morcantinon

[morcantinon]

imagine you had no idea what an elephant was and your first exposure to them was hannibal riding them across the alps. youd think you were in hell.

[morcantinon]

They call me Johnny Six-Bowls. No, I don't smoke weed, it's - yeah, I know. It's cause when I cook I need a buncha those little bowls to put my stuff in. You know, cut up veggies and stuff. What's the word. Mise en place. Yeah. So I gotta have a bunch of em with stuff all prepped before I start. Elsewise it's all chaos. Anyway. You here to duel? Or should I give you head

[morcantinon]

I wish I had more to say about Nancy than “it’s good”, but….it’s good.

[morcantinon]

Random headcanon: the reason that Peach and Bowser don’t seem to get a lot of respect in some Super Mario games is because the Mushroom Kingdom is kind of a rural backwater and isn’t terribly important or influential politically, so people tend to regard Bowser as a C-list villain for being so hung up on such an insignificant conquest. Nobody really expects Bowser to be a serious threat – that would be like expecting a guy whose main claim to fame is repeatedly failing to conquer Wyoming to be a serious threat – so they get taken by surprise every single time.

[morcantinon]

I certainly do keep it on me

[morcantinon]

“Ask medieval historian Michael McCormick what year was the worst to be alive, and he’s got an answer: “536.” Not 1349, when the Black Death wiped out half of Europe. Not 1918, when the flu killed 50 million to 100 million people, mostly young adults. But 536. In Europe, “It was the beginning of one of the worst periods to be alive, if not the worst year,” says McCormick, a historian and archaeologist who chairs the Harvard University Initiative for the Science of the Human Past. A mysterious fog plunged Europe, the Middle East, and parts of Asia into darkness, day and night—for 18 months. “For the sun gave forth its light without brightness, like the moon, during the whole year,” wrote Byzantine historian Procopius. Temperatures in the summer of 536 fell 1.5°C to 2.5°C, initiating the coldest decade in the past 2300 years. Snow fell that summer in China; crops failed; people starved. The Irish chronicles record “a failure of bread from the years 536–539.” Then, in 541, bubonic plague struck the Roman port of Pelusium, in Egypt. What came to be called the Plague of Justinian spread rapidly, wiping out one-third to one-half of the population of the eastern Roman Empire and hastening its collapse, McCormick says. Historians have long known that the middle of the sixth century was a dark hour in what used to be called the Dark Ages, but the source of the mysterious clouds has long been a puzzle. Now, an ultraprecise analysis of ice from a Swiss glacier by a team led by McCormick and glaciologist Paul Mayewski at the Climate Change Institute of The University of Maine (UM) in Orono has fingered a culprit. At a workshop at Harvard this week, the team reported that a cataclysmic volcanic eruption in Iceland spewed ash across the Northern Hemisphere early in 536. Two other massive eruptions followed, in 540 and 547. The repeated blows, followed by plague, plunged Europe into economic stagnation that lasted until 640, when another signal in the ice—a spike in airborne lead—marks a resurgence of silver mining, as the team reports in Antiquity this week.”

— “Why 536 was the worst year to be alive” from Science magazine (via principleofplenitude)

[morcantinon]

dont talk to me if you don’t know that this, recruits, is a 20-kilo ferrous slug. Feel the weight! Every five seconds, the main gun of an Everest-class dreadnought accelerates one to 1.3 percent of light speed! It impacts with the force of a 38-kiloton bomb! That is three times the yield of the city buster dropped on Hiroshima back on Earth. That means: Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest son of a bitch in space. Now! Serviceman Burnside! What is Newton’s First Law?

[morcantinon]

do you ever start writing a comment on the internet and then think “oh what the fuck am i going on about” and delete it

[morcantinon]

seen so many posts that are like “I was so confused when I saw all this posting about some non-existent movie “Goncharov” like it was real” I wasn’t. this happens 5 times a week. my dash is routinely filled to the brim with passionate analysis of absurd-sounding movies and tv shows I have never heard of. I never for a second doubted the existence of a russian mafia movie set in italy with massive numbers of bizarrely named characters and no cohesive understanding of the movie’s themes or plot until I saw a post saying to tag it as unreality. this is tumblr. this happens daily. not one thought crossed my mind except “ha, looks like a few of my mutuals have a new hyperfixation.” this is what tumblr has done to me. you could tell me there’s a new tv show about dolphins with french accents living as royalty in victorian england while secretly starting a cult to renew the worship of the greek gods and the shipping discourse is intense and I would simply think “sounds legit” and keep scrolling

[morcantinon]

[morcantinon]

Imagine if they find Luigi innocent and he has to go through the rest of his life as That Guy Who Got Turbodoxxed That One Time Because Everyone Thought He Was An Assassin.

[morcantinon]

good read for teachers.

[morcantinon]

I was about to pen “My moleskine is the new tumblr” in my little black book but I lost control of my hand and drew a complicated mandala that started an energy fire

[morcantinon]

But do ghosts believe in YOU?

Sometimes when I'm in the supermarket I go to the spice aisle and show the ghosts of my ancestors how well we're doing based on the amount of pepper we could buy for what amounts to pocket change. I assume therefore that they think I'm doing great.

[morcantinon]

Mood: I no longer dislike Mondays, I'm mature now. I dislike the whole week.

[morcantinon]

best thing i ever accepted about people is that most people are just kind of gross like, physically