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now this... this is a post on tumblr dot com

people today with access to more raw information than any other period: the earth is flat

german artilleryman in 1916, who barely washes his own ass: I need to account for the curvature and rotation of the earth when plotting my firing plans

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LOOK AT THESE THINGS, THEY ARE ADORABLE, YOU NEED ONE

Hey folks! On my sister’s insistence I have set up an Etsy. At the moment the only thing I have on there is my octokittens, but more crafts will appear! Check it out here if you’re interested.

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!!! I’m glad you like it! it was really fun to come up with!! :D

Hi!! I’ve just spent way too long writing down a probably excessive amount of worldbuilding for Jevin’s species in @martuzzio‘s hermit space outlaws AU!!! Disclaimer: I pulled everything scientific-sounding in this post straight out of my ass. Also I’m pretty sure I contradict things that have been established as canon at at least a couple points. martuzzio, please feel free to take this or leave it, or only take part of it, whatever you like. I just got hit by worldbuilding inspiration! And I had to get it out!!

Keep reading

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MAG 129

A small tribute to this episode of The Magnus Archives I liked a lot !

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yeah but none of the crab shaped animals around here have evolved to become significantly intelligent, let alone sapient.* crabs have a body plan that’s good for surviving in harsh and variable circumstances. humans have a body plan that’s good for absolutely nothing besides being very intelligent and social tool users.

so to be realistic, your aliens should have something equivalent to the godawful design of the human spine and lower back, and they should look like total wimps compared to basically everything else on their planet!

*unless you count octopi as crab-shaped. soft crabs.

The thing with humanoid aliens is that organisms with human form have only evolved once in all the half-billion years of multicellular life on Earth, and then under some very specific circumstances.

If you want something realistic, make your aliens look like crabs. Animals evolve into crab shapes so often that biologists had to invent a word for it.

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countersuggestion: Crowley did not invent tumblr. that was all humans. he did, however, suggest to Yahoo that it would be a great investment which would help them finally break into the social media business.

and he is absolutely responsible for Yahoo Answers.

People on this site: How is it that 90% of my dash is filled with that gay angel and demon couple?

Anthony J. Crowley, who won three awards in Hell when he created Tumblr dot com:

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Punk dad got his badass kids back 

Do NOT tag as a ship

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happy 10th anniversary!!

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Slime mold was grown on an agar gel plate shaped like America and food sources were placed where America’s large cities are. 

The result? A possible look at how to best build public transportation. 

I just really like the idea of slime mold on a map of the US. It’s beautiful.

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I made this because I have no self control. Enjoy!

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also ive been thinking about the house juju. when john took it, it gave him the power to retroactively change canon and therefore save his friends from the game over timeline. this was the only way to win the game. this we already know, and is canon.

it’s implied that john is finding earth c (post-canon) existence unfulfilling and his relationships are suffering because of that. john is the glue that ties the characters together (you’re our friend and this is why you must be our leader). if john is “stuck” in canon aka still relevant to the story, he cannot be meaningfully present with the life he’s built afterwards. with that lack of presence, the rest of the crew starts to crumble psychologically too.

anyways i think john sticking his hand in the juju is why earth c faces the threat of becoming non canon. perhaps as long as there is a way to influence canon in the post game, the story can never be fulfilled and complete.

as long as john (and subsequently, the juju’s power) is in earth c, they will never have their happy ending. that’s why rose’s goodbye felt so final.

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Some say Homestuck will end in meat,

Some say in candy. 

From what I’ve seen the fans entreat,

I hold with those who favor meat. 

But knowing Huss’s modus operandi, 

I think I’ve read enough updates 

To say that for conclusions candy 

Is also great 

And would be dandy.

- Robert Frost

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homestuck on main is legal now

anyways here’s my predictions for the epilogue

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The Meat/Candy Binary-Homestuck Book Commentary Submission

OP: Hey, I thought I’d share this commentary I saw in book 3 about [S] Jack: Ascend, because I thought you’d probably find it as interesting as I do (also it’s too big for an ask so I have to do it as a submission sorry):

Hussie quote: “[…] I think this one marks the start of Homestuck’s trend thereafter of dropping exceptionally violent, high-octane, game-changing animations out of nowhere. There are so many like this from on, right up to the end of Act 5. Only then does the number sort of taper off. But from this point on I just sorta started shoveling more and more red meat into the story’s maw. This stretch is where I was starting to get a feel for this type of sensationalistic storytelling content as something I’d later code (mostly for my own internal purposes) as “meat,” in the meat/candy binary of storycraft theory. I really shouldn’t talk about this yet, though. It’s too soon.”

