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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Pairing: Christian Maddox x reader (Motorheads)

Genre: fluff, romance

Warnings: none

A/n: this was requested!! This ones long!

Don't think, just drive

You didn't think anyone noticed. The way you walked past the student parking lot everyday, even when it rained, even when the weight of your bag left red lines on your shoulders. Even when your old but perfectly decent car sat at the curb, untouched. But Christian Maddox noticed. He always did.

"Hey." He called out one afternoon, casually leaning against his car with the easy confidence of someone who'd been born behind the wheel. "You allergic to engines or just committed to the cardio?" You stopped mid step. "What..?" He pointed his chin toward your car, parked down the the street like a forgotten thought.

"Saw you walk by again. That car of yours got ghosts in it, or...?" You rolled your eyes, trying to walk off. But he fell into step beside you, boots scuffing against the pavement. "You scared to drive?" You stopped. His voice wasn't mocking. Not really. Not like the others. He said it like he'd seen it before. Like he got it. "I just... never really learned." You muttered, trying to sound casual. "My uncle left me the car, but I didn't grow up around this stuff."

Christian gave a slow, thoughtful nod. "Well, that's a crime." You blinked. "What is?" He smirked, looking you up and down-not in a sleazy way, but like he was assessing you. Like you were a car that just needed a tune up. "Letting that machine sit there unloved. She deserves the road, so do you."

You squinted. "And what? You're gonna teach me?" He shrugged. "Unless you want Logan to do it.. but he's a little intense." You cracked a small smile. "Alright, one lesson. If I die, I'm blaming you." He grinned, stepping backwards towards his car. "If you die, at least you won't be walking."

That Sunday, he took you too the empty lot behind an old grocery store that had burned down when he was a kid. "No one's ever going to come back here." He said, throwing the keys into your lap. "So relax, you can only embarrass yourself in front of me." You sat stiff behind the wheel, fingers gripping it like a life raft. "Okay." He said, voice softer now. "Let's start with just feeling it. No gas yet. Just let the clutch out slow."

You stalled. Twice. Christian didn't laugh. He leaned across you, his arm brushing yours as he gently adjusted your grip. "Loosen up, you're not wrangling it. You're dancing with it." "That's stupid." You muttered. "That's poetry." He shot back, smirking. "Now, try again." This time the car rolled forward, and didn't die. You gasped like you had just won a race. "I did it!"

Christian's smile went fill tilt, eyes shining under that messy blonde hair. "Hell yeah you did, you're a natural." You glowed. You didn't even mean to, but you did.

After an hour, the car was off and the sun was low. You were sitting on the hood, sweat clinging to your back, laughter still in your throat. "Why do you even care?" You asked, tipping your head back to look at him. "Why help me?" Christian paused. He had his way of going quiet like he heard something you couldn't.

He paused. "'Cause I know that not everyone has somebody to teach them. I got lucky with my brother. And now you got lucky with me." You softly smiled at that. "You just gotta figure it out. Trial and error." He said. "And what if I'm all error..?" He met your gaze, his voice a little rough around the edges now. "Then I'll stay in the passenger seat until your not."

Your heart fluttered stupidly in your chest. And he must've noticed, because he looked away with a shy smile, like maybe he wasn't as fearless as he pretended to be.

The drive out of town was quiet. Your knuckles were white on the steering wheel, shoulders drawn so tight if felt like you couldn't breathe all the way in. The windows were cracked open just enough to let in the late evening wind, cool air brushing against your neck, your face, your nerves. You weren't even sure how Christian had convinced you again. All you remembered was him showing up at your door with that calm infuriating grin, and saying. "If you're going to be scared, at least do it with me in the car."

Now, here you were. A stretch of empty road. Trees blurring into green tunnels. You at the wheel. Him beside you. And a weight in your chest that hadn't been lifted. "I shouldn't be this bad at it." you said, voice low. "You're not bad." Christian said, shifting slightly in his seat, eyes scanning the road. "You're just scared."

