meganmackieauthor
I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 29 What Race Am I Again?
People poured out of the cavern as smoke boiled out, coughing and hacking for air as they did so. As fast as the cloud of gray smoke rolled through, it blew out, leaving only trails of it coming along the vaulted ceiling of the stone structure, seeking escape. 
Evangeline immediately covered her nose and mouth with the top of her shirt, slipping the cloth out from under the opening of her not quite entirely laced-up cambion. Even then the taste of the smoke was acrid. Like something between burning tire and incense. 
Still, several people were struggling to leave the cave, including a small child with horns. Urgently, Evangeline rushed forward with Hagor right by her side. She scooped up the small child to carry her out, while Hagor went past to rescue an older woman who had become disoriented in the chaos. 
 Sigismund did what a cleric would do, and she started assessing people for damages and judiciously using her limited number of cleric spells on those suffering the worst, which was thankfully only a couple. 
Valerian was nowhere to be seen, though he couldn’t have been far, and Artmond … well his heart was in the right place. 
All of this had that strange veneer of familiarity about it all, but Evangeline realized that since hadn’t burned a Meta point, she hadn’t known it was coming until it happened. It seemed the longer and longer she lived… played… lived this game, the clearer those lines became. She knew she came from another world, but even when she was fully rested, she was having a harder and harder time remembering what her apartment looked like. 
She would have been more worried about it if she didn’t have her hand full in that moment. 
“Is that everyone?” she asked anyone. 
“Yes, I think so,” one of the village’s residents coughed, but another came up beside. 
“No, Harrowheart is still in there. She’s trying to put her forge out!”
That was all Evangeline needed to hear. Grabbing a nearby rag that someone was handing out, she tied it around her face as she rushed in with a couple others to help. 
“What an ass,” she said, but no one heard because of all the chaos. Instantly, she knew what was about to happen, and while there were several ways to solve this situation, she went straight to the one she liked best and thought most efficient. 
“We need water over here!” someone shouted as Evangeline rushed past, ignoring the bucket they tried to thrust at her. 
Instead, she grabbed a bow and quiver of arrows leaning against a wall. Shouldering the quiver on she couldn’t help but giggle as her fingers just knew what to do, notching an arrow, though she had never actually shot one before in her real life. 
Yet, despite that she couldn’t see a damn thing. Well, she could see the forge well enough. It was highlighted with fire, burning on every surface, which included the wooden walls of this lean-to structure someone had created around the forge. Only the floor was stone, which was probably smart, but Evangeline didn’t know much about best practices for forging. Many of the forge’s wares hung from the wood structure, however, and those were pretty ruined. It was what had been dumped into Harrowheart’s forge fire that was causing the chaos. Instead of red flames, blue ones were raging hot and angry. 
Between the smoke and the darkness everywhere that wasn’t the blinding light of the forge fire, she couldn’t see her target, the emergency water that waited above the forge in a leather sort of bin thing. It hit her then that she was in fact still human. Races were a thing in this game, and she hadn’t really thought about it until she realized she didn’t have some of the natural advantages that came with that. 
“What are you doing?” Hagor shouted, his own voice mildly muffled by the rag tied around his face. 
She pointed above the burning forge and the source of all the smoke. “Up there is an emergency water trap, but the trigger to drop it is stuck. We have to hit it with a direct shot, and it will put the fire out!” she shouted amongst all the echoing shouts in the cavern. Hagor looked where she was pointing, his eyes narrowing as he scanned the dark. Then he nodded as his gaze landed on it. 
“Can you hit it?” she asked, offering him the bow and quiver.
“Yes,” he said, as he took the bow and slid out an arrow. He pulled the bowstring to his pointed ear as he lined up his shot. “Menara, I invoke your light,” he said. The tip of the arrow shimmered with diamond-white light and a second later he loosed it.
Knowledge: Religion. He had just invoked a druidic prayer that bestowed the light cantrip and auspices which gave a bonus to hit.
It might have been overkill, but Evangeline saw no reason to not throw everything at this. They would take another long rest before they got into anything else really important. 
Hagor let loose the arrow and it flew leaving a trail of the diamond light behind, like a mini comet from his bow. It hit true, and there was a ropey snap. Then the leather water trap above the floor flopped down, dumping its payload onto the burning forge. Immediately, the flames died, which again, she wasn’t entirely sure if that was scientifically right, but this wasn’t her world, so whatever. 
“Good job,” she said to Hagor and clapped him on the shoulder. 
He offered her a pleased pair of smiling eyes since it was all she could see over his impromptu mask. “How did you know it was there if you couldn’t see it?”
“Meta, of course,” she answered. 
“Well, blessings on your Meta for their timely knowledge,” he said.
“And on your Menara,” she agreed, feeling she needed to return the deity compliment. Though now that she heard it out loud, it wasn’t like Meta was really her “god” or anything. More like her kidnapper, but that was a thought for later. 
And judging by the haunted look that passed over Hagor’s eyes at the mention of his goddess’s name, she had a bunch of other questions she wanted to ask instead.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampier Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 28 Ends in an Explosion
“Calling this place a town is generous,” Valerian noted as they walked through the wooded gate to take in the gathering of people within. 
He wasn’t wrong, but to Evangeline, it was amazing. It looked exactly like it did in the game but real and all around her. Since the village was built in a grotto in the forest, the wooden structures there had been built into the rock walls that emphasized the nature of both. The path went down into a slope, and along each side, a few feet back from the entrance, were a handful of temporary stalls scattered wherever the owners of those stalls felt was the best spot for them. 
“Hail!” a man with rams’ horns greeted, walking over as the small party entered. “My name is Tersel. Welcome, strangers.” He set his hands on his hips and looked over each of them in turn as he spoke. “What brings you all here to our humble village?”
Evangeline automatically stepped forward as their spokesperson, and no one objected. 
“Hail, my name is Evangeline. We’re here to trade a few goods and seek aid,” she said, the pre-written dialogue words coming to her as easily as if she could actually read them herself. It felt a bit strange, but she just went along with the scenario. She had done this part a dozen times before anyway. 
“Yes, I note from your collars you ran afoul of those goblin bands that have been roaming these parts.” He nodded toward hers, his eyes looking at it poignantly. 
“That is the full sum of the story I’m afraid. We all seem to be linked together, I was hoping there would be a blacksmith here who could help us out of this predicament,” she said. 
“Hmm, unfortunately, I know for a fact that the blacksmith Harrowheart won’t be able to remove those collars for you. A few others who escaped the goblin slavers have come through every so often, so it’s not like we haven’t tried.”
Evangeline knew all that, but that wasn’t the point anyway. “That’s fine. We would still like to speak to her at least.”
“Well, you’ll find her down the way in the cavern there. Just keep following the main path around and you’ll find her. Listen for the clanging and swearing.” Tersel grinned, and Evangeline returned it. She knew the character they were about to meet. 
“Well, he was friendly,” Artmond said, glancing back as they moved on. 
“You think everyone is friendly. You’re like a puppy dog looking for pets,” Sigismund muttered. 
“What’s wrong with that? Everyone loves puppy dogs,” Artmond asked. 
“He’s right,” Evangeline agreed, which earned her a sharp eye from Sigismund before she crossed her arms and looked away. “Don’t worry it will be fine, she’s a cinnamon roll.”
Evangeline smiled as she spotted their next destination. 
As they entered the cavern, before turning left to go deeper in to find the blacksmith, she stopped at a small stall where equipment, supplies, and a few weapons were laid out over a horseshoe shape of stone benches. In the center was a clean-shaven dwarf sitting on a stool as he took apart the spikes on a climbing kit, inspecting and repairing the used piece of equipment.
“Hello strangers,” he greeted as they approached. “How can I serve you?”
“We have some equipment we’ve found that we would like to sell off,” Evangeline answered.
With a gesture of her hand, she pulled up her inventory and ran her finger over the little boxes with the various items she intended to sell and they manifested in her hand inside a worn-out-looking travelers pack. 
The dwarf trader didn’t even blink when she did that; he simply set aside the climbing kit he had been cleaning and waited for her to pull out items from the pack, taking them only when she handed them over. 
She knew it didn’t matter what she produced for his inspection, he would buy everything, even the random rocks and bones that sometimes got accidentally picked up. Sure, they only got a copper each for those things, but it was a copper more than they had before. The only thing that was different was she didn’t have a pair of screens to do this trade with. One by one, the party members repeated the process, and the trader kept a count of the amount he would pay for the items. There weren’t very many. The best stuff that they had taken they kept for themselves to use, but soon enough, they had a small pouch of silver and copper coins, enough to get them some supply packs. It was a start. 
While everyone else was unloading, Evangeline looked over his wares, making a mental list of the things she wanted to come back for when they had better funds. Especially a pair of gloves that would up her social interaction checks, which would be very helpful as their party’s leader and spokesperson. They would be running around this village for the next couple of days, if they followed what she knew about the game, so there would be time to buy or trade or pickpocket…
That gave her pause. 
Oh right, she remembered. Pickpocketing is a thing here. And there is an invisibility ring nearby that would make that easier.
She would just need to spend a Meta point to recall exactly where it was. 
While she contemplated that plan, she glanced at the shopkeeper, and a pang of guilt cut through her. It was one thing when he had just been a digital representation of a trader, puppeted by the work of a voice and motion-capture actor. Then it didn’t matter if she stole from anyone. The whole point of their existence was for her to have these things for her to use in the game, acquired by whatever means she chose. But it felt different now that she was looking at the flesh and blood man before her. 
Did he have a life outside of her experience? If these people were in fact real, like if she were in another dimension where what she called a game was their reality, then if she stole from him, would she be ruining his life? Leaving him to starve? What if���?
“You’re thinking too hard about it,” Valerian whispered to her. 
She blinked at the buzz of his voice in her ear. “What? About what?”
“I have no idea, but I can see you’re thinking too hard about it.”
Glancing around, she realized they had finished their sell-off. Artmond received his share of coppers, which he then promptly handed over to Sigismund. 
“What’s next?” he asked cheerfully.
That’s when there was an explosion.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 27 The Day After
Evangeline’s neck ached when she woke up the next morning. It was a general ache, like she wrenched her neck by sleeping funny and it lessened as she moved her head around. Like she found the night before, the skin was unbroken, but a dried layer coated it. When she scratched at it, she found it wasn’t dried blood. It was white if anything. Other than that, she felt fine if a bit … hungover. 
With an additional acute urge to wash off whatever was on her neck, she got up to find out if the rest of the camp was awake. 
“Hey, good morning. We were getting worried,” Hagor called as Evangeline appeared by the central campfire. He looked bright and cheerful after his harrowing night having been eaten by a different kind of vampire and left for dead for a few minutes. 
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little … under the weather.” Glancing around, she didn’t see Valerian anywhere. 
