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kitten-keith · 4 years ago

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Am I dreaming (Or is it a NiGhTmArE)

Klance, NSFW, Long and ridiculous. (26 pages, 8k+ words)

The first fourteen pages are probably... 2 years old? Three years old? Idk when did I first write Cargo Pilot... whatever, like a month before Cargo Pilot old. Then I added to it while half asleep. Then I added to it while kinda drunk. Then I added to it while half asleep and kinda drunk. And got REAL tired of it so here you go. (((I’m LAUGHINGGGG I drafted this POST at the end of Julyyyyy. Okay, so a little more sleepy scribbling a while back until I wrote the most RIDICULOUS end twenty seconds ago. Okay have fun.))) But yes this is the one that’s based on that one art piece I’m in love with from that one artist who apparently doesn’t have the art up anymore so -sadness-

Tenses are all over the place. No beta, we die like men. I stg though this is a mess and I’d be sorry but I just can’t be bothered to care rn.

This was post finding Shiro but Keith was still flying black.

Keith and Lance are sort of... dancing around each other. Things are stressful. And Awkward. And the sexual tension is real. Lance may not understand it all that well and Keith is suffering.

---

Finding Shiro again was supposed to be the end of their problems. Zarkon was down, Lotor was a threat, sure but with Shiro back it should be easy. With Shiro back at the helm where he was supposed to be Keith could—

…What? Go back to red?

Uproot Lance who would then have to go back to blue as if Allura wasn’t built for this?

Keith shook his head, the fighting drone landing its blade hard against Keith’s as he almost failed to block. All of that just. Didn’t need to be a priority right now. Keith could stay in the castle, coordinate with the blade, work some solo missions. It would be fine.

No, the bigger issue, the pressing problem was just…

Lance. In general. His existence was a problem.

Lance who was staring at him just across the training room right now. Lance whose deep blue eyes were starting to make Keith really sweat. Why did he have to just… Stand there…?

“End training sequence,” He breathed out to the drone before wiping his face with the bottom of his shirt and tilting his head to look back at Lance who was looking slightly off.

When Lance didn’t seem to realize Keith’s attention was on him, he dropped his shirt back to how it was and turned completely, facing Lance with a hunched shoulder and an elongated neck. He wasn’t the best at social cues, but he was pretty sure this translated to normal people as “What gives?”

With this Lance finally blinked up at Keith’s face and then immediately looked away, tongue darting along his nice thick lips before he spoke, “Ah. Sorry. Was I bothering you?”

Not in the way you’d think, Keith wanted to say, but was too winded from the drone to think that was a good idea so instead he offered the simpler, “Nah, just wondering if you needed something.”

Lance shook his head no before glancing around and thinking better of it, “Actually. Would you maybe. I don’t know. Be cool with teaching me some stuff?”

Keith took several quick paces forward, staring straight into Lance’s face as the other boy’s eyes widened and he backed into the wall. It wasn’t possible. There was no way he’d heard Lance right.

“…You want to spar with me?” He hoped he didn’t sound as excited as he felt but he really couldn’t help the small upturn of his lips.

Lance never wanted to spar with him. Never really wanted to do anything with him at all. Sure, things had gotten better since the lion switch in that when it came to Voltron Lance was sweet and understanding and all manner of helpful. He was a support that Keith desperately needed, the hand on his shoulder, something Keith would probably treasure for the rest of his life.

But beyond that… Well, Lance was his usual distant self.

Keith still caught him looking from time to time. Still caught those little smiles and those bubbled laughs whenever Keith would stumble on something he figured was supposed to be more normal than he was used to. And god, those were great. But Lance still didn’t really… Spend time with him.

Keith tried, often. He tried to sit in the rec room with him and he tried to ask him to spar, hell he offered to take him on a ride in Red once, show him what made the lion really tick but that had been taken poorly to put it simply.

Lance just. Didn’t respond well to any of it. He always ended up talking quickly and moving too much and getting weird and shrill and it just—

Keith wasn’t good with people. He got it. That much he was fully aware of. But he thought. Well, he’d definitely gotten better at it. At least, everyone but Lance seemed to be fully aware of the fact Keith had been flirting with him since they got sent into space. His cues weren’t that off. Of course, he’d dialed it back a bit when Lance started to actively pull away. But he still just thought they were better. That things were better.

But they just never seemed to prove it.

Until now.

Keith could feel his heart pounding in his chest while he waited for Lance to answer. The longer it took the more anxious he felt. Was he coming on too strongly? Was Lance about to run away again?

Please don’t please don’t please—

Lance’s previously tense expression melted off his face and he slowly raised his hand to Keith’s, his mouth turning up at the corners just like Keith had previously tried to keep his from doing. But Lance’s smile was just so incredibly stunning? So much nicer than Keith’s smile if you asked him.

Lance’s smile had the power to light up the whole damn castle, blue eyes sparking with so much energy and warmth and love for his whole intergalactic family. Keith noted only tentatively that he was supposed to be part of that otherwise his chest would combust.

And here he was, smiling right at him after asking to spar with him.

Did Keith go down? Did the drone knock him out? Was he actually a crumpled mess on the floor of the training room dreaming this whole thing?

He didn’t even realize Lance’s fingertips were brushing his cheek, so blinded and distracted by his beautiful fucking face.

