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justmywritingstuff · 8 months ago

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Speechless Changes~Number 6 (part 1)

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

AO3

Warnings: language, heavily implied abuse

Word Count: 13k+

Author's notes: Hello friends! Yes, I'm alive. I'm sorry for the delay, I messed up my wrist and shoulder in a car accident and the pain killers (and you know, my wrist) made it really hard to work on this series. This is a two part chapter, so the second part will come out soon. And this is the end of the series, there might be a sequel in the future, I haven't decided yet. This is a bit of a heavy chapter, so be prepared for that. As always, a line break means a change in POV, enjoy!

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It’s a good day for Marinette, one of the best she’s had in awhile.

She had aced a test in school, watched Chloe fall face first into a muddy puddle, Alya called her her best friend, and she’s currently beating the hell out of some girl in a magic ox costume with her lucky charm—it’s an umbrella—while Claw is trying to get her Miraculous. It’s a weird life, but sometimes it’s a damn good one.

The ox girl finally seems to fall back from the numerous hits, much to Shady’s displeasure—she was just starting to get into it.

Shady and Claw stand by her to make sure she stays down, Claw groans in annoyance and pulls out his staff to call someone.

She can’t help but ogle him as he does so, she loves this guy more than anything and he’s much more than a pretty face—but damn, she’s the first to admit he’s definitely a hot piece of ass, especially in the leather. She’s having a good day, but what would make it a fucking great day is the opportunity to drool over her attractive partner and get her daily dose of affection from those sinful lips of his.

The ox girl tries to get up, breaking Shady from her daydreaming. Shady sighs and hits her with the umbrella again, dazing her. Frankly, she’s amazed at how many hits to the head this girl can take and the fact that the umbrella hasn’t broken yet.

“Hello?” She hears Betterfly’s voice coming from Claw’s staff.

“Where the hell is this lady’s miraculous?” Claw asks, exasperated.

“What lady? Oh no, are you two fighting another holder?”

“Yeah, ox girl.”

“Ox? That’s one of the Supreme’s favorites! Are you two alright? I’ll send reinforcements right—”

“Hell no, we’ve already got it handled. Where’s the miraculous? This girl’s covered in fucking jewelry.”

“Oh um nose ring, I believe?”

“Great. Hang on, you’ll get it in a sec.”

Claw leans down to the semi-unconscious ox girl and grabs the nose ring, handing it over to Shady as the girl returns to normal. Shady puts it into her yo-yo to send it to Betterfly.

The girl groans loudly.

“What was that?” Betterfly asks accusingly from Claw’s staff.

“That’s the ox.” Claw says. “I told you, we got it.”

“…Shadybug used her Lucky Charm as a weapon again, didn’t she?”

Claw sends Shady a look. “Uh no?”

Betterfly sighs, and she can practically hear him rubbing his forehead tiredly. “We’ll talk about it later.”

Claw hangs up his staff and Shady sighs, knowing that tomorrow probably holds another long lecture about violence from Betterfly.

“Did you have to beat her with the fucking umbrella?” Claw says.

Shady shrugs and sends him a smirk. “She slapped your ass and made you uncomfortable. You would have done the same fucking thing if it was me instead.”

“…Fair point.”

She tosses her umbrella up in the air and does her miraculous cure. After all the usual things, damage is fixed, the girl thanks them for curing her disease but has a terrible headache, etc., Shady grabs Claw and leads him into a nearby tight alleyway to get them both away from any prying eyes as her miraculous beeps.

The alley is small, small enough that standing in it with backs to the walls would leave two people only a few feet apart. With how close the two of them choose to stand where they can feel the other’s breath on their face, though, it almost looks like the alley way is wide, but they just don’t understand personal space.

“You know Mothra’s gonna give you shit for today, cockroach.” Claw says with a smile as he plays with a loose strand of her hair.

“Yeah,” She answers, “but that’s tomorrow me’s problem.”

And she really believes that, she’s having a really good day today, so lectures and worrying about if solving problems with violence is becoming of a hero can be dealt with on another day.

“You’re in a good mood, Bug-a-babe.” Claw says teasingly. “I almost don’t recognize you without that pouty scowl on your face.”

She playfully punches him as her miraculous beeps again, signaling it’s final warning.

He grins and blinks like he’s realizing something.

“Something’s…different.” He says.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, fleabag.” She answers.

“Your suit.” He slowly brings his fingers down the side of her body and her breath catches. “I don’t know, it just looks…different somehow.”

“Oh? How?”

“Can’t put my finger on it, but it’s fucking distracting.”

She hums and leans in close, pressing her body against his as his gloved claws find their way to her hips.

“Distracting, huh?” She says. “Maybe I should just get the hell out of here then. Wouldn’t want to distract you from all your pretty boy shit.”

She starts to pull away, but his grip tightens on her hips before she can get far. It’s a dance they know, it’s usually done with a lot more punches and violence, but it’s a good day and she knows that he must be having a good day too to be so calm. On good days for both of them, neither of them feels the need to argue, it’s more playful and teasing.

“Oh no,” he says, “your spotted ass is stuck with me, cockroach.”

She blinks, taken aback at the familiar words she’s only heard him say once before.

~Flashback~

Swinging through the Parisian skyline wearing nothing but a bodysuit is not something she pictured herself doing, but feeling the rush of the wind in her face for the first time makes everything shitty about her life seem so trivial and forgetful…even the things that make her life hell seem so small in comparison.

Maybe that’s why the Supreme gave Marinette this Miraculous thing in the first place, he knew that once she got a taste of freedom from her shitty life she’d do anything to keep pushing—maybe that’s why he did a lot of things.

Marinette scowls to herself as she lands on a rooftop, what does she care what the Supreme does? He gave her power to do with as she pleases against some dumb butterfly guy, who is she to complain about such a great opportunity?

She flings her yo-yo at a weird pole to fling herself again. Why should she question any of this? So far, she hasn’t found any downsides to this whole superpowers thing.

Crash!

She crashes into something hard, getting dazed, and her yo-yo wraps itself around her and whatever it is. She groans and slowly opens her eyes to see a black mask attached to a not-unattractive face. She opens her mouth to scream at this guy in the mask as he groans and slowly opens his eyes, her mouth shuts as she’s meant with the most beautiful purple she’s ever seen.

He pulls his head back as soon as he sees her face, but she’s too mesmerized to really notice.

“What the…” The guy says. “Hey! Get me out of this fucking thing!”

The guy starts wiggling and Marinette realizes that their bodies are pressed together like something from a sex scene in a movie. She screeches as her cheeks heat up and quickly untangles them, her yo-yo bonking the masked guy in the head as they go onto a rooftop to have their feet on the ground.

As he rubs where the yo-yo hit him, Marinette finally gets a good look at him.

His hair is a weird green color, his eyes are a beautiful over-the-top purple, he’s covered in tasteful spikes and studs, there’s a bell around his neck for some reason, he’s wearing black lipstick, wearing perfectly form-fitting leather from head to toe, and has two cat ears on top of his somehow working-for-him mess of hair.

Hot damn are the only words that come to Marinette’s mind.

She chastises herself, she’s supposed to be wreaking chaos in the name of the Supreme, not ogling some eye candy who��s probably a huge asshole.

“That fucking hurt!” The attractive masked guy says. “What the hell is wrong with you, you psycho watermelon?”

And he’s got an attitude…hmm…maybe Marinette could spend a few minutes beating up the guy in skin-tight leather before she fucks up the butterfly guy. Not like she’s ever gonna see him again, how often would she get the chance to yell at a cat guy?

“I’m a fucking ladybug, asshole.” Marinette snaps back.

The guy rolls his pretty purple eyes. “You look more like a cockroach to me.”

“Yeah? Well, you look like a bag of fleas!”

“Hey!”

He grits his teeth and gets in her face.

“Cockroach!” He growls, pushing her.

“Fleabag!” She growls back, pushing him back.

“Bug breath!”

“Fuzz face!”

They snarl at each other, and she grabs him by the collar, preparing to threaten or punch him. His snarl falls as he sees a large purple butterfly coming towards them.

“What the fuck is that?” He says.

“That’s an akuma, you dumbass.” She says, still holding him by the collar. “It’s attracted to our anger.”

“Then stop being angry, dammit! We don’t need that fucking thing over here!”

Huh, so he’s not a complete dumbass.

They both take a deep breath to calm down and the akuma flies away.

Marinette is suddenly all too aware that she’s still holding him by his jacket and that their faces are close enough that she can feel his breath on her face. She tries really hard not to think about how good his cologne smells or look at his attention-grabbing lips as she quickly pushes his (totally not attractive) face away from her.

He clears his throat and picks her yo-yo off the roof, holding it out to her. “Here, your yo-yo thing.”

Wait, why would he do that? He didn’t need to do that, no one had ever helped her for no reason before…he’s got something more to him under all that attitude, it seems, something that is grabbing her attention.

Her heartbeat picks up a bit as her hand brushes his when she grabs her yo-yo.

Oh no, that needs to stop right there. It’s fine, probably nothing, it’s not like Marinette has to worry about seeing him again, she can completely forget about it and—

“You must be that partner the Supreme is forcing me to work with.” He says. “I’m the cat holder, name’s Claw Noir.”

Fuck. Great, attractive asshole is her stupid partner.

She crosses her arms then eyes him up and down, trying to figure out the kind of person he is. Everyone she’s ever met had always either been afraid of her or wanted her to be afraid of them. Her guess is the latter, if his attitude is any indication, which is going to be a huge fucking inconvenience.

“Damn, do you ever pay attention, cockroach?” Claw Noir says, breaking her from her thoughts. “I asked what I’m supposed to call you?”

“I’m…” She pauses, remembering the Supreme mentioned secret identities, and tries to think of a name for her new super powered persona. “Shady. Yeah, Shadybug.”

“Shadybug? I think cockroach suits you better.”

He eyes her for a moment and something familiar flashes in his eyes, something she recognizes.

She blinks, suddenly overly aware of the guy in front of her. She can see all of it in his eyes, he’s broken and fucked up just like she is (which isn’t surprising since the Supreme obviously went after a specific kind of person)…anger and violence are how people like them communicate. But, that’s not what’s holding her attention. No, what’s holding her attention is the fact that alongside all that anger and pain she can see in his eyes is also that he isn’t afraid of her and he doesn’t want her to be afraid of him. She had never met someone who didn’t interact with her using some kind of fear, it’s…intriguing.

Her heart beats a bit faster at the thought, but surely, it’s just from the adrenaline.

…Right?

Well, maybe it isn’t, but if it isn’t then there’s a problem, she can’t let herself fall for an asshole like him, especially if she’s stuck with him. Not when she finally has some power.

Claw Noir looks her up and down again then sighs tiredly. “Great, the Supreme stuck me with a bitchy partner, just great.”

Does he already hate her? What the fuck is his problem? He doesn’t even know her!

So, falling for him won’t be the problem, not killing him however…well, that might be difficult.

She scowls and sends him a deadly glare. She swings her yo-yo and hits him in the stomach with it.

“If I’m so bitchy,” She says, “then give me your Miraculous so I can get a partner that isn’t such a jackass.”

He glares back, not intimidated in the slightest but still not caring if she’s afraid of him. The nerve on him. He growls and extends his staff, swinging it at her, but she dodges before he manages to hit.

“Oh no,” He says, “your spotted ass is stuck with me, cockroach.”

As they start throwing punches at each other between yells and spreading chaos through the city, she decides that if she’s stuck with him and he hates her for no reason, then she swears she’ll always hate him harder than anyone else.

~End Flashback~

…That was the day they first met forever ago. The day she fell for the guy under all that pain and buried all her want under endless hate. They’ve come so far from that day, so many things have changed, but some things would always be the same. That was the day she fell for the heart under his pain, the day that under all the hate and anger her heart had become his and has always been since.

“What?” Claw says. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“You just reminded me of something.” Shady says with a smile. “It’s been a pretty great day, fuzz face, and you’re just making it better.”

“Really? Oh, you’re in a REALLY good mood.” He practically purrs. “Well, Bug-a-babe, I can think of something that would make this day even better.”

He leans in close, their noses touching, his hands still on her hips pressing their bodies together.

“Hmm, and what would that be, fleabag?” She says, her hands moving up his chest teasingly.

Claw opens his mouth to say something, but before he can, her transformation wears off and she immediately pushes him away so she can catch Tikki.

“Hey, what about…” Claw starts but Shady completely ignores him. He sighs and pouts. “Plagg, daggers in.”

Claw detransforms and catches Plagg.

“Hey, Tikki.” Marinette says. “Do you want a cookie or a macron? I can go get you something else too if you want.”

“Cookie’s fine, Marinette.” Tikki says.

She nods and pulls a cookie from her purse at her side—chocolate chip with a hint of fudge, Tikki’s favorite that Marinette always makes sure she has—it’s the last one in her purse. She makes a mental note to make more later.

She looks up to see Adrien pulling a wedge of cheese from his pocket and giving it to Plagg. She snorts, getting Adrien’s attention.

“You’re still bribing Plagg with that gross cheese?” Marinette says.

“Hey!” Plagg says, taking a very large bite of the cheese. “Leave my delicious camembert alone!”

“Yeah, it just became habit.” Adrien sighs tiredly. “I know, I smell like stinky cheese, but he loves it. So, I figure why not? Least I could do after…”

He trails off solemnly unable to finish his sentence. She knows what he means, though, he didn’t have to say it for her to know he’s talking about the muzzles.

She had felt uneasy about the muzzle even when she was evil, it seemed so cruel and unnecessary, but the Supreme had insisted. It’s also one of the reasons she took such joy taking the Miraculous out of his shitty minions’ control, each Miraculous they retrieve is another Kwami freed and a big ‘fuck you’ to the Supreme. It’s one of those things that her and Adrien kept unspoken—another thing they’re ashamed to have done before the other universe.

Tikki sees Marinette frown at the thought and flies up to nuzzle her cheek. Marinette smiles at the action, Tikki understands things better than most.

“Hey, I don’t remember,” Adrien says, eyeing Tikki curiously. “How did you get Tikki to forgive you for uh…well you know?”

“You don’t remember because I never said.” Marinette answers as Tikki flies to her spot in her purse.

“Well, how did you? You two seem almost inseparable now.”

“I didn’t do anything…we just kind of…are.”

And she hadn’t. She didn’t do anything to get Tikki to forgive her. She knows Adrien pulled out all the stops for Plagg, buying him as much expensive cheese as he can eat, flattery, countless apologies, etc.. But, all of that felt hollow to Marinette—not that she had an issue with Adrien doing it, of course—bribery, flattery, countless apologies, those aren’t things Marinette is fully capable of and doing so just would have been hollow excuses. She knows what Tikki is like with other her, she knows what they could be, and something like that shouldn’t come out of the way Marinette had treated her—she knows she doesn’t deserve it and no bribe or flattery or apology could ever make up for it.

And yet, it had. Tikki and Marinette didn’t talk much because Marinette herself didn’t talk much in her parent’s house, but Tikki had been nothing but kind and caring to Marinette from the moment she took off her muzzle. Tikki took care of Marinette when Adrien couldn’t, and whenever Marinette asks her why, she always says ‘I understand feeling trapped and not being able to do something…what it can make you do. I forgave you long before the other universe, Marinette.’ Marinette can never bring herself to respond to that.

She shrugs and sends Adrien a look. “That probably sounds fucking ridiculous.”

Adrien smiles and pulls her closer once again, leaning his forehead against hers. “Nothing you say could ever sound ridiculous to me.”

She hums and closes her eyes, taking in everything that is her partner with a smile. On days like this, her life doesn’t seem so shitty. As long as he’s here with her, her day could only get better from here.

“Good day, Bug?” Adrien whispers.

“As long as you’re here, yeah.” She answers, opening her eyes to look into his.

Adrien smiles even wider and presses a gentle kiss to her nose, lingering much longer than he really needs to.

She sighs contentedly and her hands move up his chest. “You probably have to get back for a photoshoot or something, huh?”

“Hell no, screw that. It’s been a good day, I wanna be yours for the rest of the night.”

That sounds perfect to her, but that doesn’t mean she has to make it easy for him.

“Hmm…” She pauses like she’s considering it. “…tempting, but I don’t know, fur face.”

Adrien whines and moves his lips down to her neck, ghosting over the one spot he knows drives her crazy.

“Please?” He says. “I want your spotted ass with me for as long as possible.”

He squeezes her butt to enunciate his point and she can’t help the smile that spreads across her face. Cheeky little asshole.

“Fine,” She says, giving in. “Can we go back to your place, then?”

“Yes!” He answers, way more excited than usual.

“You two are disgusting.” Plagg suddenly says. “Do you have to be gross in front of us every time?”

“Plagg, leave them alone.” Tikki says.

Marinette sighs as the two Kwamis ruin the little dance they have going on, usually they stayed quiet when her and Adrien are doing their little argue-tease-flirt-kiss dance, but lately Plagg has been much more vocal with his ‘distaste’ for them being together (he actually is completely supportive of their situation but pretends to find them gross). It’s simultaneously a good thing and a bad thing that Marinette has some mixed feelings about. On the one hand, she’s happy that Plagg is finally comfortable with them both to tease them and speak up. On the other hand, though, it’s very awkward to make-out when there’s two tiny gods talking about you right fucking next to you.

She steps back from Adrien, disentangling them as she stretches.

“Alright, fleabag.” Marinette says. “Your place. Can we go through the door, or do we have to go through the fucking window again?”

Adrien smirks and cocks his head to the side, telling her without words the answer to her question.

“Dammit.” She says, sighing. “We literally just detransformed. Fine, okay. Who’s turn is it?”

His smirk seems to get wider, even more mischievous.

“Oh, you asshole.” She says with a glare. “Of course, it’s MY fucking turn.”

He winks at her and she rolls her eyes.

“What can I say, Bug-a-babe?” Adrien says. “Someone’s gotta carry the team.”

She narrows her eyes at him and scowls. “Ugh, do you have to make the same pun every fucking time I do this? Tikki,” She turns her attention to the Kwami in her purse, “are you okay for another transformation?”

“I’m ready to go, Marinette.” Tikki answers.

“Great. Tikki, blots on!”

Tikki is sucked into Marinette’s earrings and Marinette transforms back into Shadybug.

She bends down and picks up Adrien in a bridal carry, which as always, he enjoys way too much in her opinion. She grabs her yo-yo and flings it to the top of the buildings the alley is between, slinging herself onto the roof. She runs from rooftop to rooftop with Adrien in her arms until she finally makes her way back to the Agreste mansion, jumping through the window to Adrien’s room before the security cameras have a chance to pick her up.

Shady places Adrien on the ground and stretches, Plagg wastes no time and immediately flies to the little bed and cheese corner Adrien set up for him.

Adrien wipes imaginary dirt off his black jeans as he gets his footing back, the smile on his face almost too bright in the darkly decorated room. She doesn’t know why he likes to be carried so much, but his expression afterwards is always super cute and it’s an excuse to have him in her arms, so she’s okay with it.

Her eyes fall on a full-body mirror that’s on his wall that wasn’t here last time she was in his room—well, maybe it was, every time she’s snuck into his room with him, they’re either completely focused on each other or they play video games on his couch, so maybe she hadn’t noticed it before.

She notices her reflection in the mirror and there’s all these new details in her suit that she’s sure weren’t there before, small and barely noticeable, but new details all the same. Adrien was right, she looks different, if she had been anyone else she never would have noticed. There’s more black around her gloves and ankles, there’s a small cluster of spots on her chest that look out of place, and her hair just seems slightly shorter. It’s hardly different from what it changed to after the other universe, but different all the same.

Adrien steps over behind Shady and wraps his arms around her waist. He nestles his chin into her shoulder and follows her gaze.

“See, cockroach?” He says. “I don’t know, somehow you just look…you don’t look so much like her anymore.”

Her as in Ladybug, as in her from the other universe. When they left the other universe, all she wanted then was to be more like her, she wanted her life, her friends, her world…her parents. Until she looked in the mirror, she hadn’t realized that she hadn’t wanted to be her in a long time—she still thought of her from time to time, wondering how Ladybug is doing or if she would be proud of who she’s become, but at some point she had stopped wanting to be her all together. She doesn’t know what the hell that means, but she likes to think that’s maybe a good thing.

