medusiodmycelium

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The Baudelaires: That's count Olaf! Every adult in a five mile radius: Don't be ridiculous.

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asoue + reductress

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If the p*rn bots keep liking my asoue posts, I’m gonna start asking them what they think is in the sugar bowl

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Maybe it’s best we don’t know the contents of the sugar bowl.

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Thinking about Dr. Montgomery Montgomery who was so pissed at his coworkers he found a nice snake and decided to call it the incredibly deadly viper just to fuck with everyone

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Lemony Snicket, The Beatrice Letters

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There are a lot of words I already knew when I first read A Series of Unfortunate Events, but I never forget specifically which ones I did learn from it

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I put the asoue dedications in OpenAI and had the ai write me a few, here are my favorites

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Bitches be like “this is my comfort series” and it’s a series about three orphan children being terrorized by a count who wants their fortune and keeps murdering everyone they love

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Happy pride month to mysterious apprentices, determined chemists, journalists in towns without newspapers, girls with question mark eyebrows and smiles that could mean anything, girls that perform a two-person caper on their own, Jacques Snicket, chefs that love their gfs, typists with strict mothers, recently kidnapped actresses, and firefighting sculptors <33

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i genuinely stan esme squalour’s fashion choices. have the guts to dress up as the horny salad or rubber octopus you want to see in the world

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lolz 

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Creator Gets off Ass and Creates Something, wait till the readers of The Daily Punctilio hear about this! A Series of Unfortunate Events + Onion headlines (12/?)

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Henchperson guide