You glanced at him. "Isn't that the same thing?" His head shook once. "Not even close." You stalled again. The car jolted, and the engine cut off with a pathetic cough. You flinched, heart in your throat. Christian didn't say anything. Just leaned forward, turned the key, and brought it back to life. "You alright?" He asked softly. You nodded, even though your hands were trembling. He noticed. Of course he did.

"I used to be scared too." He said, like it was some kind of secret. "Didn't even wanna sit in the drivers seat after Logan crashed my dad's old Chevy trying to teach me. I was twelve. Thought the whole thing was cursed." You lightly scoffed. "You? Scared?" He half laughed. "Terrified."

There was something oddly comforting about that. The idea of him, with his wild confidence and his stupid fast car, once being frozen in the same place you were now. "I don't know why it gets to me like this." You admitted with a sigh, fingers flexing on the wheel. "It's just.. It feels like if I mess up, even a little, it all goes wrong, fast." Christian's voice lowered, quieter now. "That's not just driving talking, is it?" You didn't answer, you didn't have to.

Later, when you finally managed to shift into second and keep going, it felt like unlocking something in your own chest. The engine didn't stall, the tires didn't scream. You were just moving. That was all. And somehow, that was everything.

You felt Christian watching you, but he didn't say anything until you parked. You were still breathing hard, adrenaline curling in your lungs. "I didn't think I could do it." You said, staring at your own hands. "I thought I'd panic, like always." "But you didn't." He said softly. "You kept going.."

You turned your head to look at him, and he wasn't smiling like he usually did. He looked serious. Like this meant something to him too. "Y'know." He said. "Most people think strength is about not being scared. But it's not. It's about doing it anyway. Even when you are."

You stared at him, the words settling deep. Familiar in a way that made your chest ache. "I don't feel strong.." you whispered. He reached out, slow, careful, like giving you a chance to pull away, and placed his hand over yours on the gear shift. "You don't have to feel it." He said. "You already are." The car was off. The windows open. The whole world felt still.

And for a second you didn't think about the fear, or the car, or how close his hand was. You just breathed. And you didn't let it go.

The next time you drove, it was your idea. You caught Christian by surprise after school, standing by his car with your keys in hand and your heart thudding like it wanted out of your chest. "Wanna go for a drive?" You asked. His eyebrows lifted. A smile tugged slow at the corner of his mouth. "Look who's getting brave." You rolled your eyes. "I'm still scared." "Good." He nodded. "Means you'll respect the road."

And maybe you'd never say It out loud, but you trusted him-more than anyone. With the silence, with the fear, with the fragile way your heart held itself together. You ended up back on the road neither of you knew the name of. The kind of place maps forgot, with trees taller than houses and birds cutting through the sky like they had somewhere more important to be. This time, you drove farther. This time, you didn't stall once.

And this time, when you parked at the top of a hill, engine cooling with slow clicks, you didn't rush to break the quiet. Christian sat beside you, one arm draped out of the open window, wind tugging at the loose strands of hair falling across his forehead. He looked...relaxed. More than usual. Until you asked. "Why do you do it?" He glanced over. "Do what?"

"Drive so fast." you said. "Push yourself so hard. Like you've always gotta prove something." His eyes didn't meet yours at first. He stared ahead for a long moment, jaw tightening like there was something heavy behind it. And then. "Because when I'm driving, I don't have to think." He said quietly. "Not about the stuff I can't fix. Not about the fights at home. Not about how I'm not enough for the people who are supposed to give a damn."

The last part came out like he didn't mean to say it. He finally looked at you. And you saw it-the truth behind the grin, the weight behind the confidence. He looked tired. Lonely, in the kind of way that didn't show. You didn't say, "I'm sorry." You didn't say, "that sucks." You just moved your hand and covered his. And he didn't pull away.

The silence between you changed after that. If softened. He turned his hand over, let your fingers slide between his, and it felt so easy, like it had been waiting to happen this whole time. His voice was soft when he spoke again. "You didn't walk today." You smiled faintly. "Nope. Drove the whole way.