“What do you mean, ‘under the weather’?” Sigismund asked, her eyebrows pursing hard together. She stood up to intensely peer into Evangeline’s eyes. “Did you get bit?”
Adrenaline spiked through Evangeline, and she wasn’t able to hide it. She had in fact been bit, but not by the vampire Sigismund thought. 
Sigismund’s own eyes widened by the involuntary, nonverbal admission, and her hand instantly snapped out toward Evangeline, glowing. 
“Do you have any conditions?” she demanded, flipping into healer mode. 
“I…” Evangeline glanced at her personal menu, noting that the lethargic condition was still there, which explained the hungover feeling. 
“You’re clearly lethargic, but anything else?” Sigismund pressed her warm, glowing hand to Evangeline’s forehead and an immediate feeling of ease melted into her. 
“No, nothing else,” Evangeline reported. She felt no need to speak about the Bleeding condition she had last night. Valerian had taken care of it already anyway. 
“Is she going to be alright?” Artmond asked, anxiety rife in his voice. 
“Yes,” Sigismund intoned, her voice echoing a little with her cleric power. “She was bit by a childer, not a full vampire. He could have enthralled her, but he can’t turn her, so she will be fine, once I…”
Evangeline let out a deep sigh of relief. The lethargic condition faded away from her menu and she at last felt like she had a full night’s sleep. She even stretched deliciously as Sigismund’s light faded. 
“Oh my gosh, thank you. That feels so much better,” she said. 
Sigismund brushed her hands together, though she didn’t seem satisfied with her work. She simply went back to her seat by the fire. 
Hagor greeted her with a warmer smile and held out a bowl of what looked like oatmeal with nuts and berries in it. There wasn’t much in the bowl, maybe four spoonfuls, but it was better than nothing. “It’s not much but we saved you some. It’s the last of the food stores so we’re going to have to fix this situation at some point.” 
“That’s okay,” Evangeline said, taking a seat on the log next to him. “We should probably head to town now, sell off our spoils, and get some proper supplies.” It occurred to her that she would probably be burning off most of her Meta points that day, in order to remember all the small, hidden treasures and interactions they could have that would make the rest of the game… their lives… easier. 
“The most important thing we’re going to need to do is find this blacksmith you were talking about,” Sigismund sniffed. “Once that is done, we should go our separate ways.”
“Though it is interesting,” Artmond added, thoughtfully. “We got proof now that we can go our separate ways if one of us dies. We were able to leave Hagor only after he…”
No one needed him to finish that sentence. 
“Yes, but that only would have worked if we had left him permanently dead, and I don’t feel like dying or killing all of you,” Sigismund stated. 
“Well, isn’t that just swell,” Valerian declared as he sauntered into the group. “She says she’s not going to kill us. Gee, now I feel so safe.”
“Morning Valerian,” Hagor said, as if that would soften the sharp sarcasm dripping from him. He held out another bowl of the same oatmeal to him. 
Valerian took it but wrinkled his nose. “I don’t mean to give offense, but I don’t think I can eat this.”
“Not rich enough for you, rogue?” Sigismund sneered. “You expecting caviar on toast? Maybe a poached egg?”
Valerian shook his head. “No, nothing like that and nothing personal to your cooking, druid. I rarely eat anything in the morning. As you say, my profession keeps me in the shadows, so my cycle of … life is all out of whack.” 
Evangeline cocked an eyebrow at him and wondered if anyone else was hearing the blatant double entendres in his little speech like she clearly was. If they did, no one commented, only shot him sober glances, and Hagor reached out to take the bowl back from him. 
Valerian didn’t relinquish it, however, and pointedly turned toward Evangeline with it. 
“You look peaked this morning. Would you like some more of this glorious concoction?” he asked, airily. 
Evangeline couldn’t help herself. She grinned. 
“Sure, I can take a little more.”
“It’s not a bad idea,” Artmond piped up. “Evangeline got bit by the vampire last night. She woke up lethargic today.”
“I’m alright though,” Evangeline added quickly to stave off any telling reaction from Valerian. “Sigismund has already cleared the condition, and I’m going to be fine.”
“That’s good to hear,” he said, his voice threaded with sincerity, again implying a double meaning that only Evangeline understood. 
It made her cheeks pink up. They exchanged bowls, her empty one for his… not-full one, but more-full-than-empty one. After getting it down, she felt much, much better. 
“Well, what do you say gang? Shall we go to town?”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 26 Bite Me, Vampire Boy
It felt like ice pinching sharply into her neck. Valerian’s teeth broke through her skin, and she gasped. Like an automatic response, his fingers came over her mouth, muting the sound as his back arched, and he drew on the spot. The numbness spread the next moment, making what was happening easier. 
Her head swam as she lay there. To make things more comfortable, she had chosen to lie down on her bedroll. When he had come over her, she wondered if this was a terrible idea, but he didn’t dwell too long before his teeth were on her. 
Fatigue washed over her. Her hit points were draining away into him. At least, they had been wise enough to check her hit point count before attempting this. She had double what she had at the end of their day. As long as he only took six of them, she would be alright. 
She could feel that moment coming with each pull of his mouth. He needed to stop, but she wasn’t sure he showed signs of doing so. A shudder ran through his back. 
“Stop. Stop!” she gasped. 
Her voice cut through. 
He flinched and jerked his mouth away, releasing his teeth so that he didn’t tear her skin. 
“Right, yes,” he muttered, shaking his head as he rolled back onto his toes, rising drunkenly. 
Unable to remain lying, Evangeline did the same with about as much grace. Her head swam a bit as she staggered up.
Gesturing at the air, she called up her personal menu. Two hit points. “That was close,” she muttered. 
“I stopped,” Valerian said defensively. 
“That’s technically true,” she replied. 
“The best kind of true,” he quipped, albeit weakly. His fingers touched his lips, swiping a spot of her blood into his mouth, grinning like an idiot. “I feel better.”
“That’s great; I feel worse,” she muttered, touching her neck to find the spots where his teeth had sunk into her. According to her menu, she had the conditions: bleed and lethargic. She pulled her fingers away from her neck to see them coated in blood. “Dammit.”
“Come here,” Valerian whispered, tucking in closer to her one more time, but this time she pressed a hand against his chest.
“No. No more.” Her legs nearly gave out underneath in the effort. 
“I won’t take anymore, I promise,” he said sweetly, bracing her with his hands, and she realized in her weakened state that there would be very little she could have done to stop him if he wanted to finish her off. 
“God, this was a stupid thing to do,” she said. 
“Shhhh,” Valerian shushed softly, then his lips wrapped around the wound. Instead of teeth this time, she felt warmth slip from his mouth. His tongue dipped into the wounds and a thread of pleasure washed through her. Evangeline sighed at the relief of it. Through her barely slitted eyes, she saw the blood condition in her menu fade away. She was still lethargic, but that only corrected with a long rest. 
This time, she lost herself in the ecstasy of the talented motions of Valerian’s mouth on the sweet tender spot just below her ear. It was more intense than any other sort of necking she had ever experienced, though even if she were in her right mind, she couldn’t recall a single one in any detail. 
When her moans began to turn to cries, he pulled his mouth away with a final little smack. 
At that point, Evangeline was no longer standing on her own power. She was completely draped over Valerian, his arms around her back and cupping her head bearing it all. 
“Shhh, I got you,” he hushed, and he gently lowered her down back to her bedroll. She let him, wallowing in the floaty sensation of it all as if she were made of air. 
Once she was down, he pulled the connected end of the bedroll up and over her bare feet and legs. Then his fingers slid up to her neck, pulling together the worn leather ties at the top of her peasant’s shirt. He drew them gently together, covering up their deed. Or they would have if she didn’t stop him.
“No, we’ll get blood on my clothes…”
“It’s alright, my lady,” Valerian whispered. “There is no blood anymore. See?”
He plucked up her fingers and traced them over her neck. It was slightly damp, and that dampness felt thicker than she expected, but she felt no breaks or tenderness in her skin. When she looked down at her fingers, there was no sign of red. 
“Vampire tricks,” he said, giving her a wink that made her giggle. 
He wrinkled his nose at her reaction, like it hadn’t been the one he had been going for, but finished setting her to rights, then sat back into the shadows once more, until his back hit the trunk of the tree. He settled there, one leg crooked up as he rested his wrist upon it. 
“You’re not leaving to go hunt?” she asked, though it was so hard to keep her eyes open at that point. 
“I’ll stay until you’re asleep,” he said. “Besides, I can’t remember? The collars.”
“That’s a strangely protective gesture,” she mumbled. 
He didn’t respond, or at least, not right away. As she drifted back into sleep, she heard his voice rumble once more. “I told you, you could trust me.”
“I know, Val. I love you,” she muttered. And that was the last thing she remembered before she floated away into peaceful dreams. 
### 
Valerian stared at the strange woman who had dropped into his life only a couple of days ago. He wasn’t sure he understood what he had just heard her say. While he had seduced people that fast before, it didn’t feel to him like that was exactly what was going on. Carefully, considering those three too-easy-to-say words, he decided to not take them seriously. The endorphins that were pumped into a victim were often known to elicit things out of them that they didn’t really mean. At least, that was what he had observed. She had been right. She was the first sentient victim he had ever… Though to call her a victim didn’t seem correct either. Even if what she did was foolish, she had offered it to him of her own free will. 
“I will never forget this,” he whispered to her sleeping form. And he watched over her throughout the night until just before dawn. 
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 25 Vampiric Confessions
“Valerian?” Evangeline flinched as she watched the vampire, this one her ally, peel himself off the trunk of her tree. He was liquid shadow. The few torches of their camp sported to light the area barely touched her where she was sitting on her bedroll, which was what made the willow tree a prime place to sleep. 
A glance at her personal menu told her she had barely gotten any rest. She still only had one tic under her Special Skill, not that it mattered. She was so tired she barely remembered her own name, never mind that she was a woman who had somehow been transported into her favorite video game and was now living in it for real. 
She was mostly sure that was what was happening, though she hadn’t ruled out that she had, in fact, had a brain aneurysm and this was, in fact, some sort of final death hallucination.
Either way, as he stood over her, her heart beat faster in her chest as she felt the strange sense of familiarity tugged. Her last tic beckoned, the need to use it fed by her fear that she really needed to remember what she simply couldn’t recall as the shadow loomed over her. 
“I need your help,” he repeated, his voice a raspy whisper.
“What…” She swallowed and resettled on her seat. “What is it, Val?”
“Don’t call me that,” he growled, dropping down into a crouch next to her. “You know who and what I am. I know you do, so don’t lie to me about it.”
