littlewalken

[littlewalken]

nov 21

Glad my going out and adulting is done for five minutes because I'm having some stay home and take care of them physical ailments that if they aren't related to the reverse puberty then there's something else disagreeing with my system.

It can't be the chocolate orange because I haven't had a slice in days.

I'm glad those are seasonal because I would make a chocolate orange part of my regular diet. Not a whole one but at least a slice a day. But every day things aren't treats, they're habits.

Actually looking forward to doing the laundry today because that is some general movement exercise which several spots in my body need as opposed to spending all day in the car.

And if you suspect your financial institution of shenanigans get out your broom and move your money. Fortunately we were able to using moving a good hour away from like the only branch as an excuse because them changing their name to something exactly the same as another place but not being affiliated along with limiting the ATMs you could use was extra bullshit.

Should I be able to craft today I have the crochet thread where I can reach, the regular size 10 altho getting to others won't be hard, and several options of things to make. Got to get in to the yarn and put some hair on the Halloween doll as one of the places we consign will take home made things. Altho she'll more than likely hang around here for a little while longer.

Note to self go around the corner to the store and get some Xmas fat quarters and make an Xmas version of the rag doll with sparkly Xmas yarn hair. When I get new wrists because I'd honestly rather use them to crochet or draw right now and I don't make any rag dolls I don't want ot be stuck with.

Keeping the Halloween doll another 11 months with the possibility of making her a friend and more clothes out of the scraps of the Halloween quilt is a possibility.

Looking at a stay the fuck indoors winter storm coming for a few days which might be a good time to deal with what I'd call the wizard fabric stash.

This is a good example of one shape I was considering for the patches (I'd do them in one piece tho) called "church windows"

And this is a similar one called "badge of honor"

But they don't quite feel like what I'm going for. I'm also looking at 60 degree diamonds.

[littlewalken]

nov 20

Got in to looking at the Codex Seraphinianus, brb https://archive.org/details/codex-seraphinianus-luigi-serafini-2013-9780847842131

Something something spent too long looking for this book in my younger days as I didn't know the title, lots of related shit to unpack something something only when I got my own internet access when I was 30 did I finally have the time to look around and find it something something but as hard copies by then were unaffordable it would still be many years until a pdf ended up on the web something something you want limited editions then deal with the people who just want to read the book resorting ot other means something something

And still you can't actually read the book but in a Voyanich Manuscript sort of way and that's the point.

Again it's a resource that if I had access to much earlier in my path towards becoming an artist and writer who knows what could have been. Withholding knowledge that isn't like a matter of security hurts no one.

Well, if nothing else today after a morning appointment I will hopefully get five minutes to think. I need to be home to hydrate, I'm getting some physical side effects from that, and what ever else might be bothering me. It's the overnight seizures I don't know about.

Got to look up my new regular doctor and see about physically going there because I know the one dentist never answered their phone and the other used a secretary in another office so I no trust my appointment would even be made unless I'm there.

Will be playing with my "daily" charm bracelet soon. I think I'm going to take some of them off, the magick ones, and make a separate bracelet or a pin for them.

The year I turn 50 is steadily approaching and so the idea of 50 charms that represent me is one for thought. Still haven't settled on a specific journal, the page count and size is the biggest thing, so I folded some tabloid paper in to signatures and will start with that. I can always copy the stuff in to a neater format in another book later.

It's not like I intend for anyone else to ever read it or anything, it's just that I never journaled any other milestone birthdays. Aside form being something else school ruined for me as a child, and failed to explain in a way that would have clicked to my autistic brain because why would I want to write down my secrets somewhere that someone could find them and use them against me, at 25 I wasn't in a good place, at 30 I was rewiring, and at 40 I was not somewhere I'd want to remember much and took days to get over no one anywhere in the places I interacted daily with on the internet even tho they had reminders thought to wish me a happy birthday so I was questioning how much I mattered to anyone.

And plenty of real life trauma like totally forgetting what fucking day I was born on even tho you live with me and have to know it for all sorts of filling out paper work reasons.

And I still have no idea what it's like to have a birthday party because of how I was raised poor and not the golden child who always had money spent on her.

So for the first draft having loose paper I can easily replace if need be for whatever reason is probably a good idea. Just wish in one way I had a long stapler I could staple the signatures with but I can hand stitch them well enough as soon as I get the stuff out.

Remind me to get some replacement needles for my mending machine. I think it came with some, haven't changed any yet, didn't with any of the old ones until they broke, but it's still working.

Going to make myself cut the Xmas strips in the next step to learning myself to make a strip quilt too.

