itsdeathofabachelor
Egg
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Egg
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itsdeathofabachelor · 9 days ago
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Trans Jotaro where everything is the same except Polneraff makes a quip about a girl character standing beside Jotaro being on her period and Jotaro throws a chair at him thinking he was talking about him.
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itsdeathofabachelor · 1 month ago
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this has been sitting in my files for SO LONG cus i kinda hate it but here
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itsdeathofabachelor · 2 months ago
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Another thing I think about a lot about Jotaro is the fan art of his Fem version. Because in my head yeah he would have massive boobs as a girl but only because his shoulders are as wide as a linebackers and if they weren’t that big it would be anatomically incorrect.
Like, yeah, real nice tits. But also she’s got thighs bigger than two of YOUR legs put together. Yeah, she’s real blessed, but one of her hands can cover the entirety of your face. Like, if there was a stand that could gender swap the only difference between the male and female versions is the hair and the fact that FemJotaro doesnt use the word ‘bitch’ because of how much she’s been called it by loser men before she breaks their jaw. She is the exact same in meanness and ability to fight.
Also, she did duct tape her boobs down once because her mother insisted on bringing her to some store in Japan to get bras. Her 6’5 daughter. In Japan. Her mother was horrified when she walked in on her with a roll of duct tape between her teeth and half of one boob already taped down.
Her bra straps are always falling down and she hates it and never fixes them so when someone tells her to it’s an instant fight situation. Like Josuke’s hair.
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itsdeathofabachelor · 2 months ago
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The difference between Kakyoin and Jotaro is if Jotaro were a cat he wouldn’t notice his owner died until it’s feeding time and his bowl was still empty while Kakyoin would notice his owner smelled a bit off two hours before they passed and wouldn’t even wait until the body was cold to start eating them
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itsdeathofabachelor · 5 months ago
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Mothers in Jojo are weird. Sometimes you have Jolyne where the character’s mother just doesn’t matter at all. Sometimes you have Jotaro, Joseph, and Josuke, where their mother is a big deal. And then you have Giorno, whose mother is Jonathan.
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itsdeathofabachelor · 5 months ago
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Love it when artists depict Giorno like ‘Touched by the hand of god’ or ‘Giorno Goivanna and his fucking freak of nature stand GER’. And then show you the best art you’ve ever seen in both cases
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itsdeathofabachelor · 5 months ago
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itsdeathofabachelor · 5 months ago
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some cursed Jotaro and Kakyoin handshake memes i made
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itsdeathofabachelor · 6 months ago
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Ever think about how both Kakyoin and Jotaro died in water?
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itsdeathofabachelor · 6 months ago
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I love Turkey Tom or TomDark vids because I’ll get a notification halfway through my shift for a video called ‘Turbo Skeebi’s Super Rizz trafficking ring’ or ‘Furries and Fetishes, how low will you go for some toes?’ And I just have to continue on with my day until I get to go home and watch what the FUCK that’s about
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itsdeathofabachelor · 6 months ago
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redraw of smbc-comic's magnificent post
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itsdeathofabachelor · 6 months ago
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Jesus fathers day is hard
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itsdeathofabachelor · 7 months ago
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various jjba textpost things
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itsdeathofabachelor · 7 months ago
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Why is it whenever people make straight jotakak it's always Kakyoin who they make a girl
Why cant Kakyoin have a tall buff gf? Why are you like this?
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itsdeathofabachelor · 7 months ago
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Happy Pride month y'all !! 🤍🩷🩵🤎🖤❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
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itsdeathofabachelor · 7 months ago
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lmao
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itsdeathofabachelor · 7 months ago
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Ugh, childhood friends. . . Doomed by the narrative. . . The layers ughhhb like I love the idea of a Jotakak situation where both are reincarnated or if the events of stone ocean reset the original universe back on itself instead of making it a whole new thing— like, instead of it being completely changed it simply restarted, like re-reading a book. Nothing changes, and when you get to the end it’s the same.
But maybe after the billionth time this happens, after Jotaro drowns and everyone melts away in this big cosmic event, something does change. A little, very small thing. A rock moves two paces to the left, there’s a rainy day when there was supposed to be sun. Whatever. And Jotaro is in the same primary school with Kakyoin, introducing himself because he saw him make a pencil float and wanted to know how.
Kakyoin, being too young to have complete acceptance of his loneliness, asks him if he can tell him a secret.
And he does. And they become best friends. Things change. But the ending doesn’t. And then the story ends, and the book closes, and Jotaro is six, sitting with Kakyoin in the sandbox at recess. They’re promising they’ll get a big house on Mount Fuji, and they’ll stay up there forever.
“Will there be dogs?” Kakyoin asks. He knows Jotaro loves dogs.
“Yeah. And lots of big, super tall trees.” He knows how much Kakyoin loves climbing trees.
“Okay. Can I have the upstairs?”
“If we have one. . .” He thinks about it, “We can share. You’ll have the top bunk. So then it’s fair.”
And then he’s gripping Kakyoin’s hand in his as he watches the sun dip and dive about the sky like some neurotic dolphin. His head is tingly and the water against his back cold. Kakyoin isn’t holding his hand back.
He thinks the end of the world looks a lot like a spinning top, and he wonders what it would look like, seeing it from the branches of a big, super tall tree in a house on Mount Fuji. . .
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