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living as a system with aphantasia, and no inner world.

we didn't know we had it until we were 18. it isn't a huge struggle, but it's quite the shock to realize all of the things you missed out on growing up that other people had. we are honestly still in disbelief that being able to picture things in your mind is something most people can do. to us it sounds like some sort of fictitious superpower.

and the idea that it is "standard" for systems have full worlds within their minds where people have told us they can feel and see and hear and so much more? yeah- we will never be able to even begin to process that. /npa

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the term "host". a short comic about being a system who, well, doesn't exactly have one.

i really hope this post comes across right and not in a bashful or hateful light because that is !! not intended whatsoever!!

this is just a bit about the way some of our personal and inner struggles affect us, much like many of our posts, and is again just posted in case it may make anyone who relates feel seen (especially if it's an "obscure issue". i think we've only ever met one other system who doesn't have a host of some kind, and even then it was just because theirs went dormant and nobody took their place.)

we've never really had a host, or even actual co-hosts, from what we can remember. even in our earliest memories which we've looked back on from a system lens, there was (at least) two of us with no clear "main" one. that extended all throughout our teenage years up until now. it was always at least two who had no awareness of the other, but they were both here just as much as the other, "taking turns" fronting. weird stuff to try to make sense of.

we've tried to slap the host/co-host label on a few alters over time, but it never sticks and they always end up fronting just as much as anyone else or having their own other roles they front for. so i think we'll just stop trying to force it lol

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Do you know a fictive alter? Learn a little more about fictional interjects this System Saturday- er, I mean, Sunday! 🖤

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wonderful

i don't know if we will leave this up, because we aren't sure if it comes across how we would like. but the alter who wrote this, yellowfang, has wanted to create it for some time, so we opted to try.

we, once again, apologize for any art style inconsistencies. the comic artwork itself was worked on by several of us.

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an interaction im very tired of in online autism spaces. aka when you don’t have a special interest / when your special interest isn’t [character] or [fandom]

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hey man, you’ve been looking really glum ever since we reversed the genderbend curse that that wizard hit you with. is there something you wanna tell us?

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love hearing people talk about object shows. “guys bowl of rice is soo bisexual coded!!” you’re so right queen. sadly I eated him

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ii17 spoilers

grgrgrrrr i love knifecase

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In your starchild au, how do the rest of the shimmers treat MPhone4? I could definitely see them doting on them, or I could see that being more of the prime shimmer’s thing.

Also, the au and art are amazing; they give off very cozy vibes.

thank you, i'm glad to hear! :]

the first few weeks to first couple months, yes! it was very suffocating. mostly from prime, but mephone enjoyed the lengthy chats even if they went on for hours on end. he liked to hear what he'd missed out on. so, while prime would work throughout the ship, he'd sit and nod along.

mephone craves company, especially now. being alone with himself is something he avoids often.

the other shimmers were initially a bit mixed on their feelings towards him, but none negative. some with more caution, others very excited to get to know him! and talk to him, a lot of talking.

(prime's happiness towards mephone, despite being a collective, didn't make the other shimmers feel the same about him exactly, but it was a heavy influence on their perception of him. they all have varying opinions and ideas, they just exist within the same space that can be influenced by strong emotion, if that makes sense?)

even so, prime struggled for a long time to accept mephone as he was. the grief of seeing what their son had become, a mutilation of a shimmer made into the very thing that stole it, and hatred towards the meeple company... it was something they tried their best to work through without involving him. mephone was a victim of circumstance, after all. he is their son, home now and safe. he has nothing to apologize for—something prime tells themself often.

mephone notices sometimes, the look prime gives him when he mentions anything from his past. the competition, the contestants... their eyes flash a mix of sorrow, pain, and something else he can't pinpoint before they laugh and nod, asking him further questions about the many contests or eliminations. gone just as quickly as it came.

he refrains from talking about meeple. they both do.

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since justin confirmed non-melife characters would have real names, i wonder if i should give the starchild!ex-contestants real names too... or maybe some of them would keep the ones they already have.

i haven't thought as hard about the ex-contestants as i have about mephone or the shimmers in this au but i do really want to work that out more

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HIII I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THE STARCHILD AU I’M OBSESSED 🥹🥹

since you asked! here's a few random tidbits that hasn't been asked about yet :)

around the time mephone left to travel with the shimmers post ii18, the ex-contestants went to live across a few small towns and a bigger city by the coast (a straight-shot boatride from inanimate island, but a long one). they all live rather close, but that isn't set to last forever—among the many that don't call it home, salt and pepper plan to move to NYC at some point soon as they can get the funds.

additionally, they are all learning a LOT. the different culture of the real world (dating and marriage for one), the complexities of renting, having a job, science that was beyond even test tube's knowledge.

mortality is something they have to grapple with now so that's.. not fun. balloon is probably the most scared of the fact, and has regressed a bit in terms of secluding himself.

another tidbit,

mephone and the shimmers don't only stay on the ship, they sometimes visit planets with many different creatures and species, some very object-like, others not. mostly to show mephone around!

some people closer to prime and are aware of the missing shimmer egg (they used to give updates as to whether or not they heard its screams nearby) are overjoyed to learn that they were found! but theres always a point of confusion in why he's, well, a phone.

what else...

mephone is very, very scared of repeating his actions again. that is, generating a person without his knowledge. anyone he meets that isn't a shimmer, strangers who aren't friends of prime, he gets very nervous around. he can't trust himself. they could be real or they could be of his own creation, how would he even know?

with these people, he tends to slip in many questions relating to their past and parents to make sure they have one. it's become a habit, and it isn't very well hidden, either...

i would love to say that it's never been the case, that fear being validated. but it has, unfortunately. once.

