leave-eddie-alone
the bangs that bang the bangers
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leave-eddie-alone · 2 months ago
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18+
Summary: Eddie considers his feelings and the chances he needs to take.
Warnings: Language, & alludes to smut.
A/N: Just a little something, cause’ I missed him.
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“You know,” it’s said through a pause, wisp of smoke sizzling between milky whites, before it’s continued, “I love having time with you.”
You give one short snort, tilting yourself towards the man to your right. Shaking your head, you deadpan. “Well, considering we’ve been doing it for almost a year now, I would hope so.”
A picture of perfection in your eyes, is what you see. He’s on his stomach, curly hair in disarray, sweat glistening through his curls from previous activities. With a cigarette in one hand, the other splayed palm flat on his notebook he’d been scribbling in. He’s still naked to match you, a feast that you allow yourself to indulge in. His scars from death’s door two years ago, they remain, but blend with his ink - old and new.
Eddie Munson is watching you look at him, something he will never be used to experiencing. You make him feel like he’s the creator of the universe and you’d happily accept any fate he’d give you, what treasures he shall bestow upon you. It’s not just that you’re the only one that’s made him feel this way, it’s that it is you. And within the past year, all mind blowing sex aside - he’s fallen ass her elbow for you. Love for a Munson, that’s scarier than a thousand hive minds and a bat bite death all over.
If he lets you in, if you break his heart, Eddie doesn’t think he’ll survive this. But dammit, he craves to try. Do you feel this weird thing too? Or is it just sex? He’ll take fights, tears - every single bit of it just to have you. He hears Henderson and Harrington’s voices in his head.
Don’t waste anymore time.
Look what almost happened.
Dude, she’s been waiting for something for a long time, I think that something is you.
You’re as lost in him as he is in you, the dips in his hipbones that trail into the swell of his ass. Finding your regained solace back into the beckoning of his chocolate eyes. Big and wondrous, guiding you into seeing the world in new ways - you’re toe over tit for him.
Eddie swallows, stubbing out his cigarette as he coughs on a smoke wrapped confession. He levels with you, pinching your fingers into his own. He’s looking down when you push the curls from his face, patient and more beautiful than any princess Eddie’s imagination can ever create. You’re real, you’re here. He smiles softly, toothily, thumb finding your wrist bone to stroke.
You’re almost sure that he can feel your racing pulse point. He catches your attention once more with his words. “Not… Sweetheart, it’s not just the sex. As much as you blow my mind and my back out…” You both share a grin at the trail off.
You break in, noticing how over stimulated his confession is making him. You understand, you match. You take a deep breath and unfold. “I love having time with you too, Eddie.”
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leave-eddie-alone · 2 years ago
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Equilibrium (An Eddie Munson Fanfic)
Summary: There’s fresh blood in the water and the shark tank of Hawkins is just salivating to tear the new meat to shreds. Though this one isn’t quite as defenceless as the others. This one has teeth of her own. 
Genre: Romance / Thriller / Sci-Fi
Tags: Fluff / Angst (maybe more)
Ship: Eddie Munson x Fem!OC
High school. 
What an idea. 
Put a bunch of unstable hormonal almost-children in a closed and sterile environment to be shaped by obsolete ideas and pressured into a certain pigeon hole to ensure you have a future. 
Truly a marvellous invention, that.
It's a strange sight to see, even from the safe distance of the parking lot. There are so many colours and patterns and different outrageous hairstyles, some of which border on inconvenient. There's all sorts of noises, like giggling, screaming, groaning, car honking, and the general walla of large crowds.
I should go inside.
Fuck.
I have to go inside.
Small tentative steps, one at a time, I made my way to the front doors of the suffocating-looking building, and glanced through the glass. 
There's so much more noise inside these walls, colours seem unnaturally bright, the noise is echoed, bounced back and multiplied, and those bright synthetic white lamps are not helping.
"Excuse me, we're trying to get through." a high voice near me interrupted my downward spiral. It was slightly passive-aggressive but to be fair I was blocking the entrance. 
"Yes, sorry." I barely turned to the girl as I stepped aside to let her through, though I did see a mop of golden blonde hair with a bow on top.
