i-desiredeath

[i-desiredeath]

X : Citations

“Just tell me where you’re at by the time I’ve got my score.”

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ㅤ➤ ◦  INSERTING CITATION

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References > Insert Citation > Add New Source... > Manage Source.

TO INSERT BIBLIOGRAPHY

References > Bibliography > Insert Bibliography.

TO EDIT BIBLIOGRAPHY

Manage Source > click one of many items you put in the Current List > Delete > Update the bibliography after editing.

TO ADD ANOTHER IN THE BIBLIOGRAPHY

Manage Source > click one of many items you put in the Master List > click Copy > Update the bibliography after editing.

TO CHANGE THE STYLE IN THE BIBLIOGRAPHY

Click Style > choose one.

[i-desiredeath]

IX : Picture List & Table

Requirement: Caption.

Caption for picture: Under the picture.

Caption for table: Above the table.

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ㅤ➤ ◦  INSERTING CAPTIONS

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References > Insert Table of Figures > Caption Label: customise it as you like.

Reminder: Never forget to right-click and UPDATE ENTIRE FIELD of the main content after editing.

[i-desiredeath]

VIII : Contents

“When creating a table of contents, MsWord has some helpful features.”

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ㅤ➤ ◦  CREATING TABLE OF CONTENTS

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References > Table of Contents > Insert New Table of Contents.

General: Formats > Formal.

Show Levels: Customise.

Options: Scroll for No Spacing > type 1.

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ㅤ➤ ◦  UPDATE FIELD

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Right click on the table of contents > click either Update page numbers only or Update entire table.

[i-desiredeath]

VII : Multilevel List

“If you have ever wrestled with numbering in Microsoft Word, you’re not alone! Numbering, particularly for headings, can generate more frustration than almost any other feature.”

       Multilevel (or hierarchical) numbering allows you to create a more complex structure than a simple list. You can apply it to paragraphs or to headings.

       Applying it to normal paragraph text is fairly straightforward. Click where the list is to begin and in the Paragraph group, click on the down arrow at Multilevel List, then choose a layout from the library. Press [Tab] or [Shift + Tab] to change levels (or click the Decrease Indent  and Increase Indent buttons).

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ㅤ➤ ◦  CREATING NUMBERED HEADINGS

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       First, use Word’s built-in heading styles, and second, set up your numbering scheme before you begin so you don’t have to make changes to it as you are working.

Step 1. IF you are making changes to the style from the Modify Style dialog box, do NOT use Paragraph on the Format menu to change tab or indentation settings.

Step 2. Type your top level heading, and then with the cursor in the heading, click on the style Heading 1 in the Styles pane to apply it; Home > Multilevel List > Paragraph to display the List Library.

Choose a layout that includes the Heading style names in the thumbnail. If the numbering format is not quite how you want it, you can modify it later.

Step 3. Click down the Multilevel List > Define New Multilevel List.

In the Define New Multilevel List dialog box, click More button to see all the options. NOTE that you can make changes to all levels of your list in one operation without exiting this dialog box; simply select the level to edit in the box on the left.

In the Number Format section, Enter formatting for number box shows you how the numbering will look for the level selected. To use a different format, click on the down arrow at Number style for this level and choose from the list.

Step 4. Styles (home, styles) > choose Heading 1/Heading 2/Heading 3 to save time.

“At this point, I swear, I’m getting tired. Forgive me, dear kind Sir, if the posts from now forth shall appear to have been ー severely ー shortened.”

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ㅤ➤ ◦  CHANGING THE STYLE

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       Styles (home, styles) > right click and Modify.

FORMAL ー HEADING 1

Font: Times New Roman.

Size: 14.

Alignment: Centre.

Spacing: 1,5.

Font Colour: Black. (Automatic)

FORMAL ー HEADING 2

Font: Times New Roman.

Size: 12.

Alignment: Justify.

Spacing: 1,5.

Font Colour: Black. (Automatic)

In case needed: Increase Indent. (Modify > Increase Indent)

[i-desiredeath]

VI : Page Number

“Adding page numbers to all pages in a Word document is easy and simple for you, but how about adding different formats of page numbers to certain pages?”