A slice of light coming from between the strands of the willow branches slashed across one of his eyes. He did not look good. He was too pale even for someone who was supposed to be pale, which was saying something. Sweat beaded his forehead, and the intensity in his eyes was emphasized by a near jaundice tinge at the corners. From the gap in his shirt, she could see his amulet swinging.
He leaned in an inch more. “You know.”
Carefully licking her lips, Evangeline weighed her answer carefully. 
“I do,” she said, confirming.
He shifted back an inch, satisfied with her answer. 
“Most of the time,” she added, scooting back an inch with a wiggle of her butt. “Sometimes, I can remember. It’s all as clear as me knowing what your name is right now.”
His eyes narrowed. “And?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know. Sometimes it’s like a dream I can’t quite recall. I just know there is something I should know. I’m not trying to mess with you.” His eyes searched over her face, and she withstood it. 
“So you have no idea…” he hedged, cocking his head to one side, “what I am right now?”
“I know… that when I do remember… I’m not afraid.”
Valerian went completely still, his eyes widening at her declaration. 
She gave him a small smile. “It doesn’t worry me whatever it is. I don’t fear for myself or fear you.”
He growled at that. 
“It’s not that I’m saying you’re weak or something. I just mean, I know you are an ally, and that we can—”
The growl shifted to a groan, and he staggered on his toes, his body curling inward. 
“Val, what’s wrong?” 
He moved back even more, going back to the trunk of the tree. She stood to follow.
“Stay back. Never mind,” he growled and groaned. 
“Valerian, just tell me what it is. What do you need? Did you get too badly hurt with the fight? Do you have a condition? Should I go get Sigismund?” She leapt to her feet and turned to do exactly what she said. 
Valerian grabbed her from behind. A hand slapped over her mouth to muffle her involuntary squeal. His mouth pressed to her ear. “No, don’t!” 
In response, she jerked her elbows into his solar plexus. He didn’t let go immediately, but he grunted. “Please, don’t involve the others. I can’t… I can’t risk it.” Then he deliberately let her go, but he didn’t move back. She could hear his breath in her ear. It sent a shiver down her spine. 
“What is wrong with you?” she asked. 
“I can’t… tell you…” 
She reached back behind her, slipping her fingers around his wrist. 
“I think… I’ve been thinking that… whatever this gift this weird little god Meta has given me, if I don’t learn something for myself here, I can’t remember it when my points are gone. Which means, I think, if you tell me, the way you’re supposed to, then I will always know it. And then I will be able to help you. And I will. I’ll help you.”
“Why?” he breathed, the sound full of fear that tugged at her heart, and she just couldn’t remember why.
“What an ass,” she said, voicelessly. 
The last Meta point burned away. 
“You need blood,” she said, finally remembering. Understanding. “You took a full blast of radiant damage, even though I told you to stay back, and now you can’t heal even if you do a full long rest. And you can’t go out and hunt blood either to clear your condition. The collars will stop you. You need help.”
“I won’t hurt you. You can trust me. You can,” he insisted. Begged.
“That’s not true,” she said, shaking her head. “There’s a real risk that you’ll lose control. This will be the first time you’ve ever drunk blood from a thinking creature. You could kill me. Granted, we have the phoenix now, and you can bring me back, but I would rather not experience that because, now that I have to actually do this, I’m real hesitant.” She laughed dryly, but it died almost as soon as she started. 
A long silence stretched between them, her neither letting go nor him pulling away or moving closer. 
“You can trust me,” he repeated. “Not a drop more than I need.”
 “Fine. Only on one condition.”
“Name it.”
“When I forget again, you will tell me your secret, so I will never forget it again.”
Another long pause stretched. 
“I’m a vampire.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 24 New Camp Feature
“Guys! You’re alright!” Hagor called as they all piled through the entrance to camp. 
“Hagor!” Evangeline called, more relieved than she had ever been when playing the game. She rushed across the space and jumped into Hagor’s arms, giving him a joyful hug. “You’re not dead!”
“I am as surprised as you are!” he said, hug her back solid and hard before setting her back on her feet. 
Artmond approached next, grinning like a fool as he shook Hagor’s hand vigorously. “Well met, sir! Well met!”
Sigismund nodded, her hands tucked into the sleeves of robe. 
Only Valerian ignored Hagor completely, spinning in place throwing his gaze around. “Where is the phoenix?” he demanded. 
“Why it…” Hagor turned to indicate it, only to pull up short himself, confused. “It was just here. 
“What about the necromancer and his horde?” Sigismund added. 
Hagor indicated a small pile of ash next to him. “The phoenix had done this before it… woke me up.”
“And I will do it again, son of the forest,” the phoenix’s voice reverberated in all of their minds. “And I will do the same for all of you.”
Strangely, even though the sound was telepathically expressed, Evangeline still got a sense of direction from the sound. Turning with the rest of her party, they noted the phoenix sitting on a log a few feet away regarding them with regal patience. 
Sigismund couldn’t help herself; she dropped to the ground into a kneeling position, holding her hands up in a pose of supplication before them. Artmond also knelt a second later, but his took a more lordly kneel as if before a royal personage.
Knowledge: Arcana. Fail.
Knowledge: Nature. Success.
Phoenixes, were considered the noblest and most sacred of animals. 
Knowledge: Religion. Success.
Some regarded them as messengers of the gods, and others as gods themselves.
"What do you mean?" Valerian demanded, crossing his arms, clearly not feeling reverent or trusting. 
"It is my destiny to travel with you and be your shield against death," they said. 
"Resurrections. Just before we're on the brink of death, they can summon us back," Evangeline explained. It was the games respawn system, so that death wasn't permanent. Inconvenient, but not permanent, reviving the players character companions if they fell in battle. Evangeline didn't feel like she could or should really say any of that. There was something in the way the phoenix regarded her that encouraged her to keep quiet. 
"So you'll just follow us wherever we go and keep us from keeling over?" Valerian questioned harshly, then completely shifted with a wry smile. "Because I'm totally fine with that."
"There are limitations," the phoenix continued as if they hadn't been interrupted. "The request must be made by one of you, sincerely. You must truly wish for their return. My powers can only be extended to you five and those you grant access to this camp by way of the First One's decree."
"Why such a limitation?" Artmond asked, with all his usual guilelessness. 
"My power is not without limits, and I am now bound to you who have freed me from my prison. Such is the conditions of my release."
"Who is the First One?" Hagor asked. 
"You are," Evangeline said, "You're the first one they resurrected back from permanent death."
"No, child of the day. You are," the phoenix corrected. 
Stunned, they all stood there staring at Evangeline. 
"But... this is not my sanctuary, it's Hagor's," she argued. 
"It is your camp, wherever you are and that is where I will remain."
Evangeline understood, or thought she did, what they were saying. She had one Meta point left and she knew that this was a game. She was the player character. Everything in this game revolved around her.
Suddenly, she felt small, all the lesser feelings she had escape slipping into this living fantasy she had been enjoying. And she genuinely had been. Now she just wanted to sink into the ground and disappear beneath the heavy stares, it was like they could see the truth. That she was really a pathetic, ugly, overweight loser who had failed at life and hid that fact inside her video games. They knew the truth…
“Well, this has all been fun, but I’m beat, and I tired of looking at all of your faces,” Valerian declared, spinning in place to march off. His declaration broke the spell on them all. 
“There are other conditions,” the phoenix added, matter of fact. 
“Please, ignore him, Great One,” Sigismund said, shooting daggers at Valerian’s uncaring back. 
“Each time I bring you back, it will cost me one of my feathers. If you should be so careless as to die so frequently that I use them all, I will be reborn, and my boons will go with me.”
Now that surprised Evangeline. That wasn’t how it was in the game. 
“I also need a jewel per person that represents you. That is all,” the Phoenix concluded. 
That part was in the game. It was a quest actually, to find everyone’s representative jewels. 
“We understand, thank you, Lord Phoenix,” Sigismund said, bowing her head once more. The Phoenix seemed satisfied, fluffing their feathers, then tucking their head under one of them. The act dimmed their light, returning the camp to a sleepy twilight. 
“But why does they need jewels to resurrect us?” Hagor asked, shifting uncomfortably. 
“Don’t worry, you don’t owe them anything,” Evangeline assured, touching his arm. “The first one is free. But phoenixes like jewels, they make nests out of them, so whenever we find some we should just bring them to her any way.”
“Why?” Artmond asked. 
“It’ll keep her happy. Now, I think I’m going to follow Valerian’s example and get some sleep,” she said, and turned to head to her willow tree. She really was exhausted. 
This whole thing can’t be a dream then if I’m this bone tired. You can’t be exhausted in dreams, right? she thought to herself. 
To her relief, her bedroll was where she had left it. Slipping into it, she thought for a moment that she might have had trouble dropping back to sleep after the late-night attack and subsequent excitement. Yet, when she looked through the branches of her tree, she saw the soft nightglow of the phoenix, protecting them. The urge to remember something more about the phoenix tickled her again, but she had only the last Meta point and she was about to go to sleep. It could wait until later. 
### 
She wasn’t sure what woke her up. No one had touched her, no one had said her name and she felt dragged out of a deep, dreamless abyss. 
But opening her eyes, she saw the form sitting next to her.
It noticed her too. 
“I need your help.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 4 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 23 Let Your Light Shine Down
She mounted up the steps and moved forward until her thighs bumped the edge of the altar. Sure enough, when she laid her hands down on the surface, they found handles of the egg-shaped canister that had waited there for ages for someone to come lift up and free the being within. 
"I'm going to count to five to give you time to get back to the door if you sprint, and then I'm going to open this," she said to Valerian. 
He didn’t respond. 
Concerned, she turned, peering through the dark, trying to detect if he still stood there. “Valerian?” 
Still no response. 
“Hey! Valerian?” she shouted louder.
Still nothing. Maybe he was being a pissy little boy.
“Sigismund? Artmond? Did Valerian come back to the door?”
They didn’t answer either. 
That sent skitters up and down her arms. In fact, her voice didn’t seem to carry very far at all. 
Knowledge: Arcana. Failed. 
She wasn’t sure what that meant, if anything, so she refocused on simply finishing this task. They didn’t have a whole lot of time, she was sure, before the necromancer escaped the Tangle Vines and came after them here. 
True to her word, she started counting down. “5…4…3…2…1!” she shouted, then lifted up with all her might. 
Strength check. Passed. 
The heavy lid lifted up. As she expected, bright, blinding light burst from the seam and flood over her like a tidal wave of force. 
She found herself flying back, but it wasn’t from the wave of magic. Valerian jetted forward, having been the one to throw her off her feet, only to be met a second later by the real force of magic. He cried out as it swamped over him, knocking him so he fell to the ground next to Evangeline. His skin was blistered red, like he had a severe sunburn. 
Evangeline blinked, realizing she could see that clearly, before looking up. 
