lovely-lydia - Tumblr blog

[lovely-lydia]

[lovely-lydia]

[lovely-lydia]

just a reminder that summer is coming!

do you really want to look like that?

[lovely-lydia]

I wanna go home but I'm already home

[lovely-lydia]

the maintenance cycle 🫠🫠🫠

[lovely-lydia]

I wanna weight nothing

[lovely-lydia]

Ik besta 2 jaar op Tumblr 🥳

Whoop whoop

[lovely-lydia]

Tracy K. Smith, “Don’t You Wonder, Sometimes?”

[lovely-lydia]

pieces of me

[lovely-lydia]

[lovely-lydia]

when you don’t hit the „i didn’t eat for 3 days so i could be lovely” but the „i didn’t eat for 3 days so i could be lovely and then binged, cause i got stressed, so now i can’t go out with you” part of ed 💀💀💀

[lovely-lydia]

You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny. You’d be pretty if you were skinny.

[lovely-lydia]

I'm super happy because I did a 67hr fast and drank a lot of water while trying to get to at least 5k steps a day and I dropped 3kgs in 67hrs...i feel so proud of myself but here's what I learned from this experience :

1. after 50hrs my body seemed to really adapt to the hunger and I suddenly felt nothing. no hunger at all but I was just super tired.

2. at this point I felt super faint and ready to pass out at anytime which sucked because I was doing a lot besides my workouts.

3. chugging ice cold water totally helps when I feel like I can't go on and boosts my energy and mood.

4. i know this may have been a cheat but at 46hrs I had a had a hot chocolate and it satisfied my hunger enough to keep going. felt like crap afterwards though cause I was convinced I would gain more weight (I didn't though :)) so maybe a hot chocolate mug is good to have I guess.

5. hunger came back at 65ish hours but I tried to stay afloat by distracting myself with reading which totally helped... I'm sure a movie would also distract me enough.

6. I surrounded myself with thinspo pics by changing my phone wallpaper to a collage of thinspo images and it was motivational.

7. avoid walking into the kitchen or seeing food as much as possible. that was a big help.

8. chewing gum really helped when I felt faint. don't know why but it kept me afloat.

9. the first 24 hours were the hardest but after that I could handle it. turns out I'm stronger than I give myself credit for.

honestly this was an amazing experience for me. really showed me that I definitely have a lot of strength and I can really get to my ugw if I want it bad enough. I'm definitely going to get to 72hrs in the future. I'm actually thinking of doing a 3 day fast every single week and having a single hot chocolate mug when I'm at my weakest of course. from a frightening 75kg all the way down to 72kg in 3 days might not seem like much but it's actually so much I could sob rn. I broke my fast after 67hrs because I had to go to a dumb food festival dinner thingy with my parents but surprisingly I only ate half a mushroom calzone and was so full I couldn't move. I took that as a good sign cause it means I may have shrunk my intake because of the fast. weighed myself before the dinner and I was at 72.6kg and this morning I'm at a clear 72.0kg so I didn't even gain from it... I actually lost. super proud of myself already. I can do it. I can get to my GW which is 60kg before Christmas if I keep going. and to whoever reads this long ass post you can do it too. you are in control.

[lovely-lydia]

some tips from a former ana girl who has relapsed a couple times :,(

1: your calorie intake on a “norma day should be 400-600

2: on a highly restricting day it should be 100-300

3: if you’re a beginner, fast for 1 to 3 days and break the fast with a small/low calorie meal so you have energy but feel in control

4: trigger yourself as much as u can especially when you’re hungry

5: instead of watching mukbangs, watch “filming my binge” type of videos or videos talking about obesity

6: if you feel like watching mukbangs watch some disgusting ones or ones where fat people are the ones eating the food.

7: DRINK A SHIT TON OF WATER!!! you’ll thank me later

8: eating salt will break the fast

9: skip the hugest meal (example: for me it’s lunch bc my family always cooks a big meal for lunch lol) but don’t make it noticeable

10: don’t purge, it’s not worth it you will just dehydrate yourself and not throw up the actual food unless you are very full and do it immediately after eating.

11: the best option is to throw the food away if your parents are suspecting our ed, don’t give it to your dogs bc juman food can be really harmful for them:(

12: if you’re gonna throw the food away don’t do it on the toilet (only when extremely needed) it can clog that shit up and when someone goes to fix it the will see the food and tell your parents (it has happened to me)

13: instead, put the food in a bag and hide it in your closet. throw that bag away after 30 hours bc that’s when it starts to stink

14: don’t spend your whole day on tumblr because that will make you think about food so much, instead do homework, workout, watch a tv show or movie, you can be productive and lose weight at the same time.

i’ll do a part 2 tomorrow, hope this are helpful <3 (not putting any hashtags bc i don’t want my account terminated like always)

[lovely-lydia]

I want a slutty little waist

[lovely-lydia]

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

I need to be in control. I need to be in control.

[lovely-lydia]

I want to get to a point in my ED where I get used to eating so little that my binges will look like normal-sized meals to others. I want to hate myself for eating a whole bowl of oats, or a single sandwich, want my stomach to shrink so much that putting 3 apples in it will hurt and be nauseating. I don't wanna be a goblin swallowing behemoth portions of food from the refrigerator in the middle of the night. I want to be a tiny fairy getting full from a single drop of sundew in the morning.