He leaned in a little, just enough that his shoulder brushed yours. "Proud of you." You leaned forward, slow, careful, and kissed him. It was slow and a bit messy. It was soft, and uncertain and real. The kind of kiss that didn't need fireworks because it was built from something gentle, something steadier.

When you pulled back, his eyes were still closed for a second too long. And then he smiled. "This counts as your reward." He said, voice low and teasing. You laughed, shaky, nervous, breathless. "Guess I'll have to keep practicing then..." He nodded, already leaning back in. "Guess you will."

It wasn't the kiss that changed everything. It was what happened after. The way you didn't look away when it got quiet. The way Christian leaned his forehead against yours like he didn't want to move, didn't want to lose that steady rhythm between your breaths. The way your fingers didn't untangle from each other until the stars started coming out and neither of you could ignore the hour anymore.

And the way, when you got home, your legs still felt like they remembered the curve of the road, and the way his hand found yours without asking. You weren't together. Not officially. Not out loud. You weren't not either.

A few nights later, you found him in your driveway. It was almost midnight. You heard the knock on the garage first, soft, short. Like someone trying not to get caught. You peaked out your bedroom window and nearly tripped yourself over rushing down the stairs. Christian was standing there, grease on his face. "Do I even wanna ask..?" You whispered, stepping into the warm summer dark.

"She wouldn't start." You blinked. "... your car...?" He gave a stiff nod, embarrassed. "Engine's being a brat. I didn't wanna wake Logan. Or y'know..dad." The words came out strained. Like he hadn't mean to say them. You didn't press. Instead, you opened the garage. "Come on, let's fix her up." You'd never seen Christian frustrated before.

Not like this. He tried to hide it, smirking through gritted teeth, brushing off every swear, but you could tell. His hands were too tight on the socket wrench. His shoulders too tense. The kind of pressure that didn't come from an engine. "Want me to hold the light..?" You asked gently. He exhaled. "Please." You stood beside him in the garage while the fan whirred overhead, casting lazy shadows across the walls.

His hair was messie than usual, pushed back with one hand. There was a small smear of oil on his jaw you kept looking at. He kept looking at you. "You ever think maybe you're the only person I can breathe around?" He said suddenly. "What..?" You tilted your head. He didn't repeat himself. Just ducked back under the hood like he hadn't just said the one thing that had been sitting in both of your chests for weeks. You set the flashlights down. Walked around the side. And gently put your hand on his on the edge of the car.

"Then don't hold your breath next time." You whispered. He looked up. His eyes were tired. Guarded, hopeful. And then he kissed you again. Right there, grease smudged, sweat, the garage light flickering above like some kinda spotlight. It wasn't quick or scared, it was real.

Afterward, you sat side by side on the floor, knees brushing, the engines still half open and forgotten. "Think I fixed more in there or in here?" he asked, tapping his chest lightly. You bumped your shoulder into his. "Let's call it a tie." He smiled. "I think I'm going to need more nights like this." You didn't say it, but your heart did. So do I.

You weren't being careful. Not really. You told yourself you were, waiting until late to text, slipping into the passengers seat with your hood up, leaving the garage door cracked just enough so it wouldn't creak when Christian pushed it open. But secrets have weight. And you both started to carry it differently. He started brushing your hair behind your ear without thinking. You started holding his wrist when he got quiet, not his hand, like that would somehow make it less obvious.

But everything between you, was becoming. Becoming harder to hide. Becoming more than what you'd meant it to. It was a Thursday night when you slipped into his car, face flushed from climbing out your window. Christian was already behind the wheel, drumming his fingers among the dash, sleeves pushed up, that silver chin catching in the dark.

He didn't say anything. Just reached across the seat and squeezed your thigh lightly, comforting, familiar, his version of, hey I missed you. You squeezed his hand back. "Drive anywhere." you said. He did. You ended up near the lake. The sky was clear, stars spilling over the tree line like static.