Rising out of the egg-shaped canister, light moving as if made of liquid, flowed up. It contorted back and forth, bubbling and weaving itself into wonderful image of a bird with a long swan-like neck, raptor head and wings bold and strong as the eagle. It’s tail trailed below it out of the cannister like the fan of a peacock made of lava like motes, flaring as it twisted and twitched. A triumphant call roared out from its beak that no one could mistake its meaning. 
Free at last! Free at last!
All around them the light blew away Valerian’s cloud of darkness, Evangeline connecting up it as the reason she hadn’t been able to see or hear anything behind her. She had missed the obvious tell, even as it no longer mattered since the phoenix’s magic had destroyed it.
The phoenix flapped it wings a few more times, then settled down to land on the table, settling its wings in the process. Even in the dark, it continued to glow warmly as a campfire. 
“Thank you, child of the day and child of the night, for free me,” they said, though the words seemed to echo in Evangeline’s mind. It regarded both of them quietly, waiting for a reply to its greeting. 
Evangeline and Valerian looked at each other in astonishment. Evangeline recovered first. 
“You are welcome!” she said, pushing herself up to standing, though she wavered a moment. Glancing at her stats, she had exactly one hit point left. That was too close, but it was okay now. There would be no more threats from this point on. 
It flapped its wings a moment, then resettled them as it regarded Evangeline. “Yes, you’re very interesting. I would like to join you if you will have me,” they said into her mind. 
“Of course, in fact, we have need of your immediate aid.” 
It cocked its head and then closed its eyes. Immediately, a sensation like the brushing of a wing passed over Evangeline’s face and through her mind, even though the majestic bird in front of her hadn’t moved a muscle. 
“Yes, I see. Very well. I shall meet you at your camp. Follow me there.” And it flapped even more rapidly, throwing itself up into the air and then out blasting a caw and subsequently a hole in the ceiling of the temple. It dashed through and disappeared into the starry sky above. 
With a yelp, Evangeline managed to hop out of the way of the falling ruins by a hair’s breadth. It didn’t deter the overwhelming wonder she felt. “Did you see that? That was amazing!” she cried, turning her emphatic grin to Valerian, who remained on the floor staring up with his own blank face of astonishment. 
Sigismund and Artmond leaned in through the door. 
Evangeline bounced in place, giddily. “Did you guys see that?” 
“Yes!” Artmond shouted, reflecting back the joy she felt. Sigismund took a few steps into the space, staring after with a more awed expression, like she had experienced something for more religious. And in fact, she had. 
“We need to hurry back to camp!” Evangeline grabbed for Valerian’s arm, to help leverage him back to his feet. He accepted it, more because he was too shocked to resist or be indignant. 
“But is it safe now?” Artmond asked. 
“Yes, but we gotta hurry. We’re too weak to get into any more trouble,” she explained, only realize that Valerian hadn’t followed her to the exit. He still stood staring up at the ceiling. 
“Hey! Come on!” she shouted, his hesitation not dimming her excitement. 
“Are you absolutely sure we’re safe now? What about all those skeletons?” Sigismund asked, clearly not convinced. 
Evangeline was glad her last Meta point spent covered this information. “The phoenix will go to our camp and destroy the necromancer with their holy fire. Once the necromancer goes down, the skeletons fall apart. Then we can save Hagor.”
“Save Hagor?” Artmond wrinkled his nose at that idea. 
“It is a true phoenix?” Sigismund asked, understanding what Evangeline was saying. 
Evangeline laughed. “Come on. I’ll let them explain themselves.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 6 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 22 Temple Run Pt 2
Evangeline was glad she was right as her party scurried through the emptied ruined temple. The piles of dust of their slain foes, along with some bat corpses and rats that had been thrown in for good measure the day before, still laid where they had dropped. All the doors were open and the treasure boxes and cases empty. At least, she was mostly sure in the semi-dark. She didn’t have darkness vision since she had remained human when she crossed over, but she knew this dungeon so well. It had been worth it to burn a Meta point to not fall onto her face. 
What her memory could not help with was finding the hidden door in the back wall. “Dammit! I know it’s here,” she muttered, running her hands over the stone surface. Her lack of nightvision was giving her a distinct disadvantage to finding it. 
“Evie! Wait! What’s in there?” Sigismund called, the cleric lagging behind, exhausted from having burned out all her mana. It was the price of a partial rest, only recovering half of what you lost the day before. 
“It’s just ahead, in the final boss room!” Evangeline called.
“What are you looking for?” Valerian demanded, his eyes glowing red in the darkness. The sight of them made her flinch, but again, the darkness hid that. Or so she thought, until those red eyes narrowed at her reaction. 
“I’m looking for a hidden door back here. I just can’t…” She continued running her fingers over the wall to the sound of dice rolling of the games random number generator, deciding her ability to pass the skill with all her bonuses added. 
“Here,” Valerian said, and the hidden door slid to the side into an even darker space. 
Evangeline grinned, then looked back at Sigismund and Artmond clinging together behind her. In the faint moonlight coming through the cracked ruined walls, she could see they were both exhausted. 
“Where are your hit points at?” she asked, furrowing her brow. 
Sigismund sneered indignant at that personal question, but Artmond glanced over at his invisible-to-Evangeline stat board. “I got five left,” he said. 
“Crap you can’t come in, just in case this goes south,” Evangeline said, then looked to Sigismund. 
“Three,” she confessed reluctantly.
Evangeline turned to Valerian and his narrowly slitted eyes. “Fifteen,” he said. Despite the wound he had taken in his shoulder, he was mostly at full health. 
“And I’m at full,” Evangeline shared. “So I think the best course of action would be for you two to stay by the door and don’t engage in what happens next. That way we can still reach the altar.”
“What altar?” Sigismund demanded, but Evangeline’s mind was going a million-miles-a-minute as she tried to solve their dilemma. 
“Oh crap,” she said, looking back to Valerian. “Sigismund, you’re out of mana right?” 
“Yes!” the other woman shouted. 
“So you can’t cast resistance against good or evil on him?” She pointed at Valerian, whose eyes got even slittier if that was possible. 
“NO!” Sigismund shouted, her patience well and truly lost. 
“Why does he need protection—” Artmond asked, but Evangeline let him finish. 
“He’s got the ability to see in the dark, so he’s going to have to lead me to the altar in there and then I can do the rest.” Then she reached for the amulet currently hanging outside of Valerian’s shirt, tucking it back in. “Make sure that is touching your skin, and then as soon as you got me to the altar, run back for the door. I have two Meta points left so that’s enough.”
“Enough for what?!” Valerian shouted, swatting her hand away from his person. 
“To awaken the phoenix.”
That made his glowing eyes blink rapidly. 
“But there are no more phoenixes,” Artmond said, this time no one disagreeing with him except Evangeline. 
“There are, and they’re in there. But it’s going to put out a blast of holy fire when I release it and I have enough hit points to take it.” She left out the part that holy fire would do extra damage to Valerian without the resistance to good shield to offset it. His amulet would halve the extra damage, but it was still a big risk. But she didn’t dare say any of that. She knew she was freaking them out as it was. In the actual game, there was none of this conversation, no need to convince them of anything, she would just control them into doing what she needed, and they would execute that plan until the cut seen of the phoenix rising would take over. 
This was all different, and it made Evangeline unsure. This all felt more real and the danger more immediate… and permanent. 
But I can fix that if we just do this, she thought.
“Trust me,” she said instead. She held her hand out to Valerian so he could lead her. 
Still, his read shards for eyes bore into her, making dangerous promises. She could feel the anger wafting off him, but still she held firm. This was the only way through. 
He took it, and yanked hard, whipping her head back and forcing a yip out of her as they plunged into the dark. After that initial tug, Valerian slowed down to half speed, leading her through. 
Despite not being able to see anything in the inky black, Evangeline did know what the space looked like. Stone pews lined the room on either side, many of them collapsed and broken. Statues watched silently from along the walls and that was what had Valerian cautiously spooked, since usually the necromancer and his forces would be hiding in there. 
“It’s okay,” she assured. “It’s just us here.”
“Stop,” he ordered halting them.
“What? What is it?” Evangeline said, alarmed, concerned that she might have been wrong. 
“Step up,” Valerian said, tapping his boot on one of the two steps up to the altar. 
“Oh, right.” 
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 6 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 21 Only Mostly Dead
Evangeline couldn't actually hear the heroic music that would play at this moment, but she did in her own head as she reached up and caught her +1 knife out of the air and readied herself into a fighting stance. Valerian did as well, catching his first, then his second knife in a jump spin. The momentum brought him down onto the nearest skeleton, lending a damage bonus to his thieves’ strike attack and the first skeleton crumbled to the ground into a pile of bone dust, then vanishing as the spell within it broke apart. 
Kicking off the dirt in her bare feet, Evangeline did the same, moving to his other side as a second skeleton came up to flank him. Her attack didn’t do quite enough damage. It gave the skeleton the opportunity to follow through on its attack.
Valerian cried out as the skeleton’s weapon impaled his shoulder with a weapon that looked like it too was made of a sharpened femur. Despite his new wound, he swiped at the thing’s head. The blow knocked it clean off. The skeleton crumpled to the ground into dust in a puff. 
“Are you alright?” Evangeline cried, grabbing at Valerian’s wound. 
“I’m fine, keep fighting!” he shouted and turned to slash at the next skeleton. But it was clear to Evangeline that they were going to be overwhelmed by the skeletons too quickly. They had been caught flat-footed and without the armor they had just acquired. 
Scanning the battlefield, she saw Sigismund blasting radiant beams, blowing the skeletons to pieces and Artmond swinging his own sword, trying to keep those that got past her blasts. 
Hagor did a sort of hail mary, swung his Tangling Thorns wand at the necromancer, but the undead creature only laughed as the spiky vines twisted up his legs. They held him in place, but Hagor didn’t see the skeleton being puppeteered behind him. Shoved forward, Hagor stumbled into the Tangling Thorns, the vines turning on their summoner as they wrapped around his legs and around his waist.
“Come little fly, into my strap. Come little mouse, into my mouth,” the necromancer sang out, then lunged for Hagor. Sharp teeth bared, it sank them into Hagor’s arm. The large man screamed as his blood was sucked away. His face went pale and his frantic attempts to pull away became listless and weaker in a matter of seconds. 
“Hagor! No!” Evangeline cried. 
The biting didn’t last too long. The necromancer released Hagor on its own. It lifted its head to the sky, Hagor’s red blood dripping from its puckered mouth. Its bone pale face sported spots of pink on its cheeks, flush where Hagor was drained. 
“Hold on Hagor, I’m coming!” Artmond shouted, rushing toward the fight. 
“No!” Sigismund shouted after him, but a pair of skeletons blocked her way. 
