Once upon a time on a TV channel in Britain a TV show broke my heart and then mended it all at once. I was lost from then on. I have been mad, I am probably always going to be fat. I have missed out on love and I have fallen so hard I thought I would never breathe properly again. But I have survived. My Mad Fat Diary showed me that I, little old me, am a survivor and sometimes our stories do have a happy ending. I just haven't got to the end yet. (Also, Nico Mirallegro makes me feel like a dirty, dirty old woman who shouldn't be allowed near someone so hot. Ahem. )
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So I have been absent...
School is out, exams are finished and last night I had my final night with all my uni friends before they all disappear off back home for the summer. I'm sad. :( Today I'm back at work. That makes me a bit sad too because I'm exhausted and just want a break. :( I said goodbye to one friend last night...have a bit of a crush on him lol...and then cried in the dark the whole walk back to the train station. And then cried again when I got into bed. :(
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Well, with a name like that I'm guessing my latest follower would be a porn blog...
You are going to be SO disappointed -_-
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SCHOOOOOOL'S OUT FOR SUMMMMMMMMMER!
Finals are over and I'm so happy!
But now all my new friends will be scattering back off to their homes, some even in other countries... I'm sad that I'm gonna be lonely till September :(
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So yes, I'm very behind the times on this news, I know...but with school getting busier and more stressful etc I hadn't found time to watch the CTFxC vlogs as normal and went to look today and saw the news about Charles and Alli splitting and, well, broke my heart :( I'm not into all the hating bullshit, only they know what is best for them. I'm just sad because their love was something I always envied and looked up to, hoped one day to find. I'm sad they've lost that. :'(
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That moment when you're looking through a MMFD fanfics list for something to read and see a smut warning and your reaction is a simple...
'Aaaaand click...'
>_>
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The whole thing...killed me!!
Inside the eye of your mind: Chapter 65 (finale)
I just wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who has stuck with this little fic, I never imagined when I began writing a little drabble back in the day that it would turn in to this. I am incredibly proud of myself and incredibly humbled by all the amazing feedback it has received and all the people who have stuck by it, even when I went off on a random tangent. I love you all so much (getting a tad emotional here) so anyhoo, here it is, the last chapter. xxxxx
Chapter 65
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So this appeared and I made a slightly worrying noise when it did >_>
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The next chapter of Love and Chaos...
...is coming soon I promise! I have 2 exams next week and this week has been all about studying and catching up with friends so I've had to focus. My first exam is a five-hour statistics exam lol...I think I need to avoid writing the fic till that's done at least ;)
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REBLOG IF I CAN MESSAGE YOU AND VENT TO YOU. OR TO START A FRIENDSHIP.
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The crush messes with my mind, man. Being around him makes me feel like I'm 12 years old or something!
I went to see him today after everyone else had gone, he was with three of his mates; really laddish guys...the kind of guys I hate because they're too busy judging you to get to know you, the kind of lads I relate as like Big G and his gang in MMFD -_-
So he's there, with them and I'm thinking why am I here, while he says stuff about me that only he can somehow get away with because somehow it always makes me smile and I'm letting him because it's him even though I'm cringing because of the people he's saying it in front of. He can say that stuff, no one else can. I'm not a wuss, I will fight my corner when I need to.
And then he's looking at me with the eyes, those eyes jeez, they get all dark and moody but with this twinkle and this little smirk that I swear is just... urgh... and then he's hugging me, repeatedly, not just once, he's hugging me and then going off and then coming back again and again for more and his mates are being the kind of guys you imagine they'd be with that happening and I don't even care because it's nice to feel wanted for a little while.
And then he belched into my neck and smiled as he told me I look ugly with my glasses on and I kicked him in the shin and that was it.
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I'll just read the start of this fanfic, see if it's any good...
50 chapters later...
I need to stop and sleep. I have to go and study tomorrow and try not to end up spending the whole time being stupid around the new crush :\
If he strokes my hair again I may actually weep. -_-
blobwithagob, Inside the Eye of Your Mind is killing me with feels. I can't stop reading it. I must stop reading it...it's so hard to stop reading it!!!!
:O
#sucked into fanfic#god i love it#i miss mmfd#i could seriously cry thinking of how much I want a season 3.
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So fucking true :(
I was a normal fan. Then I found Tumblr.
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Happy days make me sad.
I know that makes no sense to anyone but me, but it's just kinda how it feels.
Yesterday I had a great day out visiting friends for a party/BBQ etc. Got 'home' just about midnight, well fed, well entertained and mostly sobered up....climbed into bed and felt overwhelmingly sad and today it's even worse.
Days out like that just make me so happy at the time, but then when I leave and come 'home' suddenly I see the stark difference of everything. I see how their lives are all full of joy and love and support, of smiles and laughter. I come 'home' and I spend my time either alone or being made to wish I was alone.
I rarely laugh unless I'm away from my 'home' life. I feel tired and sick most days that I'm around it. All I have here is someone trying to fill my world with all their bitterness and hatred and still expecting me to look after them.
It's not even home, it's just a place that I live. I've been searching for a home all my life.
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It's gone 3am, I have to be up in 6 hours and I've just spent like 3hrs reading this because I kept getting interrupted...all I can say however is, how the hell am I going to wait a whole WEEK for the next part?!?! OMG!! My mind has gone through so many options for the stalker...from Phillip, to Liam, to Mrs Dewhursts grandson, to Finn, to Archie, to Tom, to any man that ever existed in that world, to finally Rae herself and honestly, it could be all of them. Or none of them. I've even considered Karim or Kester! All I know is I just don't want it to be Rae lol! OMG. A WEEK!?!
Season 3 - Episode 6 - 'Lightning'
Season 3 - Episode 6 - Lightning
please read episode 1, 2, 3, 4 & 5 before reading this episode - thanks
friendly reminder to mobile users - read mores don’t work on mobiles. you’re in for a long scroll. sorry.
slowly getting through messages - you all rock!
cheers m’dears
xo
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