melodicmoonbeams

[melodicmoonbeams]

Zedaphstropod was not an unwelcome guest at Zed's base by any means. The little guy had proven incredibly helpful for redstone, company, but mostly science experiments.

'Alright, friend,' Zedaph called from the end of the maze he was sending his snail through. 'You are to start your journey in three... Two... Oh my goodness you're an excited little snail!' Zedaph laughed as Zedaphstropod started heading through the maze, happily cutting around corners to reach Zed. And, by all accounts, taking the intended route.

Until, with an excited whoop, Zedaphstropod burst through the glass ceiling and into Zedaph's face.

Zedaph was slain by Zedaphstropod.

'xB! xB! Sweetface come quick I have a snail!' Keralis exclaimed as xB landed in his base. He grabbed his friend's hand, pulling him along. With a giggle, xB followed.

'A snail? What kind of snail?'

'A Papa K snail! With a huge shocked face and big, beautiful eyes! You need to see him!'

The two continued through Keralis's palm tree forest, all the way to the yacht. Where a certain shocked snail was creeping towards them.

'See? My snail! Look into his eyes and tell me he's not the most adorable snail in Hermitcraft!' Keralis crouched down to the snail's height, waving him over. 'Papa Snail! Papa Snail! Come to Keralis!' The snail obeyed. 'Look, xB! He loves me! He wants to be with his favourite Papa K and no, Papa Snail! Not in the water! You have so much to live for!' Keralis coughed, choking as his poor, poor snail drowned. xB dove into the water, trying to grab it and bring him to safety.

Keralis drowned

'Keralis?!' xB swam up to the surface, tail keeping him afloat as he looked out at where his friend now definitely wasn't. 'Did the snail kill you? Did you drown with him?'

'RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!' Startled by Hypno's yell, xB yelped, turning to see him already far in the distance. But a black shelled snail with fluffy blond hair and a black bandanna was zooming along the shore in his place. xB only giggled more, realising.

xBcrafted: anyone seen my snail anywhere?

xBcrafted: XD

Falsesymmetry: I'm too focused on FalseSlimetry rn!

iJevin: omg my snail's so cute I might DIE

iJevin was slain by SlimeJevin

Tango: could see that coming from a MILE away!

cubfan135: haha me and Scar keeping an eye on snailfan135

DocM77: TF IS THIS THERE'S SLIME ALL OVER MY REDSTONE!!!!

DocM77: WHY IS THERE A SNAIL DOC??

DocM77: IM THE GOAT NOT THE SNAIL

DocM77: WHY HE SO CUTE????

Stressmonster101: OH MY GAWD MY SNAIL'S SO CUUUUTE

Stressmonster101: AAAH AND ISKALL GOT A LITTLE GEEZER WITH A BEARD!

Joehillssays: you're not feeling like you wanna Slime, Nourish, Ambulate, Invertebrate, Live today, Doc?

xBcrafted was slain by xBslimed

Grian: Having fun? :)

GoodTimeWithScar: NO

GoodTimeWithScar: BAD SNAIL

Grian: no eSCARgo here, it's just for the hermits who missed out last time

cubfan135 hit the ground too hard

cubfan135: tip: do not fall off balcony when avoiding snail

GoodTimeWithScar: LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO CUB!

Tango: True… debalconyification is no laughing matter...

Pearlescentmoon: do the hermits have a certain number of lives?

Grian: no, just snails

DocM77 was slain by DocMollusk77

DocM77: WHY

DocM77: WHY IS THERE A BLUE FABRIC SNAIL????

DocM77: WITH PIPECLEAVER GOOGLY EYES

DocM77: WIAT JOE I FOUND YOUR SNAIL

ZombieCleo: Of course Joe got a Muppet snail XD

DocM77: JOE SNAIL JSUF ATE MY DJAMKND ORE!!!!!!

cubfan135: SNAILS ARE ORESNATCHERS CONFIRMED

Xisuma was slain by Xislima

Xisuma: don't try and hug your snail :-(

Stressmonster101: NOOOO

Iskall85: Why is there snail?

