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oh and that gap in my resume is when i was digging my own grave

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i am about to bestow upon you the secret butter technique. i am sorry, but it is french. i am sorry again, this only works with cow butter. i am certain plant based butters wouldn’t work, and alternative animal butters may or may not work

has this ever been you: you have a nicely steamed vegetable, or maybe you want to make the best butter noodles, but you know that if you put butter on those it’ll just melt and you end with kind of greasy noodles or vegetables? don’t you wish it was instead a luscious buttery glaze?

introducing: beurre monté

you will take a small sauce pan, and begin heating it with 1-2 tablespoons of water (use very little water) and bring it to a hard simmer or boil

turn the heat down slightly, and add Butter. how much? however much you dare. (start with 3-4 tablespoons and go from there)

you are going to either whisk Aggressively or you can pick up the saucepan, still holding it over the heat, and swirl aggressively so the butter is skating around the sides of the pan

done correctly, you will have liquid butter that is still emulsified. you have made Butter Sauce. season it with a little salt, and toss whatever you want in it.

if you’re butter splits, i’m sorry. you didn’t agitate it enough to maintain the emulsion, and now you have melted butter.

you can use this knowledge to make other sauces by swapping out the water for another liquid. white wine becomes beurre blanc. red wine is beurre rogue.

you want to CUM? sweat minced shallot in a tiny bit of butter, add white wine and cook it out until it’s reduced by about half. then whisk butter in hard. a few flecks of minced thyme or fennel frond stirred thru, and you eat that with a nice seared fish? or scallop? or even shrimp? wow. you will Nut

your boxed mac and cheese game can also be elevated by cooking your pasta and making a beurre monté first, tossing your pasta in that and adding the cheese packet. wow. hey; you’ll cum

go forth now with this butter secret

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Down a Rabbit Hole I Went

I screwed up. I didn't think that using an ancient language on a piece of tumblr merch was necessary but I forgot what site I was on :) . This is tumblr, of course it has to be in linguistically accurate cuneiform. I went and hired an expert on Ancient Semitic Languages and Cultures. There aren't as many as you'd think that are willing to translate text for an internet gag so I'm so happy I found Paul.

Notes on the translation from the translator:

I used the ventive suffix on the imperative "give (rib+am)" which is a special feature of Akkadian that indicates the motion of direction. It makes it a little bit more authentic. The longer version actually includes the words "to me (ana iasim)", but a typical Akkadian speaker probably wouldn't have needed to say that.

Also, for the word "money" I used the Sumerian (KUG.BABBAR) instead of spelling out the Akkadian, because that was a common feature in Akkadian scribal writing. For the font I was happily surprised that Google has a Cuneiform font, so not only is it correct but it looks pretty neat too. Right now you can buy both versions in the shop but cuneiform version won't ship for a week or so as I have to order new stock with the new design.

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This is the absolute worst. I hate wasting my food but I never know how much I will be able to eat and I hate leftovers more than I hate the food the first time. I’m lucky my mom likes leftovers so she can eat anything I can’t (or unlucky, if she’s trying to get me to eat leftovers myself).

another one of the worst things abt arfid is the food waste that inevitably happens. it's hard to tell how much you can eat when your appetite is so fucked up.

there can be like a hundred different reasons why i can't finish whatever i'm eating. i cant always predict if im actually hungry enough to finish it or if i just feel that hungry. i already know i have a small stomach, but i always feel horrible about any food thats leftover. it WOULD be easy to go "save it for later" but i guarantee that 99% of the time when i put it in the fridge and then heat it up in the microwave, i won't be able to eat it.

if i know i couldn't finish something, i'd really prefer to just decline it completely and stay hungry. idk if thats the anxiety or not but it Really sucks. the fear of wasting food and the guilt that comes with it tends to outweigh my desire to eat

at the very least, i feel really proud of myself when i do finish my food. being in the 'clean plate club' is always difficult for me, so when i acually am able to do it, i'm pretty happy (and lowkey want whoever's with me to appreciate that i was able to do it too lol)

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I swear 90% of my diet is chocolate because it’s one of the few things I can always eat.

