jasonball34

[jasonball34]

My Obsessive Artemis Fowl Collection

[jasonball34]

44:07 in this video https://www.youtube.com/live/a1ygsaXCX3A?t=2647s

Does anyone remember what Juliet's backstory was?

Quick question, (yes I am writing a fan fic). I remembered a while back that Eoin gave us details in like an interview or something that Juliet was born in America in a prison??? Is that real or am I pulling things out of thin air?

Also, can someone tell me what happens at the end of "The Fowl Twins get what they deserve"? I can not be bothered to finish that particular book (I usually love Eoin's work but that... just wasn't it) and I can't find any book summaries.

Hope you all are doing well, 🧡

[jasonball34]

The musical has been in the works for years

I made this video compilation of clips from 2020-2021 in which Eoin floats the idea of a musical and then confirms he is working on something Fowl-related besides the books.

Eoin Colfer has written many other stage shows/musicals, you just don't hear much about them because they haven't played in America. But he's wanted to do Artemis for years. It took longer than he expected to come to fruition, but he's been working on this for a while.

Personally, I hope they're in contact with Lara McDonnell and/or Josh Gad and that they reprise their roles. They're both experienced and talented musical theater actors and were excellently cast in the movie, perhaps better fits than certain other characters' actors were. Eoin Colfer has on multiple occasions expressed public support for Lara so I hope it crosses his mind to attempt to cast her, especially after she expressed enthusiasm for the musical in 2020.

[jasonball34]

Really good analysis from some of you guys. I appreciate you sticking up for us hartemis fans even if you're not explicitly in favor of the ship. And for the record, since it came up, I for one would indeed be much more active here if people didn't post hate on hartemis content. It is in fact true that we have been at least a little bit driven away. Not because I can't handle a few insults but because I just don't have the time of day to deal with them.

Not something I’d normally post but this has infuriated me for YEARS. The most popular Artemis Fowl ship is Hartemis. For anyone that doesn’t know, it is the titular character x a character named Holly Short. I don’t know, but I never noticed any chemistry between them but that’s not the point. The problem with this ship is that Holly is in her 80s and Artemis is 15 at the end of the series. Nobody ever seems to notice or care about that fact, though. Not only that, but she KISSED HIM. She kissed him and nobody acknowledges how messed up that is.

[jasonball34]

fowl fest 2024 day 1

[jasonball34]

hey Noa/Mae fans

There is a romantic ship that exists in the realm of sci-fi/fantasy. It consists of 2 characters of different species, and the 2 characters could be considered adversaries at times. One of them has a disdain for the others' species because that species took over the planet Earth from the first species. The two species have different lifespans, and by virtue of this, it might seem questionable to ship them if you look too closely at their age numbers (but the real ones know otherwise).

I am 100% truthfully describing 2 ships here: Noa/Mae from Planet of the Apes, and Artemis/Holly from the book series Artemis Fowl.

If you are a fan of Noa/Mae, I invite you into the Artemis Fowl fandom! You'd love the Artemis/Holly ship. It's got that same interspecies enemies-to-allies thing going on. We need more people like you guys, people who are clearly extremely open-minded about ships!

The Noa/Mae troop is doing great stuff btw. You guys are writing and drawing amazing stuff for your ship and made me go from denier to believer.

And to any AF fandom folks who like to hate on the A/H ship... I invite you to go check out what they're doing over in Planet of the Apes land if you want a new ship to be judgmental about! (Edit: This last part is a joke!! I apologise if it was in poor taste. I'm not literally telling haters to go harass. I'm trying to open their eyes to the fact that this great ship exists and want them to see it's not just the AF ship that checks all the boxes I described so we're not crazy for shipping it. Haters, mute don't harass!)

[jasonball34]

Eoin Colfer, the troll

The 'advance reading copies' of all the books in the Artemis Fowl series contained the full text of the book... except for The Last Guardian. That book's ARC cuts off halfway through the book, with this message on the final page

[jasonball34]

New Hartemis fic by me

[jasonball34]

A little comic that I like to call “how the fuck do u draw Artemis” of @jasonball34 ‘s amazing fanfiction “unfiltered perception”

[jasonball34]

another rare AF promotional pamphlet

I posted a few months ago about how I'd acquired an uncommon Artemis Fowl promotional booklet containing some exclusive content. Well, here's another one!

This one is smaller (14 pages), and is really just a few activities for kids, but it's wrapped up in a really fun presentation: It's a Human Intelligence Agent passport! That's right, if you're carrying one of these bad boys, you are officially part of the LEP.