Pretty.
I finally gathered the courage to step through the aquarium doors as well, and oh stars, was it so much worse then I could have possibly conceptualised. 
The bouncing and reverberating and mixing of all of that uncontrolled noise made me queasy, breathing picking up, the tips of my fingers tingling with the rise of adrenaline levels.
One foot in front of the other. Come on. You've been through worse. 
Yeah, but that other stuff was survival instinct, this is worse. 
My own mental bickering was not helping the fact that I was just about shaking by the time I got to, what I was told is, the school secretary office.
She was supposed to give me… something or other, I wasn't sure, Dad mentioned it, but I could hardly follow everything he said after he dropped the bigger news.
"Oh, hey." chipper, high-pitched, grating, "You must be Gwendalyn." 
"Just Gwen." I respond, my voice slightly raspy from misuse. I finally raised my eyes to look up at the woman. She looked young, prim and proper, though weighed down by stress. There were tiny darkened circles under her eyes, though mostly covered by whatever dry powdery substance she'd covered her skin with.
"Well, Gwen, I can tell you're slightly nervous, but there's no need. We're very hospitable here in Hawkins." 
I could tell she genuinely believed what she said, this wasn't some lie she was maliciously spreading, but it was still a lie. In the week I'd been in town, everyone was always turning to me, staring, murmuring, gossiping, and then there were the mean comments I'd heard about myself just today in the parking lot.
My silence probably ticked her off slightly, but I sincerely couldn't think of anything to say.
I must learn how to engage in small talk. I'm drawing more attention to myself like this.
"Okay!" she broke the awkward silence I initiated with an even more chipper and artificial noise, starting to pull out some papers and things I had yet to see, "So, I'm just gonna give you your schedule and class list, so you can get on with your first class for the day, okay?" 
I simply nodded. 
"Okay!" she seemed to be getting more and more unnerved by the second and I struggled to see why. "So, your first class is English with Ms O'donnell, and her classroom is just down the hallway, then to the left, third door on your right, okay?" 
Is this a coping mechanism she has or is it something else?
I nodded again. 
"Okay!" it finally sounded like some of the tension in her voice was dispersing, "You have a good day, Gwen!" she was eager to get me out of that room, though she remained polite, or fake maybe, who knows. 
"Thanks, you too." 
Forward, to the left, third door.
I repeated this like a mantra in my head as I dodged the numerous bright and colourful students of all shapes and sizes, trying to not lose sight of my objective.
Forward, to the left, third door. 
Forward, to the left, third door. 
Smack! 
Someone pushed my shoulder from behind with such force I was shocked I didn't fall. My arms threw out in front of me, dropping all the things I was holding, which was only just a few papers realistically.
"Sorry!" some other feminine voice shouted, just as a bell rang, making all the other students scurry like mice in a maze.
Isn't that the same mop of blond ringlets from this morning? Why was she behind me, she went in before I did? Maybe this school has indeed a maze-like structure and she'd just gone someplace else.
I managed to quickly pick up my things, just to see the hall almost deserted. In the span of maybe two minutes I'd needed to recompose myself, the white synthetically-lit halls had cleared like a beach after a shark sighting. 
Forward, to the left, third door.
And now I'm late, and everyone will stare.
As if they weren't already. 
The door clicked open and prayed to the stars that this was the right one.
"Ah, you must be the new girl!" 
That sounded about right.
I nod, hardly looking the middle-aged woman in the eyes. Though I could tell they were very warm and gentle, there's nothing to fear with this one.
"Well, you go on and take a seat, okay? There's one over there in the back." the tulip sleeves of her big billowing shirt lifted to point at a single chair and desk at the back.
Well, that is something, I wouldn't have to pretend not to feel eyes on me the whole time.
Though I could feel the eyes on me as I walked between desks towards the back of the room.
I sat down on the small restrictive chair that didn't seem to be made for an almost-adult, and pulled out a pen and a notebook.
Like a good little mouse.
Though I could hardly focus. By the time I'd halved the class, the first page of my notebook was entirely covered in ink, as was part of my hand, but who cares. 