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ㅤ➤ ◦  CERTAIN PAGE RANGES

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       Firstly, you need to insert section breaks to divide the whole document into three sections.

Step 1. Put the cursor at the end of the first page, then click Page Layout > Breaks > Next Page.

Step 2. Put the cursor at the end of the third page, and click Page Layout > Breaks > Next Page.

Step 3. Click Home > Show/Hide Editing Marks to show the section breaks in document.

You can see the document has been divided into three sections (Section 1ーPage 1; Section 2ーPage 2-3; Section 3ーPage 4-5). Now, you can begin to add page numbers to page 2 and page 3.

Step 4. Double click at the top area of Page 2 to activate the Header and then click Design and uncheck Link to Previous.

Step 5. Go back and click on the top of the Page 2 and click Insert > Page Number.

Select a type of page number from Top of Page and Bottom of Page section under Page Number drop-down menu.

Step 6. Double click the contents of the document or click Design > Close Header and Footer to close the header.

Now, the page numbers are only inserted to Page 2 and Page 3.

Tip: If you want to add page numbers to Pages 2-3 and Page 6-8, just need to insert three section breaks to divide the document into four sections (Page 1, Page 2-3, Page 4-5 and Page 6-8) then uncheck Link to Previous in Section 2 and Section 4.

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ㅤ➤ ◦  DIFFERENT FORMATS

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       First, divide the document into page ranges by using section break.

Step 1. Put the cursor at the end of the first range and click Page Layout > Breaks > Next Page.

Step 2. Repeat step 1 to insert section breaks into the end of each range.

Step 3. Double click at the top area of the second range to show the Header and Footer, then click Design and uncheck Link to Previous.

Step 4. Put the cursor at the top area of the first page, and click Insert > Page Number, specify a format you need from the drop-down list, and the page number is inserted.

Step 5. Put the cursor at the start of the second section, and click Insert > Page Number, specify another format you need from the drop down list.

You can see the different formats of page numbers are inserted into the page ranges.

[i-desiredeath]

V : Untitled

“I will not let myself become tired. I’ll jump into my story even though it should cut my face to pieces.”

How pretty and earnest he is there.

       I simply do not believe the conclusions I have drawn from my present condition, which has already lasted almost a year, my condition is too serious for that. Indeed, I don’t even know whether I can say that it’s not a new condition. My real opinion, however, is that is condition is new ー I have had similar ones, but never one like this.

       It is as if I were made of stone, as if I were my own tombstone, there is no loophole for doubt or for faith, for love or repugnance, for courage or anxiety, in particular or in general, only a vague hope lives on, but no better than the inscriptions on tombstones. Almost every word I write jars against the next, I hear the consonants rub leadenly against each other and the vowels sing an accompaniment like Negroes in a minstrel show.

       My doubt circle around every word, I see them before I see the word, but what then; I do not see the word at all, I invent it.

       Of course, that wouldn’t be the greatest misfortune, only I ought to be able to invent words capable of blowing the odor of corpses in a direction other than straight into mine and the reader’s face.

       When I sit down at the desk, I feel no better than someone who falls and breaks both legs in the middle of the traffic of the Place de l’Opéra. All the carriages, despite their noises, press silently from all directions in all directions, but that man’s pain keeps better order than the police; he closes his eyes and empties the Place and the streets without the carriage having to turn about.

       The great commotion hurts him, for he is really an obstruction to traffic, but the emptiness is no less sad, for it unshackles his real pain.

       I won’t give up the diary again. I must hold on there, it is the only place I can.

       I would gladly explain the feeling of happiness which, like now, I have within me from time to time. It is really something effervescent that fills me completely with a light, pleasant quiver and that persuade me of the existence of abilities of whose nonexistence I can convince myself with complete certainty at any moment, even now.

[i-desiredeath]

IV : Untitled

“Externally, I look like everybody else; have legs, body and head, trousers, coat and hat, they put me through a thorough course of gymnastics and if I have nevertheless remained rather short and weak, that just could not be helped.”