Christian parked off the dirt path, and turned off the headlights. The sudden quiet, wrapped around you like a second skin. You leaned against him, cheek on his shoulder, while music hummed low through speakers,some old rock song that he could barely sing alone. "Yknow." He said eventually. "I could do this forever." You tilted your head, Diving with her. "Drive with me?" "yeah." His voice was softer now. "Yeah, but also just... Be like this. With you, where it's quiet and no parents watching.

You turned your face into his hoodie to hide the smile you didn't mean to show. "I like it when you talk like that." He looked at you. "You make it easier." He said. You kissed him, soft and slow, like you were still getting used to the shape of something you didn't know you were allowed to have.

You hadn't planned on being at the race. But the second Christian texted you, Tonight, big one, come if you want. You were already putting your shoes on. The meet was half way down the county road, tucked behind a half abandoned orchard. It was one of those hush hush races that somehow always drew a crowd anyway-headlights cutting through dust, engines echoing like thunder through trees. Boys with too much to prove lined up like they had something to lose.

You spotted him instantly. Black hoodie. Chain glinting. Leaning against his car like it was an extension of him. Confident, cool. Until he saw you. And everything about him softened. He didnt smile, not really. But his shoulders relaxed, his jaw unclenched. His eyes did this quiet thing they only ever did around you. You walked up, pretending not the notice the way people glanced.

Let them. "You came." He said, almost surprised. You nodded, standing Then close. "Of course I did." Christian looked like he wanted to say something-like maybe he was thinking about Logan, or the fact that this was the first time you'd showed up when people could see. But he didn't say anything.

Just leaned in slightly and muttered. "Glad you're here." and maybe that was enough. The race was a straight shot down the orchard road. Nothing fancy. Just raw speed and nerves and the kind of danger that tasted like freedom. You stood near the starting line, arms crossed tight against your chest, heart thumping. Christian climbed into his car. You watched him settle his hands on the wheel, crack his neck, tap twice on the dash like it was some kinda ritual.

When the signal went up, you could barely breathe. And when it dropped-he flew. His car roared to life, tires screaming against asphalt, headlights slicing the dark. The crowd faded. The noise blurred. All you could see was him. Focused, fearless, fast. And free in the only way he really was-when he was driving.

He won. Of course he did. And when he stepped out of the car, you ran. Straight to him. He caught you mid laugh, arms locking around your waist like instinct. "You're insane." You said breathlessly. "You know that?" He kissed your cheek. "Yeah, but I'm your problem now." You looked up at him. The crowd was still lingering. You knew eyes were on you. You could feel them. Logan's somewhere in the mix, probably burning holes in the back of Christian's hoodie.

But Christian didn't pull away. He touched your face, brushing his thumb across your cheek bone. Then he leaned in, kissing you. Right there. In front of everyone. Like it didn't matter. Like he want scared anymore. When he pulled back, he kept his forehead pressed to yours. "I don't care who sees." He whispered. "I don't wanna hide this." You swallowed. Your voice came out soft. "Me neither..." Christian's car sat cooling behind you, engine ticking like a heartbeat. And for once, neither of you were looking over your shoulder.

#x reader #x yn #fyp #motorheads #motorheads x reader #trending #writeblr #writing #reader insert #fanfics #Motorheadschristianmaddox #Christian maddox #Christian Maddox x reader

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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I just finished the last episode of motorheads and oh. my. gosh. I already NEED season twooo!!! It'll probably be a bit until it comes out. Sad times. Some good news thoughhh, the second season is already written, so when the show gets renewed, it'll be a faster process because they can get straight to filming!!

