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lynderman · 2 years ago

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Neighbor!Finnick Odair who walks to and from school with you, eats lunch with you, and hangs out at your house, because he knows he's the only friend you have.

Best Friend!Finnick Odair who isn't seen in public without being glued to your side; the two of you doing any and everything together. One without the other never being an option.

Your Crush!Finnick Odair who's heartbroken at the sight before him; Your tear stained face and iron grip on him as you openly sob into his arms, begging and pleading for him to try and win the games he was reaped for. Crying that it isn't fair and you don't know what you would do without him. Forcing him to promise you he'll try his best and come back to you in one piece.

Tribute!Finnick Odair who's head echos day and night of your pained sobs; the thought of you crying and isolating in your room alone until the games are over because he knows you don't want to accept his fate. Mind foggy and all focus being driven on one goal. Coming back to you.

Victor!Finnick Odair who is the first person to knock on your bedroom door in the weeks he's been gone. Despite your groans and protests to be left alone, comes in. The mess of you and your room more than concerning to him. But all the concern leaves the second his eyes meet yours. Tears of joy pouring from both your eyes as you sprint into his arms, crying into his chest and asking how he did it. He says nothing, just holds you as close as he can. The horrors of the arena replaying in his head while he remembers his only motive was this. To have you in his reach again.

Boyfriend!Finnick Odair who firmly believes you are his sole salvation. Despite his frequent summons to the capitol, mentoring, capitol parties, he still makes time and effort for you. The only source of comfort being found in you. Your warm embrace when he runs a mile from victors village to your quiet cottage to try and rid himself of his nightmares. The smile that thins your lips every time you see him without fail. Constant hushes and whispers, telling him that he's safe now; he won't have to go to the arena ever again.

Mentor!Finnick Odair who is in pure shock and horror as your name is reaped for the hunger games; disbelief written on yours since it was your last year to even be reaped. The second you step foot into the justice building, he finds you and scoops you into his arms as you stand emotionless in them. He tells himself then and there that he will do anything he can to protect you. Whether that means making your district partner look bad, placing extra bets on you, even going so far as to get himself more...patrons just to sugarcoat and praise you in hopes of getting sponsors. Finnick tells you that you will be the victor of these games; promising you a life beyond this.

Sponsor!Finnick Odair who knows it's wrong, but bribes and places illegal bets on you to try and help you out in the arena. The risk of him getting caught increasing when sees an arrow shot at you, it landing in the side of your shoulder.

Fiancé!Finnick Odair who can't wait to propose to you. The moment you're out of the arena, healed by the medics, and allowed visitors, he rushes into your room and proposes. Of course there's no way to say no to him. Happily kissing him, you thank him for everything he's done for you; him smiling back and reminding you he always keeps his promises.

'Ex Fiancé'!Finnick Odair who defines the capitol by refusing to let you be a pawn in Snow's games like he was. The presidents' response being a demand of calling off the marriage; if he didn't you'd be killed.

Heartbroken!Finnick Odair who refuses to tell you everything that happened, only out of fear of what might happen to you. His entire world falling apart as he sees you go stoic and emotionless; knowing this is your way of shutting down. All the plans you had for the future were gone within a matter of seconds, you not even bothering to say a word to him before walking out his houses' door. Sinking into the couch, openly crying for the first time in years, Finnick Odair feeling as if he was back where everything started.

District Partner!Finnick Odair who hasn't seen you in 6 years. It being 6 years since he called off the engagement and you went to the capitol to train tributes before their games. The only reason you're face to face with him, shaking hands with him, on stage with him, is because you've both been reaped for the 3rd Quarter Quell.

Enemy!Finnick Odair (but its' really just one sided) who tries to talk and converse with you, but you refuse to even look in his direction unless it is of the upmost importance. He eventually retreats and watches from afar, reminiscing on what could have been if maybe he hadn't proposed then. The thoughts of how different things would be if he had been more patient and held off till you got back to district 4. Guilt and regret flooding his entire body as he firmly believes it was all his fault.

Training Partner!Finnick Odair who is beyond thrilled when you finally meet his gaze and speak a few words to him; even if it was just about your plan to stay alive in the arena. He notices the small smile on your lips as you walk away (maybe in embarrassment) after he compliments your ambition and technique in sparring.

Ally!Finnick Odair who's first move is to make sure you're safe and he knows where you are in the body of water placed in the center of the cornucopia. He sees you pillars over and the second the timers go off, he's swimming his way towards you.

Protective!Finnick Odair who kills 3 people in the midst of the bloodbath all because he thought they were on their way to kill you near the shore. When he reaches you, his body immediately holding yours and checking for wounds despite the protests you shout because he doesn't know if he'll be able to save you this year.

Reprieval!Finnick Odair who doesn't care about the hunger games or the blood on his hands. All he cares about is right now. That you're fast asleep on his shoulder, knocked out from exhaustion. It reminds him of when he did the same thing after his games; refusing to sleep unless it was right beside you. Katniss and him sharing a look as they eye both you and Peeta.