Iskall85 was slain by Iskshell85

Iskall85: why can't I murder it?

Iskall85: snail faulty isn't taking damage

Mumbo: it's not supposed to

Tango: they're evil like that

Tango: hook you in with the cuteification

Tango: then murder your face

xBcrafted: not immortal! Watched Keralis's snail drown

impulseSV: snails will do that.

impulseSV: oh, watch out for the propeller its adorabel

GeminiTay: all you need to do is keep your snail in sight! It's simple!

Skizzleman: SHUT UP GEM

GoodTimeWithScar: YEAH SHUT UP GEM

cubfan135 was slain by snailfan135

GoodTimeWithScar: CUB

cubfan135: I hate snails

DocM77: YES PLEASE DO

GoodTimeWithScar: BURN THE SNAILSSSSS

Skizzleman: BUEN THE SNAILS BURN THE SNAILS

Joehillssays: JOESNAILS HAS REACHED HOLMDELL. I REPEAT: JOESNAILS HAS REACHED HOLMDELL

Joehillssays was slain by Joesnailssays

Pearlescentmoon: AAAWWWW DOC YOUR SNAIL IS SO CUTE!

DocM77: HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT

Welsknight: Just finished the Snail Obstacle Course!

Joehillssays: why congratulations!

Joehillssays: what was it like competing in a mollusk-dominated sport as a human?

Welsknight: *making the Snail Obstacle Course XD

Welsknight was slain by Shellsknight

FalseSymmetry: rip

Joehillssays: Guess Shellsknight didn’t like the idea of being forced through a small maze or series of challenges with no meaningful reward, as though they were little more than a toy or an inanimate science experiment for us easily entertained by

cubfan135: #snailgate

Welsknight: no tripped over snail

Vintagebeef: just lost an argument with my snail. TCG is getting a snail special edition

Vintagebeef was slain by Vintagesnail

Joehillssays: A continuation of our attempted dominance over the gastropods who indeed bear resemblance to oursleves and have skme level of mubuman ibtelligen

Joehillssays was slain by Joesnailssays

ZombieCleo: ah yes, mubuman ibtelligen

Joehillssays: SNAIL WAS COMING HAD TO TYPE FAST

Joehillssays was slain by Joesnailssays

Smallishbeans: snail viewing platform in shopping district. Looks like snail. For non-snail-owning players only

cubfan135: how dare you

cubfan135: #snail gatekeeping

Xisuma: all hermits with snails meet in shopping district for a meeting

Smallishbeans: all hermits without snails meet in Snailbase to watch them running around panicking

Joehillssays: based on how long it took Joesnails to reach me before, I think I'm safe there

Joehillssays was slain by Joesnailssays

Iskall85: you are never safe

Hypnonizd: snails will appear when you least expect them

Hypnotizd was slain by Hypnoslimd

Xisuma: SHOPPING DISTRICT

Xisuma was slain by Xislima

Xisuma was slain by Xislima

Hypnotizd: RUN AWAY

Xisuma was slain by Xislima

cubfan135 was slain by snailfan135

GoodTimeWithScar blew up

cubfan135: don’t put TNT on snails

cubfan135: they dont like that

Welsknight: Shellsknight has completed the obstacle course in record time!

iJevin: isn't he the only snail who’s attempted it?

Welsknight: doesnt mean its not a record

iJevin: i mean fair

iJevin: how do I test SlimeJevin with this?

Etho: RAVAGER RUSH HAS SNAIL UPGRADES! HIGHEST SCORE WITH A SNAIL WINS A SNAIL TROPHY

iJevin: NEVEER MIMD WE HAVE FRIGGER

cubfan135: I AM ON MY WAY

iJevin: NO ME

Xisuma was slain by Xislima

Renthedog: SEND NE ALL THE SNAIL PICS!

Renthedog: (for Martyn entertainment purposes)

Bdoubleo100: just saw Doc runnjng theough mu forest screaming about snails???

Vintagebeef: dont worry about it, he does rhat somerimes.

