jazzcigarettetx-blog

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Get Bryan Gutmann’s debut album, That’s How Scientists Talk

They very funny Bryan Gutmann has an album out today, That’s How Scientists Talk, and it is very much worth your time and money. Go here to purchase it. Go here (points to heart) to really listen to it.

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Monday August 24: Andy Ritchie Benefit Show

Earlier this year, Funniest Person in Austin Winner 2011 Andy Ritchie underwent treatment for a brain tumor. As you can guess, shit's expensive and Andy has missed a lot of work. Jazz Cigarette is throwing a benefit show for Andy, featuring a line-up full of past FPIA winners. All proceeds from this show go directly to Andy.

Your line-up for late August: -Bryan Gutmann (FPIA  Winner 2007) -Eric Krug (FPIA Winner 2008) -Mario Digorgio (FPIA Winner 1999) -Martha Kelly (FPIA Winner 2000) -Mac Blake (FPIA Winner 2013)

Hosted by Danny Palumbo (FPIA Winner 2015) and Aaron Brooks (FPIA attendee)

Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm.

If you can’t make it to the show, but still want to help out, here’s an indiegogo for Andy.

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Monday August 10: Abby Rosenquist

We love comedy. We love love Austin comedy. So when Abby Rosenquist got selected for the New Faces of Comedy Showcase at this year's Just for Laughs Festival in Montreal, we were doing backflips and whippets and throwing garbage cans through the windows of small business. Word is she didn't pretty good up there. So come see Abby as part of a stacked line-up, in her first headlining set since the festival. Your line-up for early August: -Abby Rosenquist (Just For Laughs New Faces of Comedy) -Raul Sanchez (Winner Funniest Comic in South Texas) -Albert Im (Handsome devil) -Allen Edwin Butt (Not a stage name) Hosted by Aaron Brooks and Danny Palumbo Tickets are $5 at the door, $2 for students, FREE for service industry. Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm.

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Monday July 27: Duncan Carson

FOMO. Fear of missing out. It's a term for the anxiety we feel about fun happening without us. I get it. Sometimes people try and compensate by oversharing what they're doing. "If I instafacetweet this picture of me with my fun level at 11, then it doesn't matter what anyone is doing." It's dumb, right? Fun shouldn't be a competition. That being said, if you miss this next show then OMG YOU FUCKED UP YOU LOSE WHERE WERE YOU?!?!?!?! Duncan Carson is a criminally underrated comedian. He's been one of Austin's best for years now. Come see him headline our late July show. Your line-up for 7/27 -Duncan Carson (Sure Thing, Limestone Comedy Festival) -Ralphie Hardesty (Greetings from Queer Mountain) -Kerri Lendo (No Shame Theater, I've never seen her wear a scarf but she has to have like 8 right) -Ben Cholok (too poor for scarves) Hosted by Aaron Brooks and SPECIAL guest host Mac Blake Tickets are $5 at the door, $2 for students, FREE for service industry. Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm.

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Monday July 12: Cody Hustak and Ryan Cownie Farewell Show!

Brace yourselves. Cody Hustak and Ryan Cownie will soon be gone. At the end of July these two ex-Nebaskans will also be ex-Austinites. Cody and Ryan are packing up their meager belongings and heading to LA to pursue their comedy careers and to pay more for drugs.

Before they go, these two weirdos are going to co-headline Jazz Cigarette. Don't miss the farewell outing of Ryan and Cody.

Also on the line-up: -Rob Gagnon (Sandbox, FPIA finalist) -Andrew Rosas (Master Pancake Theater, STAG Comedy)

Hosted by Aaron Brooks and Danny Palumbo.

Because it's a special show tickets will be $8 at the door. Advance tickets will be at the usual price of $5 (tickets on sale soon)

Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm.