Belated!Finnick Odair who shouts in protest as you shove him away from Katniss the moment her arrow collides with the arena, electricity racking your body and sending you flying back. His own pain doesn't come to mind as he limps over to you, picking you up and holding you. He cries out in agony as he feels you lying unresponsive in his grasp; his body shaking as he violently sobs despite the crashing of the arena around him.

Finnick Odair who realizes that he could never feel death, but a world without you left him dying alive.

#Finnick Odair #the hunger games #THG #Finnick Odair x reader #the hunger games x reader #Hcs #Headcanons #hc #thg headcanons #Finnick Odair headcanons #Finnick Odair angst #angst #fluff #Finnick Odair fluff

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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Accusations (Finnick Odair)

TW: Mentions of prostitution

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Of course being a victor wasn't easy for Finnick and you took knowledge of that. He'd started having to mentor kids for the games when they happened so he'd leave you alone at the home while he took a train to the capitol for the duration of them. And he'd always come back looking exhausted. Eyes sunken, body trembling, the lack of sleep and basic self care evident in just about every part of him. The first 2 years he mentored neither of his tributes won and that struck something in him. Late at night when he couldn't sleep, you'd ask if he wanted to talk but he wouldn't respond. Just roll onto his side and look out the window. Times like these, you'd comfort him. Running your hands through his hair and tracing shapes onto his back until you heard his soft breaths as he drifted off to sleep; his chest rising and falling instead of shaking as usual.

Although at some point in time, things changed. Finnick was getting called to the capitol more often. He'd always kiss you goodbye when you left him at the train station. When asking him why he left, he'd say: "Victors meeting with Snow. He needs input on new areas, training-" blah blah blah. Whatever. And you believed him. Of course you would. Finnick Odair in the 10+ years you've known him and the 4+ years of dating him, has never once given you any reason to doubt him. He'd never been deceitful or a liar. Quite the opposite. And you know he'd never cheat on you. Anyone from district 4 could tell how starstruck the boy was with you, the same going for your feelings about him. You often laughed with him and indulged in the treats and gifts he'd be sent from the capitol by his 'secret admirers'.

On the day of his 18th birthday, he was brought to the capitol again by Snow. But today would be different. You and his own mentor from his games, Mags, a sweet elderly lady who was sadly mute, decided to surprise him in the capitol. She had pulled some strings, telling you it was about time you got to go with him and experience their lavish lifestyle even if it was just for a day. Yet the train ride took so long, you and Mags had arrived at the station late in the evening. You both found your way to the hotel Finnick was staying at; reassuring her that you'd find her in the morning when you saw him. So you snuck into his room and took the gift you'd kept in your pocket from out and set it on his nightstand. And you waited. And waited and waited patiently for your boyfriend to come back. It seemed like an eternity. It was 2:04 A.M when you checked the clock last. Just as you were about to give up and get your own room, you heard the door click and the lock unlatch. The smile on your face was huge. Finnick had always done so much for you despite being busy and caught up with the world of being a victor and you wanted nothing more than to do the same for him!

Jumping off the bed, you came around the corner as you heard the door shut and lock from the inside. "Happy birthday Fin-" All the excitement and glee left you as you took in the sight before you. Instead of your usual prim and proper boyfriend in his suit and tie he'd wear here or nice dress shirt, he practically naked. His buttoned up shirt was wrinkled and undone. Tie was no where to be found and his hair disheveled. His chest was covered in scratches and cuts. Eyes bloodshot and lips- His lips. They had purple Stains around them. Marks and shapes of another persons lips on them. You knew wore lipstick, let alone if you did it would not be that ugly shade. Arms falling to your side, you felt your stomach drop. "Fin-"

"What the hell are you doing here?" You were taken aback by his voice. His tone was cold and demanding, even rude. Not responding due to confusion, get got closer and asked again; louder and more aggressive. "I asked you what the hell you were doing here." With a gulp you looked at his eyes which were glaring at you with furrowed brows. "Mags and I- We took a train here. We wanted to surprise you for your-" "Yeah? Well you should've asked me first." You scoffed at him. "That wouldn't make it a surprise, Finny." His head snapped back to you at your sarcastic comment. Mumbling something under his breath he bumped into you as he walked past. "I love the surprise. So good to see you here. Happy birthday Finnick! I love you so much that I came up here and crossed a huge boundary with you out of my own self interest!" He said, mimicking you in a way he'd never used before. You didn't like it at all. He was being rude and dismissive after you put in so much effort to-

"Get your stuff and go to home." You paused and glanced at him. "I'm sorry?" "Thanks for the apology. Now go home. Get your shit and leave. Train station. I'll call and make an arrangement for-" "No." That one word made him turn around to face you fully, irritation written all over his face. "What'd you say?" "I said no." You snapped back standing your ground. He came from the bed and stood in front of you. "You don't get to be a dick to me after I came all the way up here to see you on your birthday. Especially not when you come back to the hotel room looking like this." Motioning your hands up and down you referred to his state. "It's not like I asked you to come here and do that." He said back. His words stung a bit. Finnick never was rude or dismissive like he is now. Clearly he was angry but you didn't know why. "I don't know why you're mad at me. If anything I should be mad at you. For fucks' sake it looks like you just went to a strip club or something!" Pausing, you eyed him up and down. "Is that why you're mad? Because I've caught you cheating on me? The Finnick Odair is mad because he's been put in his place as a lousy, cheating, lying, pathetic excuse of a boyfriend who-"

