my-artistic-blog

[my-artistic-blog]

I miss you

But there’s so much time between us now like a wall I can’t get through

I never meant to leave like that

Guess I fell in my own trap

Wanted to be different and make a life that really changed things

but at the end of the day I’m still just writing down my feelings

In a desperate attempt to cope with a life I never signed up for

What box should I check if I’m ready to walk out the door

But life is full of possibilities and problems

I guess my mistake was thinking that we could solve them

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Playing the waiting game

When I first met you

I was struggling to get through

But you’ve always been so kind

I Think you changed my mind

Now you’re the vision in my minds eye

But I can’t help but wonder if all we’re doing is killing time

When I look at you I want to be… better, to be… different… to be…enough.

But it’s starting to feel like life’s just too damn tough

Like everything and everyone I touch

Just slips away into the dust.

When I think of you

Sometimes I can’t help it too

I think I see glimpses of something great

But then if I look too long you fall away

I wish I didn’t want to wait

But the fucked thing is I do

I want to fucking wait for you!

But I can’t wait forever

I’ve done it before

Taking glimpses and breadcrumbs and trying to make something more

So I’ll give you your space and try to stick to mine

Just know that lately you’ve been the only one on my damn mind

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I posted this on the wrong account but...

Me and my best friend @lunasunshine1 painted today

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[my-artistic-blog]

It hurts to look at you

All i can see is what we could’ve been

What I want to be

You said you wanted it too

Hell maybe you still do

But you’re with him

You seem happy with him and how could I ruin that

I’m sorry I got scared and it’s way too little way too late

But if I don’t say it I’ll never be okay

I want you

I always have

I just know you could do better than I can ever be

I never want to see you settling for less and that’s me

I’m better off alone

That’s all I’ve ever known

Probably all I ever will

And it hurts to look at you

Because my soul aches when you smile with the longing to be the source

It aches when you frown with the urge to make you laugh

it hurts to think about you with him

but i would rather you happy anyway What I’m trying to say is I’m happy for you ( but very sad for me)

[my-artistic-blog]

Creativity

Never fall in love with an artist

You’ll never see a beautiful sunset without the one they drew you in your minds eye

Don’t fall for a photographer

Every time you open your eyes and see the sun streaming through your window all you’ll see is the pictures they took of early morning in the apartment you used to share

Don’t fall for a musician

Because when you hear your favorite song you’ll notice how it will never be as good as it was when they played it for you

Don’t fall for the creative type they change the way you look at everything around you and it’s difficult to forget a lover when you still view the world as if through their eyes

[my-artistic-blog]

Our loss

Our loss cause of Your lies

My tears from my eyes

You couldn’t take the truth

So you made your own

Am I wrong?

Were you right?

I don’t get why we fight sometimes

I try to listen to your side

But you won’t listen to mine

Every single word I write

ever since we met that night

has been about you

Every single time you lie

Don’t try and get me with a line

our friends wrote for you

Now the truth is I’m relieved

cause you’re not even history

for me

Maybe it was our loss

but I’m done counting up the wrongs it’s nothing now, See you around.

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Looking back

Sorry I lied when I told you things would be fine

I thought things would get better if we gave it time

But I couldn’t change my heart like I can change my mind

Guess it’s the risk you take when falling out of love

I think I loved you but I’m not sure

it could’ve been I was just getting bored

what difference does it make in retrospect

We both fucked up.

who was right?

I lost track

I don’t really miss you

I miss the way I felt around you

I remember when I met you

I really did like you I just never could quite love you

And I’m sorry about that

[my-artistic-blog]

Empty hearts and bottles

Every day it gets worse

A relapse of my worst habits and my guilty pleasures are my curse

And everyday I wake up it’s heavier than the last

The burden of the pain and rage all stack up for the past

And it’s an ocean and I’m drowning in a glass

Just another asshole trying to pretend like it will pass

And everyday I come back to it

The only home I’ve ever known

one full of anger and pain

And that’s the only place I belong

And everyday it gets worse heavier even though it doesn’t change

I grow weaker by the day

A one way road right to my grave

And I don’t care who is right and I don’t care why you want to fight

I just want it to be over