“W-wow, does it make you that happy…?” Lance mumbled, the smile still on his face while his eyes crinkled at the corners. “I mean, man, if I knew you were going to make that face I would have—”

“Would have…?” Keith isn’t sure why he spoke. He isn’t sure where he got the goddamn nerve to speak and ruin a moment that was almost fucking perfect. But he did, and Lance froze up suddenly and retrieved his hand and did that stupid evasive awkward laugh.

“Anyway, I was just wondering if you could show me some blocks?” Lance offered again, walking past Keith and onto the training floor.

Keith withered in his spot, trying to quickly assess what just happened and finding that his brain did nothing helpful beyond short circuit.

“Ah—Right. Right. Okay I can do that. Blocks are easy. But. You’re long range. Why would you…err… want to know this?” Keith said finally, turning around to face Lance again though his tongue felt like fucking cotton. (Why it couldn’t have felt like that earlier when Lance’s soft fingertips were brushing his skin was anyone’s bloody guess.)

Lance shrugged his shoulders and stared up at the ceiling, “Well you never really know, I should learn how to fight short range too. At least how to defend anyway. Blocks. Grapples. That kind of stuff.”

Keith figured he had a point and conceded, “Okay. Do you want to train with a bot and take direction or would you prefer to go against me?”

At that, Lance laughed a bit and Keith had to remind himself to stay in the moment, “I would hope you would take it easier on me than a bot would.”

“Do you want me to take it easy on you?”

Keith bit his lip. Lance blinked at him a couple times before casually shrugging it off. Keith had no idea where that tone of voice came from and figured it was entirely unnecessary. Besides, Lance clearly didn’t notice or care.

“Dude, try not to trash me okay?” Lance clarified before taking up a stance. “Alright, let’s go.”

Judging from his stance already, Keith figured they’d be at it a while.

---

Keith wasn’t wrong.

And about twenty minutes into reminding Lance to keep himself steady or be knocked over Keith decided it was time to teach by example.

Lance landed flat on the ground and Keith hovered over him, one hand on his shoulder, one leg tangled with Lance’s as he’d struggled to stay up, the other between Lance’s knees.

“See? I kept telling you—”

“Yes, yes you did. I know. I know…”

Lance rolled his eyes from his position on the ground and Keith felt his chest warm slightly at the childish aspect of it. He might have smiled again. He wasn’t sure.

He lowered his gaze to Lance’s collar for a second, watching a bead of sweat dampen his shirt, before glancing up and noticing Lance’s eyes on him. That bright almost electric blue so beautifully piercing right into Keith’s soul that it made it difficult to remember what they were doing.

Thankfully, Lance offered him a verbal reminder, “So. Let’s just keep this going then. If you’re pinned by an enemy like this, is there a way to get out of their hold?”

Keith swallowed and glanced down at their legs, “Uh… Yeah. Yeah there’s a way. There’s usually a way. Can you figure it out for yourself though? Just to see if you ca-AHN—”

Lance grinned as Keith spoke, apparently having figured out a way already. He pulled on the leg that had gotten tangled with his and yanked Keith to the side, pushing him over and quickly repositioning himself similar to how Keith had previously been, though unlike Keith he’d pressed his leg down, ankle crossed on top of Keith’s to hold it in place.

Keith almost laughed, “You see that? That strength your applying with your foot right now. If you weren’t so light on your feet you wouldn’t go down so easy.”

Lance grinned and leaned down so his face was only a few very short inches away from Keith’s, one arm bent and pressing almost softly down on Keith’s neck to keep him further locked in place.

“Guess I just needed the incentive.”

Keith wasn’t sure why, but his throat felt very dry very suddenly. The way Lance had said that, eyes soft as he leaned over him, a vaguely coy smile on his lips…

Oh boy.

This was a pretty compromising position they were in, wasn’t it?

Why did he have to notice?

Why did he have to notice why did he have to notice whyyyy did he have to noticeeeee!!!

Now all he could think about was the placement of Lance’s knee, the strength in his hands, the proximity of his beautiful fucking face—

Keith was definitely sweating now. God he must smell. And look like a bloody goddamn mess fuck.

“So, can you break out of this?” Lance mumbled, a slight quirk in his brow.

Keith didn’t know how to respond so he tried to look at their positions and tried to think of a way to get the upper hand instead. Battle tactics came way easier to him after all. So.

…Ah god he really couldn’t think of anything.

He reached a hand up to Lance’s arm, unsure what he was going to do with it but hoping he’d figure it out by the time they made contact.

He didn’t.

So he settled for resting his fingers on Lance’s bicep and breathing through his nose.

“Must have landed a little harder than I thought,” Keith explained, a crap excuse but an excuse nonetheless.

Lance chuckled, “Or maybe you just like being under me.”

Oh, for fucks sake.

Oh, for fucking fucks sake did he really just fucking say that?!

Nope. That wasn’t allowed. Lance wasn’t allowed to say things like that. Not like this. No.

Keith isn’t sure how he did it but Lance ended up on his back again as Keith pressed down against him, knee placed just a little too high, just a little more contact between their hips, just slightly less distance between their faces while he offered Lance a coy smile of his own.

“Actually, I prefer to be on top.”

