mycaptainjones

[mycaptainjones]

i think it's so fun that "damn" is such a casual curse word now that it's basically become divorced completely from its original meaning. like oops i dropped my phone, time to invoke the wrath of god about it in the most mildly annoyed tone of voice imaginable.

[mycaptainjones]

#if I had a nickel for every time a noble she-elf held her scruffy love interest at knife-point, I would have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice THE LORD OF THE RINGS THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING (2001) dir. Peter Jackson THE RINGS OF POWER : ALLOYED (2022) dir. Wayne Yip

[mycaptainjones]

"you should be at the club" I should be working on my fanfic

[mycaptainjones]

The good plot twists aren't the ones that are wild left turns out of nowhere, they're the ones that make all the other little things that didn't quite add up before suddenly click

[mycaptainjones]

you know how people say that cats and dogs don’t feel love the way humans do but it’s like. “oh they don’t love you they just associate you with warmth and safety and seek out your company and being near you and spending time with you makes them feel comfortable and secure” bro if that’s not love then what the FUCK do you think love is???

[mycaptainjones]

Petition to bring back the boop function next year for the ides of March where instead of a paw on the screen it’s a little knife that Caesar gets stabbed with

[mycaptainjones]

sauron: but at the very least do try not to make any new enemies galadriel: sauron: without me

[mycaptainjones]

i LOVE the word decorum . like please! have some decorum ✋

[mycaptainjones]

Would you like to import your contact—

[mycaptainjones]

"the world isn't kind" ok??? Much more importantly are you?????

[mycaptainjones]

honestly he's on to something tumblr really is the best place for him to advertise this

[mycaptainjones]

hey man I found a piece of your soul stuck in the text messages of old friends you don’t speak to anymore. do you want it back

[mycaptainjones]

#Oh she gagged them, thank you Saoirse <3

[mycaptainjones]

Steve handing over Nancy’s gun.

[mycaptainjones]

[mycaptainjones]