God I'm so so tired of eating the exact same shit every day 😔 Why can't I eat like a normal person

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Meow Are You? Vegetarian Willpower

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Same. My brother was getting after the rest of my family for using our phones while we ate and my mom and I had to explain to him that if I’m distracted while eating then I’m not thinking about the fact that I’m eating and I eat more.

I have to watch videos or listen to podcasts while eating because otherwise I’ll be too aware of the tastes and textures in there

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Monday February 20.

Aromantic Awareness Week!

It's Aro Week! This one is a bit special, folks. Today, for #aromantic Awareness Week, we are celebrating all things aromantic. This one is for you mighty fine folk. Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week (ASAW) is a week to spread awareness and acceptance of aromantic spectrum identities, the issues the community faces, and not to mention a chance for the community to celebrate their experiences and existence! ASAW generally occurs the first full week (starting Sunday) following Valentine’s Day. It was conceived, in large part, as a way for those in the aromantic community who had difficulty finding space for their experiences in such a universally romanticized event to come together and celebrate their own unique experiences.

Here at Tumblr, our community is doing what it does best and marks Aro Week with its winning combination of pizzazz, thoughtfulness, and good humor. You can check it out below or catch the latest over at #aromantic.

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I honestly prefer third person limited, although I'm flexible if it fits the story and is done well. Generally speaking, it just feels weird to visualize the story when it's in first or second person. Then again I'm pretty sure that's something I've only recently developed. When I went back and reread Percy Jackson I was surprised it was in first person and that was one of my favorite series for a really long time.

Mind telling me why in the replies/tags?

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I have 6-7 and am beginning to question my sanity. I'm curious how much of Tumblr shares my addiction.

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For humanity to progress towards a sustainable world with a secure food supply, the data now clearly show that we must change diets, reduce waste, diversify food systems — in existing or reduced agricultural land — and develop more-circular ways to produce food. It is also becoming apparent that ‘climate-smart’, environmentally sustainable food sources can come from underutilized plants and wild relatives of crop plants. Efforts to locate and manipulate such food sources should be guided by the communities who have long been using them, and who might be the main beneficiaries. (Most current work on crops largely entails mapping and editing genes and their functions in only a few dozen species.)

Bananas are one example. The seemingly incurable fungal infection Panama disease is affecting dense banana plantations across the tropics, posing a major threat to the global trade of bananas, which is currently dominated by the Cavendish variety. Yet the disease does not affect crops in Africa and southeast Asia, where Indigenous and local communities grow hundreds of varieties that are naturally resistant to it. In Uganda alone, nearly 100 varieties of banana contribute to the sustainable livelihoods of millions of people.

Likewise, the plant enset, also called the tree against hunger (Ensete ventricosum), is hardly known outside southwestern Ethiopia. But in this region, where it has probably grown for millennia, its starch-filled stems provide more than 20 million people with their main source of calories and nutrients. Its leaves are used to feed cattle, to provide shade and to build roofs; the stems provide fibres for basket-making; and when planted in rows, enset is used in place of fences to define land ownership and reduce conflicts. Perhaps most importantly in relation to climate change, enset is remarkably tolerant of drought and short-term temperature variations.

Almost 500 million Indigenous people, speaking at least 4,000 languages, occupy more than 25% of the global land surface. They often have the best ecological knowledge about the region they live in, and know which species are most important for their communities. They also hold taxonomic knowledge that has been neglected by scientists from elsewhere.

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REblog if you are Asexual, support Asexuals, or spend most of your time actually thinking about Superheroes.

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AKA my favorite fanfiction genres

By Tom Gauld

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You are not just here to fill space or be a background character in someone else’s movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us.

David Niven (via quotemadness)

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Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do

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Let’s raise children who won’t have to recover from their childhoods.

Pam Leo (via quotefeeling)