If you asked him, Keith wouldn’t even be able to tell you where that voice came from either, but that voice made color flood into Lance’s cheeks and it made Keith feel powerful. So, he leaned towards Lance’s ear and used it again.

“And I think you look so much hotter on your back.”

Hell, if he got this kind of reaction every time he spoke like this Keith would spend the rest of his life doing so.

Lance. Fucking. Whimpered.

And Lance is a man of many questionable noises. He was a very animated creature and Keith honestly loved every stupid sound and inflection and dorky face and razzle dazzle hand gesture. But to hear Lance make that kind of noise while pinned beneath him in response to his saying what he’d just said—

Well, it went straight to his dick if he was being frank about it. Said dick that was trapped behind a couple of thin layers of clothing right on top of Lance’s so if Lance moved even the slightest muscle he would probably—

“H-hah… you said… you said hotter as in… you already think I’m hot.” Lance said; his word choice was clearly trying to remain casual, but his voice was higher, and he wasn’t looking directly at Keith as he spoke.

Hoping that if it was just ignored his inappropriate boner would leave him the fuck alone Keith decided to not only take the bait but be obvious as hell. Just, get it out there. If Lance still didn’t get it then by god, Keith might just have to crawl into his bed in the middle of the night and prove it to him.

“Yeah Lance, I do.”

Lance couldn’t help it then. He looked directly at Keith, eyes shining, cheeks flushing, one lip being almost tenderly pressed between teeth—oh god damn it why did Lance have to look like that.

Boner was not going away. Boner was not going away and Keith was about to find himself very mortified and very much scaring Lance the ever living fuck away.

“Uh-Uhm—I have to uhm—”

But it looked like he already was.

Keith almost felt his heart drop, but it was to be expected. He didn’t even know if Lance was into guys that way. Why hadn’t he remembered that? Compromising position. Just because Lance says stupid things doesn’t mean he means them. Don’t say stupid things back and then tell him you think he’s hot you’re being stupid.

This realization was not enough to kill the hard on though, and in his effort to get away, Lance brushed his hips right against him.

And Keith, for all the damned and cursed unfathomable reasons, let out his own tiny stifled moan at the contact.

Lance bolted. Hell, he was probably on the other side of the castle by the time Keith realized he was on his back staring at the ceiling. Honestly, he’d have to ask Lance how he broke his hold at some point. But that would be if Lance ever actually looked at him again.

And really, Keith probably should have been concerned about forming Voltron like this, but he was far too distracted by the fact that he’d definitely felt something press against him before Lance had managed to wrench himself free.

Because Lance had absolutely felt it too.

---

Lance was fucked. He was so unbelievably fucked.

For goodness sake, he was cursing.

Frick frack fiddlesticks FUCK my life.

Why had he done that? What made him think any of that would be a good idea? Sparring with Keith. Hell, the second he ended up on the floor he should have jumped ship but clearly, he was some kind of masochist for wanting to keep going.

And god Keith was just.

Keith was…!

When Lance asked him to spar and teach him things, that adorable smile lighting up his face— look, he knew it had been a bad idea but when Keith looked at him like that how the hell was he supposed to take it back?

And god, he’d reached out and touched him. He’d been so close. So, so, close to feathering his thumb over his bottom lip and that just wasn’t something friends did. Not that touching his cheek was something friends did either, but Keith hadn’t seemed to care and his eyes were just so bright they practically sparkled and his face was so open and soft and perfect he’d had to touch him—

Thankfully he eventually shook himself out of it before he did too much damage but looking back at it now, hah, child’s play to the bloody grave he’d just dug himself.

How did this happen? How did this happen?!

He bolted past the first door he could find and as soon as it shut he tapped the locking mechanism before eyeing his surroundings.

No one. An empty storage room. Good.

Good, now he can be completely utterly impossibly stupid in the privacy of his own empty storage room. Awesome. Just as planned.

—Nothing was planned, how did this happen!?

Well if he thought about it, he made it worse.

Keith’s adorable faces, his actual delight in being able to train together, his warm hands politely nudging him into place, those occasionally flushes of color if he got too close or seemed to skip over explanations in his head.

His hand gripped his thigh and itched to move upward, press against his crotch.

God, he made Lance want to flirt.

Keith made Lance want to do a lot of things really, but flirting was safe. Flirting was normal for Lance. Of course, not with him but… Lance figured; he could have made it work. He could have managed to play it off.

No big deal just rolling around on the ground and flirting with your extremely adorable insanely hot teammate who may or may not be attracted to you.

His hand slipped up, he nearly leaned his head back to just let himself go for it but quickly pulled his hand away and tightened it into a fist instead.

Lance wasn’t an idiot. He just… didn’t have a lot of faith.

Sure, Keith looked at him with those soft eyes a lot. And sure, Keith said some strangely encouraging things sometimes and clearly kept trying to spend time together but—

But it just didn’t make sense to Lance.

How could Keith—Perfect, beautiful, talented, Keith—brash, reckless, stubborn, proud as hell Keith—ever see anything real in Lance?

Ever want anything real from Lance?

Keith could have anyone he wanted. And there just. Wasn’t…

Maybe it was because of their current predicament, lost in space, stuck in close quarters. Maybe it was just because Lance was the closest to viable on the ship and that’s why Keith looked at him like that.

