mooncleaver
mooncleaver
percy jackson's gf (real)
336 posts
𓏲 ๋࣭ ꕤ ۰🌷⸼ ۫. 19. she/her masterlist 'you got it from here'
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Family Day at Bat Burger
ღ summary: Jason’s receding hairline is the least of your concerns when Damian is seconds away from detonating the explosives he planted in Bat Burger. 
჌ pairing: Bruce Wayne x Batmom!reader
჌ warnings: Damian. Again. But also Jason this time. Bruce eating a burger with a knife and fork.
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Friday was like your own personal battlefield. Most would argue that it is the best day of the week as the beginning of the weekend. But to you, Friday is the day you have to bust your ass off to get your family together. 
Normally, the Waynes have a designated "family day," in which everybody must be present in the same room, spending time with each other like normal people. No interruptions, no work calls, and no justice business (when there are other available heroes to fill the spot). Friday's usually the day for that. But between Dick settling in as a police officer in Blßdhaven, Jason occupied with Gotham's crime rings, Timmy with the Neon Knights program at WE, and Damian out being Robin with Batman, this month has been terribly busy. It's hard enough to properly schedule things when all of your birds lived in Wayne Manor, but now that they've started pursuing their lives out there, you feel like you're assembling impossible puzzle pieces. 
But finally, the universe decided to hear out your pleas. 
This week, the chosen destination was a Bat Burger down Mortimer Avenue. Done at the request of your eldest son Dick, who's back in town and claims that he's been missing the greasy quarter pounders from the fast food chain. 
Bruce starts to go over every possible moment he could've done wrong by you in the past month when you let him know of the location, wondering if this was some kind of divine punishment for all his sins. You found it funny that he acted as if going to Bat Burger was Defcon level 1 torture. 
Your husband is used to taking you to all sorts of distinguished restaurants for fancy date nights and sometimes for daytime drop-ins for a quick brunch. He did have quite the particular palate. But this? A place that is crowded like no other during rush hour and where people will inevitably stare at his family?
Bruce could do hours rounding galas and making laughter with Gotham’s elites but not feel comfortable sitting down at a Bat Burger for 15 minutes. 
The morning of family day, you, Tim, and Damian took the car together, while Dick and Jason went on their own, as they had their own apartments in the city. Bruce was going to meet all of you at the restaurant because he had a prior meeting with the WE board that morning. 
When all of you arrived—save for your husband, who only did 5 minutes later—the boys immediately beelined for the fifth booth down by the window. It was where your family usually sat, and it had lots of core memories attached to it. Dick volunteered to order for his siblings, declaring something about big brother duties. The boys shrugged it off, happy for the help. They listed down their orders while you politely declined, wanting to wait for your husband. 
Bruce was still in his suit when he arrived, approaching your table all cashmere grey and pristine from head to toe. He greeted you with a soft kiss and ruffled Damian’s hair, who grumbled but didn’t shy away. He looked the tiniest bit uncomfortable. Your husband was rarely a fan of crowded, public places under his persona, and it'd always been like this since you could remember. 
This time though, he was particularly grumpy because of Bat Burger's newest menu, which was a collaboration with Super Burger, following the highly anticipated Super Bowl match between the Gotham Knights and the Metropolis Meteors. Everybody donned their own merchandise to reflect who they were supporting, with the majority backing this city. Gothamites, despite all the danger they were constantly exposed to, were very proud people. 
But Bruce? Oh Bruce didn't like this at all. Putting aside that they had a villain column in the menu, he found it weird enough that they were plastering his and his kids' faces all over the place. But now Superman? Hell no. He couldn't have that in his city.
They even had paper headbands for each hero depending on if you bought the Batman or the Superman menu. And it bugged him a lot, especially since you mentioned wanting to try the Superman special, which meant that you were going to wear Clark's face on your head. (Why’d he assume that you were going to wear it? You still did, though. You thought it was hilarious.)
He didn’t bother to hide his disdain, already acting like a grumpy old man when you dragged him to the counter. "I cannot believe we are actually here. Where they sell Jokerized fries as if he isn't a homicidal maniac who'll kill us all just to laugh over our graves."
You rolled your eyes at your husband. "Be nice, Bruce. You know aside from the whole villain thing, I think it's cute."
"That they've commercialized our line of work?" He retorted quietly, turning to face you with a lifted eyebrow. 
"That they've turned it into something more positive for everyone to enjoy." You squeezed his bicep and jerked your head to the probably-18-year-old manning the cashier a few feet in front. "I mean, look at him! He's serving people with a Batman costume on!"
"He looks like he's counting down the days till he gets to meet his maker."
"Bruce!" A snort made its way out of your nose. At the same time, you whipped your head to the man beside you as you lightly swatted his chest with the back of your hand. 
Right on cue, the person in front of you finished their order and you were met face-to-face with the young man who was “counting down the days till he gets to meet his maker.”
You waited for Bruce to speak and were met with only silence. When you turned to look, he was just staring down at the poor man—who you couldn’t figure out if he was terrified or just didn’t care at all. Most likely the latter. You rolled your eyes at your husband. He could be insufferable at times. 
“Mark, right? Hi. We’d like to order….”
Back at the table, Dick had just returned, balancing two trays on his hand. He was matching you by wearing the Superman headband, which later pricked at Bruce's skin like an annoying mosquito. Dick never said it out loud, but he did have favoritism towards Uncle Clark. 
He laid down the food in front of his brothers before settling down on the left booth, dibbing the spot beside you and Bruce as his “first child privileges.” 
Dick got himself a Super-Burger, Tim asked for Robin Nuggets and a cup of pop, and Jason, a Bat-Burger Deluxe with a side of Jokerized fries. Damian—who originally asked for a Bat-Burger—got handed a Bat-Mite Meal instead. 
Damian physically recoiled at the box placed in front of him, scowling as if it had personally offended him. "Richard, I did not ask for a Bat-Mite Meal." He crossed his arms, staring up at Dick with barely hidden contempt. Even more so after seeing his older brother wearing that ridiculous paper headband. 
Dick wasn't the slightest bit deterred. 
"It comes with a toy." He simply shrugged in response, immediately going back to unwrapping his burger. 
"Tt. How patronizing." Damian griped. Despite that, he still accepted the meal and dug in for the toy. Nonchalantly, obviously. He couldn't let his brothers know he didn't actually mind getting the kids' meal. But when he revealed the toy in hand, he was disappointed, to say the least. Of course he had to get a Red Hood one. As if having a meal combo named after him didn't inflate Jason's ego enough. 
The young boy haphazardly placed the figure beside him on the table, rolling his eyes to signal his disdain. Even if he secretly wanted to bring it home to complete his Gotham hero's figure collection, he couldn't go back on his word after saying he didn't want the Red Hood toy. He had an image to uphold. 
Jason, the ever-loving menace that he is, was already eyeing this as a big opportunity.
Meanwhile across from them, you and Bruce settled down with your food, and the first thing that came out of Dick’s mouth was very loud judging targeted at Bruce for eating his burger with a knife and fork. He should be used to it at this point being the kid who grew up with you the longest, but the sight is just absolutely ridiculous. 
He still had a mouthful of burger when he commented on the older man's eating habits, dramatically calling out, "Dad, you're kidding? It's been like- years since Alfred let us eat fast food again." 
It was true. Some time after you adopted Jason, Alfred gave up on banning fast food inside the manor. He was always an advocate for balanced, homemade meals—especially concerning their particular lifestyles—but after one too many sneaked in late-night takeout (which he always knew about), he relented. This then opened many opportunities to eat cheap, greasy but comforting fast food, along with the chance to escape Alfred’s watchful eye over their table manners. But despite the many years it's been, Bruce still stuck to what he claimed as the "proper" way of eating food. 
Bruce ignored Dick, continuing to slice the burger in half using metal utensils. "It's just a cheeseburger, Richard."
"Exactly! It's a cheeseburger. From Bat Burger."
Tim didn't look up from sipping his Zesti soda and added, "He's basically calling all of us uncivilized monkeys."
You decided to save your husband from your kids’ onslaught of teasing, reaching over to pat his clothed bicep and hooked your chin on his shoulder.
“Now my little birds, play nice with your father.” You said sympathetically. Dick and Tim thought Bruce had won you over until you gave a small wink in their direction before cooing sarcastically, “Old habits die hard don't they, Mr. Raised-by-the-butler?”
Your kids didn’t bother to hide their laughter; Tim even fist-bumped you with a prideful ‘Nice one, Mom.’
But before your husband could defend himself, the four of you were interrupted by your youngest raising his voice.
"Todd, did you steal my prize?"
Jason had proudly snatched Damian's Red Hood action figure, assuming the boy didn't want it. He hid it on his lap and looked away innocently, but not even 5 seconds later Damian noticed that it was missing. Of course he would. That was his toy. And the only person stupid enough to do this (other than Drake) would be the idiot sitting next to him, doing an extremely poor job at hiding his glee. 
"You imbecile!" Damian at this point was already up on his knees to face the older boy, using the table to support himself. He glared harshly at Jason, a scowl etching deeply into his face. "The toy is mine!"
"The toy isth mine." Jason merely mocked him back, which only served to fuel Damian even more. This was most definitely his favorite thing to do. The young assassin was just so easy to provoke.
Damian seethed in silence and hunched over before looking dead straight into Jason's eyes, threatening him in a very real way. "Give that back, or we will engage in a duel." 
"Damian, sit down. Now." The moment was broken just before it escalated when Bruce activated his "dad voice" and stared pointedly at the young boy, using the table knife on his right hand to point at his son. Not one to disobey his father, he flopped back down to the seat with a huff.
"And Jason, give your brother his toy back." Jason didn't exactly like following Bruce's orders, but he gave the Red Hood toy back anyway once he saw that you were raising an expectant brow at him beside your husband.
Still, he obviously needed to get the last word. "Why want the toy when you’ve got the real thing right here?"
Damian was quick to shoot back at him. 
"Why would anyone prefer you over the toy?” He glared at Jason before snatching the toy, taking a moment to observe it before finishing, “At least this one doesn’t have a receding hairline."
The table went silent, save for Tim who was trying to hold back his laughter.
"Dick, secure the fries." You muttered, exasperated. Your eldest nodded solemnly before dragging the tray towards your side of the booth, taking this entirely seriously. Damian has… a history of grabbing whatever is within his vicinity to use as a weapon. The food on your dining table has been a victim of this one too many times. You're not taking any chances this time.
Across you, Tim already had his phone out to record the two bickering yet again. Over the years, he had developed the very special ability of catching just the perfect moment before a fight between any of the boys broke out—especially ones including Damian, oh he had years worth of those clips.
"What? What’d you just say to me, two-bit?" The Red Hood whipped his head to face Damian, daring him to repeat his words.
Damian, like the little shit he is, delivered exactly what Jason asked and slowly enunciated every syllable. "I said, at least the toy doesn’t have a receding hairline."
Jason looked genuinely concerned at the comment. He whipped his head towards Bruce first with an accusatory stare, as if saying, ‘This is your blood son?’. The older man dragged a hand over the lower part of his face, leaning his elbow on the table to stabilize himself. It didn’t matter how much he tried to hide it, anyone could tell that he was extremely entertained. An offended Jason then turned to the next best option, Dick, who was sitting beside Bruce. He clutched at his hair like his life depended on it. 
“Dick, look at my hair. It’s fine, right?” You would’ve laughed if you didn’t notice the straight panic in his voice. 
Damian looked awfully smug that his older brother walked right into that trap. He clasped his hands together in a conspiratorial manner before sealing the nail in the coffin by saying, “Don’t worry, Todd. I’m sure Alfred can teach you the lost art of the comb-over.”
That completely set Jason off. He froze in his seat before slowly turning his head to threaten the green-eyed boy. 
“I’m killing you now, Damian. This is happening.”
“Many have tried. Many with much more hair.” He replied ominously. 
Tim was practically on the edge of his seat, sliding down the booth as his body shook in silent cackles, phone still recording the argument. 
Dick looked mildly concerned. He knew as much that Jason and Damian were the two people who would genuinely act on their words—especially ones about violence. Hell sometimes he couldn’t even tell the difference between them just saying shit for shit or when it was actually true. 
And a fight breaking out between those two? At a Bat Burger? He could kiss the perfectly harmonious image of the Wayne family goodbye. (Which was already down the drain ever since Damian and Tim fought at a charity gala. This is a forbidden topic amongst the Waynes.)
Thankfully, the moment was broken when you started tapping loudly on the wooden table with the tips of your nails. They snapped their heads in your direction at the speed of light and froze in their tracks. Your kids knew better than to cross you even further. That tapping, as they’ve experienced, often heralded your disappointed lectures.
“We are in public, boys.” You stared them down, and your two sons had the decency to look guilty. “Please, save the tussling for when we get back home. Preferably inside the cave.”
Jason took the silence as a chance to defend himself. No way he’s letting that little brat get away with trash-talking his hair. 
“Did you hear what he said to me ma'?” It’s quite adorable that even in his 20s, you can still see the little boy inside of him. The little tattle-tale that used to run into your arms whenever something bad happened to him. 
You took a second to chew your burger and swallowed.
“Yes, Jason. I did. And no you do not have a receding hairline. Now both of you hush,” You wagged a finger at their faces before shamelessly finishing, “Momma needs some alone time with this double-decker Super-Burger.”
Tim snorted at your comment while Dick let out a full-on laugh. Bruce, with his secretly jealous nature, pretended not to hear the last bit of your sentence.
He took a napkin to wipe the crumbs off his face before reaching out to rub a hand down your back soothingly. Bruce pressed a lingering kiss on the top of your head, voice drowning beneath the ruckus.
“Never a dull moment.” Your husband muttered as he shook his head, only meant for your ears. A content hum is the only thing he received back. You were too engrossed in your burger. In front of him his children had already moved on, now talking about their joint plan on taking down Bane. 
Life with the Waynes consisted of many ups and downs, multiple times a day, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.
There was really never a dull moment in your life when not even a minute later you heard a quiet thud beneath the table, followed by Jason’s pained yelp. 
“Ow! The hell—“ He glared at Damian, wincing before barely making a move towards the boy, only to be stopped by Damian grabbing his half-eaten burger and shoving it right onto Jason’s cheek. Just as you predicted he would do. 
“Eat this!” 
Jason retaliated by taking advantage of his height to pull down Damian’s hoodie, muffling the boy’s head under the fabric. 
”HAHA—” That was Tim. And that was also Tim’s phone hitting the floor after Damian slapped it away.
“Get your ugly mug out of my face Drake—“
Yeah. You wouldn’t have it any other way. 
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Again with these funny ass comic scenes you guys. I freakin love the dynamic between Damian and Jason. Tim ofc catching strays too lol.
And also I was inspired by a comment on this Pinterest post, so thank you hilarious stranger !!
dividers @hyuneskkami ; my masterlist
@ pls don't repost or feed my works into ai thaaank you
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mooncleaver ¡ 10 hours ago
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this is so kind, thank you for including me among these amazing writers!! 🤍
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bruce wayne - batman
masterlist • dc • 08/18/25
˚‧⁺ ・ ˖ · ୨ৎ recs II gif credit - @/ohmovie
here are some bruce wayne stories i’ve read, loved, and reblogged. all the admiration for the writers who share their talent so generously. please be sure to read the warnings on each fic. and if you enjoy them, let the author know by a comment, reblog, or both! ♡
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ꨄ︎ fright I @hollandorks
in the midst of investigating a drug that kills people with their own fear, Bruce is drugged.
ꨄ︎ in flames I @/hollandorks
The reader encounters the Batman when stealing information from a murdered man one night. The next day at a meeting to merge her business with Wayne Enterprises, she meets Bruce Wayne for the first time--and he has a cut on his face exactly like the one she gave the Batman. When sparks fly, will they go down in flames?
ꨄ︎ masterlist I @letaliabane
a masterlist of battinson
ꨄ︎ contingency plan I @devilfic
ꨄ︎ ghosts I @/devilfic
there’s a split second between dreaming and waking where the dream exists in the real world: the tender loss of a dream unrealized, and the relief of a nightmare severed. your nightmare is still clinging to you.
ꨄ︎ good grief I @/devilfic
you and batman have something special going on. obviously, people notice.
ꨄ︎ flirty I @fluentmoviequoter
Your husband Bruce never stops flirting with you, and everyone, in Gotham and beyond, knows it.
ꨄ︎ million dollar man I @ahqkas
bruce met you through a dating app (his sons’ doing, really) and the temptation to invite you over for christmas is getting harder to resist
ꨄ︎ talk I @ichorai
it’d been years since you died. bruce stood silent in front of your grave, hair damp from the cold rain. you approached him from behind, tipping your umbrella forward just enough so the tears of the sky would stop mingling with his own.
ꨄ︎ family tree I @/ichorai
bruce didn't think he'd find family in you, of all people.
