Welcome, acolytes! You are in the online presence of a true genius. I understand you may be feeling some shock and awe, and I wish to assure you that this is entirely normal. RP/Ask Blog for Edward Nygma, aka The Riddler. Heavily influenced by Batman: Arkham Knight. Mun and muse both over 25. Mildly Selective. Worshipped by Spooper.
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thcrnchild-archive:
THIS GOT THE SMALL MAN SHAKING. “No, really– I didn’t mean to do it! I can’t control it– it… it’s still my fault, but that doesn’t mean it was intentional!”
Blatantly stupid. Bluntly honest, Completely aware of it– that was Fabien LaFayette in a nutshell. He couldn’t bring himself to tell a lie, as he feared it’d only lead to punishment and agony, so he wasn’t trying to play innocent at all when he said he never intended his crime.
“Y-YOU… YOU’RE A MONSTER, aren’t you? You’re just a criminal! You like hurting people, if anyone’s putting on an act its you! I hurt people but at least I don’t like it when I do it!”
“A criminal?” He actually laughed-- threw his head back and laughed at the other. “You think I, the Riddler, would allow people to refer to me as a common criminal? Oh, you really are an idiot, aren’t you?”
His expression was somber once more when his eyes met the stranger’s once again. “I don’t hurt people. I provide them with ever-important mental stimulation to keep their small, simple minds functioning. If they hurt themselves because they were too stupid to figure it out on their own, that’s hardly my fault, now is it?”
#omg i thought i had replied to this already i'm so sorry#thcrnchild#if you want to drop this and start over that's fine just let me know i know it's been forever
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hellherekitty:
There was a part of her that was instantly mortified by what just happened. She couldn’t believe she’d accidentally grabbed his… Well, of course she’d apologized, but, the instant he began speaking, that meek part of her gave way to the part that was disgusted in him.
Selina didn’t miss the egotistical way he ran a hand through his hair. Oh, she knew his type. He had money, looks, and an ego bigger than his dick. Blue eyes glared at him for just a moment before she turned her lips up at the corners into a smirk.
“How sweet. I’m sure you have women fawning over you all the time, hm?” She steps closer to him, hips swaying. “Probably trampling over their sex driven little tails just to get close to you.”
She moves right up on him, batting her eyes up at him. Her hand moves slowly, hovering near him again, but reaching just past him to grab a cart. “I’ve got all I need right here. Sorry to burst your little hormone fueled fantasy.”
Oh, he knew her type. She played the part well-- cold, hard bitch. Eddie knew more than a few of those, and unfortunately, he had run into more or less all of them in similar ways.
Sometimes, he wondered if it might be him.
But no, that couldn’t be. What woman wouldn’t want him?
“Oh, you needn’t worry about my hormones, my dear... I assure you they’re just fine.” He paused. “Now, yours on the other hand....” He leaned in a little closer. Two could play at her game, and if she had the nerve to cop an attitude with him, then that was just what he was going to do. “I think you can get a few things to help you with your hormones down aisle thirteen. Second shelf from the top, left hand side, ten feet in.”
Nerds In Gotham - Selina and Edward
#hellherekitty#Eddie did u just.... did u just use your PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY to tell her where the tampons are?
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//also, if y’all aren’t following my Scarecrow blog, you probably should be. Just saying.
#spooper knows how to meticulously structure a good time!- OOC#i will probably be spending most of my time there as he's an easier muse for me to write#but i have definitely not forgotten about eddie#mostly bc he won't let me but still
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me: someday i’ll do all the replies i owe, answer all my asks, and completely clear out drafts
also me:
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//hey all. sorry i haven’t made an IC post in forever. I started a new job about 3 weeks ago which changed my sleep schedule pretty drastically-- I’ve worked second shift for about the last five years, and this job is a regular 9-6 office gig. I thought I would adjust to the schedule change faster than I have, probably because I also haven’t had my antidepressants for about two months now bc I didn’t have health insurance to go get them.
I think I’m finally adjusting, and should be able to start making more regular appearances here, and especially on my Scarecrow blog which still needs built. Expect to see actual content from me tomorrow or Saturday, and if anyone wants to drop a thread and/or start a new one, please let me know.
XOXO,
Spooper
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—munday fact sheet
NAME: Spooper. NICKNAME: None. SEX/GENDER: Cis female. PRONOUNS: She/her. EYES/HAIR: Brown / brunette (currently dyed black). HEIGHT/WEIGHT: 5′6″ / a number larger than two. BUILD: curvy chonk TATTOOS: A black and red feather and the words “Chase the Morning” on my left foot, and Rorschach’s calling card and the words “Nothing is hopeless. Not while there’s life.” on the inside of my right arm (written in the font from the comic) SCARS: A few. Two small ones on my collarbones where I had dermal anchors, one on my nose where I had a birthmark removed, a few on my hands from my old job that I’m hoping will fade. PIERCINGS: Both my earlobes are pierced twice, and I have my cartilage pierced in both ears. I also have my nose pierced. I previously had my philtrum pierced (put a silicone spacer in for my last job and it tried to embed), and dermal anchors in my collarbones. MYERS-BRIGGS: INFP-T; The Mediator
Mediator personalities are true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better. While they may be perceived as calm, reserved, or even shy, Mediators have an inner flame and passion that can truly shine. Comprising just 4% of the population, the risk of feeling misunderstood is unfortunately high for the Mediator personality type – but when they find like-minded people to spend their time with, the harmony they feel will be a fountain of joy and inspiration.