It was Valerian who blocked the nobleman’s son from his suicide run. “We need to flee!” he shouted, pushing Artmond to the ground. 
“But we can’t leave him!” Artmond cried gesturing toward the poor, trapped Hagor. 
“We are outmatched and we’re going to have a total party kill if we stay!” Valerian shouted. 
Evangeline knew he was right. She could see it herself. The skeletons had action economy on their side. They would overwhelm their attacks, no matter how many they destroyed. 
“We can’t leave Hagor like this!” Artmond argued, trying to stand once more. As he did, a skeleton came up behind him, raising its bone-sword over its head to strike him mightily. Only it got blasted from behind by Sigismund, who rushed through the cascade of dust to push Artmond to his feet. 
She gasped for breath. “That was my last spell for the day!” she shouted, looking terribly afraid now that she was out of her holy arsenal. 
“What do we do then?” Artmond cried, turning to face another skeleton. His back faced Sigismond’s and Valerian’s and Evangeline realized they were forming up a last stand circle with skeletons all around. 
“What an ass,” Evangeline muttered, directing those words at the necromancer. 
Meta Knowledge: Activated. 
Suddenly, Evangeline remembered. She remembered fighting this specific scenario a few dozen times, working out tactics and strategies. Also, she remembered what was scripted. No matter what someone from the group would be attacked by the necromancer and “killed.”
And there was only one way to win this fight at their current levels. 
“They’re right. We have to retreat!” she shouted, then looked to Artmond as he whirled toward her, ready to argue again. 
“Back to the ruins!” she cried, “It’s our only chance!” 
The other two looked to her too, but she couldn’t waste any more time arguing. 
Turning on her heels, she barely dodged a skeleton attempting to slash its bony claws across her face. She ignored it though, disengaging from fighting and running toward the door that led out of their camp, knowing that they could still outrun skeletons who could only shuffle walk. It was only when she reached to pair of saplings bent over in a way that formed a door, that she turned back to see if the others had followed. 
“Don’t stop!” Valerian cried as he came up right behind her, nearly tripping over her as he tried to pull up short. 
“The collars! They’re keeping us together with Hagor. We have to wait!” Evangeline cried, turning in his arms to look back. 
“Wait for what?” Valerian shouted. 
“For Hagor to die,” she replied solemnly. 
They watched with detached solemnity as the vampire necromancer went in, attacking the lethargic body still entangled in its own magic. Then there was a shatter feeling at Evangeline’s neck as a chain of light appeared between the five of them, only for Hagor’s to burst into nothingness. 
Watching him die hurt. He had always been a character she had cared about, but to actually watch it happen in front of her, it felt… too real. 
No, he’s okay. He’s still going to be okay, she thought, pushing those feelings of realness down. 
“Okay, go, go, go!” Evangeline shouted plunging through the door, dragging Valerian with her.
Sigismund came next, with Artmond bravely trying to bring up the rear, but one of the skeletons followed behind. 
Then there was a flash, and they were all through the door and back into the main world. 
“Where… where did the skeleton go?” Artmond cried, turning this way and that, attempting to locate the monster he had just been fighting. 
Knowledge: Arcana.
“They can’t follow us through the door,” Evangeline explained. “They were created inside Hagor’s sanctuary, and their constructs, so they can’t leave until their master leaves and that guy is still entangled. This is our chance, head back to the temple!”
“Back to the temple?” Sigismund shouted, even as she followed after Evangeline, who had taken off beating the ground with her feet as fast as she could. 
“Yes! It’ll be safe. We’ve already cleared it out and the boss is here. This is our only chance!” she shouted. 
Valerian run up parallel to Evangeline. “Our only chance for what?” 
“To save Hagor.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 6 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 20 Who's the Boss?
A figure loomed over Evangeline, moving in closer, its mouth inches away from her neck. It paused as her eyes snapped open in the darkness, but she couldn’t see anything or make out what it was as she didn’t have the skill to do that. 
Apparently, she had gotten enough rest, because her memories were also back. 
“Valerian! What are you doing? Get away!” she practically shouted. She reverse crab-walked herself away from the looming figure, which sent her into the willow branches, moving them aside. 
A sliver of bright white moonlight cut through the branches illuminating the figure that had been about to bite her. 
It wasn’t Valerian.
Instead of his handsome features, it had a gray, ashy pallor. It might have been another color at one time, but whatever that color was, had long been lost. It was more skeleton than person, wrapped in a torn and rotting robe. But it had enough of a face to grin at her.
“I see, so you were hoping the vampire would sneak into your bedroll,” he creaked out. It took Evangeline a second to realize that the creaking was this thing’s version of laughter. "Sorry to disappoint you with my less than pretty visage, but I can promise you that we can have a similarly good time as well, if you give me a chance!”
“What an ass!” Evangeline said quickly, hoping that she had rested enough to refill half her Special Ability tics.
Special Ability: Meta Knowledge.
Just like that, understanding flooded her consciousness. 
She understood that this was in fact a very rare scenario in the game that only happened if three conditions were met. One: that Valerian hadn’t revealed to the main player, and therefore the whole party, that he was in fact a vampire childer himself. Two: that they had found the abandoned temple. Three: that they had taken a long rest before finishing the temple and defeating the main boss, which just happened to be the unchained vampire childer, who also happened to be a necromancer. When that happened, the necromancer would appear and attack them in their camp. 
It took only a second for Evangeline to understand all this and why she had been trying to push the group to finish the dungeon before resting. There had even been a hint that something was coming from Hagor’s dialogue, which she now also realized was something scripted he would say in the game as a clue. 
None of this information was helpful right at that moment. 
She heard the telltale sound of dice rolling. Oh crap, something had just happened, and she was pretty sure she had not passed that roll.
The necromancer sprang at her, his slight form moving with a lightning-fast jump. He landed on top of her, slapping a disgusting smelling hand over Evangeline’s mouth before she could scream. Teeth flashed in the moonlight, long spikey things that were too much for the creature’s mouth to contain as it reared up, preparing to strike. 
“No, no, no, no!” Evangeline tried to scream, but it just came out as indistinct, panicked sounds. 
Then the teeth came down and the creature used an enormous amount of strength to turn Evangeline’s head to the side, exposing her neck. She screamed, again muffled as she expected pain to sink into her neck. 
Instead, someone else grunted in pain. The force of the hand on her face lessened and Evangeline was able to turn her face back toward the threat. Just inches above her nose, the necromancer was chewing viciously on an arm, dripping blood down it. 
Evangeline only managed to turn her head in time to keep any of the blood from dropping into her own mouth. 
“Hagor! Help me!” Valerian shouted, his face twisted in pain as he used the arm the necromancer chewed on to try to trap the thing’s head in an armlock. It was Valerian’s blood dripping. 
Using his superior leverage, Valerian bent the necromancer back, giving Evangeline an opportunity. 
Skill: Acrobatics.
Shifting her hips, she made an attempt to dislodge herself out from under the thing’s grapple and managed to dig a toe into the turf to escape. Once she was free, Hagor moved in. Out of all of them, he was the only one who was armed. Taking a mighty swing the rod they had found in the temple. Instantly, growth erupted up from the ground, ensnarling itself around the necromancer’s limbs. Spikes shot out, piercing the monster all over and the pain of it forced its jaws open, releasing Valerian at last. 
Jumping back, Valerian cradled his wounded arm against his side, but otherwise seemed unbothered by it, just out of breath.
Stuck in its kneeling position, the necromancer only made a token effort to resist its bonds, then it brandish both of hands, claws up, toward the sky. It started chanting incomprehensible words and clouds covered the moon, plunging them all back into darkness. Then it reached into its robe and threw out several chips of bone from a hidden pocket.
“Oh, crap! He’s going to summon minions! Don’t let them hit the ground!” she tried to warn everyone, but it already threw the chips even as she spoke. The second the pieces it the ground, a fully grown skeleton burst from what seemed like too little bone. Within a few seconds, they were surrounded by a dozen of the monsters. 
This was why it was a boss fight. And they were caught flat-footed and without their weapons and armor. 
“Dammit!” Valerian cursed, backing up toward Evangeline, who scrambled up to her feet. 
The necromancer cackled maniacally, clearly understanding its moment of triumph was at hand. Then a bright white flash cut through the redarkened night, hitting the necromancer full on in the chest, cutting its mirth short. 
“Solario!” Sigismund shouted, and a bright ball of light erupted above them, dispelling the night’s natural darkness. 
“Hurry everyone! Catch!” Artmond shouted.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 6 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 19 - Long Rest Rituals
“Oh yeah, sure,” Evangeline invited. 
The larger woman entered already looking like she had gotten a shower and her robe laundered. “Here,” she said, thrusting out a carved stone talisman to her. “You can borrow this if you want.”
Evangeline took the talisman, looking over the carving on it. It looked like a happy little fish tossing its tail and water spray in a joyful arc. “What is it?” she asked.
“Just say the word, Refreshor. With the ‘or’ sound, not ‘er,’” Sigismund said. 
Evangeline did and then a feeling like bubbly water seemed to rush all over her skin and through her hair like a wave had burst underneath her clothing. A sweet smell of roses and lavender tickled her nose, and she swore she heard a splashing giggle. Running a hand through her hair, she realized that it felt clean and soft instead of sweat-stiff and tangled. 
“Oh wow, that is a marvelous bit of magic,” Evangeline said, handing it back. 
“Soapstone,” Sigismund said. “I always have one with me when I travel. Makes getting cleaned up easier.”
“I feel very fresh, thank you,” Evangeline agreed. 
Sigismund nodded, moving to leave, then hesitated. “Look, I know it’s not my place to say, but … watch out for Valerian. There’s something not right about him, and I don’t trust it.”
“Do you trust anyone?” Evangeline quipped, cracking a half grin.
Sigismund returned it. “That’s fair. No, I don’t.”
“Not even Artmond?”
Her shoulders stiffened. “He is my lord’s son. Absolutely I cannot trust him. At least, not to keep himself out of trouble. More like… I know I cannot rely on him.” She blew out a breath. “Look, take the advice or not. It’s really not skin off my nose.” And with that, she flounced away.
Evangeline couldn’t help cracking her own grin as she stretched, feeling “refreshored.” Getting up, she took a glance through the branches of the willow tree. On the edge of her consciousness was the rattle of dice rolling as she peered. 
Hagor and Artmond were at the fire, cooking food as Sigismund approached Artmond, holding out the soapstone to him. There was no sign of Valerian anywhere. 
Which was because he stood right behind her.
“Holy Hell!” Evangeline exclaimed when she turned around and found him standing too close behind her. 
“Need to work on your perception,” Valerian smirked, one of his pale eyebrows lifting as he crossed his arms. 
“And you need to work on boundaries.” 
“I said I wanted a word,” he reminded her. 
