iloveyoublue

[iloveyoublue]

kazoo in the plague doctor mask 🤝 harmonica in the gas mask

[iloveyoublue]

"ten people I want to get to know better" tag game

ty for the tag @lilysrosier <3

last song: pretend you love me - baby bugs

favorite color: midnight blue

last movie: jeune et jolie

last tv show: almost embarrassed to admit this but i’ve spent the last three days binge watching every series of scooby doo i can find lmaoo

sweet/spicy/savory: sweet (or salty but that’s not an option)

relationship status: happily single

last google search: ao3 (the addiction stays strong)

current obsession: egyptian mythology, the human brain, journaling, obsessively googling plane tickets and travel plans to places i could never afford to go 😭

looking forward to: my first con on saturday!!

np tags: im on this account so sporadically i barely know anyone, so if you’ve ever interacted with any of my posts this is a tag for u specifically!!! come say hi i wanna know more about u!!

[iloveyoublue]

niche marauders character fans R I S E

i needed a new lip balm and GUESS WHAT I FOUND ON ETSY!!!!!!!!!! pandora rosier lip balm i am going insane

[iloveyoublue]

pandalily headcanons? ive been getting into violent/unsettling pandalily :3

omgg yes perfect... get ready for The Yappening

one of my personal faves is that lily is theee it girl of hogwarts like she is the brightest witch of her age, she is the people's princess and everybody admires her for being so driven and such a perfect role model, and she works herself to the bone to keep up that reputation. but in 6th year she meets pandora through an advanced potions class, and she drags lily to meet evan, and they all click IMMEDIATELY. lily is cruel and obsessive and she's a sweetie but omg she's actually so mean wtf?? petunia was her role model growing up and they're much more similar than lily wants people to know. the twins and lily become soo close and the gryffindors hate it 😭 mary and marlene keep giving them the stink eye because lily keeps coming back to the dorms with Something on her clothes and high out of her mind and she dyed blonde streaks into her hair to match them...

if you talk to one of them while the other is in the room and not by their side it's honestly unnerving bc u can just feel her eyes broing into ur head. they're always staring at each other!!! (the rosier twins speak in a language of inclined heads and shifts of eyes and lily wants so desperately to be included. she's like richard at the beginning of tsh absolutely yearning to be A Part Of The Group)

pandora has never been gifted with wand magic, preferring wordless and wandless, natures magic with her hands and dirt on her knees. she teaches lily how to conjure a storm with a breath and a handful of glass. she shares her craft that she's never shared with anyone, barely even her brother (who fashioned himself a wand before he even spoke; his first word was a dissection spell in latin) and lily, who has always been adept w potions, takes to it like a duck to water. even after school, lily would sometimes conjure lightning just to relish in the memories, throwing salt in the air to remind her of the sea and the beach and the house they were going to have on the cliffside. the one pandora's aunt built before she died. they had hung lavender on the inside of the door when they had left, was it still there? (it was, and it remained so.)

lily's smile gets sharper the longer she spends around them, she does end up leaving pandora though during 7th year when she refuses to pick a side in the war!! they dont talk for years and lily marries james but then you can pick this up in this post bc i dont wanna type all that again 😭 BUT if u want it to be canon compliant...pandora never succeeded and eventually blew herself up (blinding luna in one eye) while trying to bring lily back!

[iloveyoublue]

lily jane evans and her relationship to motherhood

[iloveyoublue]

When you find an old picture of us And you clear away the dust I hope you miss me sometimes When you see a frame that reminds you of me Would you remember the times Oh the times that we believed

[iloveyoublue]

Famous Last Words (An Ode To Eaters) - Ethel Cain

[iloveyoublue]

rosekiller fandom really is such a place bc necrophile evan is a semi-popular headcanon but as soon as you suggest either of them might be toxic within their interpersonal relationships ppl start getting squeamish and upset

[iloveyoublue]

[iloveyoublue]

actually i already posted this with everything i’m about to say in the tags but i’m having v strong emotions about this topic so i’m not gonna hide my words there anymore i wanna TALK about this shit

(side note i can't even describe the catharsis im feeling witnessing my fav tumblr creator openly speak on this issue and share my exact opinion, broke my inactivity streak to come back for this)

'the imagined possibility of your own pain should not be worth more to you than the lived reality of someone else's' LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!!!! so few of the arguments i see are from genuine survivors of the topics in question, and so many of the arguments i see are DIRECTLY SPEAKING FOR THESE PEOPLE??????

