may-ihavesome-bubbletea

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

i think it’s a shame that in the process of “a million dollars but you have an immortal snail following you that will kill you if it touches you” becoming a mainstream concept we’ve lost part of the original prompt, which is that the snail receives a million dollars as well

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

I think "never kill yourself" is one of the funniest phrases to come out of the internet in recent times. Deeply silly but also captures the importance of experiences one might think frivolous or inconsequential.

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

this year… literally what the fuck was that <3

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

we need more divorcebaiting. how strongly can canon imply (without technically outright stating) that these two characters are bitterly, acrimoniously divorced? essential we explore this

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

fucking yes

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

Also, I am just going to say it:

If your CEO is so inconsequential to the success of your company that he can be gunned down in the street like a dog and it has absolutely no impact on your company whatsoever, maybe he doesn't actually need to be paid several hundred times as much as your median employee.

Maybe you could get away with, like, ten to fifteen times and spend the extra tens of millions of dollars you save on something else.

Just thinking out loud.

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

My friends and I used to do this thing where we'd dress up on a theme and go do something totally normal.

We dressed up as pirates and went bowling.

We dressed as vikings and went to the grocery store. The security guard told us we had to move our longship because it was illegally parked.

We dressed as Romans and went to Blockbuster. The staff chanted, "toga! Toga! Toga!" at us.

We dressed up all steampunk and went to the museum. Tourists kept taking our picture.

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

hey, uh. what the shit

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

The older generation's fixation on forcing you to have kids is something they absolutely refuse to unlearn. You can give the calmest and most reasonable explanation for not having kids and the only thing they can think to say is, "But what of the heir to the lands?" "Who will inherit the throne?" "Please sire upon your barren death there will be a parochial schism that will soak our soils with brother-blood." They literally hate to see you happy with just a cat.

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

i would've fucked so hard as a court jester in ye olde i would've jangled my balls and done a little dance and sang my silly tunes i'd be so good at my job. alas i have to be on tumblr instead which is like a poor imitation of it

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

wizard college is going to kill me I swear to god. I just saw someone without a component satchel reach into their pocket and pull out a handful of LOOSE tapioca to use as a substitute for blood in their fell ritual. and it worked. I've never been so fucking mad.

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

choose wisely

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

[may-ihavesome-bubbletea]

it must suck to do an assassinate and have everyone cheering you on and hyping you up cuz you can’t tell anyone you did it. you have to keep that information to yourself.