Ms. O'Something said something about introduction to whatever and then started with her lesson, the class was mostly silent, and thank fuck for the grey but still bright weather outside, that those horrific white lights weren't needed.
"Would you like to continue, Miss Lloyd?" it wasn't a question. 
Shit, I hadn't been paying attention.
I don't even have my books out. Fuck, it's just the first day I can't be screwing up already!
She said something about Shakespeare in the beginning, I thought. Based on popularity, she probably started with Macbeth. Realistically, she couldn't have gotten that far into it.
"This is the sergeant
Who, like a good and hardy soldier, fought
 ’Gainst my captivity.—Hail, brave friend!
 Say to the King the knowledge of the broil
 As thou didst leave it."
She didn't seem displeased, per se, mildly impressed if anything, though slightly irritated.
"You missed Duncan's lines but overall… very good."
Good save! 
Dumb luck.
"An English accent helps as well." 
English. 
"I'm Welsh."
"Ah, like Cymbeline then." 
Is she testing me?
"More like Imogen."
Her lips drew together in a somewhat impressed mouth-shrug as she turned to return to front of the classroom.
"It'd be a pleasure to have you in my class, Miss Lloyd."
Then she carried on with her lesson.
A deep, mocking chuckle next to me. Instinctually, I turned to follow the sound. It seemed to come from a boy, no, a man more like, with long frizzy hair and a leather jacket. He didn't see me looking, I don't think, but the sound of laughter felt almost like a stab wound.
Brilliant, it's literally the first class and I've already drawn far too much attention.
Once this Shakespearian nightmare was over, I tried to pick up my belongings as slowly as possible, no one would pay attention to the last in class, and I still needed to figure out where my next one was. I could probably ask for directions.
"Ah, Miss Lloyd, can I have a word?" the teacher's voice cut through the near silent room as the last stragglers scurried off to their next class.
Fuck me! This is it! The jig is up!
"Yes?" I mutter, voice lower than grass, as I approach her desk, leaving a foot of distance between us, stacked with all sorts of papers, books and assorted knick-knacks.
"I know this must be a huge shift for you, New country, new people, new school, especially at your age, but I want you to feel safe in my classes, and in this school." she took a deep breath, looking down at some of her papers before reinstating eye-contact,"I know your classmates may seem a bit on edge, maybe even hostile, but this town has been through a lot lately. Just…" she seemed to measure her words for a bit, “try to not take anything too personal.”
What the fuck kind of advice is that? What is she preparing me for?
Second period was Precalculus.
I refrained from asking for directions, she seemed on edge for some reason. I had to find it myself.
Well, at least that doesn’t require a lot of talking.
The path to my next class took loads of stumbling around rooms, looking at room numbers, dodging other students, some rowdy and cheerful, others with their heads down, just trying to get from point A to point B.
Room 164. 166. 168. Okay, but where the fuck is 173? On the other side of the building?
With my luck, I shouldn’t have been shocked that, yes, the room was indeed, on the other side of the building. The bell rang, everyone scurried off back to their designated places and I was, once more, stuck in the hallway, by myself. Though that did partially help, as it was somewhat easier to find the room numbers without a flurry of heads and colours in the way.
Here we fucking go…
Opened the door, stepped in, and waited for the teacher to acknowledge me so I could be seated. While everyone kept fucking staring.
“I don’t know what was like in your old school, Miss Lloyd, but we don’t tolerate tardiness here.”
Oh, is that right, cunt?
“I had trouble finding the classroom, sir.”
He finally turned to face me and I was greeted with the sight of an oily, lizardy-looking man with humongous glasses, that about tripled the size of his eyes, and one of these ugly “academic” sweater vests I despised looking at.
“I’ll overlook it this time, but let it not happen again.”
“Of course, sir, thank you.”
Knob.
His big glassy eyes, more akin to those of a rat than a human, attempted what I could only identify as an intimidation look, though his hollow skinny face made it look more like one caused by constipation.
“Take a seat.”
Once again, there was an open spot waiting in the back, and I began to think this may all be one gigantic setup. But, there was no point in arguing, so I just made my way to the back of the room, wide steps making haste of my walk amongst staring eyes. I hated this school already, and all these people, while I may not know them, they must know it’s rude to stare.