Even Adrien noticed how different it is, despite how little differences there really are. Once again, she finds another reason to love this dumbass for everything he is in and out of the mask. But, as nice as it is that he noticed, that’s a conversation for maybe another day. As good of a day as this is, she doesn’t want to push it in case talking about the other universe brings up some heavy things for him.

She leans her head against Adrien’s, a small smile on her lips. “What, fleabag? Afraid I’m gonna put your pretty model ass out of work?”

He pinches her side with a grin as he detangles from her hips and she yelps in surprise. She curses the day he found out she’s ticklish, the asshole takes way too much advantage of it.

“Aw, you think I’m pretty, cockroach?” He teases. “How embarrassing.”

“Your cheeky ass is literally a model, Fur face.” Shady says with a roll of her eyes.

“Really obsessed with my ass today, huh Bug?”

She tries to scowl at him but can’t help the smile that spreads across her face. He leans in close with a knowing grin and raises his eyebrows at her. She chuckles slightly and immediately shoves his face away as he starts to laugh.

“You’re such a dumbass.” She chastises.

“Yes, but I’m your dumbass.” He dramatically blows her a kiss then starts looking around his room. “Now where did that bag go…I’m fucking starving, and that croissant is calling my name.”

She shakes her head and looks around the room, her eyes falling on a pastry bag she gave him yesterday by the end of his bed. Adrien sees it the same moment she does and makes a beeline for it. She smirks and grabs the bag before he can.

“Hey!” He says with a pout. “I fucking called that!”

She takes the croissant out of the bag and takes a big bite in front of him.

“Not my fault you’re slow without the suit, fleabag.” She says playfully.

“What?” He answers, offended. “I am not!”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“No way, I’m not slow.”

“Please, I could take you down easily, pretty boy.”

“The suit makes you faster and stronger!”

“Even if I didn’t use the enhancedness. You need to work on your punches.”

“Fine.”

Adrien stands up and gets in a ready position.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“You said I need to work on my punches, so I’m showing you that I don’t.”

“Oh?” She puts the rest of the croissant back in the bag and places it back on the ground. “You wanna spar?”

“Hell yeah. Take me on without using the enhancedness like you said, I bet I knock you on your spotted ass.”

“I bet you I knock you on your ass in your own bed.”

Adrien throws a punch and Shady blocks it. She throws one of her own and he blocks it too, they fall into a comfortable rhythm of both of them throwing punches or kicks—none of them really landing, even without using the enhancedness on her end, she has to admit that Adrien can hold his own against her.

She ducks and kicks her leg into his foot, knocking him off balance as she comes back up. She punches his chest and he falls backwards onto his bed. Shady jumps on his bed and pins him with her body before he has the chance to recover.

“Told you.” She says cockily.

She grins at Adrien lying beneath her, both of them breathing heavily. She notices his eyes are blown wide with lust as they dart from her lips to her eyes, the tension between them from the day feeling heavy in the atmosphere. His hands slowly move their way up her thighs, giving them a gentle squeeze to give her an idea of what he’s thinking.

She raises an eyebrow and drops her voice to a whisper. “Thought you were hungry, Cat?”

“Oh, I’m hungry alright.” He says, his voice an octave lower.

She isn’t sure who leans forward first, but their lips crash together like they need each other’s breath to survive.

She can never get enough of him, his entire being is a drug and she’s addicted. From the way he kisses her breathless to the way he moves his body into hers in moments like these, every bit of it feels like he’s made for her, like no one else would ever be able to make her lose control like he does.

She presses herself into him and moves her hands up his t-shirt covered chest.

Adrien grabs Shady’s hips as she presses into him while straddling his hips, their lips on each other’s in a way that she knows sets them both on fire. He moves his hand down to her butt and gives it a squeeze. She moans slightly and he takes the opportunity to put his tongue into her mouth. She accepts it easily against her own as she starts to pulse slightly against him, wanting to feel a little friction.

He sits up a bit without breaking the kiss, his hands still holding her butt and hips as she sits in his lap pulsing against him—starting to rub against her himself. The new position makes it easier to feel every detail of his body against her.

She wants him right now, and badly. And from the part of him she can feel against her suit pressing into her in a perfectly sinful way, she can tell he wants her too. If he keeps going like this, she’ll come undone before she even gets the suit off. They had both agreed a long time ago that the physical part of their relationship is fine in the super suits, but the full physical part should be without the suits…it seems unfair to Plagg and Tikki that they have to be apart of it.

She pulls back from the kiss, intending to detransform, but Adrien moves his mouth down to her neck and sucks on the one spot that makes her completely lose control. She moans loudly and moves her neck more to the side to give him better access, her hips grinding against his clothed sex. Her hands find their way into his hair and she gives it a little pull, just the way she knows he can’t get enough of.

While he continues his work on her neck she opens her eyes slightly, planning to recapture his lips in hers after she says the detransformation words, but she notices the clock by his bed and her stomach drops as she remembers something.

She pulls away from him a little.

“Shit!” Shady says. “Is that the time? Shit, shit, shit!”

She pushes him back and his back hits the bed with an ‘oomf’ as she pries herself off of him, falling off the bed in doing so.

“What?” Adrien says.

“I have to go!” She answers, trying to scramble to her feet.

“Go where?”

“I forgot I was supposed to clean up the bakery, if I get there quick enough, maybe no one will notice. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”

“But—”

She leans forward and grabs his face, kissing him on the lips and trying to convey every bit of want and longing she would have for him when she left. She pulls away suddenly, and he whines at the loss of contact.

“I’ll see you later, fleabag!” She says, already ready to jump out his window. “Love you, bye!”

Before he can respond, she swings her yo-yo out his window and flings herself across the Parisian skyline. She hates leaving him like this, but she’ll make it up to him later.

She quickly swings her way back to her parent’s bakery as fast as she can, praying to whatever divine beings there might be that she’ll be lucky enough to get there after everyone has fallen asleep so no one would notice she hadn’t cleaned up the bakery yet. It was a good day today, maybe she’ll catch a lucky break for once. She jumps through her trap door and lands softly on her bed as quietly as possible.

“Tikki, blots off.” She whispers.

She detransforms and Tikki falls into her hands. She needs to get down to the bakery without anyone knowing, clean it up, and get back up to her room without anyone knowing she didn’t do so sooner. But first, before anything else, Tikki needs to eat something. She looks around her room for food and sees the bag of cookies she keeps hidden peeking out from a drawer across the room.

She takes a deep breath and carefully gets down from her bed, tiptoeing quietly across the floor. The floorboard beneath her creaks and she curses to herself, hoping no one else in the apartment heard it.

“Marinette!” She hears her mother yell in Mandarin followed by stomping up the ladder that leads to her room and her stomach drops into her toes.

“Hide, Tikki.” Marinette says as she runs across the floor to put her in the drawer with the cookies.

“But Marinette—” Tikki says.

“Don’t come out. I’ll be okay.”

Marinette hears the latch to her bedroom being opened and takes in a shallow breath.

Suddenly, all at once, Marinette knows all too well that today isn’t going to be a good day anymore.

—

Adrien hasn’t seen Marinette for almost three days and it’s driving him insane.

Did he do something? Was she mad at him? He can’t think of a single thing he could have done to upset her, especially not with what a good mood she was in the other day in his room.

It’s probably nothing, but ever since the other universe they had never gone this long without seeing or talking to each other. Well, they had ‘talked’ a few times he supposes—but her sending one word replies hours after he messages her or leaving him on read doesn’t really count, it made him worried about her. And to top it off, his schedule has been packed with lessons or photoshoots and the Supreme hasn’t sent out another holder since their fight with the ox girl, so he didn’t have any opportunity to sneak away to her these past few days.

Which is why when she agreed to meet up with him this afternoon by that secret garden they had found awhile back he left right away to enjoy every minute he could with his Bug—completely skipping one of his lessons and ditching a photoshoot in the process. This little garden is hidden away from everyone behind an alleyway most people ignore, they had stumbled on it a bit back and it became their personal hangout place whenever they needed somewhere to go outside their suits. It’s a place where no one would bother them or annoy the hell out of him because he’s a model.

He needs to see her, he needs to know he had no reason to worry, so he’s been waiting for awhile—over an hour earlier than when she said she’d be here, but she doesn’t need to know that when she gets here.

“Cat?” He hears his favorite voice in the world call from the alleyway entrance.

He smiles and stands up from the bench he’s sitting on, anxiously looking at the sweets bag he brought for her beside him. Should he hold it? Just leave it there? He was trying to do something for her to show he was thinking about her in their time apart, he even did his makeup the way she said she likes best on him and threw on the black shirt she made for him, but now the sweets maybe feel like too much.

“Hey, Bug-a-babe.” He says looking in the direction the voice came from. “Did you miss…”

He trails off as he sees her for the first time in three days, whatever remark he’s about to say falling dead in his throat. And not because he’s stunned by her beauty, no, because something is very VERY wrong.

She’s wearing an oversized sweater on a hot day, she’s walking with a slight limp, her bangs are covering one of her eyes, and the usual light of her smile is just not there. He’s seen her like this a few times before and every time he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong about this, that it’s strange that when she’s like this there’s much more venom or malice in her voice than usual.

He meets her halfway on her way to the bench, engulfing her in a gentle but firm hug. She’s surprised for a second but quickly melts into his arms like she needs it.

“You miss me or something, pretty boy?” She says teasingly, but he can hear the relief in her voice.

“Always, Bug.” He answers, inhaling her scent. He pulls back and brings his hands down to hers as he turns. “Come on, let’s sit so we can—”

He freezes as he suddenly registers the feeling of her hand in his, instead of the usual warmth of her skin against his, there’s something scratchy like cloth. He turns back around and pulls her hand up to his eyes, slowly moving her sleeve back to reveal a bandage around her hand, wrist, and trailing up her forearm.

“Marinette,” He says, voice laced with concern as his eyes stay only on the bandage in front of him. “What is—”

“I just fell onto some glass.” She answers, quickly pulling her hand away. “It’s nothing, fleabag, I’m fine.”

“But I also saw you limping.” He says, eyes still focused on her hand at her side.

“Yeah, I fell pretty badly. You know how clumsy I can be, nothing too serious.”

She could be pretty clumsy outside the suit sometimes, he couldn’t count how many times she’d stubbed her toe on his bed frame or had bruises in weird places. But he’s never seen her hurt bad enough to need a bandage or anything out of the suit before…he doesn’t like it.

He kneels down and sweeps her up into his arms, carrying her bridal style.

“Hey!” She shrieks. “Put me down, asshole!”

“You sure as hell shouldn’t be walking on a hurt foot, cockroach.” He answers stubbornly, walking her toward the bench.

“I told you, I’m fucking fine.”

He places her down on the bench and sits next to her, pulling her legs into his lap so he can get a better look at her foot. He grabs the bag beside him and passes it to Marinette.

“Here,” He says, “I got you some sweets, you can eat them while I look at your foot.”

She sends him a glare as she opens the bag. It quickly turns to a slight smile when she sees all the sweets he got her inside. Technically, the bag is a bribe now to let him give her a once-over, but he cheers silently in his head that she doesn’t think the sweets are too much—not that she likely would anyway, Marinette has the biggest sweet tooth he’s ever seen.

She pops one of the chocolate candies into her mouth and he smiles a bit at the sight. He turns his attention back to her feet in his lap and gently pulls off her shoe to take a look at her injured foot.

Luckily, Marinette doesn’t fight him on it, she’s one of the most stubborn people he’s ever met but when it came to one of them being hurt whoever it was is always immediately out-stubborned by the other—in this case, him.

He checks her foot left to right as Marinette eats some more of the sweets, her foot is swollen but ultimately okay. He sighs and looks at her face, which is still on the bag of sweets.

“If you hurt your fucking foot,” He says sternly, “then you should be resting, cockroach. I would have come to you. You didn’t have too—”

“I know, I know.” She says, putting the bag to the side as she starts nervously fiddling with her fingers. “I just…I just really needed to see you.”

There’s something in her voice, something almost pained that makes him look at her like there’s a puzzle he can’t see etched into her features. She got like this sometimes, distant and broken and scared of something, even back before the other universe there had been days where he could tell something was really wrong—it happens sometimes out of the blue on a random day—but he’s never been able to pinpoint why.

He blinks, suddenly realizing this is the first time he’s really looked at her face since she got here. Looking at her fidget and trying to not seem as unnerved as she is, he can’t help but notice that she’s wearing much more eye makeup than usual. Thinking about it, she’s always been meticulous about her makeup but hates whenever someone brings it up, it’s like she always tries to change the topic. It’s almost like she’s trying to…his stomach drops as a terrible thought suddenly pops up in his head, one that’s never once crossed his mind before.

He takes in a deep breath, hoping to hell he’s wrong.

“I don’t wear the makeup anymore.” He says.

“What?” She asks, meeting his eyes.

“To cover up the disease from overusing our powers, I mean. I still wear eyeshadow and eyeliner, but I don’t wear the makeup anymore.”

She blinks at him, confused, and eyes him questioningly as she takes her legs off his lap. After a long pause, she finally responds, “…I noticed.”

“But you do.” He says, trying to tread carefully with what he’s trying to say.

“So?”

“At first, I thought it was maybe just habit or that you just felt more comfortable wearing it, but that’s not it, that’s not why you wear it. If it was out of habit, you wouldn’t be so meticulous about it and if you felt more comfortable wearing it, then you wouldn’t try to hide it whenever someone brings it up.”

Marinette says nothing and looks away from him, her shoulders suddenly tensing.

“Even back when I just watched you from my car window before everything, I wondered why.” He continues as he takes her hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. “I was always wondering why the hell someone so beautiful with and without makeup cared so much about hiding her face sometimes.”

Marinette looks at him nervously, a look in her eyes that pulls at Adrien’s heart strings, but she doesn’t try to get him to stop talking. She’s letting him continue to talk about the one thing she never let him speak about before, the one thing he knows she never let anyone talk about…not even herself.

“After everything that happened,” He continues, “we started spending more time together…I started noticing some things I didn’t see before.”

He swallows hard as she looks away, avoiding his eyes. He hates this, he hates that he has to bring this thing up that could cause her pain. He hates that he’s noticed all of these things that are starting to add up if his thought is right.

“How quickly your demeanor changes when you’re working in the bakery alone, how calmer you are.” He lists. “How you sometimes wear a bunch of layers even with the heat outside, and how angry you get whenever someone mentions you should take them off. How you always want to spend more time with me after and before school, how you always want to stay out just a bit longer and you just don’t want to go home yet.”

Before he had never really thought much of those things, he would ignore them as just habits she has or just wanting to spend more time with him—which maybe is also the case, but…

“How sometimes you flinch when I ask about things outside of school and our time together.” He continues. “How quickly you get quiet and change the topic when I bring up your house. How you never want me at your place when your parents are there.”

Adrien pauses and leans closer to Marinette, gingerly putting his thumb under her chin to bring her eyes to his.

“How…” He hesitates, trying to find the right words. “…How you have the most beautiful eyes in the world that I could get lost in, but you always seem to look away when I look too long like you’re worried.”

He pauses again and gently uses his fingers to push her bangs away from her eye, the makeup on it thick and dark but at closer inspection, likely not makeup at all.

“…And how you hide behind your hair often but even more after you came home late the night before or made a mistake in the bakery.”

Marinette leans into his touch, tears forming in her eyes. She rips her gaze from his as her lip starts quivering.

He knows how much she hates crying, he knows she doesn’t want him of all people to see her cry, the fact that she’s this close to doing so means this is something really serious and terrible. Which doesn’t give him hope that he’s wrong about what’s happened, and damn does he really hope he’s wrong.

Adrien gently places his hands on both of her cheeks, rubbing comforting circles into them with his thumbs as he brings her gaze back to look at him. A tear falls down her cheek and he wipes it away.

“Marinette,” He says with hundreds of emotions dripping into his voice. “You are my partner, my best friend, my everything more and inbetween. I would never do anything to hurt you or force you to tell me anything, I never want to be the reason you’re in pain. So, you don’t have to answer me, you don’t have to say anything. But I…fuck…I need to ask. It’s…it’s your parents, isn’t it?”

Marinette closes her eyes and takes in a shallow breath, her tears falling freely to confirm his suspicions.

Adrien kisses her sweetly and pulls her into a hug as she starts to cry with everything in her. He pets her hair, and she holds him like he might slip away, like he’s the thing grounding her to earth.

As she sobs into his shirt, he feels his own tears form in his eyes—whether tears of anger or hatred or sadness, he isn’t sure. On the one hand, he feels heartbroken that his partner, his friend, his love—the one person that makes this shitty world feel like it isn’t so shitty—has been living with something so terrible for who knows how long. On the other hand, he feels like he could burn the whole world to the ground for the mere idea that anyone fucking dared to hurt HIS Marinette like this. He shoves both of those feelings down for the moment, his only focus has to be on Marinette.

“I’m here.” He says trying to comfort her with the only words he knows he can. “Stay with me. Breathe.”

Her hands clutch his shirt like a lifeline and he holds her firmly in his embrace to show he means it, that he’s here with her and would never turn away.

“I’m here.” He says. “I promise I’m here.”

The more he learns about this girl, the more he understands her, so many parts of her start to make more sense. The anger, the willing to do anything, the tears when the wish didn’t work in the other universe…the reason she is who she is and was suddenly became much clearer to him. And it makes him love her more than he already did, which he didn’t think was possible. He knows he will always do anything for her, he’s hers in every sense of the word, and no way is anyone ever laying a damn finger on her ever again if he has anything to say about it.

Her crying doesn’t stop but her sobs become less frantic. He squeezes her tightly and grits his teeth, anger and rage still bubbling inside him at the thought of Marinette’s parents even thinking about…

“You are not going back there.” He says, barely managing to say it without transforming and running off to wipe the Dupain-Chengs off the face of the fucking planet. He isn’t sure if he’s telling it to her or to himself, either way, he knows he’ll never let her go back to that wretched place again, not without him by her side.

“I…” Marinette says into his shirt. “…I don’t have anywhere else to go.”

“Yes, you do.” He says, pulling her back slightly to look her in the eyes. “You have me, you’ll always have me.”

“But—”

“No, no buts. Today, tomorrow, fifty fucking years from now, you have me. You’re not going back there.” He leans his forehead against hers, their noses touching, and takes her cheeks in his hands. “I won’t let them hurt you ever again. You can stay with me, at the Resistance, or we’ll find you a place, but that damn hell hole is not home for you. You are my home, Marinette, if you’ll have me and want me to be, I can be yours.”

She sniffles and lunges forward, wrapping her arms around him as she reburies her face into his shirt. He can feel her shaking and start crying all over again, there’s only one thing he can think might help.

“Plagg, daggers out.” He says and transforms, wrapping his arms around her to hold her.

The moment his clothes turn into his super-suit, his breathing immediately turns to a purr that rumbles from deep in his chest. He finds the purring a little embarrassing sometimes, but it always seems to calm Marinette down when they argue or deal with a rough fight. She told him once that something about hearing it brings her feet back to the ground and reminds her that he’s there. He hopes that’s also true for when she’s broken like this…he doesn’t think there’s something he can say for something like this, but he needs her to know he’s here with her.

Remarkably, his purring seems to calm her down. They sit in silence as she catches her breath and slowly seems to recover, he doesn’t dare move but she nuzzles into his chest making him purr louder—she can tease him all she wants about it, he doesn’t care as long as it helps her.

He tries to keep his anger in check as he waits for her to be okay again. He wants to be what Marinette needs right now, someone to hold her and comfort her, but it feels so fucking hard as it hits him that this is the first time she’s had someone to comfort her about this. He’s the person who’s there for her for something like this and he also hasn’t been by her side in days.

Three days. He hasn’t seen her in three fucking days. Who knows what she was dealing with in that time? She could have ended up in the hospital or worse because of those damn monsters she calls parents. If he had been there than she wouldn’t…he shoves those thoughts out of his mind, all that matters is that both of them are here now and he won’t let it happen again—those thoughts can be saved for later when he raises hell and makes them pay, they have no place in his head while Marinette is falling apart in his arms.

“You must think I’m so weak.” Marinette whispers.

