jenthebug

[jenthebug]

For the past few days, I’ve been taking involuntary naps. I sit down on the recliner, I fall the fuck asleep, I am powerless against it.

I wonder if this is a post covid thing?

[jenthebug]

Doordashing was pretty cool tonight until my last run.

I delivered to a legit McMansion, on the outskirts of town in a beautiful suburb where the streets make no sense and everyone has a three car garage.

For some reason, I had to get a signature on the delivery. (Looked it up: the reason is that they’ve had many problems with missing orders before. Prolific porch pirates or flagrant fraud?) At first, the customer wouldn’t come down. I told her the choices were signing for it or I’d return it to the restaurant. She finally came down and signed.

I made the mistake of not looking at the order payment until after the fact: $2.00 (no tips).

I drove 8 miles and got hassled for no tip?

I went home after that. Fuck it.

[jenthebug]

I wish every mutual of mine who’s deactivated or ever deactivates a very wonderful life. Thank you for the pieces of your mind. The snippets of your life. The pockets of love. I will remember in my own little ways.

[jenthebug]

Last night, I had a dream about a novel, a YA novel that I wrote.

Katie is the main character. She’s an aro/ace 17-year-old high school student who’s obsessed with horses. She barrel races.

Josie is her twin sister, and is the most popular girl in school (because she’s the friendliest).

Neal is Katie’s best friend. He’s also obsessed with horses.

Katie deals with the typical senior year struggles (college admissions, passing her classes, her and Josie’s birthday party, prom); the big rodeo coming up; and Neal acting strange and pulling away.

It ends with Neal coming out as trans, and worrying that Katie won’t accept her. Neal, now Leah, has nothing to worry about from Katie and Josie. Katie offers to teach her how to barrel race, and Josie gives her makeup lessons.

I just wonder if “slice of life” is enough plot for a novel.

I mean, I know I’ll have fun writing it, so I’m gonna write it no matter what, but I wonder if anyone would publish it.

(Then again, I have three other completed, unpublished novels just sitting around, so whatever)

“I worry about Katie, honey,” Mom said. Her and Dad sat at the kitchen table.

“Why?” Dad asked.

“Josie is inviting 20 people to the birthday party, and they know Katie, but they’re not really her friends. She doesn’t really have any.”

“I have Neal!” Katie interrupted from the living room, mouth full of pizza rolls.

“You can’t just rely on one person for all your emotional needs, sweetie.” Mom’s eyes softened.

“I have Thunder.” Katie swallowed.

“Thunder’s a horse. She can’t help you emotionally.”

Katie thought about sitting atop Thunder, the cool wind hitting her face as she leaned close enough to the barrels to touch them; the exhilaration taking her breath away. “Oh, yeah she can.”

[jenthebug]

So you know my Switch 2 that’s supposed to be coming in the mail?

The package store where it was awaiting transfer to USPS just got heavily damaged in a fire.

BUT

No injuries!

And no injuries at the bar next door!

And the switch is a birthday present anyway, so I’m really in no rush to get it. Obviously I want it (who doesn’t want free video games?) but having it arrive later isn’t going to offend or inconvenience me. It’s just how things go sometimes.

I’ll still have the original switch so I can play that way.

^ Twin Bro, whoopin my ass lol

[jenthebug]

Woke up this morning like omg why am I so sore? Then I remembered that I worked out yesterday!

Warmup - 20 minute, one mile walk

Upper body -

Chest press 20lbs x20

Lat pulldown 50lbs x20

Shoulder press 20lbs x20

😅

Back at it!

[jenthebug]

Got my hair cut.

It makes more sense now, and it’s gonna grow out nice, but I don’t like it right now. It calls too much attention to my face and frames it in an unflattering way.

On the other hand, like I said, it’s about to look awesome when it grows out.

I’ll mess with it next time I wash it.

[jenthebug]

No more Covid!!

I have therapy at 1500. Trying to decide whether to DoorDash until then or not. I’m definitely going out after therapy for the dinner rush, but lunch?

I’d probably get 2 hours, 4 runs…would it really be worth it? Nah. What I really want to do is go to Dutch Bros and get an energy drink, and I need gas, so maybe I’ll do those things.

I got to kiss Husband for the first time since I left for Seattle. 🥰 And I get to sleep in my bed tonight, I’m super stoked about that. I’m liking the nightly biscuits visits from Soba, but they wake me up, and, ouch.

(I tried to clip his little claws a few minutes ago. He tried to end my life.)

8 days until my interview with Private Ambulance. I don’t know what to wear. I have an interview outfit, but what if it’s 90+ degrees out? It won’t work. It’s a long sleeved blouse and (do the pants still fit?) maybe a long skirt.

Maybe I’ll do Dutchies, gas station, and thrift shop. That sounds good.

