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:*Trigger Warning for Abuse:** An analysis of the nuanced depiction of abuse dynamics in *Baldur's Gate 3*. Please skip if you’re uncomfortable with this topic or you hate long rants (this tumbler page as truly just became about one of my special interests and if I don't info dump I'll explode 😂)

**Cazador at the Head of the Table, and His Forced Family, with Astarion as the Scapegoat**

Cazador is one of the best-written abusers in fiction, showcasing how abusers systematically break down their victims in a way that is thoughtful and non-voyeuristic.

Astarion often receives criticism for his behavior. While I don’t seek to excuse his actions as if he were a real person, I aim to understand how his experiences shape his character and a depiction of a non perfect victim.

One of the most compelling aspects of Astarion's story is the depiction of the "scapegoat" abuse tactic. This is where a caregiver selects one child as the primary target of ridicule and abuse. Astarion says, "He took a special pleasure in my pain. He said my screams sounded sweetest!" Often, the scapegoat is the child who most reminds the abuser of themselves when they were vulnerable. The abuser uses this child to demonstrate the consequences of disobedience, bonding the other children against the scapegoat. They will also inflict the trauma they were exposed to in a twisted way to re-gain their own power and autonomy, and to inflict their internalised negative self talk on others.

Cazador's tactics of infantilization are particularly gut-wrenching. He calls Astarion a "stupid little boy" and forces him to call him "father," undermining his belief in his ability to make adult decisions on his own while simultaneously also forcing him into adult work. A way to break down his self esteem and take away his autonomy. This adds another level to Cazador's twisted, intimate abuse.

It's evident when you ask if Astarion called Cazador "master" in the bedroom, and he reacts negatively. It is also implied in the dialogue, "One final thrust... and I'll be rid of you..." as Astarion stands over Cazador, ready to stab him with a phalic symbol and Cazador in a submissive position.

In a Shadowheart playthrough, we see how Astarion seeks someone to follow because he doesn’t know how to think for himself. Auntie Ethel remarks that he misses his chains, and he admits he doesn't know how to make his own decisions. In Astarion's dream, you learn one of Cazador's rules is that Astarion must stay by his side unless told otherwise. We also see that Cazador regularly dined with Astarion, serving him putrid rats. He says "I have spent two centuries with You, and that should be punishment enough," which is quite an intimate insult. In non of these are the other spawn mentioned. He also mentions his sarcasm and jokes, something you wouldn't really think Cazador would permit. This suggesting an intense, twisted co-dependency. A lot of time spent alone together. As what? His child? His slave? His lover? It's sickening. Cazador seemed to want to fill every potential key roll in Astarions life. This is actually pretty common in adults relationships.

The extent of physical abuse is further revealed when Astarion sees the mad doctor in the House of Healing and remarks, "he's just like Cazador." The narrator says, "If you're late, he will flay you... again," and Astarion states, "Sometimes he would have us submit to torture. Other times he would have us torture ourselves."

So, why does Cazador do all this? Beyond sadistic pleasure and rituals off higher power, I believe it's driven by a fear of abandonment. His goal is to strip Astarion of any autonomy so he would return even if freed. When speaking to Cazador alone, he's convinced Astarion will come back because he cannot think for himself. Cazador wants to be the center of Astarion's life, and truly believes he is. A narcissist needing to see himself reflected in others, he required Astarion by his side to validate his awful existence. If Astarion leaves, Cazador feels he's losing an extension of himself. That Astarion is his and his alone to kill.

I also believe he genuinely wants to play house. That he wants a picture perfect family. We don't know much about Cazador before the game, only that he was from a vampire family. That his niece refused to partake. It's quite clear he felt like he was missing something in his family. We know his master committed acts of cruelty far beyond what he did to his own spawn, impaling him for ten years and draining his friend Infront of him. Surly a year of solitude is like being sent to your bedroom without supper compared to that? By Cazadors logic, he's far kinder than he was ever treated. He's been kinder and more loving than his own family. His children should be grateful that he protected them from what he went through. He believes his children are spoiled and if anything he has been to soft. After all, he gave thim his families birth right far above their station, eternal life. He gave them a family that will never abandon them. What more could they want?