Bdoubleo100: WIATTHE SNAILS ARE BACK????

ZombieCleo: only non-lifersZombieCleo: which means we get to watch them dying over and over and running and screaming

ZombieCleo: which is brilliant

Xisuma: PLZ COME TO SHOPING DISTRICT ONMY ME AND HYPNO ARE THERE RN

Xisuma: AND GRIAN, EXPLAIN WHAT RHESE SNAILS ARE ANS WHEN RHEY LEAVE?

Grian: well that’s rather simple

Grian: 1: they’re immortal snails that chase you until they boop you and you die

Grian: 2: whenever I feel like it…

Grian: :)

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I’m curious, given the length of time I’ve had my own online moniker:

Please reblog for sample size!

[melodicmoonbeams]

Networking/Knowing A Guy: A Guide

This is the autism website. Now, as an extension of the power of love and friendship, there are few things more useful than Knowing A Guy. Knowing A Guy means you have a support network. Knowing a plumber, or a tax accountant, or just that one dude that's really fucking good at finding the information you need when you're really overwhelmed, can be the difference between being able to pay rent and having a fun party with friends to fix your shit.

How does one end up Knowing A Guy? It's a skill you can develop called Networking and it is one of the foundations of society. Unfortunately making those connections with people is fucking hard and nobody makes a tutorial for it. So, here you go:

The golden rule is you scratch my back and I scratch yours

It is necessary for survival to seek out useful people

Great news! Everyone is useful in some form or fashion - including you! When given the opportunity to learn about someone, do it! Extroversion does not come naturally to some people and that's okay. Just take whatever falls in your lap.

Types of usefulness: trade skills, connections of their own, personality you jive with, pleasant to talk to, niche interest in shared hobby, security - the list is pretty much endless. I know a guy that lives in the metro area - no job, no major hobbies, inoffensively annoying to me personally, kinda ignorant, not attractive to me, but you know what? He knows how the fuck to get around the city by foot. My rural-raised ass APPRECIATES the guide.

Remember important information: general personality, background, skillset, likes and dislikes. You can find this information by making smalltalk about their life. There is no such thing as pointless conversation. (Yes, even the annoying smalltalk)

The more people you know, the higher the likelihood that one of them will be useful in a given situation - or will know someone who is.

It is overwhelming. In a given clique/community/workspace/whatever, there is A Guy Who Knows The Other Guys. This Guy is a shortcut. Find them. They're often elderly, extroverted, a little bit annoying, a secretary or in some otherwise forward-facing position. Look for people that are gossipy/talk about other people a lot but not in negative ways. If they constantly talk shit, they'll talk shit about you too. They're still useful but be careful with the information you share

You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.

You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.*

If you have low self esteem, you're going to feel like you're using people. You're not. That's the devil talking. People like feeling valued and the connections you are making are the threads holding community together. Recognize people for their talents. It's only a problem when you're taking advantage of people

So: don't feel scummy about it. You're an animal. You have to claw out your right to survive and people will respect you more for it.

Luckily mutualism is the name of the game in the animal kingdom. Offer something back. The foundation of a Know A Guy relationship is Mutual Benefit

Sometimes that Mutual Benefit is just spreading news of the The Guy far and wide. My plumber friend is my actual friend and I love her to death, but I'm maintaining our backscratch relationship by pimping out her plumbing business to anyone that'll listen

Food is a good Mutual Benefit. People across cultures for all of human history have bonded over food. I have good success asking people for a favor and then offering to buy them lunch in return **

General compensation is also good. Offer a service in return and always do your best to offer financial compensation as appropriate. Having your plumber friend take a look at your drain: doable with a case of beer. Having your plumber friend redo the pipes in your entire house? You need to pay for that.