“So, class, this year we’ll be going into Precalculus.“ Mr. Knob’s nasally voice started droning on as I took my seat, drawing some of the attention away from me, “And we’re gonna dive right in with an introduction to functions and domain.”
Really? Huh, this may not be so bad after all.
“Miss Lloyd, has the United Kingdom taught you the magic of functions yet?”
So, that’s how it is, huh?
I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes, anxiety replaced with mild anger and distaste. This asshat would just pick on, what is virtually, a child just for kicks, it seemed. And as the freshest meat in the classroom, he chose me. He sure did seem like the type of pest to harass his juniors just to feed his own insecurities.
Well, fuck you, Mr. Rat, two can play this game.
“Yes, sir, a few years back.” I responded calmly, holding steady eye contact, unnerving as he may have been.
He seemed slightly surprised at this for some reason, and I could distinctly hear some of my new classmates murmur something.
“Then, I suppose you could tell us the types of functions there are.”
“On what base, sir?”
I could almost hear his teeth screech together, and honestly, if he’s afraid he’d been upstaged by a senior student, he deserved whatever humiliation he thought this would bring him.
“Domain.”
Stars, you test my patience.
“Algebraic, Trigonometric and Logarithmic, sir.” steady eye-contact was never my favourite but I was well prepared to hold it, though I was not entirely sure for how long.
“Hmm.” he scoffed through his crooked nose, “Right.” he turned once more to the blackboard with a piece of chalk in hand and started scribbling something that looked like a series of squiggles, “Well, for the rest of you, functions are the…”
Blah blah blah… whatever you say Mr. Rat…
I had a sense that me and this absolute bellend are only going to have more run ins throughout the year and, as satisfying as watching his face go red with anger was, it was probably going to get old very quickly.
I breezed through this one as well, no more condescending comments from this poor excuse of a teacher, though I wasn’t sure I was out of the woods yet. And that was simply good instinct.
The bell rang, everyone started picking up their stuff, and in less than a minute the room was mostly clear. And I thought, so was I.
“Miss Lloyd, do you mind if we have a chat?”
Twice in just two classes! Do I have a fucking ‘Pick on me!’ sign on my back or something?!
Once more, I approached the desk, I looked him dead in the eye, standing my ground, as much as I could while he’s holding all the cards.
I’m fucked.
“I don’t appreciate your attitude, Miss Lloyd.” he looked down at me from the slightly raised platform in front of the blackboard, silent anger clear as day in those cold blue eyes.
“Sir, I don’t understand-”
“Do not talk back, young lady!” had it been Dad using that tone, I may have shrunk into my frame, virtually caving in with the amount of disappointment and anger in that voice, but this man was a fucking weasel, and I refused to do so.
“She was just defending herself.” it was a male voice, deep but youthful, coming from somewhere behind me.
I turned and was greeted by the sight of long frizzy hair, black leather jacket and a multitude of different patches and pins on the denim vest over it. It took me a second to realise, judging by all of that, that this was the guy from English who’d found my knowledge of Shakespare so fucking funny.
And what does he want of me?
He looked odd, not exactly the type to jump to someone else’s defence or play good samaritan. He seemed to stand out from the rest of the crowd, his clothes were dark, torn in places, he wore loads of metal accoutrements, most of which seemed to be designed to look aggressive.
“This is none of your business, Mr. Munson. You are dismissed.” he was seething, that man. I could hardly grasp why - I get insecurity and being publicly defied, but this was something else entirely.
“Well, she’s my friend, and it’s her first day at Hawkins High, so it is kind of my business, Mr. Miller.”
So, that’s that rodent's name.
Wait, “friend”?!
Mr. Miller seemed to think it over for a second, and he finally dismissed us, me scurrying out of this place as quickly as I could without running, and that Munson character just calmly gliding by on his white sneakers, as if he had no worries in this world.
Once out in the hallway, the noise and flurry of motion actually seemed to calm me down for a bit. It was better than the alternative.