Being a part of the Diplomat Role group, Mediators are guided by their principles, rather than by logic (Analysts), excitement (Explorers), or practicality (Sentinels). When deciding how to move forward, they will look to honor, beauty, morality and virtue – Mediators are led by the purity of their intent, not rewards and punishments. People who share the Mediator personality type are proud of this quality, and rightly so, but not everyone understands the drive behind these feelings, and it can lead to isolation.
All that is gold does not glitter; not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither; deep roots are not reached by the frost. -JRR Tolkien
ENNEAGRAM: Results inconclusive. Most likely a Type 6.
ALIGNMENT: Lawful Neutral
TEMPERAMENT: Melancholic
Your temperament is melancholic. The melancholic temperament is fundamentally introverted and thoughtful. Melancholic people often were perceived as very (or overly) pondering and considerate, getting rather worried when they could not be on time for events. Melancholics can be highly creative in activities such as poetry and art - and can become preoccupied with the tragedy and cruelty in the world. Often they are perfectionists. They are self-reliant and independent; one negative part of being a melancholic is that they can get so involved in what they are doing they forget to think of others.
KINSEY SCALE: 3.
Equally attracted to both male and female.
ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Demiromantic. SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Pansexual. IQ: 133. OCCUPATION: Member support for a global standards agency. RELIGION: Atheist. PETS: Two cats (Bowie and Mr Noodle), two guinea pigs (Harvey and Poe), two rabbits (Luna and Vados), three hamsters (Jack, Harley, and Selina), a gerbil (Gerbert), and a betta fish (Adrian). MEDICAL: Anemia, plantar fasciitis, idiopathic intercranial hypertension. NEUROLOGICAL: Depression & anxiety. ETHNICITY/RACE: Caucasian mutt. (English, German, Italian, Eastern European, Irish.....) HOBBIES: Music, reading, writing, crochet. INTERESTS: Crafts/DIY, medical (esp. psychology), animals, food, special education/adaptive and assistive tech, comics, old books, nerd stuff BLOGS: @bxrbossa @cxmedienne, @timoremdei, @noordinaryperson,(And some old blogs-- @banethebatbreaker, @thehomicidalartist, @mannauseis-blog, @drcraneisin-blog, @thevargohoat, @fuckyeahilynpayne, @everchanginginkblot.... there have been more but i can’t remember them) SOCIAL MEDIA: I have an Instagram and a Twitter. Discord is available to mutuals if you ask, but I probably won’t give out my actual social media unless we’ve known each other a while. Tagged by: @amazongoddcss Tagging: @thcrnchild, @sixfootbat, and whoever else wants to do it!
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// current mood: making bad decisions
#spooper knows how to meticulously structure a good time!- OOC#so that blog is still heavily under construction#but i love scarecrow so much i couldn't help myself i need to play him
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‘ fine , i guess you’re gonna miss the … panty raid. ‘
Art thou feeling it now, Mr. Krabs?
“And what makes you think you could persuade me to take part in something so childish and altogether inappropriate as that? I expected something better from someone who refers to herself as a Wonder Woman.”
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‘ this is not your average , everyday darkness. this is … advanced darkness. ‘
I can’t *pbbbt* undertand *pbbbbt* your accent.
He glanced sideways at the stranger, one brow quirking ever-so-slightly.
“Is it now? And I suppose you have some sort of qualification that enables you to designate this advanced darkness as opposed to the regular rotation of the earth away from the sun?”
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‘ can i be excused for the rest of my life? ‘
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SPONGEBOBBBBBBBB.... SQUAAAREPAAAAAAAAANTS!
He made a soft tut, grinning at the reporter. “Now, now, Mister Knox... That isn’t how this game works.” He leaned in closer, shifting his weight and his grip on his question-mark staff. “I need you to stay here and be bait for the big, mean Bat. Okay? Can we handle that?”
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‘ the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma. ‘
Spongebob meme-- You know what? Just... Keep sending me Spongebob quotes. Everyone. Please.
He had to actually pause. Had... Had he just used a word that was more than three syllables? Word on the street was that this guy was a complete moron.
“Where on Earth did you learn to say that? I thought they couldn’t teach old dogs new tricks.”
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‘ FIRMLY GRASP IT! ‘
Spongebob meme-- Still accepting!
“You don’t need to yell!” It was defensive, and definitely not a reaction befitting someone of his IQ, but he chose to move on rather than try to backtrack.
“I will hold my staff in whichever way I choose to. If you don’t like it, perhaps you should get one of your own.”
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‘ goodbye , everyone. i’ll remember you all in therapy! ‘
Spongebob meme– still accepting!
He couldn’t help but chuckle. “A little dramatic, don’t you think? They’ll drop you back off here in an hour, don’t worry.”