Though, Hunk was a hunk, with strong arms, radiating warmth and protectiveness, he could cook and he could probably bench press a lion (Okay maybe not the lions but maybe a small savanna lion? With a muzzle?)

But Hunk was straight. So maybe that was why Hunk was out.

Shiro? Shiro was probably the most beautiful man Lance had ever seen in his life, and Lance had to wake up and see Keith every single day. (Keith really was that tight second though.)

The explanation away from Shiro was simple though. Keith saw Shiro as a brother. Doi.

Allura? The most beautiful woman Lance had ever met to compare right up there to Shiro?

Well, that could easily be explained away by Keith simply being… well, not into girls. Which also knocked out Pidge though Lance saw Pidge like a little sister and was pretty sure the lot of them did.

No, if he looked at it like that, Keith’s taking an interest in Lance made sense… but it still just…

There was a huge unhappy part of Lance screaming that even if Lance were the last viable male in the universe Mr. Perfect Keith just couldn’t want him.

But if he did, if he did want him because he was the only person he could want… was that even a good thing?

Lance leaned his head against the locked door of the storage room and wondered.

Perfect Keith. Settling for him.

Nah.

Thankfully, it was that train of thought that finally killed the arousal Keith had fucking lit in his belly talking like that.

Shit. Keith was going to kill him.

Well. Two can play that game.

---

He found Keith a couple hours later laying on his stomach in the rec room, his head on his crossed arms as he held one hand out just enough to scroll up and down on his tablet.

If Lance didn’t know any better, he’d say Keith had attempted to hang out with Pidge and had gotten shot down because that was almost exactly how Lance looked when the same thing happened to him.

No matter, that wasn’t his objective.

His objective was to make Keith miserable.

“There you are, samurai.”

Keith’s head shot up and Lance imagined his neck must not have appreciated that.

Lance casually tossed himself over the back of the circular couch, so he was seated right next to Keith’s legs. The other boy’s crazy surreal violet eyes widened at the proximity. Clearly thrown by the fact Lance had sat himself down so close.

Good.

“L-Lance—I thought—Are you—ah…”

Lance raised a practiced eyebrow and shrugged before scooting closer to Keith, going so far as to lift Keith’s feet and pull his ankles over and onto his lap. Keith’s eyes practically bugged out of his sockets.

“I thought, are you, what?” Lance offered, a coy grin set on his face.

At this point Keith was twisting at the waist in what could only be an incredibly uncomfortable pose and Lance got to watch his Adam’s apple bob in his throat.

“Uhm… Lance… what are you—what are you doing?” Keith had to pause to lick his lips, all manner of flustered as Lance started to rub a hand up and down Keith’s calves.

“You have some really nice legs, you know that?”

Lance felt his chest warm up at the vision of Keith’s face deepening a lovely shade of rose.

He couldn’t even respond, he just made an odd croaking noise in his throat and it took everything in Lance to keep a straight face.

Also, because Keith was adorable, and Lance was definitely touching him and definitely about to say some shit he shouldn’t but where Lance’s pride was involved there could be no room for shame.

Or something like that.

Lance swore it made sense in his head.

So, he pressed on, massaging some very tense muscles through Keith’s leggings. Why did he even wear those leggings? Why didn’t Keith own a regular pair of pants like a normal human? Maybe Lance would actually be able to think sometimes if Keith just wore pants instead of these ass-hugging gifts from god.

Ah but that begged the question, were the leggings the gift, or was Keith’s ass the gift?

The real issues in life.

Lance momentarily considered reaching up to give him a light pinch but figured that would definitely wander into the realm of overkill and he wanted to survive the castle ship in order to die in a universe wide war okay. Imagine the stupidity. Paladin of Voltron, died from friendly fire after getting too handsy before he even made a dent in the empire.

Nah. Lance didn’t have a death wish.

He just wanted to watch Keith squirm in the way he’d made Lance squirm.

Pinning him to the ground, pressing against him, saying those things that he knew would get to Lance. He knew damn well what he’d been doing, and Lance wasn’t going down without a fight. And since Keith seemed content in using Lance to vent some pent-up frustration then maybe Lance could use that against him. Maybe Lance could really get some pay back when he said no.

Because he was going to say no.

He was absolutely going to say no.

Even as he traced circles into Keith’s thigh—oh when had he moved his hand up—no, he was going to say no.

He plastered a grin on his face and looked right at Keith’s—

And watched his flush deepen as he bit his lip, soft fleshy pink now puffy as if he’d been biting said lip for a bit of time already.

Oh man.

Lance was going to say “no” okay.

N. O.

No. None of this man for Keith.

He was…

“Yeah, you’ve got some really nice legs. Real nice ass too. Crazy distracting. I should lend you my jeans, do us all a favor.” Lance chattered, not even sure he was still saving face or just making life even more hell for himself, “Not exactly how I expected to let you into my pants, but you know. It works.”

Keith twisted the rest of the way, his leg pulling out of Lance’s grasp for a minute before Lance found it again, though now Keith had managed to scoot a bit closer, his legs bent above Lance’s lap. A few inches further down and he’d practically be sitting on him.

This kind of would have meant his heart stopping, but Lance vaguely wished he could have scooted down anyway.

His eyes were wide and confused but hopeful and wow Lance felt kind of shitty right now. He wanted nothing more than to lean forward and kiss him. Push him back into the seat of the couch and press his fingertips all over his body and mark up his pretty pale skin.

