kaeya-alberbitch

[kaeya-alberbitch]

— Teaching them how to twerk

(with added visuals!!)

→ Book Genre: Comedy

→ Characters: Kaeya, Venti, Lisa

→ A/N: Was sitting up kekeke-ing over the thought of this while writing. Hope you enjoy this one as much as I did! (also, thanks for the love on my first post & my apologies for my absence 😭😭😭)

——————————————————————————

Now for starters, I honestly don’t think twerking exists in the Genshin world,

Which brings the question; what kind of dances do people do? The hilichurl shuffle? The bard’s bop? The tavern two-step?

So let’s just say you invented twerking for the sake of this story 🤷🏽‍♀️

Kaeya:

i would like to start off by saying that little booties matter 🥺✊🏽

even if u have no booty, which in kaeya’s case he does not.

but hey, who's to say he still cant make it clap? 🤷🏽‍♀️

so you're enjoying a drink at the tavern with kaeya

y'all were a little tipsy when y'all decided to hit up the dance floor (which is quite literally just the middle of the tavern)

y'all were killing it, in the past you've taught Kaeya about hitting the woah, the milly rock, etc.. so y'all were fucking it upppp

(not really, y'all had no rhythm whatsoever, but the drunkards in the tavern hyping you up made y'all think otherwise 😭)

caught up in the hype, you decide to teach Kaeya a new move; twerking

you start by showing him the basic movements, up-down-up-down. simple. right?

wrong.

after teaching kaeya the move, he's determined to give it a try, and you let him. bad decision.

kaeya assumes position; bent over slightly with hands on knees

“Like this?”

you stop dancing to just stare at him in disbelief

“I-”

what the fuck was this man doing?? 😭

its embarrassing asf, but the drunkards in the tavern just assume whatever he's doing is right so they continue to cheer you guys on even more

you decide to continue breaking your back as kaeya quite literally breaks his throughout the night, and wake up the next morning wondering why your backs are sore

Venti:

when venti first saw you twerking, he was curious

“Ooh! I wanna try!”

you teach him and he quickly understood the assignment

he even threw in a little extra ✨pizazz✨

💀💀

and his shit was moving, too!

..maybe even a little more than yours 😳

which made you a bit jealous ngl 💀

you retaliate & start twerking more and it eventually turns into a twerk contest

y'all were breaking yall BACKS

ass was being tossed around in CIRCLES

with no one around to stop y'all two, this goes on for awhile until y'all are forced to quit out of pure exhaustion whilst being drenched in sweat

you're pretty sure you pulled something while twerking, but that was the least of your worries

venti claims he won because “his ass was definitely moving more”

you let him have at it

but best believe there's gonna be a rematch

Lisa:

broooo

Lisa as we all know already thick asl

this'll be easy for her 😩

“I've never done anything like this before~" she claims

you've already showed her the basics of twerking, now it was her turn to give it a go

so you stand by to watch and critique her form

she then assumes position, hands on knees, butt poking out with knees slightly bent;

“gawd dayum” 👴🏾

she starts TOSSING THAT SHIT IN CIRCLES, SQUARES, TRIANGLES AND EVERY OTHER SHAPE

cheeks are moving like they have a mind of their own 😩

she moves it so effortlessly, you start to wonder if she lied when she said that shes ‘never done anything like this’ before

like she was literally making her shit clap atp

you're lowkey tempted to go behind her and start catching all that shit shes throwing 😩😫

shes so humble about it too-

“Did I do it right, y/n?” ☺️

you're literally at loss for words

its like- you expected it but didnt expect it at the same time

she definitely understood the ass-ignment 🥴

[kaeya-alberbitch]

— Their reaction to you slapping their ass

→ Book Genre: Idk

→ Characters: Kaeya, Venti, Diluc, Razor

→ A/N: First post! Hope you like it!

——————————————————————————

Kaeya:

have fun trying to find it because this man literally has ZERO ASS

mf got buckwheat pancakes 🗿

anyway if u do find it and manage to slap it he would probably be amused

would 110% do it back with no shame

if your his s/o, the ass slapping would probably escalate into something else 👀👀

Venti:

loves that shit

doesn’t care who’s watching he loves it

would probably giggle while doing it back

like a lil “Hehe!” then reach around for your ass

it’s just a never ending cycle of ass slaps

someone will have to break y’all two up

Diluc:

damn, u must be real bold

cause this man takes no shit

so you go for the slap and run

he’ll never suspect a thing 😈

deadass would probably turn around and look at u like this

as he sighs and facepalms

deep down he’s slightly embarrassed but pretends like nothing’s happened

“why…”

Razor:

🤨

man leave this poor wolf boy alone

poor boy doesn't understand

”why did you hit my butt? 🙁”

you gone have to explain to him that it wasn't out of anger and was out of.. idk- i guess love??

goes from 🙁😔 to 🤨 rq

“um.. okay.”