[littlewalken]

Tuxedo cats come in two forms- sleek and sophisticated

Or too much fits for their sits.

[littlewalken]

The thing about internet censorship is if you use it to silence people you don't agree with when they come in to power they just might want to axe the whole thing.

So if the incoming powers decide that they have the right to say what ever the hell they want on the internet everyone else better take advantage of it.

And my opinion that media preservation is as important as Old Oil Tycoon's opinion that the telegraph is the work of ungodly evil spirits.

[littlewalken]

nov 19

Go outside do real life all day or at least a better part of the morning plans today, adulting plans tomorrow morning. And somewhere in it all I'm thinking of moving my books around again but as we got most of the archive back I can borrow and cut down on the analog books.

I'm always going to be bringing books home but it's more I'd like to bring Muppet amigurumi and NKOTB 40th books home as opposed to a stack of I think I might be interested in this topic.

Also going to get out the scanner. On one hand I want digital back ups of my Cure books, some of them are rather obscure, and on the other less physical books to deal with. Not like I'm getting rid of those two Time Life sets of fairy tales and mythology, or whatever it is, and the black cover mysterious mysteries of mystery.

I know the smothering unit hates them like she hates Star Trek, yes please tell your children that you hate something because their other parent liked it so they can totally internalize that, so I have to keep them around.

If you're one of my IRL friends I will be cutting down on my analog Star Trek books, starting with the novels. I know we just had a black out here and all that but it's for my damn health and well being that I manage some of the stuff I have around here.

With scanning the books if it's like text only or doesn't have footnotes and appendixes galore there's no reason not to have it just as an ebook. It's not one of those 1000 page bible paper things.

The tracing of the Thomas picture is good to go, I just don't think I'll have the time I would want to do it this morning. I figured I need a box with at least a 4x6 if not 6x6 footprint for my reference pics. There's an Art Bin box I like but my experience with them has always been too long one way, too short that way, not tall enough here, and what the hell are you supposed to put in there because I can hardly get my tiny baby hand in there and you'd expect a grown ass man with giant hands to reach a pencil rolling around that space?

[littlewalken]

Since y'all have a short attention span this is all you need to understand why Thomas Bangalter has a boner for this movie and a lot of Daft Punk stuff looks like this.

[littlewalken]

nov 18

Maybe this time next year I'll have a slight idea what kind of seizure I had yesterday because if I make my doctor's appointment now I might see one by then.

Not in the mood to type the rest of that opinion but it's as valid as anyone else's who has had a similar experience.

There should be a friendship/room mate/dating service where people who need to be needed can be hooked up with disabled people that have similar interests.

I finally did a tracing of the Thomas picture on thinner paper so I can use that if I'm going to try for the elebenty-ith time to do the one particular picture. The last one was going well but for the choice of pencil colors not working out. I'm trying some different methods and... The point is I'm trying.

Had a story I haven't thought of in a while try to work some more things out. It has an idea and characters but it's not finding much of a plot yet.

In our suddenly going out to get something for the fish tank I came home with a spooky crochet kit, was on sale and has a plague doctor, and the Muppets amiguri book. I'm going to make them out of crochet thread to make them small.

If the back works today I want to do more around here than change my sheets, if not I'm still going to change my sheets. Mostly because by the time the person I asked to help finishes what they're doing, forgets I asked, then starts something else I can do it myself.

[littlewalken]

The I Heart Radio weed bus must have really wanted some Wendys

[littlewalken]

nov 17

And... I found new to me pics of Thomas Bangalter. The baby robots, who can't be his because they look like Guy Man Eliode who has a similar face, are finally growing in to their anime legs.

And...

I am trying to draw, one picture in particular which I think I'll take a break from, because I want to get the facial expression just right. The only way I will is to practice.

Feeling a bit tapped creatively but that will pass. Rewatching Venom, it's been so long I've forgotten a lot of it, then I might go in to Venom 2 or something else. I'd honestly tell newcomers to watch 3-1-2 because you really don't need the first one to go in to the third one at first any way.

The worn oldness of Thomas' shoes in the photo compared to the boys', especially the one on the right.

My brain wants to tell me there's a Flexipop or rare release version of Catch by The Cure, it's actually Lament, as my memory wants me to think there's a more heavily keyboard mix than the released version but I could be thinking of the one played on The Tube.

I was raised in a house of gaslighter, I don't need to do it to myself.

Doing good on the not buying plastic crack front, I treated myself to both flavors of chocolate oranges, have been looking for those, and I bought some more holiday pajamas which I know I'll get more enjoyment out of. Also found fuzzy ankle boots so I was able to retire the pair that were too big and needed to be parted with.