#motorheads #motorheads x reader #trending #motorheadscurtis #fyppage #tumblr fyp #fyp

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Hey hey hey lovebugs!! I will be closing requests-just for now!!-I already have quite a few requests to fulfill so I'm trying to get those one's done. Thank you so much for your ideas, they're so cute and creative!! On top of that, I just want to say thank you so much for all of the support!! You guys are genuinely so sweet and I appreciate all of you so so much! That'll be all for me, I will open requests back up as soon as I can! Love you guys!

xo,

Jae<3

#x reader #x yn #fyp #motorheads #motorheads x reader #trending #writeblr #writing #reader insert #fanfics

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Hiii ☺️ i would like to request a Logan x fem reader in which Logan and Reader start dating at the end of high school and have a tradition of exchanging cute doodles, which extends into the present of the show and perhaps Marcel ends up finding one of these secret notes (because you know, Marcel always finds out everything hahahaha) and showing the group how cute they are. I thought maybe the story could start with a flashback of them in high school and then a bit of them in everyday life… idk 🥹

Thank you so much for this idea!! It turned out adorable, enjoy cutiepop!

Scribbled hearts

#motorheads #motorheads x reader #writeblr #x reader #x yn #fyp #trending #writing #reader insert #fanfics #logan maddox x reader #logan maddox

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Pairing: Logan Maddox x fem!reader (Motorheads)

Genre: fluff, romance, friends to lovers

Warning: this is insanely cheesy

A/n: this story was requested!

Scribbled hearts

"These promposals are going to kill me." You groaned, smacking your head onto the lunch table. "What, because you don't got a date to the prom?" Logan chuckled. "No.. because they're cheesy, and dumb, and did I mention cheesy?" You said, looking over at the promposal in motion. "You did." He responded with a nod. "I mean, can we talk about the fact that half of them aren't even based off of what the girls like?" You scoffed.

"They seem pretty happy to me..?" He replied, leaning back into his seat as he watched a guy across the quad hold up a giant glitter poster that read: "You auto be my date to prom!" next to a rusted out car with pink balloons tied to the mirror. "Okay, that ones kinda funny." Logan said with a snort. "Funny? Logan, she's terrified of driving. She literally failed her permit test three times." you pointed out, your tone flat.

He winced. "Oof... yeah, uh.. that's rough.." You groaned again, sinking into your seat. "It's like these guys don't even know the people they're asking. They just wanna get a scene, get a video, and go viral." Logan tilted his head, studying you for a second. "Okay Y/n, so what would you want then?" You paused, caught off guard by the question. "What do you mean..?"

"For a promposal. If it wasn't dumb or cheesy. If someone actually did it right." You narrowed your eyes at him to see if he was teasing, but he just seemed to be asking a question. "I don't know..." you said slowly. "Something small, something thoughtful, something that feels like me. Maybe custom to a special memory or something.."

You were about to press him, to ask why he was curious when the bell rang. He stood up, swinging his bag over his shoulders. "Cmon we got auto." He said, pulling you by your sleeve. You followed behind him, observing, a weird flutter kicking up in your chest. You shook your head. Nope. Not going there.

But later that day, when you opened your locker to find a small piece of paper, with a scribbled message surrounded by small doodles. "You're right. Cheesy isn't the way to go." You couldn't stop the smile that pulled your lips, glancing down the hallway to catch Logan looking at you from a distance with a boyish grin on his face. And your heart absolutely did not flutter. Not even a bit.

You slipped the paper into your pocket, cheeks warm, and shut your locker with a soft click. The hallway buzzed with end of the day chaos-slamming lockers, shouted goodbye's, and the occasional squeak of someone's busted up sneakers. But your gaze narrowed in on one thing. Luke. Or more specifically, the way he didn't even wait for a reaction. No smirk. No expectation. Just.. walked off like it didn't matter.

But it did. More than it should've. You found yourself smiling again as you walked into seventh period. And when you sat down in your usual seat, Logan was already there, chin propped in his hand, doodling something in the corner of his notebook. You didn't say anything right away. Just slid into your seat and let the silence stretch for a moment.

Then, casually. "You know, for someone who 'doesn't care' that was a pretty thoughtful note." Luke's mouth twitched, but be didn't look up. "Must've been a coincidence. Maybe your secret admirer's just got good timing." You snorted. "Right. Secret admirer who also happens to have the same terrible handwriting as you."