He kisses the top of her head. “Never. You’re the strongest most amazing fucking person I’ve ever met.”

She sniffles and hums, moving her head up to rest against his leather-clad shoulder. Although she still looks like she’s breaking apart inside, at least she isn’t crying as much. She fiddles with the bell around his neck—the bell that feels like it’s meant to be hers—as he continues purring, the soft calming jingle barely loud enough to hear.

“I lied to you...I never wanted to lie to you. But I…” She says, almost fighting fresh tears.

“I don’t care about that, Marinette, I care about you.”

“…I’m sorry.”

He pulls her into his lap and rests his chin on her head. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for, Bug. You’ll never have to be sorry for any of this.”

She sighs and curls into him as they fall into silence again.

He isn’t sure how much time passes as they sit there like that, it feels like days but he knows it’s probably only a few minutes. He wishes they could sit there like that for days as if the rest of the world isn’t as shitty as it really is, but the world keeps spinning and that means they keep moving.

“What do we do now?” She whispers in a voice that almost breaks his heart.

“Now, I take you home and we worry about the rest later.”

“Home? As in—”

“Yeah, as in my place.”

“But what about your father?”

“He can fucking deal with it. I don’t care what he thinks.”

“…Okay.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Marinette isn’t normal, she knows and understands that. She’s never been normal. She’s always keeping secrets, holds her emotions close to her chest, and hides behind her mask as Shadybug to understand what she’s really feeling. So, when the biggest most terrible secret she holds close to her bruised and battered chest is finally discovered by Adrien…she doesn’t know what to do.

As soon as she stops crying, she does the only logical thing her brain can think of: she convinces herself that this is all a stupid nightmare.

Even as Adrien detransforms in the street by his house and leads her through the gated entrance to his front door (which is notably the first time she’s even seen this side of the house—she usually only goes in through his window), she still can’t believe she could have been so careless as to actually let Adrien see her so weak.

Even harder to believe that Adrien would let her come into his house with complete disregard to his father—that in itself is enough to make Marinette think she’s dreaming.

“There you are, Adrien.” His father says as he comes down the steps by the front door they enter through. “I was worried when you missed your lesson and photo shoot this afternoon. You know better than to…who is this?”

“This is Marinette.” Adrien answers assertively. “She’s my…she’s um…”

His father looks her up and down, scrutinizing her suspiciously. It makes Marinette’s skin crawl that this man who makes Adrien’s life so difficult would dare to judge her, so she returns his look with a threatening glare.

“Is she the reason you missed a lesson and the photo shoot?” His father asks, his eyes on Marinette turning angry and staying only on her.

Adrien grits his teeth, clearly annoyed at his father’s tone towards Marinette. “She’s staying here with us for awhile.”

“Absolutely not.”

“I’m not asking.”

“…Adrien, you can’t—”

“She’s. Staying.” Adrien growls, his protectiveness that comes out when he’s Claw seeping into his voice like a threat—she’s surprised to hear it directed at his father, Adrien had always mentioned to Marinette that he couldn’t find it in him to stand up to his father most of the time.

“Adrien,” Marinette whispers, “it’s okay, you don’t have to—”

“Adrien,” His father says sternly, regaining his attention. “Can I speak to you privately?”

“No.” Adrien answers. “If you have something to say, you can say it to both of us. I’m not leaving her until she’s set.”

“Fine. You can’t just let some random girl stay in our home.”

“She’s not some random—”

“Clearly, she’s also probably the reason you missed a lesson and a photoshoot—and if I had to guess, it’s likely not the first time she caused you to do so.”

“That’s not—”

“Her hand is wrapped in a bandage and that’s probably a black eye hiding under her makeup, isn’t it? So, she’s been fighting too if I had to guess.”

“You don’t know what—”

“She clearly isn’t a good influence and very obviously spells trouble. I won’t let you bring yourself down with someone like this, you have so much potential to be someone great, Adrien. I won’t let you throw everything away by aligning yourself with a girl like her, you’re better than that.”

Adrien grits his teeth and turns himself and Marinette around, walking away from his father. “She’s. Staying.”

“I won’t allow it.” His father says from behind them. “I’m disappointed in you, Adrien.”

At that, Marinette freezes in her tracks.

Adrien is trying to be better, he’s trying to protect her and keep her safe in this dream—anyone who knows him should be proud of him. But his damn father is talking down to him like he’s some kind of monster for doing this one thing. Where the hell is the justice in that? If anyone is a monster, Marinette thinks it would be her…that’s how her parents treat her, her own mother has screamed at her numerous times that she’s a clumsy freak who’s wasting space. How could anyone treat her favorite person in the world like that? She couldn’t stand for that.

Marinette clenches her fist and whips around to his father. If this is a dream, then she might as well start swinging. She knows this won’t end well even if it is a dream, too late to stop now, her mouth is already moving with venom before she can consider this as a bad idea.

“Hey, fuck-head!” She yells at his father, stomping toward him as quickly as she can with an injured foot. “Your son is a fucking masterpiece work of art who’s doing his best and you’re an asshole for ignoring him. Stop being a fucking dickhead! He’s the most incredible person I know and I’ll be damned if I let anyone tell me to stay away from him. You can have a problem with me all you want, but don’t you fucking dare try to make him feel bad about himself because of it you piece of shit!”

Adrien and his father gape at her, speechless and stunned in place, and it suddenly dawns on her the very high likelihood that this actually isn’t a dream…and she just yelled at Gabriel Agreste and insulted him…repeatedly.

She shrinks into herself, feeling the need to beat herself up at the sudden realization of what she had just done. That’s exactly what she always imagined saying to Adrien’s father whenever Adrien told her about his issues with him…she never thought she would ACTUALLY say that to him the first time they met.

After a moment that seems to feel like an eternity, his father clears his throat and scrutinizes her.

“You care about my son?” His father says.

Marinette looks to her feet and nods, feeling like the world is going to cave in on her.

“Adrien,” his father continues, “why does she need a place to stay?”

Adrien joins Marinette’s side and puts a protective arm around her, an underlying threat in his voice as Marinette feels his eyes on her. “I won’t let her go back to that damned place she calls home. I won’t and I can’t, she deserves somewhere safe, and that’s here by me.”

His father hums thoughtfully and Marinette meets his eyes.

The distrust and judgement in his eyes that previously set her on edge is completely gone, in it’s place is a kind of…realization Marinette can’t place—but the malice behind it, seems like it’s gone, and Marinette doesn’t know how to feel about that.

“Marinette, was it?” His father says.

Marinette nods in affirmation, taking in a breath to prepare herself for what’s about to come.

“We have a guest room you’re welcome to stay in for as long as you like.” His father continues. “I’ll get you set and don’t be afraid to ask for anything you need. Adrien, while I get her comfortable in the guest room, go ask the chef to make something for her, she’s probably hungry.”

“W-what?” Adrien asks, dumbfounded.

“Adrien, go get her something to eat.” His father insists. “I’ll help her to the guest room, we want her to be comfortable here.”

Adrien tightens his grip on Marinette protectively.

His father eyes them and sends them a gentle smile—Marinette can see why it annoys Adrien so much with everything he’s said about his mom, his smile seems so nice and genuine and so…wrong.

“It’s okay, Adrien.” His father continues. “I promise we’ll take care of her, she’ll be alright.”

Marinette isn’t sure how it happens, but next thing she knows Adrien is running to the kitchen and Gabriel Agreste is directing her into an elegantly decorated empty bedroom.

She awkwardly sits on the edge of the bed as Mr. Agreste stands by the door. For a moment she’s terrified he’s going to shut it and raise hell against her for what she said or worse if he closes the door and reacts like her parents would…the thought of something like that happening to her so close to Adrien is the most terrifying idea she may ever have.

Thankfully, Mr. Agreste leaves his place at the door and kneels to the floor in front of her, so she calms down slightly—only slightly, as Gabriel Agreste is now mere inches from her face and she literally just insulted him to his face…repeatedly.

“I’m sorry for being so abrasive, Miss Marinette.” Mr. Agreste says. “I worry about my son and many people try to take advantage of him…I was worried you might be doing the same since he’s a model, wealthy, and famous.”

His father is nicer than Marinette pictured, which sets Marinette’s teeth on end knowing how much Adrien goes through because of him. She might not be in a great place right now with what Adrien now knows about her, but she’ll be damned if she lets Gabriel Agreste not be read for the filth he is—even if he is a little nice and even if she would deal with terrible consequences. She’s already insulted him, she probably can’t make it worse at this point, right?

“I would never hurt Adrien, I don’t fucking care about any of that.” Marinette says almost threateningly. “Maybe if you weren’t such an asshole, you’d know that he fucking despises anyone who would care about that shit.”

Fuck. Why did she say that? Now he’ll know that she meant every word, she could’ve backtracked or made up some excuse, but no she has to run her big mouth. Apparently, yes, she probably can make it worse.

“I’ll let that one slide given the circumstances.” Mr. Agreste says. “You’ve got some bite to you, I respect that. But what I respect most is your concern for my son, he’s never introduced me to one of his…” He pauses like he’ s carefully choosing the word. “…friends before. I trust his judgement, if he thinks you need to stay here then you’re more than welcome to stay as long as you wish. But…”

Marinette blinks, not sure if this isn’t her imagination playing tricks on her. “But?”

Mr. Agreste shifts his weight uncomfortably, trying to avoid her gaze. “But…your black eye?”

Her hands clench into fists at the sudden reminder of what got her into this situation in the first place and the painful memory that goes along with it.

“What about it?” She answers with venom dripping into her voice.

She knows Mr. Agreste didn’t mean anything by it, but she knows he was entering dangerous territory and felt the need to warn him to not tread further—the only person she would even consider in that aspect is Adrien.

“I won’t pry.” He answers calmly. “But with the way Adrien is protective of you and you needing a place to stay…I have a feeling I was wrong about how you received it and if that’s the case…well, I’m sorry for assuming and hope I can help. Stay in my house as long as you need, I won’t send you back to a place that’s bringing you pain.”

There’s a quiet knock at the open door and they both look up to see Adrien holding a tray with some food on it.

“Nette?” Adrien says, eyeing his father suspiciously as he walks into the room. “Are you okay? Did he fucking—”

“I’m fine, Adrien.” Marinette quickly answers. “We were just…talking.”

“Yes,” Mr. Agreste says as he stands, “I was just getting to know our new house guest a bit better.”

Adrien sends his father a suspicious glare and places the food tray on the bed by Marinette. He opens his mouth to say something, but his father speaks before he can.

“We should give her some space, Adrien.” Mr. Agreste says. “It’s probably been a long day, we should leave her alone to eat and get some rest.”

“But—”

“Adrien…” Mr. Agreste says more sternly.

Marinette reaches for Adrien’s hand, gaining his attention, and gives it a gentle squeeze.

“Adrien,” Marinette says, “it’s okay, I’ll be okay.”

“Are you sure? Because I can—”

“Go on, Adrien, I’ll be alright. I have my phone and my purse.”

She emphasizes her last word, hoping that Adrien understands her double meaning. She knows he doesn’t want her to be alone, but his father won’t let him stay, so she’s trying her best to convey that she won’t be alone—Tikki is waiting in her purse.

Adrien nods in understanding and a moment of silent communication passes between them that Marinette knows means they’ll be seeing each other later.

“Okay,” Adrien says, his eyes never leaving hers. “But call me immediately if you need anything.”

“I will.”

Mr. Agreste escorts Adrien out of the room and he watches her as they leave, worry clear on his face. Marinette hates that he might think she’s weak, but a part of her is actually relieved that he cares so much.

Adrien closes the door behind them and Marinette releases the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding in.

Tikki flies out from Marinette’s purse once they’re alone, floating inches from her face.

“You should eat and rest, Marinette.” Tikki says.

“I’m fine, Tikki.”

“No, you’re not. You haven’t been fine since long before I came into your life…long before the other universe.”

“I’m not weak Tikki.”

“No, you’re not weak, you’re strong and smart and capable and much more. But, you’re not okay.”

“But I—”

“Marinette, you’re in shock. Please, let Adrien help you with this.”

“But—”

“Marinette,” Tikki says more sternly. “I wore a muzzle for centuries and have been forced to do things I didn’t want to do. I’ve been in pain, abandoned, misused, and tormented. I know what it means to be hurt by someone who is meant to protect you, I know what it does to you and the things it makes you do. Please, listen to me about this and let Adrien help.”

Marinette closes her mouth and guiltily avoids Tikki’s eyes. Tikki barely, if ever, spoke about how things had been before the other universe…everything the small Kwami had been through. And Marinette had never wanted to cause Tikki pain, she knew how it felt to be reminded of the thing that could destroy you, so she never asked.

Marinette slowly grabs some of the food and starts eating, Tikki smiles slightly and watches her eat to make sure she eats enough.

They don’t say another word and there’s a gentle understanding between them as Marinette finishes the food and lays back on the bed. It’s soft and the blankets are thick—far better than the hard mattress and thin blanket she’s always known.

She looks out the large window by her bed, it’s dark and well into the night. How long had she been here? Had it been hours? Minutes? Would her parents notice she’s gone?

She feels fresh tears forming in her eyes at the thought of her parents and bites her lip so hard she draws blood. She runs her hands over her wrapped hand, the tears falling freely as she remembers how it happened—how it really happened.

She shakes her head, trying to focus on something—anything—else, and looks around the room.

There’s expensive art and furniture everywhere, far nicer than anything Marinette has ever known in her whole life, but it’s also comfortable and tasteful. The room is…nice. She tries to close her eyes and go to sleep, but despite the comfortable bed and the welcoming ambiance of the room she feels completely restless.

The silence is deafening and a reminder of why she had ended up in the Agreste house in the first place.

Maybe Tikki is right, maybe she’s been in shock all day because she’s never told anyone the truth about her parents. Maybe she’s in shock at the fact that Adrien would help her with something like this. Maybe she buried her emotions for so long that she didn’t know how to fully feel them. Maybe this had never been a dream. Maybe her parents really are monsters. Maybe they never cared about her in the first place.

Maybe, maybe, maybe…

There’s so much she isn’t sure of and will never be sure of, so much she’ll never understand. But one thing that she does understand is that there’s one thing she’s always been sure of.

She snaps her eyes open and leans forward. This bed is incredibly nice and comfortable, but…she can’t sleep alone.

“Tikki?” Marinette whispers, hoping her Kwami is awake.

“I’m here, Marinette.” Tikki answers, suddenly flying in front of her face. “I’m always here.”

Marinette hugs her knees to her chest. “Tikki I…I can’t sleep when I’m…when I’m…”

“You can’t sleep alone.” Tikki finishes for her.

Marinette nods and closes her eyes as a tear falls down her cheek.

“When you’re alone all you see is them and what they’ve done to you, isn’t it?” Tikki says.

Marinette nods again, glad that she didn’t have to say the reason she can’t sleep out loud.

“You’re not alone, Marinette.” Tikki says. “You’ll never be alone again, you have me and you have Adrien. We won’t ever let you be alone again, we won’t let you go back to that place.”

Marinette slowly opens her eyes and meets Tikki’s gaze. “I know, Tikki. I just don’t…I need to…”

Tikki smiles and gently hugs Marinette’s knee. “You need to see him?”

Marinette nods.

“You only have to ask.” Tikki continues.

“Tikki, can I…”

“Of course. You know the words, Marinette.”

“…Thank you. Tikki, blots on!”

Tikki is immediately sucked into Marinette's earrings and she transforms into Shadybug.

Without a moment’s hesitation, she opens the window and jumps out, quickly swinging over to the other side of the house where she knows Adrien’s room is. Thankfully, the window is open like it has been at night for as long back as she can remember…if her head wasn’t so clouded, she’d probably be wondering if he left it open just for her like she had for him with her balcony.

She stops that thought in its tracks, she can’t let herself think of that place…she can’t let herself go there, at least not for tonight, tomorrow she can let herself feel all of that.

She jumps through Adrien’s window and he immediately leans up from his bed.

“Bug?”

“Did I wake you up?”

“I wasn’t sleeping…I was thinking of transforming but I…”

“Tikki, blots off.” A pink light flashes and Marinette detransforms. Tikki sends her a concerned glance then flies off to Plagg’s corner to rest.

Adrien rips the blanket off and comes to her side, pulling her into a bone-crushing hug. “What’s going on, Bug?”

“I just wanted to see you, after everything today and everything you know now…I was worried that you wouldn’t…that we weren’t…”

Adrien pulls back to look her in the eyes. “Nothing could ever change what this is, Marinette. Nothing. Your spotted ass is stuck with me, now and forever.”

Marinette feels a warmth spread through her hearing him say he would never leave her like everyone else had. She knows he’s trying to lighten the mood to maybe get her to smile after the day they had together and hearing those familiar words he said the first time they met just further reminds her of how far they’ve come from who they once were.

“I couldn’t sleep in there.” Marinette says, quick to change the subject so her thoughts don’t wander where they don’t belong. “…In a new place and bed I don’t know, it just felt so…wrong.”

Adrien nods in understanding. “You can sleep in my bed, Nette.”

She nods awkwardly and sits on the edge of the bed, looking at her hands. Adrien kneels in front of her and rests his head on her knees similar to a housecat waiting for attention. The thought of the infamous Claw Noir acting like a domesticated housecat almost makes her smile—almost.

“Are you okay, Bug?” Adrien asks.

If it were anyone else, Marinette would say fine and aggressively change the subject, maybe throw in an insult or threat for good measure.

But this isn’t just anyone. This is Claw Noir, her partner and the only person who understands her. This is Adrien Agreste, her best friend and the person who makes the world less shitty. This is her fleabag, fur-face, pretty boy, and Cat—her everything more and inbetween.

“No,” Marinette answers with tears starting to form in her eyes. “No, I’m not okay. I don’t know if I’ll ever be okay, Adrien. I…I’ve been burying my feelings for so long that I’m not sure how to feel them and this…m-my parents…I…I don’t know anything else. It’s all I’ve known my whole life and I know I’m fucked up. But I’m terrified that I’m going to fuck us—this—up and you’re the best thing that’s ever fucking happened to me. I can’t, I won’t—"

Adrien leans forward and hugs her hips, resting his head against her knees. A low vibration going against her that immediately calms her down and causes her to stop talking, something that had only ever happened when he’s transformed as Claw Noir. It takes her a moment to realize what’s happening: he’s purring. She didn’t even know he could purr as Adrien.

He slowly stands up and leans his forehead against hers, his purring quiet and hard to hear, but a sound Marinette would know anywhere.

“You’re not going to fuck this up, Marinette.” Adrien whispers. “I promise that won’t happen.”

Marinette hums. She’ll fight like hell to believe him, but how can she when her whole life the people who are meant to care for and love her called her a useless fuck-up? She doesn’t know how to believe she won’t, but with Adrien…with Adrien maybe she could learn.

“You should get some sleep, Bug.” Adrien whispers, which Marinette knows is his way of saying he means it without pushing past a boundary she isn’t ready to cross. It’s always been a relief to her all the things they could say without ever using words, especially when her head isn’t on right.

Marinette nods as Adrien takes his hands off of her and she lays down on his bed to get comfortable. Tomorrow she could feel all those things she’s buried, all the hurt and the pain she kept hidden. Tomorrow she could let the truth sink in, but tonight, she just wants to feel completely safe.

Adrien takes a step away and Marinette immediately grabs his arm, knowing there’s more to say between them. She swears she can almost hear both of them saying the things they never would because, why would they need to when the other already knew?

“Are you sleeping here?” Marinette says. Please don’t leave me alone.

“I can sleep on the couch or in another room if you want.” Adrien answers. I’m here, whatever you need.

“No, I don’t want you to go.” You’ve done so much for me already.

“And I don’t want to go.” Anything for you.

This is the person that had been closed off and hated her. This is the person who had her heart from the very beginning and showed her the way out of the darkness. This is the person who’s always meant more to her than anyone else, even before she accepted that fact. She wants him to understand that, that with every broken promise or violent attempt to please the Supreme, every day before and after the other universe, the one thing that had always been the best part of her life has been him.

“Then stay.” Marinette whispers, knowing he’ll understand what she really means. I love you. I always have.

Adrien blinks and a gentle smile spreads across his face. “Okay.” I love you. I always will.