Your words were cut short when his fist went flying past you and into the wall beside you, barely missed your face by a mere inch. There was no point in looking at the damage he caused, knowing there was a hole set in place. His body was close against yours, pure and utter rage written all over his face and radiating off of him. "I have done everything to protect you. All of it. For you." You laughed. A loud and obnoxious laugh in his face. "For me? You've been coming up to the capitol for months, no- years, just to find some other girl to fuck cause you're done with me? C'mon Finny. If you wanted to break up with me this badly you could've just told me-" "Tell you what, huh? Tell you over dinner: 'Hey sweetheart! I've been going to the capitol on orders of President Snow every weekend 'cause if I don't he's going to kill you when I'm not home.'?" Your lips thinned, eyebrow raising in confusion. "Or maybe I should've waited till date night next week. Yeah, sounds like a better option. While we're walking down the street just tell you that I come up here to do his bidding and whatever he asks of me!"

"Finn-"

"Oh, no. no. Perhaps I wait till our anniversary next month. Y'know. While we're in bed, doing the do, I lean in real close, kiss you, and tell you that I've been fucking other people in the capitol because I have to. Because to them, I'm desirable." By now Finnick had left his position of cornering you in the wall. He was pacing in circles, hands in his hair as he tugged at the golden strands. "Finnick, what're you-" Out of no where, he grabs a nearby lamp and throws it against the window, glass shattering and getting everywhere making you shout. Grabbing things left and right, he begins to toss them around, breaking everything in sight. The remotes, the tables, the glasses. Any and everything in his way is gone and destroyed with a matter of seconds. He punches the walls, he punches the mirrors to the point where glass cuts his knuckles and blood seeps out and onto the white carpet beneath his feet. And you do nothing. You stand there in complete shock. Shock of seeing your boyfriend; The sweet, loving boyfriend who breaks and tears everything apart. The same boyfriend who has never been violent outside of the 65th hunger games. The boyfriend who has never once rose his voice at you or done anything even remotely disgraceful or disrespectful towards you. His eyes lock on yours and he slowly walks over, towering over you as sweat drips down his forehead.

"How do I go about telling you, huh? HUH?!" He draws closer to you again, his words long and dragged out until the last word. That last 'huh' he shouts. At you. Directly at you; making you flinch at the volume. "HOW THE HELL DO I TELL YOU? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY TO YOU?!" As he shouts, you see the anger leave his posture, his body, his face, all at the first tear that falls down your cheek. As much as you hate to admit it, you're scared. You've never seen Finnick act so hostile nor yell at anyone. Especially you. All of the anger is replaced by guilt and regret as he sighs. "I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I just-" He stops talking midway and gives a shaky exhale, a signal that he himself is holding back tears. His body slumps and he sinks to the floor out of pure exhaustion, you following suit and crawling in between his legs. His hands grip his dress pants so tightly his bloodied knuckles turn white. "Finnick.." Your hand come up to hold his cheek and for the first time in years, you see your boyfriend cry. Hot tears flow out of his eyes and flood his face as they coat your hand. His body trembles and you feel it shake against your own. Breath ragged, all he can do is let out choked and incoherent sobs. Broken sobs that make you want to cry for him.

Your heart aches as you see your once confident and put-together boyfriend break down beneath you. His cries echo throughout the room and you swear you've never felt this much pain in your life as you can do nothing more but hold him. Cradle him in your arms like a baby on the bloodied carpet as his tears stain your neck. Shushing him, you try and get his breathing back on track; and after a few minuets he isn't borderline hyperventilating anymore. When you feel his heart beat slow down you raise his head from yours and hold it in both your hands. "You don't have to tell me but at least-"

"Snow sells me for my-body." He pauses. "He has since I turned 16. That's why I come up here so often. I've b-been considered 'desirable' by the capitol citizens. The f-first time he asked I said no and he let me go home. But-" He has to pause to stop himself from choking on sobs again; contrary as your own tears began to fall at his words. "A month later he brought me back and told me if I said no again, he'd-" Another pause. Yet this time he looked at you. His sad and swollen eyes seemed to look at you with such adoration it made your hear sink more. "He'd kill you." He pulled you closer to his chest as he ran his hands up and down your arms. "And I c-can't lose you. You're the only one- The only person I-" "Finnick, stop." You couldn't bear to hear him go one. Hearing why he was here so often broke your heart. The thought of him coming up here to spare your life made you feel bad. Even worse when you'd just accused him of cheating minuets earlier. With a sigh you placed a small and gentle kiss on his lips.