ꨄ︎ the bat is in love! …with mrs.wayne? I @lucylockets
in which the Justice League notice that Batman is infatuated with Bruce Wayne’s wife, and need to help him get over her (impossible)
ꨄ︎ the bat in love I @ilianasbruce
who would have known Batman was in love with Bruce Wayne’s wife?
ꨄ︎ a wife’s desires — a husband’s insecurity I @neellscapsule
you feel as if your husband doesn't want you anymore, as he ignores every attempt of seduction. until you take the secret weapon and your only feeling besides desire: anger.
ꨄ︎ a place where you aren’t you pt2 I @/neellscrapsule
when a fight breaks because of a broken rule, damian says something that he will regret later . . . or not that later, actually.
ꨄ︎ wayne’s secretary pt2 pt3 pt4 pt5 I @/neellscrapsule
working as bruce wayne's secretary was never an easy job, specially when you're terribly in love with him and he doesn't dare look back. 
ꨄ︎ the bats wife pt2 I @athenalvss
Some members of the league are still surprised by the way the Dark Knight's wife looks.
ꨄ︎ tomorrow? I @/athenalvss
On his first patrol as Robin, Dick can't keep his mouth shut and tries to set his mentor up with Detective Gordon's assistant, but there are things the boy doesn't know.
ꨄ︎ all it takes is one bad day I @iydiamartinx
After a spending a year in a loveless marriage, you find your husband with another woman.
ꨄ︎ pull me in pt2 I @prettiest-thing-in-the-morgue
due to Bruce distancing himself from reading and seeing other women - batfam has to watch their mom willow away.
ꨄ︎ if you’re done with your ex, move on to the next I @supermenz
Being rejected from Metropolis University? Humbling. Your boyfriend of four years dumping you a year later thanks to his dead parents? Even worse. But when your friend tries to get you out of your dorm after two weeks spent bed-rotting and takes you to a photoshoot audition — "Just to try something new!" — you find yourself with a lot of attention you didn't want and a billionaire playboy on your tail.
ꨄ︎ request pt2 I @makethatelevenrings
ꨄ︎ wrong pile I @lawboysammyy
alfred puts a scandalous piece of clothing in the wrong laundry pile.
ꨄ︎ perfect night I @mooncleaver
Bruce is late for patrol. Damian doesn't have the patience of a saint.
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mooncleaver ¡ 3 days ago
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clark kent with THIS hair....just- yes. YES.
gifs by @hoult-nicholas
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mooncleaver ¡ 4 days ago
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Perfect Night
჌ summary: Bruce is late for patrol. Damian doesn't have the patience of a saint.
჌ pairing: Bruce Wayne x fem!reader
჌ warnings: Damian. (<3)
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"Father. Wake up."
If anyone were to see a child dressed in a Robin costume squatting on their headboard in the dead of night, staring at their sleeping figure with unnatural silence, they'd probably freak. But not you or Bruce, who's lovingly laid in each other's arms with years worth of experiences under your belt.
Bruce had fallen fast asleep after coming home from Wayne Enterprises, careless with his attire which was still simply strewn messily on a hanger by the closet. He was only dressed in his boxers, one heavy arm slung over your waist while the other pillowed his head, your own tucked right under his chin. The absence of the usual hardness present on his face made him look peaceful, relaxed. His mouth was opened slightly, soft breathes puffing out a steady rhythm. If you were awake right now you’d have your phone out to take a picture.
Usually the vigilante is quite punctual with his schedule, but it had been a tough week for him. One which included not one but two galas, a criminal breakout from Arkham and one nasty visit from the Joker.
You recall him muttering something about "resting his eyes for a bit" before patrol, but it feels like age is catching up to him because he's well passed out beside you without a care in the world.
Damian must've been too impatient to let the man bring himself down the cave, so he resolved it by approaching his father himself.
But of course, Damian couldn't just wake him up normally. The young boy was bent down right onto Bruce's face, gloved fingers physically prying apart the older man's eyelids to show a peek of blue underneath. And Bruce with his killer instincts—even when half-conscious—snapped right up at the intrusions, only relaxing slightly when he was greeted by Damian's masked face. Naturally, he sported an irritated face, as if his father had inconvenienced him by being asleep.
Another perfectly normal night at the Wayne household.
"Come on, let's go, patrol time. The streets are waiting." Damian insisted, still with his fingers all up in Bruce's eye. The older man blinked out into the darkness of his bedroom, making shape of blurry dark eyes, nostrils sticking out and a pair of eyebrows that looked like his own.
Damian was practically vibrating with energy, Titus panting heavily on the side of the bed as if mimicking his owner. He was always like this ever since he took the mantle of Robin. The first to be up for patrol, the first to stand in the Batcave with full gear on. Always so eager to be the one fighting crime. He had that same thirst for justice like all your other kids did.
Bruce let out a low grumble, sighing deeply as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He remembered the weight of you in his arms and peeled you off gently, keeping an eye on your face to make sure none of this ruckus awoke you from your well-deserved slumber. He would much rather stay with you in the very expensive sheets he exclusively bought for the master bedroom, but he equally wouldn't let Damian run around Gotham alone. Despite whatever reason he came up with each week to go out as vigilante alone, Damian is his son before he is Robin. No amount of training and Assassin 101s could take away the fact that Gotham doesn't discriminate when it comes to showing no mercy.
So with a resigned sigh, he ran a hand through his tussled dark hair, the motion doing absolutely nothing to tame the mess. Without even looking, he reached his left arm out to point at the door, muttering a tired but firm, "Cave."
Damian leaped from the wooden headboard, yellow cape bellowing behind him and landing with a sound thud. Though he was light on his feet, Bruce still whipped his head around to warn him sternly, mindful of his sleeping wife beside him.
"Quietly, Damian. Don't wake your mother up."
He was just about to check on you when he noticed the dog not hot on its heels behind Damian, followed by the quiet croak of your voice.
"Dami?" You stirred, hearing muffled voices of what you could guess as your husband and son.
Well, neither Bruce nor Damian woke you up, because Titus was already in front of you, panting and licking your cheek.
Even if usually well-behaved, the Great Dane had a certain affection for you. You and Alfred, aside from his owner, were the two people constantly around him around since he was a small puppy. Especially when the boys were out doing their nocturnal activities, the two of you would feed him treats and play with him.
Before you could turn around to confirm who the voices belonged to, you felt the heat of pants right in front of your face. One that suspiciously smelled like beef and dog treats. Titus seemed to respond even more eagerly seeing that you were awake, pushing his head onto yours as he sniffed the hand that laid in front of you. "Oh hello Titus.."
Damian, like the good son he is, stopped right in his tracks and immediately responded to your call. He zoomed past to your side of the bed, bending down to your level when you reached a hand out.
"Ummi." He greeted, melting under your palm on his head. You smiled sleepily at your boy. Despite the darkness tempting to swallow you back up into sweet dreams, you could still make out the bright green of his eye mask and the silhouette of his spiky hair. And especially the special lift at the corner of his lips that only showed when you showered him with affection—like he was proud to be noticed by you. You love him so much. He's just like a little cat.
A stubborn, homicidal little cat.
As much of a heartwarming scene this was, Bruce could tell that you were nearly fully awake. It wasn't helping that Titus was getting louder with his excitement, pawing the floor while his collar rustled loudly. Even if his life felt a hundred times better when you waited up for him to come home, he didn't like when you skipped out on resting time.
He needed Damian and Titus out of the room stat, but it didn't seem like the former noticed, too busy being fawned on by his mother.
Bruce stared down at his son with just enough intensity that Damien could feel a definite weight on the side of his face. When he turned, they engaged in a staring contest when Damien started fighting back with defiance. Prideful little thing. Once he finally piped down with a quiet "tt" (which Bruce couldn't bother to scold him for), the man jerked his head to signal for Robin to leave for the cave.
Damian for once, happily obliged Bruce's command.
He didn't forget to give your hand a squeeze before he left, getting up with a newfound vigor as Titus bounded behind him.
Immediately the older man leaned forward to settle his weight next to you, one bare arm finding the strewn duvet to cover your body before softly landing beside your shoulder.
"Go back to sleep, sweetheart. We're leaving for patrol." He whispered gently, closing in on your face to nose at your cheek.
You were already back on your side at this point, sleep starting to set back in once the room quieted down. When you felt his breath on your cheek, you lazily reached a hand to land on the side of his stubbled face and gave it a soft pat. "Oh.. okay. Be careful. Love you both."
Bruce felt your arm slacken and smiled at the way your voice trailed off into small breathes. Cute. He lifted his left hand to take your palm off his face, pressing a small kiss to the center before doing the same to your temple. He took the chance to pause and breathe in the moment, staring at you with deep, unabashed love. With reverence. As if the mere sight of you slumbering could solve all the problems of this world and fight the darkness that plagued it.
He placed one more soft kiss to your cheek, promising his and Damian's safe return before he got up from the bed, knees cracking in a weak protest.
"We love you too."
And off he goes, Gotham University shirt only halfway on, trudging behind his eager son to go fight crime while his wife slept soundly at home. Maybe not a normal one, but it was a perfect night at the Wayne household.
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CHAT WE LIVE FROM GOTHAM CITY. Thought this comic scene was really cute!
dividers @hyuneskkami @strangergraphics
@ pls don't repost or feed my works into ai thaaank you
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mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
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😆😆 this is absolutely canon by the way
Love's Quiet Surrender
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To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
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"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
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WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
AW SHUCKSS 😭 im super super happy that you liked it!! it means so much to me.
and also welcome to the club sistaaa! i was genuinely hysteric in my seat at the theatres when i saw him on that goddamn motorcycle..
Love's Quiet Surrender
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To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
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"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
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WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
maan me too. i still remember how excited i was writing this after watching way of water 😆
thank youu for reading and i am happy you liked it!
What Does Your Heart Tell You?
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what does a na'vi healer and a sky person have in common? well only that eywa brought them together to find peace and love within each other's arms. and maybe because they have the same, stubborn and strong-willed heart
჌  pairing: jake sully x fem!na'vi!reader
჌  warnings: me being lovesick MOTHER I LOVE THAT MAN!, denial, like a whole dumptruck of writing errors
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Jake Sully's arrival into the Omaticaya clan had been both a blessing a curse.
Well, you were more inclined to believe it had been a blessing in comparison to the other Na'vi of your clan, who would not hesitate to bare their teeth at the 'demon'. Perhaps it was just you among select few Na'vi—those select few being.. innocent children whose curiosity knows no bounds—who had thought his arrival was what Eywa intended it to be. And somewhere inside your heart you knew letting him in was the right choice, but the other was telling you of a great storm brewing upon pandora.
You could feel it through the restless Ikran, how their screeches and squawks echoed just a little louder and how their wings would bristle at the slightest sound. Through the Pa'li's stomps from their hooves that would shake the ground with an unspoken force, or through the Syaksyuk who would retreat to the canopies with hurried steps. Though, you tried to push the shadow looming over your head away, focusing on the buzzing present with the new sky person stumbling into your home.
It was quite the surprise when your good friend Neytiri brought a sky person to your clan. From where you were all gathered you couldn't see his face clearly and yet, you could tell he wasn't one of you.
By the way he was dressed, the way he was moving; the shakiness of his steps as if his tail was knotting on his feet, and from the way he speaks. The moment he opened that mouth of his, you winced at how.. foreign, it was. Not in a sense that you didn't understand, no, but in his manner; the way he has yet to learn about the culture of the Na'vi and just how dangerous he was in the eyes of your people. He would have surely already been dead at the hands of Tsu'tey if it were not for Eywa speaking and Neytiri defending him.
When the princess protested about being his teacher, a part of you resonated with her. How is it to feel like you’re taking care of a toddler, one who is just learning how to walk and speak, only taking its first steps and yet.. whines so much. But the other part of your soaring heart which you tried to silence for your own sake was painfully intrigued by him; JakeSully, he called himself. There was something about him, something that shined past his foolish behavior that made your heart beat louder in your ears. Some fascinating thing that made your tail swish in anticipation.
Sensing an end to the abrupt meeting you had looked up, trying to catch a fleeting glimpse of the sky person and you were just as surprised as said sky person to see him staring back, something uncannily familiar clicking inside of you. Though it was gone the moment you looked away, ready to go back to the comfort your home, heart still beating wildly at the galvanizing exchange. You hoped you could see him again. In.. better circumstances.
It seems that your hopes were answered because you in fact, did, see JakeSully after that brief glance. Really it wasn't anything official. You would see him in passing when he would try to make tsaheylu with his pa'li—wincing yet again when he would fall off it—or sometimes when Neytiri would teach him to use a bow before actually venturing in Pandora's forest to find prey. Not only that, but after the chief's daughter's very.. demanding training, Jake would often find himself seeking for aid to bandage up some of his wounds. They weren't too bad really, just minor cuts and bruises that decorated his skin, or red marks from wrongly gripping his wooden bow.
And that was where you came in. After Ngeha had stepped back as the head healer for the clan—a well deserved retirement, bless that woman for carrying the weight of all the injured Na'vi over the last decades—she had appointed you, her assistant you could call it, as the new head healer. It was such an honor to finally step onto the trail she has left behind, to help the Na'vi when they needed. It felt good to be able to heal and to bring something life; you were so sure that it was your true purpose.
So it really was like fate when you met JakeSully that day he was back from his earlier days of training. He came in nastily battered (most coming from the dirt on his face, actually), some cuts and scrapes here and there. Nothing you couldn't help him with. Fortunately for him, he had one of the best healers in the clan at his service.
You remember the first time he entered the spacious hut of your workplace. It smelt earthy, like a concoction of the most potent herbs creating a mossy wood scent, hints of fresh petrichor and a sprinkle of something floral and oriental that would fly away in whiffs if one were to get close. It was marvelously calming, like the place and what was inside an extension of the forest itself. He was carefully trying to enter, calling out a distinctive and deep 'hello?' to catch someones attention.
Your ears had perked up the moment his voice echoed in your infirmary and when you revealed yourself to him, you were met with one of the funniest sights you have seen in a while. He was covered with thick, goopy mud, dragging down from his hairline to his feet, digging into his skin as if it was trying to seep in. He was attempting to shake some of it off and sadly failing at doing so.
Your silently echoing footsteps had snapped him out of his stupor and prompted him to find its source, irises raking your figure from bottom to top; you felt a wave of shivers running down the length of your spine.
‘I see you.’ he finally seemed to get out of whatever daze he was in, showing you a gesture he had been taught by Neytiri. He was looking at you carefully, scared that he might get his ass handed to him again if he made one wrong move. And at that point you had wanted to say something about that,—about how you were not going to spike his head where he stood—but you quickly went into healer-mode when you saw a small spurt of blood sprinting down from a cut wound on his left bicep.
Swiftly, you walked up to him, your eyes trained only to the expanse of his body, scanning for other injuries he might have. You reached a hesitant hand out, slowly lifting the inside of his arm so you could take a closer look at it, tracing an absent-minded finger on the rim of the cut while you observed the rest of him. Jake's heartbeat had increased a lot by then, but you didn't need to know that.
God you were beautiful. When he caught a glimpse of you during his trial with the olo'eyktan and the tsahik, he was fatally hooked from the start. You had skin of the most prussian blue, small spots glittering vividly under the Hometree and almost-indigo stripes adorning your body. You had hair just as voluminous as the rest of the Na'vi, lustrous under the periwinkle sheen, swishing wildly along the movements of your lithe body. A part of it was put back in braids, a myriad of distinctive Omaticayan beads embellishing each strand, running down as it sang with every motion.
Clueless to his silent but blazing admiration, you nudged your head at him, urging him to follow you to sit down so you could treat his wounds.
He was like a scared cat, you decided. Ears snapping up with the smallest movements and eyes taking in the place like he'd never seen such a thing before. He probably thought if he stepped on the wrong thing he'd be absolutely obliterated. Much to his relief, you had left him to his own devices to prepare the salve, herbs and bandages to treat his wounds. To be honest, you really were quite curious about the new-comer. Though an outsider would always pose a threat to the clan, especially if they were a sky person, he seemed to be innocent enough. Clueless perhaps, but not naive. But despite that, you wanted to get to know him. To get a taste of the world outside Pandora.
"So uh.. what's your name?" He had asked, situated on the plush mattress woven with threads of terra-cotta, moss and ochre, acting in an (admittedly) cute and confused demeanor.
This was your first time seeing a sky person face to face since Grace Augustine opened her school, and what would be better than to have a little fun?
You stared at him strangely, tilting your head to the side with wide, innocent eyes; feigning confusion. It was quiet for a moment, Jake waiting for your answer and you observing what he would do under the weight of the atmosphere, trying your best to hold in the laugh at the perturbed looking sky person turned avatar in front of you.
Finally, after a long awkward silence, he muttered a small 'shit, sorry' under his breathe, now realizing that you probably weren't too familiar with English, nor did you understand his question. It was rather cute to see him stumble over his own actions. The sky walker with no fear in his heart—with the same heart that was just as kind.