Being transactional is not necessarily a bad thing. I would advise against keeping an itemized list of things owed, but fish don't seek out cleaner shrimp just because they enjoy their company. Everyone gets something

Unfortunately being extroverted and generally personable is a huge benefit here, but that's the value of the Guy That Knows A Guy. There's someone out there that has consolidated All The Guys so you don't have to be the local expert. Always remember nobody can do everything and you don't need to master every skill

* This is the foundation of a functioning community. I have many acquaintances that I find incredibly annoying. They include doctors, welders, artists, social workers, lawyers, construction crew and random fuckers at the grocery store. I do not hang out with them. I do not have to in order to maintain a civil Know A Guy relationship. I can drop them useful tidbits and fuck right off so I don't have to spend any more time than necessary with them

** People may assume romantic intent. Be prepared for that. I generally denote that it's a friendly/work lunch by calling them bro at some point if they're my age. Otherwise my general demeanor is sufficient to show that I do this with everyone

Source: personal experience, mother's teachings of crime, booth vending and poverty

[melodicmoonbeams]

saw this on twitter and wanted to save it here

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insane that some people are born sooooo talented and I was born with an anxiety disorder

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On Your Feet Once Again - submitted by meowstic-seer-of-the-future

#E39610 #F8BB6D #F7ECEB #533881 #341F74

[melodicmoonbeams]

i dont consider myself a 'fashion guru' by any means but one thing i will say is guys you dont need to know the specific brand an item you like is - you need to know what the item is called. very rarely does a brand matter, but knowing that pair of pants is called 'cargo' vs 'boot cut' or the names of dress styles is going to help you find clothes you like WAAAYYYY faster than brand shopping

[melodicmoonbeams]

reasons.

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the notes are broken 😂

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I HATE how tumblr brings up your old tags as you’re typing a new tag because I really don’t!! Want to remember!!! Some of the things I’ve said on this godforsaken site!!!!

[melodicmoonbeams]

Hello! This is my gift for the @mcythorrorgiftexchange, for @skullhalo! I absolutely loved working on this, and there's a small drabble of this AU under the cut :)

Cold wind brushed through her hair, sweeping them across her face as Pearl stared into the wreckage of the Grimlands. It felt like just yesterday, that she’d been walking through the markets as she waited to meet with Sausage, fWhip, and Gem… But now, there was nothing left but an empty mess.

At least, she hoped that wasn’t the case.

fWhip was here. Gem came here to find him, what felt like days ago. And now, she was here to find her. She stepped over debris, fragments of walls surrounding the castle that had come crumbling down with the force of the explosion, until finally, she stopped.

The castle. Even in its ruined state, it was beautiful. Red tendrils intertwined with what was left of it, twirling up towards the highest tower, rooting in the palace grounds.

This wasn’t the Grimlands any more. Not with the twins missing.

Until one of them wasn’t missing anymore.

“Looking for something, Pearl?”

She spun around, gaze immediately setting on braided red hair, and a playful smile. Pearl ran forwards, not bothering to watch her step as dust flew beneath her steps, but she suddenly stopped herself.

Gem’s eyes were… always red, right?

Of course they were.

Pearl stepped forwards, and Gem smiled wider, wider, wider.

She could almost pretend it was her hands wrapping around her neck, and not crimson vines, thorns digging into her skin.

“Gem,” She breathed, the corners of her lips tugging upwards. “You don’t know how happy I am to see you.”

The wizard laughed, leaning in to pull Pearl close. Her laugh had always sounded high and breathy, like the stars chiming against each other. The rasping quality Pearl heard now was surely a result of… A sickness. “I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“…Where’s fWhip?”

“Occupied. Don’t mind him, though. We can stay here for a bit longer,” She mumbled. “Are you in a rush?”

”I— Yes! We have to leave, Gem, everyone is, and I still haven’t found—“

“I said not to worry about it, Pearl,” She spoke again, harsher, now. Colder. Like the stars were gone, leaving an empty, hollow breath behind.

She stared back, finding only vacant red meeting her eyes, as thorns- hands- vines— wrapped tighter around her throat.

“...Gem?”

And, well, Pearl wasn’t ever really good at pretending.

“What’s wrong, Pearl?” Gem didn’t speak.

She never had.

