this one. He recommended Retainer Brite (although he does sell this, so a different brand of the same stuff would probably be fine too). He said that ten minutes every other day or so is fine, and then to just rinse with cold water between uses otherwise, and maybe brush with a soft toothbrush. The cold water is important, as high temperatures could warp the shape of the retainer.

Can I drink alcohol while on Invisalign treatment?

This question is one I’m not going to take to my dentist! The strict answer is you can only drink alcohol during the two hours you have your retainers out, which for most people will either lead to no ability to get pleasantly tipsy, or will mean doing a huge number of shots and hoping for the best.

The prospect of a year sober was a bit of a downer to me, and I am definitely not going the shots-route.

There are two ways to compromise. If you don’t drink very frequently, the better option might be to take the aligners out for an extra hour or two on the rare occasion you fancy getting drunk. However, the more frequently you do this, the more your treatment will be compromised. Also, be aware that if you have attachments, these could stain, so stay away from darkly coloured alcohols like red wine even with the retainers out.

I have found accounts of people drinking clear alcohols with clear low-sugar mixers (gin and light tonic, vodka and diet soda) with their retainers in, using a straw to bypass their teeth more. This requires you to frequently rinse with water (no bad thing to drink extra water when you’re getting tipsy!), and to be very careful to clean both the aligners and your teeth thoroughly at the end of the night. No dentist is ever going to approve of this, because you are raising your risk of cavities. Some people have said that they have done this throughout their treatment with no consequences, so the risk may be acceptable to you, if not your dentist.

Neither of these two options is perfect, and the best thing to do would be to stick to your two hour window for drinking. It will vary so much what works best for you and your lifestyle, and it’s important to understand and consider the consequences to your treatment before making a decision to flout the guidelines.

A year of reduced alcohol intake will probably contribute to overall better health and nicer skin, so I guess it has its own benefits too!

[mylefteyetooth-blog]

Five Weeks to Go

I am a 27-year-old woman who should have had her teeth fixed years ago. The issues I have existed when I was a teenager, when treatment on the NHS would have been free, but I didn’t get them addressed then (in part because my Mum had a terrible experience with braces and she passed on her fear to me), and since growing out of the free NHS option I’ve never been stable or rich enough to get the problem resolved.

Here is the dental issue: with all of my canines, and a couple of my premolars on the top, the baby tooth did not come out naturally, and the adult tooth grew in the wrong place (known as having ‘ectopic eruption’). Over the years, I lost all but one of the baby teeth, with or without intervention, and generally the remaining adult teeth have shifted to be in more or less the right position; most recently, I had the baby premolar pulled out in December 2017, after the tooth started cracking and causing pain when brushing and chewing.

After fixing the immediate issue, my dentist began going over treatment options with me to fix the remaining canine; the adult canine on the left sits so far up in my mouth that it isn’t obvious to most people that it even exists, and it is basically impossible that it would move into the right place on its own. When (and dentists assure me it is when, not if) the baby tooth comes out on its own, I’d be left with a gap near the front of my smile.

This was the first dentist to discuss my options for braces kindly, to take my concerns about cost seriously, and to encourage me in such a way that it finally felt feasible. I had a few more appointments with the Invisalign expert at my normal dental surgery, who was similarly supportive. This took some time, as I had to wait until after Christmas and New Year for the first consultation. It was eventually decided that there would not be enough change possible with the Invisalign Lite available at my regular dentist’s to make that treatment worth the expense, time, and effort, so I was referred to a separate clinic that offers the full Invisalign treatment.

Invisalign, for the uninitiated, are sets of clear(ish) plastic aligners worn over the teeth. They are swapped regularly—usually weekly or fortnightly—and each new set brings the teeth closer to the position that they would occupy if only they’d grown in nice and straight. They may be supported with the use of elastics, in particularly difficult cases, to move the teeth a little further, and may also require the use ‘attachments’ on your teeth made of dental resin to make their grip more secure. The attachments will remain on your teeth while the aligners are out, but will be removed at the end of the treatment course. Treatment length varies (for me, it is predicted to be 12 months).