"Tstxo.. nga tstxo?" He stuttered, his sable brows furrowing in deep concentration, the folds on his azure skin growing more visible the harder he tried. You could tell he had very minimal exposure to the Na'vi language unlike the other avatars you'd met, but he wasn't totally wrong. There was quite a lot of space for improvement here and there, but at least he tried and that was what mattered to you.
(Name.. you name?)
You couldn't help the small laugh that bubbled up in your throat, finally breaking your facade. He sounded very funny. To at least save him the humiliation, you covered your mouth with your hands, looking away just in time for him to snap his gaze up at your direction, wide-eyed like a doe as if your voice had put him in a daze.
And maybe it did. Jake thought it was the cutest thing he's ever heard. Though he'd never say it aloud, it would be something that echoes safely in the corners of his heart, softly swelling at the melody despite not knowing why you were laughing in the first place.
"Neytiri is right. You are like a baby." Your voice was just as soft as it was striking. Your English was good, save for the slivers of inflections in it and your accent ever present.
At that point Jake had never been more relieved in his entire life. "You speak English?"
He really did look like a child. The excitement showing in his eyes could rival even the sun, glowing even brighter as more of his canines showed with how wide he was smiling; he was really, really cute.
You eagerly nodded in reply, chuckling lightly to yourself as your held a wooden bowl in your hands, walking towards where he was sitting with his head tilted up with wonder.
"You are surprised?"
The avatar paused shortly when you finally sat in front of his face, holding his cut arm with the utmost care. "I mean, yeah,"
"Pretty surprised when there's only one Na'vi willing to talk to ya'." And Jake reveled deeply in the laugh you gave him. The laugh that he caused. He was pretty damn proud of himself.
"The children like you." You'd just finished cleaning the dirt and blood with a washcloth, the yellow-ish salve you were smoothing on his skin feeling strangely cooling on the inflamed cut. Ha. You could say that. The children only looked at him like a toy; a circus attraction. Though, he appreciated that they didn't whisper behind him or give him scathing looks. At least they were nice while they tugged on his tail and his ears.
You saw the resigned shake of his head as he looked down on the mattress, lips upturned in the smallest degree. With your nimble fingers, you gave him the slightest caress, flattening the cotton bandage over his bicep, hoping to offer him the merest hint of comfort. Even if you couldn't communicate with him all that well, you tried to show him that you accepted him as he was, to show that he did belong here in one way or another. If Eywa brought him here, then it didn't matter if he was a sky person in a Na'vi body, what mattered was his purpose, and the last thing you would do is to question the mother of life herself. "Tomorrow will be better than today. Have trust, JakeSully."
He doubted your words were true. His future wasn't looking so bright.. but there was something in your expression that made him pretty hopeful, like you actually believed in him. And maybe just so he didn't disappoint you he'd look forward another day in the Omaticaya clan, even if it meant being called a skzawng a hundred times.
"y/n."
"Sorry?" The dream walker looked up confused. Again. It seems like he's been stuck in this expression since he got out of that cryopod.
There it was again, the gentle smile he liked so much. "My name. You asked for it." You answered him, patient and calm in your demeanor.
He repeated your words, testing the sound in his voice. It was not too far off the pronunciation of your name, maybe a slight accent here and there but once he got it right it was like he was relishing the feel of your name rolling off his tongue, smiling when you nodded in satisfaction.
Much to your (and his) delight, the rest of the afternoon was spent talking to each other, opening up about your role in the clan, his role as an avatar driver and what's been happening in Omaticaya lately—both from yours and Jake's perspective. He had thanked you after you finished healing and cleaning his cuts for being so kind to him. Even when he was trying to find somebody to patch his ass up he was struggling to even find where the infirmary was located, most of the clan avoiding him like a plague, only getting an answer out of a slightly annoyed Na'vi female who pointed at your hut's direction.
Maybe you were enjoying this a little too much; you were too carried away to even think about the setting sun. So when it was time to join the rest of the clan for dinner after another successful hunt, there was still so much to talk about, so much that was left resting on the tip of your tongue, barely holding onto its last rope.
That was the start of your unlikely friendship with a sky person, of how you find peace and comfort within someone so different. It was something you'd never thought you'd be involved in ever since the tragedy that was Grace's school.
The days had gone by too fast, Pandora's sun and moon blending into burst of violet and orange too fast for your eyes to even admire. Your steadfast friendship with JakeSully became one of the things you would look up to when you woke up with the horizon, the guileless excitement in your heart returning after years of what felt like a missing piece inside of you. Now it's not that living in your beloved clan was numbing and repetitive, but it felt good to finally see something new, something foreign; it's what you've longed to experience for the past years you have lived your life.
Jake had been frequently visiting your snug hut whenever he wanted to talk to you. Sometimes, he actually came with wounds and bruises that needed to be treated but other times he lacked any of the mentioned above. You noticed it. He knows about it. But neither of you dared to comment on it in fear of ruining the serene bubble the two of you were in, so fragile as if one were to say a single word filled with the brutal reality of your two differently alike worlds it would pop like a balloon.
There was one time when it had only been a mere week of the avatar coming into your hut for his very apparent struggles in learning the ways of the Na'vi, when the two of you were yet to fully trust each other and were still touching the waters that guarded each other's hearts.
Jake had a nasty burn on his palm resulting from his excessive misuse of the wooden bow as well as from his attempts to become more agile while moving in the trees; a missed step causing him to slip off a large branch. He came in with a sheepish smile on his face like he was embarrassed to be here yet again, but you never made fun of him for it or used cruel words to tease him at his own expense. You were always there with open arms, though a frown would always make its way on your face when you saw how hurt he was.
"Something is wrong, JakeSully?" You asked just as you were done with wrapping his palms, relishing the quiet evening when you saw the far-away frown he had on his face, like he was contemplating something in his mind with every inch of his brain.
His response wan't as fast and quipped as it usually was and it worried you quiet a bit. Though, he tried to reassure you with a small, unconvincing smile on his face. "You could say that."
"I am a good listener, you know." There it was. Your little attempt to see into his hearts.
Jake seemed to be surprised that you would invite him to spill all of his turmoil onto you. No one has really been there for him to ask him that, and here you were, a Na'vi healer who he'd only known for less than a weeks time, willing to listen to him without judgment. "Just got some troubles of the minds, nothing your pretty head should worry about."
"Troubles of the mind' was a euphemism for the chaos going on in Jake's head.
One one hand, he'd been relaying information about Omaticaya and the Na'vi people to Selfridge and Quaritch, feeling like he accomplished something at last. But then.. then there was you. You and the rest of the clan. Pandora.
He had finally begun to find his place within Omaticaya, creating bonds and new friendships. It was something he came to find that he wouldn't trade for anything else in the world; the chance to experience what it was like to live with freedom, to feel the wind blowing on his face and the ground grazing his feet as he ran through the forests of Pandora. The chance to learn how to see, as Neytiri told him before. If he were to continue to tell shit about the Na'vi to his higher ups, there would be no doubt that the RDA would come in hot with guns blazing, ready to do whatever it took to destroy their homes and take what they want. Then he'd lose you. But if he stopped doing that then he'd probably be booted out of the avatar program in a second. He had no real skill to offer, not like his brother Tommy who was the actual scientists that trained exactly for this opportunity. If he was out then he'd never see Pandora or you again.
Either way it was a lose-lose situation for Jake.
It was silent for a while and you let him sit there with that look in his eyes again, the minuscule downturn on his eyebrows the only telling thing about what was really going on inside his head. You wanted to pry but it didn't feel like it was your place to. He was, to an extent, still an outsider and no matter the connection you felt with him in your heart, it was best to keep a distance before you did something regretful.
"I might not understand, but I can give you this." The least you could do was try to offer him even the smallest bit of comfort. You wouldn't overstep his boundaries and if he didn't want to speak to you about what was troubling his mind then you'd let him be. Even if it had changed nothing in him, at least you could show him there was still a light on the end of the tunnel, and that was enough for you to know that he understood you were there for him in one way or another.
With good intentions, you carefully placed a finger on the left of his chest, slowly flattening the palm of your hand when he made no move to remove it. "Listen here JakeSully." Slowly, you felt the muffled beating on his chest, the inconsistent up and down of his breaths beneath your hand. "Listen to your heart. What it tells you, what it beats for."
And when you looked up to meet his eyes it felt as if the world had shifted, a strike of lighting straight into your irises. It was electrifying. He was electrifying. When you first exchanged looks with each other it was nothing than a mere glance, the seed of your now blooming flower. But now it felt like he was seeing into your soul, like your heart was laid bare right in front of him.
"Do you hear her?" Nothing but a mere whisper from your lips in the silence of the night. Beneath you his heart beat wildly until it slowed down into a calm pace, becoming one with Pandora's own heart as his emotions stirred like the gleaming milky way.
"Hear who?" His response came delayed, too busy with staring into your brilliant ochre eyes.
"Eywa Jake, the great mother of all. She lives inside of us and all around us. Feel her inside your soul, feel her heart beat along yours; her whispers, her songs and her fates. What does she tell you, Jake?"
Stay. That's what he wanted to say—what he should have said. Eywa, his heart, his entire being is telling him to stay here, in Pandora, to become one with the Na'vi just like the rest of you. To stay for you, because all those times where his heart would thud painfully loud in his chest, when his thoughts would run whizzing past his head like a raging comet he would always find peace in you. Your beauty, your grace, your smile and your laughter. And they were right about Pandora. How this planet was so beautiful and luscious that you would easily fall in love with it. But also dangerous, that love turning into death very quickly. Of all the marvelous flora and fauna that kindled the gratifying glow at night, alive with an unfeigned heartbeat, there was you; like a magnet pulling him wherever you went despite his brain saying otherwise. You made him want to stay in a dance of death with Pandora.
It was new to you, the feeling of love. Perhaps at the beginning you simply defined it as fondness, that you appreciated his company and that was all. But the more you spent time with him, the more you really started looking at him. Started admiring the vivid light in his eyes when he would smile, his baritone laughter that made you close your eyes to savor the feeling once more, or his humor; the way he was able to make such a dire situation into something the two of you could laugh about, even as far as making it your own inside joke, nudging each other on the elbows during dinner or when you would drag him to watch over the Hallelujah mountains.
Maybe it was weird and unconventional even, for the Omaticaya people to see you be so.. in love with a demon. But you had gone long past those views, giving your trust and your heart away the moment JakeSully showed you how much he tries. How much he's willing to fall and fall all over again to be able to ride his pa'li, how battered and grazed he's willing to be just so he could properly use a hunting bow and fly his ikran. And most importantly, how much he tried to befriend you, to learn your likes and dislikes, your favorite fruits and your least, your hobbies and habits. Now that was something you could admire about a man. Despite how many times he fails, he still gets up with a smile on his face.
And that was perfect to you. He was perfect to you.
So when you were finally confronted with the prospect of the man you've come to love returning your feelings, you couldn't help but step back from the rose tinted glasses you wore over your eyes, suddenly realizing that maybe.. maybe the two of you were not meant to be like you thought. He was from a different world and while yes, he was to be accepted into the clan soon, you were compelled think he was fated for something greater. For someone greater.
Eywa brought him here for a reason, and you doubt it was just to adapt and become apart of the Omaticaya. Something was looming over the whole of Pandora and you couldn't help but worry about the fickle future.
You heard him before he even said hello, the familiar thumping of his footsteps like a melody that's been ingrained into your mind. When he was finally in your vicinity, you kept your back faced towards him, occupying yourself with cutting up some of the fresh healing herbs you had gathered the day before on your venture to the forest, your fingers moving a hundred miles per minute while your thoughts were filled with him and him only.
"If you want to complain about being called skzawng, I suggest you tell Neytiri yourself. She is always looking for a good fight, you know?" The words made it out of your lips so easily as if they were practiced a thousand times. But Jake made it easy for you to talk and joke around.
The avatar chuckled at your tease, now used to your jabs. He made his way right behind you, strutting in like he owned the place but still careful not to knock anything over again—he had enough experience with your scolding to last a lifetime. "Not here to bore you with my jabber, unfortunately."
Well if he wasn't here to talk his mind off about his teacher or the Na'vi culture then the only other option was that he got injured. Of course.
"You are hurt?" Your head moved like you'd gotten a whiplash, mind instantly racing with whatever in Eywa's name Jake could have gotten himself into. In a second you were met with his smiling face, already scanning his entire body for wounds, moving his arms and his braided queue out the way so you didn't miss a spot. Jake didn't hesitate to slither his tail on your leg, almost tripping you as you made your inspection. You only glared back playfully, baring your teeth while your eyes shined in visible mirth.
"Nah, I just wanted to talk to the resident pretty lady."
Your heart skipped a beat.
Maybe if he had said something like this before, you would have taken in with a lovely smile on your face, complimenting him—or rather jabbing at him—right back. That's what you always did. But not now.
Not now when he would soon become a man before Eywa, to be apart of Omaticaya as its own. To share happiness, grief, prayers, fiesta and celebrations together with the rest of the clan. Not now when he could finally choose a woman and you wanted so badly to be her. You don't think you've ever been so in love with someone else and it would break you; tear you apart piece by piece if you let your heart drive you into his arms, if you let yourself be hurt when he decided he didn't want you.
"You can not say things like that JakeSully." The bright grin you had on your face was quickly wiped off while you slowly retreated your form from him, eyes suddenly not able to look into his like you always did.
To say Jake was shocked would be an understatement. He had never seen you so downturned, so sad all of a sudden when you were smiling just a while ago. He was used to subtly complimenting you; it was like his second nature. He didn't understand why this time it had been so different. There was a flash of pain crossing your eyes before you turned away from him and oh did that make his heart wince. He never wanted to see that expression on your beautiful face again. Jake could either get slapped out of his goddamn body or be hugged as if it was the last time you'd ever touch somebody for what he was about to say. "Why not? Can't I speak my heart out to the woman I love?"
And he could have meant it in any way. Platonic, familial, but the way he said it so seriously, as if he's never been so sure about anything else made you think it was truly from the depth of his love-ridden heart, speaking out to you romantically as a man does to a woman.
Lately he had been so bold with his words. As if one sweet phrase coming out from his lips wouldn't set your entire being on fire, as if every time you felt his breathe on the shell of your ears while he talked about how good and kind you were to him didn't kill you inside every time. And you would not let him ruin you like that. Whether he was sincere with his intentions or not.. you took love very seriously.
And if.. what if he didn't want you anymore in a few couple decades after now? You didn't know a whole lot about human culture but you were aware that it was quite different from your own. Though you loved him entirely, you didn't want Jake to regret anything.
"You-"
"Hey," he gently put his hand on your shoulder and you shrugged it off, like his touch was fire spreading sparks all over your skin. No, you will not yield to his honeyed one. You'd be damned if you turned back to see him looking at you with those half-lidded eyes again, the way they were dripping with barely concealed affection, as if he had genuinely never seen something so entirely captivating in his existence.
"What's wrong?"
You shook your head at the floor, chuckling sadly like it was a joke. Like you were really hoping for it to be true. Everything was wrong. What felt like a dazzling path laid right in front of you fell right into ruins, along the rubble and dust your heart with it.
You only looked at him again when you'd gathered enough courage to face the bane of your existence and the object of your affection, trying to speak firmly while you ignored the way your words would waver. "When you choose a woman you will be mated to her forever. You understand? Forever." The last word was emphasized greatly as you pointed your finger at him.
"Yeah, and I want you." Jake didn't even hesitate to say those words. If you were stunned before, then you were absolutely taken aback by his tone. He just kept surprising you again and again with his certainty; the confidence in him unshakable.
He paced towards you slowly, trying to be calm so you wouldn't run away or god forbid hate him for what he was about to do. You drew back as much as you could until your back hit a wall, your breathes on edge and your eyes moving wildly. He stopped in his place for a moment, letting you clear your head and relieve your heart of its tumult. One and two quiet breathes later he brought his hands up to your face, brushing away the loose tresses of hair that fell beside your face, his knuckles caressing the apple of your cheek, just beneath your waterline where he could feel your eyelashes barely warming his skin. You fell weak against the will of your own love and you followed his movements, chasing the warmth of his palms while you leaned your head against it.
As though time had started ticking again Jake help your other arm, taking it in front if him and laying your hand over his heart; the same way you had done when you told him to open his eyes to Eywa. He encased your smaller hands beneath his own, the warmth spreading from the tip of your fingers to your head and toes, finally feeling at peace, like you were always meant to be together, embraced beneath the luster of a thousand stars.
"This right here? This is what I'm listening to right now. Just like you told me to. It's telling me to choose you, and I've never wanted anyone more."
And when you stared straight into his eyes to see no malice or lies, you surged forward to capture him in a searing kiss, slowly tuning out the sounds of Pandora while you savored the taste of him. When you leaned onto him in his moment of hesitation, he threaded his hands into your hair, tiling the back of your head up so he could feel all of you. You took his breathe away so many times, punching the air right out of his lungs and he would die all over again just to get a taste of you. Now, Jake was so sure you were the only one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Being with you made him feel like he had everything—more than he deserved. There was utterly no force in this entire world that could pull him away now that he had you.