"I'm sorry I accused you of cheating. I was upset and- I don't even have a reason to be upset at you, mines' stupid. But I'm sorry that you've done this for so long. You don't deserve to be treated like this, you're not their property. You deserve so much better, love." If it was possible he pulled you closer, his hands holding onto you for dear life. "No one's ever gonna touch you again, I promise. We're gonna find a way out of this. I won't let anything happen to you, ok?" He said nothing; you squeeze his hands over your hips before helping him off the floor and into the bathroom. As he sat on the toilet you poured water onto a towel and began to dab at his wounds. Leaning down ever so slightly, Finnick gives you a peck with a small smile. "I love you." He whispers. "I love you too, Finn."

#Finnick Odair #Finnick Odair x reader #angst #the hunger games #thg #Finnick Odair angst #the hunger games x reader #fanfic #fanfics #Fic #hunger games

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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My Current/In Progress Works

This is the page where I'll type out my current ideas or requests from people ( when I get some :| )

My Ideas/Works !

Finnick Odair ! (THG)

·˚ ༘ Accusations || Finnick Odair x Girlfriend!Reader || Angst to Fluff || 2.7k+ Words, 4/3/23 ||

The trip you took to the capitol to surprise your boyfriend didn't go as you expected it to.

·˚ ༘ Finnick Odair x Fem!Reader || Angst ||

No one said being apart of the rebellion would be easy. But you had assumed with the help of your best friend, Finnick, it might be. Oh how wrong you were.

·˚ ༘ Finnick Odair x Deceased!Fem!Reader || Angst || From Finnicks’ POV ||

“I could never feel death, but a world without you left me dying.” Weeks after the rebellion ended, Finnick finally has a chance to grieve the loss of his wife.

·˚ ༘ Finnick Odair x District 12!Fem!Reader || Undecided ||

You wished you had listened to Father, Haymitchs’ warnings about the new victor. Maybe if you did, you wouldn’t have wound up in the capitol for an extended amount of time.

·˚ ༘ Finnick Odair x Fem!Reader || Fluff ||

Ever since you won your games, you’d had a difficult time adjusting back to reality. Finnick sees much of his younger self in you and is determined to not let you go down the same path that he did.

Haymitch Abernathy ! (THG)

·˚ ༘ Haymitch Abernathy x Fem!Capital!Reader || Slow-Burn/Angst ||

You agreed to take over Effie’s job for the games this year due to her having some health problems. Almost immediately, you wish that you were the one bedridden and away from this place.

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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My Discontinued/Finished Works

The Black Phone

Robin Arellano !

·˚ ༘ Glimpse Of Us || 8 Part Series|| x Female!Reader || 8/6/22 - 8/9/22

You and Robin had been dating for quite a while. It all went downhill When he began to get into fights again. A bit later, you get with someone else. How will Robin handle seeing you with someone who isn't him?

·˚ ༘ Us Against The World || 2 Part Series (Never Finished) || Robin Arellano x Female! Reader || 8/18/22

Weeks after your boyfriend Robin Arellano went missing, you still refused to stop searching for him. One day, continuing the search for him, you soon find out where he went.

·˚ ༘ Wishes || 2.7k+ Words || Finney Blake x Robin Arellano || 8/26/22

Robin knew he never stood a chance against Donna.

·˚ ༘ Finn Song Correlation || 4 Part Series || Finney Blake x Robin Arellano ||

Vance Hopper !

·˚ ༘ Why Not me? || 3 Part Series || Vance Hopper x Female!Reader || 8/10/22 - 9/2/22

Vance could break every girl's heart and not bat an eye. So why was breaking yours so much harder for him?

Bruce Yamada !

·˚ ༘ Futile Feelings || 800+ Words || Bruce Yamada x Female!Reader || 10/10/22

'Futile: Incapable of producing any useful result; pointless'. Much like your relationship with your boyfriend. Bruce Yamada.

Wednesday (Netflix Series)

Xavier Thorpe !

·˚ ༘ A For Effort || 2-3 Part Series || Xavier Thorpe x Female!Reader || 12/9/22 - 1/5/22

You’ve always been 2nd place. First place for losers. Attending Nevermore was supposed to change that.

#masterlist #fanfic #works #fanfics #list of works #the black phone #robin Arellano #finney blake #vance hopper #bruce yamada #the black phone fanfic #x reader #shifting #Wednesday #Wednesday Netflix #Xavier Thorpe

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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RIP Lucerys Velaryon. You would’ve loved Among us.

#hotd #lucerys targaryen #sobbing rn #among us #I think I’m funny for this #house of the dragon

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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Yes hes horrible but have you considered that he has a cute smile

#factual #he’s just so baby girl

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙂𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝘼𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙 𝘾𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝘼𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙 (Xavier Thorpe)

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x Fem!Addams!Reader

Word Count: 438

Date Published: 1/5:22

Synopsis: Xavier wonders about what could’ve been if he hadn’t sized you up so quickly.

A/N: Just an extra part I decided to add :)

Part 1

Part 2

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“And it was a pleasure to have my heart broken by you.” All the tears I held in my eyes escaped without fail. If I knew that those were the last words (Y/n) ever spoke to me, I would have her tell them to me again.