Besides, I am agreeable to many people, even young girls, and those to whom I am not agreeable still find me bearable.

       It is reported, and we are inclined to believe it, that when men are in danger they have no consideration even for beautiful strange women; they shove them against walls, shove them with head and hands, knees and elbows, if these women happen only to be in the way of their flight from the burning theater. At this point, our chattering women fall silent, their endless talking reaches a verb and period, their eyebrows rise out of their resting places, the rhythmic movement of their thighs and hips is interrupted; into their mouths, only loosely closed by fear, more air than usual enters and their cheeks seem a little puffed out.

       “You,” I said, and gave him a little shove with my knee (at this sudden utterance, some saliva flew from my mouth as an evil omen), “don’t fall asleep!”

       “I’m not falling asleep,” he answered, and shook his head while opening his eyes. “If I were to fall asleep, how could I guard you then? And don’t I have to do that? Isn’t that why you grabbed hold of me then in front of the church? Yes, it was a long time ago, we know it, just leave your watch in your pocket.”

       “It’s really very late,” I said. I had to smile a little and in order to conceal it, I looked intently into the house.

       I was beautiful in the early days, for this dissolution takes place as an apotheosis, in which everything that holds us to life flies away, but even in flying away illumines us for the last time with its human light. So, I stand before my bachelor and most probably, he loves me for it, but without himself really knowing why.

         Occasionally, his words seem to indicate that he knows himself thoroughly, that he knows whom he has before him and that he may therefore allow himself anything.

       No, it is not so, however.

       He would rather meet everyone this same way, for he can live only as a hermit or a parasite. He is a hermit only by compulsion, once this compulsion is overcome by forces unknown to him, at once he is a parasite who behaves insolently whenever he possibly can.

       Of course, nothing in the world can save him any longer and so his conduct can make one think of the corpse of a drowned man which, borne to the surface by some current, bumps against a tired swimmer, lays its hands upon him and would like to hold on. The corpse does not come alive, indeed is not even saved, but it can pull the man down.

[i-desiredeath]

III : Untitled

“If you actually did make them hear and speak, then your ears would only hum with counter reproaches, for people take the conviction of the venerability of the dead along with them into the beyond and uphold it ten times as much from there.”

After all, it’s closest to them, and again our ears would hum.

       How many days have again gone silently by? Have I not even the resolution to take this pen-holder, this piece of wood, in my hand every day?

       I really think I do not. I row, ride, swim, lie in the sun. Therefore, my calves are good, my thighs not bad, my belly will muster, but my chest is very shabby.

       When I think about it, I must say that my education has done me great harm in some respects I was not, as a matter of fact, educated in any out-of-the-way place, in a ruin say, in the mountains ー something against which in fact I couldn’t have brought myself to a word of reproach.

       In spite of the risk of having the entire roster of my former teachers not understand this, I should prefer most of all to have been such a little dweller in the ruins, burnt by the sun which would have shone for me there on the tepid ivy between the remains on every side; even though I might have been weak at first under the pressure of my good qualities, which would have grown tall in me with the might of weeds.

       Often I think it’s over and then I always have to say that my education has done me great harm in some ways. Thus reproach is directed against a multitude of people, indeed, they stand here together and, as in old group photographs, they do not know what to do about each other, it simply does not occur to them to lower their eyes, and out of anticipation, they do not dare smile.

       Among them are my parents, several relatives, several teachers, a certain particular cook, several girls at dancing school, several visitors to our house in earlier times, several writers, a swimming teacher, a ticket-seller, a school inspector, then some people that I met only once on the street, and others that I just cannot recall and those whom I shall never again recall, and those, finally, whose instruction, being somehow distracted at the time, I did not notice at all; in short, there are so many that one must take care not to name anyone twice.

       And I address my reproach to them all, introduce them to one another this way, but tolerate no contradiction.

       For honestly, I have borne enough contradictions already, and since most of them have refuted me, all I can do is include these refutations, too, in my reproach, and say that aside from my education, these refutations have also done me great harm in some respects.