He was warm and sweet, melancholic and full of joy at the same time. Kissing him felt like you were home and being in his arms felt like this was the life you were meant to live. The missing piece that you wanted to fill so desperately laid right on the palm of his fingers and the way he gave it away to you without a doubt in his mind, you were sure whatever came to the Na'vi, you'd be able to fight through it with Jake beside you. As your friend, confidant and your heart. As your mate.
And at that moment it didn't matter if he was a dream walker; not a true Na'vi just yet—not like you yet. It didn't matter that the two of you were star-crossed lovers; two people from completely different worlds, opposite sides of a mirror where you grew up with the feeling of flourishing grass beneath your feet and him the barren soil of a long-abandoned Earth. What matters is what you see and what he sees now. Freedom, beauty, and most importantly, love. There was no shame, hate or evil where you and Jake were, only that the world finally belonged to you both. You would walk the path Eywa wanted you to with a smile on your face, because you knew he was going to be with you no matter the distance, no matter if the world crumbled before your eyes. He was your beginning and your end, wherever you went your love transcending in forms that would live on for years in the stars.
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。˚ 💟 ꒱ ➛ I LOVE JAKE SUHLLAAAAY SO MUCH GUYS U ZONT UNDERSTAND like i had my second awakening watching avatar 2… CALL ME BABYGIRL PLS ME NEXT ME NEXT!
if you see mistakes and weird writing, no you didn't. my ass isn't proofreading this monster 💀
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mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
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aaaah omg!!! thank you for reading 😆 it was as much of an emotional experience for me as it was for you. 🩷
the ring was i think one of my favorite parts to write!
Love's Quiet Surrender
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To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
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"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
Tumblr media
WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Love's Quiet Surrender
Tumblr media
To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
Tumblr media
"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
Tumblr media
WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Love's Quiet Surrender
Tumblr media
To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
Tumblr media
"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
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WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
yay!!! so glad you enjoyed the story 💗 and thanks for the reblog!
Love's Quiet Surrender
Tumblr media
To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
Tumblr media
"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes come disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
Tumblr media
WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
2K notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Love's Quiet Surrender
Tumblr media
To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is. "You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
჌  pairing: bucky barnes x wife!reader
჌  warnings: maaybe steamy and also sad, small thunderbolts spoilers, writing errors soooorry
Tumblr media
"Buck?"
Your voice echoes in the warmly lit apartment. It's just some minutes past midnight, and in the air a gentle thrum permeates. A kind of stillness filled with exhaustion and comfort at the same time.
"Yes, baby?" Bucky answers almost immediately.
Even though he calls out from your bedroom, you can hear the fatigue beneath his tone. It's almost unnoticeable—he always tries to be put together whenever he talks to you and you hate it—but years of being by his side made you a whisperer or his tell tale signs. From the low lilt of his voice to the slight slur at the end of his sentence, you're no stranger to when Bucky needs to sleep.
Your husband had arrived home late today, presumably working on the whirlwind that was impeaching Valentina Allegra de Fontaine. He comes home disheveled these days, hair tousled with an aching frown on his lips—one you always try to kiss away. You can tell that this is all weighing down on him. The pressure, the bureaucracy, the slinking around your words to be sharp and polite at the same time. And the damn paperwork. It was endless. You don't think you've ever seen this much paper lying around your home and it was the 21st century.
Amongst all the papers and packets that your husband has very much not read yet, you he's been making talks to Valentina's assistant, Mel. He told you about what happened at the gala, how he attempted to convince her to switch sides. Did it go the way he expected? Mm, sort of?
It was endearing, in a way. Bucky always tried to be earnest, though sometimes it's difficult for him to spell out the right words—the right cues. You felt bad for the pout he sent your way as you giggled at his retelling. It took a few words and some kisses to convince him that he was not that awkward, and that you were sure Mel would give him something at least. The way Valentina was moving right now, there was bound to be a reason.
The man had since retired to your bedroom after some heavy coaxing. Bucky was adamant on staying out to help you clean up (he felt guilty for dropping chili sauce on your precious counters), but you didn't let him continue his sentence, knowing just how tired he was. You ushered him back, promising to join the man with an extra minute of head scratches if he followed your words. That seemed to do it, as he finally made his way to the bedroom with a small chuckle echoing.
While you were wiping down the counters, your eyes glanced towards Congressman Gary's dossier on de Fontaine. Less than the actual words on the paper, you focused on the mush of red staining the pristine white. You shook your head at the sight. Unfortunately, you don't think you've ever seen your husband finish a packet from top to bottom.
Not knowing what to do with it, you decide to just ask him. Though you think he’ll most likely tell you to throw it and every other coming packet down the trash, seeing how things are going now.
While trekking your way to him, you can hear him shuffling around in your bed, no doubt leaning onto it for a semblance of support.
When you finally arrive at your destination, the sight that greets you is nothing less than breathtaking—you say this to just about anything that Bucky does.
He's now dressed only in his white tank, evidence of the previous chili-dog accident thrown away into the laundry basket (to which he later promises to scrub it out, of course). He's got his legs spread and was, just as you had thought, leaning back on his arms against the bed. This angle lets you stare at the up and down motion of his breathing, the muscles flexing with tension. And God if this were any other night, you'd take him right then and there.
Once you're finally satisfied with your ogling—which you purposely timed in a way that lets your husband know it was much more than a simple glance—you finally speak.
"You left your packet on the counter. Didn't know if you wanted me to put it away 'cuz of the stain on it or…"
You trail off, giving him a sheepish smile as you leaned against the door with your arms crossed. Bucky's whole body just falls at the mention of the packet, his metal arm running a hand through his hair in quiet frustration. He looks done with it. It's like he's fighting the sleep right out of his eyes, and the dim bedside lamps don't help as it only accentuates a certain gauntness in his skin. Goddamn, he was trying to real hard here, but there was always an itch at the thought of only relying on the legal system. Valentina was a cunning and powerful woman. Bucky just couldn't see how a packet would overturn her entirely.
Without opening his eyes, his hand pats the top of his thigh, and you are compelled to follow that rhythm. You take quick but quiet steps to close the distance, finding yourself standing in between his legs while your hands fall on his broad shoulders. You're careful when you place your right hand down where his skin meets metal. Though he says it doesn't hurt as much as it used to, you always believe in treating his scars with the utmost kindness and care. He moves instantly, leaning forward to drag his hands down the curve of your waist before gripping the back of your thighs like he never wanted to let you go.
When he looks up at you, you see the smidge of defeat in his eyes, and the tired smile he sends your way just makes you want to cradle the man in your arms for eternity.
"Don't think this old man is cut out for this type'f thing, sweetheart." Bucky mutters almost inaudibly.
He tips his head back as he quietens, as if the weight above his head is too heavy to carry.
Despite the joke on his age, there's a small drop on your heart. It's different when Bucky says he's tired. It's because he's been doing life for a very long 110 years. You've always encouraged him to pursue everything he wanted, from the smallest thing like learning how to cook his favorite dishes to bigger ones like campaigning to be a congress member. So when he says that he doesn't feel fit to continue, a piece of your heart breaks because you understand how hard he tries. To move on, to become a better man.
You lift your hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, pushing forward lightly to let him rest on your stomach so it doesn't ache.
You shake your head while combing through his hair, pushing the loose strands behind his ear while gently replying, "Silly, everybody starts somewhere."
Bucky shakes his head against your waist, and you have to hold back a giggle at the sensation and the gesture. Sometimes your husband does things that are very childlike, and not only is it absolutely adorable, but it reminds you that he is just a human like everybody else.
"Feels like I haven't even stepped foot while everybody else is on the goddamn finishing line." He mumbles. Its nearly inaudible, but you can hear loud and clear the weight behind those words.
"That's not true." Your protest is as much convicted as it is true, and you make them known as you pull away from his grip, grabbing his shoulders to straddle him. Both your knees are bent beside his thighs, setting comfortably on the edge of the bed. It's an extremely familiar position—in many contexts. But it's the most intimate to you. Vulnerable. To be mere breathes away from his face, all of you and all of him meeting in the middle.
You know what he says isn't true because Bucky doesn't do things half-assed. He worked his way up on a very, very difficult campaign, rising above in a world that doesn't always make space for him. He has made it so far, from the Winter Soldier to Congressman Barnes. It hurts you that despite everything, he still has doubts about himself.
Even when he's hurting he holds you in his arms so gently, one arm propping behind your back while the metal one is stationed right on your neck, trailing down to your waist to join the other. Bucky pushes his face into your neck, molding it perfectly into the crook that was made for him. You run your fingers through his hair in response, wishing to relieve all the built up tension.
He breathes in your scent, nosing the skin like that mere contact could calm him down. And you feel the way he deflates beneath you, breath tensing—anticipating—as if he were scared of what he wanted to say next. The words he uttered then were so soft, yet so convicted at the same time. It sounded like he already knew it would happen. "If I went back out in the field.. would you be angry?"
Your fingers came to a pause, lips dropping into a small pout. The man slowly lifts his head up again to see why you've gone quiet and he can't help but give you a small kiss to soothe the upset.
Despite the slightly uncomfortable shift in your chest, you couldn't say you were surprised about his confession. Bucky had always been a man of action more than he was with words. He carries his promises in the way he moves. To repent, to love, to forgive. His silence spoke more than any word ever could. So it's not new to you that his sense of justice is rooted in physically fighting for it. Though you hated seeing him hurt, you loved it even more when he had that gratified smile and a look in his eyes that showed you he was proud of the man he became. You could never stop him from doing what he thought was right.
Toying with the chain of his dog tags you sighed, shaking your head in acceptance, "Worried maybe.. but never angry."
Bucky took your right hand off his chain and placed it on his cheek, softly urging you to look him in the eyes. He wanted to hear you say that right to his face. To look at the truth, the hurt and the apprehension. He wanted to understand you beyond the words that came out of your mouth.
"You mean that, sweetheart?" He kissed your palm like it was glass, savoring every line and crease as if it was heaven beneath his lips. He stopped particularly longer when he met your ring finger, where a golden band had sat comfortably for years.
Bucky was ready to see the light dim in you—he knew you didn't enjoy seeing him go back out there after everything he went through. He was ready to use everything in him to spark it again, to save whatever trust you had left in you.
But he was utterly surprised to see the pure acceptance in your eyes. That kind of willingness to stay beside him along the ride, no matter the bumps and distance in between. You looked at him like you were ready to weather the storms and carry the weight of the world with him—if not for him.
Because this is what love is. Love gives and lets go without seeking recognition, without seeking for something in return. You love because you have the capability to—to make space and celebrate another flourishing in your presence.
Being with Bucky was never about what you could get, but what you could offer him.
And so in love's quiet surrender you learn to accept without condition. To love without judgement, without the need to change him. Not just whenever he makes you laugh or smile, but all of his darkness. His past, his anger, his sadness. You do not desire for him to become someone else because you understand that he is enough as he is.
"You can be anything you want and I'd still be here to love you." It was your promise, sealed with a gentle kiss on his lips.
And suddenly it wasn't just him against the world. Wasn't just the darkness creeping into his life, never with mercy, never with kindness. There was you at the end of the tunnel, holding out your hand for him. A chance at salvation.
You could be that for him. A saving grace, a friend, a lover. You'd be anything for him if it meant you could see that rare sight of his smile again.
There is no future without him in it.
He tightens his grip around your waist, arms snaking their way beneath your pajamas to touch the skin. Not the bruising, desperate kind, but a touch that grounds him in the moment. That allows him to feel every single emotion following your confession. You arch against him lightly, laying your palm against his clothed chest when the cool metal of both his arm and the ring on the right meet your skin. But it only makes you smile into his lips, remembering that small yet incredibly meaningful detail.
He wears his wedding ring on the right instead of the left.
Bucky told you that it was because he wanted to always feel the weight on his skin. Not the phantom one on his left, but that real, wrapping sensation, so that he'd never forget one of the happiest moments of his life. So he’d never forget that there was someone waiting for him.
Bucky continues to kiss you with leisure, humming in satisfaction when your hands run up and down from the base of his neck to the top of his head. He pushed your body impossibly close, wanting to feel each and every part of you.
When he is finally satisfied with your loving, he pulls away to face you and you see that mischievous look return to his eyes. He leans in yet again, trailing little pecks that trace your jawline before asking,
"Even if I was a paperboy?"
Now this brings an unexpected laugh out of you.
You know for a fact that Bucky actually used to be paperboy back in the 30s. It's a story that you hold safe in your heart, a glimpse of a reality lost to time. You remember the first time he told you about it back before the two of you got married and the pure elation you felt. Although you knew paperboys did exist, it never settled in your head that they were real real. More than that, you never pictured that your very own husband was one back in his days.
With your head thrown back in glee, Bucky couldn't take his eyes off of you. He loved your smile, even more when he was the reason for it. His clear blue eyes took in the very image of you, everything from the hearty breathes you were releasing, the crease of your lips to the way your throat bobbed. He would trade the world for the sound of your laughter and the stars for that glimmer in your eyes.
"Oh I can just imagine little Bucky riding around the neighborhood in his overalls and newsboy cap. I bet you made eeeveryone fall for how cute you were."
It was meant to be a tease on your husband's charming nature, but deep down you genuinely believed that to be true. And you were proven right when he shrugged in response, that annoyingly handsome smug smile settling deeply on his face.
"How'd you think I sold out everytime, doll?"
It's times like these where you see the light come back into his eyes. The nonchalance, the proud puff in his chest. He has such a beautiful smile. The most beautiful.
The surge of love you felt propelled you to wrap your arms around his head, pushing his face to rest on your plush chest. "You were a charmer weren't you?"
"Born and raised, ma'am." He mumbled against the soft fabric of your top. His hand drifted down to the bottom of your ass, caressing in a silent promise for the coming night.
You chased after it, placing your hand on top of his and then dragging your fingers up lazily, tracing the vein on his bicep. It teetered on his shoulder now, where you could feel him shudder and then flex beneath. With this gesture you felt the utter pride and masculinity showing. "You're not even denying it!" You exclaim as his lips move away from that comfortable spot on your chest to press a thousand pecks on your neck and then cheek. His beard—the one that you begged for him not to shave off—ticked you pleasantly. Once he realizes this fact though, he cheekily shakes his head, and you squirmed to get away only for him to snake a hand behind your head to softly guide you back to his lips.
You sighed against him, closing your eyes to savor the feeling. "The man of my dreams."
"You dreaming of me?" It took him a while to answer you, too occupied with tasting your sweetness. He whispered the tease right beside your ears, his lips mapping the shell as he softly nipped your earlobe.
"Every night Bucky."
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WOWWWW thunderbolts Bucky changed my life you guys (hello prince hair). I initially wanted to write a playful little moment with him but got a tiiiny bit emotional 😅
ALSO ITS CANON TO MEEE that Bucky used to be a paperboy. I literally couldn't stop laughing at the thought
masterlist
dividers by @enchanthings-a
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mooncleaver ¡ 1 year ago
Text
I WANT HIM BACK TOO gege there's 3 chaps left please 😭 and i am super happy that you enjoyed reading!! thanks for reblogging cutie 😘
Love Is The Reason
჌ pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader, familial fushiguro megumi x fem!reader
჌ warnings: MAJOR JJK268 SPOILERS. pls don't read if you don't wanna know!! slightly cannon divergent
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What the hell.
His ears didn't stop ringing as he brought his body up from its position on the surprisingly soft surface, feeling every ache known to man throbbing all over. Megumi felt the cosmic numbness ebbing away like a flash, and suddenly, he could discern the warm cotton wrapped around his upper body along with the linen sheets that lay beneath him. The three—out of many—scars on his face pulled his skin tautly, so close to his eyes where that devil's face wore his for however long this limbo period was. It hurt to open his eyes. Well, it hurt to do anything, but he's thankful that he can see the world through his own view.
Megumi's ears perk up to the sound of poorly attempted hushed arguments. The sound was so familiar that for once in his life, he felt relieved to hear it. To feel that irritation ticking in his chest, the mindless crease that's fully starting to make itself known on his forehead, and that growing scowl—he could truly cry at the return of bodily autonomy.
Nobara was trying to fit herself inside a present-shaped cardboard box while Yuji stood next to the thing, pushing down the lid on top of her head, which ruffled the strands like crazy. Of course, the girl would not stand for this butchering of her beauty. She spent a lot of time trying to look presentable, not that this pink-haired fool would understand.
Megumi is hit with a deep sense of dejavu as he sits up against the headboard, looking back at the memory of Gojo doing the same exact surprise tactic to announce that Yuji was, in fact, not dead after his literal heart got ripped out of his chest. The boy can feel a smile forming on his lips, and he makes no move to try and stop it.
"What are you two doing?"
