kevinthevelociraptor

[kevinthevelociraptor]

It's been about three years since I first tried applying for disability and I just got the letter from the most recent appeal... denied again, and this time with the added bonus of transphobia and ableism at the forefront. I honestly don't know how much more of this I can take. My roommate has sent information to see if there might be a discrimination case here but how much more violence must I endure before I will be deemed 'worthy' of help? How much humiliation and inhumanity before I become a person in the eyes of my government? How many times must I grovel so I might be permitted to exist? I can't keep going as the money from being a victim of crime slowly diminishes. My will to live is basically nonexistent and I seem to be living waiting for my heart give out on me. I've contemplated 100 different ways to die just to lessen the pain I feel. When is it enough? Is my life really worth less then that of an able bodied person? Should I keep trying for a maybe? And hold out for the slim possibility that things might get better? Or do I start to get my affairs in order now and enjoy a small bit of life before making my own exit? I'm leaning more and more towards the exit as the days go by, just wanting to have a last bit of joy since it seems my life is worthless to those in change anyway.

[kevinthevelociraptor]

You ever learn you have curly hair at the quarter century mark? That after 2 and a half decades your hair is not in fact straight that's maybe a little wavy... cause now I get the special hell of figuring out how to care for curly hair

[kevinthevelociraptor]

I don't know if anyone will ever read this, and honestly I don't know if I care or not. But this is goodbye, for those who knew me this won't come as a surprise. For everyone else know I love life, I fought everyday because I wanted nothing more then to live. I guess I'll find out if the pain will end

[kevinthevelociraptor]

Is it just me or are there very queer vibes about black nails? Like any time I paint my nails black I feel extremely gay

[kevinthevelociraptor]

[kevinthevelociraptor]

Anxious? Depressed? You might be suffering from capitalism

[kevinthevelociraptor]

from @terms_of_engagement on Instagram

The link and the petition at the bottom of the first page were made by us. It’s time to move forward. DM @floridian-cryptid if you’d like to compose an email.

[kevinthevelociraptor]

So the last few months have been difficult, and its only gotten worse

You'd think my biggest concern would be the pandemic that could easily kill me or my partner who are both chronically ill but no it's not. I'm more worried about how close we are to homelessness, or dealing with my ex who keeps finding new and creative ways to fuck us over. I'm more worried about my mental health and how close I've gotten to trying to commit suicide. At this point I have little to no hope of things getting better. I've called all the agencies asking for assistance and gotten nowhere. I've tried pushing on AISH so we can afford even a shitty one bedroom apartment and been denied again. I've tried convincing the landlord to lower rent for a single month and been told they'd lower it by $50 at the most which is nowhere near enough. I honestly don't know what there is I can do at this point and I'm so goddamn tired.

The social programs that are supposed to help have said there's nothing they can do, I don't qualify for any government help. AISH has told me I haven't tried hard enough to get a job, Social Services has told me they're giving me all they can, and I can't even try applying for subsidized housing. Add in my ex and how she's continually fucked with me and it's hard to keep trying.

Usually when I'm backed into a corner I try tapping into anger because at least then I'm trying to move forward. But the anger isn't there, all I have is exhaustion. At this point I hope that if this kills me my death won't be in vain. I had to ask of my cousin one of the worst things and that was that if I die to not let my story go quietly into obscurity. I don't want someone else following me to the grave because the system didn't get them help in time.

Only let my story die when the system no longer kills with it's apathy.

[kevinthevelociraptor]

I ate pickle out of a pond when I was 7

When I was a kid I lived in a small town near a pond with a walking path that lead past it that was near some houses as well and it was the path I took to school. One of these house seemed to be abandoned and had a porcelain sheep outside of it. This sheep was really fucking creepy, it’s painted face was halfway down its neck.

Being 7 and walking to school with a girl in my class (Harper) and her older sister (Payton) we started calling it the demon sheep. One day while it was raining my 7 year old brain decided to sacrifice the local worm population to demon sheep and I dropped approximately 40 worms on the sheep that I found on my way to school. After school all the worms were gone, and the following day the demon sheep had moved a step down and every day it moved closer to the pond.

One day when it was raining I forgot to give it worms and then the following day it turned its back on the pathway and the river that cut through the town started to flood and flooded the streets and the basement of my house. I gave it worms the following day and the river stopped flooding.

Another time I learned about salt doing things to demons and I dumped salt on the demon sheep. Again it turned around and there was a tornado warning for 3 days and there was a black burn ring in the grass that followed it even though I continued to give it worms and snails.

Once it reached the pond it faced the pond and the next day Harper, Payton and I went over to this pond and looked at it and then at the pond. A pickle popped out of the pond and Harper got in my face and said “you have to eat the pickle, demon sheep summoned it” and that was all it took to get me to eat this pick out of a pond. After doing so it went back to the step.

Also I surrounded it severed Barbie heads that disappeared one by one as they moved with it towards the pond. I also got in a lot of shit for throwing worms at it when it ended up on the roof of the abandoned house

I told my boyfriend this story last night after we fucked

[kevinthevelociraptor]

My partner asked me to look up 'which ear is gay?' And we came across this gem of an article, please if there is one thing you do today read about this accidentally gay kid

[kevinthevelociraptor]

As a bit of context, I'm currently house sitting my mom's place, it's only been two days and I already miss my partners... I'm supposed to be house sitting for a month. Also she lives in a small town so I can't exactly go to my partners and they can't just come here. Ugh I just kinda want cuddles. 😑😓

That mood where you go sleep nah don't know her

[kevinthevelociraptor]

That mood where you go sleep nah don't know her

[kevinthevelociraptor]

Pure unfiltered rage with a side of spite

explain your gender in 10 words or less without using boring words like “male”, “female”, “nonbinary”, “masculine”, “feminine” or “androgynous”.

go!

[kevinthevelociraptor]

I’m so done with Jason Kenny’s bullshit that I modified my favourite jacket to wear to pride this September here in Calgary Alberta, because I want people to know I’m pissed and not taking anyone’s shit anymore

Fuck that man, fuck his homophobic anti privacy law he is inflict on the youth of our community, fuck his wage discrimination against youth, fuck the garbage he’s done to our unions, fuck that time he handed out goddamn earplugs to his party during a fucking debate, fuck the cuts to Alberta’s education system and fuck everyone that voted for him.

I don’t want to stand idly by while this toad of a man destroys my home and hurts the people who live here.

We’ve tried the using he proper channels to fix things and used our “indoor voices” and nothing fucking happened so it’s time to stop being polite and get loud and in their fucking faces

Tagging: @abpoli @allthecanadianpolitics

[kevinthevelociraptor]

I feel vaguely threatened

just remembered last summer when one of our old lady neighbors realized i was on testosterone and asked me if i liked cars and when i said no she was like “oh haha you will”

[kevinthevelociraptor]

Missing my actual hair colour but close and was a lot of fun

@grandpa-bastardman @moonstonehazel17108

started by @the-sugarqueen

- - - The post was too long to reblog ::

Tag 4 People to make themselves:

1.) @nyatiqa

2.) @ad-magnum-ingenium

3.) @thefandom-dump

4.) @ Person reading this

LINK: https://picrew.me/image_maker/9889

[kevinthevelociraptor]

Crunchity munchity