as someone living through a genocide in real time and more personally being a victim of dv it is WILD to me that murder/extreme violence and constant fear/ threat of bodily harm is outside someone's idea of normal… i live in ENGLAND where we have strict gun laws + are not in a war zone + are a relatively safe country and yet i walk down the street to see photos of victims of local police brutality or mugging gone wrong or targeted violence against women. my deepest sympathy to anyone currently living in america because i can’t imagine the terror you are feeling with current events

also i'm shocked that what this person has taken from the debates on the subject is ‘wow they're gonna FORCE me to consume this content they're gonna MAKE me read about this : (‘ like ???????????? genuinely how do you make that leap?????? i am seriously confused and more than a little concerned for them because do you really have that little respect for your own peace of mind? are you so glued to your technology that you've lost fundamental human instinct of: oh no this is bad my anxiety response go brrrr, okay let's not look at this anymore

dont get me wrong, i have so much love to everyone who DOESNT want to read this kind of fiction - im sending you all the support and care in the world, and if you see something that makes you uncomfortable that sucks man, seriously. have a nice cup of tea and a brain bleaching cat video, call a friend or a therapist or even journal your thoughts out. but that doesn't give you the right to censor other people's reading material. ESPECIALLY not victims'.

i am not intending to shame ANYONE; whether you are disgusted by this kind of content, or comforted by this kind of content. what i AM intending to do is draw attention to the rise of censorship and the direct link that has to modern day fascism

regarding your post about people feeling uncomfortable with reading certain topics i think its quite the opposite of them not realizing its not a material reality. it actually feels too close to home, a bit too real (considering we hear and read about cases every day) and you are aware that it happen to you everyday so it makes you feel uncomfortable to think about. on the other hand topics like murder, war crimes, etc. most people are alienated from them feeling safe that it wont happen to them (now thats a thing that happens only in stories) and reading about doesn't spark the same type of panic.

but also even if that wasn't the case.. what do you think its supposed to happen when somone is uncomfortable? just keep reading, shoving discomfort down their throat because of other people? Yes i understand that there are victims who have survived it and i will try my best to accommodate them and treat them in the way they want to and i will even swallow my discomfort down and read about the experience but that wont change anything. i will still be afraid of the possibility that will happen to me, i will still squirm when i hear about another case and then try to avoid in the places where i go to enjoy myself (like ao3)

also in terms of victims i imagine that as much as there are some who would like to read and write about their experience there are other who would want to distance themselves from the memory. Isn't it just preference at the end of day. why do people must be guilt tripped to to read something they dont want to.

😭 this is of the most braindead annoying messages i’ve ever received on here i’m actually almost impressed. fucking obviously i am not suggesting that CSA victims read triggering material on purpose that would be insane (💀). but my post wasn’t about victims! i was in fact complaining about emptyhead non-survivors who say things precisely like this!

1. describing murder and war crimes as literally “now that’s something that only happens in stories!” is such a glaring indictment of your worldview… these things are realities for everyone living outside of the imperial core. even within the west, if you’re a transwoman of color, if you’re a DV victim, an addict, an unhoused person, or poc and interacting with police– you are not alienated from extreme violence! it’s very real & present experience! for you to say that reading about systematized violence is “safer” because it’s “less real” especially when we are in the middle of a genocide is literally stomach churning 😭. you should go donate to winter relief for gaza and never speak up again

2. not everything is about you! perhaps this is harsh but i do believe that if you haven’t experienced csa/sa (or been close to the issue), then reading about it cannot be “triggering” to you in the same way it would be for, say, someone with actual csa ptsd. you might feel uncomfortable, but you are not in danger of having a trauma response. sensitivity is beautiful, but i think in moments like these you could stand to be a little bit braver, and a little bit more sturdy. nothing fictional can hurt you. feeling discomfort and fear at the contents of a story is not the same as real pain- it is healthy to practice experiencing these emotions through the safe medium of fiction.

