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Fuck I’m so in love with her. Buying her cherry cola and driving with the sun roof down, Metallica blasting from the stereo as we drive to a vegetarian friendly restaurant. This is how I want my life to be, to be with her, until the whole plan of existence well…ceases to exist, when that happens, I’ll still keep on loving her, her honey orbs, her soft delicate skin, her beautiful voice and wonderful laughter, her gorgeous smile.
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I was born to muck around on devices. thousands of years ago I would constantly be on the abacus in Stone age times I’d be staring at the cave wall drawings for 6 hours a day
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about me!!
☆ just some intro stuffs
~i’m 15, non-binary (afab), and i use any pronouns
~unlabeled in my sexuality but i’m thinking pan or bi?
~right now, my style is pretty grunge, but i want to lean more like yk rockstars gf look this summer ykykyk
☆ things i love
~fnaf!! i grew up watching markiplier, jacksepticeye, and matpat play and do theories and stuff about it. i’m not as i guess “involved” for lack of a better term, than i used to be, but i still always watch any new theories or videos from creators i like about it :)
~music! i cant even explain it well enough in words how i love it. i love punk, rock, punk-rock, indie, shoegaze, pop, metal, soul, alt, rap, literally anything but country
☆ now some of my personality!! (you don’t have to read all of this, it’s kinda just rants of things i love!!)
~i love experiencing life. i want to be everything i cant. i wish to be everything. i maladaptive daydream, and while yes it may be harmful to my grades, my attention, my relationships, i honestly don’t care. i love my little worlds i’ve made in my head. “i hate how limiting this human life is. because i wish i could be a woman, a man, a mother and a father, to not have kids at all, i want to try every single food, to read every single book, to visit every place it is humanly possible to visit, to learn every single language, to gain all the knowledge of this world and to be completely clueless, i want to be a writer, a painter, a scientist, a musician, a lawyer. i want to meet everyone and make friends i'll can't even count to be a lover and to love, to be both the artist and the muse, oh god I wish I had a thousand lives this one is just not enough.”
~i’m a hopeless romantic. i want to experience love and passion. i want to care for someone and be cared back, love someone and have that love reciprocated. i maladaptive daydream, like i said, and my universes key component are about love. different ways i fall in love, meet people, live life.
~i love people. i love how we all have our own little ways of expressing ourselves with our styles or music or hair, it’s all just so cute. i love watching people experience life. looking around, you can see just anything, and you have no idea of their past, present, or future. all you know is how you perceive them in that moment. and that is so special to me. i love people watching and observing every little thing about nature, that be people, animals, plants, you name it. i love that you can be reading all of this, know this much about me, while not knowing what i look like, who i have been, who i ever will be. while people i call my own friends don’t even know this about me.
this parts gonna be short, but just so you know, i struggle with paranoia, depression, social anxiety (diagnosed/told by therapists or doctors)
i’m not sure of any other mental illnesses
i also have a history of eating disorders, self harm, and suicidal tendencies
this blog i’ll either repost things i like, random thoughts, or i might post some vents, so for the venting part i just wanted to let you know of my past because that is what it may involve. any vent i post i’ll put a tw, so yk in case any of that triggers you!!
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