[jenthebug]

Fun stuff:

My birthday present!! Twin Bro and @unic0rnthe0ry got my birthday present and it’s *A SWITCH 2* with Mario Kart World!! 🥹😭 We can go on Mario Kart road trips now! It should arrive this weekend, and I have the go ahead to open and play it, even though my birthday is in September! AND!! Mario Paint is coming to Nintendo Switch Online!

Meh stuff:

Husband just came downstairs with a check and said “Once you’re feeling better, we can figure out what to do about my new car!” I don’t want to do Car Shopping with him; I don’t want the whole dealership experience that he seems attached to. I’d much rather find a car online, say “I’m here for this exact Subaru and here is my money,” and be done with it. But, if I have to go through it with someone, it might as well be him.

Interview practice with Squish on Friday. Interview next Friday. This is for Private Ambulance, the job that I really want, so I’m nervous. I should be a shoo-in; I have more than a decade of experience, but then again, I washed out of training at my last job.

Husband filled out a questionnaire about my ADHD symptoms. I told him not to worry about offending me and to answer truthfully, so he did. I read the answers, and honestly, I’m a little hurt. It’s that obvious, huh? I feel like I’m failing as a wife, with all the disorganization and disorder. Oh well, it’s good data.

Other stuff:

For the past couple nights, Soba has woken me up in the middle of the night by jumping on my lap and !!making biscuits!! It’s so cute and it hurts so bad! He needs his claws clipped again.

My ear has started to hurt. It better stop hurting, I don’t want an ear infection.

I’m using Finch now (my birb’s name is Beep, she’s cute). It’s helpful, but I can’t help but think I can optimize it more to work more effectively with my life specifically.

[jenthebug]

I was scheduled to have my ADHD follow up tomorrow. I called to switch it to telehealth and said “I’m on Day 8 of Covid.”

“We can’t switch it to telehealth but we don’t want you coming in with Covid…how about August 21st?”

That’s SO far out! I might even be working by then! Which would mean taking time off. 🙄

I had the option to make it a telehealth appointment during my first appointment when we were setting it up, and I didn’t, because of course I wasn’t anticipating getting Covid.

This is bullshit.

And I know that it won’t matter six months from now, I’ll have my diagnosis and medication (or not), I’ll be working, it’ll be fine. But it matters now!

[jenthebug]

Guess who’s on my lap? 🥰

I should be going to bed. But…Soba.

Besides, I slept all morning, so I’m not surprised that I’m staying up late.

Tomorrow I take another covid test to see if I need to move my next ADHD assessment appointment to telehealth. I hope this process gets done soon, I want to know if there’s actually a word for why I’m such a mess (and a pill I can take to mitigate the effects).

I wrote out some sample interview questions and answers for practice; Squish and I are going out on Friday for boba and interview practice. Moving right along like a herd of turtles.

[jenthebug]

Finished my assessment for Public Transit.

Getting that feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach whenever I imagine actually dispatching Public Transit police.

They pay buckets of money, but for what? Harassing drug users and loiterers and fare evaders, mostly.

They do have some nice saves on medical calls, but is that enough?

Hopefully this is a moot point and I blow my interview with Private Ambulance out of the water.

[jenthebug]

@maddygoesthemiles tagged me for a selfie!

It’s Day 7 of Covid. I’m feeling almost back to normal today, no cold meds on board, just a little runny nose. But I keep falling asleep 😴

I was kicking the idea of going to the farmers market around; it’s outside, I’d mask, etc. But I think I’m too tired.

Instead, I’ll poke around my Steam library and play things I haven’t tried yet, starting with OpenRCT (turns RCT2 into a sandbox; no objectives!).

But first, another nap.

I tag @fatmaninalittlesuit @belovedgoofball @liftingweights-and-coffeedates @thehopeandthehurt

What’s up?

[jenthebug]

grown men will throw fits about how they face sooo much rejection and women would never get it meanwhile me and the girls who were even just like average or a lil ugly at like 12 years old were being treated like we were subhuman by peers and adults alike

[jenthebug]

Squish has a daaaaate!! 💕

He better not be an asshole 😈

[jenthebug]

Feeling so much better this morning that I threw a load of laundry in and took a Covid test!

Still positive.

I’ll test again on Monday so I know whether or not to make my psychologist appointment on Tuesday into a telehealth appointment.

This, I think, is where things get dangerous. I’m feeling well enough to do chores. But I’m still a big walking cootie bomb. So I have to be extra vigilant about masking and hand washing and staying downstairs.

The first days were easy; I felt so bad that all I did was lay there. Isolating myself was easy.

Now I want to play Mario Kart (touch the switch) and do art (go upstairs) and eat all the things (touch all the food packaging) and do the dishes (touch the clean ones) and it’s not a good idea.

Maybe I’ll make a bunch of nails. 💅

And call a bunch of people.

And email all my old Facebook friends that I got email addresses for.