       Does one suspect, perhaps, that I was educated in some out-of-the-way place? No, I was educated in the middle of the city, in the middle of the city. Not, for example, in a ruin in the mountains or beside the lake.

       My reproach had until now covered my parents and their retinue and made them gray, but now they easily push it aside and smile.

[i-desiredeath]

II : Untitled

“If he should forever ah-sk me.” The ah, released from the sentence, flew off like a ball on the meadow.

The onlookers go rigid when the train goes past.

       His gravity is the death of me. His head in its collars, his hair arranged immovably on his skull, the muscles of his jowls below, tensed in their places ー are the woods still there? The woods were still there. But hardly had my glance gone ten steps farther when I left off, again caught up in the tedious conversation.

       In the dark woods, on the sodden ground, I found my way only by the whiteness of his collar.

       I write this very decidedly out of despair over my body and over a future with this body.

       When despair shows itself so definitely, is so tied to its object, so pent up, as in a soldier who covers a retreat and thus lets himself to be torn to pieces, then it is not true despair. True despair overreaches its goal immediately and always:

       Do you despair?

       Yes? You despair?

       You run away? Want to hide?

       Finally, after five months of my life during which I could write nothing that would have satisfied me, and for which no power will compensate me, though all were under obligation to do so, it occurs to me to talk to myself again. Whenever I really questioned myself, there was always a response forthcoming, there was always something in me to catch fire, in this heap of straw that I have been for five months and whose fate, it seems, is to be set afire during the summer and consumed more swiftly than the onlooker can blink his eyes.

       My condition is not unhappiness, but it is also not happiness, not indifference, not weakness, not fatigue, not another interest ー so, what is it, then? Without knowing the reason for it, I believe I understand the latter.

       All those things, that is to say, those things which occur to me, occur to me not from the root up but rather only from somewhere about their middle. Let someone then attempt to seize them, let someone attempt to seize a blade of grass and hold it fast to it when it begins to grow only from the middle.

       Therefore, I went outside myself, fought in the air amid the mist, and, worst of all, no one noticed that I was even insolent to my companions; a piece of insolence as such, and had to be, and had to assume the proper manner for it and the responsibility, but the worst was when one of my acquaintances took this insolence not even as the indication of a personality but rather as the personality itself, called my attention to my insolence and admired it.

       Why don’t I stay within myself?

       To be sure, I now say to myself:

       “Look, the world submits to your blows, the conductor and the person introduced to you remained undisturbed, as you left, the latter even said goodbye. But that means nothing. You can achieve aside from this, in your circle?”

       To this appeal, I answer only:

       “I too, would rather submit to blows within the circle than myself deal the blows outside it ー but where the devil is this circle? For a time, indeed, I did see it lying on the earth, as if sprayed in lime, but now it just sort of hovers about me, indeed, does not even hover.”

[i-desiredeath]

I : Untitled

“In parting from you now, this much let me avow; you are not wrong, who deem that my days have been a dream. Yet if hope has flown away in a night, or in a day; in a vision, or in none; is it therefore less gone?”

All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.

       I wandered lonely as a cloud that floats on high o’er vales and hills. When all at once I saw a crowd, a host, of golden daffodils; beside the lake, beneath the trees; fluttering and dancing in the breeze. Continuous as the stars that shine and twinkle on the milky way, they stretched in never-ending line along the margin of a bay: ten thousand saw I at a glance, testing their heads in sprightly dance.

       The waves beside them danced, but they outdid the sparkling leaves in glee; a poet could not be but gay, in such a jocund company! I gazed ー and gazed ー but little thought:

“For oft, when on my couch I live vacant or pensive mood, they flash upon that inward eye which is a bliss of solitude; and then my heart with pleasure fills and dances with the daffodils.”

       I went down to the river, I set down on the bank. I tried to think but couldn’t, so I jumped in and sank.

       I came up once and hollered. I came up twice and cried. If that water hadn’t a-been so cold, I might have sunk and died.