Here's the front and back covers. It was evidently produced in 2003 to promote Eternity Code. It's about 4.5x6 inches, and the cover really sort of feels like an official passport. It's thick cardstock, I believe. The pages inside are standard paper. Basically, the point of it is that kids can complete the activities inside to receive stamps, and when they've done them all, they are officially an agent. Idk if the event staff were stamping these things at whatever event in 2003 was passing them out or not, but that seems likely to me. I was a small child in 2003 and there wasn't much info alongside the item when I got it so who knows.

I might as well post all of the pages. I am especially amused by the wrong answers included on some of the multiple choice questions.

Something I find notable is that the gnommish letter Q is included here. It never appeared in an AF book until Time Paradox in 2008, so I had assumed that they hadn't bothered to make up a symbol for it until that time. But I guess not! They'd settled on what Q looked like at least as far back as 2003.

[jasonball34]

fowlfest 2023 day 1

[jasonball34]

Happy Birthday Holly!

[jasonball34]

YESSSS

Another Hartemis shipper

Agree with like literaly everything on this blog!!

Thanks! Yes, there are indeed a few Hartemis shippers on this site, but they stick to the shadows a lot, sadly. In my opinion, Hartemis really is the best and I for one am proud to support it with analysis, fanfics and memes haha

[jasonball34]

Hey Foaly, are you jealous that Artemis visited outer space before you did?

Foaly: Not really, since I've never felt the need to leave terra firma myself, I've seen to many sci fi movies.

But my drone missions are still decades ahead of human exploration, so.

[jasonball34]

‘Holly, let me look at you,’ he said again, holding her shoulders. 

Something in Artemis’s voice made Holly stop what she was doing and pay attention. This was not a tone Artemis Fowl used very often. It could almost class as tenderness.

[jasonball34]

I like how in Lost Colony, for the first 75% of the book Artemis doesn't do shit, and then for the last 25% he just kinda *activates* and goes sicko mode

[jasonball34]

After years of knowing about it but never knowing what was actually in it, I have finally acquired a copy of the rare 2008 UK promotional book "Who is Artemis Fowl?"

I was very excited to get my hands on it, as there was the possibility of exclusive content! To lay eyes on official AF content that I’ve never seen before, in 2022? Very exciting. Join me as I explore this tiny treasure!

First, a little background info on this thing can be found at: artemis-fowl.com/the-books/artemis-fowl-book/

So, it is quite small and thin, being a free promotional item included in a magazine. It's got 64 pages, and is roughly 4x7 inches in size (11x18 cm).

The bulk of the pages are devoted to short extracts from all 6 (at the time) Artemis Fowl books. It came out before Time Paradox released; it has a little blurb at the end advertising that book as releasing soon, in August 2008.

The extracts are: Book 1: The brief prologue, plus the scene where Artemis enters Angeline's bedroom and she has the mannequin of Timmy. Book 2: The scene right near the beginning where Artemis views the ransom video message on his laptop. Book 3: The scene where Holly agrees to heal Butler. Book 4: The scene after Holly saves Artemis from the hotel missile and they talk. Book 5: The opening scene where Artemis swaps fingers. Book 6: The exchange of money for lemur between Little Arty and Kronski in the leather souk, cutting off just as Holly and Artemis go in to intervene.

There is also a short extract from the original 2007 graphic novel. It's the first few pages of the Holly intro chapter, printed in black & white.

The extracts are all well and good, but I was of course most interested in the prospect of exclusive content. And there is indeed some stuff that isn't found anywhere else!

-A multiple-choice quiz on the characteristics of the different fairy species, with some very amusing wrong answers. -A list of Artemis' top 10 heroic moments (according to Eoin, I guess?). Not sure what the point of this is. I guess it’s just to hype up Time Paradox, since it wasn’t out yet but it’s included in the list. -A bit from Matt (of AFC website fame) saying why the series is so special, interspersed with other fan testimonials. -A promo for the "2008 LAFTA Awards" that was held on the AF website(?). Lol.

But the most exciting part of this little book, in my opinion? Official illustrations from Giovanni Rigano (graphic novel guy) are included in the Time Paradox extract! There are 3 illustrations, and they're exclusive to this little book. I had no idea that this existed. We now have official art of the lovely human being known as Damon Kronski!

I am including images of the book's exclusive content for your viewing pleasure, which I've never seen shared online before (though I could be wrong). Since this book is evidently rare and elusive, I think it's important that this stuff be accessible in the public record. There's nothing mind-blowing or earth-shattering here, but I think it's still pretty neat! Now we know what's in this thing!

(tap/click on an image to view full uncropped size)