That’s right. He did. “What do you want?” she asked, crossing her arms to mirror his. 
“We need to talk. You keep implying that you know something about me, but you don’t follow through on what that is.”
Evangeline sighed, feeling very tired. “If I did know what you are talking about, Val, I don’t know it right now because I barely know my own name until I get some rest.”
“Yes, that is a mighty convenient excuse,” he pointed out. 
“Okay, how about this.” Evangeline laid a hand on his crossed forearm. Valerian jumped a little but didn’t shake her off, his narrow eyes now wider and completely focused on him. “If there was anything about your secret, whatever it is, that I could use to harm you, I would have done it already.”
He stepped back, out of her touch. “You could just be waiting for the most opportune moment.”
“Yeah, but I’m not. I’m just waiting for you to leave so I can go to bed,” she said, a pounding behind her eyes growing more insistent as he grew more insistent. 
“You…” he cocked his head at her. “You really don’t know, do you? I can usually tell when people lie to me. They’ve been doing it most of my life, but you… you genuinely mean it.”
“If you want to tell me your secret, I’ll be willing to listen. I’m pretty sure it won’t change a thing about how I feel about you.”
“Oh you have ‘feelings’ about me eh?” he asked with a suggestive tone, his voice growing huskier. 
She knew what he was getting at, but she didn’t take his bait. “Well, of course, I have feelings about you. I like you a great deal. We’re all in this together.”
“Hmm, you know… you’re more gullible than I originally took you for,” he replied, lightening his tone, then backed off. 
“Thanks,” she replied much more coolly.
“Oh don’t get me wrong. I like naïve. It gives me a chance to show people the error of their ways.” His grin sharpened. “Trust me, you would have fun with it too.”
Evangeline took a step back from the innuendo. “I thought you made it abundantly clear that you don’t like me.”
“I never said I didn’t like you,” he purred. “I mean, after all, you are right. We are in this together. And if you have no intention of being an enemy, we could try friends?”
“Only if you mean it,” she said, surprising herself with that answer. Where did that come from?
“Why wouldn’t I mean it? Now I’m hurt.” He pouted his lower lip and then he took a step out through the willow branch curtain. “Alright then. I’ll wait to finish this conversation in the morning when you’ve fully refreshed yourself.”
And with that, he exited fully and moved away further into the camp. 
Evangeline let out a breath. “It’s been a full day,” she muttered to herself. “Let’s just get something to eat and go to sleep. Deal with any other problems in the morning.”
And she did just that. It was nice to share the comradery of food around a fire, and once she settled into her bedroll, and for the first time in a while—though she couldn’t remember why—she let out a contented sigh as she dropped off to sleep.
She wasn’t sure what it was that woke her up. Maybe it had been a successful perception roll, maybe it had been the dreams she had been having, or maybe she had just gotten lucky.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 7 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 18 Long Rest Before Boss Fight
“Well, that explains all of the skeletons,” Artmond pointed out in his unhelpful, helpful way. 
“What does that matter? We are not equipped to take on a vampire!” Sigismund shouted. 
“Except, he’s not really a vampire. He’s a childer. That’s not as bad. We can totally take him.”
“Childers are connected to vampires. Where there is one, there is the other!” Sigismund continued. 
“Not necessarily,” Valerian chimed in from where he had decided to lean against the wall in his defensively casual way. “Could be … and frankly probably is, an unchained childer.”
“A what now?” Sigismund challenged, wrinkling up her nose like she smelled something foul. 
“Unchained childer,” Valerian said, straightening up to take the stage. “A vampire childer whose vampire master has perished, both setting them free from their control but also making it impossible for the childer to ever evolve into a full vampire. Trapping them in a terribly weakened state.” He licked his lips at that thought. “I think Evie here is right. We could take him.”
“Yeah, but … do we really need to?” Artmond asked. Everyone looked to him, and he shrugged. “I mean, we came in here to get some better equipment and I would say we all have. Why don’t we just count our wins and leave? We can get heading to town?”
“Or better yet, go to the camp and heal up our wounds.”
“Well, we’ve disturbed the vampire now,” Evangeline said. “He’d… I would think he would just come after us, right?”
“Why? How?” Sigismund questioned. “He hasn’t seen our faces. He’ll have no idea who took out his skeletons. And if he’s been here the entire time, then it’s not like we’ve unleashed him or anything. This isn’t our problem.”
“Is there anything he’s got that would benefit us if we pushed ahead and defeated him?” Valerian asked sensibly.
“There is…” but Evangeline didn’t know. The knowledge simply wasn’t there, the power of the Meta point had run out. “I’m not sure.”
“You know, I agree with Artmond,” Sigismund said. “We should head back to camp.”
That seemed to decide things for the group, who paused only long enough to check the skeleton bones for any useful trinkets or weapons, of which there was nothing much but a handful of coins. 
Discouraged, Evangeline followed the group, shutting the door to the final boss area closed on her way out. 
# # #
Like Hagor had said, the token summoned the doorway to the camp, and it looked much the same as it had the first night. Once all were inside, Hagor gestured to make the doorway of branches disappear.
“There, I’ve essentially locked the door,” he said with a smile. 
Evangeline returned the smile, but she didn’t find the gesture entirely reassuring. “So no one can find us here, is what you’re saying?”
“Oh no, it’s not like that. My sanctuary ability, we’re still in the world, so it creates itself out of that world. We are still in the forest outside of the ruins, but the magic reconfigures it into this. To anyone outside who doesn’t have one of my tokens, it just looks like a very tall bramble thicket, but if they pushed through it, they would find us on the other side.”
“Like a vampire childer?” Evangeline asked, narrowing her eyes. 
Hagor shifted on his feet uncomfortably. “Look, we moved far enough away, and I do think that Sigismund is right. The chances of them finding us are very small. We’re safe to rest here, even if we do have limited food.”
“But it wouldn’t hurt to set watches too,” Valerian said. “Can’t really take chances with a vampire about, can we?” He directed the question straight to Evangeline, and she got the distinct feeling he was implying something to her, but she had no idea what.
In response to her raised eyebrow, Valerian gave her a warm smile as if she were his closest friend and they were sharing a private joke. “Hey Evie, can I have a word with you for just a moment?”
“Uh, sure,” she said, not able to come up with a reason not to. 
Hagor bristled at the question and bristled even more when Valerian laid a hand on Evangeline’s shoulder. “Rogue stuff,” he said. “Tradecraft. You understand. I really want to know more about what techniques, you know.”
Evangeline straightened her mouth into a straight line. “I’m going to go find a bedroll first and get out of this gambeson. I’ll come find you when we get the campfire going.”
And with that, she exited, heading over to her favorite sleeping spot, under the willow tree, the branches making a sort of curtained-off room from the rest of the camp. She just needed a moment to herself. It felt so weird again, not remembering anything that she knew she had known earlier that day, including how under the willow tree could be her favorite spot when she only had slept there once before.
“Gods, this is all unsettling,” she muttered to herself as she kicked open the bedroll and sat down on the weather-proofed leather. The dark purpling bruise on her shoulder where she had taken the hit. The gambeson had proven to make all the difference on that attack. To her surprise though, the slash she had received was completely healed but for the bloodstains on her skin and shirt. Even the tear in the gambeson had been mended as if the slash had never happened. 
“That’s some good healing magic,” Evangeline said out loud. 
“You’re welcome,” Sigismund replied, just from the other side of the willow branches. “May I… may I come in?” she asked, a distinct softening in her tone.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 7 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 17 - A Bone to Pick
While the skeleton attacked, Hagor moved to its other side into flank, tapping it with his new rod. (The pun was not lost on her.) From the stone, thorn-covered vines shot out to entrap the skeleton’s legs. It staggered it, allowing it to only take one attack instead of its usual two. It used that attack, however, to score a hit on her shoulder on her unweaponed hand. 
“Ow!” The blade hadn’t cut through her gambeson, but she could tell it would bruise. She took the opportunity to make her own attack again, which once more landed and once more did very little to bother the skeleton. 
“This is not good!” she shouted when she saw it. 
“Hang on, Evangeline,” Hagor shouted, moving to try to use the hilt of the rod to pommel strike the skeleton, but the skeleton did not care. It remained focused on Evangeline and now had both strikes at its disposal. Evangeline tried to disengage, but she had already attempted another strike, leaving her open. The first knife felt like fire cutting through the gambeson and into the flesh of her side. The second knife came for her face.
With a flash of overly bright light, a sword blade sliced through the skeleton’s striking hand. The blade slid along Evangeline’s face, leaving a small cut and very little damage. 
At the same time, Hagor swung his rod like it was a baseball bat, taking the skeleton’s head clean off. Thorny vines sprouted from the head to catch the stone wall, trapping it there like a swinging basket. 
Evangeline looked up into Artmond’s triumphant, if blood-covered, face. He grinned beautifully. “I did it!” he said, clearly as amazed as she was at what he had done. 
“Good job, but the fight’s not over yet!” Evangeline said, pushing past him to head to the open door another new skeleton was emerging from. There were two more right behind it. 
Warmth washed over Evangeline as she went, along with a spray of sparkles dancing over her skin, erasing the scratches on her arms and presumably her face. 
“Thanks!” she called to Sigismund, who didn’t answer, turning to Artmond to cast another healing over him. 
“Did you see what I did?” he asked her gleefully, completely ignoring the disapproving line of her mouth. 
Just as Evangeline got to the doorway, she was swallowed up by darkness. A hand grabbed her, pulling her back a step so that her back slapped against the wall beside the doorway. 
“Let them go past,” Valerian hissed in her ear, his hand still holding her wrist. Evangeline complied as the skeletons stumbled through the doorway into the inky black. “Strike when I strike.”
“But I can’t see,” she tried to argue.
“Strike!” he ordered, lifting his knife over his head and leaping into thieves-trick. 
Evangeline could only do the same. 
The blind strike worked. Her knife sank into the head of the stumbling skeleton, cutting a chunk of it away. Her next strike hit it firmly in the spine, and the whole thing crumbled to the ground into a pile of bones. 
“Hells yeah!” she shouted in triumphant, only to be immediately undercut. “The other skel—!” she called out then was cut off as her back hit the ground, cutting off the rest of her air. Heavy metal boots tromped down on her, which was not something she thought could happen in the game as an attack, but it hurt just the same. She rolled, also something she couldn’t do in the game, to get out from under its feet, with the small hope that she could knock it prone as well. 
She felt more than saw someone leap over her. Valerian roared as he hit metal, crashing the skeleton to the ground beside her, and he repeatedly clanged his knife over and over again into the monster.
A few breaths later, the darkness blinding them dissipated, revealing the vampire rogue, kneeling over the shattered remains of the skeleton, still stabbing with his shouts of rage. 