But no.

Lance was a consolation prize for him.

And he wasn’t going to let that…

Ah fuck.

“You think I’m hot right?” Lance started finally, dangerously moving his hand up and down Keith’s thigh making him breathe a little raggedly.

Keith made a noise akin to a mewl and Lance felt himself start to rise to attention. Definitely needed to work on his willpower. But this was to be expected.

“Y-yeah, Lance I—”

“So, like, relatively hot or was there some interest back…before?” Lance pressed on. Though he knew the answer. Keith didn’t even remember Lance before they saved Shiro together.

Lance didn’t realize his grip on Keith’s thigh had tightened or that Keith was pressing his knees together hard.

“L-Lance can we uhm—can you—”

“Answer the question Keith.”

What if Keith did find him attractive, just on the general scale? What if he was into him sexually and all that good fun stuff even way back at the garrison? He had remembered him enough to remember he used to be a cargo pilot. So, it could easily have been something like—like the hot barista Lance had seen at the Starbucks next to his house a few times. Didn’t really remember her but would not have said no if she’d ever asked him out.

Would that make the difference?

Could Lance say yes then?

…

No. Nah. Nuh-uh.

Because that’s just a physical connection and Lance has had physical connections and he was tired of them. He wanted Keith because—

Oh fu-frickel frack quiznak that, Lance did not want Keith.

Not Keith, not really, not in any way other than purely physical because man did Lance want to get his head crushed between these thighs. He almost groaned out loud just thinking about it.

If he went home with “I got to freak Keith Kogane” bragging rights it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Lance got what he wanted. Keith got what he wanted. And Lance got a major ego boost out of it too.

He could totally say yes.

He could totally embark on a physical only relationship with Keith freaking Kogane.

Why was he questioning this?

He should just launch down his throat now, strip his clothes off, slam him into the couch.

Yeah. Totally sensible. No feelings involved.

Lance felt his chest tighten.

Because it was way too late for that and he absolutely knew better. There were galaxies of feelings involved around Lance’s opinion of and desire for Keith and there wasn’t a black hole big enough to swallow it all up to let Lance enjoy casual sex with him.

Oh man did his body want to though.

What was he doing with his life?

“Lance?”

Lance turned his head just slightly to find Keith’s face only a few inches from his, poor bruised lip free and shiny and just so so fucking kissable.

Lance shook his head and pulled his neck back just a bit, slipping his hand between Keith’s thighs as they continued to rub up and down his legs. Keith’s breath hitched but he didn’t tell him to stop or pull away in the slightest.

“Sorry, I don’t think I heard you,” Lance mumbled finally.

Keith swallowed again, eyes darting down to look at Lance’s hands and then back up to his face and then down to his mouth where they seemed to stay.

Lance probably would have felt flustered and or found it endearing if he wasn’t suffering so much right then.

“…Lance I need you to know that when I say this I mean this okay?”

“Okay.”

“Like really. I’m completely sincere about this.”

“Okay Mullet.”

“I mean I thought I’ve been pretty clear about this, but you know, I guess—”

“Keith.”

The previously babbling boy took a deep breath before staring directly into Lance’s eyes, that deep violet mesmerizing and determined.

“I have…always—”

The castle alarms went off signaling a Galra attack. It drowned out the rest of Keith’s statement as his eyes widened and he practically climbed over Lance to bolt out the door. Normally, Lance would share in his priorities when it came to their intergalactic space war but honestly?

Honestly?!

---

The fight wasn’t difficult or taxing, but it was long and with the black lion still firmly not giving in to Shiro, Keith had been calling the very tense, very second-guessed shots on everything.

Lance tried his best to be the same reassuring right hand he was expected to be, but perhaps the conversation they’d been having just before hadn’t exactly been the best idea.

Hell, they were in the middle of a war. Why were they even worrying about shit like this?

Because you’re a teenage boy. You’re a teenage boy stuck out in space with the biggest temptation to ever storm across the school hallways.

“Keep your weird tension out of the mind link, okay?” Pidge whined on their way out of the hangar. Keith was way ahead, raking his fingers through his hair, the back of his neck looking a little pink.

“Yeah Lance. It was kinda. Stifling. Maybe try to reign it back a bit?” Hunk mumbled, eyeing Lance like he wasn’t saying all he wanted to.

Allura hadn’t said much and had rolled her eyes playfully before practically dancing past the ex-garrison students to wrap an arm around Keith’s shoulders.

“I’m sure whatever is worrying you will turn out alright Keith.” She smiled at him.

It was… unnerving to have all their feelings out between the lions like that but at least they didn’t really know… everything, right?

“I do suggest trying to be a bit more direct though.” Allura continued “I mean, given what I know of you and how you handle your problems it’s unlike you to be so… cautious. And I’d think perhaps that’s actually the problem in this case.”

She said it in a way that sounded well meaning but Keith couldn’t help feeling the sting.

Yes, he knew he was reckless. Yes, as Voltron’s leader that was a giant freaking problem. He’s been trying to fix that, with Lance’s help. So sue him if he didn’t want to undo all his work on himself by just pounding on the guy—

Allura shrugged and smiled at him, “I mean, it doesn’t feel like any part of that was about the war… the sooner you open up the sooner you can move past it.”