After that day in the quad things weren’t the same. The semester continued and so did my guilt. Immense amounts of it filling me each and every time I saw her. It could be anywhere. At the Weathervane in Jericho, the dock at the lake, even the botany classroom. But when I saw her with Ajax the guilt was replaced with regret. Gut wrenching, agonizing, regret. Knowing if I’d only been a better friend. A better person to her. It would be me she smiled at. It would be me holding and dancing with her at the Rave’N. It would be me who made her feel loved. Looking back at, she was right. Not once did I ever account for her feelings. I always just cared about mine. ‘You don’t know what you’ve lost until it’s gone’. Is something my father once said. He was right too.

I didn’t know how much I’d lost until she was gone. There were no more weekends spent in my shed painting and blasting music. No more lunch ‘dates’ to the restaurants in Jericho as she’d call them. I had no one to comfort me or make me feel better about stuff that was going on. I missed it. What we did have and what could’ve been. It hurt. Every day, every night. Memories of us playing on loop in my head, always ending with her smile. The last one I saw laced with sympathy and pity for me.

But time went on, and I stayed the same. If it was even possible she began to drift away even more. I’d never felt more alone. Despite my countless drawings, writings, camera roll, anything. There was nothing for me to do. She didn’t avoid me. No, she just didn’t acknowledge me. Smiles, head nods, nothing. Yet I still waited for the day when she would come back to me and tell me: “I will always love you.” Lonely and forgotten, never thinking she’d look my way. And she’d smile and hold me just like she used to do. Like she loved me. Back when she did love me. However, I knew it’d never happen. I would never get her back no matter how hard I tried because I simply didn’t put in enough effort.

And even though I can’t have her heart, she will always have mine.

𝘼 𝙁𝙤𝙧 𝙀𝙛𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩 (Xavier Thorpe) Pt.2

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x Fem!Addams!Reader

Word Count: 3.6k+

Date Published: 12/30/22

Synopsis: Your cousin was right. You were nothing more than a fool with a extremely slow heart. Each day proved that in itself.

A/N: (TW) for mentions of weed. The way I portray the characters in this part isn’t canon nor is the timeline so don’t get mf butthurt <3 (I also decided to be cheesy at the end so don’t say anything.)

Part 1

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I groaned in frustration as I paced my room. In the past hour I’d turned the dorm upside down trying to find my notebook. It wasn’t in my bookshelf, it wasn’t in my nightstand, and it wasn’t in my bathroom drawer. When I decided to double check my satchel again, to my shock I did find a notebook! Only it wasn’t mine. Opening the cover I saw the initials: X.T. “You stopped bitching! Does that mean you found it?” Yoko shouted from her closet. “No. But I have Xavier’s sketchbook instead.” That sure got her attention. Slamming the doors shut she rushed over and took it out of my hands, flipping through the pages. “I must’ve grabbed it by mistake when I er- Stormed off?” A slight smirk tugged at her lips as she stopped on a page. “This would be the perfect time for me to tell you to ‘forget about him’ again. But-“ Stopping mid sentence she flipped his book around to show me a drawing.

A drawing of me.

Intrigued, I felt an unwanted feeling of happiness. Taking the book from her hand I studied it carefully. The portrait was overly detailed but so dead on. From the slight curve of my nose to the one uneven hair in my eyebrow, he’d drawn small details of me that I hadn’t even recognized about myself. A bit of charcoal coated my finger when I ran it over the page, smudging it slightly. Yoko took the book back and continued flipping before I could finish examining it. “Holy shit. He has so many..” “Really?” The slight excitement in my voice caught me off guard. I refrained myself from looking through with her. That would just be more pain in inflicting on myself. Even if he did have some work of me, I bet that there was quadruple that of Wednesday.

When Yoko finished looking through them she turned back and handed me the book. “So when are you going to give it back to him?” Laughing, I stuffed the book back into my satchel. “Are you kidding? There’s no way I’ll give it to him in person. What am I supposed to say? ‘Hey Vi. After practicality confessing my undying love and affection for you and you throwing me under the bus like everyone else in my life, I took your sketchbook by mistake.’ No! He’ll think I did it on purpose or something just so I could make this more about myself or some shit!” She went back to drinking her tomato juice, shaking her head. “Then how the hell are you going to give it back to him?” My gaze focused on the clock above our door, the time being 4:00. “I’ll find a way. Maybe give it to Kent or some shit? It’s something I’ll deal with later. I don’t have time for this.” Before my roommate had the chance to ask where I was going, I grabbed my bag and slammed the door trying to avoid anymore unwanted questions.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“4:20. On the dot.” Ajax turned to face me from a tree deep in the forest with a smirk. “I would’ve been here earlier if it Weren’t for yoko.” Slumping down beside him, he handed me a newly rolled blunt. “Why? What’d she do now? Spill another bottle of her juice on you? That’d explain the poor clothing choices today.” He laughed as i elbowed him. “No. She was going through Xavier’s sketchbook and found drawings of me so I looked through some and got a bit caught up.” We fell into silence before I took a long hit. “Have you talked to him? Or Wednesday? You are family so It’d be better to-“ I cut him off as I placed my index finger to his lips. “Can we not talk about this right now? I didn’t come out this deep into the forest to talk about my relationship drama.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