[melodicmoonbeams]

[melodicmoonbeams]

Tommyinnit is a bard who spams vicious mockery

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Introducing: The Life Series Comment-a-thon

In light of several of the content creators involved mentioning negative comments on Wild Life, Secret Life, and Life Series videos in general, I want to suggest an event that encourages people to leave positive comments on life series videos as well!

The life series has some of the kindest and most supportive people I have ever encountered in fandom, and I think the creative minds behind the series deserve to get some of that love too. There is no starting or finishing day to this event, as the intention is for fans to leave kind comments highlighting what they love about Wild Life and the Life Series in general, over the course of the current season. I have devised a total of eight weekly comment prompts, making an educated guess as to how long the season will be based off previous season, intended to encourage you to leave a comment on at least one video per week.

There is no time limit or minimum word count for comments. Just be kind, be honest, and don’t tear other creators down in the process of trying to build others up (“[X creator] is so overrated, people should be watching you instead”, “you deserved to win so much more than [Y creator]”, etc.). Without further ado, The Life Series Comment-a-thon:

Week 1: comment on at least one video telling the creator that you liked the video!

Week 2: pick a team/alliance, then tell at least one person in that alliance that you are really enjoying the dynamic of their team/them collaborating with the other member(s) of the team.

Week 3: tell a new member or one who skipped one or more seasons (Gem who joined last season, Ren, Mumbo, Lizzie, Skizz, and Bdubs who all either missed or did not originally post their POVs of a season) that you are happy they are on the life series.

Week 4: Most of the creators involved in the life series are male, but we know that those who are not get a larger share of the negative comments. This week pick one of them (Lizzie, Pearl, Gem, and Cleo) and tell them that you enjoy their video/their content/etc!

Week 5: leave a comment on someone’s video mentioning at least one specific thing you enjoyed about their episode/their season.

Week 6: pick a person whose videos you have not yet commented on in this event and leave them a comment saying you look forward to their episodes every week/season.

Week 7: write a short, positive comment (e.g “I loved this episode” , “this was great” , “keep up the good work”) and leave it on every POV you watch this week.

Week 8: leave a comment on someone’s video mentioning at least three specific thing you enjoyed about their episode/their season. Alternatively pick three videos to leave one specific compliment on.

Week 9+: repeat one of the previous week prompts, or better yet combine two or more! You can pick yourself, use an eight-sided die, or a random number generator to decide for you.

I know commenting can be scary and that it can be hard to find the words. At the end of the post, beneath the the read-more cut, I have a list of suggestions for what you can bring up in a comment. Just below this you will also find a list of things you can do to let the content creators know that you love their art that are not commenting!

Other things you can do:

Like ten comments on a lifer’s video

Like every video you watch

Watch a video from one of the less popular content creators (subscriber wise, or within the fandom) on the day it comes out

And most importantly:

Reblog this post and/or repost it to other social media platforms to spread the word of the comment-a-thon!

A list of questions to spark comment ideas:

Did a joke make you laugh?

Did you catch them making a reference to another season, SMP, or piece of media?

Did the creator interact with someone in a way you enjoyed?

What made the interaction stand out?

Did they build something you thought was pretty?

What part did you like best: the shape, the blocks they chose to use, how it ties into their season, or how it ties into the terrain around it?

If they have a new skin, what is your favourite part of it?

Did they use background music in a way you thought was especially fitting? In what way?

Did a change from one scene to the next feel very well-timed, smooth, or narratively fitting?

If you did not notice any scene changes or cuts, can you think of something the creator did to make you feel immersed in the story of the video instead of the video making itself?

What do you hope happens next? (be sure to tell them that whether it happens or not you still look forward to watching the rest of their season)

Did something surprise you?

Did the content creator say or do something that made you have a new idea?

Did you learn something new about minecraft?

[melodicmoonbeams]

So, uh, put that in your headcannon and light the fuse I guess

[melodicmoonbeams]

Fire, Water, Earth and Air had some extra time to spare, so they formed a club, igniting one another's spark for fighting ~

[melodicmoonbeams]

Scarian x OHSHC :)