Keith glances back to try and look at Lance, see how he was fairing, but it seemed he’d stayed back with Hunk and Pidge somewhere.

“...right.”

—

Lance had ended up receiving a pretty similar conversation from Hunk, seconded by Pidge who truly didn’t want to be bothered any longer.

That’s what led to him sitting alone in his room staring at his communicator and trying to think of what to say to the contact labeled “mullet.”

He scribbled an awkward draft about how he felt, how he’d considered Keith was only going to use him, how he’d thought he could perhaps do the same thing but then there were all those pesky feelings he’d had for years making that kind of thing difficult.

He erased it all.

He tried again, talking about the sparring incident, how happy he was that it made Keith happy but that he had wanted to stay there with him. How badly he’d wanted to kiss him because that kind of proximity made it hard to ignore those kinds of feelings—

Erased.

You wanna just bone and get it over with?

Erased— flip his finger slipped.

No wait.

Fuck.

FUCK.

Ohhh Jesus Mary and Joseph no no no delete delete delete—

Fucking fuck shit fuckety fuckens the third what was he going to do—

THAT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO SEND OH MY GOD.

Should he send that? Would that make anything better? Oh god oh god oh god--

Keith had read the message.

He was typing-- holy nope.

Lance threw his communicator across the room in a panic. He was dead; he was dead and he was in hell and he was living out his worst nightmare, of course. That was the only explanation.

He grabbed his blankets, tossed it over himself and tried to brainwash himself into forgetting Keith ever existed.

—

Lance had managed to avoid Keith for exactly two days. They were high stress and he was surprisingly (well, not really) out of his mind with misery.

He tried asking Pidge to fix his communicator but then remembered she would be able to read his messages and decided against it.

It was over lunch on the third day that Keith was already sitting at the table when Lance had walked in with Hunk, making it impossible to backtrack. However, Keith flushed and excused himself instead.

Which. Okay. Lance was avoiding him, but that didn’t mean Keith should avoid him too, right??

It kinda hurt his feelings.

Not that Lance wanted to admit that. Didn’t he start this? Or did Keith— gah!

Lance was losing it. Losing it. Honestly he just wanted to—

Kiss him.

Just once. Get it out of his system okay? Just the one time and be done with it and never deal with his feelings for Keith Kogane ever again.

He ate his food quickly and excused himself from Hunk time (they were supposed to meet Pidge for a movie but Lance was sure they’d get over it) and left the kitchen.

Only to immediately walk into Keith who looked like he was on his way back into the kitchen, looking determined and adorable with his lip between his teeth again—

God he did that a lot didn’t he…

“Lance!”

“Mullet.” It slipped out. Lance politely flicked his own forehead in a show of repentance, “frick. Sorry. Keith. Hi.”

“H-hi…” Keith took a step back, eyes on the ground, “Lance I uh. I think we should talk— I mean. I don’t know what you want or anything but I—“

Lance watched him fumble. Watched his fingers twitch and watched the blush carry from his cheeks up to his ears and down his chest. Watched his eyes flicker and the way his lips couldn’t quite find the words.

Keith was…so gosh darned adorable.

“Quiznak.” And so, given what he’d already wanted to do and how little restraint he then had, he took Keith by the cheeks and pulled him in for an awkward, slightly wet, and extremely uncomfortable kiss.

Still. It was done. Lance couldn’t complain, he’d done what he wanted, what he needed—

Keith’s eyes went wide as they parted, his body frozen. Lance released a small sigh, “there, okay? We’re cool—“

Keith grabbed him by the neck, pulled him in and brought them back together again. He massaged Lance’s lips with his own, quickly darting his tongue against them, asking them to part just enough—

Just let him in.

It felt like too long but Lance finally relented, granting Keith’s tongue that access for just a moment as his hands went to Keith’s lower back to hold him close. Despite the fervor that had started it Keith moved slowly into the kiss as if trying to savor every second of it. Unfortunately, it only lasted about three seconds, as they both heard the kitchen door slide open. They jumped apart as if electrocuted and Hunk didn’t seem to notice.

“Oh hey Keith! You wanna watch a movie?”

—-

Keith had sent Lance about a billion messages but the other Paladin seemed determined not to respond. If that was how he was going to play then fine.

Keith wasn’t a child. Keith wasn’t going to play this game where Lance got to play pretend and run away from his problems. Silent treatment, avoidance, it was infantile and Keith might have been reckless but he was a friggin adult, hell, he was supposed to be leading this ridiculous war—even if he did spend most of his time trying to get Black to go back to Shiro— and he deserved more respect from his right hand man then a quick kiss in a hallway and nothing, okay?!

Though. Maybe. Sneaking into Lance’s room in the middle of the night probably wasn’t the BEST idea.

Or maybe it was.

Whatever, he was doing it.

No one could stop him.

Kamikaze Keith time, lets do it.

—-

He was exhausted, but Lance went through his nightly routine as usual and made himself ready for bed just how he always did.

He was sure he’d pass out the second his head hit the pillow and given how his mind had run a mile a minute since that stupid decision he’d made earlier in the day he was desperately waiting for it. Sadly, it didn’t happen.