She falls asleep in his arms knowing that she could feel the world crashing down on her tomorrow and every day after, but for now—just for a moment in his arms—she has a little peace.

#speechless changes #claw noir #fanfic #miraculous ladybug #shadybug #adrinetteapril2024 #villains #reverse crush #sharing bed #found family #flirting

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justmywritingstuff · 10 months ago

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@beatrice1979a Yep. Very much real over here.

last song: Enemy by Imagine Dragons

fav color: Ocean blue

last movie/show: The Musketeers

sss: Sweet, I have the biggest sweet tooth ever.

last thing i googled: Weirdest facts about sea creatures (My favorite fact that I found in case anyone's interested--the flapjack octopus lives on the seafloor where instead of using camouflouge like most octopus' to survive, it lays completely flat resembling a pancake which is where it's name comes from.)

current obsession: Reverse Miraculous Ladybug

last book: The Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas

looking forward to: My wrist being fully healed.

I don't really have anyone tag, but I was asked, so I figured why not.

Get to know me/People to know better

thank you so much for tagging me @cosmmicdancer :)

last song: bobby sox by green day, I think

favorite color: yellow or a yellowy orange

last movie/tv show: the OA

sweet/savoury/spicy: I need a perfect balance between sweet and savoury/spicy, because of the tism, but my wife would say its definitely sweet

last thing i googled: bahnstreik 2024 (hello fellow germans)

current obsession: moral panics and everything surrounding them

last book: currently reading stone butch blues

looking forward to: my wife getting their passport and moving in with me after almost 4 years of long distance <3

tags: @leaskisses444, @signforsign, @starsendlessly, and @amarettofemme and @sunkissedbutch, because we recently became mutuals and you seem like darlings :)

(absolutely no pressure to participate )

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justmywritingstuff · 10 months ago

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Speechless Changes Number 6 (Sneak peek)

Hey everyone! I know you were probably expecting the next and final chapter to Speechless Changes, but it's not done yet. It's the longest of all the chapters and is the kind of the ending--possibly not, I have an idea for a sequel, but haven't decided if I want to write it yet--so I want to make sure it turns out the way I'd like it too. It's just taking longer than I hoped it would to get everything written with life and all the fun stuff. So, sorry, no Chapter 6 for this update.

However, since people seem to like my work, I figured I'd give everyone a sneak peak to sate them until the final chapter is finished. So, here's a short sneak peek of the beginning part of the next chapter if anyone's interested.

(I promise I'll finish Number 6 as soon as I can guys)

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It’s a good day for Marinette, one of the best she’s had in awhile.

She had aced a test in school, watched Chloe fall face first into a muddy puddle, Alya called her her best friend, and she’s currently beating the hell out of some girl in a magic ox costume with her lucky charm—it’s an umbrella—while Claw is trying to get the miraculous. It’s a weird life, but sometimes it’s a damn good one.

The ox girl finally seems to fall back from the numerous hits, much to Shady’s displeasure—she was just starting to get into it.

Shady and Claw stand by her to make sure she stays down, Claw groans in annoyance and pulls out his staff to call someone.

“Hello?” She hears Betterfly’s voice coming from Claw’s staff.

“Where the hell is this lady’s miraculous?” Claw asks, exasperated.

“What lady? Oh no, are you two fighting another holder?”

“Yeah, ox girl.”

“Ox? That’s one of the Supreme’s favorites! Are you two alright? I’ll send reinforcements right—”

“Hell no, we’ve already got it handled. Where’s the miraculous? This girl’s covered in fucking jewelry.”

“Oh um nose ring, I believe?”

“Great. Hang on, you’ll get it in a sec.”

Claw leans down to the semi-unconscious ox girl and grabs the nose ring, handing it over to Shady as the girl returns to normal. Shady puts it into her yo-yo to send it to Betterfly.

The girl groans loudly.

“What was that?” Betterfly asks accusingly from Claw’s staff.

“That’s the ox.” Claw says. “I told you, we got it.”

“…Shadybug used her Lucky Charm as a weapon again, didn’t she?”

Claw sends Shady a look. “Uh no?”

Betterfly sighs, and she can practically hear him rubbing his forehead tiredly. “We’ll talk about it later.”

Claw hangs up his staff and Shady sighs, knowing that tomorrow probably held another long lecture about violence from Betterfly.

“Did you have to beat her with the fucking umbrella?” Claw says.

Shady shrugs and sends him a smirk. “She slapped your ass and made you uncomfortable. You would have done the same fucking thing if it was me instead.”

“…Fair point.”

“You know Mothra’s gonna give you shit for today, cockroach.” Claw says with a smile as he plays with a loose strand of her hair.

“Yeah,” She answers, “but that’s tomorrow me’s problem.”

And she really believes that, she’s having a really good day today, so lectures and worrying about if solving problems with violence is becoming of a hero can be dealt with on another day.

“You’re in a good mood, Bug-a-babe.” Claw says teasingly. “I almost don’t recognize you without that pouty scowl on your face.”

She playfully punches him as her miraculous beeps again, signaling it’s final warning.

He grins and blinks like he’s realizing something.

“Something’s…different.” He says.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, fleabag.” She answers.

“Your suit.” He slowly brings his fingers down the side of her body and her breath catches. “I don’t know, it just looks…different somehow.”

“Oh? How?”

“Can’t put my finger on it, but it’s fucking distracting.”

She hums and leans in close, pressing her body against his as his gloved claws find their way to her hips.

“Distracting, huh?” She says. “Maybe I should just get the hell out of here then. Wouldn’t want to distract you from all your pretty boy shit.”

“Oh no,” he says, “your spotted ass is stuck with me, cockroach.”

She blinks, taken aback at the familiar words she’s only heard him say once before.

~Flashback~

She flings her yo-yo at a weird pole to fling herself again. Why should she question any of this? So far, she hasn’t found any downsides to this superpowers thing.

Crash!

He pulls his head back as soon as he sees her face, but she’s too mesmerized to really notice.

“What the…” The guy says. “Hey! Get me out of this fucking thing!”

As he rubs where the yo-yo hit him, Marinette finally gets a good look at him.

Hot damn are the only words that come to Marinette’s mind.

She chastises herself, she’s supposed to be wreaking chaos in the name of the Supreme, not ogling some eye candy who’s probably a huge asshole.

“That fucking hurt!” The attractive masked guy says. “What the hell is wrong with you, you psycho watermelon?”

“I’m a fucking ladybug, asshole.” Marinette snaps back.

The guy rolls his pretty purple eyes. “You look more like a cockroach to me.”

“Yeah? Well, you look like a bag of fleas!”

“Hey!”

He grits his teeth and gets in her face.

“Cockroach!” He growls, pushing her.

“Fleabag!” She growls back, pushing him.

“Bug breath!”

“Fuzz face!”

They snarl at each other, and she grabs him by the collar, preparing to threaten or punch him. His snarl falls as he sees a large purple butterfly coming towards them.

“What the fuck is that?” He says.

“That’s an akuma, you dumbass.” She says, still holding him by the collar. “It’s attracted to our anger.”

“Then stop being angry, dammit! We don’t need that fucking thing over here!”

Huh, so he’s not a complete dumbass.

They both take a deep breath to calm down and the akuma flies away.

He clears his throat and picks her yo-yo off the roof, holding it out to her. “Here, your yo-yo thing.”

Her heartbeat picks up a bit as her hand brushes his when she grabs her yo-yo.

Oh no, that needs to stop right there. It’s fine, probably nothing, it’s not like Marinette has to worry about seeing him again, she can completely forget about it and—

“You must be that partner the Supreme is forcing me to work with.” He says. “I’m the cat holder, name’s Claw Noir.”

Fuck. Great, attractive asshole is her stupid partner.

“Damn, do you ever pay attention, cockroach?” Claw Noir says, breaking her from her thoughts. “I asked what I’m supposed to call you?”

“I’m…” She pauses, remembering the Supreme mentioned secret identities, and tries to think of a name for her new super powered persona. “Shady. Yeah, Shadybug.”

“Shadybug? I think cockroach suits you better.”

He eyes her for a moment and something familiar flashes in his eyes, something she recognizes.

Her heart beats a bit faster at the thought, but surely, it’s just from the adrenaline.

…Right?

Well, maybe it isn’t, but if it isn’t then there’s a problem, she can’t let herself fall for an asshole like him, especially if she’s stuck with him. Not when she finally has some power.

Claw Noir looks her up and down again then sighs tiredly. “Great, the Supreme stuck me with a bitchy partner, just great.”

Does he already hate her? What the fuck is his problem? He doesn’t even know her!

So, falling for him won’t be the problem, not killing him however…well, that might be difficult.

She scowls and sends him a deadly glare. She swings her yo-yo and hits him in the stomach with it.

“If I’m so bitchy,” She says, “then give me your Miraculous so I can get a partner that isn’t such a jackass.”

He glares back, not intimidated in the slightest but still not caring if she’s afraid of him. The nerve on him. He growls and extends his staff swinging it at her but she dodges before he manages to hit.

“Oh no,” He says, “your spotted ass is stuck with me, cockroach.”

~End Flashback~

…That was the day they first met forever ago. The day she fell for the guy under all that pain and buried all her want under endless hate. They’ve come so far from that day, so many things had changed, but some things would always be the same. That was the day she fell for the heart under his pain, the day that under all the hate and anger her heart had become his and has always been since.

#miraculous ladybug #fanfic #speechless changes #claw noir #shadybug #sneak peek

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justmywritingstuff · 11 months ago

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Speechless Changes~Number 5

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

AO3

Warnings: language, panic attack

Word Count: 6.9k+

Author's notes: Hi! Sorry this one took a bit longer with work and the holidays and everything, but this part is at least a bit longer to make up for it. It's going to start as a little fun but then it's going to be a very quick tone change. Also a slight look into how I picture some of the other characters in this universe that probably won't really come up in this series. It came out a little choppy, but I really like it--I based some parts of it on something that really happened, so it's a little different. Lots of POV shifts in this one, so remember a line break means a shift in POV! Enjoy!

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Number 5: Alya (first time they find the words for what they are)

Adrien is not off to a great start today. His photoshoot this morning was a complete mess and he no doubt would probably get an earful for his behavior later, nothing new there, but it threw his plans for the rest of the day for a loop.

He’s running late because of the stupid photoshoot and it’s very important to him that he manages to finally befriend Nino as Adrien with a ridiculous movie, if it works, it’s well worth skipping his Chinese lesson today. He’s tried several times already but something always happens, one of the Supreme’s minions starts terrorizing the city to get his and Shady’s attention, he got the address wrong and couldn’t ‘accidentally’ bump into Nino, he did something embarrassing and would rather die than be in public.

Why is this so hard? He’s just trying to coincidentally bump into Nino right when he’s walking home from school at the street by the movie theatre and coincidentally have tickets to see Nino’s favorite movie on the day Nino just so happens to be free because Adrien memorized his schedule…he’s aware how creepy it sounds when he says it like that, but that’s literally his most logical and least fucked up route.

Since he can’t join Nino and Marinette’s school until the next school year, he needs to improvise a way to meet Nino that isn’t ‘oh hey, you should be my fucking friend because a me from another universe told me we’d make great friends and I have shit social skills, so I really want that! Wanna see a movie I know is your favorite with me?’ Yeah, no, that isn’t an option, that’s how he gets sent to a mental institution and never sees his Bug again—even Plagg agreed that was a terrible idea.

He considered for a bit asking if maybe Marinette could find a way to stealthily introduce them to each other, but she’s just as socially inept as he is and is trying to do something similar with Alya—granted she’s made more progress than he has, but still not a great option for this.

Today is the day that it would finally work if he could just get to the right spot in time. His plan is perfect, he’ll literally bump into Nino by ‘accident’ and drop his movie tickets, Nino would pick them up and they would start talking and then he would casually mention that he had an extra ticket and invite Nino and wa-la! Friendship!

At least, that’s what he keeps telling himself as he’s run-walking to the spot he’s supposed to ‘accidentally’ bump into Nino. If his stupid photoshoot hadn’t run late, he would have had time to get there on time and not worry about missing his chance.

He turns the corner, seeing the street he plans to cross to look more casual when running into Nino—cross the street, turn to the right, walk right into Nino’s walking path and into Nino because he’s checking his phone, he’s gone over the plan in his head hundreds of times. He hopes he doesn’t say the wrong thing and embarrass himself, he might die and crawl into a hole if he fucks this up.

He sighs in relief as he sees Nino walking the way he walks every day, distractedly looking at his phone like always. He takes a deep breath and crosses the street putting his plan in motion, this is going to work.

He turns to the right and pulls out his phone and the movie tickets, but right as he does so, a pigeon flies into his face.

He leans back in surprise, trying to get away from it, and loses a bit of balance. His nose starts to itch and he sneezes so hard it hurts, and the momentum from his sneeze propels him forward—falling face first to the ground in the most ungraceful, embarrassing, and ridiculous way he ever could.

He prays to every divine entity in existence that Nino didn’t see that. If he did, he’ll never want to be Adrien’s friend because Adrien is too much of a dumbass. If he’s lucky, Nino will just keep walking because he was too busy on his phone to notice and Adrien will take his idiocy to his grave—Nino never needs to know that it was Adrien.

—

Nino isn’t doing anything today, normally he’d go meet with Betterfly or hang with Alya, but Alya is helping Marinette with something and Betterfly didn’t need him until later, so today is a do-nothing-and-play-videogames-by-himself day. Maybe he should make more friends he can hang out with for days like this?

He got along fine with his classmates, but he didn’t really spend time with any of them outside of school. Neither did Alya, really, they’re both always so busy working together with the resistance that friendships were kind of harder to keep. He hopes that she and Marinette might be good friends, Marinette has always been quiet and kept to herself (which he couldn’t really blame her with everything with Chloe), but she had been a bit more receptive of other people lately and her and Alya could probably get along pretty well. Nino, however, didn’t really have any great options to consider in that department. Nathaneal is completely antisocial, Ivan is too cheery and always with his scary girlfriend, Kim is a jerk who tries to hang with Chloe, and Max is always busy with his robot death matches.

He sighs as he walks home from school about to pass by the movie theatre. He just wants some dude who will chill with him and watch a dumb movie or something every now and then.

He puts his phone away and looks up to see some guy on his phone that looks incredibly familiar walking toward him. Is that…Adrien Agreste? The angry model dude?

Before Nino can be sure of that, a random pigeon comes flying directly towards the guy’s face. The guy leans back like he’s terrified of the thing and then sneezes so hard he’s pushed forward, falling face first into the concrete.

On the one hand, Nino should make sure he isn’t hurt or anything, that should probably be his first thought as someone who fights with the resistance for hope and all that. On the other hand, though, that is the funniest thing he’s ever seen. So, laughing his butt off is what he does first.

“Dude,” Nino says as he closes the distance between them between laughs, “I’m s-sorry. I’m trying really hard not to laugh. Dude, are you…are you okay?”

The guy groans and slowly raises his arm up to give a weak thumbs up, causing Nino to laugh again.

“Here, dude.” Nino says, finally calm enough to speak. “Let me help you up.” He grabs the guy’s arm and helps to pull him up. Now that he’s face to face with the guy, he’s certain it’s the model guy, Alya is gonna have a field day with this when he tells her. “Hey, aren’t you that Adrien Agreste guy?”

Adrien’s face turns a deep red and he nods. He grits his teeth and turns around, sprinting away at full speed.

“Huh.” Nino says to himself, confused at whatever just happened.

He looks back to the ground and notices the guy had dropped something. He kneels down to pick it up and sees that it’s two movie tickets for next week to his favorite movie that Alya refuses to watch with him.

“Weird guy.” Nino says. “Great taste in movies…maybe I can meet him next week to give him back his tickets.”

Nino puts the tickets in his pockets, hoping the guy is okay and will still come to the movie theatre next week so he can give them back to him. Nino did say he’d like someone to see a dumb movie with…maybe this Adrien guy would let him tag along?

—

It was a terrible, horrible day, the worst day that Adrien’s had in a long time. It was the kind of day where one bad thing happened after another, each worse than the last. He lost his temper at a photoshoot that went longer than it was supposed to, he missed one of his lessons, he had badly embarrassed himself in front of Nino when he tried to invite him to the movies, and to top it all off he had to follow his embarrassment with Nino immediately with a long difficult conversation with his father.

Truthfully, the other stuff was bad, but talking to his father is what really pushed him over the edge.

Before the other universe, he would deal with a bad day with incredible violence or screaming matches with Shady, anything he could throw his anger at really. Now though, whenever he has a bad day, all he wants is to spend time with Marinette and just be around her—whether as Adrien or Claw, he didn’t care as long as she’s there. If she’s there with him, then that’s all that matters and he could be okay.

He thought that being contacted by Betterfly at this time at night would mean exactly that, that one of the Supreme’s minions is running rampant and he and Shady could go beat someone up then she would sit with him, and they would talk or kiss for hours and the world would feel less shitty because he was with her. He was excited for some super-powered person to be out and about fucking shit up, he wanted that. Is that a fucked-up thing to want that to happen? Yes. But, that’s his life, he has to find happiness or whatever somewhere. So, that’s what he was hoping for when Betterfly contacted him.

This, however, is not what he wanted after the day he had.

He didn’t want to listen to Betterfly lecture him and only him on all the things he’s trying to be better at. He didn’t want to listen to how much hope can make things better and what a great job he’s doing. He didn’t want to hear this man who is good and kind and cares about everything tell him how much he worries and cares about him and all the things he’s noticed while they fight for a better world. He didn’t want to hear a stranger tell him how he’s doing a great job when his own father just spent all his time ignoring him and tried to lecture him on how he was worried about him making mistakes and hoping that he would change for the better. His own father ignored him and ignored the pain he felt about his mother then had the gall to look him in the eye and tell him that he wanted him to change because of a stupid Chinese lesson.

Before speaking to Betterfly, he would have dealt with everything he was feeling like it was anger. But with the way Betterfly is almost saying the perfect opposite of what his father told him, what he’s feeling is starting to feel more and more like pain.

How could he sit and listen to a stranger that reminds him so much of his father go on about how much he’s improved and changed when his own father had told him how disappointed he was that he hadn’t? That thought in itself is too much, he can’t do it.

“I can’t be here.” Claw growls in the middle of Betterfly’s sentence. He stands from the chair across from Betterfly in the debriefing room.

“I’m sorry.” Betterfly says. “Did I say something insulting? I swear, I didn’t mean—"

“You didn’t.” He answers with clenched fists.

He knows it’s not Betterfly’s fault, he knows it really isn’t and that Betterfly means well. But, he can’t help but think of his father around him and right now he can’t be here because of that. He can’t think of his father right now, he can’t let himself get dragged down that rabbit hole. This isn’t anger, this is him about to fall apart into a shit ton of broken pieces and that can’t happen—not here.

He grits his teeth and walks to the door.

“Is something wrong?” Betterfly asks, sounding genuinely concerned.

He can’t be here, he can’t deal with this now. The longer he stays and listens to Betterfly complimenting him and saying things he wishes his father would say, the harder it is to breathe.

“I can’t be here.” He says again as he steps out the door, barely holding it together.

He doesn’t know where he’s going, but he just needs to leave.

He bumps into someone in the halls of the resistance headquarters as he’s trying to keep his feet from giving out under him, but his vision is starting to blur so he pays no attention to whoever it is. His breathing is picking up and he doesn’t know what this is, but he just can’t focus, he needs to get away to somewhere, away from everyone. Before long he finds himself in a secluded room in the resistance’s headquarters, one that led into the sewers nearby.

His hands shake as he grabs his baton from behind him, he can hardly see what’s in front of him but it’s like his shaking hands are working on their own as they use his baton to call the one person he needs to see more than anything.

“Hey fleabag,” Shady’s voice answers. “What’s—”

“M-M-Marinette?” He barely croaks out.

“Stay where you are.” She responds immediately. “I’m coming.”

He nods, even though he knows she can’t see it, and slides his back down the wall. He hugs his knees to his chest and covers his ears with his hands.

Everything is so loud, even the silence is deafening, and he can feel himself shaking as tears form in his eyes.

He hates it. He hates himself for losing it. He hates that his father’s voice is always in his head. He hates that his father ignores him. He hates that his mother is gone. He hates that he feels so alone and empty sometimes. He hates that this feeling never really goes away.