“Valerian! Val! You got it!” Evangeline shouted.
He whirled toward her, his usually calm reddish eyes glowing bright with the same sparks of red light the skeletons had. 
“Oh, crap! He’s possessed!” Evangeline shouted. 
Then Valerian blinked, instantly coming back to himself. His shoulders dropped, and he lowered his knife. Then he stood up, shaking his head and clearing the light in his eyes. 
“Is it … over?” Artmond asked, already tired as he dragged his sword across the ground. 
“For the moment, take a breath,” Evangeline said, opening her menu to stare down at her stats. Only one Meta point left. 
“So that’s it? There is nothing else in these ruins?” Sigismund demanded. She looked as rough as Evangeline felt, smudges of black and at least two bruises decorating her face. 
There it was again that same pressure. Foreknowledge. 
“Evangeline?” Hagor asked, and she found the whole group was looking to her. 
She blew out a breath. “Okay, I have one Meta point left, and yes, I do think there is something up ahead that we should know about, but…”
“Then do it already,” Valerian pushed. 
“If I lose this last Meta point, that will be it, I won’t be able to help you all with whatever comes next. I mean, outside of … you know … stabby stabby.” She demonstrated her meaning with her knife. 
Her companions looked at each other, followed by nods. “Alright,” Artmond said. 
“Go ahead, Evangeline. We’ll take care of you,” Hagor agreed.
Encouraged, she nodded then spent her last point for the day. 
“Oh. Right.”
“What? What is it?” Sigismund asked. 
“Well, uh… there’s a necromancer up ahead. And he’s a vampire.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 7 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 16 "Tangling Thorns"
“There the display case,” Evangeline said, pointing it out. It was made of broken glass, and what wasn’t broken was covered in dust, and wedged between a bookshelf and a scrollshelf. Picking her way through the detritus of broken desks and the contents they once contained, as well as whatever things the local wildlife had brought in to nest with, Evangeline reached it first. 
“Do you need a light?” Hagor asked, following but moving much slower. 
“Yeah, it’s pitch black over here,” she replied as she peered through, trying to make out the rod she could barely make out inside.
Warm yellow washed over her as Hagor approached, holding his hand out to show a bright orb in it that she couldn’t stare directly at. 
“Perfect. Hold it up for me,” Evangeline said and bent down to pick up a broken piece of marble from the floor. Using that, she broke the rest of the glass.
“Careful,” Hagor warned, but she barely heeded him as she threaded her fingers through the new opening to grasp the wooden rod within. 
“Got it!” she cried triumphantly and withdrew it from the case. She presented it to the druid, avoiding the thorns sticking out from the main body. “That should allow you to cast Tangling Thorns. 
Hagor nodded as he held the rod up, looking at the small runes carefully carved along what counted as the handle on it. “It’s astounding that something like this would have been lost or forgotten here.”
“Yeah, we’re … really lucky,” Evangeline said, “The gods must really like us.” Though what she meant was “programmers.”
That made Hagor pause, tilting his head thoughtfully. “Ah, are these… Do you think these are gifts from your god Meta?” 
“I … wouldn’t bet on it,” Evangeline said carefully. “But let’s just make sure we use it well.” Opening the door that led back into the main hall, she jumped as a rusted sword missed her by inches. Standing in the doorway was a skeleton creature. Its armor was tattered and rusted. A bit even fell off as it stood there, staring at Evangeline and Hagor with its bright red lights in the pits of its eye sockets. In its bony hands, it held a pristine long sword, the point currently biting into the ground.
“We’re under attack!” Artmond shouted as he retreated from another skeleton in a tattered robe. 
Caught by surprise, Evangeline moved to pull her +1 dagger from her belt while her body instinctively reacted to back up. But Hagor was immediately behind her, taking too long to have the same reaction. The skeleton shifted, lifting its sword back up to take another attack and Evangeline could see there would be nothing she could do to stop it from hitting. She was flat-footed and surprised after. 
Before it could the skeleton was swallowed by darkness. A single flash glinted out of the darkness as a figure cloaked in the stuff leapt up. The single flash became a knife drive straight into the skeleton’s head as it disappeared into the perfect dark. Valerian’s head appeared out of his Cloak of Darkness. He grinned at her wickedly, confirming to her that he had just saved her life.
Then he held up two fingers on one hand and one finger on his knife hand. 
“2-1.”
“You dick!” Evangeline snarled, which only made him smirk more before disappearing back into his darkness.
“What is going on? I can’t see anything!” Artmond howled as the darkness that was centered on Valerian shifted with him. 
“Cancel it, you idiot! None of us can see anything to land our own attacks!” Sigismund screeched. 
“It’s not a problem for me!” Valerian hollered, followed by a few more triumphant “has” as he attacked. 
“Agh! I’ve been hit!” Artmond wailed from somewhere in the darkness. 
Evangeline hated to, but she burned her second to last Meta point. “Valerian’s darkness is only a ten-foot radius around him! Take two or three steps in any direction away from where you think he is, you should be out of it and able to see.”
“What the hells!” Valerian cried. “How the hells do you know that?”
“It lasts for three minutes, so just work around it,” Evangeline continued, ignoring his protests. He had already moved away from her, and she could see again. The skeleton that had been attacking her was a crumpled pile of bones at her feet with the pristine sword resting in the middle of it. It was a good sword, though having no more Meta points to burn, she’d have to wait to figure out why later. 
She picked it up. 
She was not at all proficient with long swords, and it showed in the way she tried to hold the weapon in one hand, her dagger in the other. It was clear, this weapon wouldn’t do her any good. Sticking it behind her, she let it disappear into her inventory, then pulled the inventory up. The sword sat in a little box like she expected it to. Holding up her fingers, she hoped this would work like it did when she played the game. A menu dropped connected to the item. Along with a list of things she could do with the sword, such as drop it, equip it, or send it to camp, and there was also a list of everyone in her “party.” 
She made her selection. “Artmond, check your inventory!” she shouted. Then turned as another skeleton, this one wielding two rusty daggers, closed in toward her. It attacked and missed with both of its attacks. She couldn’t attempt a thieves-trick without having an advantage to do so, leaving her with a paltry stab toward its face, which scored a hit but did almost nothing. 
“Not an auspicious start,” she said. 
She could imagine the skeleton grinning at her. 
“Hagor! I could really use some help right here!”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 7 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 15 "The Eternal Debate"
Evangeline slipped out the piece of armor from the box. 
Knowledge: Armor and Weaponry
“It’s a gambeson,” she said recognizing it as she unfolded the piece so that she could see it better, the weight of it heavy on her fingers. The sleeves ended at what would be her elbow. “Light armor. Does not affect stealth checks.” She turned it about in her hands. “Looks to be in good condition.”
“Here, give me the lock pick set,” Valerian ordered, holding his fingers out for it with a snap. 
While she didn’t care for the snap, she was too preoccupied with her find to comment. It was just easier to pass it to him and keep looking over her first piece of new armor. 
He scurried over to start unlocking the chest on the other side. 
“That would be a good piece for Artmond to wear,” Sigismund said, coming up beside Evangeline, looking down her nose warningly. 
“Well, that’s not exactly fair,” Artmond said, undercutting her immediately. “Evangeline found it. She should wear it.”
Sigismund sighed a growl. “But you just got hurt and badly. You’re the weakest of all of us here, with the least amount of hit points. If we don’t get you some armor soon, I’m going to spend the majority of my healing ability, just keeping you alive.”
Evangeline hesitated, mulling over Sigismund’s logic. “She has a point,” the rogue conceded. 
“Yeah, but…” Artmond declared, unwilling to let it go. “The rogues are the ones that put themselves in danger first, trying to keep the rest of us safe. She should have the gambeson, and I promise to wait from now on until she says it’s safe. It’s not her fault that I was an idiot.”
“Oh, here we go!” Valerian crowed triumphantly from the other side of the room. He held up a pair of gloves in one hand and a necklace in the other. “If I read this symbol correctly, the necklace grants five additional hit points.”
“Give that here,” Sigismund demanded, heading straight for it. 
Immediately, Valerian tucked the necklace behind his back, standing to face down the tall woman, who definitely had a few inches on him. 
Sigismund was not deterred. “That necklace bears the symbol of my order of the Divine Sun. As a member of that order, I demand that you relinquish it to me!”
“I found it first,” Valerian responded with all the conviction of playground logic. 
“You’re stealing it from my orders offering box!” she shouted.
“Look around you, dear lady cleric. This place is a-band-ond,” he said, emphasizing each syllable. “This isn’t stealing. This is salvage.”
“Okay, how about this,” Evangeline said, standing up so she could slip on the gambeson. “There are going to be other things we find in this place that each one of us can use. How about this time, I keep the gambeson; Valerian, you give Sigismund—” He opened his mouth to object, but Evangeline held up a hand. “Aaaaand, you keep the gloves of unlocking.” She pointed at them in his other hand. “Those will give you a bonus on your lockpicking skills.” 
He stopped all other objects to look down at the gloves. “They will?”
“Put them on and see,” Evangeline said as she refocused her attention on slipping the leather straps on the gambeson into the buckles, loving how the dark blue color of the padded cloth looked. 
Valerian released the amulet to Sigismund and did as he was told, slipping on the gloves with leather padding on the front and backs of his hands, but held in place by a stretchy cloth. The tips were fingerless and he flexed his hands once they were on, then gestured in the air, presumably looking at his stats table. 
“Huh,” he said as if he were surprised to find she was right. 
“Look, we’re going to have to share all the gear to get through this, so I think it would be best if it goes to the person who can utilize it the best, for all of our benefits, okay?” she continued. 
“Yes, Mother,” Valerian said, with a sardonic smile and his eyelids halfway down in a way that made his beautiful face look ugly. 
Sigismund sniffed as well, her look saying, “Who the hell put you in charge?” but she had the grace to not say it, only flounced away. 
Artmond’s expression was apologetic and Hagor wouldn’t look at her, becoming suddenly very interested in the new door at the end of the hall. 
“This one doesn’t seem to have a lock,” he said, shrugging with a dry laugh. “Not that I would really know.”
Evangeline took it as the invitation it was and came up beside him to look at herself. 
“You’re right, you know,” he said to her softly as she ran her fingers around the frame looking for trap triggers. “I think we’re going to have to figure out how to work together and you did nothing wrong pointing it out to everyone.”
“You sure? I feel like I just came off all sanctimonious,” Evangeline replied. 
“Ha, maybe a little, but we’re also all under a lot of stress right now. No one expected to be magically chain-ganged together like this.” He slipped his fingers under his collar, lifting it up to illustrate his point. When he did so, a silky sliver of magic wafted between them then disappeared again. 