As I caught my breath from nearly being… well, I don’t know what, but it felt threatening, I saw that same volume of frizzy curls pass me by.
“Hey, wait!” I squeaked before I could second-guess myself.
He turned and I was suddenly greeted by the warmest charcoal eyes I’d ever seen. A smug, though not arrogant grin stood strong on his soft lips and his head tilted slightly as if in question.
“Yeah?”
“Uhm…” I hadn’t planned that far ahead, really, what was there to say, other than, “thank you. For…” I had no clue what to name it so I just pointed behind me to where the door to Mr. Miller’s classroom stood.
“It’s fine, he likes to pick on people, he’s just an ass.” he chuckled, almost to himself, while giving me a cheeky sideways smile.
“I figured as much.” I had no clue what to follow up with, but I supposed I should at least find out his name, “May I ask the name of my ‘friend’?”
He gave me a full laugh and a smile so infectious, I could hardly help the smile from spreading on my face as well.
“Eddie. Eddie Munson.” He outstretched his hand to me, and it took me a second to realise what he was offering, “And yours?”
I took his hand, it was firm and strong though he held mine gently, I could tell these thin fingers were trained in precision though I wasn’t sure what for, “Gwendalyn Lloyd. But I prefer Gwen.”
Despite his odd accessories, and what looked like religious paraphernalia, his eyes held no aggression, no anger, not even irritation.
Suddenly he made an elaborate gesture with his arm, then bowing deep, looking at the floor then back up at me.
“Such a pleasure to meet you, Gwen of Wales!”
I couldn’t help but give a small chuckle at his excessive, but humorous gestures.
“You can rise now, I’m not Diana.”
He rose from his bow, wearing a comically confused expression on his, admittedly handsome face.
“Who’s Diana? You got a sister?” he seemed genuinely curious and that made it all the more hilarious.
Of course they don’t know about Princess Diana, this is America. Only the English can be fucked to care about the royals!
“No, I do not.”
And then suddenly I remembered I had somewhere else to be.
“Shit, I have to-” but then a thought hit me. I still didn’t know where I was going, I didn’t know the building or the grounds, and he seemed friendly enough, “Actually, could I bother you with one more thing?”
His expression shifted, though I couldn’t tell how, his brows furrowed slightly and his head tilted even further to the side.
“Yeah, what’s up?”
“Uhm, I need to find my next class, and I struggle to tell anything apart in this building with everything being so…” I didn’t want to say anything too insulting, as he may actually really enjoy this building, and I didn’t want to aggravate him.
“Samey? Monotonous? Like one of those mazes you put mice in?” he suggested, and I could not have asked the stars for a better first friend. 
“Yes, that.” I giggled shamefully, looking down at the tiled floor.
“Sure, I know this school better than I want to.” Well, maybe he doesn’t actually enjoy it here… “What’you got next?”
“Uhm,” I gracelessly mumbled, looking down at the schedule and class sheet I was handed just some short hours ago, “I’ve got… History with Mr… Brown. Says here room 245.” It all came out like a question, like I was unsure of myself, which was not completely false.
“Oh, yeah, sure, I’ll show you.”
Just like that?
“Really?” I asked back, confused as to why he’d waste his time on me.
“Yeah, I told you, it’s like a mouse-maze in here.” So I figured, “Come on.” he nodded his head towards a flight of stairs and started walking, leading me to what I was hoping was just a class where I would not be harassed and picked on. Until a thought hit me.
“Wouldn’t you be late for your next class though?”
He chuckled sincerely at that, confusing my perception of his character even more. What’s so funny about that?
“Nah,” he dismissed out of hand, “I’ll be fine.” There seemed to be something he wasn’t saying but I felt it may be inappropriate to pry.
Eddie showed me the second floor every once in a while throwing in little commentary like ‘Here’s so and so’s Biology classroom, where they teach you to torture frogs.’ or ‘This is the spot where horny couples get some alone time’. He seemed to have the whole school figured out, and he’d somehow turned into my very own tour guide around Hawkins High. There was much to learn from this boy Eddie.
“This is it.” he finally stopped in front of a basically empty classroom with the door wide open where a very tall and young man with one of those stupid sweater vests was scribbling something on a blackboard.