He sees Yuji and Nobara freeze in their spots, both eyes widening comically. A second passes before the two let go of whatever it was they were contending about, rushing forward to stick their faces into Megumi's. The former vessel looks—well, he looks like he's had better days. He's thankfully clean of all the blood oozing out of his skin when he fought Sukuna for the last time, his usual uniform with the red hoodie looking incredibly pristine, absent of any rips or blood. Still, some are sticking onto his face, notably a darker shade cutting down across his eyebrows as the dried blood clings onto his wounds. Nobara looks happier. God, he thought she died. He was ready to mourn her with all the losses he'd suffered, but for once, Megumi was glad to hear her voice. He welcomes it. She's wearing a black eyepatch on top of the eye that she lost fighting Mahito, and her uniform is equally as clean as Yuji's—Megumi can tell that she's relieved by that fact.
Finally, they're back together again. The trio of first years with lost dreams who've gone through horrible, terrible things now have found hope again—hope that never died within each other.
"Fushiguro!!" The two yell in unison, going in to hug him despite knowing he didn't usually like that kind of thing. But to their honest surprise, Megumi returned the gesture, fully and truly, closing his eyes and letting out a breath. Yuuji and Nobara didn't hesitate to tighten their arms around the spiky-haired boy, be damned the near-death exhaustion clinging to their bones. They may be battered and bruised, but they survived.
After a quiet moment, the momentum was back again as Nobara looked at the two boys with a disgruntled expression, her exaggerated self on display at the lack of reaction to her return. "You know, the class's Madonna, who everyone thought was dead, by the way, turned out to be alive?! You two should be either wetting yourself or crying with joy!"
Megumi didn't even bat an eye, unlike Yuji, who was scrambling out of his mind, replying to her in his usual stoic and flat voice. "I see. My bad."
"So, the bastard is dead then." The Fushiguro didn't phrase that like a question, more so stating a fact. The fact that he was here in his own body, alive and breathing, undoubtedly meant that the curse was dead. It was still surreal to utter, knowing that this was the one thing they'd all been fighting for since forever. Maybe now, everyone who was gone didn't die in vain.
Nobara sounded like she was still in disbelief, shaking her head slightly while she grinned and exclaimed, "Ha! Yeah! Itadori beasted that guy like it was a piece of cake!"
"Eh.. well, it was pretty tough, I'm not gonna lie. I cried a little when resonance was hit." Yuji himself could only scratch the back of his neck at the rare praise, his eyes crinkling into thin lines as he admitted his own emotions. It was kind of daunting to be the one who killed Sukuna with the fact that he used to be the curse's vessel. But out of everything, making that final blow was something he didn't once hesitate on. Yuji was going to finish all this madness. It all started with him and ended with him—the way it should be.
Megumi didn't sound too surprised at the boy's admission, only giving him a look in response. "I know. I saw everything happening inside Sukuna."
"Ugh... don't even remind me now. Well, at least you two have the shared experience of being a vessel now." Well, no matter how sour the fact was, it was true.
Breaking his thoughts, Yuji suddenly lit up as he shifted through his pants pockets, haphazardly pulling out the crumpled pieces of paper in his hand. "Oh, wait, guys. I have something for you two. It's from Gojo-sensei. Gojo-san, too, I think."
The pink-haired boy grew incredibly sullen at the mention of both his teachers. He'd miss calling out to the two Gojo's, mixing the couple up despite your previous urgings to the students of simply calling you by your first name. Of course, your husband would not absolutely have that, sneakily going behind your back and basically forcing his students to call you Gojo, too. If he couldn't get the second years to follow, he'd make his own kids do it. The man would not pass on the chance of hearing people call you by your shared last name.
"A letter.." Megumi looked shocked at the fact. His sensei (and self-proclaimed dad who stepped up) never did this kind of thing—seriously, that is.
Growing up with Gojo and his wife, Megumi knew the white-haired sorcerers never strayed away from being lighthearted and childlike. Despite witnessing the lanky heir change from the bratty 18-year-old who approached him as a child in the streets into the mature, married man he was the last time, it just wasn't in his nature to be doing some sentimental things like this. That was more like something you'd do. From the daily lunch notes, deep-meaning gifts (that he still kept to this day), and the affectionate texts you'd always send, he would wager that you might've been the one to drag your husband to write the letters. But, knowing that Gojo probably had a feeling that he wouldn't make it out of the fight, it's not impossible that this truly came from him.
Nobara chuckled at his tone of voice, silently agreeing with his disbelief. Gojo was definitely not the type to do this.. it unsettled her.
"I feel you.. this is totally not like him. It's slightly gross to even imagine him writing letters.."
Though, after reading, she crushed the piece of paper in her hand, pursing her lips. Yuji noticed this, facing her to ask what it said. With slight hesitation, Nobara revealed that it contained information about her mother's whereabouts. To be honest, she wasn't sure how to feel. Some part of her still longed to feel her love.
"Oh, did you even want to know in the first place?"
She shook her head as she looked down, leaving no room for the topic to be continued. "Not at all."
Suddenly, they heard the very, very rare sound of Megumi's laughter ringing out from the bed. Gojo would've bawled knowing he made his son laugh. It took a moment for them to snap out of the shock, seeing the fresh face of their friend's smile. He looked like a brand new person—content, young and carefree. It was refreshing.
Megumi hasn't felt this happy in a long while. He expected that the message wouldn't be some deep, meaningful thing, but out of everything, it was a joke about how he killed his biological dad. He wasn't sad, surprisingly. Megumi never really knew the man that left him and his sister to fend for themselves, and the memories he had of him weren't great. At least he found some closure. The boy shook his head, reading the familiar and large handwriting of his father figure. You'd think that it'd be messy, but as the former heir of the Gojo clan, Satoru was a trained guy in the art of handwriting. He wouldn't be caught dead with scribbles.
Unfortunately your father isn't around anymore!! Cuz I killed him!! Sowwy!! :P
Short, simple, and kind of foolish.
He bit back a grin. Even in death, the man couldn't take anything seriously.
Beneath it was a softer and more serious note. From you, of course. Megumi did not doubt that you wrote this to make up for your husband's short message, writing a heartfelt one that he could sense even before reading. The two of you must've known that this was not a fight you would come out of. And as much as that hurt him, Megumi was glad that he was in your last thoughts. It meant a lot to know that you and Gojo believed he, Nobara, and Yuji would live through everything.
Firstly, don't take this idiot too seriously. If you're reading this megs, we're probably gone, but hey, you're okay! Live your life fully okay? Don't forget that you're still a kid in the end. We're always looking out for you, sweetheart. ♡
There was a chibi doodle in the bottom and a sweet greeting that said,
— Love you beyond infinity, mom & dad
Megumi could tell that this was Gojo's handwriting. It was meant as a joke (the boy didn't call Satoru dad very often, despite calling you mom. It was kinda cringe.) but he accepted that sincerely. You two were his parents, biological or not. He loves you so much.
And he'd promise that for you. For Satoru, too, to be honest. To live life fully. Ever since he knew what living meant, he never intended to live a proper life. The absence of his biological father and the death of his mother left an untreated wound in his heart, altering his mind in a way that left him isolated—a recluse from the world, almost. The only thing that used to keep him going was his sister, Tsumiki. Now she is really gone. But then, everything shifted when he first saw Gojo Satoru.
It was a big change to have people to look up to. To have a mother. Megumi called you mom way before he even considered Satoru as his father figure, and it was one of the most precious things in life. You never took that for granted, always spoiling him and treating him like he came from your own womb. You knew you'd never take the place of his biological mother, but you wanted to be someone the boy could rely on in such a cruel world. It was a bit strange when Satoru first brought up the idea of raising the Fushiguro boy. You were both still 18, barely even adults with so much pressure and responsibilities. But you knew, from the moment you saw this poor boy getting dragged home by your boyfriend, that you'd love him like no other.
You and Satoru gave him and Tsumiki a home. An unlikely one, but a home nonetheless. You gave him a love like no other, an unconditional, wholehearted, and absolute kind of love, even when the two of you were struggling. It was a type that couldn't be described by words and only felt. That, along with the friendship and true family he found within Nobara and Yuji, made him realize that even if he didn't live his life for himself, there were others in the world. Other people, whether that'd be a mother, a father, a sister, or a brother could give everything meaning. A reason to keep going.
At first, he only lived for Tsumiki. To use everything he had to save her. But then he found himself living for you, for Satoru, for Nobara and Yuji. Once more, he would try again. This wasn't a chance he'd take for granted.
Reading the note made Megumi feel a kind of warmth he hadn't felt in a long time. The kind that he last felt when you hugged him tightly and kissed his forehead before everything in Shibuya happened. That was probably the last time he saw you happy and alive. The world was dull when you died. A victim of that son of a bitch curse Mahito. That was a loss like no other, so incredibly painful and numbing.
At least you died in an honorable way.
After that, he didn't know how to function. Tsumiki, Nobara, and now you. The boy felt half of his soul chip away.
Your husband was even worse. Inconsolable. Watching his wife die in front of his eyes before getting sealed the second after. When the man came out of the prison realm, anyone could tell he wasn't the same. There was no chance the old Gojo would ever return. And sure, he was still lighthearted, but Megumi could tell there was a weight in his gait—the heavy burden of the loss of his darling wife dragging down every word that came out of his mouth. He saw the sadness, longing, anger, and pure vengeance in his eyes. It never did go away. Not even when Sukuna butchered the man in half. At least now, the two of you were together in the afterlife. Megumi truly hoped that. He didn't believe much in that kind of stuff, but for his mother and his father, he prayed for a final peace to be granted.
That hope—along with the one amongst the living pushed Megumi to go on. To not just survive but to really live. Even beyond that, there were others too. His cousin, Maki, who was thankfully alive, and even Toge and Panda.
This was love. That unanswered purpose of life. It's to give love and find love in others. Love is why people do crazy things: to sacrifice the world, to sacrifice themselves. That's why he kept living even when his own dad disappeared or why he kept fighting to keep his sister alive. Love is why, despite the grief, Satoru still fought for you, for your memory, and for your efforts. Love is the reason he's alive.
And if anything, Megumi learned that when you have people in your life, you'd do anything to keep them in it. That's what you and Satoru taught him. Waking up in his own body again and greeted by the sight of his best friends—that was one of the biggest blessings he has ever received.
For his family, he would do anything.
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i'm fucking crying. like actually. 3 chapters to go until this manga ends and i still can't fathom everything happening bruv
btw, this is what i imagine the letter would look like haha. half cannonical cuz it's the panel translation!! excuse my handwriting um
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also sorry this isn't really proofread lol, i really wanted to post!!
dividers @cafekitsune @i-mmaculatus
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mooncleaver ¡ 1 year ago
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Love Is The Reason
჌ pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader, familial fushiguro megumi x fem!reader
჌ warnings: MAJOR JJK268 SPOILERS. pls don't read if you don't wanna know!! slightly cannon divergent
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What the hell.
His ears didn't stop ringing as he brought his body up from its position on the surprisingly soft surface, feeling every ache known to man throbbing all over. Megumi felt the cosmic numbness ebbing away like a flash, and suddenly, he could discern the warm cotton wrapped around his upper body along with the linen sheets that lay beneath him. The three—out of many—scars on his face pulled his skin tautly, so close to his eyes where that devil's face wore his for however long this limbo period was. It hurt to open his eyes. Well, it hurt to do anything, but he's thankful that he can see the world through his own view.
Megumi's ears perk up to the sound of poorly attempted hushed arguments. The sound was so familiar that for once in his life, he felt relieved to hear it. To feel that irritation ticking in his chest, the mindless crease that's fully starting to make itself known on his forehead, and that growing scowl—he could truly cry at the return of bodily autonomy.
Nobara was trying to fit herself inside a present-shaped cardboard box while Yuji stood next to the thing, pushing down the lid on top of her head, which ruffled the strands like crazy. Of course, the girl would not stand for this butchering of her beauty. She spent a lot of time trying to look presentable, not that this pink-haired fool would understand.
Megumi is hit with a deep sense of dejavu as he sits up against the headboard, looking back at the memory of Gojo doing the same exact surprise tactic to announce that Yuji was, in fact, not dead after his literal heart got ripped out of his chest. The boy can feel a smile forming on his lips, and he makes no move to try and stop it.
"What are you two doing?"
He sees Yuji and Nobara freeze in their spots, both eyes widening comically. A second passes before the two let go of whatever it was they were contending about, rushing forward to stick their faces into Megumi's. The former vessel looks—well, he looks like he's had better days. He's thankfully clean of all the blood oozing out of his skin when he fought Sukuna for the last time, his usual uniform with the red hoodie looking incredibly pristine, absent of any rips or blood. Still, some are sticking onto his face, notably a darker shade cutting down across his eyebrows as the dried blood clings onto his wounds. Nobara looks happier. God, he thought she died. He was ready to mourn her with all the losses he'd suffered, but for once, Megumi was glad to hear her voice. He welcomes it. She's wearing a black eyepatch on top of the eye that she lost fighting Mahito, and her uniform is equally as clean as Yuji's—Megumi can tell that she's relieved by that fact.
Finally, they're back together again. The trio of first years with lost dreams who've gone through horrible, terrible things now have found hope again—hope that never died within each other.
"Fushiguro!!" The two yell in unison, going in to hug him despite knowing he didn't usually like that kind of thing. But to their honest surprise, Megumi returned the gesture, fully and truly, closing his eyes and letting out a breath. Yuuji and Nobara didn't hesitate to tighten their arms around the spiky-haired boy, be damned the near-death exhaustion clinging to their bones. They may be battered and bruised, but they survived.
After a quiet moment, the momentum was back again as Nobara looked at the two boys with a disgruntled expression, her exaggerated self on display at the lack of reaction to her return. "You know, the class's Madonna, who everyone thought was dead, by the way, turned out to be alive?! You two should be either wetting yourself or crying with joy!"
Megumi didn't even bat an eye, unlike Yuji, who was scrambling out of his mind, replying to her in his usual stoic and flat voice. "I see. My bad."
"So, the bastard is dead then." The Fushiguro didn't phrase that like a question, more so stating a fact. The fact that he was here in his own body, alive and breathing, undoubtedly meant that the curse was dead. It was still surreal to utter, knowing that this was the one thing they'd all been fighting for since forever. Maybe now, everyone who was gone didn't die in vain.
Nobara sounded like she was still in disbelief, shaking her head slightly while she grinned and exclaimed, "Ha! Yeah! Itadori beasted that guy like it was a piece of cake!"
"Eh.. well, it was pretty tough, I'm not gonna lie. I cried a little when resonance was hit." Yuji himself could only scratch the back of his neck at the rare praise, his eyes crinkling into thin lines as he admitted his own emotions. It was kind of daunting to be the one who killed Sukuna with the fact that he used to be the curse's vessel. But out of everything, making that final blow was something he didn't once hesitate on. Yuji was going to finish all this madness. It all started with him and ended with him—the way it should be.
Megumi didn't sound too surprised at the boy's admission, only giving him a look in response. "I know. I saw everything happening inside Sukuna."
"Ugh... don't even remind me now. Well, at least you two have the shared experience of being a vessel now." Well, no matter how sour the fact was, it was true.
Breaking his thoughts, Yuji suddenly lit up as he shifted through his pants pockets, haphazardly pulling out the crumpled pieces of paper in his hand. "Oh, wait, guys. I have something for you two. It's from Gojo-sensei. Gojo-san, too, I think."
The pink-haired boy grew incredibly sullen at the mention of both his teachers. He'd miss calling out to the two Gojo's, mixing the couple up despite your previous urgings to the students of simply calling you by your first name. Of course, your husband would not absolutely have that, sneakily going behind your back and basically forcing his students to call you Gojo, too. If he couldn't get the second years to follow, he'd make his own kids do it. The man would not pass on the chance of hearing people call you by your shared last name.
"A letter.." Megumi looked shocked at the fact. His sensei (and self-proclaimed dad who stepped up) never did this kind of thing—seriously, that is.
Growing up with Gojo and his wife, Megumi knew the white-haired sorcerers never strayed away from being lighthearted and childlike. Despite witnessing the lanky heir change from the bratty 18-year-old who approached him as a child in the streets into the mature, married man he was the last time, it just wasn't in his nature to be doing some sentimental things like this. That was more like something you'd do. From the daily lunch notes, deep-meaning gifts (that he still kept to this day), and the affectionate texts you'd always send, he would wager that you might've been the one to drag your husband to write the letters. But, knowing that Gojo probably had a feeling that he wouldn't make it out of the fight, it's not impossible that this truly came from him.
Nobara chuckled at his tone of voice, silently agreeing with his disbelief. Gojo was definitely not the type to do this.. it unsettled her.
"I feel you.. this is totally not like him. It's slightly gross to even imagine him writing letters.."
Though, after reading, she crushed the piece of paper in her hand, pursing her lips. Yuji noticed this, facing her to ask what it said. With slight hesitation, Nobara revealed that it contained information about her mother's whereabouts. To be honest, she wasn't sure how to feel. Some part of her still longed to feel her love.
"Oh, did you even want to know in the first place?"