His chest feels tight and for a moment he’s afraid he’s having a heart attack, or maybe the disease from overusing his powers is coming back. He doesn’t know what’s going on, he just knows that everything feels wrong.

—

Marinette needs to be Shady tonight, she needs an escape from the day she had. It wasn’t the worst of her days, but with Chloe and her parents, it was definitely a long one and she needs some fresh air. She isn’t expecting Adrien to join her as Claw, though she certainly is hoping he might, she just wants to see where the night will take her.

Her yo-yo vibrates and she smiles, seeing Claw’s familiar face on the screen. She’s excited he happened to be out at the same time as her, maybe they could have a relaxing night together just the two of them until sunrise since she hadn’t seen him all day like she desperately wanted.

“Hey fleabag,” Shady says, answering her yo-yo. “What’s—”

She’s interrupted by a barely audible croak on the other end from Claw, “M-M-Marinette?”

“Stay where you are.” She responds immediately. “I’m coming.”

She checks his location on her yo-yo and immediately starts jumping over rooftops and sprinting to get to him faster than she’s ever gone before.

She and her partner aren’t normal when it comes to a lot of things, whatever it is that they are is one of those things that can’t really be explained to anyone else. So, to pretty much the rest of the world, the things that they both did or said weren’t easy to see the meaning of. To her, though, her partner is a puzzle that only she can put together, a book she knows how to read.

One thing that has always—always—been a big part of their ‘more’ situation is that their real names are never said lightly, even if they aren’t in the costumes, they always use one of their hundreds of nicknames for each other. She never questioned it, it’s just one of those things they never really needed to talk about. But the unspoken rule between them has always been that the use of one of their real names meant it’s time to be serious, time to be a bit vulnerable together, time to be honest, or that something is very very wrong. Hearing her partner’s broken voice saying her name like that…she knows that something is wrong and she doesn’t know what, but whatever it is, she knows she has to get to him fast.

She finally yo-yos her way to the resistance’s headquarters and into the secret entrance. She checks his location frantically as she runs down the halls, running past Betterfly, Nino, and some of the other members. She crashes into Alya for a moment, which brings them both to the ground.

“Hey!” Alya says.

Shady doesn’t answer, she’s already getting up and continuing her sprint to find her partner—she’s so close and she’s already taken way too long to find him. She couldn’t stand the thought that something is terribly wrong and he’s all alone.

She turns down several different halls at full speed until she finally finds herself in a secluded room that leads to the sewers where Claw is against the wall, shaking with his head against his knees. She’s never seen him look so broken, so vulnerable.

She sits beside him and pulls his head against her heart, holding him like he might slip away.

He takes a shallow breath and slowly wraps his arms around her, still shaking—he seems like he might be crying, but if he is, she wouldn’t dare comment on it.

She gently pets his hair as his grip tightens. She can feel him sobbing against her chest and every inch of her body is screaming at her to help him, to stay with him forever.

“I’m here.” She whispers. “Stay with me. Breathe.”

She’s never seen him like this before, which, unfortunately means she doesn’t know the right way to help him. She would give anything to take away whatever is wrong, she’d take it all on herself if she could—there isn’t a thing in this universe or any other for that matter that she wouldn’t do for him. She doesn’t know what happened or why, but she hopes the words she tells herself when she falls apart on her worst days are enough to calm him down too, that’s all she can do for him.

“I’m here. Stay with me. Breathe.” She repeats with a slight squeeze to show him it’s true.

His breathing slows down, getting less erratic, and he starts nuzzling into her chest as he seems to calm down.

“I’m here.” Shady says as she pets his hair and kisses his head. “I promise I’m here.”

Shallow breaths against her chest send vibrations through her whole body as she lets him rest in her hold. She couldn’t tell you how long they stay like this, it could be seconds or hours or days, but she doesn’t care—she would stay like that for months or even years if it meant that her partner would be okay.

As Claw’s breathing finally evens out, he hugs her tighter like she isn’t close enough to him. She couldn’t blame him, when she sees him after she breaks down it feels like he’s never close enough…not even when there’s nothing between them but skin.

“I-I’m not fucking crying.” He says into her chest.

“Course you’re not.” Shady answers.

They were taught by the Supreme and everything else in this fucked up world that crying meant weakness, and despite the fact that they both know now that isn’t true in the slightest, it’s hard to unlearn things like that when it feels like the whole world is falling on you. So even though she knows that he is crying, she would never dare contradict him if he says otherwise and God help anyone else that fucking dared to comment on it.

Claw hums and nuzzles into her chest again. He presses his ear to her heart, listening to her heartbeat as she sees him close his eyes.

She takes a deep breath so he can feel her chest rise and fall, so he knows that she’s there with him and he isn’t alone.

“…You haven’t asked.” Claw whispers after a long bit of silence, his eyes still closed as he leans against her.

“Do you want me to ask?” Shady whispers back.

His lip quivers and he tightens his grip on her.

“…No.” He says weakly.

“Then I won’t.” She answers.

She keeps petting his head, trying to give him as much comfort as he needs.

If he wants to tell her, he’ll tell her when he’s ready, if not then she’ll still be there to keep his head out of the water no matter what. The two of them are anger, violence, always have been and maybe always will be. What people often forget she figures, is that also means they’re angry and violent to themselves, so they break harder when they hit the ground. She knows that’s how she’s always been, it’s how she keeps going—she’s so broken that she breaks all at once over everything instead of all the time. People like her and Claw…one small thing could break them into millions of pieces because they spent so much time trying not to be broken. She’s never seen Adrien like this before, so she knows something set him off that broke the dam. Whatever happens or happened, she’s there and would never leave him to deal with it on his own.

They both stay quiet for a long time as she comforts him and he calms down.

“I-I missed a lesson today.” Claw finally says.

“Oh?” Shady answers, letting him speak on his terms and only answering to show him she’s listening intently.

“I get angry a lot…have a nasty reputation for it.”

“Hmm.”

“I cause trouble and chaos sometimes.”

“Yeah?”

“But I’m trying. I’m trying so fucking hard.”

His voice comes out scratchy at the end of his sentence and she leans her head against his.

“I know.” She says, and she did, she knows how hard it is.

“He-he can’t stand me.” He chokes out. “All of that and all he cares about is that I missed a lesson…that I’m going down a bad path and need to be better.”

“Oh.”

“And then Betterfly…he-he’s proud of me and…and…” Claw trails off and squeezes Shady again, clearly fighting fresh tears.

Shady grits her teeth and tightens her grip on him, realizing what set him off.

Betterfly had pulled him into a lecture about how much he improved and was doing good…which in itself, would probably be whatever on a normal day. But he missed a lesson today, which meant that likely sometime today before Betterfly lectured him about the good he is doing, his dickhead father had lectured him about how he needs to change and be better.

How could he not see how hard Adrien is trying? Marinette definitely isn’t the best person for advice with a parent—she couldn’t even bring herself to talk about the issues she has with her own—but when it comes to Gabriel Agreste, she wishes she could just grab him by the shoulders and scream in his face ‘Hey fuck-head, your son is a fucking masterpiece work of art who’s doing his best and you’re an asshole for ignoring him. Stop being a fucking dickhead.’ It broke her heart to know that this man could make her fearless partner crumble so easily and didn’t even think for a second that he was doing it—it’s enough to make her want to cry.

“Maybe he’s right to ignore me.” Claw says. “Maybe I’m not worth knowing.”

Oh, hell no. At that, her heartbreak turns to rage and protectiveness. Shady is not letting her partner think something like that about himself for a single second.

“Hey, listen to me.” She says as she grabs his cheeks to bring his eyes to hers. “You are amazing exactly as you are, if your father doesn’t see that, then fuck him.” She leans her forehead against his. “You are the reason I can see the world getting better, the reason I’ve come this far. You are incredible, and if the rest of the world can’t see it, then screw the whole damn world. You’re trying to be better and you’re making a difference.”

“But I’m a—" He tries but Shady cuts him off with a kiss to his lips.

She pulls back a bit so she can look him in the eyes so he knows how badly she means it.

“What you are is my partner, my best friend…my everything more and inbetween.” Shady says with determination. “You are so important to me, and I love you more than anything, so know that I’m here at your side no matter how shitty things get because I’m with you no matter what.”

He blinks at her, taken aback by her sudden bluntness. He leans back into her chest and pulls her into his lap so she’s straddling his hips, holding her in his arms. It’s something he’s done before, usually when his lips were on hers like they were animals and things were about to get incredibly heated, but this time she knows it’s just because he needs her close—nothing more and nothing less. He moves his head up to her shoulder, resting his face in the crook of her neck like he’s trying to memorize her scent.

“Hmm.” He says into her neck, his voice scratchy from crying. “You always smell like fresh bread…it’s how I know I’m home.”

She hums in response, melting into his arms. They had never said that out loud before, it had always been another unspoken thing between them—for them, home would always be a person and though they don’t know when it became the case, they both know that home is each other.

He’s calmed down enough that now all he wants is to be with her, just have her close to him—it’s the clingy protective side of him that comes out when the lights are low and their voices are silent, the side of him that pulls her closer when they sleep next to each other like he’s afraid he’ll wake up and she’ll be gone, the side that no one but her gets to see.

She moves a hand up to the back of his neck to scratch his head comfortingly and a low purr rumbles from his chest. She smiles, she already knew that he purrs sometimes, but he isn’t always aware that he’s doing it. Normally, she might tease him about it when he stops, but given how he’s feeling today, she decides to let him do anything he pleases without any remarks as long as it helps him.

Claw takes in an uneasy breath and nuzzles his nose into her neck.

“That’s the first time you told me you love me.” He whispers like he might start crying again.

She blinks, suddenly realizing what she had said to him. She didn’t even realize it…it had just slipped out. She could deny it, say she meant something else in case it was a mistake, but then that would be a lie because she meant every word. As frightening as saying her feelings out loud is, when it comes to Claw, she thinks he deserves to hear it—even if he doesn’t say it back.

“Yeah, I guess it is.” She says back.

“Did you…did you mean it?”

“…You know I did, Cat.”

He sighs and she can feel the slight smile he has against her shoulder.

“I love you too, Bug.”

She lets out a sigh she didn’t know she was holding in.

They always had trouble saying how they really feel, they left so much unspoken and were so unsure of themselves that direct communication like this is rare. This isn’t how she pictured this…she always figured they would say something in the heat of battle or when one of them got hurt. She never would have thought it would happen when he had been crying into her chest and it would just slip out as easily as a hello. She’s relieved he said it back, but there’s no fireworks, no dramatic declarations, no big emotional ‘I love you, I love you’s. It simply is and was, as nice as it is to hear it, she didn’t need that and she didn’t think he did either—they both already knew.

They stay like that in silence for a minute, content just to be.

He hums a tune she doesn’t know then pulls back from her shoulder, resting his forehead against hers as her hands move to his chest.

“That’s what we are…you are.” He says, breaking the silence.

“What?” She answers.

“I’ve been trying to put words to what we are, but nothing seems to fit for how much we mean to each other. I call you my partner but…girlfriend, lover, friend…none of those feel right for what we are, but what you called us? That sounds perfect to me.”

“What?”

He looks down and moves one of his hands from her back to her hands, entwining their fingers as they both look at them.

“My everything more and inbetween.” He says as he meets her eyes.

She smiles at him and pulls his hand to her lips, gently kissing his knuckles.

“Yeah…” She says, “I like the sound of that.”

—

“Hey!” Alya growls as Shadybug crashes into her in the Resistance headquarters.

Shady doesn’t answer, she’s already getting up and continuing her sprint to wherever she’s running to so panicked.

Alya huffs in aggravation and quickly gets up, following after her. She can’t be up to anything good to be running like that in their headquarters.

Despite what Nino told her and the fact that he’s suddenly very supportive of Claw Noir and Shadybug being a part of their team, Alya is having a hard time believing that the two former villains could ever be anything but evil. After whatever happened when Nino was alone with them in the debriefing room, he’s been cheering them on and acting like their advocate. He keeps trying to tell her to give them a chance, that they’re just teenagers like them that are trying to be better—though they’ve been helping the Resistance, she hasn’t seen anything to point to them being more than murderous brutes.

She follows Shadybug down several different halls, barely keeping up with her. Shadybug finally stops in a secluded room and Alya stays by the entrance, trying to catch her breath and not let Shadybug know she’s there.

Alya expects to stumble on Shadybug meeting with one of the Supreme’s minions or find her with a beaten hostage or see her dragging a dead body or some other terrible villain thing that would explain why she was running to get here. The last thing she expects to see, however, is Claw Noir against the wall, shaking with his head against his knees. She blinks, not sure if she can trust her eyes, he looks so…broken.

Shady sits beside Claw and pulls his head against her heart, holding him gently like you would hold a kid. He takes a shallow breath and slowly wraps his arms around her, still shaking—he seems like he might be crying.

Alya blinks, confused. Shady wasn’t running to hurt someone or deal with something she did…she was running to Claw. She…she cares about him? How could that be?

Alya thought they hated each other, even with the weird incident with Nino, she couldn’t see them NOT hating each other. Not even two days ago she saw them screaming at each other before Shady had tackled Claw, she left before anything else happened, but she imagined things got very violent. But with the scene in front of her…maybe Nino has a point?

She watches as Shady gently pets Claw’s hair and he sobs against her chest. It seems like a private moment that she shouldn’t be there for, but she’s never seen them look so incredibly…human. She can’t bring herself to look away and poises her ears to listen, the reporter in her needing to know more even though she should probably leave them be.

Claw’s breathing slows down, getting less erratic, and he starts nuzzling into Shady’s chest as he seems to calm down.

Shady says something in a whisper, something Alya tries and fails to hear.

“I’m here.” Shady says as she pets Claw’s hair and kisses his head—at normal volume now, so Alya can actually hear. “I promise I’m here.”

Claw’s breathing finally evens out.

“I-I’m not fucking crying.” He says into Shady’s chest.

“Course you’re not.” Shady answers.

She hears Shady take a deep breath, then more whispering she can’t hear.

“…No.” Claw says weakly, loud enough that she can hear it but soft enough that she has to strain her ears to do so.

“Then I won’t.” Shady answers.

Shady and Claw stay quiet for a long time as she continues comforting him and he calms down.

Alya doesn’t know how long she watches them sit in silence, and frankly, she really should go. This seems like something incredibly private, and even if the two of them are supposed to be these ruthless and crazy villains, this seems like something that comes from pain and Alya can’t help but feel a bit heart broken at the sight of a broken boy who looks like his world is crumbling. She should leave, she really shouldn’t eavesdrop on them in a moment like this, but she can’t bring herself to move from behind the wall she’s watching them from.

“I-I missed a lesson today.” She hears Claw say after awhile.

“Oh?” Shady answers.

“I get angry a lot…have a nasty reputation for it.”

“Hmm.”

“I cause trouble and chaos sometimes.”

“Yeah?”

“But I’m trying. I’m trying so fucking hard.”

His voice comes out scratchy at the end of his sentence and Shady leans her head against his, his scratchy voice pulling at Alya’s heart strings like a kicked puppy.

“I know.”

“He-he can’t stand me.” Claw chokes out. “All of that and all he cares about is that I missed a lesson…that I’m going down a bad path and need to be better.”

“Oh.”

“And then Betterfly…he-he’s proud of me and…and…” Claw trails off, clearly fighting fresh tears.

Alya’s heart breaks a little more at that. What is this poor boy dealing with at home? Is that why he’s so angry all the time? Because of what his civilian life is like?

If Claw is dealing with this kind of thing, maybe Shady is too, maybe that’s why they’re always at each other’s side, because at least they have someone who slightly gets it. Before, Alya tried not to admit it, but Shady does sometimes remind her of Marinette, her new friend. Marinette is a bit socially inept and has a temper, but Alya could tell that she was dealing with something that puts her in a bad place (Alya assumes it’s the pressure of working for her parent’s bakery way more than she should), and she’s been trying really hard lately to come out her shell—like how Shady might be trying to be better, to be good.

She sees Shady grit her teeth. Shady must have a really good idea of what he’s dealing with at home, maybe that’s why she fought so violently sometimes—she’s protective. Actually, thinking about it…all the times Shady got too violent against one of the Supreme’s minions, Claw had gotten hurt or hit. This is dangerous, seeing them like this, seeing them in such a human way. Alya’s already starting to doubt what she knows about them, it’s dangerous to let her guard down so easily.

“Maybe he’s right to ignore me.” Claw says. “Maybe I’m not worth knowing.”

Oh, now that’s messed up. Is he talking about his dad? Before Alya is able to think about that, she sees Shady’s face flash with anger.

“Hey, listen to me.” Shady says as she grabs Claw’s cheeks to bring his eyes to hers. “You are amazing exactly as you are, if your father doesn’t see that, then fuck him.” She leans her forehead against his. “You are the reason I can see the world getting better, the reason I’ve come this far. You are incredible, and if the rest of the world can’t see it, then screw the whole damn world. You’re trying to be better and you’re making a difference.”

That doesn’t sound like something you’d say to someone you hate. That almost sounds sweet enough to be a confession of affection. She’s comforting him and building him up, even if it is a bit intense, she seems so angry that he would talk about himself that way. Maybe she’s starting to genuinely care about him?

“But I’m a—" Claw starts to say but Shady cuts him off with a kiss to his lips.

WAIT. THAT WAS A KISS. Alya just watched the two people who hate each other more than anything KISS. Was Nino right? Are they dating?

Shady pulls back a bit and looks Claw in the eyes.

At that, Alya’s mouth opens completely and she’s gaping at them like a fish, completely speechless as they don’t even really react to the bombshell Shady just said that’s taking a wrecking ball to Alya’s brain.

Claw blinks at Shady and leans back into her chest, pulling her into his lap so she’s straddling his hips, holding her in his arms. He moves his head up to her shoulder, resting his face in the crook of her neck.

“Hmm.” Claw says into her neck, his voice scratchy from crying. “You always smell like fresh bread…it’s how I know I’m home.”

Claw whispers something Alya can’t hear. Not that it really matters, her whole world view is shifting as she witnesses all of this.

Shady hums and says, “Yeah, I guess it is.”

“Did you…” Claw hesitates. “Did you mean it?”

“…You know I did, Cat.”

Claw sighs and says, “I love you too, Bug.”

Alya blinks, finally snapping herself out of it.

Nino was right…they, they’re together. More than that, they’re in love. They aren’t the crazy vicious villains (okay, maybe they are a bit a crazy and vicious, but not as much as Alya thought) that Alya knew them to be. They’re just two people who are messed up because of their lives and who are trying their best. And they love each other, maybe just starting to feel each other in something new and complicated that they don’t understand. Whatever the case—new relationship or not—they genuinely care about each and that in itself meant there’s more to them than just being evil murderous villains.

Claw hums a tune Alya doesn’t know then pulls back from Shady's shoulder, resting his forehead against hers as her hands move to his chest.

“That’s what we are…you are.” Claw says, breaking the silence that had Alya’s mind reeling.

“What?” Shady answers.

“What?”

Claw looks down and moves one of his hands from her back to her hands, entwining their fingers as they both look at them.

“My everything more and inbetween.” Claw says as he meets her eyes.

Oh. Wait. Oh no.

Shady smiles at Claw and pulls his hand to her lips, gently kissing his knuckles.

“Yeah…” Shady says, “I like the sound of that.”

Oh God. Oh no, no, no. She shouldn’t have heard that. They’re not dating, no, that’s not what they are. They’re existing for each other like there’s no one else in the world, like nothing matters without the other.

Alya turns around with a blush on her cheeks, anxiously trying to leave the couple without either of them noticing.

How is Alya supposed to look them in the eye knowing that they’re the most beautiful thing together? She’s in love with them as a couple, freaking ‘everything more and inbetween’. Who says something like that after having a breakdown? How is she supposed to cope with the fact that the two most violent bloodthirsty people she’s ever known make a couple so sweet she wants to cry?

And just like that, Shady and Claw go from being two people Alya could never trust to becoming the two people in a relationship that Alya is determined to protect.