       But it was cold in that water! It was cold!

       So, since I’m still here; livin’ the life, I guess I’ll live on. I could have died for love ー but for livin’ I was born. Though you may hear me holler and you may see me cry, I’ll be dogged, sweet baby, if you gonna see me die.

       Life is fine, fine as wine! Life is fine.

       I stand amid the roar of a surf-tormented shore, and I hold within my hand grains of the golden sand ー how few. Yet how they creep through my fingers to the deep while I weep ... while I weep!

       Dear God! Can I not grasp them with a tighter grasp? Can I not save one from the pitiless wave?

       Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream?

[i-desiredeath]

Reminisce Your Gist Nevermore

“I never meant to call you out. As you can see here, I’ve been very busy.”

What’s with that look? Do you really think I’m taking this too far? All you have to do is swear that you’ll be true and I’ll let you go right now.

Just don’t lie.

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ㅤ➤ ◦  BASIC

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Name: Lachlan Kusunoki-Shaffer.

Nicknames: La Lachlan (pun of La La Land), Kusu, Shaffer.

Alias:

“Our Local Shaffer-ing Boy.”

“The Raven.”

Age: 28 years old.

Gender: Male.

Sexuality: Aromantic Demisexual.

Date of Birth: 22 December.

Place of Birth: Horsham, Sussex, England.

Current Residence: Primordial Avenue, Greenville.

Demonym: British.

Species: Human. (doubted)

Occupation: Police investigator, Lord Edgar’s apprentice. (no longer)

Rank: Junior investigator.

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ㅤ➤ ◦  PERSONALITY

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Primary Traits:

Virtues:

Skills:

Vices:

Flaws:

Chronic Backstabbing Disorder

Constantly betrays others.

What You Are in the Dark

Fails to live up to his principles when nobody is watching.

Paste Eater

Eats things that are not intended to be food, often poisoning himself in the process.

Wild Card

Unreliable, untrustworthy and traitorous.

Sore Loser

Can't take a loss, even if it was fair and square.

Sociopathic “Hero”

Shaffer is a “hero” who lacks empathy for others and acts in villain-ish ways when fighting villains.

Personality Type:

INFJ ; The Protector

Quietly forceful, original, and sensitive.

Tend to stick to things until he is done.

Extremely intuitive about people, and concerned for their feelings.

Well-developed value systems which Shaffer strictly adheres to.

Well-respected for his perseverance in doing the right thing.

Likely to be individualistic, rather than leading or following.

Archetypes:

The Outcast

The lonely outsider; Shaffer desperately wants to belong to someone.

Tortured and unforgiving, he has been set off from others, and usually for good cause. He craves redemption, but is willing to gain it by sacrificing others. Waste no sympathy on himーhe’ll have none for you.

Masquerader

Shaffer pretends to be someone (or something) he’s not.

Likes & Dislikes:

Fears:

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ㅤ➤ ◦  HISTORY

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Family Life:

Shaffer was born on 22 December at Broadbridge Heath, near Horsham, West Sussex, England. He was the youngest legitimate son of Sir Percival Shaffer; a Whig Member of Parliament for Horsham and Shoreham, and his wife, Mitsuru Kusunoki, a Japanese landowner.

He had two older brothers and two older sisters. Shaffer received his early education at home, tutored by the Reverend Yehezkiel Evans of nearby church.

It was a happy and contented childhood spent largely in country pursuits such as fishing and hunting.

Education:

Shaffer used to enter Ashbourne College, where he fared poorly, and was subjected to an almost daily mob torment at around noon by older boys, who aptly called these incidents “Shaffer-baits.” Surrounded, the young Shaffer would have his books torn from his hands and his clothes pulled at and torn until he cried out madly in his high-pitched “cracked soprano” of a voice.

Shaffer possessed a keen interest in science at Ashbourne, which he would often apply to cause a surprising amount of mischief for a boy considered to be so sensible. His friends were particularly amused when his gentlemanly tutor, Mr. Rickman, in attempting to enter his room, was alarmed at the noise of the electric shocks, despite Shaffer’s dutiful protestations.

