lizsaints - Tumblr blog

[lizsaints]

No le deseo mal, pero sin embargo… … …

[lizsaints]

Me: I don't think my chronic illness is bad today! :D I mean I just have a little pain—

Me as soon as I get home:

[lizsaints]

I hate how I get whenever I wake up from surgery. The anesthesia makes me so fuckin emotional. I sobbed thinking about all of my restrictions.

I just want to be a fuckin normal and healthy person. The universe knows I try so damn hard. And I’ve been so inconsolable today. Cuz I know this isn’t it. There will be more surgeries to come and I’m already tired.

It’s hard trying to accept that I’ll never be ok. I’ll never be pain free. Living the rest of my life just treating symptoms.

I hope spirit understands how weak I am right now and cuts me some slack. Once the anesthesia is out of my system I’ll think more rationally.

But right now?? I’m drowning.

[lizsaints]

Incredible what burning the right herbs can do for clarity and peace of mind.

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

spilled perfume prinkled with dusted coated the top, strewn with tangled jewelry and old coins and a beautiful wooden box..

[lizsaints]

im in a constant state of trying to calm down

[lizsaints]

Fuckin hate September.

And those sanpaku eyes

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

I just felt a spell bounce off of me

[lizsaints]

[lizsaints]

Just turned down the California job.