#speechless changes #claw noir #shadybug #miraculous ladybug #fanfic

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justmywritingstuff · 11 months ago

Text

Speechless Changes~Number 4

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

AO3

Warnings: language

Word count: 3.6k+

Author's notes: Okay, so this is more of a fun chapter because the next two are gonna be a bit more...heavy. This chapter is more to show kind of how their relationship isn't just changing with each other but also that they're trying with others too. Also I cut a scene from this chapter, which is why it's a little shorter. I might add it as a bonus chapter at the end of the series, I haven't decided yet. Remember POV changes at the line breaks. Enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Number 4: Nino (first time she sits in his lap)

“You want me to what?” Nino says, completely concerned.

“I need you to stay in there with them.” Alya answers.

“No, no, I heard you the first time. Why the heck would you ask me to do that?”

“Betterfly needs to speak to me, and they got here earlier than usual, so someone needs to watch them.”

“Al, you can’t let me stay in there alone!” Nino says, clearly panicking as he looks into the debriefing room where the two former muscles of the Supreme sit.

Alya is asking him to stay in a room with them all alone, even after the beating they gave him (yes, they’re on the same side now, and yes, he was okay and yes, they had apologized—or at least attempted too—but that isn’t the point).

“It’s just for a little while.” She answers, the way she says it is almost like she’s trying to convince herself as much as him. “Just to keep an eye on them, make sure they don’t try anything.”

“Alya, they’re killers!”

“I know, but they got here early for once and we can’t leave them alone, who knows what they might do. Betterfly needs me, it’s important, and he swears they won’t hurt you and I…I trust him.”

Nino trusts him too, and he trusts Alya with every inch of his being. He doesn’t, however, trust the two evil people sitting in their debriefing room. If they wouldn’t hurt him, he’d have to stop them from destroying the debriefing room when they inevitably start trying to kill each other. No, thank you.

“Alya, I can’t be in there!” He whisper-shouts. “Even if they don’t plan to hurt me, they’re crazy! Sure, they might not mean to kill me, but they hate each other so much that they’ll kill each other, and I’ll be collateral damage!”

“I wouldn’t let you in there if I thought you were in danger.” Alya tries again then turns her attention to the two former villains in the room. “Let them kill each other, then, just stay away. Please?”

She turns back to Nino and smiles sweetly at him, the smile that’s only reserved for him. Nino is weak for that smile and Alya knows it, he would do almost anything she asks when she smiles like that—and he’s a lovestruck idiot, because man, did she take advantage of it.

Nino sighs, giving in to his girlfriend’s wishes despite his better judgement.

“…Fine, but only for a little bit. Don’t let me die in there.”

“I would never.”

—

Sitting in the debriefing room in the Betterfly hideout is so boring, especially when they have to wait. Shady couldn’t help but think of how inconvenient it is to be here this early in the morning and from how tired Claw looks in the chair next to her, she’s guessing he’s annoyed too. Sure, they both happened to come in early today and she would never admit it outloud, but it’s because she was excited to see him, but damn it’s feeling like such a big mistake with how boring this is.

Shady’s eyes go across the table to see Nino doing something on his phone, warily darting his eyes to them every now and then.

She’s a bit indifferent to Nino, sure they went to school together, but she didn’t really speak to him—she didn’t really speak to anyone until she got back from the other dimension, for that matter, but she’s trying to be more open to new people. If she actually finally manages to become Alya’s friend at some point, then maybe she would talk more to Nino. Right now their interactions had been brief and a bit awkward when she’s Marinette and nothing but tense as Shady. Her friendship or whatever with Nino, however, isn’t important to her right now. What is important in her mind is what’s the point of being here early if no one is here but Nino? It’s just a huge waste of time.

Shady sighs and her gaze travels back to Claw, desperate for something to entertain her. Sure, they have something going on and she cares for him very deeply, but she’s incredibly bored, and the idea of arguing with or beating up Claw is starting to sound really enticing.

He looks so tired, sure it’s early, but Shady has noticed that he seems more tired lately. She wonders if like her it’s because of the nights he slept in her bed before her parents returned. She’s been having trouble sleeping since, she has never slept better than when she sleeps with him. Everything is always too loud when he’s not there—her thoughts, her fears, her room—everything just feels too much. But when he’s there next to her sleeping peacefully with an arm wrapped around her (even if he does snore sometimes, okay a lot of the time), everything is quiet and calm and safe. She needs him beside because when he’s there with her, she feels like for once in her life she could actually be okay. That’s why she feels like she can’t sleep without him, it feels wrong.

And truthfully, she has no idea when it will happen again, which made sleep even more precious since she isn’t getting much of it. Her parents are back, and she would never have him in her house while they were home—not if she could help it. With his feelings toward his father and all those security cameras, she didn’t dare try to sneak in unless he knew she was coming.

Claw yawns and rubs his eyes, and Shady suddenly finds herself hyper focused on them. Damn, those eyes of his that she is lucky enough to see both in and out of the suit, she could look at them all day. She blinks, realizing they look a little different today. She couldn’t put her finger on it, almost like something is missing…wait.

Shady leans in closer to Claw, scrutinizing him. Claw leans back, confused.

“What?” He asks, definitely a little cranky from lack of sleep.

“Holy shit!” Shady answers incredulously, as she realizes what’s missing. “You’re not wearing makeup!”

"Remember, cockroach?" Claw answers with a sigh. "Don't have that lame ass disease anymore."

Shady shakes her head, a small—kinda formerly evil—smile spreads across her face. “No, no, you’re not wearing ANY makeup, fleabag, there’s nothing on your eyes. You look like such a prep.”

“Hey, I do not! Take that back!”

“No way. You’re a total prep.”

“I didn’t have time to put on my eyeliner, okay! So, shut up, cockroach!”

Shady blinks at him, confused. She always put on makeup first thing in the morning and she’s always meticulous about it. It was always good to go when she transformed, why on earth wouldn’t his be?

“Wait…” Shady says, piecing it together, “you put on your makeup AFTER you transform? Why the hell would you do that?”

“Excuse the fuck out of me for trying to have some authenticity.” Claw answers.

Shady cocks her head to the side thoughtfully as a genuine smile spreads across her face. Of course, he would pull some dumb shit like that—if anyone would be that bitch, it would be him.

“Oh my god,” Shady says, “give me your makeup.”

“What?” Claw asks, immediately holding onto the pocket his makeup is waiting in.

“Give me your fucking makeup, I wanna see it.”

Shady reaches for the pocket to take it out, Claw lets her but is entirely confused. She pulls out his eyeliner and eyeshadow from his pocket and examines it. It doesn’t surprise Shady in the slightest that his makeup is from a very high-end brand.

“Fuck, this is the expensive shit, no wonder your eyeliner is always better than mine, asshole.” She sends him a menacing glare, though she knows that Claw knows her well enough at this point to know that this is her being playful.

Claw cocks his head to the side and raises a teasing eyebrow at her. God damn, how is this asshole so good looking even when he’s too tired to even fucking put on makeup?

Shady’s glare falls and she hums thoughtfully as she puts the makeup on the table in front of them. She stretches tiredly and stands up, the whole time Claw eying her curiously. She plops down into Claw’s lap, so she’s face to face with him, surprising everyone else in the room.

“Here,” Shady says, “I’ll do it for you.”

—

Nino’s on edge to say the least. He’s trying to keep himself distracted with his phone so he wouldn’t think about where he is and who he’s with, but he didn’t dare take his eyes off Shadybug and Claw Noir for too long. For once, they’re quiet, probably even tired from the looks of it, but that didn’t dissuade Nino.

As he looks at Shadybug without all the screaming or yelling, Nino can’t help but to think that when she’s somewhat calm, she sometimes looks awfully familiar. He tries to push those thoughts away, the last thing he needs is nightmares about knowing Shadybug anywhere outside the costume. He tries not to think of her like that, he can’t let himself think of her like she’s a normal person, she’s a killer.

Shadybug glances at Nino and he tries his best to hide that he’s looking at her, praying to God she doesn’t notice. Thankfully, she doesn’t, and turns her attention back to Claw Noir. Claw Noir yawns, and honestly, Nino is having a really hard time not thinking about the fact that such a crazy vicious guy yawns like an adorable kitten. Claw is a killer too, Nino doesn’t want to think of either of them in a capacity different than that—that’s how they would trick him to kill him.

Nino notices Shadybug leaning towards Claw Noir, scrutinizing him, probably thinking of ways to maim him if Nino had to guess.

“What?” Claw Noir says.

“Holy shit!” Shadybug answers. “You’re not wearing makeup!”

“Remember, cockroach?” Claw says with a sigh. “Don’t have that lame ass disease anymore.”

Nino watches Shadybug shake her head, that evil smile of hers across her face.

“No, no, you’re not wearing ANY makeup, fleabag, there’s nothing on your eyes. You look like such a prep.”

Nino takes in a breath, preparing himself for where this would inevitably take them. This is it; this is how they’ll kill each other and HIM in the process.

“Hey, I do not!” Claw Noir growls. “Take that back!”

“No way. You’re a total prep.”

“I didn’t have time to put on my makeup, okay! So, shut up, cockroach!”

“Wait…you put on your makeup AFTER you transform? Why the hell would you do that?”

“Excuse the fuck out of me for trying to have some authenticity.”

Nino watches Shadybug cock her head to the side, and sees a different smile spread across her face, this one is oddly more…nice. What is this?

“Oh my god,” Shady says, “give me your makeup.”

“What?”

“Give me your fucking makeup, I wanna see it.”

Nino, getting a little confused and curious at the fact that they haven’t started screaming or hitting each other yet, watches as Shadybug pulls out Claw Noir’s eyeliner and eyeshadow from his pocket and examines it.

“Fuck, this is the expensive shit, no wonder your eyeliner is better than mine, asshole.”

Shadybug sends Claw Noir a menacing glare and Nino prepares himself to hide under the table when Claw Noir explodes at her or says an insult to make Shadybug throw a chair. But instead, Nino sees Claw Noir send Shadybug a raised eyebrow, one that just seems…playful? What the hell?

The glare falls from Shadybug’s face without any violence or insult, and she hums as she puts the makeup on the table in front of them. Nino has never been more confused, what is this? Since when did Shadybug hum and since when are they not killing each other?

Shadybug stretches and stands up then plops down into Claw Noir’s lap, face to face with him. What. The. Actual. Fuck. Is. Happening? Shadybug is sitting in Claw Noir’s lap? And they’re not trying to kill each other? And he’s not PISSED about it?

Nino blinks, thinking he must be hallucinating. These are the two most violent and bloodthirsty people he’s ever seen—especially when it came to each other. Nino can’t understand how the two of them who literally just yesterday he saw slamming each other against a wall while screaming incredibly graphic threats could be in front of him looking so…like this.

“Here,” Shadybug says, “I’ll do it for you.”

Claw Noir hums peacefully and closes his eyes as Shadybug grabs the makeup to put on him.

Nino watches them suspiciously, it must be some kind of trick, they have to be lulling each other into a false sense of security or lulling HIM into a false sense of security. That’s all it could possibly be, if it isn’t that, then it’s a moment of pure unquestioning trust—and that could never happen between the two most evil and terrible people in the world. Nino has to watch them, he couldn’t take his eyes off them, he HAD to understand what’s happening in front of him.

Shadybug starts applying his makeup, a comfortable—albeit concerning—silence between them. She expertly swipes eye shadow across Claw Noir’s eyes, her tongue slightly sticking out in a way Nino thought might be funny if it was literally anyone else. Once Shadybug finishes his eye shadow, Claw Noir peeks an eye open with a grin causing her to pause. He sticks his own tongue out at her playfully—no other word could possibly describe it, Nino is sure of it—and Shadybug snorts amusedly. Claw Noir immediately starts laughing and Shadybug starts laughing too, clear, distinct, and genuine.

Nino drops his phone and gapes at them like a fish out of water, no words, no sounds, as the most violent, bloodthirsty, terrible people in the world sit in front of him laughing—and not cackling or evil laughter, oh no, pure joyful laughter, the kind you only share with the people you care about most, the kind Nino himself only really shared with his family and Alya.

And even more than that, Nino likes their laughs, they’re melodious and sweet and genuine and honestly felt contagious, which he can’t for the life of him understand. He feels the need to laugh with them and that horrifies him. It frightens him that he’s starting to see them not as villains or monsters, but as something just so…childlike. Maybe that’s all they really were from the beginning, maybe they were just kids that were manipulated into doing terrible things by someone they believed was looking out for them. Maybe they were just teenagers like himself and Alya that made mistakes and are legitimately trying to be better. Maybe he had misjudged them and put them into the wrong “evil” box. Maybe…maybe he didn’t need to be afraid of them.

Nino clears his throat to get their attention, and the laughing immediately stops like they remember where they are. They look at him skeptically, like they aren’t sure how to react to someone else seeing them in such a private moment.

Nino sends them an awkward smile and stands up, gathering every bit of courage he has.

“C-can I see, dudes?” Nino says as he fiddles with his fingers.

“Okay,” Claw answers, still watching him suspiciously. “Sure.”

Neither of them move as Nino walks toward them, he knows it’s only a moment or so, but it feels like an eternity. He bends down to take a look at Claw’s makeup and Shady’s grip on Claw tightens on him protectively from her spot on his lap.

Shady is protective of Claw…Claw trusts her…they actually genuinely care about each other. Nino isn’t sure of many things, but he’s sure right in this moment that there really is more to these two former villains than violence and anger, that he’s right about there being more to them. Oddly enough, that thought doesn’t scare him anymore.

Nino smiles again, trying to steel his nerves as he looks at Claw’s makeup. If they are trying to be better, he should at least give them a chance to try.

“It looks good, dude.” Nino says, giving a thumbs up.

“Thanks.” They both say at the same time before looking at each other.

Shady sends Claw a look like they’re having a psychic conversation (which as far Nino knows, they could be, who knows what their magic jewelry could do). Claw winks and grins.

“Can’t help that I’m prettier than you, cockroach.” Claw says.

“Oh please, fleabag.” Shady answers with a roll of her eyes. “You just have nicer shit to cover that stupid face of yours.”

“Sure, keep telling yourself that, bug breath.”

“Oh, screw you!” Shady punches his shoulder and the two of them laugh for a second. “Shut up and close your fucking eyes so I can finish.”

Nino watches the two of them. It suddenly dawns on him that the two of them are actually…friends. They’re just socially awkward and don’t know how to talk to people—even each other—that’s why they’re always insulting or fighting each other, that’s how they show that they care. It’s kind of sweet in a super twisted way. That explains why despite the threats and insults they’re always at each other’s side like they can talk to each other without words.

“You dudes are actually…” Nino says, getting their attention. “You’re really calm today.”

“So?” Shady answers, not taking her eyes off Claw as she works on his eyeliner.

“So…” Nino answers, hesitating to let his thoughts come out loud. “You’re just usually…not. It’s just that usually you dudes are a bit violent and uh…explosive?”

Claw snorts amusedly, careful not to move as Shady works on his eyeliner. “Don’t get used to it. This is just us both being too fucking tired to scream at each other and too fucking bored to fight. Isn’t that right, bug butt?”

Claw gives Shady a small pinch in the side and she yelps in surprise. Is Shady…ticklish?

Shady glares at him and pulls him by the bell, his eyes still closed. “Oh yeah, fur face. I’m throwing your dumbass against a wall as soon as this stupid debriefing thing we’re here for is over.”

Claw grins and bites at her, but Shady pushes him away.

“It’s kind of nice,” Nino says, getting their attention again. “You dudes not attacking each other, I mean.”

Shady hums in response and moves Claw’s head from side to side to admire her work. She lets go and pulls herself off his lap as Claw’s eyes open. She plops back into her chair.

“There,” Shady says. “Now you don’t look like a fucking prep.”

“Thanks, cockroach.” Claw answers.

“And now I’m bored as hell again.” Shady says with a sigh.

“Can I see?” Nino asks. It’s not a great conversation, but no one’s trying to fight him or with each other, so Nino is counting it as a little bit of bonding—maybe not friendship or trust yet, but it’s a start he supposes.

He leans over again to get a better look at Claw’s makeup as Claw looks at him. “Damn, dude. You wear eyeliner well. I could never pull that off.”

Claw and Shady slowly look at each other, another silent conversation between them. They both slowly grin, and Nino tries to think differently, but their grins are very much evil and he doesn’t think that’s a good sign. At the same time…there’s something playful about their smiles that Nino thinks means he’ll be okay.

Nino swallows hard, knowing he’s about to ask something he really shouldn’t. “…Why are you guys looking at me like that?”

—

Alya’s talk with Betterfly is going longer than she thought it would. Which, on a normal day, would be fine. But she’s on edge with Nino alone in a room with those two monsters, who knows what they would do? Sure, they fought with the rebellion now, but that didn’t change who they were before or what they are capable of. She never should have asked Nino to watch them. Betterfly is lecturing again, something about hope and a better future that they’ve talked about hundreds of times—Betterfly is a good man and Alya trusts him completely, but he tends to talk much more than he really needs too, which is fine, but today it’s making her anxious.

Alya secretly pulls her phone into her lap like she would at school during a boring lecture and shoots Nino a text. It can’t hurt to check on him, right?

Alya: Heyyy r u ok? Is anything wrong????

Nino responds almost immediately, so Alya calms down just a little. That is, until she sees what he sent back.

Nino: *thumbs up emoji*

*pic of Nino putting his chin in his hands while wearing black eye makeup*

*pic of Claw and Nino, both clearly with matching makeup*

*pic of Claw wearing Nino’s hat, Shady wearing Nino’s glasses while rolling her eyes, and Nino between them with a huge smile on his face*

Nino: Dudes got bored soooo now I’m pretty :DD

Alya blinks thinking she’s hallucinating. There’s no way those pictures can be real. Shadybug and Claw Noir are monsters and…and they wouldn’t do something like that! …Would they? No, they hated each other too much to take a picture together, Nino must be messing with her that’s all.

Her phone vibrates again as another message from Nino is sent to her phone.

Nino:

*zoomed in picture close to their faces where Claw has a very obvious lipstick mark on his cheek that’s the exact same color as Shady’s and Shady is holding him close to her by the bell.*

WAIT OH MY GOD

I THINK THEY R DATING

Her phone completely falls from her hands in surprise and hits the ground, getting Betterfly’s attention.

What the hell is happening in the debriefing room?

#miraculous ladybug #shadybug #claw noir #speechless changes #fanfic

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justmywritingstuff · 11 months ago

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Hello! Announcement!

I know you guys were hoping for an update, but the next chapter isn't done yet (very soon, I promise.) BUT I did get a request for the story to be posted elsewhere and have been working on setting up an archiveofourown. I finished setting it up and will make sure I also post chapters on there so it's easier to read. Here's the AO3 link to Speechless Changes for everyone interested and if the link is being weird, I used the same username as my tumblr so it's easy to find, so you can either use the link or go to AO3 and search "justmywritingstuff" under people.

#speechless changes #ao3 link

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justmywritingstuff · 11 months ago

Note

Quick question(s). Are you a collective of writer or just one person? Do you have (by the way you write you most certainly have one) a fanfiction.net archiveofourown or wattpad account where I can link this fic?

Tumblr is a very useless platform to publish fics and I would love others to read this amazing fic.

Just bothering you. I hope this doesn't stop you from writing chapter 4. Because this is amazing!!!

Hi beatrice1979a! First of all, I just wanted to say that I adore you, you're wonderful--it really makes me want to write even more when I see that someone is actually interested in it, so thank you! Second, I've been crazy busy this week and haven't been online, so I'm sorry it took so long to reply.

To answer your questions: I am only one person, which is why I post a bit randomly since you know, life stuff can make it difficult sometimes. I actually don't have an account as of yet, but I am getting an archiveofourown account set up soon and I will happily post it as soon as it's up and will link this story to my account.

If you have any other questions about anything, feel free to ask and I'll answer as soon as I can. And again, thank you so much for reading my work! It makes me so happy to see someone enjoying it!

#justmywritingthings #asks #speechless changes

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justmywritingstuff · 1 year ago

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Speechless Changes~Number 3

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

Warnings: language

Word Count: 4.1k+

Author's notes: Hello again! Here's the next part, it's a little choppy in places, but it still turned out pretty good I think. I had the week off of work this week and this one kind of just flowed out of me, so I finished this one pretty fast. Look out for the next chapter soon, I already started on it and I'm really excited for it. Remember, line break means a change in POV. Enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Number 3: Claw Noir and Marinette (first time in her room)

“The Supreme sends his regards, traitors.” Monkey something—Shady couldn’t remember—says as he shoots at them with his powers.