I did in fact start talking to Ajax about my relationship drama. Only because I was high off my ass. One minute we talked about Weems and her new office couch, then it escalated to us talking about our failed attempts at thornhill’s class, lastly it ended with me sobbing to him about Xavier. “I mean seriously Jax, what does he see in her? I’ve known her my entire life and she doesn’t have anything I don’t! Other than not having a heart but still. Every time she shows up I’m just replaced. First at home and now here. It’s not fair and it never will be.” My head rested on his shoulder as rain began to pour on us. “Are you-“ “Yes. I’m sorry- If I could stop it, I would. This same shit happened when I left the other day. I wanna forget about him Y’know? Maybe he only ever started befriending me cause he knew she would come because of one of his dreams or some shit?” Rambling only seemed to make the rain worse but Ajax didn’t seem to care. He nodded and listened to every word I said, occasionally giving his input.

“For once in my life I just want to be someone’s first choice. Not a rebound or replacement for Wednesday.” The intensity of the rain died down when I felt my crying stop. Deciding I’d wallowed in my self pity enough and dragging Ajax into it, I took my head off of his shoulder. “Are you leaving?” “Yeah. I think I’ve cried enough today to make a river.” He laughed before intertwining his hand with mine which caught me off guard. “(Y/n).” Our eyes met and I didn’t know if it was the weed or if I hadn’t noticed how attractive Ajax was before. “You aren’t Xavier’s first choice.” His words hit me like a brick, my mouth literally falling open. “We both know that. He sees something in Wednesday and not you.” My hand left his before he could even finish the sentence. “Way to rub salt in the wound,Jax.” The rain started to pour again mainly focusing on him. “Fuck, no. That’s not what I meant!” He ran his hands over his eyes with a groan. “Then what did you mean? Are you gonna sit here and tell me that I’m never going to be good enough for anyone or-“ His lips met mine; hands moving to cup my face. I was a bit too stunned to speak, not even bothering to kiss him back. In fact, I pulled away. With a face full of hurt he frowned. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I thought that maybe you’d finally give me a chance since Xavier fucked everything up but now I have and you’re not going to want to see me again after this and you’ll hate me and-“ “Just shut up and kiss me again.” A smile spread across his face as he did.

It felt surreal to say the least. The fact that I’d finally gotten a kiss that I do desperately longed for. Even if it wasn’t from Xavier, it was still from someone. Ajax was a pretty good kisser too so it must’ve been a Win-Win scenario. When he finally needed to catch his breath we parted ways; Him quite literally panting. Silence overcame us again when we locked eyes. I guess I’d been too infatuated with Xavier to really acknowledge Ajax. How he always had a slight smile on his face, eyes that seemed to look into my soul but in a good way, or the way his left eyebrow seemed to arch up more when he gets excited, like now. I decided to break the silence, but not the way I intended to. “Enid and you aren’t a thing? Because If you are then I’m gonna feel like shit about this later.” Instead of reacting like I anticipated, he laughed with a head shake. “No. If we were, I wouldn’t have done that. Believe me, I’d never stoop that low. The beginning of the semester we had a talk and she uhm-“ Rubbing the back of his neck he looked around like he was making sure no one was around. “She came out to me. Told me over the summer break she found out she didn’t like guys, If you get what I’m saying.” My jaw practically hit the tree trunk below us. Enid? Gay? Well, I may have had some suspicions but I just thought she was a hopeless romantic. “Yeah, that’s what I thought too. We’re cool now though. It’s not something I can get mad over. Not like I would to begin with. She even told me about her and Wednesday having a date night last week. They went to the cemetery to crash an obituary.”

That does sound like something Wednesday would do. But not the date thing. “You sure it was a date?” He nodded again. “Yeah. I mean, If she ended up kissing Wednesday and not being put 6 feet under? I’d call that a date.” Flabbergasted was the only word to describe how I felt. Not only did Enid not get threatened by her but she even got within 6 inches of her? That’s insane. After a moment of thinking about everything and connecting the dots I came to a conclusion. It wasn’t hard or a bad one, just a bit difficult for me to believe. “So let me get this straight. You liked Enid, as in last tense. But she’s lesbian and she likes Wednesday. And Wednesday also likes Enid so they’re sort of a thing? But Xavier liked Wednesday but he doesn’t know she likes Enid so he’s just chasing after her for no reason? And now you’re telling me you’ve liked me for how long..?”