so much of this ask is painfully egotistic… but in a naive, almost endearing sort of way? you dismiss others experiences with the wave of a hand: “yes victims but what about my SQUIRMING”, “but what about the mere possibility it might happen to ME”! i want to remind you that i am a csa survivor complaining about the difficulty of discussing these subjects with non-survivors, and you are a non-survivor inserting yourself into this space to ask “what about MY discomfort?”…. well! terrible, violent, undoingly horrific events happen every day! it is not helpful to act like victims of SA are somehow uniquely traumatized in some special, singularly awful way. no “type” of trauma is inherently worse than any another. people survive and recover from all kinds of experiences, and i find this beautiful & empowering, and frequently the subject of great art. it is worth confronting your own personal discomfort (💀) with that art in order to sit with and face the lived reality of those experiences. doing so will help you develop a more complex and empathetic worldview.

not everything is about you! 🙂‍↕️ the imagined possibility of your own pain should not be worth more to you than the lived reality of someone else’s. this ask was exhausting let’s all read averno by louise gluck to calm down

[iloveyoublue]

genuinely one of my least favorite things ever is when people moral panic over sexual abuse and incest and csa in fiction and/or act like it’s somehow inherently worse than all other types of traumatic experience, i.e. “x character is my favorite war criminal but reading or writing about pedophilic abuse is TOO FAR”. especially when it’s about, like, being fine with all other content warnings but being unwilling to read lolita or death in venice or w/e. this mentality is wrong for a lot of reasons but the most personally vexing is how clearly you can tell that pedophilic abuse is just not a material reality for these people! its something which only happens in fiction and news stories, and its too shocking to even hear about, etc. like. not only is this profoundly naive (and glaringly privileged) but it alienates survivors!

god knows its already difficult enough to get over something that happened to you but imagine when it’s treated like the Singularly Bad Thing so ontologically horrific & traumatic that it can’t even be READ about. especially when you already feel uniquely damaged and broken <- this rhetoric is so hurtful! i don’t think people realize this is the exact message they’re sending with that sentiment. 💀 i’m so sorry you can’t even hear about rape without feeling uncomfortable but did you consider that thousands of women and children face that reality every day. and survive. and deserve to be able to read & write about their experiences freely.

[iloveyoublue]

i am made of the ruthlessness of the waves, and the water’s devotion to the moon. i have sea foam in my veins and sharp salt on my tongue.

[iloveyoublue]

what if i gnawed on your ribcage like a mouse and then when you cried i cried and bled pieces of my soul inbetween your bones to fill the cracks left by my teeth and my soul was gold like ichor and we made artwork far more glorious than the gods could ever divine for themselves what about that

[iloveyoublue]

i was thinking about writing a rosestarkillerchaser fic about reg getting pregnant but not knowing if james barty or evan was the father

should i do it

y e s you absolutely should

give me all the angst i beg, i want him refusing to tell any of them while trying desperately to hide all the signs (obviously failing miserably) and them slowwwly finding out and all of that cute fluffy hurt/comfort yesyesyes

pregnancy fics aren’t usually my vibe but i think ur onto something anon, if u tag me afterwards or send me the link or something i will literally love you forever

(honestly this goes for anyone writing rosestarkillerchaser, send me all the good fics i need them injected into my veins)

[iloveyoublue]

im just saying that barty crouch jr covered in an alarming amount of blood and smoking a cigarette would solve a lot of problems

[iloveyoublue]

okay more headcannons

evan’s is on his hipbone where it’s nice and hidden (and perpetually covered in hickeys), barty is a fucking maniac who got his right on his neck

barty will forever be using ‘let me see your tattoo rosie?’ as an excuse to get on his knees without being obviously desperate

evan subtly bares his teeth at anyone who comes too close to barty, daring them to make the connection to the mark on barty’s neck even when evan is the other side of the room

the alleged reason barty got his tattoo on his neck is because he likes to show off evan’s claim on him, but they both know it’s the same reason barty nicknamed evan ‘little vampire’; because it’s evan’s favourite place to bite

they did it themselves, stick and poke style, and barty wanted to immediately bite down and stick the needle in (WHICH: BAD!!!! DONT DELIBERATELY BREAK SKIN NEAR HUMAN MOUTH GERMS!!!!!!) but little dissection freak evan rosier had enough sense to know that was a stupid idea and so (although he really wanted to just say fuck it) they cleaned the mark with antiseptic wipes and used a pen to draw in the lines first

evan still def got off on the whole sterilisation process tho, barty’s all wriggling and squirming, trying to buck his hips up into the air while evan’s pinning him down, needle in hand, all clinically detached even tho he’s hard in his jeans

barty and evan have eachothers bite marks tattooed on their bodies

[iloveyoublue]

barty and evan have eachothers bite marks tattooed on their bodies