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Shimmer4 because I saw a lot of designs for this guy, I wanted to make my own :3

I think the original is by Hyfin, Check them out !!!!

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assortment of prime shimmer and mephone4/shimmer4 doodles because HELL YEAH!!

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So, if i understand correctly, kittypets and other cats not from the clans and tribe are meant to be less smart/sentient? Not sure what word but you get what I mean. How does that work with kittypets and loners who join clans? Is the difference insignificant enough to not be relevant? Or something else? Or maybe I misunderstood?

Don't consider it canon to the Bonefall Rewrite.

It's an idea I like a lot for the Clan Culture series.

Though the Bonefall Rewrite uses my Clan Culture expansions, it has a thematic problem in the BFRW which talks a lot about politics and xenophobia, which is something I don't want an metatextual justification for. Make sense?

Anyway, the idea would go like this;

The Ancient Lake Cats are intelligent enough to think culturally and invent language. They're a subspecies of sorts, and over centuries they have occasionally been taken and crossed with other domestic cats.

The baseline intelligence of cats in this world is on the same level as dolphins and caledonian crows. Lake Cats are a step above, capable of true language and longterm planning.

Because Lake Cats have been crossed with other cats in the geographical area (I LOVE the idea that there were actually old tapestries of knights and pirates and such with lake cat companions), there are kittypets on the same level as Clan cats.

But not all of them. In fact they're quite rare, which is why all civilization stems from the Lake; they had the highest concentration of this kind of cat.

Billystorm would be an example of a cat with no Lake ancestry; capable of understanding commands and working cooperatively, but can't focus too long, doesn't make eloquent speeches, has trouble using words under stress or explaining his actions.

And they are invasive to an area, reflecting real life where cats are an incredibly destructive species. Clan Cats manage their environment, filling a niche similar to early hominids. Normal Cats are closer to actual cats, ecologically.

So kittypets and loners either join the local Clan and live by its rules, or are chased back to their humans. All cats can understand rules, but Billystorm has some problems understanding higher processes.

But that would be okay for him of course because he is loved and treated like a full member of SkyClan. They just make sure he's always on border patrol and hunts with a partner, no kitchen duty or thief jobs for him.

Make more sense?

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BB!Brushblaze

[ID: A grown version of Brushpaw from Warrior Cats. He is a ginger-and-white tabby cat with splotchy patches, a white butt, tail, paws, and 'bib'. He has yellow eyes with a distinct blob marking on his right side. He has a round notch in one ear.]

Because he's been coming up a lot lately, here he is! BB!Brushpaw is an ex-BloodClan cat who joins WindClan along with Snapper.

After the BloodClan Battle, Firestar opened up diplomatic negotiations in an attempt to see how much of Tigerstar's Impossible Deal the Clans could still honor. The answer was so simple as to be ridiculous; flowers, wood, novelty food. Things BloodClan can't get in the concrete alleys of Chelford. Leo and Snapper were only two of the traders who would regularly visit WindClan and ThunderClan.

Leo was head-over-paws for Onewhisker almost right away. He rarely went to ThunderClan, always trying to get chosen to go to the moor. He was so smitten, he never realized any of the red flags. Onewhisker wouldn't do public displays of affection, or tell his friends they were seeing each other, and when Leo floated the idea of joining the Clan... Onewhisker gave an affirmative, but not enthusiastic answer.

Tallstar decided to allow Leo and Snapper to join, but only if they went through apprenticeship as a formality. Onewhisker told Brushpaw that it's forbidden for warriors to be with apprentices, even if they are adults, and Brushpaw understood and respected that.

But it didn't get better.

Next, his ceremony was delayed over the destruction. His mentor, Mudclaw, even accused him of being a jinx and that he was bringing the humans to the moor. He went on the Great Journey forced to remain Brushpaw, Tallstar only having the strength to give Crowfeather his Honor Title and leaving him and Snappaw in the dust.

His scar is from fighting in the WindClan rebellion-- one of the rebels jumped on his back and tried to snap his neck. After the fight, Onestar gave the two their well-earned names; Brushblaze for the muirburn that Mudclaw sabotaged, and Snapstorm for the rain that put it out after.

When Onestar became leader, he changed, or... maybe it just revealed something that was always there, that Brushblaze didn't see. Either way, whatever they had was over.

