lumpyclumpityclod

[lumpyclumpityclod]

i hate it when customers get mad about policy and go “well i’ve always thought it worked differently” like ok. when i was a kid i thought the drains in sinks and bathtubs lead to Hell and i would pour things down them for the dead people. it turns out that you can think things that aren’t true

[lumpyclumpityclod]

i hate people who know highways. “i’m heading south on I-65” okay man. i’m moving my rook to c2

[lumpyclumpityclod]

There's a stereotype that USAmericans tolerate very long car rides.

[lumpyclumpityclod]

Xenokitty

[lumpyclumpityclod]

i really love the phrase “with all due respect” because it doesn’t specify how much respect is due. could be none. bitch.

[lumpyclumpityclod]

[lumpyclumpityclod]

[lumpyclumpityclod]

A universal mood.

I might turn these into stickers

[lumpyclumpityclod]

Which shape is the best?

[lumpyclumpityclod]

[lumpyclumpityclod]

So the Jet/Zuko fight scene is great for many reasons but can you imagine, sitting in dunkins donuts, sipping your dunkaccino, and this crazed teenager comes in with these enormous. hooks? and accuses the ALSO teenaged cashier of being a russian sleeper agent and there’s a cop who tries to diffuse the situation but instead of letting things de-escalate the cashier leaps over the counter, steals the cop’s gun, and says “i’ll give you a show” i mean-

[lumpyclumpityclod]

cannot recommend more putting secrets and hints in your creative work that you dont expect anyone to figure out

[lumpyclumpityclod]

[lumpyclumpityclod]

feed the local birds - ideally corvids, but pigeons will do just fine, seagulls if you are brave and fear nothing. Choose seeds, or something else that's non-perishable but healthy for birds.

get them accustomed to your presence, feed them at different times in a handful of different locations that you rotate between, so they learn to associate the feeding with you, specifically, and not the time and place that you are in. Always keep the feed in your pockets just in case.

teach them a specific word you'll call out as loudly as possible whenever you're about to distribute the food.

that specific word is ATTACK!

if you ever feel threatened by another person while walking down the street, you can just yell out ATTACK! at the top of your lungs.

ideally, the threat has no idea that this is the birds' cue for Food Person Is About To Distribute Food, and is scared shitless by the sight of a flock of wild birds swooping in at your call, and flees.

if this does not work, there is a very low, but above zero possibility of the birds seeing that their usual feeding routine has been interrupted by someone bothering The Food Person, and actually do start swooping at this inconvenience so that they can have their meal.

in either case, feed the birds as reward and payment for their work.

?????

fear tactic bird guard.

[lumpyclumpityclod]

This month I’ve decided to participate in an event called “October,” where for every day in October I’m going to experience a day in October.

Here’s the prompt list I’m using in case anyone wants to join me in this challenge:

Next month I’m thinking of trying out the “No November November” challenge, where I’ll refrain from experiencing November for the whole month of November.