So he just laid there. And his mind continued to run. And run, and run and run…

Naturally, it ran around thoughts of Keith. Thoughts of his face, of that smile, of his legs and the way he’d straddled him during their sparring session-- which felt like far too long ago now.

He thought of that kiss. Not the first one which was so incredibly lackluster and honestly a full failure on his part-- but of the second, where Keith had pushed against him, where Keith had taken the reins and made clear demands of him and he’d just wanted…

But it had been so short. And Lance couldn’t find the nerve to get him alone again. Wasn’t sure how to approach him… Wasn’t sure if he really wanted to go down that road now.

Really, should he be so selfish? They’d already stressed the others out with their mixed up feelings when they’d formed Voltron… Maybe the best thing was to just. Let it go.

He should talk to Keith in the morning, tell him they couldn’t do this. At least- not now during a war. What if they just complicated their relationship more and made it all so much worse…

Of course, there was the chance they could work together even better right? Be perfectly in sync. Really, they kind of were already presuming Lance wasn’t in a bad mood and Keth wasn’t off playing lone samurai--

...Which, arguably, shouldn’t happen if they were more… involved with each other, wouldn’t it?

Good god, there goes his brain again. Just running and running and running.

He just wanted to hold him.

He groaned and tossed himself over in bed, pulling his pillow out from under his head to squeeze against his chest while he laid on his side.

He just wanted Keith.

He wanted Keith, he wanted Keith, he wanted Keith.

This was the thought he seemed to finally allow himself to sleep on. Quietly dreaming of holding Keith in his arms as the night went on.

He dreamt of running his fingers through Keith’s hair, of kissing his jaw and listening to him as he released tiny contented noises. Dreamt of Keith’s hands idly moving up and down his side and back, his eyes narrowing in that way that incited Lance to rise to any challenge.

Dreamt of Keith pushing him onto his back, of his fingers trailing down his chest as Keith’s thighs landed on either side of Lance’s waist. Reveled in the feeling of Keith pressing against him, of his small coy smile as he started to lose himself to the rutting of his hips.

He murmured his name and his chest tightened at the way the word sounded on Keith’s lips.

Such pretty lips…

Lance felt the friction start to awaken something in him. The hunger he’d felt after running into that storage room to pretend he didn’t. But here he was, beneath Keith in the darkness and privacy of his own bedroom—

In his dreams of course.

… right?

“Tell me you want this too, Lance…”

Keith’s eyes almost seemed to glow as they implored him. Lance was sure it was a dream. There was no way Keith could look that gorgeous sneaking into his room like this…

But Keith’s eyes have always sort of been able to capture the light in the most insanely magical ways… and he felt so real.

Lance reached up to grip Keith’s hips, slowly apply more pressure and bring them down a little harder over his straining pants.

“Lance…” he breathed, but didn't argue.

Lance stared at the places their bodies wanted so clearly to connect and for a moment he wasn’t sure he could feel his legs.

“Am I… am I dreaming…?”

Keith rolled his hips wider, with less rush and more feeling, before leaning forward close enough Lance could feel his breath on his cheek but not far enough to lay on him completely.

“Do you want to be?”

Lance released a long breath and his chest buzzed with the faint release of tension. It would build up again in a moment he’s sure. But…

“Do you dream about me often, Lance?” Keith’s eyes were narrowed and his fingers were tapping along Lance’s chest, slipping down to the hem of his shirt and sliding up inside against his skin.

Lance jolted at the sudden sensation but noted that Keith’s fingers were warm. Of course they were. Keith always burned hot…

Keith’s jaw dropped for a moment and Lance realized that his sudden movement had caused him to jut his hips in a way Keith probably hadn’t been prepared for. Initially, Lance was concerned. Wondered if he should apologize.

But then Keith released a tiny shudder and said again, “do you dream of this…?”

Another slow breath. This one more deliberate.

Right. Because this is all foreplay. Got it.

“Man oh man, Keithy boy… let me show you what I dream about.” This time the jut of his hips was purposeful and he held Keith in place so he simply had to sit there and feel the brunt of it.

Keith made another small noise, he desperately tried to move but Lance’s hands were steady.

“Lance…”

“If I let go, are you going to get undressed for me?”

Keith tried again to sway, to feel Lance’s bulge exactly where he wanted it, but to no avail.

He nodded.

Lance raised his chin and smiled at the boy who’d snuck into his room like this.

“Good…but first.” He lifted one hand to Keith’s back and pressed down, forcing Keith against his chest fully. Once he was down Lance’s other hand found Keith’s cheek and guided him up to Lance’s lips.

With the way Keith melted into him Lance almost thought it was Keith’s idea for Lance to hold him this tightly, to press their lips together and slowly allow each other entry. He felt Keith’s tongue eager to taste every inch of him just like outside the kitchen only here there’s no chance of being caught, no chance that someone might step in and pull them apart—

And Lance lived for Keith’s excitement. Lived for the way a tiny mewl escaped Keith’s throat and how he could feel Keith’s hands working between them as he pulled down his leggings and rubbed against his shaft through his pajama bottoms.

It caused Lance to gasp into the kiss and Keith took this as encouragement. He moved faster, pressed down harder, kissed Lance deeper. He had to breathe but he didn't want to pull away. Wanted to stay just like this with Keith almost frantic but equal parts completely… his?