“A while. ‘Dunno the exact date but sometime in the summer, maybe July? When we all met up for the trip to the beach. I guess when you and I stayed at the bonfire after Xavier left with Bianca or some shit. That’s when I got to know the real you? It sounds so cheesy but after that and when we started hanging out more I got a bit jealous of him. How even after him going back and forth with Bianca or now the whole fiasco with your cousin you still wanted to be with him. He’d ditch you constantly, stand you up, and make so many excuses, yet you trailed behind him again in hopes he’d give you a couple seconds of his attention. All those times you’d sit alone in the quad or during botany, it kinda hurt to see you so upset over some dude who doesn’t give two shits about you. And I’ve wanted to ask you out for a while, or to the Rave’N but you didn’t even go! Enid told me you were sitting in your room sulking over Xavier again so I feel like anything I said would’ve been irrelevant.” I couldn’t tell if he was mad or upset as he spoke; The arch in his eyebrow furrowing. “The point I’m trying to get to is you deserve better. So much better. Someone like Xavier isn’t worth your time if he won’t spare you a second glance. That’s why I asked if you wanted to hang out tonight. Maybe it was the weed or just how sad you looked, just I wanted to tell you how I feel now. Not wait until Xavier messes shit up again. That’s why I kissed you, that’s why I’m rambling about all of this now. Obviously it’s way too soon to ask you out but I think- No. I know I could be a better boyfriend or just friend than he ever will be. So will you maybe possibly consider going on a date with me? Not now, this doesn’t count.”

I wanted to throw myself off a bridge. Not because of how sweet he was being or how he’s now telling me everything. But because of how blind I was being. Over the past few months I’ve been treating Ajax the way Xavier is treating me and it clearly must’ve hurt him as much as me, if not more. The fact it took someone else confessing their feelings for me to realize that I’ve deserve better than some borderline player makes me feel bad about myself. But Ajax is right. I do deserve better. And I feel more confident that he could treat me better then Xavier. “I’m sorry that you felt like whatever you’d say to me wouldn’t matter because that’s not true. It does. And a lot more than anything Xavier could say too. I’m glad that you finally said something. So yes. I’d be more than happy to go on a date with you.” I watched the anticipation leave his body when he slumped against the tree. “I’m really glad you said yes. Otherwise I would’ve had to stone you and just hope you’d forget about this conversation.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Over the next few weeks Ajax and I were almost inseparable. We’d spend most afternoons in the forest watching the fish in the lake or watching movies on his phone. Unlike someone, he took an interest in my music and songs. I’d tried to reach him how to play the violin but he didn’t get any further than holding it and even that wasn’t something he was good at. Enid had approached me and showed her blog which had a photo of the two of us eating lunch together. She thought it was great that he’d decided to tell me how I felt and that I got over Xavier. Laughing, I brushed it off and smiled at her before saying the same thing about her and Wednesday. She wasn’t as surprised as I thought she’d be, happy even. “I’m glad that you know. Wednesday would never admit it to anyone but she lets me braid her hair after she showers. Oh! Speaking of her; Did you ever talk to her about- Everything?” She circled her hands questionably and I figured she was talking about what happened at the lake. “Yeah, I did. But you know Wednesday. Not one for conversations. She did apologize, just in her own way.”

It was true. The two of us did talk it over at the Weathervane last Sunday. She explained that she told Xavier after I stormed off about her and Enid; Him being too stunned to speak. Also on how she said that he should try to set shit straight with me too since I cared so much about him. No other details were shared about what he said. We just made amends and I made my way back to Nevermore. “That’s great! I’m so proud of her for actually listening to what I said. Anyways, I gotta go check up on thing and make sure she didn’t lock him in the desk again. Meet you in fencing later?” I have her a thumbs up and she skipped away, leaving me alone in the quad. There wasn’t anyone here other than a few werewolves and one of Ajax’s friends. I’d tried really hard to push any and every thought of Xavier out of my head but talking with Enid just provoked them again. Not to mention he still had my book. Yoko had given him his back, saying she found it in the library. Which was a lie. He’d tried to talk to me in the halls or in our shared classes but I still couldn’t face him. For more than one reason. The main being that I didn’t want to. The hopes of all of this dying down and fading into nothing disappeared all together when said boy sat down in front of me.

“Hey.” Dread filled me as he spoke. His usual loud and assertive voice now quiet and a barely audible. I nodded my head at him before grabbing my bag. “Don’t leave.” I didn’t listen, only putting my phone and jacket in quicker. Only when he grabbed my hand did I stop. As much as I hate to admit it, he still had a slight hold on me. Mentally and physically as of now. Slumping back down he gave me a half hearted smile. “Can we talk?” No response. “Ok well, you don’t have to talk. I will. Just let me explain.” Explain what? What is there for him to try and explain? “First, I have your book.” That got my attention. He handed me my book and I flipped through the pages. It’s not like he’d ever write or vandalize it but I just wanted to make sure. “You’re songs are pretty good. I like the one in red writing.” “The one about you? That sounds pretty egotistical, even for you. Not like that’s out of the ordinary anymore since you’re so self centered.” He looked down and cleared his throat. “Please. Just let me talk-“

“About what? What is there to talk about other than you only now approaching me when you finally realized you didn’t have a chance with Wednesday? When she finally tells you that her feelings don’t reciprocate yours, or just because she likes girls only then do you come crawling back to me? This happens again and again. First with Bianca. Each fight you had you’d come to me and and tell me about how you wish she’d treat you better or you hope someone would care more about you. And I’d sit on your bed and tell you that there is someone who does you and you just weren’t listening. And you still don’t! Over and over and over I would watch as you got ‘played’ by girls. All this time I’ve been watching and waiting for you to open your fucking eyes and see that it was me. I’m the one who would reassure you after any minor inconvenience that happened to you. Fights with your dad, Bianca, anyone! And you’d hug me and thank me for being a good friend. I wanted to be more than friends!”

