littlebodydollheart

[littlebodydollheart]

how to say i’m too broken for love and i’d rather have abuse

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · i have had an awful day. i started out by eating a relatively normal amount, but then my dad made me more food, which led to me bingeing. i did eventually throw up multiple times, but i think it was too late to actually get rid of any of the calories. luckily i think im too sick to consider eating again anytime soon. im still so disappointed in myself though. i also only burnt off about 300 cals by walking, which is not nearly enough to make up for what i ate. i have a super busy day tomorrow, so i don't know if ill be able to burn off anything then. ill certainly try if i get the chance though. im scared to weigh myself tomorrow and see how much ive ruined my progress. i was doing so well too!! i lost 1.5 lbs from yesterday.

[littlebodydollheart]

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · i am so dead tired and my entire body hurts i just burnt off 1093 calories by walking. i also didn't eat anything today and (tmi warning) i finally took a shit so im definitely going to weigh less by tomorrow morning. i hope i can keep pushing myself to do long walks and burn lots of calories but im so tired that i may need a day to recover

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · im so confused?? i had 900 calories yesterday (if i grossly overexaggerate) and somehow i lost 0.6 lbs?? i did go on an extremely long walk and burnt off 837 calories but im still disappointed in myself because i need to be going on those sorts of walks without eating anything!!! but it's kind of crazy that over the past few days whenever ive eaten a lot i lose weight and when i haven't eaten anything ive lost almost no weight. im not going to eat anything today and ill go on a walk and see if i lose any more weight tomorrow. also i think im finally starting to look thinner again. i measured my waist and it was about 2 inches smaller than the last time i measured it (which was a long time ago) and my thigh high socks are fitting better again. i also think my legs and waist look somewhat slimmer. i still feel pretty fat though and i know ill feel a lot better when i finally reach 125 lbs. but im making progress!!

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · im so pissed off i literally ate nothing yesterday and i only lost 0.2 lbs???? wtf???? at least i went down 0.1 bmi points which isn't much but ill take what i can get

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · somehow i lost 2.1 lbs?? even after all i ate yesterday?? the purging must've really worked i guess but that does not mean im going to make a habit of it. also my stomach is growling rn which is one of the best feelings

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · i purged for the first time in literal years today. im so beyond ashamed. i started off today so well, with only 160 calories, and then only 300. but then i was a fucking idiot and ate 760 more, making a total of 1060 cals. the guy i like said i should only be having 1000 cals a day, max. and i said that was a lot!! im so embarrassed for exceeding it now. i did go on a walk today, but i only burnt about 400 calories. and i know purging is very unhelpful and only gets rid of less than half of the calories you consume, but half of 760 is 380, and to be safe ill assume i only got rid of 100 or 200 calories, but at least that'd make it so i technically consumed less than 1000. im also going to fast for as long as possible to make up for this. i was literally doing so well and then i went and ruined it all. i hate myself so much for this. im also drinking monster because that's worked kind of as a laxative for me before. even though i fucked up so badly, im kind of proud of myself for getting up and purging instead of just being miserable and not doing anything about it. also the food wasn't even good because i was literally so guilty about eating it. maybe i can try to break my fasting record again to make up for this. and go on multiple extremely long walks in the upcoming days to burn as many calories as possible

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · im literally so relieved. id been avoiding weighing myself because i was afraid id gained but i had to weigh myself bc the guy i kinda like told me to and i actually weighed less than the last weight id recorded on here!! so ive lost 7 lbs since i got out of the hospital which isn't a lot but it's better than nothing. i also have a new goal weight because that guy wants me to get down to 125 lbs before may. im sure i can do it. according to the justcico website, i can get there in april if i have 500 calories a day, but ill have way less because im going to fast as much as possible. normally id be worried about fucking up and bingeing, but my need for him to be proud of me is stronger than my cravings (which is saying something bc i have really strong cravings)

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · im getting back on track!! (kind of) i fasted for 60+ hours a few days ago, but then i went to a party and they had singaporean pineapple tarts and shrimp tempura which are some of my favourites that i never get the chance to have so i had to break my fast. i have no idea how many calories it was. then i fasted for 44 hours until today bc i was given free food but it ended up being 900 calories!!! horrible!!! but i burnt 555 calories (the angel number too!! i see so many angel numbers) and possibly more bc it was freezing cold when i went out walking. obviously im fasting again now and im gonna go as long as possible and only eat fruits and vegetables. i haven't weighed myself in a long time and im not going to until i fast for a lot longer. ive also been thriving in other areas of my life!! ive actually now met that friend of a friend who's into ribs showing and he's totally falling for me and i might be falling for him a little too. it's so nice because he praises me for not eating and encourages me to be skinnier. it's so easy to overcome my cravings when i think of him ive literally never been more motivated in my life. having a crush is a stronger appetite suppressant than ozempic itself

[littlebodydollheart]

when I wanna kms but it'd be embarrassing to die this fat 😓

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · ugh after the hospital i got way off track because my mom screamed at me for even not having an appetite because she was so afraid id go back to the hospital again. but now i urgently need to lose weight!! a friend of a friend has a thing for ribs and also for tall girls (im 5'7) and for kawaii girls (ive dedicated my life to becoming as cutesy as possible) and so my friend asked me if my ribs were showing so they could show me to their friend. i told them i needed a little while and they told me to let them know when im ready so i now have to lose as much weight as possible literally as fast as i can. ive decided im going on a diet where i only eat fruits and vegetables, but ill try to avoid eating as much as possible too. i also need to start exercising and going out walking again. im not even sure what my cw is anymore but im sure it's terrible. i also stopped listening to my subliminals like an idiot so i need to get back on that. i regret not going right back to fasting the second i got out of the hospital. if anyone could recommend me anything for getting my ribs to show faster id really appreciate it (i also unfortunately have a small ribcage which kind of makes me look thinner under my clothes but it means my ribs didn't even really show at my lw)

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · im literally so cooked guys. i got home from the hospital and weighed myself today and id gained 5 lbs. even worse, if i don't eat regularly, ill have to go back to the hospital. i had to eat a meal at the hospital today and i don't know how many calories it was, and then just now i had to eat again and it was 370 calories (im guessing). im definitely going to keep track of calories and make sure to have as little as possible for all my meals. on the bright side, my mom says i probably just gained a ton of water weight from the iv fluid. i hope that's true. everyone keeps trying to encourage me to lose weight in healthy ways, but that's not something i have any interest in doing. i need to lose the weight fast. im really angry that im not allowed to fast at all for a long time, because restricting is way harder than fasting. i need to practice fasting so i can go back to doing extremely long fasts without becoming deathly ill.

[littlebodydollheart]

`` ~ ୨୧ ♡ · i have really bad news. unfortunately i went into something called starvation ketosis, which has been making me feel incredibly sick and throw up. im now in the hospital with an IV of sugar water and im trying to drink fluids and keep them down. im really worried that this will make me gain all the weight back but part of me doesn't even care because im literally so miserable and in so much pain that all i want is to feel better. i don't understand why this is happening either because the last time i attempted a super long fast like this, i was fine. im also so sick that i have to drop out of school which really sucks. i think i might finally be starting to feel w little better though which is a huge relief.

[littlebodydollheart]

Reblog if you're an active 3D blog in 2025 and are okay with teen mutuals

(I need mutuals)

[littlebodydollheart]

me when I wanna be shorter but also wanna be taller because I wanna be tiny but I also want to be tall 🥺😭😔

[littlebodydollheart]

I wish I could fast forever