And if course, we as plays see this cycle continues with AA, who says he will be a far kinder master he'd never make his dear lover eat rats. They wouldn't be his child, more a pampered pet. Compared to how Astarion was treated, what more could they want?

And how very true to live that an abuser will preach about how much worse they had things and how lucky their victims are. How soft they must be to complain.

This gives us a clear picture of Astarion at the start: someone with a fragile sense of self, preferring to see others tortured rather than be the one in the chair, and looking for someone to follow. He'll fake a smile to keep them around. While this doesn't excuse his cruelty, it explains it; Astarion is free for less than a day when you meet him. There are no perfect victims, and unlearning brainwashing takes time. Reducing Astarion to "evil" or "good" overlooks the complexity of a character who could become either an abuser or a liberator.

What I appreciate most is that Astarion's past doesn't vanish when Cazador dies; he still carries the scars, but in a positive playthrough, there is hope. Astarion has the chance to do better, starts making his own choices, and sometimes gets it wrong.

Crucially, the abuse is never voyeuristic. It is always shown from the survivor's perspective, focusing on its effects on their lives. It's always clear when a player choice disrespects his growth and autonomy. Cazador and Astarion are never framed to titillate or as a mind of grousome special to the viewer, unlike in shows like *13 Reasons Why* or Ramsey Bolton in *Game of Thrones*. The game handles the topic with a lot of care. Infact the only time we see Cazador in person is when we have the chance to stop him. We never see Astarion subjected to something we can alter in some way.

Also, we do hear of Astarions bravery in trying to defy his master and save people. Unfortunately as in the game and real life, people don't always have a choice. Still, in a good ending Astarion can choose to try and help others who have been hurt and use what he has learned to make real change.

The reasons why Cazador is the way he is are another rant entirely. But while I hate him as a person, I adore him as an antagonist. How can a character be written to be pathetic and terrifying at once?

**TL;DR:** *Baldur's Gate 3* presents a complex, nuanced abuse narrative, executed beautifully. Many people overlook or disregard Astarion as an excellent depiction of survival in my opinion.

[moetartart]

My first ever Astarion commission completed! it's been so long since I've done anything like this so I'm just testing the waters. I'm thankful for the chance and allowing me to post it <3 ☺️

[moetartart]

So this is such a silly little rant but I have no where else to put it so here it is 😂 My very room temperature take.

Astarion gets a lot of hate for things Shadowheart is wubbified for.

I'd like to start by saying I love both charecters, I accept their flaws and that they can be evil. I love that for them. but I keep getting paragraphs written to me about how awful Astarion is and people really not liking my take that Shart is just as bad..

Shadowheart

.Not just pro torture but a pro AT torture which she brags about. No mind control needed (in the goblin camp and again she praises the doctor in the house of healing )

.Approves of lies and doing bad things

.is vein and narcissistic about her looks Tav-' your beautiful' Shart-'i know.'

.Will use and manipulate Tav (you get more than once insight check)

.Is racist (To the Gith mainly)

.Disapproves of you doing nice things -'that kind heart will get us all killed some day.' (Shadowheart disapproves)

.In her bad ending, even if you have done a fully good run and she has become a hero, she can still choose of her own free will to become a cult leader who abused others as she has been abused. No vampire mind control needed. (She has to give up memories, but not of her adventures with Tav)

.In her good ending she learns to live for herself going on adventures or settling down for a quiet life

Astarion -

. Approves of torture because he's smug he's not the one in the chair

.has done serious harm to others including children but had no control over his body and actions at the time 'He speaks, and our bodies move.'

.Approves of lies and doing bad things a LOT

.is vien and narcissistic about his looks 'AND beautiful! Not enough people mention that.'