This quote threw me for a loop, to be honest, and I’ve been mulling it over the last couple days. I wasn’t sure what the Meat/Candy binary was referring to at all, I was just kind of like uhh wtf?

Then I remembered this exchange, and I think things started coming together:

Meat and Candy are all Caliborn/Calliope eat. Which makes sense, since they’re the ultimate audience stand ins.  Hussie gives us a good sense of what Meat means in his description: Very violent, very game-changing animations that move the story forward. Parts where people die and/or Get Shit done, usually delivered with a lot of visual spectacle.

Caliborn gives us a pretty hefty clue as to the second. Odds seem good “Candy” refers to shipping, or at least the very particular kind of shipping Caliborn is interested in.

Which is to say, Caliborn isn’t interested in watching Roxy and Jane have a real relationship, or grow as people, or wrestle with real feelings. He’s interested in the physical titillation they can provide him with by acting out the cute parts of a relationship. See also: Trickster Mode, where the characters indulge candy and become saccharine sweet and affectionate to each other while being entirely detached from their conflicts and issues.

Unsurprisingly, Caliborn’s also only interested in “candy” that caters specifically to his own sexuality, insofar as he consciously performs it.

So basically, Meat and Candy both provide different forms of titillation and satisfying “content”, from the fandom’s perspective. Meat gives us raw plot, the satisfaction of Things Happening, steaks being raised, etc. Candy gives us shipping fodder, absent conflict and growth that real relationships require.

This log also introduces a third concept into the equation, presenting an alternative to the Meat/Candy binary: Pumpkins, or Vegetables.

The implications of this one seem fairly obvious to me. Vegetables may not be tasty or satisfying to eat, but they’re good for you and necessary to a healthy body. Eating one’s vegetables is considered a sign of maturity, or at least being on the path to maturity.

I’m going to guess that in this framework, vegetables refers to content depicting the characters actually reckoning with themselves, facing their feelings and flaws, and growing as people, friends, and relationship partners. This is explicitly built into Dirk and Jake’s relationship symbolically, but really it applies to every endgame ship and to the character’s arcs more generally. Caliborn doesn’t give a shit about anything that has to do with the characters actually growing up.

Pumpkins are also Void items, which makes me wonder. If the most “important” romantic relationships for each character, the ones that help them grow as people, are the ones considered “Pumpkin” matter in the story, maybe that goes some way to explaining why we get so little explicitly romantic affection shown between, say, Vrisrezi, Davekat, and Dirkjake. That’s candy.

If that last idea is accurate to the story’s internal logic, it makes me think of this quote from The Little Prince:

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.

Anyway if I’m right about this at all, the real takeaway is that @sam-keeper​ was writing about this aspect of Homestuck openly way back in 2016. So, you know. Homestuck was good and meaningfully constructed all along, and everyone should listen to Sam forever. What else is new.

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Hey friends and enemies it’s Homestuck day so let me tell you about fucking Homestuck.

A long time ago Homestuck was big and everyone who loved it liked to joke that it was bad, because it was kinda, in that it was a weird style and an absurd story and a shambling tangle of non-linear meta-jokes and cultural references only thirty year old coders would get. People still loved it, because that wasn’t all it was (we’ll get to that), but over time Stuff happened, and the momentum of the story slowed while expectations mounted and the resulting dissonance left the ending feeling a little flat. And sometime in the intervening years between then and now, the ironic “Homestuck is bad” apparently stopped being ironic and became sincere.

Which was a little confusing and a little annoying, because I never got the memo and it took me a long time to cotton on to the fact that Homestuck was considered ‘cringey’ even in circles that it literally built. Anyways, the conventional wisdom does seem to be Homestuck Is Bad now, and the wise thing to do is probably apologetically disavow or at very least cautiously enumerate Homestuck’s various flaws so I can reassure both you and myself that I’ve paid the proper penance for whatever nugget of sincere affection I may have harbored under my ironic platitudes in those bygone years of the mid 2010′s. 

Thankfully I’m a dumb fucking bitch, so instead here’s why I love Homestuck.

Keep reading

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Mistaken For Strangers- The National

Companion to this piece from three years ago

Sorry this couldn’t be done as an audio post, tumblr said lyricstucks have no rights.