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Before and after yep hes mustard gravy

Didnt smell good so i poured it down the drain without take a bite

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Crazy to think that seagulls existed before french fries.

[imagine-the-time]

[imagine-the-time]

At the company retreat, one extremely drunk girl asked what my pronouns were. (Eventually, it took her a while to word the question.) After the whole conversation was done, she goes- "YEAHHH GURL, Get on with--with THY bad self! See what I did?? They/them/thy."

I was almost holding back tears from trying not to laugh as I told her yes that's great you nailed it honey. Thank you very much I am feeling the love.

Anyway I've been assigned Thee/Thine at Supportive Drunk Girl

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[imagine-the-time]

WIZARD WRAPPED

You casted 1,039,627 spells this year

You pondered your orb for 985 hours

You targeted 109 spells at someone other than yourself - that’s in the top 6% of wizards!

You gained 5 familiars

Your favorite focus for spellcasting this year was a staff

Your cup size is H

Your most cast spell was Spontaneous Snack Generation and you used it 576 times this year.

Your most summoned object was Ketamine Ape at 69 summons

You trapped someone within an amulet for 10,000 years

You were unwittingly haunted by the evil skull twice

[imagine-the-time]

good god when the mr clean magic eraser hits the stove......

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www. the way the sun shines through the leaves dot com

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I shot my first turkey today!

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anybody else feel that being human is like being a long-time syndicated cartoon character watching the world get more complex while your own design stays the same until youre incongruous with the reality around you??

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Today I encountered an especially pathetic Italian greyhound. His owner told me that a gust of wind once blew him into a lake.

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Everybody say a silent prayer for me as I smash the head of baby Jesus clean off this statue in the name of art.