He then matriculated at University College, Oxford. Rumour has it that Shaffer attended only one lecture while at Oxford, but frequently read sixteen hours a day.

Years later, Shaffer anonymously published an article called “Objections of Gates” which was brought to the attention of the university administration and even Lord Edgar himself, so he was called to appear before the College’s fellows, including the Gatekeeper, Zürau and the Destroyer-of-All, Séamus. Shaffer’s refusal to repudiate the authorship of the article resulted in his expulsion from Oxford, along with his friend; Vsevolod Kokorev.

Shaffer was given the choice to be reinstated after his father intervened, on the condition that he would have to serve as Lord Edgar’s new apprentice, which Shaffer hesitantly accepted.

...is still constructing.

Accomplishments:

Social Justice

Shaffer was a strong advocate for social justice for the “lower classes.” He witnessed many of the same mistreatments occurring in the domestication and slaughtering of animals, and he became a fighter for the rights of all living creatures that he saw being treated unjustly.

The Raven Transformation

Shaffer can transform himself into a gigantic raven, with eyes of a black cat; bright, yellow eyes, without losing 95% of his sanity and consciousness. This is one of many results of being the apprentice of Lord Edgar along with Zürau and Séamus.

...is still constructing.

Regrets:

Accepting senseless critics, saying that he was a narcissist and a dilettante who had no serious intellectual position either as a student or Lord Edgar’s apprentice, whose longer poems were not worth study.

Secrets:

“Some things are better left unknown.”

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ㅤ➤ ◦  RELATIONSHIP

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Parents:

Sir Percival Shaffer

“There can’t be winners without losers, Dad. So, reallyーyou’re doing the world a favor.”

Mitsuru Kusunoki-Shaffer

“Resist abusing your kids, Mum. They can do all your chores for you.”

Siblings:

Sebastian Shaffer

“Don’t sugar coat everything, Seb. You’ll get diabetes.”

Astoria Shaffer

“If you’re round, you might not be in shape, but hey! At least you’re a shape.”

Yelizaveta Shaffer

“Do you remember all the embarrassing moments you’ve had? Don’t worry, Sissy. I’ll remind you.”

Edward Shaffer

“There’s plenty of fish in the sea, but they don’t want to stay with you either. I’m sorry, Ed. Nobody wants to, not even Daddy and Mummy.”

Nephews/Nieces:

Iô Georgiadi Paraskeva

“What makes you different from the others is never your muteness, but the fact that you’re many deities within a body of a seemingly frail tootsie.”

Alexius Evangelos Paraskeva

“Nobody knows whether you’re as peculiar as your sister or not. Are you?”

Spouse: -

Current Partner: -

Ex-Partners: -

Teacher:

Lord Edgar Allan

“You reaped what you soughed, My Lord.”

Fellow Apprentices:

Séamus Seoighe

“Life is a death sentence. Instead of resenting Maxim, you should resent your parents.”

Zürau Samsa

“You're not bad, Samsa. Everyone else is just so much  better.”

Friends:

Vsevolod Kokorev

“My dearest friend from college. I was deeply shocked when Maxim told me that you were no longer here with us. You’ll be missed, Sev.”

Maxim Kokorev

“Don’t worry, boy. I won’t steal your Mama ... for now. NoーNo, please, Maxim that was a jokeー”

Synottra Lavrentyev

“Extremely beautiful, yet extremely dreadful. I admire you Sve, but it seems that ... someone has been keeping an eye on me, so I can’t do much. Not that I want to do much."

The Symbols (Shèngtáo, Xiù, Jìaqì, Hánfei)

“I swear that I’ll pay all of my debts somedayーsomehow. Don’t stalk me, for God’s sake.”

Enemies:

Killeatear Auvrearae Gyssedlues

“If life sucks, get a straw and show life who’s the boss.”

Howard Phillips

“The great ol’ Phillips is but a corpse. My niece admires you so, so much to the point that I can possibly feel glad, knowing that you’re dead.”