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Hey Guys

[It's been so long since I've actually come back to say anything to anyone... And I want to apologize for that. Even if I don't have to.]

[I wanted to say that life has been busy for a while now. Working this job has really taken a lot out of me as a person. It can be pretty stressful, but I've grown to appreciate this job more over the years than I did when I was still just a "newbie". Though I have plenty of room for improvements.] [As for this blog. Well... I'm still open to some threads with people still open for communicating with me. I'm not going to press for it like I did a few years ago. It wouldn't be alright or professional to act like the same person I was all those years ago. A lot has changed since then.] [Please feel free to DM me with private chats if you have questions. Just give me time to answer them when I have the available time.]

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Sorry I haven't been active the last year. It's been pretty hectic, and been a mess for all of us here.

There's been a lot going on at home and at work that got me under some significant stress. I thought it wouldn't be okay, or really responsible of me, to just place that on anyone here, and I've been on hiatus for a good portion of the last year because of it. I'm going to try and see about getting back into the swing, but I can't guarantee that I will. I can't promise that I will come back at all either, but I at least want to try. Just not right now either, as things are still winding down on a few things. Some I can't disclose because of H.I.P.P.A. regulations and laws.

Anyway, I will see if the next coming months will be better, to also NOT burn myself out trying to be my own personal-people-pleaser, and to take things at my own pace.

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[So I know I haven’t really been active as of lately. I know a few are curious, but I think I need to at least explain it a bit to be fair.]

[Firstly, work has been really hectic as of late. With the C-19 going around a lot, work has been really pushing it lately with long hours and more days. On top of that, I work as a HCA (Home Care Aid). So the responsibility of work, and everything entitled to that, has been breathing down my neck. Which puts a lot of stress on me both physically and mentally.]

[Secondly, I needed to stop. I used to be on daily, but not have the motivation to continue any threads with you peeps. Sometimes I would have one open, but not know where to take it. Even though I really enjoyed talking with people, which is shameful of me. Sometimes it would be that I feared that I was overwhelming some of you guys. I didn’t want to say anything because I didn’t want to be an annoyance and would stop threads periodically to give “breathers.” In a way, a break.]

[Along with this: I want to be clear that I felt I was also wasting people’s time. It’s also one of the reasons that I stopped. Not because of anything anyone here as done, but more-so my own fears that I just wasn’t good enough for any of the people I was rp’ing with. That whatever I wasn’t doing my best, and was trying to, what I thought, please everybody. Nor did i feel that I was really “worthy” either. So a lot of self-doubt. Maybe this pause with help, but I don’t know...]

[So all in all, and I know I’m terrible at explanations. I’m going to taking a temporarily hiatus until things calm down on my end. I will check up every once in a while to see how things are going on the dash,but i won’t really be responding to much. If I happen to get anything in my box, I’ll answer to that person privately, but nothing publicly.]

[I hope that this little bubble will clear things up about what’s been happening lately. Maybe I’ll be on again once things have cooled down and I can actually breathe without being thrown a brick. Either way, I’m off. Hope everything works out for everyone!]

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pennsler

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Send me a ▲ for my muse's reaction to yours:

(You can find a random generator here. Or send the number of your choosing instead.)

attack hugging them

falling asleep on or next to them

giving them the best back massage they’ve ever had

holding their hand for the first time

hugging them from behind when they weren’t expecting it

hugging them way too tightly

kissing their forehead or cheek

kissing their neck

kissing them softly on the lips

playfully whacking them with a pillow

sneaking up behind them and blowing a raspberry on their neck

surprise kissing them

telling them they love them for the first time

tickling them

waking them up by holding them and playing with their hair

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misc sentence starters

“  i wish i knew how to talk about it.  ”   “  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ”   “  i don’t want to be alone anymore.  ”   “  i wish i could hate you.  ”  “  take a seat, we’re gonna be here a while.  ” “  i need you to trust me.  ”   “  i missed/miss you.  ”   “  she/he won’t listen to me.  ” “  let me do this for you. please.  ”   “  is there anything else you want to say to me?  ” “  tell me something happy.  ”   “  promise me.  ” “  i just want/wanted to help.  ”   “  let me explain.  ” “  i didn’t/don’t need you to understand, i just wanted/want you to support me.  ”   “  i’m on your side.  ” “  i’ve got your back, okay? ” “  please, tell me you have a plan.  ” “  stay with me tonight.  ” “  don’t go. please.  ”   “  i’ve been alone for so long i’m afraid i don’t know what it’s like not to be.  ”   “  talk to me.  ”   “  i did what i had to do.  ” “  we can’t keep going on like this.  ” “  i’m just tired.  ” “  i’m scared.  ” “  it’s okay to be afraid. fear can be good. use it.  ” “  it’s better to expect disappointment.  ” “  hope is dangerous.  ” “  i like seeing you smile.  ”   “  you look beautiful.  ”   “  be patient with her/him. they’re trying. ”   “  i’m trying my best and it’s not good enough. it’s never good enough. ” “  i’m starting to think i’m just fucked up.  ”   “  have a drink with me.  ” “  she/he is better off without me. but i guess that’s their choice.  ” “  you can’t dictate what’s best for someone else. ” “  can i help you?  ” “  i thought you’d like this.  ” “  do you wanna get out of here?  ” “  walk with me?  ” “  well, shit.  ”

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your muse is allowed to underestimate my muse 

your muse is allowed to disrespect my muse

your muse is allowed to provoke my muse

your muse is allowed to be a little asshole to my muse

and more – !!

So long as you, the mun, understand the consequences of your muse ticking off my muse your muse is allowed to be not nice to mine. Confrontation can be interesting and fun to rp! I welcome it! While you, the mun, should know better than to provoke my muse your muse might not and that’s okay! Mun does not equal muse and vice versa. When your muse provokes mine, disrespects mine, underestimates mine, I am trusting that even if your muse doesn’t know the consequences that you, the other mun, understand there are repercussions for your muse being an asshole.

you want your muse to be an ass to mine? that’s fine – just don’t whine when your muse doesn’t come out of it unscathed. 

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                                        WAIT JUST A MOMENT!                                                       — I CAN DROP MY VALUES!

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Inky hand

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Sickfic Prompts/Starters

“If you need something, just holler. Or cough really loudly if that’s easier.“

“If you mention food one more time, I swear I will eviscerate you.”

“We need to get you into a different shirt. You’ve already sweat through that one.”

“Please just don’t—don’t touch me.”

“What the hell are you doing on the bathroom floor at 3 in the morning?”

“I really can’t eat that right now. It’ll just come right back up.”

“I could probably fry an egg on your forehead. That’s how high your fever is right now.”

“Is that my sweater? I’m going to have to burn that thing now that you’ve contaminated it!”

“I know you’re exhausted, but you need to stay awake right now. I gotta get some medicine in you.”

“Please just sit down. You’re swaying on your feet right now.”

“I feel thoroughly disgusting.”

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“Liquid”

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Ask my muse about their worst memories.