lovesickforprice

[lovesickforprice]

"Bi-Han and Y/N, former lovers, struggle with forbidden feelings while serving the Lin Kuei."

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Frosted Shadows (Part 1)

The moon hung high above the Lin Kuei temple, casting its pale glow over the frost-covered grounds. The team had returned from the southern outpost hours ago, the threat neutralized for now. But Bi-Han’s mind wasn’t on the mission’s success—it was on you.

He sat alone in the training grounds, the cold wind biting at his skin through his sleeveless uniform. His arms rested on his knees, the frost around him spreading like a reflection of his restless thoughts. He knew you would come. You always did.

“You’re freezing the training mats again,” your voice came softly from behind him, a teasing lilt that carried the warmth he craved.

Bi-Han didn’t turn immediately, letting your steps draw closer. When he finally looked up, you were standing over him, arms crossed and a faint smirk on your lips. You had discarded your mask, something you only did when it was just the two of you. The sight of your face, unguarded, was a reminder of everything he’d lost—and everything he still wanted.

“I’ll replace them,” he said gruffly, his lips twitching into a shadow of a smile.

You raised an eyebrow. “Or you could stop ruining them in the first place.”

The corner of his mouth lifted, but the banter faded quickly. Your gaze lingered on him longer than usual, and he saw it—the same longing he felt every time he looked at you.

“You’ve gotten taller again,” he said suddenly, his voice low, almost reverent. His eyes swept over you, taking in the subtle changes. “And your hair…it’s longer now.”

Your expression softened, and you crouched down in front of him, your face now level with his. “And you’ve gotten rougher,” you replied, your tone gentle but firm. You reached out, your fingers brushing against the coarse stubble on his jaw. “You didn’t have this back then.”

He caught your wrist gently, holding it for a moment longer than necessary. His thumb brushed over your pulse, steady and strong beneath his touch. “It’s been a long time since ‘back then,’” he said quietly, his eyes meeting yours.

You didn’t look away, and neither did he. There was no shyness between you, no hesitation. You’d already been past that point long ago. The two of you had shared too many late-night conversations, too many stolen kisses in shadowed corners, too many whispered promises of forever before it had all been ripped away.

“You never wanted this, did you?” you asked, your voice softer now.

Bi-Han’s grip on your wrist tightened ever so slightly, though not enough to hurt. “I wanted you,” he admitted, his voice rough with emotion. “But it was never about what I wanted.”

Your parents had disapproved of him from the start, despite your history. To them, he was destined to be Grandmaster—a role too sacred, too demanding for something as fleeting as love. And to the Lin Kuei elders, your relationship had been seen as a distraction, a weakness he couldn’t afford.

But to him, you were never a weakness. You were the one thing that made him feel alive in a world of duty and ice.

“You still want me,” you said, no question in your tone, only certainty.

He let out a low chuckle, one without humor. “You don’t make it easy to forget.”

Your hand slipped free of his grip, only for you to place it on his cheek, your touch soft but grounding. “Then stop trying.”

The words hung between you, fragile yet unyielding. His resolve cracked, the frost around him dissipating as his other hand reached up to cover yours. His calloused fingers were rough against your smoother skin, but you didn’t pull away. You never had.

“I can’t,” he said, though the words felt hollow. “You know why.”

“I know what they’ve told you,” you countered, leaning closer. “But what about what you want, Bi-Han? What about what we want?”

Your faces were close now, close enough for him to see the faint lines of frost still clinging to your lashes, the way your lips parted slightly as you waited for him to answer. He hated how easily you unraveled him, how your presence alone made him question everything he’d been taught to believe.

“I’ve always wanted you,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “But wanting doesn’t change the rules.”

Your lips twitched into a faint, sad smile. “Then break them. For once, stop being the Grandmaster and just…be you.”

He didn’t answer, but his silence spoke volumes. You knew him too well, knew the war raging inside him. And despite everything, you leaned closer, your forehead pressing gently against his.

The cold air around you seemed to still, as if the entire world was holding its breath. His eyes closed, and he allowed himself this moment—this stolen fragment of time where it was just you and him, no titles, no expectations.

“I miss this,” you whispered, your breath warm against his lips. “I miss us.”

He exhaled shakily, his hand moving to the back of your neck, his fingers tangling in your hair. “So do I,” he admitted, his voice breaking slightly.

For a heartbeat, it felt like everything else had fallen away. The rules, the clan, the burdens of leadership—they were distant echoes in the face of the one thing he truly cared about.

But then, the faint sound of footsteps echoed from the corridor. The moment shattered, and Bi-Han pulled back abruptly, his expression hardening once more.

You blinked, your hand slipping from his face as you stood. The mask was back—not just the one you wore as his second-in-command, but the one you both wore to protect yourselves.

“Goodnight, Grandmaster,” you said, your voice carefully neutral as you turned and walked away.

He watched you go, his chest heavy with everything he couldn’t say.

“Goodnight,” he whispered, though you were already gone.

As the frost crept back across the training mats, Bi-Han clenched his fists, his jaw tightening. He would lead the Lin Kuei. He would fulfill his duty.

But deep down, he knew the frost in his veins could never erase the fire you’d left behind.

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This is my first ever fanfict guys so I'm sorry if it's bad but I just really like bi han so I wanted to write this for a long time 🤷🏽‍♀️