“We still can be. If you’ll just-“

“No. We can’t. Maybe if you decided to approach me sooner or noticed I’d been waiting for you to say something for over a year, then yes. We could’ve been more than friends! Now we can’t. I’m glad you’ve come to your senses and see that I do care about you, just only as a friend now and I appreciate it, really. But not everything is about you. You can’t count on other people’s feelings to correlate with yours. It’s not fair! And it isn’t fair that you’re deciding to tell me this after you got rejected by a lesbian.” Out of the corner of my eye I could see Ajax walking towards me despite Xavier being here. Only when he saw him did he say something. “Am I interrupting something? This seems a bit personal-“ “Ajax, can you go? This doesn’t concern you.” The way Xavier was talking to him made me a bit mad, especially the tone. “No, it does concern him.” Xavier asked why as he sat down next to me. “Because we’re dating.” Both of them looked at me in shock. I didn’t want to make it official or anything before this conversation but, oh well. “(Y/n), please-“

“No. This isn’t how this works. You don’t get to tell me who I can or can’t like. It’s been long enough to talk about this and you need to wrap your head around the fact that I don’t like you anymore. I gave you everything, Xavier. But not once did you ever consider my feelings in anything. But Ajax does. He was there every time you screwed me over or when you blew me off. He asks about my music, my interests, my hobbies. Everything you didn’t do, he does.” His hand found mind, squeezing it. We sat in silence before Ajax asked if I wanted to leave to which I agreed. “Thank you for giving me my book back and-“

“I’m sorry.” Unwanted guilt filled me with those 2 words. Looking at Xavier, I could see tears filled his eyes and his leg shook under the table. It took so long for him to apologize for everything so why did I feel bad? I didn’t do anything wrong. Right? “I’m sorry for the way I treated you. You were right. I should’ve been a better friend and kept your feelings and actions accounted for. Maybe if I did we wouldn’t be where we are now.” A cold breeze filled the quad as I let go of Ajax’s hand, walking next to Xavier. It hurt a lot to see him like this. But it hurt more to know that only now when I was with someone else did he care. “I’m sorry too Xavier. That it had to end this way.” I gripped his hand, a sympathetic smile curving my lips. “And It was a pleasure to have my heart broken by you.” His bottom lip trembled as tears poured down his face. I let go of his hand and followed Ajax out of the quad. I refused to cry, it wasn’t worth it anymore. All those countless nights I spent sobbing my eyes out over him led to this. Strong arms wrapped around me, pulling me into a hug. We stood there for a while; My head on his chest as he played with my hair. In the corner of my eye I could see Xavier sitting alone in the quad now. Crying without shame as he let his hair crowd his face.

If only he mustered up the courage to tell me sooner. Than maybe he wouldn’t have to deal with the pain of seeing me with someone else.

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Tag-List:

@nicolewithanee @eringaitskill @iloveme-123 @chimsblogg @myworldgoesboomz @lilsunshine1092 @hawkins-hs @merakiaes @littlemissvamp @callmestorm0987 @sophiaj650 @happycrushperoiniiyakans-blog @mrswang17 @captainalyss @psychobitchsthings @sarcastic-sourwolf @luna670 @ciaraguy9 @hesvoid3434 @bookwormstrawberry @starstruckfangirls

#Xavier Thorpe #Wednesday #Netflix #x reader #xavier thorpe x you #angst #sidepart #xavier thorpe x reader

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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I’m begging, on my knees, pleading. If anyone finds any angst w Xavier please tag me bro.

#Wednesday #Netflix #angst #Xavier Thorpe #fanfic #x reader #xavier thorpe x reader

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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OMG THIS FIC ALMOST MADE ME CRY THIS IS SO GOOD😭😭 I was wondering if there's going to be a part 2 for that fic or...

THANK YOU SO MUCH! I’m glad you like my writing. But I just posted part 2 If you wanna go check it out! :))

#asks #part2 #Wednesday #xavier thorpe x you #xreader #fanfic #Xavier Thorpe #Netflix #xavier thorpe x reader

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lynderman · 2 years ago

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𝘼 𝙁𝙤𝙧 𝙀𝙛𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩 (Xavier Thorpe) Pt.2

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x Fem!Addams!Reader

Word Count: 3.6k+

Date Published: 12/30/22

Synopsis: Your cousin was right. You were nothing more than a fool with a extremely slow heart. Each day proved that in itself.

Part 1

Extra Blurb

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A drawing of me.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“We still can be. If you’ll just-“

If only he mustered up the courage to tell me sooner. Than maybe he wouldn’t have to deal with the pain of seeing me with someone else.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Tag-List:

#angst #Wednesday #xavier thorpe #Netflix #x reader #xavier thorpe x you #Wednesday Addams #xavier thorpe x reader #reader insert #part 2 #ajax petropolus #yoko tanaka

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