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Monday June 22: Joe Hafkey

So, Joe Hafkey is going to headline Jazz Cigarette. Isn't that CONVENIENT. I mean, he used to host the show, and now he's headlining. Sounds like we got another Halliburton situation on our hands. Looks like JazzCig is just another show in the pocket of Big Laffs. The dude has opened for Kyle Kinane a whole bunch of times. Connect the dots, sheeple. Who else is on this broken chuckle system: Your June 22nd line-up: -Joe Hafkey (Moontower Comedy Festival, shadow government member) -Amber Bixby (web series 'Pretty Awful', Anti-IMF) -Yusef Roach (2015 FPiA Finalist, Freemason) -Andrew Rosas (Master Pancake Theater, Bildaberg founder) -Sara June (not a comedian, like a legit war profiteer) Hosted by Aaron Brooks and Danny Palumbo. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry. JC Shows are on the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month. Co-presented by our friends at ColdTowne Theater.

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Monday June 8: Two-year Anniversary Show!

Jazz Cigarette is turning two years old and we're doing it up big kid style. Our second anniversary show will feature an all-star line-up, guest-hosts and more.

Our 2-a-versary line-up: -Chris Cubas (@midnight) -Matt Bearden (Punch!, Piranha) -Ella Gale (2015 FPIA Finalist 3rd place) -Tafadzwa Gwaze (2015 FPIA Finalist)

Plus in-between sets, guest-hosts will riff on topics chosen by the audience. -Lisa Friedrich & Rob Gagnon (hosts of ATX Comedy Hour​) -Abby Rosenquist & Martin Urabno (hosts of the Damn, Dirty, Filthy Show) -Joe Hafkey & Mac Blake (former JazzCig hosts, current meth users)

Hosted by Aaron Brooks and the FRESHLY CROWNED Funniest Person in Austin winner Danny Palumbo.

Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

JC Shows are on the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month. Co-presented by our friends at ColdTowne Theater.

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Monday May 11: John Buseman!

"The Buse is Loose." That's what John Buseman says right before he exposes himself in public. It's also what the papers printed right after he escaped the Allan B. Polunsky Unit. He's a wild man, that one. One time I saw John Buseman put his cigarette out on a grown man's ice cream cone - and that man was JULIO FRANCO. You've got some balls, Buseman. Julio Franco was the pride of the Atlanta Braves. Crazy good lineup, and OH, we are damn excited for the JC debut of Casey Crawford! As always hosted by Aaron and Danny, voted 2015's bash brothers by bro-life mag. Our 5/11 show features: -John Buseman (Moontower, Hell Yes Fest, AC Lerok) -Christina Parrish (OOB Comedy Festival) -Michael Priest (Moontower, FPIA Finalist) ~And making his JC debut~ -Casey Crawford (FPIA Semi-Finalist) Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry. Shows are on the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month. Presented by our friends at ColdTowne Theater.

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Jazz Cigarette April 27: Raul Sanchez

Moontower is over. The celebrities have all flown home. Todd Barry is feasting on orphans in another city now. That leaves Austin with only.... a fucking awesome killer comedy scene. To prove it, we're putting on another great show with a stellar line-up (like we do every time). Our 4/27 show features: -Raul Sanchez (Funniest Comic in Texas winner) -Maggie Maye (Schtick!) ~And making their JC debuts~ -Maria Heinegg (NYC) -Nick Saverino (ATX) As always, we’re at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Jazz Cigarette April 13: Ryan Cownie

Ryan Cownie never gets old. Not only is willingness to experiment on stage make him one of Austin's most unpredictable (and hilarious) comedians, but he's also pretty much stopped aging. Must be all the preservatives in the garbage he drinks. Seriously, if you are in need of a human heart, his will probably explode out of his chest in the first 15 minutes thanks to all the 5 Hour energy and Mountain Dew that has replaced his blood. Bring a mit and a poncho. He also recently opened for Adam Devine at the Paramount. Pretty cool. Your line-up for April 13th -Ryan Cownie (Moontower Comedy Festival, Shit's Golden) -Andrew Murphy (Sure Thing) ~and making their JC debuts~ -Abby Rosenquist -Alli Amrien And joining Danny Palumbo for this show, old co-host Mac Blake. As always, we’re at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Jazz Cigarette March 23rd: Avery Moore

