kasiasthoughts - Tumblr blog

[kasiasthoughts]

My artwork in the gallery 🌿

:Climate change and gender inequality

[kasiasthoughts]

[kasiasthoughts]

Today I heard the story about Santino, the chimpanzee at a zoo in May of 2010 that would throw stones at visitors. The question was whether the chimp was consciously making the decision to throw these stones at visitors, and if so, why? or was there a mysterious urge that made him systematically do it?

Was his conscious mind involved, and were his actions related to his own self, his own personal being? or was this a system that evolved in his brain overtime? Was this voluntary behavior or natural?

If the chimp does have a conscious mind and can place feelings and emotions towards non-systematic movements, then I would argue that humans have kept this chimp in a cage and can see them as the "bad guys". He will lose his freedom by being placed in this cage, and his anger and aggression will build up along with his lack of freedom.

Does the lack of freedom women face in this world cause them to see men as a threat, putting up guards whenever one gets near?

I fear that every time a man approaches me who is unfamiliar, I automatically respond in a cold and bitter manner until they prove to be safe. I am turning into an angry and bitter chimp caged in a patriarchal world... is my anger shown through this constant guard I have up.

I wish to be soft and full of open love but the environment I have been forced into is keeping me angry and guarded.

[kasiasthoughts]

It actually baffles me how people are bashing the women on all the reality tv shows for being unnatural. We literally live in a world where women are constantly being bashed for aging or gaining weight and then they wonder why things like Botox, fillers, and ozempic are trending.

Society is putting so much pressure on women to look and be perfect, and then when they spend thousands of dollars to maintain a youthful and thin look, they are still criticized. No matter what women do, it is never enough.

Instead of judging the women who are pandering to the patriarchy, we should be asking ourselves why they feel so pressured to change their natural features in the first place.

The conventional "beauty" ideal is constantly changing in forms of "trends", and only for women.

It is society that is the problem, it is patriarchy that is the problem. women are victims to the patriarchal system and we need to stop bashing them for falling victim to such a toxic system.

[kasiasthoughts]

Is it normal for women to question every single life choice of theirs more than men do? Or are women just more vocal about it?

Or is this just the dynamic I experience between my friends and family?

[kasiasthoughts]

Untitled; acrylic painting on stretched canvas, by me :)

[kasiasthoughts]

its not normal to get used to looking at starving, sick, homeless women and children on our screens everyday

i watched a YouTube documentary film about the crisis in Congo while I was on the treadmill today, then I went grocery shopping, took a shower, cooked lunch and binge watched Sex and the City. The film showed women and children covered in flies, surrounded by trash, unable to get medication or treatment, unable to find food for themselves.

and i just exercised, cooked, ate, and relaxed

how did we let this become our "normal"

[kasiasthoughts]

how do you know if a relationship is right for you

how do you know when to walk away or to stay

relationships are difficult bc each one is different. each one comes with its own problems. but what if the one you're in, doesn't have clear-cut problems. what if it just doesn't feel right. what if it'll never feel right. not just with this one, but with all of them. what if love just doesn't feel right. are people born with a gene allowing them to love and be loved, or do they learn as they get older. if love is foreign to me, will it ever become known. what if i never learn how to love. what if i can not accept the love im given.

[kasiasthoughts]

A painting about womanhood, by me.

[kasiasthoughts]

Choice Feminism;

Feminism is always evolving and right now, I believe we're in a movement of choice feminism where women get the right to chose what type of life they want, no questions asked.

You want to be independent and climb the corporate ladder? Go for it.

You want to be a housewife and tend to your families evry need? Go for it.

Arranged marriage? Love is blind? Online dating? No dating? Single forever? whatever your heart desires.

However, lately I feel as this is a way to silence women. Instead of talking about the ways misogyny is subconsciously being engrained in our everyday lives from birth, we remain silent because technically we can do whatever we want.

But what happens when women who were taught they will be punished if, they don't tend to their husbands needs or don't want to become mothers, are not introduced to ideas outside of religion.

Or women who are forced into arranged marriages because of their culture.

Women are constantly brainwashed or manipulated into thinking a certain way and if "choice feminism" allows women to make their own choices without any further discussion, then that will prevent women from being introduced to new ideas, new perspectives and new ways of life, outside of the ones we are taught to believe from our surroundings and culture.

Is feminism becoming more harmful than helpful?