Shady and Claw both dodge his attack the best that they can.

Shady has to actively remind herself that they actually have to try not to cause damage anymore, but this Monkey guy is an annoying asshole and she’s tempted to turn back into a villain just so she can beat the shit out of him. From the annoyed scowl on Claw’s face, she can tell he’s considering the same thing.

This is the new norm now, fighting against the Supreme meant also fighting against his minions, and Shady hated it. It certainly didn’t help that Betterfly and the rest of the rebellion always seem to be busy with something else when this happens or that Shady and Claw are too proud to ask for help so they didn’t always tell the others. That’s not anyone’s fault, she reminds herself, the rebellion still didn’t trust her and Claw fully and they’re working on the other part. That’s not the point, though, the point is that this Monkey guy has got to go.

Monkey-whatever shoots his powers at Shadybug and she dodges again and again until she ends up stuck in a corner, nowhere else to go. Shady realizes she’s probably trapped and tries to think of something—anything—to get herself out of it. Claw is running as fast as he can but he’s too far away to reach them before she gets hit. This is about to be a mess because it’s Shady’s life, so of course it has to be.

Monkey-whatever grins and instead of shooting his powers at a cornered Shady, whips around and hits a running Claw square in the chest, knocking him backwards onto his back—probably unconscious.

Now Shady is aware that as a ‘good guy’ she’s supposed to fight in a way that doesn’t cause as much pain, she's not always happy about it, but she's aware of it. BUT Shady also isn’t very in touch with her emotions besides one. The only one of her emotions she feels more than anything but tries her hardest to keep in check: her anger. And usually, she has no issues with doing so and can calm herself down when she needs to.

However, whenever it comes to Claw, her brain stops functioning normally.

Seeing Claw on the ground, probably unconscious, at the fault of someone standing right in front of her who did it intentionally…well, she sees red.

---

Claw, who wasn’t unconscious but only incredibly dazed, got up to a sight he really couldn’t explain and he immediately tries to step in. He couldn’t tell you how Shady took down the monkey guy. And frankly even though he thinks Shady is incredibly hot when she’s angry—with the way the guy looks like he was hit by a truck, is hanging upside down like a pinata, and is literally begging through tears to let him go and swearing they’ll never see him again as Claw grabs a screaming and yelling Shady—he doesn’t think he wants to know.

He doesn’t ask any questions as they finish dealing with Monkey-something, and Shady doesn’t say anything either—but she’s still seething. They take away the crown on Monkey’s head and he transforms back into his normal self. Shady puts it into her yo-yo, sending it to Betterfly or wherever it goes, then uses her miraculous cure to set everything back to normal. Claw seems to straighten up a bit, the cure making him feel a bit better.

Shady glares at him and grabs his hand. She drags him into an alleyway away from onlookers and takes a few extra turns to make sure they aren’t followed. He knows how Shady gets, so he doesn’t fight her, but he mentally prepares for a screaming match of everything he did wrong in the fight—likely leading to makeout session, their new norm. Once she’s sure that they’re away from prying eyes, she whips around to talk to him, her face barely visible under the light of a streetlamp.

“You dumbass!” She growls. “You fucking idiot! He could have killed you! What if something happened to you, huh?”

Oh. This isn’t their norm, this is…she’s…she’s worried about him?

Claw blinks, surprised.

Shady actually…genuinely cares enough to scream at him for being reckless. He didn’t know what to do with that information. Since his mother he was always screaming for attention—for someone to see him—but everyone only saw the ridiculous model his father would do anything to ignore. Everyone he cares about just ignores him, his pain, his behavior, his anger, everything. Everyone except…her.

The realization of that, makes Claw realize that she’s worried about him because he could have died—which means she isn’t angry at all, she’s upset, and Claw couldn't bear to see her upset.

“I’m fine.” Claw says, trying his best to reassure her and clearly failing at it.

“Oh, you’re fine, you fucking moron?” Shady snarls back. “Listen here, you little shit—” Shady jabs him in the ribs and he groans in pain. He didn’t realize how much his ribs are still hurting, usually the miraculous ladybugs take care of that sort of thing.

She frowns and gently places a hand on his side, checking his injuries, the anger on her face replaced with genuine concern—if they were in different circumstances, Claw would have liked to get a picture to have proof for himself that she’s genuinely concerned for him.

“Are you okay?” Shady asks tentatively.

“I’m fine.” Claw answers again.

Shady glares at him menacingly.

“If you say ‘I’m fine’ one more time,” she threatens, “I’m ripping your ring off and breaking your finger.”

Claw holds up his hands in surrender, groaning in discomfort at the motion, and Shady’s expression softens back to worry.

“Adrien?” She tries again, a gentleness in her voice that only comes out in moments like this.

Claw is weak for this side of her, the side that she hides from the rest of the world.

He sighs and leans his forehead against hers so he can look her in the eyes and she knows he honestly means it. “I’m just sore, Marinette. I’ll be okay, just need to rest a bit.”

“Okay, then let’s get you home, just in case, fleabag.”

Claw grins as he pulls back. “Aww, are you worried about me, cockroach?”

“Shut it, fur face.” Shady says, not an ounce of actual malice in her voice. “Blots off.” She detransforms.

“Daggers in.” Claw waits for the light of his detransformation, but it doesn’t come. “Daggers in.” He tries again, but still nothing.

“What’s wrong?”

“I…I can’t transform back for some reason.”

“What?”

“It must be the monkey guy when he hit me, it must have fucked up my powers.”

“Hold on.”

Marinette grabs Claw’s staff, he’s used to her grabbing his stuff, so he doesn’t question it in the slightest. She quickly calls Betterfly.

“Hello?” He answers.

“What do you know about the monkey guy?” Shady asks, not wasting any time.

“I’ve fought him once before,” Betterfly answers, “he’s very difficult to—oh no! Are you two battling him right now? We’ll send reinforcements right away, don’t wor—”

“Calm down, Mothra, we took care of it. I sent the stupid crown thing through my yo-yo.”

“Oh… uh, alright. Well done.”

“Fur face got hit and can’t change back.”

“Oh! Oh dear! That’s dreadful to hear!”

Claw rolls his eyes, Betterfly is always so concerned and nice about everything. He knows that he’s a ‘good guy’ and that it’s probably just how he is, but it just reminds Claw of the fake smile his father always seems to wear—the one that he wears like what happened to his mother never happened. He tries not to focus on that, it’s not Betterfly’s fault that he reminds Claw of his father sometimes.

“Well,” Betterfly continues, “as long as he’s not badly injured, it should wear off within an hour or so. He’ll transform back soon, no need to worry.”

“Great.” Shady hangs up and turns back to Claw. “Okay, so there, you’ll transform back soon.”

Claw nods awkwardly, relieved he won’t be stuck forever.

Marinette scrutinizes him like she’s thinking hard about something, Claw thinks he can almost hear the gears turning in her head. Her thinking face is so cute.

“…Your father has no idea you’re Claw Noir, does he?” Marinette says after a moment.

Claws eyes widen, completely taken aback at the abruptness of the question.

“What?” He says.

“Does your father know you’re Claw Noir?” Marinette answers, more pointedly this time.

Claw hesitates, not sure why she’s asking this all of a sudden. He’s mentioned his father a few times and they had sort of talked about his issues with his father…but she usually didn’t bring him up like this.

“…No.” He answers slowly.

“You need to rest.” Marinette says, though she says it more like an observation than anything else. “You can’t go home.”

“Wait, why the hell not?”

“Because you can’t turn back and being Claw for an hour or so? All the security cameras are bound to notice.”

Claw feels like an idiot, all his time as Claw Noir and he’s never once thought about the security cameras around his house. The fact that his father hadn’t already found out he’s Claw Noir is a miracle…or rather, proof that he really did ignore everything about his son. Claw tries to push that thought out of his mind for the moment, he could come back to it next time there was something for him to punch.

“…Oh.” Claw says, hoping Shady didn’t notice that he’s never realized the security cameras before. “Right.”

Marinette bites her lip in thought. “…Do you have anywhere else you can go?”

He didn’t have anyone; he didn’t even have people to talk to besides Marinette. He had tried to make some friends, maybe get to know Nino, but you know…he used to be evil, so that obviously hasn’t worked out yet. He didn’t have anyone he could count on besides her. He has a weird cousin in London that he could call if he needed to hide a body or something, but that probably isn’t helpful.

“…No.” Claw says, hoping it doesn’t sound as sad as the situation actually kind of is.

Marinette nods and swallows hard like she’s preparing for something. “…You can come to my place.”

Claw shakes his head, even more taken aback. Shady never let him go to her place, never talked about her home, and always changed the subject or got angry whenever it’s brought up. He understood that and always tried a little harder not to bring it up, he respected that for some reason it’s a touchy subject for her and he didn’t want her to be uncomfortable. The fact that she would bring it up, is strange as hell.

“Wait, really?” Claw asks, thinking maybe he misheard her.

“Yeah,” she answers carefully, “just for a little while.”

“What about your uh your parents? Won’t they notice?”

Shady hesitates, suddenly avoiding Claw’s eyes. “…They’re away at my uncle’s for awhile.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

“…Okay.”

Claw pulls her into his arms and she holds onto his neck as he holds her tightly. He extends his staff to launch them into the air, sending them through the clouds and into the night sky. He pauses as he starts to see some of the stars lighting up Marinette’s face, smiling at the only person that could ever understand the rush he feels in that moment.

She looks at the stars for a moment, the joy on her face matching his, then down at where Claw is ever so carefully holding his staff. She snaps her eyes back up to Claw realizing what he was about to do.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Marinette playfully threatens.

Claw grins mischievously and winks at her. He pulls on his staff and lets gravity take them, falling straight towards Marinette’s place as the wind whips in their faces. Despite the force of their fall, he lands on Marinette’s balcony perfectly gently.

She rolls her eyes and kisses his cheek. She likes to pretend she hates it when he does crazy things like that—but he knows she loves it just as much as he does, if not more.

He places Marinette on the ground and puts away his staff. He follows Marinette through the trap door by her bed, grunting slightly at the effort of everything as he’s reminded of his sore ribs.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Marinette asks, watching him warily.

Claw stretches and starts to look around the room, taking a few steps from the bed and inspecting everything out of curiosity. He had always wondered what his baker girl’s room looked like. He always pictured it was full of posters and flower details like the ones on her jacket she made, maybe fabric or drawings or creative projects in progress everywhere. He always pictured her room to be covered in all her creative interests, probably a bit cluttered and messy, but he always pictured her room would just look like it was hers. Looking at her room now, where everything is perfectly clean and put together, everything seems so…bare.

“I’m fine,” He says. “Just tired.”

“You need to tell me if something’s wrong, fleabag.” She counters. “I can’t do anything if you don’t.”

Claw looks around the room, for someone so full of life and intensity, her room…her home…it all seems so empty. No color, no mess, no decorations, barely any furniture, and not a personal thing in sight. It just seems so…not her.

---

As Claw grunts in discomfort, Marinette is reminded of the fact that things today could have gone very bad very quickly if just one thing had been different.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” She asks carefully.

Today she was faced with the very real possibility of something happening to the only person that made the world suck a little less, and that worried her more than anything else they had dealt with.

Claw starts looking around Marinette’s room and takes a few steps from Marinette’s bed, taking much longer than she would like for him to answer.

“I’m fine,” Claw says. “Just tired.”

He doesn’t seem fine, Marinette notes.

“You need to tell me if something’s wrong, fleabag.” Marinette says, worriedly watching Claw move his eyes around her room. “I can’t do anything if you don’t.”

Claw sighs sadly, his eyes going over her walls like he’s seeing an alien planet for the first time.

“You know the same applies to you, right?” Claw says.

Marinette’s heartbeat picks up. Did he think she’s upset with him? Is that what's wrong?

“What?” She says.

“If there’s ever something wrong…” He hesitates as his eyes dart around the room. “You can talk to me.”

Claw meets Marinette’s eyes and she catches his hidden meaning. He thought something was wrong because her room is so empty, which she couldn’t blame him, she hates her room…she hates everything about this place.

Marinette turns her gaze towards her desk, unable to meet his eyes. She considers telling him the truth, she wants to tell him the truth, but she knows that she can’t. There are things she could never tell him…things she couldn’t even really tell herself.

Claw hums regrettably behind her. “I’m sorry, I-I should go.”

Marinette turns toward him quickly, surprising him and making him stumble. He starts to fall and she tries to grab him but ends up tumbling with him. Claw protectively grabs onto her as they fall onto her bed, him landing on top of her.

They blink and both start laughing. Marinette stops laughing to look at him, really look at him.

The way his eyes shine when he laughs, the carefulness that he holds her with, everything about a mere moment that made it something she will always remember. She feels so encompassed by it all that something like this…something so…good could be hers. She’s terrified that she could trust Claw this much, with this much vulnerability. Their relationship had started as a convenient alliance and turned into one of hatred and then one of…whatever they had become that night on the roof.

This is the most vulnerable Marinette has ever been around anyone. Right there on this day and that moment, Claw has all the parts of her she tries to keep hidden on display for him. Her anger, her violence, her fear, her weakness, everything she couldn’t let anyone see. He’s here in her room with the truest part of her, the part of her that’s quiet and unsure and just wants someone to stay with her…to not leave.

This is new, everything before this moment was violence, tension, or convenience. Even their ‘more’ situation was always just kisses to shut the other up, giving in to the tension, or simply…to kiss. But it had never gone past that. Marinette didn’t even know it could go past that…that Claw might want something past that with her of all people. The two of them used to hate each other with every fiber of their beings, even if things had shifted, how could he ever see past all of the hate she gave him?

Marinette is different when it came to that, she always knew there was a thin line between hate and desire. In fact, her hate was so strong because it originally stemmed from want. But, Claw had hated her from the moment he first saw her, and that made her bury any wants with hate so she could convince herself that it wasn’t there. And, it worked, she was convinced that her strong feelings toward Claw had been nothing more than hate until that night on the rooftop when everything clicked into place.

The truth is, as she sits there looking at him laugh, there’s a million things she wants to tell him. She wants him to stay with her, she wants a life, a friendship, whatever it is that was taken from them because of their own hate. She wants him to know that she has never hated him and never would, though she certainly tried. How could she tell him that she was always his and he just didn’t know it? That the last thing she wants is for him to leave her, now or ever?

If you’re Marinette, then you don’t. At least not with words.

---

Claw laughs at the situation, leave it to him to accidentally tackle a girl when he’s trying to be serious. It’s the first time he’s laughed so genuinely in awhile, it feels…good.

In the midst of his laughing, Marinette stops laughing and looks at him. Something different in her eyes, something he’s never seen there before. He blinks and sends her a questioning glance as his laughter stops.

Marinette gingerly leans forward and presses a tender kiss to his lips.

Claw freezes immediately as his eyes look into hers.

This is new, different, uncharted territory for him. Even when they kissed after the first time they said each other’s real name, it hadn’t been like this. They had kissed many times before but truthfully, it had always been somewhat…violent and intense. This isn’t what they did, this isn’t the dance they both know so well of angry kisses and violence. This is being intimate, honest, vulnerable. Things that neither of them knows how to do or be. The way she kissed him and is looking at him…there’s something he’s never seen before, something that makes his heart beat faster than it ever has and shakes him to his core.

Marinette takes in a slow breath, her eyes never leaving his.

“Do you have to go?” She asks.

Claw’s breath hitches in his throat.

This is something he thought would be impossible, the fact that this girl, THE girl, lying under him would want anything from him. She’s the only one who has seen every bit of him and never turns away, she sees the anger, the grief, the fear, all the things that his father seems to hate or hide from; she sees him as he truly is, as an absolute disaster, as Claw Noir, as her unyielding partner. She’s seen all of that, knows every grimy detail of the terrible things he’s done, but the way she’s looking at him in this moment is nothing but tender and wistful—like he is someone worth caring about. That kiss and those words were filled with hidden meanings and thoughts he never would have thought could be shared between him and his baker girl…his partner.

It isn’t the first time they kissed, far from it, but it had never been like this. It had never been gentle or sweet, that isn’t really who they are, but despite them being ‘more’ it had never been more than that. Sure, it was gentler when it was the first time they called each other’s name, but it wasn’t sweet or innocent—it simply was. Before this, he wasn’t even sure if they were capable of such a thing—not with how much they once hated each other. The two of them used to hate each other with every fiber of their beings, even if things had shifted, how could she ever see past all of the hate he had pointed at her?

‘Hate’ felt like such a wrong word now, knowing that she had been the girl he had been dreaming of this whole time. He didn’t hate her back then, he could never really hate her, he had just been blind to what was in front of him and too afraid to let her in. Despite all that, there she lays underneath him with eyes telling him things she can’t say, with a question that makes his heart race.

His whole life, everyone had always asked him to leave, no one really wanted him to stay long. They always wanted something from him and once they got it, they were more than happy to see him leave. All he has ever wanted is someone to ask him not to leave…to stay. And here is his baker girl, the one who captured his heart from the beginning, laying here hoping to convince him to stay.

There’s so much he wants to tell her in this moment, so much he wants her to know. That he would always come back to her, that he has never hated her—not really. That all she ever has to do is look at him the way she’s looking at him right now or kiss him the way she just did, and he would do anything she asks. He wants to tell her that his heart has always been hers, that he just didn’t know it. How could he tell her that he was always hers even if she didn’t know it?

If you’re Claw Noir, then you don’t. At least not with words.

“I should go.” Claw whispers back, terrified that he’s going to mess up whatever this is somehow.

Marinette nods in understanding as he pulls away, avoiding her eyes. He reaches towards the skylight above her bed and opens it to leave, unable to look at her.

She grabs his arm, and it takes everything in him not to look at her face, he doesn’t know what he would do if he saw relief on her face that he’s leaving and he isn’t willing to take the chance that he’s misunderstood this…whatever this is almost going to be.

“Claw?” Marinette says from beside him.

Marinette’s hands find their way to his shoulders, and he can’t help himself as her soft hands make their way to his face. He looks into those beautifully captivating eyes of hers and he sees all the things she won’t say out loud, all the things that shake him to the fiber of his being. One look into those eyes and he knows right away he is about to be putty in her hands.

“I don’t want you to go.” Marinette whispers. He swears he could almost hear both of them saying the things they never would because, how could they when they could hardly be good? Everyone always leaves me.

“And I don’t want to go.” Claw whispers back. I never will.

“Then stay.” Promise me.

“Okay.” I’m yours, I’m not going anywhere.

They don’t say another word for the rest of the night, he’s never slept in a bed that felt so warm.

#miraculous ladybug #shadybug #claw noir #speechless changes #fanfic

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justmywritingstuff · 1 year ago

Text

Speechless Changes~Number 2

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

Warnings: language

Word count: 1089

Author's note: Hello again! This is the next part, it's a shorter one, but I like how it turned out. I'll try to post the next chapter as soon as I can, so keep an eye out for it. Enjoy!

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Number 2: Claw Noir (first time she called him his name)

Claw sighs as he leans against the outer walls of the rebellion or resistance or whatever they’re called hideout—he should really find out what they’re calling themselves, but it would be weird to ask that at this point—the Seine water that went into the aqueduct he’s standing in glistening a bit with the morning sun. He had just left a debriefing with the others and Betterfly, he should probably go back home—no doubt his father had set up a photoshoot or lesson or other annoying thing that he’d have to do today, anything to keep him busy so the two of them didn’t have to actually see each other he supposed.

“Hey fleabag.” Shady says as she lightly (almost playfully, Claw notes, which is progress) punches Claw’s shoulder to get his attention from beside him. “What are we doing tonight?”

“Well, cockroach,” He answers with a flirty smile, “I was planning to terrorize some pigeons in the park tonight before patrol, you’re welcome to join me.”

“Ugh,” She groans. “you always want to go to the fucking park. Can’t we hang somewhere else for once? Why don’t we go to your rich-boy pad or something?”