Eventually, he became an ironic friend of Heathertail, helping her bring back tunneling. He died helping her and Breezepelt escape The Kin through a secret passage he constructed with Harespring, collapsing the tunnel so that they couldn't be followed.

Lots of info under the cut

Design & Meta Stuff

It bugs me how in Onestar's Concussion they copped out on the idea that Onewhisker was cheating on his lover with Smoke, by making it SUPER clear there was no overlap in the relationships. Soo instead yeah poor Brush was cheated on.

I feel like the fact that Canon!Brushpaw was a ginger tabby was supposed to invoke the image of Firestar, because the whole point is that "Firestar succeeded where Brushpaw failed" so like... I DESPERATELY tried to make sure Brushblaze is a ginger tabby who looks nothing like my Firestar lmao.

Total opposites, my Firestar is bright and skinny, Brush is dull and sturdy. Fire has no stripes and no white and Brush has stripes and white patches.

I gave him a spotty white tail for the irony of it looking like Darktail's but inverted.

I don't know if this makes sense but I tried to channel the energy of a gay dude who owns snakes.

Personality

Waaaaay smarter than you think, but can be a bit passionate and oblivious.

Prone to biting off more than he can chew and getting in situations above his head.

A yes-man, doesn't like saying no to people, especially when he feels like he can help.

Most ex-BloodClan cats look scary but are friendlier than they seem.

Surprises people with the way he casually remembers everything. Names, recipes, offhanded comments... say it once and it's in his head forever.

You really think that he's going to be a grump with that face, but it's far from the truth. He's tired, but super friendly.

History

Leo was a BloodClan Solver, a position that has to do with intellectual work.

Snapper was his assigned Problem, kind of like a BloodClan warrior.

His mother Bailey is actually one of the most respected Solvers in BloodClan. He didn't really like being in her shadow, though.

Looking back on it, Brushblaze is embarrassed about how quickly he was ready to commit to someone who, in hindsight, wasn't into it as much as he was.

They were dating but Onewhisker was... flaky. He didn't want to tell others about their relationship, never wanted public affection.

It was really obvious looking back on it that One was never brave enough to commit.

Snappaw and Brushpaw had to fight a lot of xenophobia to earn their place. Mudclaw's distrust of a cat he was supposed to train like an apprentice was a major factor in why Tallstar changed deputies so suddenly.

Unknown to Brush, Onewhisker had already rejected an old lover, Smoke, when he found out she was pregnant and wanted to join the Clan. He couldn't handle the shame of telling Brush he had been cheating AND the idea of waltzing into camp with a brazen kittypet lover.

Brush did eventually move on, but it took a long time. Onestar had Heathertail via honor-siring, never getting back into a romantic relationship again.

After this, he's very grudging of Onestar. Obeys him as a leader, but clearly dislikes him as an authority figure and as a person.

One of Onestar's many regrets.

One day in the Po3 Era, he overheard Heatherpaw and Breezepaw scream for help and came running

They were digging a tunnel, and Harepaw got buried

He pulled him out, and the three of them begged him to not tell their parents

Heatherpaw: "If my dad finds out he'll want to use this to do something stupid"

Brushblaze: "well... can't argue with that."

But he made them promise that the next time they dig that far down, where they could get hurt by a cave-in, they would come get him.

He became something like a safety friend, helping them work out how to reinforce a tunnel, doing good estimates of how to dig from Point A to Point B.

Onestar, of course, did eventually find out about tunnels... from Sedgepaw, boasting about the naturally-occurring ones under the Lake. It sure did give the four of them a scare that he'd learned about their little resurrection of tunneling as a practice.

Brushblaze eventually found love again; ironically, it was with Whitetail!

They had two kittens; Galekit and Smokekit.

He found it REALLY weird though that Onestar was so... aggressive? About Smokekit

"you didn't have to do this," said Onestar, glaring at the baby.

Brushblaze blinked several times. "....have a child???"

He would learn the truth less than a month later, when Darktail brought The Kin to the lake

Breezepelt joined quickly, and Heathertail went with curiosity when it was revealed that Darktail was her half-brother.

Harespring, deputy at the time, knew that his childhood friends were in danger. Him, Brushblaze, Crowfeather, and a few others immediately started digging to help save their Clanmates

Brushblaze's final act was shoving The Kin escapees in the tunnel, lagging behind, and collapsing the tunnel on himself and their pursuers.

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Do u have any voice claims for BB ?

The only voice claims I have are a dogged insistence that every single "dub" actor should have an accent that comes from a region north of the Severn, especially the smartest ones like Jessy, Bumble, etc.

Accent classism is really bad in the UK and Northern ones often get stereotyped as stupid and simple, kinda comparable to the US and how Appalachian accents get bullied even though they're super cool and deserve RESPECT.

Except the himbo, Billystorm, he can be posh. Only him. Billystorm Alone can come from London.

I do have a bunch of songs I associate with BB cats tho