She shook her head as she looked down, leaving no room for the topic to be continued. "Not at all."
Suddenly, they heard the very, very rare sound of Megumi's laughter ringing out from the bed. Gojo would've bawled knowing he made his son laugh. It took a moment for them to snap out of the shock, seeing the fresh face of their friend's smile. He looked like a brand new person—content, young and carefree. It was refreshing.
Megumi hasn't felt this happy in a long while. He expected that the message wouldn't be some deep, meaningful thing, but out of everything, it was a joke about how he killed his biological dad. He wasn't sad, surprisingly. Megumi never really knew the man that left him and his sister to fend for themselves, and the memories he had of him weren't great. At least he found some closure. The boy shook his head, reading the familiar and large handwriting of his father figure. You'd think that it'd be messy, but as the former heir of the Gojo clan, Satoru was a trained guy in the art of handwriting. He wouldn't be caught dead with scribbles.
Unfortunately your father isn't around anymore!! Cuz I killed him!! Sowwy!! :P
Short, simple, and kind of foolish.
He bit back a grin. Even in death, the man couldn't take anything seriously.
Beneath it was a softer and more serious note. From you, of course. Megumi did not doubt that you wrote this to make up for your husband's short message, writing a heartfelt one that he could sense even before reading. The two of you must've known that this was not a fight you would come out of. And as much as that hurt him, Megumi was glad that he was in your last thoughts. It meant a lot to know that you and Gojo believed he, Nobara, and Yuji would live through everything.
Firstly, don't take this idiot too seriously. If you're reading this megs, we're probably gone, but hey, you're okay! Live your life fully okay? Don't forget that you're still a kid in the end. We're always looking out for you, sweetheart. ♡
There was a chibi doodle in the bottom and a sweet greeting that said,
— Love you beyond infinity, mom & dad
Megumi could tell that this was Gojo's handwriting. It was meant as a joke (the boy didn't call Satoru dad very often, despite calling you mom. It was kinda cringe.) but he accepted that sincerely. You two were his parents, biological or not. He loves you so much.
And he'd promise that for you. For Satoru, too, to be honest. To live life fully. Ever since he knew what living meant, he never intended to live a proper life. The absence of his biological father and the death of his mother left an untreated wound in his heart, altering his mind in a way that left him isolated—a recluse from the world, almost. The only thing that used to keep him going was his sister, Tsumiki. Now she is really gone. But then, everything shifted when he first saw Gojo Satoru.
It was a big change to have people to look up to. To have a mother. Megumi called you mom way before he even considered Satoru as his father figure, and it was one of the most precious things in life. You never took that for granted, always spoiling him and treating him like he came from your own womb. You knew you'd never take the place of his biological mother, but you wanted to be someone the boy could rely on in such a cruel world. It was a bit strange when Satoru first brought up the idea of raising the Fushiguro boy. You were both still 18, barely even adults with so much pressure and responsibilities. But you knew, from the moment you saw this poor boy getting dragged home by your boyfriend, that you'd love him like no other.
You and Satoru gave him and Tsumiki a home. An unlikely one, but a home nonetheless. You gave him a love like no other, an unconditional, wholehearted, and absolute kind of love, even when the two of you were struggling. It was a type that couldn't be described by words and only felt. That, along with the friendship and true family he found within Nobara and Yuji, made him realize that even if he didn't live his life for himself, there were others in the world. Other people, whether that'd be a mother, a father, a sister, or a brother could give everything meaning. A reason to keep going.
At first, he only lived for Tsumiki. To use everything he had to save her. But then he found himself living for you, for Satoru, for Nobara and Yuji. Once more, he would try again. This wasn't a chance he'd take for granted.
Reading the note made Megumi feel a kind of warmth he hadn't felt in a long time. The kind that he last felt when you hugged him tightly and kissed his forehead before everything in Shibuya happened. That was probably the last time he saw you happy and alive. The world was dull when you died. A victim of that son of a bitch curse Mahito. That was a loss like no other, so incredibly painful and numbing.
At least you died in an honorable way.
After that, he didn't know how to function. Tsumiki, Nobara, and now you. The boy felt half of his soul chip away.
Your husband was even worse. Inconsolable. Watching his wife die in front of his eyes before getting sealed the second after. When the man came out of the prison realm, anyone could tell he wasn't the same. There was no chance the old Gojo would ever return. And sure, he was still lighthearted, but Megumi could tell there was a weight in his gait—the heavy burden of the loss of his darling wife dragging down every word that came out of his mouth. He saw the sadness, longing, anger, and pure vengeance in his eyes. It never did go away. Not even when Sukuna butchered the man in half. At least now, the two of you were together in the afterlife. Megumi truly hoped that. He didn't believe much in that kind of stuff, but for his mother and his father, he prayed for a final peace to be granted.
That hope—along with the one amongst the living pushed Megumi to go on. To not just survive but to really live. Even beyond that, there were others too. His cousin, Maki, who was thankfully alive, and even Toge and Panda.
This was love. That unanswered purpose of life. It's to give love and find love in others. Love is why people do crazy things: to sacrifice the world, to sacrifice themselves. That's why he kept living even when his own dad disappeared or why he kept fighting to keep his sister alive. Love is why, despite the grief, Satoru still fought for you, for your memory, and for your efforts. Love is the reason he's alive.
And if anything, Megumi learned that when you have people in your life, you'd do anything to keep them in it. That's what you and Satoru taught him. Waking up in his own body again and greeted by the sight of his best friends—that was one of the biggest blessings he has ever received.
For his family, he would do anything.
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i'm fucking crying. like actually. 3 chapters to go until this manga ends and i still can't fathom everything happening bruv
btw, this is what i imagine the letter would look like haha. half cannonical cuz it's the panel translation!! excuse my handwriting um
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also sorry this isn't really proofread lol, i really wanted to post!!
dividers @cafekitsune @i-mmaculatus
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mooncleaver ¡ 1 year ago
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IM DEAD IM DEAAAAAD WTH
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mooncleaver ¡ 1 year ago
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Love Is The Reason
჌ pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader, familial fushiguro megumi x fem!reader
჌ warnings: MAJOR JJK268 SPOILERS. pls don't read if you don't wanna know!! slightly cannon divergent
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What the hell.
His ears didn't stop ringing as he brought his body up from its position on the surprisingly soft surface, feeling every ache known to man throbbing all over. Megumi felt the cosmic numbness ebbing away like a flash, and suddenly, he could discern the warm cotton wrapped around his upper body along with the linen sheets that lay beneath him. The three—out of many—scars on his face pulled his skin tautly, so close to his eyes where that devil's face wore his for however long this limbo period was. It hurt to open his eyes. Well, it hurt to do anything, but he's thankful that he can see the world through his own view.
Megumi's ears perk up to the sound of poorly attempted hushed arguments. The sound was so familiar that for once in his life, he was relieved to hear it. To feel that irritation ticking in his chest, the mindless crease that's fully starting to make itself known on his forehead and that growing scowl—he could truly cry at the return of bodily autonomy.
Nobara was trying to fit herself inside a present-shaped cardboard box while Yuji stood next to the thing, pushing down the lid on top of her head, which ruffled the strands like crazy. Of course, the girl would not stand for this butchering of her beauty. She spent a lot of time trying to look presentable. Not that this pink-haired fool would understand.
Megumi is hit with a deep sense of dejavu as he sits up against the headboard, looking back at the memory of Gojo doing the same exact surprise tactic to announce that Yuji was, in fact, not dead after his literal heart got ripped out of his chest. The boy can feel a smile forming on his lips, and he makes no move to try and stop it.
"What are you two doing?"
He sees Yuji and Nobara freeze in their spots, both eyes widening comically. A second passes before the two let go of whatever it was they were contending about, rushing forward to stick their faces into Megumi's. The former vessel looks—well, he looks like he's had better days. He's thankfully clean of all the blood oozing out of his skin when he fought Sukuna for the last time, his usual uniform with the red hoodie looking incredibly pristine, absent of any rips or blood. Still, some are sticking onto his face, notably a darker shade cutting down across his eyebrows as the dried blood clings onto his wounds. Nobara looks happier. God, he thought she died. He was ready to mourn her with all the losses he'd suffered, but for once, Megumi was glad to hear her voice. He welcomes it. She's wearing a black eyepatch on top of the eye that she lost fighting Mahito, and her uniform is equally as clean as Yuji's—Megumi can tell that she's relieved by that fact.
Finally, they're back together again. The trio of first years with lost dreams who've gone through horrible, terrible things now have found hope again—hope that never died within each other.
"Fushiguro!!" The two yell in unison, going in to hug him despite knowing he didn't usually like that kind of thing. But to their honest surprise, Megumi returned the gesture, fully and truly, closing his eyes and letting out a breath. Yuuji and Nobara didn't hesitate to tighten their arms around the spiky-haired boy, be damned the near-death exhaustion clinging to their bones. They may be battered and bruised, but they survived.
After a quiet moment, the momentum was back again as Nobara looked at the two boys with a disgruntled expression, her exaggerated self on display at the lack of reaction to her return. "You know, the class's Madonna, who everyone thought was dead, by the way, turned out to be alive?! You two should be either wetting yourself or crying with joy!"
Megumi didn't even bat an eye, unlike Yuji, who was scrambling out of his mind, replying to her in his usual stoic and flat voice. "I see. My bad."
"So, the bastard is dead then." The Fushiguro didn't phrase that like a question, more so stating a fact. The fact that he was here in his own body, alive and breathing, undoubtedly meant that the curse was dead. It was still surreal to utter, knowing that this was the one thing they'd all been fighting for since forever. Maybe now, everyone who was gone didn't die in vain.
Nobara sounded like she was still in disbelief, shaking her head slightly while she grinned and exclaimed, "Ha! Yeah! Itadori beasted that guy like it was a piece of cake!"
"Eh.. well, it was pretty tough, I'm not gonna lie. I cried a little when resonance was hit." Yuji himself could only scratch the back of his neck at the rare praise, his eyes crinkling into thin lines as he admitted his own emotions. It was kind of daunting to be the one who killed Sukuna with the fact that he used to be the curse's vessel. But out of everything, making that final blow was something he didn't once hesitate on. Yuji was going to finish all this madness. It all started with him and ended with him—the way it should be.
Megumi didn't sound too surprised at the boy's admission, only giving him a look in response. "I know. I saw everything happening inside Sukuna."
"Ugh... don't even remind me. Well, at least you two have the shared experience of being a vessel now." No matter how sour the fact was, it was true.
Breaking his thoughts, Yuji suddenly lit up as he shifted through his pants pockets, haphazardly pulling out the crumpled pieces of paper in his hand. "Oh, wait guys. I have something for you two. It's from Gojo-sensei. Gojo-san, too, I think."
The pink-haired boy grew incredibly sullen at the mention of both his teachers. He'd miss calling out to the two Gojo's, mixing the couple up despite your previous urgings to the students of simply calling you by your first name. Of course, your husband would not absolutely have that, sneakily going behind your back and basically forcing his students to call you Gojo, too. If he couldn't get the second years to follow, he'd make his own kids do it. The man would not pass on the chance of hearing people call you by your shared last name.
"A letter.." Megumi looked shocked at the fact. His sensei (and self-proclaimed dad who stepped up) never did this kind of thing—seriously, that is.
Growing up with Gojo and his wife, Megumi knew the white-haired sorcerer never strayed away from being lighthearted and childlike. Despite witnessing the lanky heir change from the bratty 18-year-old who approached him as a child in the streets into the mature, married man he was the last time, it just wasn't in his nature to be doing some sentimental things like this. That was more like something you'd do. From the daily lunch notes, deep-meaning gifts (that he still kept to this day), and the affectionate texts you'd always send, he would wager that you might've been the one to drag your husband to write the letters. But, knowing that Gojo probably had a feeling that he wouldn't make it out of the fight, it's not impossible that this truly came from him.
Nobara chuckled at his tone of voice, silently agreeing with his disbelief. Gojo was definitely not the type to do this.. it unsettled her.
"I feel you.. this is totally not like him. It's slightly gross to even imagine him writing letters.."
Though, after reading, she crushed the piece of paper in her hand, pursing her lips. Yuji noticed this, facing her to ask what it said. With slight hesitation, Nobara revealed that it contained information about her mother's whereabouts. To be honest, she wasn't sure how to feel. Some part of her still longed to feel her love.
"Oh, did you even want to know in the first place?"
She shook her head as she looked down, leaving no room for the topic to be continued. "Not at all."
Suddenly, they heard the very, very rare sound of Megumi's laughter ringing out from the bed. Gojo would've bawled knowing he made his son laugh. It took a moment for them to snap out of the shock, seeing the fresh face of their friend's smile. He looked like a brand new person—content, young and carefree. It was refreshing.
Megumi hasn't felt this happy in a long while. He expected that the message wouldn't be some deep, meaningful thing, but out of everything, it was a joke about how he killed his biological dad. He wasn't sad, surprisingly. Megumi never really knew the man that left him and his sister to fend for themselves, and the memories he had of him weren't great. At least he found some closure. The boy shook his head, reading the familiar and large handwriting of his father figure. You'd think that it'd be messy, but as the former heir of the Gojo clan, Satoru was a trained guy in the art of handwriting. He wouldn't be caught dead with scribbles.
Unfortunately your father isn't around anymore!! Cuz I killed him!! Sowwy!! :P
Short, simple, and kind of foolish.
He bit back a grin. Even in death, the man couldn't take anything seriously.
Beneath it was a softer and more serious note. From you, of course. Megumi did not doubt that you wrote this to make up for your husband's short message, writing a heartfelt one that he could sense even before reading. The two of you must've known that this was not a fight you would come out of. And as much as that hurt him, Megumi was glad that he was in your last thoughts. It meant a lot to know that you and Gojo believed he, Nobara, and Yuji would live through everything.
Firstly, don't take this idiot too seriously. If you're reading this megs, we're probably gone, but hey, you're okay! Live your life fully okay? Don't forget that you're still a kid in the end. We're always looking out for you, sweetheart. ♡
There was a chibi doodle in the bottom and a sweet greeting that said,
— Love you beyond infinity, mom & dad
Megumi could tell that this was Gojo's handwriting. It was meant as a joke (the boy didn't call Satoru dad very often, despite calling you mom. It was kinda cringe.) but he accepted that sincerely. You two were his parents, biological or not. He loves you so much.
And he'd promise that for you. For Satoru, too, to be honest.
To live life fully.
Ever since he knew what living meant, he never intended to live a proper life. The absence of his biological father and the death of his mother left an untreated wound in his heart, altering his mind in a way that left him isolated—a recluse from the world, almost. The only thing that used to keep him going was his sister, Tsumiki. Now she is really gone. But then, everything shifted when he first saw Gojo Satoru.
It was a big change to have people to look up to. To have a mother. Megumi called you mom way before he even considered Satoru as his father figure, and it was one of the most precious things in life. You never took that for granted, always spoiling him and treating him like he came from your own womb. You knew you'd never take the place of his biological mother, but you wanted to be someone the boy could rely on in such a cruel world. It was a bit strange when Satoru first brought up the idea of raising the Fushiguro boy. You were both still 18, barely even adults with so much pressure and responsibilities. But you knew, from the moment you saw this poor boy getting dragged home by your boyfriend, that you'd love him like no other.
You and Satoru gave him and Tsumiki a home. An unlikely one, but a home nonetheless. You gave him a love like no other, an unconditional, wholehearted, and absolute kind of love, even when the two of you were struggling. It was a type that couldn't be described by words and only felt. That, along with the friendship and true family he found within Nobara and Yuji, made him realize that even if he didn't live his life for himself, there were others in the world. Other people, whether that'd be a mother, a father, a sister, or a brother could give everything meaning. A reason to keep going.
At first, he only lived for Tsumiki. To use everything he had to save her. But then he found himself living for you, for Satoru, for Nobara and Yuji. Once more, he would try again. This wasn't a chance he'd take for granted.
Reading the note made Megumi feel a kind of warmth he hadn't felt in a long time. The kind that he last felt when you hugged him tightly and kissed his forehead before everything in Shibuya happened. That was probably the last time he saw you happy and alive. The world was dull when you died. A victim of that son of a bitch curse Mahito. That was a loss like no other, so incredibly painful and numbing.
At least you died in an honorable way.
After that, he didn't know how to function. Tsumiki, Nobara, and now you. The boy felt half of his soul chip away.
Your husband was even worse. Inconsolable. Watching his wife die in front of his eyes before getting sealed the second after. When the man came out of the prison realm, anyone could tell he wasn't the same. There was no chance the old Gojo would ever return. And sure, he was still lighthearted, but Megumi could tell there was a weight in his gait—the heavy burden of the loss of his darling wife dragging down every word that came out of his mouth. He saw the sadness, longing, anger, and pure vengeance in his eyes. It never did go away. Not even when Sukuna butchered the man in half. At least now, the two of you were together in the afterlife. Megumi truly hoped that. He didn't believe much in that kind of stuff, but for his mother and his father, he prayed for a final peace to be granted.
