kade-writes - Tumblr blog

[kade-writes]

For ellena

I look for you in everything

Bittersweet but it still stings

I’ll learn to live and love from a distance

Someday

I find you in everything

It didn’t have to be perfect to it to mean so much

Ill learn to stop telling everyone about you

Someday

[kade-writes]

Im too insane to title this

IVEHADTHREEENERGYDRINKSANDIFINNALLYSTOPPEDFEELINGLIKESHITIMONTOPOFTHEWORLDTHISISHOWIMMEANTTOFEELTHISISMEIMGOINGTOBEEVERYTHINGIMMEANTOBETHISISITTHISISITTHISISITIMHUNGRYTOBECOMEPERFECTHOLDMEUPONAPEDASTALITSWHEREIMMEANTTOBEIMMEANTTOLOOKYOUINTHEEYESANDHOLDYOUUPIMMEANTOSAVEYOUIMMEANTTOLOVEYOUHOLDMEANDILLHOLDYOUIMMEANTTOBEHATEDTOOSOHATEMEANDHURTMEJUSTSOITCANALLBEPERFECTILOVEWHENYOUHATEMEIMSOLOVEDANDSOHATEDIMPERFECTIMLOVELYSOLOVEMELOVEMEANDHURTMEANDHATEMEANDFIXMEBUTIFYOUDOANYTHINGJUSTLOOKATME

[kade-writes]

Another year

Sunken eyes and the faint pounding of my heart. No matter how many tear puddles i make on the blankets i cant seem to wash everything away. I try to bury myself in the middle of this empty house. Im erratic. It’s like I’ve shoveled caffeine pills into my mouth until they filled up my windpipe. Its like im fully aware of every nerve in my body and they are all telling me to get the fuck away. But im in no danger. Im rotting between a weather-inappropriate amount of blankets, pathetically paralyzed by what tomorrow could bring.

[kade-writes]

Tumblr reblog chains are in danger.

It seems that the staff is actually going to go forward with their decision to remove reblog chains, where reblogs will basically work like regular comments on other websites.

This doesn't just make the site completely unusable, it removes the soul of the community that has managed to build up here over the years, and that I'm so happy to have recently joined.

It makes impossible the creation of great posts where many people build up a single thing, until it is a gem of expressed human creativity.

There will be no more world heritage posts, no more messing around with your mutuals, no posts worth remembering.

There will be no more Tumblr, and the Tikblr or TumbTube or whatever monstrosity is born from its corpse will soon die, as is probably the best. And then there will never be another place like this on the internet, no place anymore to run to, no more fun, no more community.

I recommend a simple course of action. When these changes get imposed upon us, stop using Tumblr. Get your mutuals' discords, your favourite artists' websites, and leave. If the Tumblr we have once known returns, we well too. If not, better let it die quickly than suffer a long and painful decline.

I beg you to reblog this, for the more people see it, the higher chanses are for this to work.

And add something, so we can show them what Tumblr is really for.

[kade-writes]

WAHHHH FALL OUT BOY

Youll sit alone with your headphones over your ears, drowning out the static with his lyrics. You’ll (maybe) read them and cry. You’ll realize that he’s put words to weird and previously indescribable shit. You’ll look at him constantly. You’ll look at him and desperately want what he has, while deep down knowing that what “he has” is really a personal fantasy that could never exist but it’s easier to keep him at a distance than admit that.

Isn’t it messed up?

Now he’s up on stage, 20 feet away, Mouthing those words back to you, wearing a hoodie that you could have found in the back of anyone’s closet. You’ll start crying again. You’ll look at him and see the way he moves, just as excited as you are. But dancing is hard when your preoccupied with trying to find words for another overwhelming feeling that just completely swells every time you are in this situation . You’ll feel like the only person in the entire world (spotlit stage, front and center) while being squished and molded into the pile of bodies that surrounds you. You strangely love it. You’ll stare off. You’ll stop processing the bright lights youll no longer feel like your own. It’ll quiet down. He’ll talk about a heavy gross worry that loiters in your mind. He puts it into words again. You don’t understand how someone that you hold in the way you hold him could be so simple but true. You wont be able to help the salt spilling over your lower eyelids, Because really, what “he has” is similar to what you have too. You’ll see the visual of his eyes plastered up on the top of the stage staring down. You’ll stare back. you’ll subconsciously understand that watching from the outside will never give you the full picture. You’ll starve for everything you’ve ever wanted. You’ll become angry with yourself for hesitating. You’ll connect the face, the person to the writing, mentally refusing to let the poet hide behind his pen. He’s right there. He’s right there. You’ll breathe heavy and try to find some composure only to be interrupted by 3 hand muted guitar strums. Earlier you talked about how hearing this song would “litterally kill you.” Now, you’re hearing it. You’ll scream the lyrics so hard that you want to throw up. You’ll sound like some shitty metal vocalist. Your throat will sting. You wont notice or care. You’ll cry and cry and cry and cry tears that you can’t afford to shed. Look. No really. Look. He’s right there.

They’ll litter the air with pieces of excitement, blocking the sky. Look. He’ll Crawl into the crowd and the sea of people will naturally reach for him because you’re aren’t the only one who is experiencing another feeling that has no words and looking to him for him to give you the words. He’s right in front of your face. He understands how you are somehow without ever knowing you. And hes right there. Look him in the eyes and you’ll watch him look back at you, soaking eachother up in a way that is more than watching. Your fingers will carve into the air in front of you as you become increasingly desperate to prove the importance of this moment to him and everyone around you. This is one of the things he couldn’t possibly comprehend the way you do. You’ll feel his palm against yours and you’ll smile with every tooth in your mouth and he will too. The connection between your hands will surface the only clear thought you’ve had all night. Him and what he has isnt far from you. Hes right there. He understands you, and you understand him. He’s right here and you are too.

[kade-writes]

Good? Morning

(Ring Ring Ring Ring)

I crave death the way someone craves morning coffee

Energized, Driven by the bitter idea of my body

I don’t mean to accept the inevitable

I won’t make my life expectancy

I wasn’t meant to

The sheets are too heavy

Why get up

Why not rot right here?

(Five more minutes please)

Fantasize about

What it means to be dead

How I could do it

The letter id write

The tears

The blood

My blood

(Five more minutes, sorry dad im picking out my outfit)

Intoxicated by it all

Should I be driving like this?

In a good mood because I know its coming

Soon

It’s casual

Its constant

It’s obsessive

Its mine

[kade-writes]

Good night!

Lights off.

No more prodding painful eyes.

The soft ambience of the street unwinds the tighly wrapped string around my stomach.

Moonlight smeared up the side of my face.

Look for me in the darkness, quietness, peacefulness.

Thats the refuge.

Goodnight.

[kade-writes]

Good morning.

The sun peaks above the horizon

Painting my face in morning warmth

The weight of the day placed on my shoulders

My bones squeaking and adjusting underneath the crush

The earth greets me.

Good morning.

[kade-writes]

Hey yall new tumblr! I write shit sometimes.

About me, im Kade. I Like drawing, singing, writing poetry, short stories, fashion design and listening to music.