[kasiasthoughts]

I haven't been feeling too great lately. I go about my day everyday with around the same routine, and I'll feel on top of the world. But sometimes I get a sense of heartpain and a feeling of my throat closing up. I assume it's a form of anxiety and sadness that hits me randomly.

In the world we live in today it's hard not to feel this way. I feel guilty when I'm happy.

I think about the events that are happening in Gaza, Sudan, Ukraine; the homeless in America, the women being silenced in India, the reality of the world is so hard to bare sometimes. I struggle to maintain relationships when the topic of conversation is free donut day, while my brain is scrambling to understand why the world is the way it is.

It's like my heart and my head are screaming and crying and having a full blown melt down inside of me but my body is on pilot mode just carrying on.

[kasiasthoughts]

One of my favorite things about traveling is exploring the way my personality morphs in different situations. I'm constantly changing and surprising myself with attributes I never thought existed within me. There's so many parts of me that are expanding and I've grown in so many different ways. I never want it to end. I want to travel to the most unfamiliar places and see how my body and mind respond.

I return home in 3 weeks, and I made a vow to myself to continue to explore while I'm home. To go see places and meet people, as if I was traveling there for the first time.

The only issue that I've come across is not knowing how to act in familiar situations. It's like I have outgrown who I used to be since going abroad and there's an expectation I have to uphold from my friends and family.

I've always believed that we are made up of our thoughts and experiences, but what if those experiences differ so greatly from one another, that you can't just be made up of one person with one personality. I can't be the only one. Are we all just too much for this world? Have we been taught that we have to dim ourselves? To restrict ourselves to a few labels that make us categorized into specific groups? Can I be it all and still be myself?

[kasiasthoughts]

I love having a job. I love going to work. but I do not like the idea of having one job for the rest of my life.

If I were to chose, I would work a different job every year until I die. Barista one year, social worker the next, then a teacher, then a mechanic, then a tour guide, so on and so forth. How boring is it that our lives are just so focused on one thing in all things.

One job. One house. One partner.

And on top of that, we can only experience life through ourselves. We can never experience life through the lens of another person no matter how hard we try to understand one another.

Life is so much but yet so little at the same time.

[kasiasthoughts]

Navigating relationships in your 20s.

I always judge those girls who place their boyfriends over their girls. But what happens when you don't even have girl friends?? Like what if my boyfriend is the only friend I have.

I also see posts on tiktok that say you have to watch out for the girls that don't have girl friends bc there's a reason for that and then I start to wonder if there is something wrong with me.

Now that I think about it, I'm always questioning if something is wrong with me. When I set a boundary, I think I'm being too mean. When I expect my bf to celebrate my every little accomplishment, I think I'm acting like a brat. When I write blogs about my life, I think I'm just wasting time. When I make art, I think what is the point. This post was not meant to turn into an existential crisis;

but maybe that's what being in your 20s is all about

[kasiasthoughts]

How I look when I’m busy rebloging on tumblr

[kasiasthoughts]

Are the qualities of being feminine evolving?

Some might say that traits like being empathetic, nurturing, emotional, caring, and gentle are feminine; but sometimes I feel like it's evolving into something more powerful. Being feminine is being independent, strong while also fighting for what you believe is right (which could in turn relate to being nurturing and empathetic).

Could our feminine traits evolve; could we be strong and gentle; emotional and independent; could we be it all; is that what being feminine is all about; is that what feminism strives for; could we be it all and could we have it all

[kasiasthoughts]

I listened to a TED talk today on the dangers of western feminism and it got me thinking about the different experiences women go through.

Femininity isn't collective. How we perceive being feminine varies with every individual and their experiences. Some countries base their femininity on being a mother and doing household chores while westernized countries are moving towards a more independent view calling themselves "baddies" after accomplishing things only a man could ever accomplish.

So what really defines being feminine?

Why does wearing cute dresses and skirts, putting bows in my hair, doing Pilates and romanticizing every little thing make me feel more feminine, but acting on my natural biological purpose (birthing babies and embracing motherhood) make me feel "less than"?

Could it be societies expanding views polluting my brain; telling me that in order to be a real woman, I need to be more than just a mother...

Or could it be explained through some childhood trauma phenomenon, like not being comfortable doing feminine things as a child and being ashamed to do certain "girly" things somehow led me to want to do it all now that I'm 27 years old and I finally discovered free will.

Regardless, I'd be curious to see what other women identify as "feminine" and how that differs based on experience.

Could my idea of feminine just be so simplified and basic that I lack the proper experiences to identify my own idea of "feminine"?