.will use and manipulate Tav (admits it all on the confessions scene OR the rejection scene in act 3 if you don't help him in act 2)

.is racist (to the Gur and gnomes kinda? )

. Disapproves of doing nice things if they stray from his goal

.In his bad ending, he is consumed by evil energy that removes any good will he had, continuing the cycle of abuse. (If you use detect thoughts on a sleeping Cazador you will learn that his 'good' qualities are trapped inside him and only his worse qualities manifest in the waking world)

.Good endings can vary in 'goodness'. He can be the hero that saves the spawn or a bounty hunter or even go on a solo quest

All this to say, they both have the capacity to be evil. Regardless of truma or brain washing they can both be bad people once free. Both are brain washed and have memory loss. Both did bad things in the service of someone else. Both have truma that dosnt excuse bad behaviour. Both live in a violent universe unlike our own where death and murder don't mean the sane thing abs have different consequences and should not be judged as real people. Arguably Shadowheart has more autonomy and reasonable decision making begging to bad ending. Astarion hands down has the better chance for redemption by helping others if the player chooses. In game and before development, who loves violence more? Astarion. Who does more violence? Shadowheart. Which is worse, idk.

Again, love them both. Toxic queens. I just hold them to an equal standard

[moetartart]

So when was someone gonna tell me that if you romance Astarion and Karlach and have Astarion say he isn't ready at her romance scene, she says it's ok and she just wants to snuggle and then proceeds to give him a forehead kiss and spoon him till they fall asleep? 😭😭😭 Every time I think I'm over this game and ready to start stardew valley it just pulls me back in 😂

[moetartart]

It's so nice to see some actual progress!! Practice, practice, practice 🥰

[moetartart]

Finally time I did a reference sheet since I draw this vamp so often and I'm actually feeling pretty good about it! I feel like my biggest struggle is rendering which was the main aim of this study. I'm terrible with lighting and blending, but I'm practicing all the time to try and find my own style and way of doing things 😊 I'll probably do a couple more of these because it was such a fun excersise <3

[moetartart]

Sickly sweet fluff because these boys are cute! 🥺 Is this ship all my page revolves around now? A bit. I swear I'm working on some stuff with other characters 😂

[moetartart]

Another little Wyll study <3 Alternative devil form and long hair versions of course because Wyll with long hair has me giggling and kicking my feet

I still feel like I'm missing something in my shading but I can't figure out what it is! Mabey I'm thinking to much idk 😭😭😭

[moetartart]

Wyll with long hair and alternative devil form mods is just everything 😭❤️

Wyll just makes me giddy

[moetartart]

'Don't touch me.'

I'm still not where I want to be but I can't stress enough how much better my love for this game has made my art and lit my spark again so I'm actually enjoying myself 😭

Still considering this a WIP because I think the contrast could be better. Can you imagine accidentally combining your line work and colour layer?? Can you just imagine?? Who would do that?

[moetartart]

STAY SAFE!! [ID: the Gilbert Baker pride flag with the words “Happy pride to all those who are unable to celebrate openly and safely. You are loved and seen!” in all-caps black text over it. /end ID]

[moetartart]

Thank you @figjamplay and everyone who got me to 250 reblogs!

I definitely wanted to give him the biggest hug in that moment 😭

I'm loving this couple and slowly but surely I actually think I'm improving and developing a style!! 😊🙏 I actually like this one sooo much better than my last! Just need to keep at it and not give up!!

[moetartart]

Thank you to everyone who got me to 1000 likes!

[moetartart]

WIP I'm working on <3

[moetartart]

I definitely wanted to give him the biggest hug in that moment 😭

I'm loving this couple and slowly but surely I actually think I'm improving and developing a style!! 😊🙏 I actually like this one sooo much better than my last! Just need to keep at it and not give up!!

[moetartart]

Wyll 'My cheeks have gone warm. Am I blushing?? I must be blushing.'

Astarion 'My little treat, with his cheeks all flushed 😈'

[moetartart]

I wonna see Karlach and Halsin arm wrestle. That is all.