He finally looked at you, eyes dancing with something you couldn't quite put your finger on. "If it was me-which I'm not saying it was-I'd probably do something better next time." "Oh?" You raised an eyebrow. "Like what?" He leaned in slightly, voice low. "Not telling. You hate spoilers." You hated that he knew that. You hated how he was right. And you especially hated the heat crawling up your neck.

Class started but your brain was somewhere else entirely. You glanced at him from the corner of your eye, trying to decipher if this was still a joke to him or if..maybe he was serious. The next day, another note appeared, this time tucked between the pages of your sketchbook.

It was written on the back of a cafeteria napkin, in the same messy writing. "Today's prompt: list three things you'd actually say yes to. Bonus points if they're not cheesy." You looked up sharply, No Logan, just a blur of students. You bit back a smile and grabbed your pen and scribbled under the prompt.

1. A promposal that doesn't involve glitter

2. A date that starts with milkshakes and ends with a movie

3. Someone who actually listens

And underneath, in smaller letters. "You get points if you bring gummy worms."

You left your sketchbook half open on your desk during next period. And when you came back from the bathroom? The list had a fourth item, written in a new line below yours.

4. Logan

You stared at it. Blinked. Then closed the sketchbook quickly, your heart racing in your chest. This wasn't a joke anymore. And honestly? You weren't sure you wanted it to be. You spent the rest of the day in a daze. Like your brain had just hit the gas and the brakes at the same time. One minute you were replaying the moment you found your list edited-edited by Logan of all people. You were trying to convince yourself that it meant nothing.

It was a joke. It had to be. Logan teased everyone. He was effortlessly charming, full of that casual confidence that made it hard to tell when he was being serious. But item four? That didn't feel casual. That didn't feel like a joke. That felt like he saw you, really saw you.

By the time the final bell rang, you'd make exactly zero progress in calming down. Your stomach flipped as you shoved your books into your bag, barely even registering the conversations happening beside you. You were halfway down the hallway when you spotted him-leaning against the lockers like he had nowhere to be and all the time in the world.

"Hey." He said, straightening when he saw you. You stopped, adjusting the strap of your bag. "Hey." There was a pause. "So.." He began, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "Did I get any points?" You stared at him, your heart thudding in your chest. "For what..? Stealing my sketchbook?" Logan tilted his head, grinning. "For honesty. And the gummy worms."

You blinked. "You didn't even-" He pulled a little bag from his hoodie pocket and held it up. "Sour, not regular. I pay attention." You stared at the bag, then at him. Then back at the bag. He shrugged, a little less smug now. "I meant what I wrote, by the way. I know I joke around a lot, but... I wouldn't have put it on the list if I didn't mean it."

You swallowed hard, your voice coming out quieter than you expected it to be. "And what does that mean exactly?" He looked at you for a long second, all the teasing melting from his expression. "It means..." He said. "If you wanted to go to prom-with someone who doesn't believe in glitter signs or public embarrassment-I'd like to be that someone." He said, handing you a piece of paper once more, in the middle it read "Prom?" surrounded in the doodles of his that you loved so much.

Your breath caught. You could say no. You could make a joke, deflect, pretend your heart wasn't doing summersalts in your chest. But instead. "Okay." You said softly, a soft smile growing onto your face.

✩

Marcel held the small piece of paper in his hand, looking at it curiously. "Hey, check this out." He called out towards everyone who was inspecting a car. Caitlyn walked over, taking the paper. "... Wonder why Uncle Logan would have this.." She spoke, raising her brow. The paper in her hands looked a bit aged and worn out, it was slightly crumpled up and had some tears on the sides, but the ink remained in the same condition as the day "Prom?" and those small drawings were written onto it.

#x reader #x yn #fyp #trending #motorheads #motorheads x reader #writeblr #writing #reader insert #fanfics #logan maddox #logan maddox x reader

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Heyy! I just wanted to say I'm so happy to see another motorheads writer on here and I can't wait to read your work!