You guys know Build-A-Bear, right? It's a store in the mall where American children get to emulate Chinese factory workers. Picking out the body parts and stuffing, like a mad scientist at a toy bear cemetery. I don't know why that's appealing, seeing the guts. When I was a kid, my stuffed bear was made out of nothing but friendship and magic, kind of like your headliner Avery Moore. Avery is so funny and charming, I think her mom fucked a Lisa Frank trapper keeper and 9 months later out came Avery. THAT'S A COMPLIMENT! Your line-up for March 23rd: -Avery Moore (The Late Slots, Moontower) -Brendan K. O'Grady (Sure Thing) -Jay Whitecotton (Cape Fear Comedy Fest) -Cody Greenlee (Available for long hugs and odd jobs) ~and making his JC debut~ -Tre Howard As always we’re at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Jazz Cigarette March 9th: Pat Dean

We watch a lot of live comedy. Whether it's this show, other live shows, open mics, videos, etc. Occasionally there are comedians, that when you see them for the first time, they make you say, "this person is a straight-up weirdo." Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you, Austin's King of Comedy, Pat Dean. Your line-up for March 9th: -Pat Dean (Storyfellers Podcast) -Kath Barbadoro (Master Pancake Theater) ~and making their Jazz Cigarette debuts~ -JF Harris (NYC) -JT Kelley (TITS Standup) As always we’re at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Get Mac Blake's debut album, Bird Drugs

Former Jazz Cigarette host Mac Blake dropped his debut album this week, Bird Drugs, on Sure Thing Records. The album debuted at #3 on the iTunes Comedy Chart (as of this posting it's #15). It's a great album and you can get it right here.

Here's an excerpt:

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Jazz Cigarette February 23rd: Lashonda Lester

Even though JC is only twice a month, science has proven it lives forever in your hearts. We have another great line-up for you, check THIS shit out.

Your 2/23 line-up:

-Lashonda Lester (Weird! True Hollywood Tales​, FPiA Finalist)

-Katie Pengra (The Buzz Kill)

-Zac Brooks (The Guest Room)

~and making his Jazz Cigarette debut~

-Joe Staats (Altercation Punk Comedy Tour)

As always we’re at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Jazz Cigarette Feb 9th: John Ramsey

I know what you're wondering, "does that guy want to hurt me?". No, don't be ridiculous. That's John Ramsey, one of the funniest people in Austin. Also, one of the nicest. Yes that stare feels like it's piercing your soul, and yes he does have powers that reveal to him your darkest secrets, but c'mon! Who doesn't have those powers nowadays, amirite? ...where am I going with all of this... RIGHT! This is going to be an AWESOME show

Your February 9th line-up is:

-John Ramsey (Conan, Comedy Central) -Mike MacRae (Letterman, Howard Stern) -David McQuary (The Onion) -Jacques Ntonme (smarter than all of us combined) -a video from Stag Comedy​

As always we're at the resplendent Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry.

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Jazz Cigarette Jan 26: Jon Mendoza

Hello, this is your landlord. Normally I would not involve myself in your day-to-day, but your neighbors have complained about the loud sobbing coming from your unit. I understand that life is a brief flickering candle that god can blow out anytime he wants. I'm a landlord, how could I not? Why not get out of the house and get a few laughs? Just look at the line-up for the next JazzCig: -Jon Mendoza (Moontower Comedy Festival, FPiA Finalist) -Ralph Hardesty (Bridgetown Comedy Festival) -Avery Moore (The Late Slots) -a video from STAG Comedy ~and making his JC debut~ -Andrew Dismukes As always, we're at the fancy-pants Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry. See? Life ain't so bad. Now please try and keep your patio clean.

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Jazz Cigarette Jan 12: Chris Tellez! (Plus the debut of Aaron & Danny)

Jazz Cigarette presents its first show with brand new hosts Aaron Brooks and Danny Palumbo! These guys are the best and will make the show all their own about 5 seconds after they take the stage. Your Mondays are in good hands. 

Here's the line-up: -Chris Tellez (Shit's Golden) -Duncan Carson (Sure Thing) -Raul Sanchez (Winner Funniest Person in South Texas) ~and making his JC debut~ -Sam Harter As always we're at the luxurious Spider House Ballroom. Doors 9pm. Show 9:30pm. $5 at the door. $2 for students. FREE for service industry. Shows are on the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month. Presented by our friends at ColdTowne Theater.