“Thanks again, for… everything.” I couldn’t tell why I was suddenly getting bashful, but his warm gaze felt curious, exploratory, though not invasive. How strange.
“No problem, Gwen of Wales."
Well, he's a charmer.
Shut up!
And he turned on his heel and left just as the bell rang.
The rest of the day I'd had no issue finding my classrooms, Eddie had been nice enough to show them to me as we passed them on our way to Mr Brown's. Lunch was an event, however. Meaning, it was 30 minutes, I'd spent on the trimmed field outside the school building, running over my notes from the day. I hadn't brought a book with me, I hadn't thought I'd need one.
"You know," the sudden voice startled me, nerves on end, adrenaline running once more, until I turned to the source and found who else, "if I didn't know better I'd think you were stalking me."
A strained chuckle escaped me at that, due to my body still being tense for battle, and looked out at the field once more, to avoid his far-too-perceptive charcoal eyes.
"On the contrary," I croak out, voice once more low from misuse, "you've shown you know your way around school, know all the spots, how do I know you weren't the one following me?"
He scoffs humorously at that, eyes rolling theatrically, as he made to sit down by me, about a foot's distance between us.
"Ya got me there. I could totally be stalking this weird new girl I find" his tone changed to an even more dramatic and comedic one and I am loath to say, it worked, "so very fascinating."
Another stab of fear shot through my stomach and trying to maintain my grin became a battle. I gave a humourless scoff, worry and anxiety starting to bubble underneath my skin.
"Nothing fascinating about me."
That was a slip up and a half.
Fuck, I hope not!
My anxiety picked back up at the thought he had picked up on my far-too-quick response. I was being far too suspicious, and that may cost me my life if I didn't reign myself in.
He didn't seem to find my response and immediate guilty look down at the ground unnerving, however. He just scoffed humorously, and in my peripheral vision I picked up a mop of messy curls shaking left and right.
"Whatever you say, Casper."
Huh?
"I…" I wasn't sure how to respond, but I thought a clarification was in order, "It's Gwen." I mumbled once more, unsure if he'd at all bothered to remember my name. The thought somewhat stung, though I wasn't sure why.
He seemed to take in my sombre mood and doubt-filled gaze and for whatever reason, found that hilarious. A burst of laughter broke out of him, seemingly powerful enough to make him double over with mirth. It felt like it went on for a while and at a point I started wondering if he was laughing at something I said or at me. And while I'd only just met the lad I didn't love the idea of being his laughing stock.
He shook off the remainder of his laughter and looked at me again, once he'd regained his composure. And then the mirth and joy left his eyes, replaced with confusion. 
"Wait." he mumbled, as if unsure himself what to say, "You serious?". The joy and laughter in his face quickly morphed into shock and confusion. Uncertainty gripped my heart once more, afraid that my utter oblivion to anything outside my own little bubble had shown me up to be a fraud. Though through rising fear, I prodded him, best to know what it is I’d missed so I can perhaps try and isolate the issue.
“Serious about what?”
He hastily stooped from his standing position to sit down on the bench facing my way with giant brown eyes that exuded warmth even in the chilly september noon.
“You’ve never seen Casper the Friendly Ghost?!” exasperated and excited simultaneously, he stared long and unwavering into my eyes, as if I’d admit that, yes, this was all a trick. So I pressed on, hopeful in finding a way to cover up that inadvertent disclosure.
“No, I have not. Why?”
“What do you mean ‘Why’?!” he waved his hands around dramatically, “It’s like an iconic show from the 40s’?!”
I was starting to think that maybe this wasn’t as serious as his theatrically exaggerated expressions made it out to be.
“And?”
He shook his head as if in disbelief or perhaps to ‘shake off’ the shock my statement had put him in, all the while his wide charcoal eyes never moved away from mine.
“And?! Where were your parents in the mornings if you’ve never seen Casper? That’s like… quintessential to a child’s development or whatever!”
