mochizuki-universe-blog

[mochizuki-universe-blog]

Worst Christmas ever...

Christmas Eve and I cried all day. My eyes hurt ans my head... My heart too.... Why today of all days...

[mochizuki-universe-blog]

Late @ night or early day?

I cut my hair & i like it. My Birthday is over and for about 2 weeks everything seemed fine, but now again...

Everything is back and it hit me even harder now...

With round about 16 i was a mobbing victim and everyone (even teachers) said that it was nothing and I'm kind of overreacting. But i had my (few) friends by my side and i was "fine" (even though it's only now/after a few years that i can see it like this)

At the beginning of my 20. i started to work and even though I haded my job and people still badmouthed me, i felt like that my life only starts now and that i would see the world. At this time i was kinda happy with myself.

And now... At the beginning of my 30. (Yes,fuck... I'm this old)... I feel old and depressed. I don't even have a driving licence.... Not really seen much of the world, Not married or even close to...my place's a mess. I hate my current Job. Doing everything... All tasks my Chef should and getting so less money... It's simply unfair. This is really the unhappiest time in my life... So far

[mochizuki-universe-blog]

I know that feeling

[mochizuki-universe-blog]

Always me

Why is it always me being there for everybody and when I need one there´s nobody? And all the people call themselfs friends...

[mochizuki-universe-blog]

The beginning

First of all... Sorry for my bad english, but I haven't really used it in a while.

I'm really not sure what I hope from all this, but to be honest... I'm kind of lonely. Lately I think that I'm old and live my Life without any meaning and friends... It's not Like i stay at home all the time, but all of my old friends droped me after our lives seperated. I tried to stay in touch, but nearly all of them soon Had other things to die. And i think all will stop chasing people If You are always the one to write or to call.

So yeah, friends to find and to keep are two things, but being all alone (accept my Family), having no Boyfriend and an upcomming Birthday... I'm kind of depressed and lonely and started to hate myself. Not much sleep and all this stuff... Some of you may know.

Well... I know that many may think now " Not another Blog Like this" but i write this more for me than for You (sorry) but i still hope that maybe... Maybe there will be some good reactions and not only hate.

Oh... And I'm really new to all this stuff

Bye Bye