He went back to building a house of cards, watching them wheel the newbie away.
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thcrnchild:
// RIDDLER //
SPIT IT OUT? THEY’D ALWAYS JUST INJECTED the stuff into him– not even giving him a chance, though he’d been mostly well-behaved so they’d let him go with less-frequent doses. As long as he was too exhausted to let his fear get the best of them, Fabien was rather obedient– he listened to the guards, he didn’t fight, he didn’t complain. He was overall quiet. It was only when he got scared, though– that he changed completely. He’d thrash about in his restraints, sob, cry scream… he’d need to be placed in a padded room to prevent him from bashing his head open.
���N…. NO MONSIEUR… IM AFRAID I’M AN IDIOT. And I never tried, to burn things.. I just do.” Intellectual? He’d laugh if he found it funny instead of sad, that he was so impaired that he couldn’t even read nor write– and what was there to do in the rec room besides something like that, or a puzzle, or a strategic board game? His low IQ was part of the reason he’d been admitted in the first place.
DID HE FIND ARKHAM DREADFUL? ABSOLUTELY. Spent the first few days in his cell screaming his lungs out until he couldn’t stay awake any longer. He’d tired himself out fairly quickly, leading to quick submission.
He didn’t mean to laugh.
He really, truly didn’t. But it was so blunt, so unassuming, so unbelievably, unbearably honest, that if truth be told it caught him off guard. It was rare to find someone so painstakingly aware of their own lack of intelligence... Perhaps he would make a suitable henchman. It would try his patience, that was certain, but... You could never have too many friends in a place like Gotham... Or even Arkham Asylum.
“You don’t try to burn things? Of course you don’t. I don’t try to rob museums and jewelers of their most precious pieces either.” He gave the other a conspiratorial wink. “We’re all innocent, aren’t we? Just trying to make a living in a dog eat dog world.”
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@imbicilite/ @thcrnchild
cont’d from here
A heavy sigh and roll of the eyes met the smaller man’s statement as the Riddler closed the magazine he had been reading. It was an old issue of Popular Mechanics, one he had read many times before during his previous incarcerations, but it was at least something to do.
“I’m well aware they won’t let you leave. That is how a prison works.” He took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. Keep the voice level, Nygma. He can’t help it he’s a buffoon. It is your job to enlighten him, show him the marvels of the intelligent world.
“Perhaps we can just try to find... A shared interest to discuss. Something that’s not... Moronic.”
#imbicilite#thcrnchild#v: Arkham Asylum#you can continue this on either blog if you feel like continuing it#also sorry i'm slow
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spongebob squarepants sentence starters
change around as you see fit!
‘ oh brother , this guy STINKS! ‘
‘ my leg! ‘
‘ chocolate? CHOCOLATE! ‘
‘ the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma. ‘
‘ i’m ugly and i’m proud. ‘
‘ fine , i guess you’re gonna miss the … panty raid. ‘
‘ do you smell that? that smell. a kind of smelly smell. the smelly smell that smells … smelly. ‘
‘ don’t you have to be stupid somewhere else? ‘
‘ can i be excused for the rest of my life? ‘
‘ goodbye , everyone. i’ll remember you all in therapy! ‘
‘ firmly grasp it in your hand. ‘
‘ FIRMLY GRASP IT! ‘
‘ well , it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret , thereby , secretly adding another secret to their secret collection of secrets , secretly. ‘
‘ come on. you know , i wumbo , you wumbo, he / she / me wumbo. wombology , the study of wumbo! it’s first grade , _____! ‘
‘ just get outta here you stupid , dumb animal! ‘
‘ we don’t need television. not as long as we have our imagination. ‘
‘ you just can’t wait for me to die , can you? ‘
‘ this is a load of barnacles … ‘
‘ this is not your average , everyday darkness. this is … advanced darkness. ‘
‘ i’m not just ready , i’m ready freddy. ‘
‘ i’ll have you know i stubbed my toe last week and only cried for 20 minutes. ‘
‘ ravioli , ravioli , give me to formuoli. ‘
‘ too bad that didn’t kill me. ‘
‘ well it may be stupid , but it’s also dumb. ‘
‘ quick , _____ , without think: if you could have anything right now what would it be? ‘
‘ we’ve been smeckledorfed! ‘
‘ oh well , i guess i’m not wearing any pants today. ‘
‘ umm , i got it. lets get naked! ‘
‘ a five letter word for happiness … money! ‘
‘ woo! shake it! shake it! yeah! shake that bubble butt! ‘
‘ _____! your genius is showing! “
“ you’re nothing but pure evil! just like newspaper comics! ‘
‘ liar , liar , plants for hire! ‘
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//yo. sorry i disappeared for a whole ass week. this was my last week at my old job before i start my new one monday, and on top of that, my girlfriend J has a kidney stone, so I’ve had to take her for x-rays, urologist visits, CT scans, all that fun stuff.
I’ll try to be on later to do replies, for now I need a coffee.
#spooper knows how to meticulously structure a good time!- OOC#ps you should follow her i linked to three of her blogs
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