‘Parents’. Well, there’s the big word of the day…
“They were busy.” at that point I was more than sure that whatever this minor drama was could not possibly ruin my whole plan, and would hopefully be shut down quickly. I simply didn’t want to engage in that conversation anymore. I was hoping that perhaps my distant response would be enough to make him disengage the topic without freezing him out completely. He was, after all, my only ‘friend’.
“Oh.” Eddie looked down towards the bench as if ashamed, “Sorry. Didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”
That was far from the response I expected. Oddly comforting to know that if I wanted to avoid a topic he’d allow it in the name of my comfort.
“It’s alright.” I mumble in response, unsure of what else to say, though still feeling slightly anxious from the emotional trip I’d just experienced.
Eddie’s eyes suddenly jumped back to mine, reinvigorated with new electrifying energy.
“Hey, I’ve got an idea!” he jumped back up on his feet, arms stretching out in an exaggerated welcoming gesture, “Why don’t you sit with us tomorrow? You know, since you’re new, and seem to need some guidance through the hellhole that is Hawkins High.”
Only one thing struck me as significant.
“Us?”
“Oh, yeah. Me and the other boys from Hellfire.”
“Hellfire?” I repeat.
“Yeah, it’s our Dungeons & Dragons club.”
“Dungeons and dragons?” I repeat once more, getting progressively more perplexed by the second. Whatever it was he was talking about, it sounded mystifying and terrifying simultaneously.
What are the odds that my only ‘friend’ is an occultist?
At my repeated shock and awe of his response, something seemed to dawn on Eddie and he suddenly regarded me with a sceptical look.
“You’re not gonna freak out about it, right? I mean, it’s just a game.” his voice dropped a notch from the warm and exciting tone he’d spoken about that Kasner thing and his club with. Whatever he was talking about must have been important to him somehow, and he was getting defensive.
“I…” how do you respond to that? I can’t say I’m fine with whatever he’s talking about - I don’t know what it is… “have no idea what you’re talking about.” So, complete honesty it is…
“Oh.” his eyes shifted for a second, pinned to the yellowing grass of the field, faraway in contemplation, “So, you haven’t heard the rumours?”
“What rumours?”
The boy perked up at that, excitement suddenly invading his system again, and he sat back down by me, once more regarding me with curiosity and intrigue.
“Oh, nothing.” he skimmed past the previous topic as if he hadn’t just been so riled up about it. “So?” he clapped his hands, and gave another wide smile, “ Will you be joining us for lunch tomorrow, Gwen of Wales?”
I need to blend in, and to blend in, I need my own… clique? So…
“I don’t see why not.” I smiled back, hopefully well enough to cover up how anxious the idea of being surrounded by so many people at once was.
Returning home after class was a sordid affair in and of itself. The wet roads and chilling wind of early October made the walk from the large brick building towards the outskirts of town slightly uncomfortable, but the constant glances, murmuring, the noise, the traffic made it absolutely unbearable. Either that or the weight of what was to come.
Dad always said to not delay or neglect my duties as that would make them even harder to complete. He said that the walk through an unpleasant chore may sometimes be worse than a sprint through Hell. I’m not sure if this sort of after-class engagement fits the definition of an unpleasant chore, but it surely felt like a slow and endless drag through a fury-cold pit even before it had begun.
I dutifully marched through the cold and wet woods as the sky was preparing to cleanse the earth once more with an icy drizzle of rain, so I needed to hurry. Down the stony lane, over the threshold and through the door, waiting for me was the cold, dark empty chasm of an almost abandoned cabin. I dropped my belongings, or what I called ‘my belongings’, onto the dusty wooden floor and a small cloud raised in the process.
Huh. I might need to do some more cleaning. I’m not a savage after all.
Slow but steady steps lead me through the small cabin only partially lit by the rising moon behind the clouds. I end up in the small garden behind the cabin. It was overgrown and unkempt, it needed attention more than anything though there are the signs of crops planted by a long-forgotten owner. It had potential, it just needed some care.
Off towards the creek, my shoes made small steps as if to prevent me slipping on the wet and muddy forest floor. There by the waterside lay my unpleasant chore.
“Good night, Dad.”
That night the soft and slow cracking of fire, the smoke rising into the heavens, the stench of burning life was disguised by the rain.
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