I finally got an appointment at the new clinic in early May, so around six months after the premolar extraction. The dentist showed me my Clin Checks (the predictions for how my teeth would change with the treatment) and discussed my options. He told me that traditional braces would cost as much as Invisalign, that the results would be little different, and that they would be more restrictive in terms of diet. With that information, it seemed a no-brainer that I would do the Invisalign. The Invisalign will also require fewer appointments, as unlike braces they don’t get adjusted: you just swap out for the next aligner. Given I have to fit in appointments around a full-time job, this was a nice bonus.

I made a down-payment of £390 after the free consultation—£350 for the initial moulding of my teeth etc., and another £40 for a scale and polish prior to starting with the aligners. I have a further £4,125 to pay for the full treatment plan, including the cost of the aligners and the necessary appointments along the way.

At the stage when I made the payment, I didn’t know nearly as much about Invisalign as I feel I should have. I started Googling when I got home, and I found out all sorts of things my dentist didn’t discuss with me before I agreed to the treatment. He didn’t tell me I’d need to wear the aligners for 22 hours a day, and take them out only to eat, with vigorous brushing in between. He didn’t tell me I’d only be able to drink water during this time, and that hot drinks will warp the aligners, so I’ll have to cut out tea. He didn’t tell me that people wearing Invisalign are at increased risk of cavities, as their saliva can’t wash their teeth clean while they are wearing the aligners, so harmful sugars need to be removed thoroughly before the aligners are replaced. He didn’t tell me that I will likely have ‘attachments’ of dental resin placed on several of my teeth to anchor the aligners, and that these can stain if I drink certain things like tea or red wine with the aligners out. He didn’t tell me I’d need retainers after the treatment is complete, which I’ll wear at night for the rest of my life.

He also didn’t tell me when I’ll have my last baby tooth—the left canine, also known as an eye tooth—pulled out, so I hope he has a plan for that.

My next appointment is this Friday, and that will include creating scans of my teeth and taking lots of photos of my current smile, so they can get the aligners made for me. I have done a decent bit of research about Invisalign between my last appointment and this one. I do wish I’d been better informed, but now I am armed with some questions (particularly I’d like to know what my dentist recommends to keep the aligners clean, because I’ve come across contradictory information online). Even knowing everything I know now, I am convinced this is the right choice for me.

I have had a lot of emotional reactions about getting the braces. I feel embarrassed that it took me so long to get the problem fixed. I also feel a sort of vague embarrassment attached to having bad teeth in general, despite the issue having nothing to do with hygiene or anything under my control. I feel frustrated that I didn’t address the issue when I was young enough to get the treatment for free, and that I’ve missed out on years of enjoying my smile. I am appalled with how much it will cost me now; I come from a working class background, and live in an expensive UK city. It has taken me years to build up my savings and I was planning on it all going towards a house deposit. To lose such a big chunk on something that feels cosmetic is galling. My husband is from the US and is more used to paying for medical care, and he has helped me adjust to spending so much. It is a health issue, as well as a cosmetic issue, and I’ve come to accept that. I have felt frightened of the social and professional repercussions of being an adult with braces. Reading how other people my age have dealt with Invisalign has really eased that worry for me, so finally I am at a stage where my main feeling is determination. I will get this taken care of now. I hope I have the willpower to be strict with myself, and that I take careful enough care of my teeth to avoid cavities (I’ve never had one before).