Keith’s hands undid his pajamas and one hand was directly on his skin. When Keith’s thumb slid over Lance’s head, slipping into the beads of precum at his slit Lance had to jolt again. The kiss broke with Lance’s shuddered moan and quick breaths.

“More.” Keith mumbled, so low Lance almost missed it.

Turned out it was just a moment of auditory delay because before Keith could repeat himself Lance had him flipped onto his back.

“Oh don’t worry. I’ll give you more.”

Keith’s legs were spread open beneath him and his hair fanned out against Lance’s mattress. He was naked from the waste down and his lips were wet and his face might have been flushed in the dim light but Lance was positive.

The guy has never looked more perfect.

He was kissing him again before he could even register his dick half in and half out of his pants.

—

Keith thought Lance looked like a damn mess right then.

His bed head had his hair standing up in all these weird angles, his pajama top was partially unbuttoned and barely clinging to his shoulders, his pants were half way down his ass and his dick’s head was poking out of the front of the waistband gleaming at him as if to say hello—

And Keith was so for it he couldn’t even wrap his head around the ridiculous bubbling in his chest. Lance’s hair was perfect, Lance’s disheveled shirt showed off his chest and shoulder perfectly, his pants—

Well hello in-friggin-deed.

Keith had his hands on him, he knew the size of him now and god did that knowledge kind of wreck him.

And here he was laying half naked underneath him as if he was worth it.

As if he was allowed to lay there and ask Lance to have him.

And yet his legs still parted and he still tilted his head to make his lips more inviting. He wanted Lance and for some reason, despite all of Lance’s backwards attitude and questionable behavior he wanted him too.

He felt stupid sneaking into his room. Felt awkward as hell standing over his bed debating about waking him up or leaving. Felt like a complete moron when he thought he heard Lance mumble his name and told himself: “that’s it, I’m doing it.”

Besides, Lance had technically invited him after all. Right? With that message?

Keith felt stupid but he wasn’t going to let it show. Wasn’t going to give Lance any kind of proof that he wasn’t all in.

Because he was all in. Because he’d wanted Lance so damn long of course he was.

His doubts about himself be damned, if Lance wanted to indulge him tonight then he was going to enjoy every moment. Every touch. Every desperate ache in every empty part of him that he wanted Lance to fill. He wanted Lance to envelop him, consume him, sit inside his chest and stay with him until this war was over, until the lions were distant memories, until their scars were faded and their lives were just so damn full of each other--

Keith croaked, an involuntary motion to stop whatever the hell his head was doing to him and just take in Lance’s disheveled beautiful face again.

Except now Lance’s disheveled beautiful face was looking at him with an odd smile on his lips.

“You good?”

“Yea--y-yeah. Your hair just looks ridiculous like this.” Keith tried, unconvincing.

“Oh does it? You’re talking about my hair, mullet?” Lance’s smile widened and his eyes narrowed as his hand wandered into Keith’s black tresses.

Keith, always easily baited, scrunched up his brows; “Oh my god it’s not a mullet it’s just long!”

“Yeah, guess it is.” Lance’s fingers lightly scraped at Keith’s scalp as he took hold of a large chunk of his hair and pulled. The moan that slipped out of Keith then was particularly embarrassing but he couldn’t focus on it very much when Lance dipped his head down to bite into his neck.

“Well, me and this bedhead of mine are going to ravage you now so maybeeee you won’t be looking so hot by the end of this either.” Lance offered finally with a languid press of his tongue over Keith’s abused skin. Keith was too out of breath to answer but Lance doesn’t seem to mind, he yanks on Keith’s hair again and his other hand slips between Keith’s legs. The red paladin squirmed beneath him, panting and mewling as that hand rubbed along his perineum and up his shaft to press down against his slit.

“Hmm… I guess that’s kind of unlikely.” Lance started again, a breathy whisper in his ear, “You’re always hot. But I can at least make you a little messy, right kitten?”

---

When Keith woke up the next morning it was to the reek of sex and something unpleasant and hard in his hair. Upon further inspection he had multiple spots all over his body that had crusted white, which wasn’t even touching on the fact he was covered in deep red and purple bruises and bite marks.

He was, in fact, a disgusting mess. Lance had clearly delivered.

He was laying on his side next to him, one arm draped over Keith’s waist. His hair was still standing up in all manner of ridiculous directions but there was a soft smile on his sleeping face just before he unconsciously tightened his hold and pulled Keith closer to him, his nose bumping Keith’s cheek but once more he didn’t seem bothered.

Keith considered the foul state of things again before sighing deeply and rolling over so he could tangle himself with that boy he was so insanely in love with.

And then, of course, in nightmarish fashion that Keith had been getting quite accustomed to, he somehow--stupidly--with his lips so close to Lance’s ears it was impossible Lance couldn’t hear-- he let the words slip out of his mouth.

“God, I love you.”

“...huh?”

“Fuck.”

#There was a glitch with my unemployment so I am out a lot of money and just want to feel productive for a bit.#this means checking things off my list and closing tabs I've had open forever so...#so be it #klance #nsfw #should I even bother tagging this #No one's gonna read it anyway #Pining Keith #he's a mess #please save him #Lance is also a mess but for different reasons #what are feelings #what was that ending #sequel?#Lol no there are too many drafts just accept it #I had to go back and re format this gdi wtf #in which there is lots of foreplay again

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