Oh my goshh, thank you so much love!! I just read your Curtis fic and I'm so in love with it!! I can't wait to read some more of your stories as well!

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Guys. This Logan fic is going so well!! It's so cute omgggg I really hope you guys like it!! It should be out by tomorrow, maybe earlier! Stay tuned lovebugs<33

#x reader #x yn #motorheads #motorheads x reader #trending #reader insert #fyp #writeblr #fanfics #writing #logan maddox #logan Maddox x reader

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Hi! I just wanted to say I am so excited to see someone writing motorheads fanfic! Im obsessed with the show and was wondering if I could request Ray Young x Ex girlfriend... maybe they broke up when she found out what he was doing, but they both still care, so there's pining and a question of what could have been, and so on

Just an idea, of course. Either way, thanks for reading this!

Yesss, I tried pulling this off as best as I could!! I hope you like it!

#fyp #x reader #motorheads #motorheads x reader #ray young x reader #ray young

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lvciddreqms · 2 months ago

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Pairing: Ray Young x Reader (Motorheads)

Genre: Angst, dramatic, fluff, exes to lovers

Warnings: cursing

A/n: about time I posted something for my Ray lovers<3

Things I wish I could take back

"Are you fucking serious? This is the shit that your doing behind my back? All this time-it was you, you're the one that's been doing these break ins? Taking people's cars? This is our home Ray! What are you doing?" You shouted in anger and shock. You just felt so betrayed, by the fact that he'd do this, he wouldn't tell you, going behind your back. Doing all of this illegal nonsense.

"You could get arrested for this. Is that what you want to happen? If you get caught, your dad can't help you." You felt tears build up in your eyes, but it was more because you were scared for him. He just stood there, taking it, not saying anything and just looking off to the side. You shook your head, sucking in a breath.

"... I can't do this." you said. "Fix up your act if you know what's good for you, Ray. I won't be there to help when you get caught." Those were the last words you said to him that day, the sound of your shoes heavy against the ground of the garage. For the next few nights that moment replayed in your head. When you found out.

You thought about the different outcomes that could've been. Maybe if you had been more understanding? Or if you had never broken up with him. Then what? Would you still be here in that part of the forest that you loved so much? Where you could see the rays of sunshine peak through the greenest of leaves.

You thought about the times in this specific area, your initials carved out onto the tree, the shared laughs while laying on the ground as the grass hugged your bodies. "Thought I would've found you here." A voice rang. You snapped out of it, quickly looking over to be met with his piercing eyes staring at you.

Your expression slightly hardened. "What're you doing here Ray?" You said, looking at him. He huffed, his hands shoved into his pockets as he sat next to you, backs against the trunk of the tree, a couple inches between the two of you. "... Just wanted to talk to you." You breathed in, tucking your knees to your chest and looked everywhere but towards him.

"I fucked up, okay? I know I did." He said. "I don't know why I didn't tell you, you always find out everything in the end. Y/n. I lose a lot of things, on the daily, alright? But I can't let you be one of them. You're the reason why I'm not in jail right now." He spoke, voice softer than his usual rough tone. "I'd take all of it back if I could."

You stayed silent, soaking in his words. "I just don't understand why you'd do all of it. What's the point..?" You said, trying to make sense of it all. He went silent at that, almost like he didn't know the point of it either.

"You say the word and I'll stop." He said. The words making you look over in slight shock. "Just please don't end this, end us." He said, looking at you. "... You'd do that for me?" You said in disbelief. "You must not know me very well." He said. You softly smiled at that.

"..i might not be able to change everything, but I'd take everything back just because you said." He spoke gently, looking at you like you were the most important thing on earth. "... As close to the real thing as you can be." You said softly with a smile. He smiled back at you.

No words were exchanged after that, just him laying back onto the grass, and pulling you to lay against his chest as you both stared into the sky. Just like you two used to do. How history repeats itself.

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