Gazing into those warm brown-green eyes, Evangeline tried to remember why it was she never felt like romancing Hagor instead of Valerian. What wasn’t attractive about his warmth and gentleness? Warmth wafted off his barrel-chested body, and he fingered the talisman around his neck. 
Evangeline felt a pressure, that feeling that she could use her Meta Knowledge to answer the question and that it had something to do with that talisman. 
But she turned away, shaking her head. 
There were better uses for that skill than remembering something like that. She would have to just re-find out the normal way.
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 8 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 14
“Just tell me if you have a condition or not!” Sigismund chided as she held her hands out over the burn marks on the surface of Artmond’s jerkin. He had been sucking at his breath since getting hit full force with the fire bolt, and even though Evangeline knew the magic would take care of the damage, it made her anxious to watch Artmond’s face go pale. Like he really could die or something. 
“What does it matter? Just heal him already?” Valerian snapped, aggravated by Artmond’s whimpers. 
Sigismund growled. “If I heal him but don’t fix the condition, he’ll just bleed out hit points and then keel over when it is most inconvenient!”
“None! It says ‘none,’” Artmond breathed out, flicking his hand into the air before himself while Hagor supported him from behind. 
Evangeline stood by the side unsure of what to do to even help the situation.
“There! Now, I suggest you make haste before his caterwauling summons something nasty and hungry,” Valerian sneered, folding his arms across his chest. Then he glanced over at Evangeline. “Is there something nasty and hungry ahead?”
“Uh,” she hesitated before shaking her head. “No, no. Nothing like that.” 
“Oh? And what is it like, my little roguish prophetess?” He chucked a finger under her chin, sending chills skittering down her spine and arms. Valerian smirked, knowing exactly what his little unexpected gesture had done. He was like a cat playing with a mouse trapped on a string. 
“Regeneris!” Sigismund said with a breath, her voice thrumming with power. Light emerged from her hands, washing over Artmond’s chest. Immediately, he took a deep breath in, the desperate gasping easing. 
“Oh good, the little nobleman’s son is going to live,” Valerian said. 
Sigismund’s gaze snapped to Valerian. “How did you know?”
“Well, darling, what else could he be? And, in fact, I didn’t know, so thank you for confirming that for me.” His wicked grin slid across his face again. 
Sigismund shot him a not literally incinerating look, then offered her hand to Artmond, helping him to his feet, with Hagor supporting him behind. 
“I’m sorry, everyone,” Artmond said, patting his chest once he stood. “And Valerian is right, I am Lord Cassiel’s son. Artmond de Cassiel.” He offered a small bow but immediately winced as his chest was still tender from the quick healing. 
“Alright, that is one mystery solved,” Valerian said, then looked to Sigismund. “So how are you related to him?”
“Oh, she’s not… related to me, I mean,” Artmond interjected. “She’s my family’s personal cleric.” Then he reconsidered. “And the—”
“Shut it, Artmond!” Sigismund snapped, definitely putting in doubt who worked for whom, especially when Artmond immediately obeyed it, even tucking his hands behind his back like a little boy having got caught with his hands in the cookie jar. 
“Hmm-hmm,” Valerian murmured, glancing over at Evangeline who returned the same look as they were obviously having the same thought. 
Then Valerian shrugged. “Well, I don’t really care. I was just wondering if I could get you to say. Shall we continue to traverse this little death trap of a temple of yours? I’ve already turned the trap off, so this room should be safe?”
Evangeline nodded. “Yeah, yeah. We’re safe in here now.”
“Then you’re first, lady rogue,” he said, gesturing for her to proceed. 
Ignoring his baiting tone, Evangeline went over to the first alcove. Before the statue, stood a crate-sized box, placed there to receive offerings from the gods’ followers. It wasn’t locked, and she knew it wasn’t a trap. The trap in that room had already been set off. Opening it up, she found some rotten flowers, a rusted curved knife a gardener would use, and a few gold coins. She picked up the coins and put them in her pocket then glanced over at Valerian. 
He arched an eyebrow at her, then turned to his own side of the room and proceeded to check inside the boxes there. 
They worked their way down each side, checking the boxes. On the third one, Evangeline crowed in laughter. 
“What?” Valerian asked irritably as he pocketed his own handful of coins. 
She picked up the creaky leather roll inside. “Thieves’ tools!” she declared, holding it up as the prize it was.
“You jest?” he asked, giving up on his side and its paltry offerings to come over to hers. “That is eerily convenient.”
Evangeline shrugged as she glanced up at the worn-down statue. “Maybe this was a god of thieves or something.” She opened up the roll and looked at the metal tools inside. They were spotted here and there with rust but were otherwise serviceable. She had never actually looked inside one of the “thieves’ tools” bundles she found in the game. They all just “worked” whenever she used them, the dice roller being more important than the actual animation to show the picking. 
She released them to Valerian, who slid a couple of the tools out and back, checking them more thoroughly than she had. 
“You know what this means?” she commented impishly. 
He met her grin with a raised eyebrow. “What?”
“Something in here is locked.”
She took the roll back and went to the last offering box waiting at the end. Sure enough, this one had a lock on it. 
“That’s just a coincidence,” Valerian tried to say, folding his arms over his chest. 
“This one has a lock on it too!” Hagor reported, having taken over where Valerian had left off checking the offering boxes on the opposite side of the room. 
Annoyed, Valerian sucked on his teeth and returned his attention to Evangeline as she knelt and slipped two tools out of the roll. It was uncanny how easily she understood what to do, even though she was pretty sure this was the first lock she would ever pick. She set the tools into the lock, and that nebulous, continual sound of dice rattling rang in her ears as she slipped in and bumped the mechanism open. The lock fell off, and her grin morphed into a triumphant smile as she flipped the lid open. 
“Oh!” said Valerian as he leaned forward to look inside. “Wasn’t expecting that.”
To be continued...
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meganmackieauthor · 8 months ago
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I Can't Get the Vampire Rogue to Romance Me - Ch 13
The door stood in the middle of the hill, a carved stone slab partially obscured by vines that didn’t grow anywhere else on the hill. It couldn’t have looked more like someone was trying to “hide” a door there. Still, her new companions took the approach to it seriously, with the others falling back without being told to, leaving the rogues to move forward. 
Evangeline would have walked straight up to it, but Valerian threw out an arm to stop her, his eyes scanning the small grass-covered ramp of ground leading up. It took her a heartbeat to realize he was checking for traps. 
“It’s fine,” she said, pushing past his hand to go the rest of the way up to the door. 
The whole group behind her reacted, jumping at her cavalier approach, but she ignored them and turned the handle on the door.
“What in the hells are you doing?” Valerian hissed, snatching her hand away from the door faster than she registered that he had done it. 
“There are no traps outside the shrine. We’re fine. We just need to unlock the door and go in. I don’t exactly want to wait twenty minutes out here for you to figure out I’m right.” Then she realized something. “Oh crap. We don’t have lockpicks yet, so we can’t pick the door. How did I get it open bef—” Stopping herself before hearing what she had almost said. 
“Hence why we should investigate,” Valerian gritting his teeth. And granted he was making sense, but Evangeline was certain there were no traps.
Valerian didn’t wait for her to figure out where her logic was going wrong. Instead, he turned back to the group. “Hey. Do any of you happen to carry larceny tools?” 
That got everyone to start digging in their packs, looking for bits of wire or anything to possibly craft a set of larceny tools. 
Evangeline ignored all of it and studied the door before her. With a thought, she summoned up her stat table. As before, the Meta Knowledge winked at her, tempting her to just take the easiest answer and spend another of her special skill points, but she ignored it this time. 
It would be more fun to figure it out.
She studied the list of skills below her special ones. It was then that she realized a few of them had spouted branches since the last time she looked. Now, instead of just Thieves Skill, there was a little plus sign behind it that opened into several more lines of individual skills, such as pickpocketing, lockpicking, and larceny. All of them had fairly low numbers in them, too low to open this door even if she rolled well. 
“How did I open you before?” she asked the door. Not surprisingly, or rather thankfully, it didn’t answer. 
She next studied the reliefs carved into the stone surface, the edges rubbed smooth and rounded by implied “time” and “rain.” Then she heard the rattling sound and her Meta Knowledge: History activated. 
Many of these ancient temples would seal their doors with a special sequence of impressions that when touched would unseal the door. You notice three such impressions here.
And the lighted circles highlighted on the door’s surface. 
“Okay, I think I can unlock the door with this,” Valerian said, literally shoving Evangeline out of the way so that he could kneel before the door. While he settled himself before the door, to set up his lockpicks, Evangeline returned the favor. She hip-checked him, knocking him off his perched knee, and stuck her fingers and a thumb quickly into the three depressions.
Inside the door was a metallic click click click, and then the door shifted back.
Satisfied, Evangeline grinned down at Valerian, whose surprised face darkened at her success.
Then she did the cheekiest thing she could think of. She held up one finger and circled the other at him. “1-0,” she said as she passed through the door. 
“Oh well, that was easy!” Hagor said, unknowingly twisting the knife on Evangeline’s win. 
They all followed her in, Valerian bringing up the rear. Just inside the new space, what would have been a sort of foyer of the temple, they gathered to take the place in. 
As far as epic halls went, it wasn’t that grand. It had four pillars going down each side of an aisle with alcoves between each pillar on either side. Within those alcoves were destroyed statues of whatever gods used to be in residence there. Evangeline heard the rattle as her Meta Knowledge: Religions popped up, but her roll wasn’t high enough to identify any of them. The others all marveled as well.
“Look at that. She was right! This is one of those old pantheon temples,” Artmond said, giggling with delight. 
“I don’t recognize any of them though,” Sigismund said, wrinkling her nose in consternation at that fact, but the fact that she wasn’t making the roll either made Evangeline feel a little better. Because, clearly, if the cleric, whose Knowledge: Religions stats were higher, couldn’t make it, none of them would. 
“Oh wait, I think that is the Sky Lord!” Artmond cried, pointing at the nearest alcove, while stepping toward it.
“No! Wait!” both Valerian and Evangeline cried, reaching out too late to stop their companion from stepping on the trap plate right in front of him. 
The room exploded with fire. Firebolts were shooting across the space back and forth as well as diagonally. Artmond took a direct hit to the chest with the first one, knocking him down and thankfully back amongst the rest of them. 
Sigismund crouched immediately by his side, to pull him the rest of the way to safety in the foyer, while Hagor startled back against the wall behind them. 
“I thought you said there weren’t any traps!” Sigismund screeched. 
“Outside the temple!” Evangeline cried, but it was hard to hear over the roaring fires. 
Then, all at once, it stopped. The room was pitch black and smoking except for what light filtered in through the still-open door. Unsure of what happened, Evangeline looked to Valerian, who had reached around the corner. 
He shot her back his shit-eating grin. “1-1.”
To be continued...
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