Right now, I am a little anxious about whether my final baby tooth will be extracted during this appointment or not. On Saturday, I am going on vacation to the US, which will include attending a friend’s wedding, and celebrating my own wedding belatedly with friends who live far away. I’d prefer to have my current smile for those events: the baby tooth sits in the normal smile line, so having it extracted will create a gap until the adult tooth is pulled into place. If the baby tooth is extracted this Friday, I’ll just have to put up with it. The dentist told me it will take two weeks to get everything ready for the first aligner to be made, which means that by the time my vacation is over, I should be able to get started on the Invisalign treatment, and my eagerness to get started overrides my worry about my appearance.

Many of the experiences I’ve read about online discuss how the aligners changed food habits, because snacking just isn’t worth it when you need to 1) take out and rinse your aligners; 2) enjoy your snack; 3) brush your teeth, floss your teeth, use mouthwash; 4) refit the aligners. Especially because this eats (ha!) into the two hours a day you are supposedly allowed to have the aligners out, many people cut out snacks entirely. I have already reduced my snacking a lot this year (due to a sudden health kick in January), but I’ve usually allowed myself to be a bit more freedom at the weekends, so I’m expecting some change there. I also normally have a cup of tea twice a day at work, which will obviously need to be eliminated and replaced with water. My normal drink is water, apart from that, so I’m glad I already made that change. Giving up tea, pop, and snacks, all at the same time would have been especially rough.

One other thing about my vacation, with the upcoming food restrictions in mind, is that it will be sort of my last hurrah. While I’m away, I’m going to eat all of my favourite American foods, as often as I like, and I’m going to drink root beer, and I’m going to snack snack snack. I won’t be keeping track on a calorie counter like I do most days; that can wait until I’m back. I’m seeing this trip as my last little burst of freedom, before a year of my teeth being locked up in plastic jail.

I know I’ll put on some weight during this trip, but I reckon that the ‘Invisalign diet’ I’ve read so much about will help me get things back under control. I’m planning to continue my use of a calorie counter during the Invisalign treatment to not only make sure I’m not eating too many calories (as I currently do), but also to help me figure out how many calories I need per meal to feel full until I next plan to eat.

One risk that is not discussed very much in my online reading, but which I am aware of, is the possibility that being strict with my Invisalign may cause me to relapse to my other unhealthy eating habits of skipping meals. I did this a lot as a teenager, and on and off in my early 20s. I have overcome my past issue with calorie counters, no longer obsessing over eating under 500 calories per day for short bursts then reverting to binging, in huge part because of the support of my husband. Hopefully I won’t now replace that with an obsession to keep the retainers in for as long as possible, leading me to skip meals more often. I was never a dangerously low weight as a result of skipping meals, and never kept the habit for longer than a few months at a time, but for those who have recovered from a serious eating disorder, I think Invisalign would be a potentially dangerous option (traditional braces also carry restrictions around food, so could possibly come with many of the same issues).

This is definitely something people need to consider before going ahead with treatment. I’m in a healthy place, both in my eating habits and mentally, so the treatment carries a small and acceptable risk for me. For others, the risk may be much greater and not worth it.

Because reading about other peoples’ experiences has been so valuable to me now, before I’ve had the Invisalign fitted, I have decided to keep a record of my experiences. I’ll also be taking photos of my progress (including some pics with the Invisalign in, because I found this hard to find online and was so curious to see how it would look!). I’ll take the photos regularly, and hopefully side-by-side comparisons will show the differences.

It is so hard to envisage the version of me who will exist at the end of the treatment. I’ve lived with my messed up teeth for so long. I hate some of my wedding photos because you can see that random extra tooth (which is so sad, because it only shows in the pictures where I’m really happy and smiling widely or laughing), and have hated photos of myself for this reason most of my adult life. I don’t want to get my hopes up too high in case the result is not as good as I imagine. I am picturing myself smiling unselfconsciously for the first time at my 29th birthday next July, but I don’t know if that will ever be my reality. One tooth—that’s all I desperately want to fix—and it’s costing me a third of my savings, my daily tea, and a year to do so. The money, the discomfort, the changes to my lifestyle—I hope it is worth it all to get that smile.