That hope—along with the one amongst the living pushed Megumi to go on. To not just survive but to really live. Even beyond that, there were others too. His cousin, Maki, who was thankfully alive, and even Toge and Panda.
This was love. That unanswered purpose of life. It's to give love and find love in others. Love is why people do crazy things: to sacrifice the world, to sacrifice themselves. That's why he kept living even when his own dad disappeared or why he kept fighting to keep his sister alive. Love is why, despite the grief, Satoru still fought for you, for your memory, and for your efforts. Love is the reason he's alive.
And if anything, Megumi learned that when you have people in your life, you'd do anything to keep them in it. That's what you and Satoru taught him. Waking up in his own body again and greeted by the sight of his best friends—that was one of the biggest blessings he has ever received.
For his family, he would do anything.
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i'm fucking crying. like actually. 3 chapters to go until this manga ends and i still can't fathom everything happening bruv
btw, this is what i imagine the letter would look like haha. half cannonical cuz it's the panel translation!! excuse my handwriting um
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also sorry this isn't really proofread lol, i really wanted to post!!
masterlist
dividers @cafekitsune @i-mmaculatus
858 notes ¡ View notes
mooncleaver ¡ 1 year ago
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aw being on the taglist would be awesome! really can't wait for the next chapter ❤️
You Are Not One of Us (Poseidon x Norse Goddess!reader) - Part 7
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Full Request Part
AN: I am so so sorry that this took me so long! I’m ngl, I lost a bit of inspiration for this for a while but I kinda forced myself to sit down and write it and it felt really good to finish something I felt I had given up on! I tried to make it a big one to make up for all the time I was gone! 
I also went back and read all the Anon messages I got from so many people and they really helped me, so thank you to absolutely everyone and all the anons who contributed ideas. I def included some in this part (and the coming parts) so if you spot it, I hope you enjoy it! 
Also, for the timing of his birthday versus when he started at Yancy Academy, IDK guys, I made it up. I don’t actually know about when he started versus when his birthday was so just… let it go ig. 
ALSO, I copied the dialogue for the diner scene almost verbatim from the show so I can’t take credit for writing that, but the descriptions attached to the dialogue are still mine. 
PS. I got a new divider that I love heheheh 
Also, I really hope y’all notice the significance of each of his birthday presents because I worked so unnecessarily hard on those. 
Summary: In one place, Percy grows up with his Aunt Sally, dealing with the struggles of being a demigod child. In another, you try to pretend you haven’t just given up your son and a life you have always wanted. Neither world is going as one would hope. 
Word count: 7.3k
Trigger Warnings: she/her pronouns, AFAB reader, profanity, innuendo, age gap (even tho they are both thousands of years old), personal insecurity, insecurity about one’s parenting, absentee parents technically, light angst, Percy believing there is something wrong with him, negative view of one’s own ADHD and dyslexia, any warnings associated with Percy’s adventures, (please let me know if I missed any) 
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Percy Jackson and the Olympians characters. I do not claim to own any of the Percy Jackson and the Olympians characters. I do not own any pictures used nor do I claim to do so. 
Always appreciate comments, likes, and reblogs :)
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When you returned to Valhalla, you tried to put on a brave face. Your return was denoted by a grand feast, and the Aesir were simply so happy to see you return no one questioned the way you occasionally turned away to brush off stray tears or gazed at Yggdrasil as if you wanted to see into one of the worlds nestled in its branches. But aside from all of that, you were rather good at pretending to be happy. You drank a few sips of ale for every mug Thor drained, you danced half the night with Baldur, and you sat cosied up with Loki, ready to listen to whatever story of his latest shenanigans he wished to bestow on you. Everyone was happy. Things were as they were meant to be. 
As the sun began to creep toward the horizon and the Aesir made their way out of the grand hall, you found yourself walking with Odin back to your old quarters in Valhalla. When he first came up to you as you stood from the feast table, he had wrapped you up in his arms, whispering how he was happy at your return. Even now, he occasionally turns to look at you with his remaining eye and smiles gently. The walk was peaceful, quiet, a stillness in the air at that hour just before dawn. 
“Do you know what I gave up my eye for?” He asked out of the blue. You furrowed your eyebrows, tilting your head and looking at him almost incredulously. 
“Of course, all the gods know, you sacrificed your eye for all the knowledge of the world.” 
“Hm,” he nodded. Then he stopped in the hallway and turned to fully face you. You clasped your hands in front of you, heart suddenly beating just a little faster. “Did you know that this also means I know about Perseus?” 
You could suddenly hear the blood rushing in your ears. You could see Odin in front of you, but you also couldn’t. Your hands were sweaty and your dress was suddenly tight around your ribs. You looked up at him, shallow breaths blowing from your lips. But then Odin smiled, a small sad smile that somehow broke your heart just that little bit more. 
“I am the only one that knows, and it should be kept that way.” He reached out and caressed your cheek, and you closed your eyes, a tear slipping down your cheek that he wiped away. “If it were different, I would have cherished meeting him.” Then he pulled away and walked back in the direction of the feasting hall. You listened to his footsteps fade away, before entering the room you had left behind for millenia. 
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Every year, without fail, it rained on Percy’s birthday. When he first noticed, he thought it meant something special. That there was something magical out there, wishing him well. Whatever higher power was out there, they knew he loved to swim, to be in the water, and they sent the rain just for him. As he grew, he began simply chalking it up to weather patterns. August was just the time of year when rain happened upon the city. It wasn’t anything special, this was simply the one part of his life where he was lucky. 
Sally knew it was a blessing. She knew it was his father, celebrating the day in the best way he knew how, sending a message to Percy in the only way he could. She always took Percy outside, regardless of if the rain became a storm. She knew Percy would be safe in the rain. They made it a habit to go onto the fire-escape when the rain was at its worst, and they would spin around and dance and laugh. 
In all the time Sally had spent raising Percy, through all the challenges and the struggles, she never failed to notice how alike to his mother he was. Percy, seemingly since he was born, was obsessed with the colour blue. He only wanted to eat blue food, only wanted to wear blue clothes (it took a lot of convincing to introduce other colours to his wardrobe) and all the toys he chose were blue. He had an immense sweet tooth, and every time she watched him bite into a blue chocolate chip cookie, she fondly remembered the afternoon she had sat with his mother and watched the ravenous pregnant woman devour an entire tray of those same cookies. He smiled brightly and constantly, always happy and mischievous, just like his mother. But he was also trapped like his mother. He also cried like his mother. And most of all, both good and bad, he loved just as sincerely, as fiercely as his mother. 
Every year on Percy’s birthday, this fierce love was demonstrated. A surprise present would arrive, wrapped in shiny blue wrapping paper with only ‘To Percy Jackson’ written on it in loopy, elegant handwriting. Each year the box contained something different, something odd but somehow heartwarming and special. Sometimes he didn’t know why in the world someone would send him these things, but they felt important, and he kept them lined up on the chest of drawers opposite his bed, and counted them each night before he went to bed. At least when he was still living at home. He even had presents from years he didn’t remember, going all the way from his first birthday to his latest. 
On his first birthday, he had apparently received a spool of golden thread. For the life of him he couldn’t understand why someone would give a one year old thread. It’s a choking hazard! What were they thinking?! But it was beautiful and shiny, and sometimes he thought it might just be real gold, but he didn’t want to find out if it was. It somehow felt… more than just something for money. He used it only for the most important things, but however much he seemed to unravel, the thread never seemed to end. 
On his second birthday, the package was smaller. Sally sat him up and unwrapped it in front of him to reveal a little toy throne. It was small, about the size of an adult hand, and made of hard resin. It was so intricate, coloured like the ocean, even white and frothy in some places, and looked as if it was made with the whorls of the ocean. It had been his favourite little toy for a long time. 
His third birthday present was simply a feather. It was beautiful, and no matter how much he crushed the fibres or threw it around, it never lost its perfect shape. It came with a flat metal stand that had a little foam rectangle in the centre so he could stick the tip of the feather into it and leave it as a decoration. The metal stand was simply labelled ‘Pegasus’ and three year old Percy staunchly believed it was a feather from the wing of a Pegasus. Even at the ripe old age of thirteen he sometimes still liked to hope it was a feather from Pegasus, simply so he could believe that magic existed. 
For his fourth birthday, he received a framed painting. Even at four years old he thought it was weird, and he still believed it was an absolutely insane present to get a four year old. A painting? Seriously? It was beautiful though, and he appreciated it a lot more once he was older than he did at the time. He didn’t know where it was supposed to show, there was no date and no artist’s signature. The edges showed that the viewer was looking through the mouth of a cave onto some type of secret hidden lake. Trees surrounded the lake, and it had the most beautiful clear water. The artist had even depicted the rocks at the bottom, and sometimes, in the quietest and stillest moments of the day, if he looked really hard at the painting, he could almost see the water lapping at the shore. He could almost hear the gentle chirp of birds and the soft rustle of leaves. The entire painting always made him feel so odd, as if he could feel someone’s else's memories, someone else’s feelings. Someone had been happy there once, but now they only looked at it with sadness, as if a wonderful day by the lake had been ruined by a fight in the car on the way home. 
His fifth birthday present was just as odd as the rest of them. He still didn’t quite understand why someone had gifted him five oysters with pearls inside of them. He didn’t believe the pearls were real (that was the only reason he hadn’t pawned or sold them off so he could get some extra money for his Aunt Sally) simply because he had never seen an oyster like that. No one had, not even google. He thought they were pretty though, and kept them lined up on the back of his nightstand rather than on the chest of drawers. 
His favourite birthday present, from all those he had ever received, came on his sixth birthday. It was a conch shell, bigger than both the palms of his hands put together, with a dark blue colour that slowly faded to white as it twisted in on itself. Normally when he held it up to his ear, he could hear the sea, but unlike any other conch he had ever listened to. He could hear waves crashing, he could hear the ruffling and snuffling sort of sound they made as they frothed onto the shore. He could hear the swoosh as the waves pulled back. He could even hear the distant sort of gurgling a person hears when they’re underwater in the ocean, the sound of water moving about you. But then, at the darkest parts of the night, when he couldn’t sleep for whatever reason and pressed the shell to his ear, he could hear a gentle voice whispering ‘I love you’. It was soft, but calming and loving, the kind of ‘I love you’ a father whispers to his son just as he puts him to bed. He had never heard the voice before, but secretly he always wished it was somehow the voice of his own father. He tried not to think about that as much anymore. His father simply wasn’t here. 
A little zombie looking figurine arrived for his seventh birthday. This one felt a little more kid-appropriate, and he had loved playing with it when he was still into action figures. For a while he hadn’t known what character it was supposed to be, because while it looked like a zombie, it didn’t really look like the zombie figurines he had seen some of the other kids play with. The little circle that connected the two feet of the figurine was engraved with the word ‘Draugr’ and Aunt Sally had had to google that for him. The stories had scared him so much that for a while he had hidden the figure in the back of his toybox. 
By the time his eighth birthday had rolled around, he had begun to grow an interest in Greek mythology and the stories of Greek heroes. When he received a little storybook on Perseus and his adventures, he had asked Sally if she was the one sending him the secret presents. It had to be his Aunt Sally. She knew he liked Greek mythology, she had been the one to tell him that he was named after Perseus. Sure, the earlier gifts had been really weird, but maybe she had just become a better gift-giver over time? But Aunt Sally denied it, and when they opened the book, a little picture had been put in as a bookmark. It depicted a cabin high up on the cliffs of the fjords, small but homely looking, and it was simply marked with the word Norway in the bottom corner in that same loopy handwriting. Sally had simply replied “see, it can’t be from me because I’ve never even been to Norway. Plus, kid, have you ever seen me write that neatly?” He had sat there and read the entire book, pushing through even though the letters bounced around and sometimes he had to look completely away to be able to try and focus again. He kept the picture in the book and the book on his nightstand as well. Though he had read it countless times, thumbed each page a million times, the book still looked good as new. 
On his ninth birthday he got… a jar of sand. He was pretty disappointed at first, staring at it for a whole minute after he had taken it out of the wrapping. But then he saw that a little label had been pasted onto the top of the metal lid of the jar that simply said ‘Montauk’ and he realised it must be from the beach in front of the cabins they went to every year. It was seemingly sentimental, and it had made Aunt Sally smile all sad and happy and teary that he had told her to keep it in her room, so it would stay safe. 
On his tenth birthday, he only received an envelope. It was made of the same shimmery blue paper as the wrapping of all the other gifts he had ever received, and it had the same loopy handwriting, but it had been pushed under the door. Aunt Sally usually got her letters from the box downstairs, he had thought it was weird, but she had told him not to worry, that this must be special because it was his birthday. The only thing in the envelope was a picture. It was square, and about the size of a polaroid, but glossy like it had been taken by a digital camera and printed at some fancy shop. He couldn’t quite tell what it was at first. It looked like it was taken underwater, he could see little flecks of seaweed floating and sand that had been kicked up by the waves and little bubbles here and there. He could see the sandy floor as well, the way some of it was mid-movement with the waves. ‘Midnight on Montauk - where the water meets the sand’ was written on the back, and he thought it was weird that he had gotten two gifts from Montauk now. Nevertheless, he pinned the picture to the corkboard above his chest of drawers. 
On his eleventh birthday he got a gold coin. He was so excited at first. This was the first time he had ever gotten money as a present, let alone a frickin’ gold coin! He had even promised Aunt Sally he would take her out for ice cream with the money from the coin. But then he had looked at it again and realised that it was stamped with a trident on both sides. He had suddenly deflated, thinking it was some kind of gimmick coin they sold at souvenir shops (this gift-giver seemed to be way too sentimental) but Aunt Sally had quickly pressed it into his palm and told him to keep it very very safe. He kept it on him at all times now. At least some of his jeans had that little seemingly useless pocket, making it easy for him to carry it around. 
His last birthday, the one right before everything went wrong for the millionth time and got him sent to Yancy Academy, had brought a flat box filled with shredded paper. Nestled inside it was a framed weather report from the day he had been born. At the top was the cut out of a headline ‘Largest Storm to Ever Hit Montauk and all of New York’. Below it, there were a bunch of different images, from graphs about the intensity of the rainfall to satellite images of the eye of the storm and the area it covered. He thought it was kind of funny, and he put it up proudly on the chest of drawers. That day was the first time in a long time he had thought the rain on his birthday really meant something again. Maybe it wasn’t something special for him, maybe it was just the weather remembering the storm it had put on that day, and sending some rain in its memory. But it meant something. 
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Grover heard whispers in his dreams. He never quite remembered what they were, never quite remembered what they said, but he knew that something whispered to him in his sleep. A woman, a soft, lilting voice that sounded just out of reach, was all that he had gleaned thus far. He didn’t know if the forces were good or bad, where the voice came from, but whenever he awoke there was a small niggling feeling inside him that he should be doing something. Deep in the pit of his stomach he felt like he had to be outside Camp Half-Blood, had to be chasing something or maybe finding something. It was an itch that no other satyr duty seemed to satiate. No amount of berries collected, animal cages cleaned, campfires attended made him forget the voice, forget the desire to follow its orders, whatever they may be. 
When he got his next mission to escort a demigod back to the camp, everything seemed to click into place inside him. When he was told that he would be responsible for bringing Percy Jackson safely back to the camp, it was like the gods themselves had come in and soothed whatever had been writhing inside him. This was what he had been waiting for. This was what the whispers had commanded for him. And somehow, he knew that this was the most important journey in his entire life… 
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Three days before Percy’s twelfth birthday, a blue butterfly landed on his hand as he sat outside his latest school. It was the end of his first official week at Yancy Academy, and the school was rather… daunting. All the kids looked at him like he was dirt beneath their shoes and nothing seemed to be clicking with him. He was trying his best. When the kids whispered about him, he ignored it. When they started messing with his things, he just asked his teachers for new notebooks and moved on. Whatever they did, he chose to try peace and quiet. He didn’t want to make life even more difficult for his Aunt Sally, she was already doing everything she could to make sure he had a decent school to go to; this was their last chance and he wasn’t going to be the one that screwed it up. 
He sighed and rested his elbows on his crossed legs, staring out at the yard. If nothing else, at least Yancy had a nice garden to look at. He hadn’t noticed the fluttering little creature until it was directly in his line of sight. It took a few turns around in front of his face before landing directly on the tip of his nose. The little legs were slightly ticklish and he breathed out of his mouth to resist the urge to sneeze. 
It was beautiful. It almost glowed in the light, like a haze was surrounding its edges, and he reached up to gently touch the tip of its wing. It shattered right in front of his eyes, like a glass breaking against the floor. The little pieces floated all around and landed on his clothes, sticking to his jeans. He stared at his lap, wide eyed. What the- He closed his eyes and took three deep breaths in, a technique one of the many councillors had taught him to try and re-centre himself in the world. When he opened his eyes again, the pieces were still there, like glitter all over his clothes, but they were beginning to fade. 