Also remembered that I don't have a calendar book thing that I wanted to have a more detailed diary of what I did the year I turned 50 but I still have a bit of time for that.

[littlewalken]

Thomas Bangalter and his sons Tara-Jay and Roxan at the anime legs convention.

[littlewalken]

Then they got Michael an exorcism

[littlewalken]

November 2024 media wish list

Here's the things I'd like to see, know what I mean nudge nudge, before the ice locks me ship in for the winter. As always I'll keep an eye out for things you're looking for.

The Umbrella Academy s4

Bridgerton s3, at least part 1

What We Do in the Shadows s6

Larger than Life Rise of the Boybands

[littlewalken]

nov 16

For middle of the night leg cramps, stand on the leg if you can if you can't see if straitening your leg by pointing your heel (if that makes sense) helps.

Some of y'all have never had both legs go off at the same time and it shows.

But I still don't have anything physically wrong with me, like back problems, or low red blood cell anemia, so it must be hysteria because I'm female.

Did a colored pencil thing yesterday that I would call successful, will take a pic if I have the right light today, and one that was okay enough but I didn't feel like finishing and my want to use up some of the colored pencils to be done with them made me chose ones that were adequate but weren't up to doing the job.

If I had a real life friend who was taking art classes or in need of supplies due to financial distress, of which I decide if that is true or not, I'd give them some of the extra I have.

In general I don't give gifts with strings, my grandsmother was like that, but I've been both poor and jerked around enough that especially anyone who makes way more than I do but has terrible financial planning that they don't want to correct can go fuck themselves. Hopefully you don't know who I mean.

Oh well.

Did get some more reference pictures printed out to make art of. I need to wither have less pictures in my stash or get a bigger container or figure out a way to carry the little sketchbook and mechanical pencil along with the container. First world prombles.

One of them is an electric pic of Thomas from Daft Punk. Pause for a moment to wonder how the Robot Rock video would have gone over if the world saw what they looked like instead of the leather clad robots playing Phantom of the Paradise.

A heck of a lot of females get lady bonders for masked men.

And I think I might be saying females a hell of a lot more for several reasons, deal with it.

[littlewalken]

The Cure back when Lol was drumming and all the songs people recognize haven't been invented yet.

[littlewalken]

nov 15

Tried to do some colored pencil stuff yesterday and was reminded it's been some time since I've played with them in a non coloring book way. I don't do them the same way and we'll just leave it at that.

Got to look at it as I have an extra set of Derwent Chromaflow pencils for a gift exchange incase I end up in one. They're the above studio but not specialty line. Basically any of their colored pencils that aren't the hexagonal studio/artist (green barrel or black and white set) because it's the same core just thinner or thicker or the Chromaflow or the slightly fancier Procolor I'd generally say are "special" because they're either soft, have clay cores, lightfast/oil, pastel, charcoal, or a form of watercolor.

The studio/artist are hard and good for people who use a lot of pressure, the Coloursoft are soft like what Prismacolor should be if it had quality control but better, Lightfast are translucent, the soft drawing orange barrel are for Gashir artists because it'll have all the colors you'll need for them.

Trying to figure what we need to get done on our outing today. On one hand it's great living within five minutes of most places we need, walking distance if my body wasn't giving out on me, on the other we know how the big shopping center gets during gift season and we're figuring out ways to get home that don't require that intersection.

But we chose this neighborhood because the last one was no where near close to a grocery store and being I don't drive and have a history of shitty cars, but not this one, I want to be able to get to a grocery store on foot if I must. How did you know I grew up food insecure, managed to not have any sort of eating or weight disorder, and had an okay relationship with all that until we had to lock the fridge to keep the Life Ruiner from leaving the doors wide open, then add the summer of being homeless...

I'm still okay with food except for having to watch how much fish oil I have at any given time and not getting along with cruciferous vegetables. Fuck no I can't be vegan, I'm under doctor's orders to eat meat.

Going to try some more colored pencil stuff today. It's important to make art and do creative things without consequences.

[littlewalken]

Finished Venom, no spoilers

Checkoff's sneakers paid off

Glad I read the summary because my source cut off the hopeful end bit

Saw that repair coming

The return of the middle of the movie people and the whole Magic the Gathering card guy and his sub plot could have been dropped for a simple old fashioned chase movie. Past movie cameo could have stayed, that could have been timed better for a welcome release.

It's an okay movie, the pacing sucks like all the recent Marvel movies, just kind of lays there like a bored symbiote interchanged with shit they won't have to dub for China.

[littlewalken]

If you look in a mirror and say Beetlejuice Scary Perry 3 times he appears and plays Harold and Joe.