if-peter-parker-was-a-girl

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

One of my campers told me she wished our summer camp was more like camp half-blood, me too kid, me too

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

Ah yes, hello stress migraines, my old friend

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

You want to know how I know this pandemic has gone on to long?? Someone from middle school just texted me...I’m going to grad school in the fall

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

Professors,

I would like to remind you we are in a pandemic still. 

Sincerely,

all college students who have no semblance of mental health remaining

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

Dating with OCD rant

I’m going to apologize beforehand because this might get long-winded and rant-y but I just had to get this off my chest, and kinda liked the anonymity of Tumblr to do it...so yeah 

So I recently went on a first date with a guy (needless to say it was terrible). Just some information in the simplest way to explain, I have OCD which for me makes it hard to eat out because I deal with intrusive thoughts dealing with food and stuff making me sick or worse, along with some other nonfood issues that don't matter here. 

We were planning the date and I mentioned the OCD stuff just to be like “hey please don’t be offended if I don’t eat anything or if I end up not being able to eat a lot and bring it home/maybe do something not involving eating instead.” Then he questioned me and was like “oh that's not OCD, that’s like your room has to be super clean or if I move a pencil you’ll go crazy.” I figured maybe he’s only seen OCD represented in movies and I brushed it off (bad mistake) and was like “yeah there's a lot more to it than that.” We switched topics and all was well. 

Because of covid, most restaurants here are take out/we didn’t feel comfortable eating in one, so we took the food back to my place. I have a college apartment so we went to my room to watch tv and eat. I did clean my room, but since it is small it is not immaculate but it is decently tidy, with maybe a few things out of place that I couldn't get to that day. He looked around as goes “see I told you that you don't have OCD, because if you really did your room wouldn't look like this.” I was like yeah I do, but its a different form of OCD, and he’s trying to like go through my entire mental health history. He started trying to insinuate that I was making up my OCD because I thought it was “cute and quirky.” Ummmmmmm no sir, I don't think my intrusive thoughts are cute and quirky at all because I wouldn’t wish intrusive thoughts of any kind on anyone, nor would I ever want to fake a mental illness for “quirkiness.” Also I shouldn't have to prove my medical history to anyone. 

Basically, long story short boy thought I was faking my OCD and decided that he knew more about OCD than someone diagnosed with it. This was also the least bad thing to happen that night if that shows how the night went. I just wish that OCD was represented better in media, so that people stop being like “sorry im so ocd about stuff like this” and understand that it’s not some cute mental health issue. 

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

He definitely tried to make a ton of friends at first. He went to to all the parties, tried to make it seem like he had a normal life and didn't move around every two weeks. Every time he meets someone from a high school he attended, he hopes they don't recognize the name Winchester and connect him to the weird kid that fell asleep in the back of the class mumbling something about vamps, after he stayed up all night doing research for his dad and Dean. 

After the first two weeks, when all the new excitement of being free for the first time dies down, Sam realizes how much all the socializing and faking his past exhausts him. He starts to alienate himself from most of the friends he made those first few weeks and only remains active in one club. But even those friends he has to keep at a distance because he can’t explain his entire life. 

I think his roommate wouldn't be too weirded out, Sam kept the bare minimum just to keep himself safe. Once you know what he knows, it can’t be forgotten. Everything is pretty well hidden so no awkward questions from the RA or roommates looking around his stuff to borrow a pen. Maybe the roommate sees the salt Sam keeps in his nightstand drawer, but just assumes that he likes more salt than what the dining hall provides. The absence of decorations or belongings, his roommate chalks up to the fact he doesn’t have much or is on his own considering no family came to move him in. 

He learned how to blend in quickly and everyone thinks he’s a normal enough guy. No one questions how he got so good at Latin or the random facts he can recall in Religion Studies, because who didn't study a dead language for the SATs to get into Stanford or have some random niche interest. 

Ok just thinking about Sam having to do normal college things in Stanford is just...a lot. Especially during his first semester:

Sam at orientation, alone and fresh off of being disowned, trying his absolute best to enjoy the experience in any way he can.

Sam getting a room (his own room! For at least a year!) and a roommate and a built-in community in the dorm. He gets to be part of a larger group for the first time ever.

Sam in class/dorm icebreakers, nervously trying to figure out normal facts about himself to say in two truths and a lie

(He decides to go with “I’ve visited every state in the continental US” and “I have an older brother”)

Sam signing up for classes, seeing all the options and tearing up because he wants to take all of them and he’s so overwhelmed at the freedom to do so.

Sam meeting with his academic advisor, treats it like a research hunt and takes copious notes. The advisor just thinks he’s an overachiever (which is also true).

Sam being terrified to attend any social events in his dorm for a few days (all those people!) but slowly he starts attending movie nights and trivia nights and loves it so much that he joins every club he finds vaguely interesting during his first semester.

He considers joining an academic fraternity but ultimately decides against it.

Sam taking full advantage of a fully stocked dining hall and eating the healthiest options possible (because he can).

Sam showing up to his first day of classes with just a beat up notebook and 2 pens, so excited to be there that his lack of things doesn’t bother him.

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

I probably should also mention the fact that this happened after he learned I don't own any sort of gaming console, so now he thinks I’m broke. 

My student apparently thinks I have children and he gifted me a box FILLED with pencils to bring home to them. I’m a college student who thinks pop-tarts are a balanced breakfast??????

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

My student apparently thinks I have children and he gifted me a box FILLED with pencils to bring home to them. I'm a college student who thinks pop-tarts are a balanced breakfast?????? I definitely am not responsible for children 24/7

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

Me: I have one more paper then I’m done with the semester 

Brain: You’re done! No work! Netflix!

Me: alright cool!

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

You want me to write a 10 page paper: sure no problem 

You want me to write a short tiny conclusion to that same paper: Now we’ve got problems

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

They are always in sport mode and covered in jibbitz 

Jack Kline wears crocs and no one can convince me otherwise

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

Jack Kline wears crocs and no one can convince me otherwise

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

My dad told the Alexa to play a “Discovery playlist” so like a random assortment of songs based on music taste, and it PLAYS CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON. Alexa read the room please, 7:10am while I’m trying to do schoolwork is not the time 

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

SPN 15x18

So... Supernatural fandom, how's everyone doing tonight after 15x18? Cause I am not ok right now

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

NOT EILEEN

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

I need someone in my life to tell me that 2 am is not the best time to plan big life changes, please and thank you

[if-peter-parker-was-a-girl]

they said sam had been at college for two years TWICE in like the first 3 episodes kripke what is the truth