Percy stared at his clothes, at the fading pieces of a butterfly that had somehow flown directly to him then shattered like glass, and stood up with a determination to forget this ever happened. He shook his head, as if to shake his brain into action. It wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. No one would believe him anyway. This was just another pegasus in the window. He wouldn’t speak of it until the next time he was at home. Aunt Sally could calm him down, Aunt Sally would make him feel better and they would solve this. There was just something fundamentally wrong with him, they needed to fix it soon. With a clench of his fist, he walked back inside, only to bump directly into someone who quickly introduced themselves as Grover Underwood….
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“And then Grover beat me, Aunt Sally!” Percy told her excitedly as they sat at the dining table ravenously devouring stacks of blue pancakes. Sally smiled down at the boy, reaching forward and ruffling his curly hair as he shoved another forkful into his mouth. 
“Grover sounds awesome, I’m glad you guys found each other,” she told him happily, pretending like the satyr hadn’t already introduced himself as Percy’s guardian. “If you want, you can invite him up here today, we can have a little birthday party.” 
“Nah, todays about you and me Aunt Sally,” he smiled brightly up at her, syrup painting the corners of his mouth, and she stood up to press a kiss to the top of his head. 
“Alright then mister, have I got plans for you this weekend! I was gonna get us passes for the waterpark today but I knew it was gonna rain so it’s been postponed for tomorrow. Today will start with a swim at the indoor pool in a country club in Manhattan! Someone I know gave me her pass for the weekend,” Sally giggled, reaching out to high five Percy as he exclaimed ‘no way!’. 
“Is it Denise? I love Denise,” Percy asked excitedly, momentarily forgetting his plate. 
“No, I mentioned to one of my regular customers that it’s your birthday this weekend and that you love to swim so she got us signed up as her guests for the weekend!” Sally explained, smiling triumphantly. 
Though she always tried her hardest, sometimes she felt like Percy missed out on a better life because she didn’t make enough money. But Percy simply jumped up and hugged her tightly, whispering a ‘thank you’ against her ear. 
“Hold on, you haven’t even heard the entire plan!” She exclaimed, laughing as he pulled away and raised his hands as if in surrender. “Ok, so, then we’re gonna go get ice cream, I found this cool place near the country club that has a bunch of blue ice creams and I thought we could get a scoop of each so we have those cones piled with like ten scoops. Then we’ll come back here for a mov-” 
There was a knock at the door. Sally frowned for a second, turning to the door, but there was no other sound and she looked back to Percy as something dawned on her. She smiled gently, a rather wistful look in her eyes all of a sudden, and got up from where she was sitting adjacent to him. 
“That must be your special present.” Percy swallowed his latest too-big mouthful and got up from the table to meet Aunt Sally in the hallway. 
It was cube shaped this time, about the size of both his palms put together, and it had simply been left in front of their door. Sally brought the box inside and they stood by the window to look at it in the dim grey light from outside. It was covered in that same shiny blue wrapping paper as every other year, and his name was written in that same loopy style with a fresh black pen. His face was contorted in confusion and he took it from Sallys hands, ripping through the wrapping paper to the baby blue cardboard box beneath. He opened that too and Sally watched on curiously as he pulled out something wrapped in bubble wrap. Percy pulled the little pieces of tape holding it together and unfolded the sheet of wrapping to find a snowglobe nestled inside. 
The little stand that the orb was perched on was a blue so dark it was almost black, and smooth, without any engraving or description of the scene inside the ball. The globe itself showed a little scene of what looked like a campground, with lots of cabins and a big bonfire in the middle. It even had a little sign pointing in different directions, and had an open-air pavilion near the edge. It was cute, a little fancy, but he had no idea why in the world someone would send this to him. He had never been to camp before, but especially not this camp, whatever it was. He held it up to Sally and frowned at it. 
“I have no idea where this is,” he told her, but she was staring at it so intensely that he paused. Percy raised an eyebrow and pushed it toward her. “You know where this is? Have you been here before?” At first Sally didn’t answer, because yes, she knew where it was, she knew exactly what the snow globe was showing her, and she knew that it was a message. It meant that soon, she would have to say goodbye to Percy, and soon Percy would know everything she had been hiding from him his entire life. 
“It’s a campground, right?” She asked nonchalantly, “it’s cute though, I like it. Keep it on your dresser, I’m sure one day you’ll know more about it.” And she shrugged as if that day wasn’t coming very soon. 
Percy shrugged in return and went to his room to put the snowglobe on the dresser. A beam of sunlight had broken through the clouds and sparkled in the rain right onto his dresser. The water in the painting looked like it was moving again, and a phantom wind ruffled the fibres on the feather. He put the snowglobe between them carefully, directly in the light of the sun, and a little bit of glitter in the globe shined directly onto his eye. He squinted and bent down to look at it again. There, hidden behind one of the cabins because of the way he had been holding it earlier, was a tiny blue butterfly. It was so small it was easy to miss, but it looked exactly like the butterfly that had come to him. Percy felt his heart begin to race. Surely this was a coincidence. He blinked and rubbed his eyes roughly, then looked down at the snowglobe again. It was still there. The butterfly almost looked like it flapped its wings in the sunlight. No, surely not, this was just another sign that he was going crazy, that there was something really wrong with him. 
Percy shoved the snowglobe behind the painting and walked right back out to find Aunt Sally. She was sitting on the sofa waiting for him, smiling when he came over to her, but quickly her lips drooped into a frown at the look on his face. 
“Hey buddy, what’s wrong?” She asked, pulling him down to sit beside her. 
“Aunt Sally, I seriously think there’s something wrong with me. It’s happening again, it’s exactly like the horse on the rooftop and I-I don’t kno-” 
“Hey. Ok, let’s take a deep breath. Ok, good, one, two, three, four, ok now big release. Alright, good, now, start from the beginning.” She gently cupped his cheek for a moment before folding her hands in her lap and watching his face. 
“I was sitting in the garden at Yancy, I don’t know, I’d had kind of a crummy day, I guess, but then suddenly this butterfly came fluttering to me. Aunt Sally, I have never seen a butterfly like that. It’s like it wasn’t real. It was all shiny and like-like it was glowing? I don’t know, it just didn’t seem like it actually existed. But it came right up to me and landed on my nose. And I thought that was so cool, so I kinda just reached up and touched it. I mean, I didn’t even really touch it, the tip of my finger kinda just brushed it, but then it burst. I don’t even know, it shattered like it was made of glass. And that’s crazy because that’s not possible. Animals don’t shatter like that, nothing real shatters like that and just disappears. It broke into glitter and was all over me! I was trying to brush it off but it-it just wouldn’t come off, and then slowly, it just started to… fade away. Just like that. Ugh, I don’t know Aunt Sally, I seriously think there’s something wrong with me. I mean, it’s not normal to be seeing visions, even I know that.” 
“There’s nothing wrong with you. I believe you,” she added simply, staring at him as if everything he had just said was the most important words to ever have come out of someone’s mouth. 
“What?” Percy tilted his head and looked at her with a frown, as if suddenly she was the crazy one, not him. 
“I believe you. I believe that that happened to you, but we’ll talk about that some other time.” She smiled sadly at him, reaching out to gently brush the hair away from his forehead. Percy scoffed, pulling back from her slightly. 
“What does that even mean? You just said you believed me, we need to talk about it now.” 
“Percy, when the time is right, we’ll talk about it,” Sally sighed, knowing she couldn’t delay this conversation for much longer. She just wanted him to be a kid as long as possible… “But today is your birthday, and we’re supposed to be having fun before you go back to school. So come on,” she clapped her hands and stood up, “there is a bag of blue jelly beans sitting in the kitchen with your name on it!” She sing-songed. 
“But Aunt Sally-” 
“Percy. Some other time.” Her lips were set in a line and her tone left no more room for argument. Sally left him to go to her room to start packing a backpack with stuff they would need for the pool, while Percy made his way to the kitchen and began slowly chewing on blue jelly beans, his mind stuck on the butterfly. 
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That night, after a long day of swimming, and a little too much sugar, Sally sat in the middle of little garden they had made on their floor of the fire escape and let the rain douse her. She had already shoved a hungover Gabe into bed and locked the door on him in case he wanted to come back out and make any noise that disturbed Percy, and now, under the rain, she let her thoughts wander to the past thirteen years. 
Life with Percy had been as beautiful and loving as it had been difficult. She had known, from the beginning, that Percy would not be a normal kid. As much as his parents wanted him to be, as much as she wanted it for him, it simply wouldn’t happen. He was too special, the product of two worlds too incomprehensible. 
She remembered all the calls to schools. He couldn’t sit still, he couldn’t learn, he was too ‘disruptive’, too ‘distracted’. Each time it boiled her blood, broke her heart, because he wasn’t even made for this world, but these people had the audacity to reduce this child to what they considered bad things. She remembered all the times he would cry, clinging to her with his little hands wondering why he couldn’t be like the other kids, why he couldn’t focus like other kids or why he couldn’t study like the other kids, why he didn’t have parents like the other kids… 
She remembered the first time she had told little Percy about his dad. How excited he had been to learn that somewhere out there, he did have parents, parents who loved him and wanted to be with him but for some inexplicable reason, couldn’t. She had seen the way he had slowly dismissed that childish hope as he grew up, how he stopped asking about his mom, how he stopped wondering if he looked like his dad. He never asked anymore. 
The day she had used the coin suddenly floated to the front of her mind as she wiped the water from her eyes. She remembered it vividly. It had been a bad day. The baddest of days at that point. Percy was struggling, and she was on edge. There was a storm. It was still the years when she had been scared of storms, when they reminded her of the day Percy was born, the fear in Y/n’s eyes, the pain in Poseidon’s. She had driven them away from yet another school and decided to stop at a diner for lunch. Maybe ice cream would improve Percy’s mood. 
They had eaten in silence, neither of them ready to talk to the other. She had tried to make a few jokes before the food came, hoping to lift Percy’s mood, but he had simply pushed the salt and pepper shakers around the table and mumbled answers to her. After that she had given up on her attempts and sat in silence, staring out of the window and stewing in her own struggles. Maybe this was her breaking point, she thought. Maybe this was the moment when she couldn’t raise Percy anymore. She was struggling, and the last thing she wanted to do was to ruin his life because she couldn’t cope with raising a godly child. What could she do? No one could understand her situation, she couldn’t even talk to anyone about it. Was this the time to send him to camp? Was it the time to let him go, for his sake? Tears had begun to prick at her eyes but she wiped them away as the server had come by. 
They had finished their mains, and she had ordered a sundae for Percy in as excited a voice as she could manage, glad to see a little smile begin to curl at his lips. The server had engaged with him as well, asking him what toppings he wanted and how many ‘extras’ to add before telling the chef he wanted chocolate sauce. She had smiled at the server in thanks before telling Percy to stay put as she got up from the stall and went to the bar to settle the bill. 
At the bar, she asked for a glass of tap water and the bill, and when the bartender had deposited both, she pulled a coin out of her pocket. It was gold, and had tridents embossed on both sides. Even though she’d had it for years now, it hadn’t lost its shine. She brought the cup of water closer to her and flipped the coin over it, watching it twist in the air before falling into the water with a little ‘plonk’. She closed her eyes and whispered two names to herself, over and over and over. A crack of thunder shook through the diner, as if the storm was right overhead. She opened her eyes and stared into the glass of water as the door to the diner opened and someone walked in. The stool beside her was pulled out, and someone settled onto it with a slight creak. The sleeve of their shirt brushed against hers and the smell of salty sea air suddenly seemed to waft around her. She closed her eyes and whispered one of the names again, but nothing changed. Tears pricked at her eyes again, and she stared ahead of her, unable, unwilling, to look at the man that had settled down beside her. 
“This isn’t fair,” she whispered, a tear escaping down her cheek. 
“No, it isn’t,” he replied quietly, his gruff voice comforting and painful at the same time. 
“And I am failing.” She clenched her hands around the cup of water at the uncomfortable truth of it all. More tears slipped out of her eyes now, easier than the first. 
“No, you’re not,” he answered instantly, and still neither of them looked at each other. For all anyone knew, they were strangers sitting beside each other at a bar. Sally closed her eyes and gulped, her eyes fluttering open as breathing became just that little more painful as she tried to keep a handle on herself. 
“I’m going to take him to camp,” she told him, releasing her grip around the glass of water and pushing it forward slightly. 
“Are you sure?” He asked simply, as if it was a casual decision, but she could still hear the gravity in the statement. 
“What choice do I have?” She whispered, “he and I living together in the city…” she paused, taking in a deep breath, “it’s starting to attract attention from your world.” He didn’t say anything, just pressed his lips together and stared at the floor behind the bar with an intensity that would make it crack if he truly wanted it to. “A winged horse followed him to school.” She let the statement settle into the air. “It saw him, he saw it. Sooner or later it’s not gonna be just pretty things that are following him,” she breathed out, shaking her head slightly and looking up to the ceiling as the tears pushed from her eyes again. 
It was so painful to sit here, mere steps from Percy, with the father he couldn’t meet. It was so painful, knowing that soon she would have to let him go, to let him fight his own battles. It was so painful knowing that there were forces much bigger than her little self, controlling everything, and making life so difficult for the beautiful little boy sitting just over there. 
“At camp, he will be safe,” she nodded to herself, taking a sharp breath in and staring at the ceiling, trying to convince herself that this was the best idea. 
“You don’t want him at camp,” he answered simply, as if he could look into her mind and see everything that she was thinking, as if he could look directly at her heart and see the immense amount of love she felt for that child. 
“No,” she breathed out painfully, “no, I don’t,” and she almost began crying with the words, clenching her eyes shut and shaking her head. 
“Tell me why,” he stated as he stared down at the wood of the bar but his attention was fully on her. 
“You don’t wanna know why,” she scoffed lightly, shaking her head and looking to the ceiling again. Then she smiled, a rueful, exasperated little smile as he let out a huff of a chuckle. 
“Probably not. But you have no one to say it to, and maybe that’s the most unfair part of it.” He paused, just for a moment, but her heart began to feel a little lighter somehow. “You say it, and I will listen.” They were silent, sitting together and listening to the quiet sounds of the bar, the clinking of spoons and glasses and plates, the rush of water inside the dishwasher. 
“I want him to know who he is, before your worlds try to tell him who they want him to be,” her voice was forceful, verging on spiteful. “He is better than that, he has better things in him than that.” She was full of conviction, this was a truth she knew better than anything else in the world. Poseidon continued staring at the bar as he spoke. 
“Then you have your answer. He’s going to go to school, and he’s going to learn things you can’t teach him there, and it’s going to be hard for the both of you. And it’s going to be torture for the both of you. But he will be stronger for it on the other side. His aunt raised him well.” And her tears flowed again, as if something in her chest released but brought with it a stabbing pain of everything that could not be. 
“Do you wanna talk to him?” She asked through tears, hoping against all hope that he would say yes. “I know you shouldn’t,” she began, trying to convince him somehow. “Maybe just hear his voice,” she whispered, but there was another crack of thunder in the sky, and Poseidon turned away, listening as if he could hear things she could not. 
“One day,” he simply whispered, and when she looked up to finally meet his eyes, to finally look at him again after so many years, no one was sitting there. 
She sat at the bar for another few minutes, staring into the glass of water as if it had all the answers, but not one reason floated up for the absence of the boy’s mother. 
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For thirteen years, you watched your son’s life in snippets. It was like a faulty connection on a tv, darkness one moment, then a flash of Percy smiling as he opened the new mystery present that had been left at his door. A moment of beauty and excitement as you watched him uncover pieces of the world that you and his father had created, the world that led to his being. Then darkness once more, a year of knowing nothing about his life no matter how hard you tried, then Percy crying in Sally’s arms, sobbing about his latest struggles at school, and a pain so sharp in your heart that you almost abandoned secrecy to go to him, then darkness again. You didn’t know why it was like this. Why you didn’t get to watch over him as you so hoped before he was born, why even a distant relationship was stolen from you. You spent days climbing over the roots of Yggdrasil, peering into different worlds and hoping to see Percy living his life. Even if you found a branch that looked into Midgard, you saw only the mountains, with little dots of people climbing up them that left you amused for a moment, or boats on the ocean that made your heart ache desperately for your husband. 
But you didn’t question it much either. Maybe it was his position between the two worlds of gods, the magic of the Fates and the Norns interfering with your powers, the mist cloaking him better than you had hoped. 
You continued with your life as it had been long before you knew of the existence of the Greek Pantheon. You filled your position as a good goddess should, protecting the people from threats bigger than them, refusing to interfere with the machinations of demigods and their quests. You had no way of knowing that this obstruction of your view was unnatural. How would you know that someone else’s designs were at play here? How could you possibly know that your own father was stopping you from hearing the desperate prayers meant for you, the pleas of your dear friend when she felt she could not cope? 
As you sat there beside Odin at the feast table, looking up to your father with reverence as he smiled cheerfully down at you, how were you to know he was actively hiding your son from you?
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