“And have my father’s ridiculously fake smile follow us around the whole time? Hell, no. We can just go to your place and—”

“No.” Shady says immediately—almost far too quickly, Claw notes.

“What?” Claw complains. “You said you didn’t want to go to the park, fine. Why the hell can’t we go to your place?”

“Because I don’t want you to go there.” She says shortly like she’s trying to pick a fight but Claw notices…there’s something else in her voice, something he can’t place…something that always seems to come up when he brings up her home.

He mentally makes a note to bring it up again when she’s ready to talk about it, but seeing as she’s not, he decides to fall back into the dance they both know so well.

“Yeah?” Claw growls, pushing her. “Why the hell not, cockroach?”

He would never hurt her, not really, and she knew that, but…anger and aggression were part of who they were. So, now that they understood each other, the fighting, the arguing, the yelling…it actually brought them closer and made them like each other more. But, for obvious reasons, that’s probably why everyone still assumes they hate each other.

“You know what?” She growls back, getting in his face and pushing him harder than he pushed her. “Bite me, fleabag!”

Personal space has never really been a thing between them, even before they went to the other universe, so getting into each other’s face isn’t really anything new—the making each other weak in the knees thing, though, is, and Claw takes every opportunity he sees to do so.

Claw grins, knowing that Shady hates it when he takes her literally (or so she claims). “If you insist.”

He pushes her against the wall and hungrily kisses her lips, eagerly nipping the bottom one to make her moan. He moves his attention down her jaw and to her neck—his favorite place to give her attention—where he bites sensually.

Shady leans into his touch and squeezes his shoulders as she moans out, “Ah, Adrien.”

Claw freezes and pulls back to look at her, his eyes widening at her words.

Shady’s own eyes widen once she seems to realize what she said.

“I-I—shit. It just slipped out,” She stammers, “I was thinking about it and your name just…popped into my head. But you were…you were making it hard to focus w-with the biting and and...”

As Shady continues rambling, clearly terrified that she’s made a mistake, Claw doesn’t move or say anything. Shady finally notices and falls silent for a moment, glaring at him.

“…Will you just say something, fleabag?”

How could he? His entire world view is shifting.

“I-I…uh…” Claw answers, his words completely failing him. Which notably makes Shady get anxious—she is still a socially awkward teenager, social cues aren’t really her strong point.

“Oh no, what? Shit, what did I do? Fuck fuck, Adrien, I—Fuck! I didn’t mean anything, I swear I didn’t…” Shady stops as a dopey look spreads across his face, her urge to kill him back on her own face. “...Why are you looking at me like that?”"

Claw swallows hard, snapping himself out of it. He smiles and leans forward to press a gentle kiss to Shady’s lips, it’s sweet and innocent and different than their usual kisses. It’s filled with just as much want and desire yet completely different, slower, but…good different, Shady seems to find it oddly even more flustering.

“What…” She says, swallowing hard, “what was that?”

“That was the first time you used my real name.” Claw answers with a smile.

He places his hands on her cheeks and pecks her lips, for once to an onlooker, the two of them would actually look really sweet.

“Oh…" Shady says slowly. "I never realized.”

“Can you…” Claw hesitates, feeling vulnerable as he feels his heartbeat picking up. “…can you say it again?”

Shady smiles and wraps her arms around him, clearly enjoying this new kind of intimacy that hung between them.

“Like this? Adrien.” She kisses his cheek. “Adrien.” She kisses his other cheek. “Adrien.” She kisses him on the lips and leans her forehead against his.

Claw smiles wider, if that’s even possible, as his heart feels like it’s going to explode from joy. He imagines if he ever were to hear the song of sirens, he would hear Shady saying his name and throw himself into the water to find them every time.

He hums happily and closes his eyes. “Marinette.”

He had never called her by her real name before either, it always seemed too weird, but he likes the way her name tastes on his tongue.

He doesn’t open his eyes, but he can feel the smile that spreads across his partner’s face. Neither of them had ever felt something like this before, they knew every part of each other, every flaw, and accepted all of it. Between the violence and the tension and the yelling and everything else is something that Claw didn’t have a word for, but something that is both of theirs to have—whatever it is.

Standing there with Shady—no, Marinette—in his arms, he knew that this girl had him, his heart was hers…as soon as she said his name, he knew he was a goner.

#miraculous ladybug #shadybug #claw noir #fanfic #speechless changes

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justmywritingstuff · 1 year ago

Text

Speechless Changes~Number 1

Summary:

When you always have done whatever it takes to get your goals, it's very hard to change or surprise people--even harder to leave them speechless.

In other words, the six firsts of Shadybug and Claw Noir's relationship that left someone speechless.

Warnings: language

Word count: 3.3k+

Author's note: Hey so this is a series I made of what I imagine happens after the Shadybug and Claw Noir special in their world. It started as just a few paragraphs and then it became a bit of a series--I have no excuse. A line break means a change in POV. Check it out, if you'd like, enjoy!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Number 1: Shadybug (first kiss)

Stupid Claw was late to patrol again, the nerve on that asshole.

Shadybug mentally chastises herself at the thought as she taps her foot impatiently, old habits die hard. She’s trying—really trying—since she met her other self, but you don’t become nice and good easily and bad habits are very hard to break.

She’s trying to be good, really, she is. But, when it comes to Claw…well, her feelings are complicated, and she didn’t know how to deal with them. Change is scary and it didn’t happen overnight. She wants to change, wants Claw to be something other than a reluctant ally, wants him to be a partner or a friend or—

Thump. “I’m here, Bug Butt.”

This asshole.

Shady turns to Claw with a glare—a mean retort on the tip of her tongue—but as soon as she sees him cursing at himself angrily, she swallows her anger.

“Sorry,” Claw says, “I meant to say ‘Hey Shady’.”

“Lady.”

“Right, uh Lady now…sorry um old habits.”

“It’s okay,” Shady answers, understanding all too well, “I get it.”

The smile Claw answers her with is a polite and awkward one, but Shady counts it as a win. It’s strange to see a smile on Claw’s face, different, but maybe a good different. She’s always liked his face (not that she would ever let him know that) and really likes seeing all the new emotions on it.

She’s still trying to wrap her head around everything that she did like about him, it’s difficult to tell herself after spending so much time at each other’s throats that she could like things about him. It had become like a mantra to keep herself calm, every time she found something new it made the list even longer and easier to find something else.

She likes his bravery, his effort to change, and that he isn’t afraid of her. She likes the bell on his suit and imagines how cool it would feel in her fingers to grab to pull him into her. Wait, what? No, no, that isn’t what she likes. She likes his leather suit with the hot jacket and the way it hugs his muscles. Wait, no, that’s not right. She likes that his hair is tousled and messy, it looks soft enough to touch and run her hands through. What? No, that doesn’t make any sense. She likes his eyes. Yes! She liked the purple; it was over the top and flashy, but it was beautiful in a way that drew her in. She did like the purple, but she likes the green even more. The green makes him seem more human, more alive, more Claw, just…more. And the fact that they’re HIS eyes, yes, HIS eyes that are really that green without the mask.

“What?” Claw says.

Shady blinks, realizing she’s been staring, and tries to cover it with a scowl. “Nothing.”

“No, it’s not. What?”

“I keep forgetting that your eyes are green, that’s all.”

“Yeah? So?”

Shady scrambles for an answer, knowing she has to say something as an excuse.

“I was just thinking about how ridiculous it is that you’re actually that spoiled rich assho—” The words slip from her mouth without thinking and she grits her teeth, trying to catch herself, but she caught herself too late.

Claw clenches and unclenches his fists, clearly trying to stay calm. “You wanna try that again?”

She knows she should apologize, try to backtrack, but— “I said what I said, fleabag.” Why is she like this?

Shady mentally punches herself for saying anything at all. Why did she say that? That’s not what she meant to say, it just…slipped out. But then, what is she supposed to tell him? The truth? ‘Oh hey Claw, I didn’t mean to insult you, I was just listing the things I like about you in my head so I remember that I should be nice and I was focusing on your eyes so I wouldn’t think about how much I want to run my hands through your stupid hair or how much I like to see you in leather that shows off your stupid muscles or how much I think about grabbing your stupid bell and pulling you toward me.’ Obviously, she couldn’t tell him that’s the stuff she’s thinking about. Actually, why did she spend so much time thinking about that stuff? Normally, that’s just stuff she might think about if it’s someone she wants to…oh. OH!

---

Claw didn’t mean to be late today. He never really meant to be late, but things sometimes happen in his civilian life that make it difficult. He hates it, he hates that he has to be late sometimes to the one thing he doesn’t want to waste a minute of. Sure, Shady could be…difficult sometimes, but ever since they saw the other universe them, she’s been trying to be better like he is (well, at least he thought she was). And if Claw’s being honest, ever since everything in the other universe, he really likes spending time with her—violence and all. After the day he’s had—with his tedious work as a model and his father getting on his case again—he’s actually looking forward to seeing her. So, when he finally reaches their rooftop for patrol, he’s overjoyed to see she’s already there.

Thump. “I’m here, Bug Butt.”

Claw starts cursing, already feeling like an idiot before Shady could have called him one. When she doesn’t, he clears his throat and tries to start over.

“Sorry,” Claw says, “I meant to say ‘Hey Shady’.”

“Lady.” She corrects.

“Right, uh Lady now…sorry um old habits.”

“It’s okay, I get it.”

Old habits are hard to break and even harder to change, and as much as he really did want to change, he’s struggling. He isn’t sure if he should feel comforted or mad at himself for needing to hear that Shady is struggling too.

The smile Claw answers her with is a polite and awkward one, still feeling strange but gradually starting to feel more natural around her at least. It’s not much, but he considers that a win.

“What?” Claw says, realizing Shady is staring at him.

Shady blinks and scowls at him—speaking of old habits. “Nothing.”

Claw sends her a knowing look, clearly there’s something on her mind.

“No, it’s not.” He says. “What?”

“I keep forgetting that your eyes are green, that’s all.”

“Yeah?” He answers, wondering why would she care about his eyes. “So?”

“I was just thinking about how ridiculous it is that you’re actually that spoiled rich assho—” Shady cuts herself off.

Claw could see that she’s trying, and if she had been anyone else, he likely would have just let it go. But, this is Shady and this is a line they had both made it abundantly clear isn’t to be crossed, He couldn’t let the one person who knew that he’s more than that, that he hates when people say it that way, talk about him like that.

Claw tries to stay calm, he tries to give her the benefit of the doubt. He figures he’ll give her a chance to fix it, to prove that she didn't mean it and that it’s not a waste of time to keep trying with her.

He clenches and unclenches his fists. “You wanna try that again?”

“I said what I said, fleabag.”

Why is she being so horrible today of all days? She knew how much he hates when people treat him like that, he told her how much he hates it. She knows that and he knows how hard it is to change, but why can’t she see that’s too far? Why did he even bother?

“You know what?” Claw growls angrily. “Screw you! And screw this!”

Claw extends his baton and bounds across the rooftops, wanting to get as far away as possible from Shady. He thought things could change. He thought that they could both really change for the better, but clearly she can’t if she can’t even see what she did wrong. He needs to get away from her, she clearly wants nothing to do with him and that’s too painful for him to bear. Yet…a small part of him is screaming at him to stay, but he knows he can’t do it. He can’t bring himself to stay and try for things to be different, he—

“Claw, wait!” Shady yells. “Please!”

He freezes mid jump and stumbles against a rooftop as he hears Shady’s voice. He’s never ever heard her say ‘please’ before. He turns slowly to see Shady yo-yoing her way to him, reaching the rooftop he stood the moment he fully turns.

“I’m sorry.” She says.

Claw blinks, completely surprised, he always expects her to say a lot of things to him but that certainly has never been one of them.

“What?”

“I’m sorry.” Shady repeats slowly, like she’s struggling with the words.

Claw swears his heart skips a beat, this is new territory. He knows that isn’t something easy for her to say, especially to him with how much they were at each other’s throats before the other universe. He couldn’t explain it, but he just needed to hear her say that. It meant she hadn’t given up when it came to him, which meant there’s a chance. Now, knowing how hard it is for her to say something like that, he should be content with that alone. But, then he wouldn’t be Claw Noir.

Claw raises a challenging eyebrow, knowing he’s about to try to milk this and she would probably beat the life out of him for it—truthfully, he kind of likes it when she chases him, especially when she tackles him and they end up tangled together (not that he could ever tell her that…that’s for a different reason, he thinks).

“For?” Claw asks, knowing it’s going to piss her off.

He expects her to fight with him, he expects her to fall into the dance they both know so well. She apologized, and that’s enough, that’s more than he could have asked for. He’s content with her apology and the idea that she is willing to is enough to make him never give up on her. He knows that she doesn’t owe him anything more than that, he understands that she’s trying and respects that, so he expects them to fall back into the dance of acting like they want to kill each other.

Shady angrily grits her teeth but surprises him by taking a deep breath to calm down instead of raising her fist.

“I’m trying to be better, Claw.” Shady says and he swears he can hear the honesty in her voice. “But, I’m broken and damaged and fucked up and it doesn’t come easy. So, I’m sorry for every bit of it, every mistake I keep making, every time I act like a bitch. I know I get angry, so angry that I feel like I need to explode. I want to be better, I’m going to be better, but it takes time. I know you probably hate me, and I don’t blame you, but I don’t want us to hate each other. I want us to be better than that…more than we were.”

Claw feels like getting hit by a truck. This is Shady, his Shady, who stands in front of him trying to be good and better and change. Shady who looks like she might break, who is the most capable person he knows and could crush him if she wanted to. Shady who bites back with venom and malice and no fear. Shady who is the baker girl that he had always been drawn to but was too much of a coward to ever speak to her. Shady who tries harder than he could ever admit to be the person her other-universe self would be proud of. Shady, who he realizes after everything that had changed since the other universe, still thinks that his only feelings toward her are hate. That, that he can’t allow to be—not for his Shady.

“I don’t hate you,” Claw says as he takes several steps toward her, his eyes locked on hers. “That’s not what this is.”

Shady instinctively takes a few steps back as she speaks. “Then what is it?”

“I just get frustrated sometimes, that’s all.” Claw takes another step forward, needing her to understand. “I-I want us to be…more.”

Shady takes another step back, her back hitting the wall of a chimney. “W-we can be friends.”

Claw takes a final step forward, close enough that Shady can feel his breath on her face. No, that’s not what he wants, that isn’t what they are. He shakes his head—his gaze never once wavering.

“I wouldn’t say friends.” Claw says.

Shady narrows her eyes, anger trying to hide her hurt. “Fine, then we wo—”

Claw slams his lips onto hers before she can get out another word.

He knows it’s a bad idea, he knows that she’s going to beat the life of him. But he couldn’t help himself, every instinct in his body is screaming at him to know what her lips taste like—they’re the most intoxicating passionfruit he’s ever tasted—and he knows Shady will probably make him regret it. In the moment, though, it feels like a need, like something he had to do to survive. For him, even if it’s only for half a second, it feels like an out of body experience where for the first time in who knows how long the world isn’t as much of a shitty place. It feels like this is the very thing he was always meant to do, and in the moment, damn the consequences.

What shocks him back into his own body, however, is the fact that Shady starts moving her lips against his. She’s kissing him back!

Claw smiles against her lips as his hands move down to her sides, bringing her as close as he possibly can and finding she still isn’t close enough. She’s invading all his senses, all his thoughts, everything is her.

He deepens the kiss a little, testing the waters but mainly just wanting more of her in any way he can—she doesn’t push him away. She squeezes his arm slightly in response and he pulls away, staying close enough that their breath is still mingling.

Claw opens his eyes slightly, wanting, no, NEEDING to see what she’s thinking. He wants more—more of her intoxicating lips, more of her hands on him, just more of her.

Shady opens her eyes and blinks completely shocked and confused.

“D-did you just…” She takes a really long pause, struggling to find the words. “…kiss me?”

Claw smirks slightly, having another idea Shady might punch him for.

“If you insist.” He says.

He kisses her again, more urgently this time. Again, she doesn’t stop him but kisses him back as her arms make their way up to his neck to pull him closer.

He nips at her bottom lip, and she gasps in surprise, he immediately puts his tongue into her mouth and she moans in response—urging him to continue. His hands start to wander, tracing the curves of her hips as one hand finds its way down her thigh to rest just below her knee to hold her there.

He could feel every bit of her pressed against him, every intoxicating curve that he’s dying to know. He wonders for a moment if her skin is really this warm under the suit and if she could feel every bit of him that he felt of her. He wonders if this is how it feels to be addicted to something, to try it once and immediately be hooked.

He briefly pulls away from her lips so she can catch her breath, peppering kisses along her cheek to her jaw, he sucks on the bit of exposed skin and Shady moans again as he leaves a mark—her hands pulling slightly at the hair at the bottom of his neck and causing Claw to moan himself.

Claw kisses the sensitive skin of her jaw once more and returns his attention to her lips. This time when his tongue goes into her mouth, hers responds hungrily like that is where they were meant to be. His hands start to roam again and end up right under the curve of her butt to hold her legs on either side of him and hold her up. His hips press into hers, his leather suit and her bodysuit the only things between their entangled bodies. She is every thought, every idea, everything Claw wants in that moment.

After a very long couple of minutes, Claw finally reluctantly pulls his lips off hers—spit briefly caught between them as he pulls away, whose he isn’t sure, but seeing it sets his body on fire and makes him want to kiss her again and again until her breath is permanently mixed with his. He resists that desire, though with extreme difficulty, since they both need to catch their breath and it took everything he had to pull away.

They stay entangled, neither of them daring to move as they pant for air.

Claw eyes Shady, who is still stunned by his actions, and waits for her to process it. He sees it on her face as soon as she does because her eyes widen and a deep blush spreads across her cheeks.

“I-I uh I…you…” She stutters, trying to find the right words.

Claw smiles, for the first time ever he thinks the only word that could properly describe her is cute. He leans back so she can see him easier, suddenly very serious.

“Not friends.” He says. “Much, much more than that.”

Shady whines weakly, words still completely failing her.

Claw chuckles and feels like he’s floating, his feet still not touching the ground. He leans his forehead against hers, his hands caressing her thighs as her eyes briefly dart to his lips—still trying to find her words.

“What’s wrong, cockroach?” Claw whispers lowly. “Cat got your tongue?”

Shady glares at him threateningly, snapping herself out of it and punching his shoulder—not an ounce of malice behind it.

They smile at each other for a moment as Claw pries them apart, both of them missing the closeness they shared. Claw takes a step back to put some distance between them, suddenly overly aware of what just happened as he stops smiling--despite all his posturing, he's still just a socially inept teenager. Shady seems to realize the same thing and stops smiling at the same time.

Claw coughs awkwardly and Shady avoids his eyes. He looks at Shady, she feels his gaze and looks at him, he immediately looks away.

He can feel Shady watching him, he wonders if maybe she can hear his heart about to beat out of his chest. She clears her throat to get his attention and he almost too quickly whips his head to look at her.

“So uh…” She swallows hard. “What um…what do you want to be then?”

“More than friends?” Claw answers carefully, not trusting his own words.

“What would you call that?”

Claw hesitates thoughtfully. “…I uh I don’t know. I…this is new to me.”

“How about we uh…” Shady awkwardly looks to the ground, “we just start with the friends part?”

“Oh.” Claw answers, disappointed. “Okay.”

He makes to turn away, not sure he can meet her eyes after having her body pressed to his and having the intoxicating flavor of her lips and skin burning his lips. He would accept her rejection if that’s what she wants, even if it hurt or even if he didn’t understand why, he would do anything for her.

Before he can turn away, however, Shady reaches out and grabs his bell.

He looks at Shady questioningly, but she’s still looking at the ground.

“Um…what are you doing?” Claw asks, resisting the urge to insult her like he usually would when he’s hurt and the much louder urge to look at her perfectly soft lips.

“Working on the ‘more’ part.”

“What?”

She meets his eyes and smirks.

“It’s like you said, fleabag.” She pulls him toward her with his bell, pressing them against each other and causing him to grunt. She licks her lips and Claw’s breath catches in his throat. “Cat got my tongue.”

Those perfect lips will be the death of him, and if they are, he’ll die a very happy man.

#miraculous ladybug #fanfic #shadybug #claw noir #speechless changes

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